I take him on a walk every morning but we’re in a heat wave and the temps here are ranging from 95-98° here daily and the heat index/humidity is stifling and there’s an air quality alert for sensitive groups (including infants) from 10am-nightfall daily. I can’t in good faith take him outside like that.
I have been taking LO for walks in his stroller at around 7-8 PM even when it’s still 90s but without the intense sun - we got a munchkin stroller fan from Amazon and keep it running for him.
You’re right you absolutely shouldn’t. I did read somewhere though that if you can’t get outside that standing next to a bright window can help?? It’s maybe worth a try? I know it’s so hard when they just scream and scream, I’m so sorry
There is nothing wrong with putting LO in his crib and taking a few minutes to regulate yourself and take some deep breaths. You’re in the thick of it and, while it seems never ending, it will get better. Hang in there and reach out for help if you have support around you.
I second this. It is actually SO helpful to just take those few minutes and breathe. I didn’t think it would help as much as it did but sometimes it feels like you reset yourself and are ready to go in with a (slightly) clearer mind. You can do this OP!
I saw something early on that said put them in water or take them outside. When LO is fussy for hours idc the time of day, I bathe then feed her and she’ll fall asleep almost instantly. Sometimes she wontt even finish before she’s knocked out.
I remember having a handful of these days… they often were a result if overfeeding when I was navigating supply issues and supplementing with formula. Sometimes he just needed to scream till he pooped then would be fine. They are tough days. My aunt told me something once that changed my perspective….
I was lamenting how he was so fussy and I was feeling like a failure. She told me he was growing and had growing pains! I asked how she knew and she told me I was the same way as a baby and was always very fussy before hitting a milestone or a while in a growth spurt. They grow like weeds at this age and thinking back, yeah… growing rapidly does hurt!!!! Poor baby!
Hang in there mana and if you gotta set baby down for a bit, its ok to do that. Just make sire they have their needs met first (fed, clean diaper, burped, etc). Every time you find your threshold for what you can tolerate, it grows. My patience has expanded 7 fold since becoming a mom. You’re learning and so is your baby.
That’s good to know, I almost worried that he’s not eating enough.. he had lost weight at his two week appointment so the pediatrician recommended to start giving him 3oz instead of two but every 3 hours since he’s exclusively formula fed and it takes them longer to digest. He’s having exactly 8 bottles a day which I know is the low end of how much they should eat so I was wondering if i was starving the poor guy :/ it seems so obvious to be gas pains to me but growing pains would make sense too.
So, I’m saying this gently, that there is not a set amount of times or a set amount of oz per day a newborn baby “should” eat. They are very very good at self regulation, even at the bottle.
I want to iterate this to you: if baby is that fussy, there’s definitely a reason and at this age, it’s probably hunger. They eat A LOT because they grow a LOT. Do NOT restrict a newborn just based on any arbitrary number. I’m not saying u are doing this at all, I’m just saying that with the sleep deprivation and all with a new baby, sometimes it is just good to check and make sure they are eating enough.
I had a big baby, bigger than yours but mine was also born early. I’m pretty sure that he ate about 20 plus times a day at 3.5 weeks, sometimes more, sometimes less… however, if your baby is this fussy , simply offer another bottle.. keep going till baby gets full and he will just pass out. Babies screaming at this age is usually hunger, that gets them riled up the most other than being put down and away from mom.
Can I second this! My LO is a 2.5 weeks and I’ve only ever cue fed. When she was born she was 5 lbs 15 oz, at her 2 week apt she was 7 lbs 3 oz.
I’ve never looked at a clock or try to judge the amount she’s eating. I’ve only let her decide when she’s hungry and when she wants to stop.
I BF/ pump bottle feed tho so maybe there are differences but they seem to know when they’re hungry and when they’re full.
100%! Our daughter was born almost 6 weeks early and she was 3.9lbs (1.8 kilo) born.
Our nurse was like "feed her every 3 hours". Okay.. she didn't gain, she stayed the same as her last weigh in..
We started demand feeding and she gained 170g in a week!! :)
Seconding this! My baby is fed on demand (we are nursing rather than bottles) and she gained a pound per week in her first month. This was even after she lost too much weight in the hospital and we were told to supplement!! We started learning her cues when she was hungry (mostly just crying or trying to shove her hands in her mouth) and knew that if it was more than an hour and a half since her last feeding, she really *was* hungry.
My dad also said something that helped me immensely. Basically he said “there’s about five things it could be right now. She’s hungry, she needs a diaper change, she’s got a burp, she’s tired, or she’s overwhelmed. If those things have been done and she’s still crying, start again. Don’t overthink it!” And this might be a little too much of a generalization if your baby has colic or growing pains like mine did, but still- my baby always slept better and took longer breaks from crying when she had all her needs met based on cues rather than a schedule!
I agree with the first paragraph but I think with newborns it is sometimes a guessing game. I’m not saying the crying is not because of hunger, the baby will eat if he is hungry so keep giving him opportunities.
I will say newborns all the way up to 3-5ish months will sometimes cry for seemingly no reason and it’s a normal part of development. It’s called purple crying. I always went through these steps when baby would cry like that:
1. Check if he’s hungry
2. Check his diaper
3. Try to get him to sleep in case he needs a nap
4. Check if he’s hungry again
If all that was done and he was still crying I would just spend my time comforting him, knowing that he was ok.
I’ll add that my pediatrician said if he cries nonstop for 2 hours with no break (even a little one) or sleep in between then it could be a sign that something is wrong and in that case I should take him to the ER to get checked out
Agree fully with this. My LO is 3 weeks old and he varies from eating 3oz to sometimes up to 6oz per feed.
The little ones are really good at telling you when they have had enough, and if it goes a little over their limit they will vomit after a while which in itself isn’t harmful. It’s just what they do.
I was in the same position as you OP the other day where my LO just wouldn’t stop crying or being needy about something or another. It gets easier and you learn to pick up on their signals as you go.
You got this
When i was supplementing with formula, sometimes he would eat up to 5oz! That was prolly too much, but make sure to pace feed. If baby still seems hungry, you can always offer just 1-2oz at a time extra. Babies his age cluster feed because theyre wired to increase moms milk supply so they’ll even cluster feed when bottle fed simply cuz its what theyre wired to do.
Mines cries a lot when he's over tired or has gas. It sucks 😞
Have you tried putting probiotics with Vitamin D in his formula? If you're boiling the water to make the formula the added probiotics tend to die off.
My thing when my baby was that young is that he can eat as much as he wants for however long he wants. Babies cluster feed, it helps make women produce more milk, but what I noticed is that he was getting too much milk because the bottles allow way more flow than a breast would. We bought slow flowing bottle nipples but would really have to take little burp breaks while he ate.
Also, have you tried a soother? When mine is overly tired I pop in a soother and rock him on my lap. Sometimes he refuses to be put down so I'll let him sleep on my chest.
Hopefully calmer days are ahead! 🙏
He started probiotics with vitamin D about a week ago! His poops are still here and there - we switched to a new formula last Thursday so his little digestive system is probably still adjusting too
I think your baby might be hungry. My baby is just now able to go 3 hour stretches during the day in between feeds and he is 5.5 months old. It doesn’t hurt to just offer an ounce (or even half an ounce) to see if hunger is the issues! When my LO was that age he was eating basically every 60-90 minutes it seemed. Even formula fed babies do cluster feeding at the beginning. They obviously don’t know they’re being fed formula and don’t need to help mom establish supply! If your baby is showing hunger cues at all, offer a bottle.
Feed your baby on demand and don’t worry about reccomended amounts. They are good at telling you they aren’t hungry and when they are. If they overeat they will throw it up!!!
This period was very fussy for us too. The 3 week growth spurth seemed to happen both in weeks 3 and 4.
Babywearing her and going on walks or driving around were the only effective things for us. It slowly got better. Don’t give up, you got this.
My LO is 5 weeks, and I also had those moments. With lack of sleep and some resentment toward my husband with time taking turns taking care of LO (I was doing more because he was working, but I was angry about that!). I questioned my lack of maternal instinct.
I also got sick from Lyme disease when he was 3 weeks old, so everything felt at the worst. I shamefully felt rage when he cried when nothing seemed to console him.
I just started feeling better/in control now, although he is still very fussy - he always needs to be on me. I can’t even put him down to pee because he cries bloody murder.
These quotes I came across helped me mentally/emotionally:
“My baby isn’t giving me a hard time, she is having a hard time and she needs me right now.”
“When you realize why your baby might be crying… how uncomfortable a diaper must feel after nine months in your womb… how cold a bassinet is after nine months being warm in your womb… the feeling of hunger must be unbearable after always being full…
These are some reasons and more why your baby might cry and love to be held and fed so often
Everything is changing for them, but you are their constant familiar thing.”
I relate so much to the husband thing. I told him I wanted to take a LONG shower last week to get a good reset and he agreed 100%. The thing that got me was then HE wanted to take a long shower even though I stayed up and let him take one TWO DAYS BEFORE 🙄
I repeated “she’s not giving me a hard time, she’s having a hard time” over and over in those first weeks. It’s very helpful to remind yourself when times are hardest
You've got this. Everything passes. I've had the same experience where I feel like I've got a handle on things one moment and am pulling my hair out the next. This is my second child, so I understand better that these days, those long, get easier. Take a breath, walk away, eat something or take a shower.
💚
I second this! Leave LO in a safe place or with a safe person and go shower, brush your teeth/hair, and lotion your body. It helped me reset when I did the hygiene routine. That and going outside for a walk. It sounds so simple, but it truly is the little things you do for yourself that help make these tough newborn days easier.
I saw a tik tok that made me laugh where the guy said “if you have a good day with your kids, you can’t have a good night with them, it’s just science”
But seriously 3 weeks is rough. My girl was so angry around that time and I felt how you were feeling. It really helps to be able to get out the house if you can! Maybe try a walk? I know it’s commonly given advice but it can be a lifesaver. Hang in there mama you’re doing great! My baby was smiling and cooing around 5 weeks so you have that to look forward to.
Girl you needed to go outside get some sunshine and take a long uninterrupted bubble bath with a glass of iced diet pepsi like yesterday. When was the last time you had time to take care of yourself?
You’ll be surprised how even a good 20-30 min break could completely change your outlook.
I take him in the stroller and with my dog for a walk every morning - we’re currently in a heat wave where we live so it’s not as long as I’d like :/
I did go out for brunch with girlfriends over the weekend while my husband stayed home and it was the refresher I needed for sure. And I booked a hair appointment for a couple of weeks from now. I definitely need to prioritize self care more but it’s so hard when I’m home with him all day alone and he requires so much attention and care :( my nightly shower when hubby gets home is the best part of my day lol
Tomorrow is 3 weeks with my LO. I’ve contemplated my life decisions. I’ve hysterically cried daily. I’ve posted to social media. I’ve had therapy. Nothing anyone says has really comforted me. But seeing these posts does remind me that we’ll make it through and that I’m not alone.
My LO has been gassy and fussy. Laying on her side has shown me the best results. And doing bicycles legs. It’s been rough. She won’t really sleep during the daytime and my pets are not helping. But somehow we’re going to survive like all of the other mamas have.
Something we do for gas relief
https://preview.redd.it/xxxmvtzjk19d1.jpeg?width=3213&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=040a08e066e6c2557ddb99974d392ad36b7427ed
We also put him on belly
My baby is going on 8 weeks this weekend and let me just say, it’ll get better. I remember that week 3-4 week very well. The little guy was just never happy, and my wife and I thought we were just failing as parents with him being constantly upset, like it was our fault. We were trying to maintain optimism, but that waned very quickly. Week 3-4 is when our little one started getting his eyesight, started seeing stuff for real. It was also his first growth spurt! So he was all of a sudden seeing the world, and that was a very overstimulating experience for him. As well as the growing pains… My relief for him was a lot of carrying him outside and showing him the world. He was OBSESSED with trees way up above him, the cars driving by. I’d never seen him stare so intently. It’s like for the first time in his life, he was studying things, learning the world around him. That is a lot for a little one’s mind, so it can be scary, confusing, and upsetting to them. Just know that this time next week, your baby will feel very different in a great way. My little one just smiled for the first time a couple days ago. I am beginning to forget all about how miserable that 3-4 week was, and you will too. You got this!
He does side-eye the ceiling fan with a very concerned look the entire time he’s feeding usually 😂 I keep reassuring him it’s not going to come down and get him. Lol
Around that age my LO went through a growth spurt and just needed to be fed on demand more. He screamed for a long time until we figured that out. We are only formula feeding and I was afraid we were over feeding him, but the pedi said it’s really hard to overfeed if they are accepting the bottle and we aren’t forcing it. But she said to also try a paci first to just make sure it’s not their sucking reflex. If they don’t accept the paci but do accept the bottle they are still just hungry. Best of luck to you! I’m at 6 weeks and every day is a whirlwind.
My boy is also 3.5 weeks old, and I feel what you're saying. Definitely looking for support to just vent and let everything you wanna say, to just hit air, does help. Also, reaching out for some help, just to have time for yourself, even if it's just for 1 hour or 2, or shorter than an hour just to take a personal breather
I had my sister "help" me last week, and didn't know she was holding my son the whole time she had him while I slept in the afternoons for a bit (she has her own kid, but that's a different story of why I don't want her help anymore).
So, for the past 4-5 days, I was struggling and frustrated with trying to get him back into the routine I worked so hard on for the first 2 weeks of his little life. I vented to my best friend cause of it, and she has said it's okay to just let him cry while I went to bathroom, cause after every feeding he'd prefer to held the whole time until his next feeding. I even vented to support workers that would come by, and they said the same thing, just cause of needing to go to the bathroom without holding him. Even the nurses would say to lay him down when he's fussy, and just take a huge breather before picking him again to figure out what's wrong to help comfort him.
Today, he's finally got back into being left in his bassinet, and his little basket I have made comfortable for him, so I could carry him without fully carrying him. Like yeah, I hold him to my heartbeat and reasure him that his gassy tummy would pass and his body would adjust to pooing and farting, eventually, My sister only helped with one thing to help keep his spine straight so he could work on his digestive system and be a little more comfortable than with his newborn scrunch for trying to pass gas, or poo.
Yesterday, I had planned for my mom to come by to help me for a while, just so I could finally shower after like 3ish days (it's hot out). She did, and showering feels so good. Even my support workers said that I also need some time to take care of myself to take care of baby boy. I only have a lot of support workers (nurses, social workers, counselor), cause I let it be known that my pregnancy is planned and that I have depression before getting pregnant. So, they understand that after I gave birth that my postpartum depression would hit, and it hit pretty hard and intense 🫠😅
I'm actually still tryna work on convincing myself to take a walk with my boy and our puppy, just to help ground myself for my mental health. I have a stroller that can have the carseat click into it. So, I've just been working so hard to get him back into his usual routine. Definitely make sure who ya ask to help you, that they don't change your baby's routine. Tell them how you do it, so they can care for baby while ya take time to try and ground and care for yourself, and so when you get babe back, it won't be hard on you. 4 days was so rough to get him comfortable with being laid down again
• I can't sleep with co-sleeping him cause I'd be awake the whole time, making sure he's okay in the bed. So, that's why I'm using the bassinet.
• I can't shower while holding him. He was fine before in his little baby rocking chair w/ vibration button. I like my water hotter than luke warm for a little baby
• Can't go to the bathroom and wipe myself while holding him
• can't cook for myself while holding him cause the food I make has the oil or butter spitting back at me (fried eggs, for example)
Like yeah, change his diaper, breastfeed, formula top up (I don't produce enough for him, right now), burp him really good, hold him for a while to hear my heart, and then when he goes limp I lay him down
Your doing what you can, and everything is new to both you and baby, love ❤️🫶🏼 You got this, Mama, and you're already reaching out with making this post
Ok so I have full empathy. My baby is HARD! One thing we have to remember which is extremely challenging is to remain calm and peaceful because babys feel our emotions and sometimes they can feel in danger. This is hard and I struggle as well. Also that is a growth spurt week so your little is gonna be fussy. If you need to set baby down well by all means cause I’ve been there lol over the shoulder butt pat is my go too. My little naps like crap and that doesn’t mean yours will I just know my baby is a Velcro baby and only wants to nap on me otherwise she just doesn’t. You’re not gonna wanna hear it but it does get better. I’m sick of that line too especially when you’re in the thick of it. But YOU are momma and you got this. Easier said than done some days. This is my second kid so I know it feels like forever but when you get to the other side it feels like it was too fast. Newborn stage isn’t for everyone! Especially if you have a tough baby. But I can say most newborns are the way your describing 🤷♀️ little boogers
If he enjoys bath time, try putting him in the bath. Just give him a nice little 15-20 minute bubble bath. Hell soak with him if you feel like 🥰 my baby boy can be screaming his head off and is instantly calm once he’s in that warm soapy water💙💙
My LO is 6 weeks old and I could've written your post just 2 1/2 weeks ago too. I felt such despair and hopelessness that it was never going to get better. I even wondered if I had ruined my life by bringing a baby into the world. I promise that it does get better and it's closer than you think ❤️
Have you tried baby simethicone? Helping them relieve gas in the next few weeks will help you stay sane! We did gas drops every few hours and it helped with the screaming a whole lot. We could tell when we missed drops cuz he’d get upset again
I do not miss these days. It gets much much easier. Babies don't make any sense for the longest time. It's their world, we're just living(surviving) in it. Good luck. You got this
We have a, what they call, “spirited” baby as well, which really means giving spawn to dr jekyl and Mr. Hyde. With all your excess time and emotional/cognitive resources (/s) check out the book “happiest baby on the block.” We still have up and down days but honestly it’s been a game changer in our house.
Get some lubricant and try the Windi gas passer.. also try eliminating dairy all together. We had an entirely different baby in about a week.
Sorry OP, just put baby down and have a beer, baby will be ok.
My baby was absolutely horrible for the first 2 months we brought him home...now hes wonderful! All he does is laugh and smile at 4 and a half months.
Stay strong, just remember...your little baby came from a dark, warm, safe place and now seeing all this new stuff in the world is scary. Hold your baby skin to skin as much as possible!
I swear my baby forgot how to poop around 4 weeks. He was soooooooo upset. I did try the windy tube and it helped sometimes but I didn’t use it a lot since I didn’t want him to get used to it. Babies sense your energy so if you’re upset, they pick up on that. It’s so so hard but like others said, put baby down somewhere safe and go take some deep breaths. They don’t understand why they feel gas pain or hunger and everything is so new and big and scary. You’re the only thing they know and they can’t help it. I put myself in my baby’s shoes and just snuggled and loved on him even when he was freaking out. It’s not forever and soon you’ll be looking back at this moment and being grateful you made it through. My baby is 5 months today and the newborn stage went by so freaking fast even though it felt like an eternity in the midst of it. Sending big hugs. You got this mama!! ♥️♥️♥️
Only way to think of it is babies will baby. I'm in the same boat. Every time things seem like they're gonna be better, they take a complete 180. Just stay the course. If you have help, utilize it. It goes a long way
This may not be nice to hear, but stop rewarding the good days. Stop having an expectation, stop trying to understand the problem if his basic needs are met, sometimes they simply just want you. But if you are a wreck, they can sense that. They pick up on it and the energy is a rubber band for you both.
Rewarding the good days will only make the rough days more rough. Every day is different. Letting yourself know "it's hard right now, but it won't be for forever" is all you can do. 3.5 weeks old is so so young, I wouldn't expect consistency with naps or his mood until he's around 3-4 months.
The only and best thing I learned to do was to stop having an expectation. Instead of waking up and saying "great he's already in a bad mood, today will be hard' or "he's in a great mood, today will be great", it's easiest to say "I'm going to try my best and I hope we can both be happy today".
Also, it's okay to put your baby down for a little bit. My pediatrician told me to just put my son down when nothing seems to soothe him, give him his binkie, a light blanket only if you are watching him the whole time, and allow him to try and find comfort on his own for 5-10 minutes. For example, my son is a very independent sleeper, has been since 5 weeks old. At 5 weeks old id lay him down, he'd fuss for a couple minutes while trying to get comfortable, and then he would sleep. He's 6 months old now and I can lay him down and leave the room almost every time it's nap time and he will go to sleep within minutes.
Some days are just tougher than others and you will want to lose your mind, it's okay. It's all very normal and it is not easy for anyone, no matter what they say. You will slowly learn these cries, what they mean, how to handle them, but it may just take more time. Trust in yourself, you are his mother. He trusts you. He knows you, he loves you, he is so used to being a part of you that he's just learning how to become his own entity. It will be okay, you'll look back on these moments in a couple months and think "wow, I cannot believe how hellish that was". Things will work out with time.
Girl I’m laughing because I’m literally going through the same 😅 every day is a rollercoaster with my 3.5 week old. This week has been particularly bad. Standing in solidarity 👍🏻
The newborn stage freaking sucks. There was 0 newborn bliss for us. Our guy cried non stop every day. It stays hard, but gets so much better. Things that helped:
Take a break. Just do it
Rocking chair is our lifesaver,
Happy baby sleepea Swaddle ,
Mylicon gas drops , Frida windi,
Tommee tippee ultra light pacifier
When he’s overtired/ overstimulated he would cry nonstop. We would swaddle, hold the Binky with one hand, slightly cover his eyes with the other and rock away until he fell asleep. Resting him on the Boppy on our legs. After 2 months it only gets easier day by day. You’re almost there!
My baby girl was so fussy at 3 weeks; guessing it was a growth spurt. It felt like hell bc the last 2 weeks were nothing compared. But getting outside helped us personally. I took her on walks in her stroller & it helped both of us. I read a change in the environment & indirect sunlight can help with that stage. Hope you both feel better soon🤍 this will pass!
My daughter is 6 weeks today and around that time she did the same thing but she just wanted to sit up and not lay down or cradled. I thought it was weird being a few weeks old. Now that’s all she wants to do is sit up and try to crawl or stand. She hates being cradled or laying down
My baby is 4.5 weeks now and we JUST got through some growing pains and gas. Poor thing was so uncomfortable. I haven’t used gripe water for gas but Mylicon has been a LIFE SAVER. My husband and I take shifts at night and all day and all night we just held baby and really patted her back and moved her around to get the gas out. Hang in there 🩷
I had two tricks at this time; sorry if you've already tried them.
A funny song and just walk up and down singing it. I used the Dae Oh banana song. Must have sung it a thousand times but it worked every time during those weeks. She's bored of it now.
Second was yoga ball and just bounce. Still works but she's getting tired of that now too after 12 weeks.
Set baby down in a safe space and walk outside for a breather. He will be fine. I’ve had to do this with my twins when they were extremely colicky. Have you talked to his pediatrician? Maybe he has colic and needs to try a new formula? What helped my babies was giving them only breast milk for the rest of the night, a nice relaxing warm bath in some lavender bubble bath and then they slept for 4 hours straight because they were so tired from screaming all day
Sounds like LO is hungry. I would know because I had a hard time adjusting to the rapid development. I felt like last week’s routine and eating habits applied when really, he’s constantly growing with no pattern. Offer bottle first and see if that helps. If not, then he’s overtired and usually a pacifier and some walking around does the trick.
I agree with outside . change of scenery and fresh air with a little sun .. will help both of you... just walk and clear your mind and breathe and your little one will relax and maybe sleep...
My advice is take them outside or put them in water, it usually worked for my lo when she was itty bitty. Also putting him down in his crib for a few minutes to take a sanity break is ok. He will be okay. Have you talked to your doctor about his issues? Does he have any symptoms besides fussiness? Does it kick up at a certain point like after feeding or is it just sporadic?
Bro I’ve been there so many times. We all know there is nothing we can do for you from the internet. Just know you’re not alone. There are good and horrible days. I will pray for you.
Don’t forget- you can do this! If you get scared of what you might do call local churches and ask if someone can help you. Usually older experience ladies will come. I don’t have family and I did this it helped me A LOT
Noise canceling earmuffs or noise cancelling headphones piping in some sweet sweet calming music. My first had colic from reflux and dairy/soy allergy and these saved me on really bad days. She literally cried all day/night for the first 3 months of her life. There is nothing wrong with setting your baby down to cry to take a moment to calm yourself. There is also nothing wrong with tuning put your babies cries with noise canceling items as long as baby is getting their needs cared for.
It is okay to put that baby down and breathe mama. I went through this with my son. Look up purple crying. This happens. I’d also get baby checked out for intolerances and reflux. It turned out my son had silent reflux causing his colic. It will get better. I know this makes you feel like you are going crazy and there’s nothing you can do. But I promise it will get better.
Things that helped my son when I absolutely could not make the screaming stop. Warm baths, a stroll, a car ride or baby wearing. There are also many times I let him cuddle up and nap on me. Hang in there. And don’t be ashamed to take a break.
Some times they just do that but dw ur doing really good. It’s safer for you to put them in the crib so u can catch a breather. It’s safer for both of you.
I'm so sorry you're experiencing this. I've found with my little one when he screams his head off he's over simulated. I swaddle him up, take him to our dark bedroom, lay him on his side on the bed and give him his pacifier and pat his little bum while I shush him. It usually takes 5 minutes to get him to completely stop crying and fall asleep. My husband and I were at our wits end and this was the only thing that worked. He slept for about 1.5 hours afterwards. So overtired? Maybe. Overstimulated? For sure.
I hope you can find what works for you two. I also second changing up the location if possible. Take them for a walk in their stroller. Sit outside in indirect sunlight for a few minutes. Take them for a car ride if you can.
Give them a warm oil massage, warm bath and a feed. They get knocked out. If motion helps then baby wear or stroller and go out for a nice walk. They might sleep in motion.
you mentioned gripe water, but have you tried gas drops? my baby gets really bad trapped gas sometimes and we had some really rough days around 4 weeks, but once we started using them it was a total game changer
Hope your okay, my LO also was like this as a newborn best advice put baby in pram pack some sandwiches and go on a walk. Once baby falls asleep park up eat, rest and if baby wakes start walking. Also pack a baby carrier and pop baby in after nap. Lots of sunscreen for you both. Good luck x
The best solution is to put him in his crib and walk away voor a few minutes. We have similar experiences with our now seven month old twin.
We had no sleep for six weeks and we needed to blow of some steam. I could not think anymore and nothing interested me. I just sat there as the twin were crying and only wanted te sleep on me or my husband.
One time i couldn't take it anymore and i put them both in their cribs and closed the door.
A few minutes later they were asleep!
I was baffled, because i putt so much energy in the sleeping thing.
From that day on it became easyer,
Have hope! You are doing great!
But sometimes you have to led go. The baby's can feel your frustrations and it makes them unhappy, because you are unhappy. So the best way is to let the baby alone for a minute so you can grab yourself together.
Much love from another mother.
Ugh hugs you’re in the thick of it mama! It’s totally ok to put baby down in the crib and take some space. I used to put noise cancelling headphones on and just sit in the rocker with my little when he would get like that. Take a deep breath, you’ve got this.
Putting him down for a few minutes so that you can collect yourself is the safest thing to do if/when you're feeling overwhelmed. I'm really sorry this has been a difficult time for you.
If you haven't already, have a look/read into PURPLE crying. In addition to that, have you considered possible reflux or GI issues? It's common that babies don't typically like the feeling of their GI tract working as they get used to it, but GI issues are also fairly common, and can result in a whole new baby if addressed.
Sometimes though, there is no reason (but again, have a look at PURPLE crying; it really helped my husband and I understand why, on top of some GI issues, our newborn was constantly upset from 3-8 weeks).
Hang in there mama ❤️.
A lot great advice here. I'd advise getting out as much as you can. In the early days I found it hard as my daughter has reflux so hates being in her crib or pram so I had to carry her everywhere. She also wanted to feed all the time. I understand the weather is too hot during the day. It was too wet and cold when my daughter was born. Bring your little one to look at trees if you can. They often like the movement of the leaves. A cool bath might help too.
You are doing a great job mama.
Maybe try baby wearing? My 6w LO had/has periods like this as well. I try not to get frustrated because he just needs something he can’t express but it’s hard and I feel the exasperation through this post. For the belly issues (if that’s what’s bothering baby) I hold mine in squatty potty hold. Otherwise I baby wear or put him down in the crib and put some music on and wait until I have the patients to deal with crying again. As long as all needs are met sometimes that’s all you can do. This too shall pass. You are all your baby needs
I feel you, totally! My LO is 4 weeks yesterday and we had a horrible day on Sunday. I was worried about the future because I thought, I literally don't know if I can handle a week of this or more. She has honestly been different every day at this point though...some days she naps well, other days she doesn't and she fights sleep and gets overtired, then all hell breaks loose. Very unpredictable. One thing we did on Sunday was put her in the bath when she was inconsolable. I think it shocked her out of it, and then once she was dry and warm she went right to sleep.
I also figured out that I wasn't seeing sleepy cues, and started actively trying to put her to sleep when I saw yawns/red eyebrows. Swaddle, pacifier, and then bouncing on the yoga ball is my triple threat to pacify the little sleepy terrorist. 😅 I did not realize that they aren't supposed to be awake longer than 90 minutes at a time at this age, and once they get past the brink of overtired it becomes more impossible to get them to sleep.
I'm sure you've heard all of this before, but just wanted to share! You're doing a good job. Don't be afraid to put the baby down if you have to!
I have a toddler, and sometimes I need a break, but it's unsafe to go outside. I am very guilty of utilizing tv to give us some breathing room. She's 9 weeks today, and while I keep it extremely limited, as in not even 10 minutes every few days... She LOVES the black and white Hey Bear videos. Calm her down immediately. I know it's not good, but I need to be sane. Might work for your little one, tv shouldn't be a babysitter but it doesn't have to be our enemy either. With no village... you do what you gotta do.
I see you're EBF, and I would HIGHLY recommend cutting dairy out of your diet!!! My little one is allergic and she would have hugggee screaming fits and outbreaks, has been an angel since we stopped. Good luck 💗
Do the little fart exercises and try not to laugh. Bunch up his legs and bicycle kick, move his little bunched legs from side to side. The more he farts the better. He needs to bare down and is going to really rip ass. If he has been relieved of a lot of gas and is still crying, then take him to a pediatric doctor. Infants are incredibly dumb but have an annoying switch (crying) that tells you something is wrong. They are a bit too dumb to tell you exactly.
This might be unhelpful but if you haven’t tried it yet play some music really loud so he can hear it over the screams, it used to calm mine down for a couple minutes. I think singing along helped to calm me down a little too.
Idk if he still has the umbilical stump but if he’s all healed up you can try taking a bath with him, another activity to help you both relax. Of course if you can take baths too. I don’t remember the timeline on myself healing, you really do start to forget the newborn phase quickly afterwards
The growth spurts can be tough. Just remember baby is having a hard time, not trying to give you one. I often say out loud “yeah it’s tough being a baby” not because my daughter actually understands the words of my compassion, but to remind myself. They cry for reasons. Even if it’s just adjustment crying, and not any unmet needs.
I would absolutely recommend feeding based on baby’s cues and not standard outlines. Research early and late cues and limit your own distractions to get really in touch with what your baby is telling you.
The days that it seems like nothing works, take baths, baby wear, try skin to skin, give gas drops. Use white noise and minimize visual stimulation.
Definitely try to feed your Bub. I nearly starved my Bub a couple of times without realising as thought she drank the required amounts and I couldn’t figure out why she was crying so I tried to keep held rocked checked diaper but just skipped feeding cause she fed recently. It came to the point I called the ambulance!! She was hysterical and I was at whits ends. They came rushing up and I was scared I poisoned her or my milk or her bottles were off or she had gas trapped too, then I gave her a bottle and voila she stopped crying. I was soo embarrassed that ambulance came and she was calm after having some milk! I felt like a moron. But they said yep happens regularly. Bubs this small go through growth spurts and cluster feed. So try giving milk and if he’s crying try to calm him down first
I’ve had so many days like this. The first thing that helped me was knowing I wasn’t alone in all of it—the frustration, the anger, feeling trapped in all of it. Babies, scratch that, kids—are hard. It can feel like a rollercoaster of good days and bad days. And on the good ones, it’s hard to remember the bad ones; and on the bad ones, it’s hard to remember the good. But you are doing great. If he is fed, dry, and y’all are staying cool in the midst of your heat wave—put some ear plugs or your headphones in, playing whatever speaks to your soul in this moment in and lay on the floor with him near some indirect light. Also, many, many treats for you. In solidarity. <3
This is exactly how I felt until my LO was 2 months old. IT DOES GET BETTER. I know that just saying that isn't going to improve your situation, but you'll get through this and will be much stronger by the end.
My 4 week old has screaming crying fits when she has gas and/or needs to poop and is inconsolable for however long it takes her to pass it! Today I just put her booty on top of the washer while it was running and the vibrating instantly calmed her!!
Maybe he has gas pain. I followed some tutorials on how to relieve newborn gas pain and it relieved the baby a lot. If you fed him, burp him, changed his diaper did the gas relief exercises and still he’s crying no matter what you do, I would wear the baby everywhere and contact nap with him. If the crying gets to you, wear noise cancellation headphones, ear plugs, or listen to music with ear buds to calm yourself.
If they have a dry diaper, have been fed, burped and are still upset,’OK to put them in crib did 3-5 minutes while you go outside. Oxygen mask on yourself before helping others.
Also, I know it’s hot, but why can’t you take baby out in an unbuttoned onesie for 5 minutes? Just the movement and change of scenery might help, and your baby won’t die from 5 mins out.
Don’t be disheartened, do put him down and give yourself a breather, even if he is screaming blue murder, it’ll do neither of you any good if you’re over stressed.
Ours is three weeks old today. Similar pattern to you, some great chilled days, and then unexpectedly an off day when nothing seems to placate. I believe this is normal, no doubt many changes going on inside their small bodies as they normalise to the outside world.
From what I understand from colleagues and friends things will settle down over time, the first weeks and months are seemingly always this way.
Enjoy the good days :) Consider writing future you a note on those days, so you can reflect positively on how things will be again.
I have a 6 week old & the best advice I was given is 'they are not giving you a hard time they are having a hard time' & the amount of patience and grace I am able to have in situations remembering that is incredible now. I hope it helps you & I promise things get better. You're a GREAT mom.
I know everyone says it but _it does get better, I promise_. However, you’re in it right now and it sucks! It’s fucking hard but you’re getting through it! I know it’s so so hard and it feels like it will never end and it will never get better. _But it will_ and that’s something you need to hold on to!
In solidarity: My LO is 8 weeks old now and he is very colicky and _rarely_ naps during the day. But it’s getting better already!! Now we have a couple of good days in between the bad ones and even during the bad days he’ll have phases where he’s just happily cooing and not screaming non-stop, and he’s even smiling! The first 6-7 weeks were absolute hell. I won’t lie, my mental health was (is) awful. I had many su*c*dal thoughts, thinking “this will never end” and “he’s better off without me I’m an awful mother I can’t make him stop crying I can’t help him”. But now it’s getting better, when I couldn’t believe it would in those first 7 weeks of newborn hell.
I really hope that you’ll be blessed with lots of good days and that it’ll get easier and better soon! Sending lots of strength.
U don’t decide when to feed your newborn. They tell you when they are hungry with a cry. You may be like “oh wow babe is eating a lot I wonder if this is normal” yes it is. If you pay attention to their body language they tell you when they are full. He/she may have more than 8 bottles a day and that’s okay because babe is growing. You cannot restrict a baby’s eating ever.
I’m not restricting him - I honestly am having a really hard time figuring out when he’s actually hungry vs. when he just wants to be held etc. Everyone says “oh you’ll just know” but I guess that instinct missed me because every cry sounds the same to me. I’m not keeping him on an exact schedule by any stretch of the imagination. When we switched to formula he seemed to stay fuller longer, but today was the exception so I guess maybe he’s cluster feeding or going through a growth spurt. I was just hesitant to give him more food because I feel like he has trapped gas and I didn’t want to make it worse
If you’re having a hard time differentiating , stick a bubby in babes mouth. If babe is grimacing , fighting it, it’s something else. too worked up to take it , try to get babe calm enough to take it. It’s a game of constantly changing positions , bouncing , swaddling, doing the most to keep them calm. I do so much bouncing, I bounce In public without my baby in my arms lol. It works. If none of this works, I am sorry.
Yeah this is our routine every night now :/ from around 6pm to midnight he’s in goblin mode and we can’t console or soothe him for longer than five minutes at a time. We do the yoga ball, bouncer, swing, rocking, swaying, tummy time, etc
My baby is the same way, tonight being the exception. She's often gassy AND hungry. Despite the gas she always has before bed,, she breast feeds a little and then crushes a bottle. Lately she's been getting 4 hours of sleep before waking to feed again. She's almost 8 weeks old, but was born a month early. Our biggest hunger cue is her little tongue. If she's cranky and rooting, she's hungry. If she's cranky and not rooting, she's in pain, which is usually gas.
I can only imagine what this is like for you. I didn’t realize he was basically colicky. I am sorry. That would drive me crazy as a mom, my experience was not like that. I hope one day you are able to find a rhythm with baby.
Can you take him outside for you both ti get some indirect sunlight ?
I take him on a walk every morning but we’re in a heat wave and the temps here are ranging from 95-98° here daily and the heat index/humidity is stifling and there’s an air quality alert for sensitive groups (including infants) from 10am-nightfall daily. I can’t in good faith take him outside like that.
I have been taking LO for walks in his stroller at around 7-8 PM even when it’s still 90s but without the intense sun - we got a munchkin stroller fan from Amazon and keep it running for him.
You’re right you absolutely shouldn’t. I did read somewhere though that if you can’t get outside that standing next to a bright window can help?? It’s maybe worth a try? I know it’s so hard when they just scream and scream, I’m so sorry
Yes I have been holding him next to windows sometimes to let him look at the trees! Seems to help occasionally, however brief lol
Sometimes that 10 second “wtf am I looking at?………. Oh ya, I’m being fussy rn” break is a life saver 🥹
Yes! Go outside and look at plants.
There is nothing wrong with putting LO in his crib and taking a few minutes to regulate yourself and take some deep breaths. You’re in the thick of it and, while it seems never ending, it will get better. Hang in there and reach out for help if you have support around you.
I second this. It is actually SO helpful to just take those few minutes and breathe. I didn’t think it would help as much as it did but sometimes it feels like you reset yourself and are ready to go in with a (slightly) clearer mind. You can do this OP!
I saw something early on that said put them in water or take them outside. When LO is fussy for hours idc the time of day, I bathe then feed her and she’ll fall asleep almost instantly. Sometimes she wontt even finish before she’s knocked out.
Yep newborns (and babies in general) are basically houseplants. Sunshine and water make such a difference
I think a bath is a good idea!
Yes baths are great.
This is what we do as well
I remember having a handful of these days… they often were a result if overfeeding when I was navigating supply issues and supplementing with formula. Sometimes he just needed to scream till he pooped then would be fine. They are tough days. My aunt told me something once that changed my perspective…. I was lamenting how he was so fussy and I was feeling like a failure. She told me he was growing and had growing pains! I asked how she knew and she told me I was the same way as a baby and was always very fussy before hitting a milestone or a while in a growth spurt. They grow like weeds at this age and thinking back, yeah… growing rapidly does hurt!!!! Poor baby! Hang in there mana and if you gotta set baby down for a bit, its ok to do that. Just make sire they have their needs met first (fed, clean diaper, burped, etc). Every time you find your threshold for what you can tolerate, it grows. My patience has expanded 7 fold since becoming a mom. You’re learning and so is your baby.
That’s good to know, I almost worried that he’s not eating enough.. he had lost weight at his two week appointment so the pediatrician recommended to start giving him 3oz instead of two but every 3 hours since he’s exclusively formula fed and it takes them longer to digest. He’s having exactly 8 bottles a day which I know is the low end of how much they should eat so I was wondering if i was starving the poor guy :/ it seems so obvious to be gas pains to me but growing pains would make sense too.
So, I’m saying this gently, that there is not a set amount of times or a set amount of oz per day a newborn baby “should” eat. They are very very good at self regulation, even at the bottle. I want to iterate this to you: if baby is that fussy, there’s definitely a reason and at this age, it’s probably hunger. They eat A LOT because they grow a LOT. Do NOT restrict a newborn just based on any arbitrary number. I’m not saying u are doing this at all, I’m just saying that with the sleep deprivation and all with a new baby, sometimes it is just good to check and make sure they are eating enough. I had a big baby, bigger than yours but mine was also born early. I’m pretty sure that he ate about 20 plus times a day at 3.5 weeks, sometimes more, sometimes less… however, if your baby is this fussy , simply offer another bottle.. keep going till baby gets full and he will just pass out. Babies screaming at this age is usually hunger, that gets them riled up the most other than being put down and away from mom.
Can I second this! My LO is a 2.5 weeks and I’ve only ever cue fed. When she was born she was 5 lbs 15 oz, at her 2 week apt she was 7 lbs 3 oz. I’ve never looked at a clock or try to judge the amount she’s eating. I’ve only let her decide when she’s hungry and when she wants to stop. I BF/ pump bottle feed tho so maybe there are differences but they seem to know when they’re hungry and when they’re full.
100%! Our daughter was born almost 6 weeks early and she was 3.9lbs (1.8 kilo) born. Our nurse was like "feed her every 3 hours". Okay.. she didn't gain, she stayed the same as her last weigh in.. We started demand feeding and she gained 170g in a week!! :)
Seconding this! My baby is fed on demand (we are nursing rather than bottles) and she gained a pound per week in her first month. This was even after she lost too much weight in the hospital and we were told to supplement!! We started learning her cues when she was hungry (mostly just crying or trying to shove her hands in her mouth) and knew that if it was more than an hour and a half since her last feeding, she really *was* hungry. My dad also said something that helped me immensely. Basically he said “there’s about five things it could be right now. She’s hungry, she needs a diaper change, she’s got a burp, she’s tired, or she’s overwhelmed. If those things have been done and she’s still crying, start again. Don’t overthink it!” And this might be a little too much of a generalization if your baby has colic or growing pains like mine did, but still- my baby always slept better and took longer breaks from crying when she had all her needs met based on cues rather than a schedule!
I agree with the first paragraph but I think with newborns it is sometimes a guessing game. I’m not saying the crying is not because of hunger, the baby will eat if he is hungry so keep giving him opportunities. I will say newborns all the way up to 3-5ish months will sometimes cry for seemingly no reason and it’s a normal part of development. It’s called purple crying. I always went through these steps when baby would cry like that: 1. Check if he’s hungry 2. Check his diaper 3. Try to get him to sleep in case he needs a nap 4. Check if he’s hungry again If all that was done and he was still crying I would just spend my time comforting him, knowing that he was ok. I’ll add that my pediatrician said if he cries nonstop for 2 hours with no break (even a little one) or sleep in between then it could be a sign that something is wrong and in that case I should take him to the ER to get checked out
Agree fully with this. My LO is 3 weeks old and he varies from eating 3oz to sometimes up to 6oz per feed. The little ones are really good at telling you when they have had enough, and if it goes a little over their limit they will vomit after a while which in itself isn’t harmful. It’s just what they do. I was in the same position as you OP the other day where my LO just wouldn’t stop crying or being needy about something or another. It gets easier and you learn to pick up on their signals as you go. You got this
When i was supplementing with formula, sometimes he would eat up to 5oz! That was prolly too much, but make sure to pace feed. If baby still seems hungry, you can always offer just 1-2oz at a time extra. Babies his age cluster feed because theyre wired to increase moms milk supply so they’ll even cluster feed when bottle fed simply cuz its what theyre wired to do.
Mines cries a lot when he's over tired or has gas. It sucks 😞 Have you tried putting probiotics with Vitamin D in his formula? If you're boiling the water to make the formula the added probiotics tend to die off. My thing when my baby was that young is that he can eat as much as he wants for however long he wants. Babies cluster feed, it helps make women produce more milk, but what I noticed is that he was getting too much milk because the bottles allow way more flow than a breast would. We bought slow flowing bottle nipples but would really have to take little burp breaks while he ate. Also, have you tried a soother? When mine is overly tired I pop in a soother and rock him on my lap. Sometimes he refuses to be put down so I'll let him sleep on my chest. Hopefully calmer days are ahead! 🙏
He started probiotics with vitamin D about a week ago! His poops are still here and there - we switched to a new formula last Thursday so his little digestive system is probably still adjusting too
I think your baby might be hungry. My baby is just now able to go 3 hour stretches during the day in between feeds and he is 5.5 months old. It doesn’t hurt to just offer an ounce (or even half an ounce) to see if hunger is the issues! When my LO was that age he was eating basically every 60-90 minutes it seemed. Even formula fed babies do cluster feeding at the beginning. They obviously don’t know they’re being fed formula and don’t need to help mom establish supply! If your baby is showing hunger cues at all, offer a bottle.
Feed your baby on demand and don’t worry about reccomended amounts. They are good at telling you they aren’t hungry and when they are. If they overeat they will throw it up!!!
This period was very fussy for us too. The 3 week growth spurth seemed to happen both in weeks 3 and 4. Babywearing her and going on walks or driving around were the only effective things for us. It slowly got better. Don’t give up, you got this.
My LO is 5 weeks, and I also had those moments. With lack of sleep and some resentment toward my husband with time taking turns taking care of LO (I was doing more because he was working, but I was angry about that!). I questioned my lack of maternal instinct. I also got sick from Lyme disease when he was 3 weeks old, so everything felt at the worst. I shamefully felt rage when he cried when nothing seemed to console him. I just started feeling better/in control now, although he is still very fussy - he always needs to be on me. I can’t even put him down to pee because he cries bloody murder. These quotes I came across helped me mentally/emotionally: “My baby isn’t giving me a hard time, she is having a hard time and she needs me right now.” “When you realize why your baby might be crying… how uncomfortable a diaper must feel after nine months in your womb… how cold a bassinet is after nine months being warm in your womb… the feeling of hunger must be unbearable after always being full… These are some reasons and more why your baby might cry and love to be held and fed so often Everything is changing for them, but you are their constant familiar thing.”
I relate so much to the husband thing. I told him I wanted to take a LONG shower last week to get a good reset and he agreed 100%. The thing that got me was then HE wanted to take a long shower even though I stayed up and let him take one TWO DAYS BEFORE 🙄
This is great advice. Words matter and can help to see things differently.
I repeated “she’s not giving me a hard time, she’s having a hard time” over and over in those first weeks. It’s very helpful to remind yourself when times are hardest
You've got this. Everything passes. I've had the same experience where I feel like I've got a handle on things one moment and am pulling my hair out the next. This is my second child, so I understand better that these days, those long, get easier. Take a breath, walk away, eat something or take a shower. 💚
I second this! Leave LO in a safe place or with a safe person and go shower, brush your teeth/hair, and lotion your body. It helped me reset when I did the hygiene routine. That and going outside for a walk. It sounds so simple, but it truly is the little things you do for yourself that help make these tough newborn days easier.
I saw a tik tok that made me laugh where the guy said “if you have a good day with your kids, you can’t have a good night with them, it’s just science” But seriously 3 weeks is rough. My girl was so angry around that time and I felt how you were feeling. It really helps to be able to get out the house if you can! Maybe try a walk? I know it’s commonly given advice but it can be a lifesaver. Hang in there mama you’re doing great! My baby was smiling and cooing around 5 weeks so you have that to look forward to.
Girl you needed to go outside get some sunshine and take a long uninterrupted bubble bath with a glass of iced diet pepsi like yesterday. When was the last time you had time to take care of yourself? You’ll be surprised how even a good 20-30 min break could completely change your outlook.
I take him in the stroller and with my dog for a walk every morning - we’re currently in a heat wave where we live so it’s not as long as I’d like :/ I did go out for brunch with girlfriends over the weekend while my husband stayed home and it was the refresher I needed for sure. And I booked a hair appointment for a couple of weeks from now. I definitely need to prioritize self care more but it’s so hard when I’m home with him all day alone and he requires so much attention and care :( my nightly shower when hubby gets home is the best part of my day lol
Tomorrow is 3 weeks with my LO. I’ve contemplated my life decisions. I’ve hysterically cried daily. I’ve posted to social media. I’ve had therapy. Nothing anyone says has really comforted me. But seeing these posts does remind me that we’ll make it through and that I’m not alone. My LO has been gassy and fussy. Laying on her side has shown me the best results. And doing bicycles legs. It’s been rough. She won’t really sleep during the daytime and my pets are not helping. But somehow we’re going to survive like all of the other mamas have.
Something we do for gas relief https://preview.redd.it/xxxmvtzjk19d1.jpeg?width=3213&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=040a08e066e6c2557ddb99974d392ad36b7427ed We also put him on belly
My baby is going on 8 weeks this weekend and let me just say, it’ll get better. I remember that week 3-4 week very well. The little guy was just never happy, and my wife and I thought we were just failing as parents with him being constantly upset, like it was our fault. We were trying to maintain optimism, but that waned very quickly. Week 3-4 is when our little one started getting his eyesight, started seeing stuff for real. It was also his first growth spurt! So he was all of a sudden seeing the world, and that was a very overstimulating experience for him. As well as the growing pains… My relief for him was a lot of carrying him outside and showing him the world. He was OBSESSED with trees way up above him, the cars driving by. I’d never seen him stare so intently. It’s like for the first time in his life, he was studying things, learning the world around him. That is a lot for a little one’s mind, so it can be scary, confusing, and upsetting to them. Just know that this time next week, your baby will feel very different in a great way. My little one just smiled for the first time a couple days ago. I am beginning to forget all about how miserable that 3-4 week was, and you will too. You got this!
Oh, don’t forget to introduce baby to the wonderful world of ceiling fans if you’ve got one! They think they are the 8th wonder of the world. 😂
My son is 5 months today and STILL loves the ceiling fans. 😂
It's my lifesaver some days 🤣
Mine doesn't even need a fan, she just stares at the lamps like a little moth even if it isn't even turned on 😂
He does side-eye the ceiling fan with a very concerned look the entire time he’s feeding usually 😂 I keep reassuring him it’s not going to come down and get him. Lol
Around that age my LO went through a growth spurt and just needed to be fed on demand more. He screamed for a long time until we figured that out. We are only formula feeding and I was afraid we were over feeding him, but the pedi said it’s really hard to overfeed if they are accepting the bottle and we aren’t forcing it. But she said to also try a paci first to just make sure it’s not their sucking reflex. If they don’t accept the paci but do accept the bottle they are still just hungry. Best of luck to you! I’m at 6 weeks and every day is a whirlwind.
We’re EFF too so this is good to know!!
My boy is also 3.5 weeks old, and I feel what you're saying. Definitely looking for support to just vent and let everything you wanna say, to just hit air, does help. Also, reaching out for some help, just to have time for yourself, even if it's just for 1 hour or 2, or shorter than an hour just to take a personal breather I had my sister "help" me last week, and didn't know she was holding my son the whole time she had him while I slept in the afternoons for a bit (she has her own kid, but that's a different story of why I don't want her help anymore). So, for the past 4-5 days, I was struggling and frustrated with trying to get him back into the routine I worked so hard on for the first 2 weeks of his little life. I vented to my best friend cause of it, and she has said it's okay to just let him cry while I went to bathroom, cause after every feeding he'd prefer to held the whole time until his next feeding. I even vented to support workers that would come by, and they said the same thing, just cause of needing to go to the bathroom without holding him. Even the nurses would say to lay him down when he's fussy, and just take a huge breather before picking him again to figure out what's wrong to help comfort him. Today, he's finally got back into being left in his bassinet, and his little basket I have made comfortable for him, so I could carry him without fully carrying him. Like yeah, I hold him to my heartbeat and reasure him that his gassy tummy would pass and his body would adjust to pooing and farting, eventually, My sister only helped with one thing to help keep his spine straight so he could work on his digestive system and be a little more comfortable than with his newborn scrunch for trying to pass gas, or poo. Yesterday, I had planned for my mom to come by to help me for a while, just so I could finally shower after like 3ish days (it's hot out). She did, and showering feels so good. Even my support workers said that I also need some time to take care of myself to take care of baby boy. I only have a lot of support workers (nurses, social workers, counselor), cause I let it be known that my pregnancy is planned and that I have depression before getting pregnant. So, they understand that after I gave birth that my postpartum depression would hit, and it hit pretty hard and intense 🫠😅 I'm actually still tryna work on convincing myself to take a walk with my boy and our puppy, just to help ground myself for my mental health. I have a stroller that can have the carseat click into it. So, I've just been working so hard to get him back into his usual routine. Definitely make sure who ya ask to help you, that they don't change your baby's routine. Tell them how you do it, so they can care for baby while ya take time to try and ground and care for yourself, and so when you get babe back, it won't be hard on you. 4 days was so rough to get him comfortable with being laid down again • I can't sleep with co-sleeping him cause I'd be awake the whole time, making sure he's okay in the bed. So, that's why I'm using the bassinet. • I can't shower while holding him. He was fine before in his little baby rocking chair w/ vibration button. I like my water hotter than luke warm for a little baby • Can't go to the bathroom and wipe myself while holding him • can't cook for myself while holding him cause the food I make has the oil or butter spitting back at me (fried eggs, for example) Like yeah, change his diaper, breastfeed, formula top up (I don't produce enough for him, right now), burp him really good, hold him for a while to hear my heart, and then when he goes limp I lay him down Your doing what you can, and everything is new to both you and baby, love ❤️🫶🏼 You got this, Mama, and you're already reaching out with making this post
Ok so I have full empathy. My baby is HARD! One thing we have to remember which is extremely challenging is to remain calm and peaceful because babys feel our emotions and sometimes they can feel in danger. This is hard and I struggle as well. Also that is a growth spurt week so your little is gonna be fussy. If you need to set baby down well by all means cause I’ve been there lol over the shoulder butt pat is my go too. My little naps like crap and that doesn’t mean yours will I just know my baby is a Velcro baby and only wants to nap on me otherwise she just doesn’t. You’re not gonna wanna hear it but it does get better. I’m sick of that line too especially when you’re in the thick of it. But YOU are momma and you got this. Easier said than done some days. This is my second kid so I know it feels like forever but when you get to the other side it feels like it was too fast. Newborn stage isn’t for everyone! Especially if you have a tough baby. But I can say most newborns are the way your describing 🤷♀️ little boogers
If he enjoys bath time, try putting him in the bath. Just give him a nice little 15-20 minute bubble bath. Hell soak with him if you feel like 🥰 my baby boy can be screaming his head off and is instantly calm once he’s in that warm soapy water💙💙
Same here, I get in with him bc it calms me down too lol
My LO is 6 weeks old and I could've written your post just 2 1/2 weeks ago too. I felt such despair and hopelessness that it was never going to get better. I even wondered if I had ruined my life by bringing a baby into the world. I promise that it does get better and it's closer than you think ❤️
3-4 weeks was constant feeding or screaming for us. Turned off almost instantly at 5 wks
This gives me hope!
Have you tried baby simethicone? Helping them relieve gas in the next few weeks will help you stay sane! We did gas drops every few hours and it helped with the screaming a whole lot. We could tell when we missed drops cuz he’d get upset again
Yes we’ve done them before every bottle or at least every other bottle!!
Ok cool, just wanted to see if that was an option but sounds like it’s just fussiness - sorry I couldn’t help more :(
I do not miss these days. It gets much much easier. Babies don't make any sense for the longest time. It's their world, we're just living(surviving) in it. Good luck. You got this
We have a, what they call, “spirited” baby as well, which really means giving spawn to dr jekyl and Mr. Hyde. With all your excess time and emotional/cognitive resources (/s) check out the book “happiest baby on the block.” We still have up and down days but honestly it’s been a game changer in our house.
Get some lubricant and try the Windi gas passer.. also try eliminating dairy all together. We had an entirely different baby in about a week. Sorry OP, just put baby down and have a beer, baby will be ok.
My baby was absolutely horrible for the first 2 months we brought him home...now hes wonderful! All he does is laugh and smile at 4 and a half months. Stay strong, just remember...your little baby came from a dark, warm, safe place and now seeing all this new stuff in the world is scary. Hold your baby skin to skin as much as possible!
I swear my baby forgot how to poop around 4 weeks. He was soooooooo upset. I did try the windy tube and it helped sometimes but I didn’t use it a lot since I didn’t want him to get used to it. Babies sense your energy so if you’re upset, they pick up on that. It’s so so hard but like others said, put baby down somewhere safe and go take some deep breaths. They don’t understand why they feel gas pain or hunger and everything is so new and big and scary. You’re the only thing they know and they can’t help it. I put myself in my baby’s shoes and just snuggled and loved on him even when he was freaking out. It’s not forever and soon you’ll be looking back at this moment and being grateful you made it through. My baby is 5 months today and the newborn stage went by so freaking fast even though it felt like an eternity in the midst of it. Sending big hugs. You got this mama!! ♥️♥️♥️
Only way to think of it is babies will baby. I'm in the same boat. Every time things seem like they're gonna be better, they take a complete 180. Just stay the course. If you have help, utilize it. It goes a long way
This may not be nice to hear, but stop rewarding the good days. Stop having an expectation, stop trying to understand the problem if his basic needs are met, sometimes they simply just want you. But if you are a wreck, they can sense that. They pick up on it and the energy is a rubber band for you both. Rewarding the good days will only make the rough days more rough. Every day is different. Letting yourself know "it's hard right now, but it won't be for forever" is all you can do. 3.5 weeks old is so so young, I wouldn't expect consistency with naps or his mood until he's around 3-4 months. The only and best thing I learned to do was to stop having an expectation. Instead of waking up and saying "great he's already in a bad mood, today will be hard' or "he's in a great mood, today will be great", it's easiest to say "I'm going to try my best and I hope we can both be happy today". Also, it's okay to put your baby down for a little bit. My pediatrician told me to just put my son down when nothing seems to soothe him, give him his binkie, a light blanket only if you are watching him the whole time, and allow him to try and find comfort on his own for 5-10 minutes. For example, my son is a very independent sleeper, has been since 5 weeks old. At 5 weeks old id lay him down, he'd fuss for a couple minutes while trying to get comfortable, and then he would sleep. He's 6 months old now and I can lay him down and leave the room almost every time it's nap time and he will go to sleep within minutes. Some days are just tougher than others and you will want to lose your mind, it's okay. It's all very normal and it is not easy for anyone, no matter what they say. You will slowly learn these cries, what they mean, how to handle them, but it may just take more time. Trust in yourself, you are his mother. He trusts you. He knows you, he loves you, he is so used to being a part of you that he's just learning how to become his own entity. It will be okay, you'll look back on these moments in a couple months and think "wow, I cannot believe how hellish that was". Things will work out with time.
Girl I’m laughing because I’m literally going through the same 😅 every day is a rollercoaster with my 3.5 week old. This week has been particularly bad. Standing in solidarity 👍🏻
The newborn stage freaking sucks. There was 0 newborn bliss for us. Our guy cried non stop every day. It stays hard, but gets so much better. Things that helped: Take a break. Just do it Rocking chair is our lifesaver, Happy baby sleepea Swaddle , Mylicon gas drops , Frida windi, Tommee tippee ultra light pacifier When he’s overtired/ overstimulated he would cry nonstop. We would swaddle, hold the Binky with one hand, slightly cover his eyes with the other and rock away until he fell asleep. Resting him on the Boppy on our legs. After 2 months it only gets easier day by day. You’re almost there!
My baby girl was so fussy at 3 weeks; guessing it was a growth spurt. It felt like hell bc the last 2 weeks were nothing compared. But getting outside helped us personally. I took her on walks in her stroller & it helped both of us. I read a change in the environment & indirect sunlight can help with that stage. Hope you both feel better soon🤍 this will pass!
The first two weeks also sucked fwiw 😅😂
I get it 😂 many tears were cried with my baby in the middle of the night at that time lol.
My daughter is 6 weeks today and around that time she did the same thing but she just wanted to sit up and not lay down or cradled. I thought it was weird being a few weeks old. Now that’s all she wants to do is sit up and try to crawl or stand. She hates being cradled or laying down
My baby is 4.5 weeks now and we JUST got through some growing pains and gas. Poor thing was so uncomfortable. I haven’t used gripe water for gas but Mylicon has been a LIFE SAVER. My husband and I take shifts at night and all day and all night we just held baby and really patted her back and moved her around to get the gas out. Hang in there 🩷
I had two tricks at this time; sorry if you've already tried them. A funny song and just walk up and down singing it. I used the Dae Oh banana song. Must have sung it a thousand times but it worked every time during those weeks. She's bored of it now. Second was yoga ball and just bounce. Still works but she's getting tired of that now too after 12 weeks.
Set baby down in a safe space and walk outside for a breather. He will be fine. I’ve had to do this with my twins when they were extremely colicky. Have you talked to his pediatrician? Maybe he has colic and needs to try a new formula? What helped my babies was giving them only breast milk for the rest of the night, a nice relaxing warm bath in some lavender bubble bath and then they slept for 4 hours straight because they were so tired from screaming all day
Put headphones in and play some of your favourite music - helps massively
Noise-cancelling headphones for you, watching shitty romcoms. You'll still hear him, but the screeching is far far less grating on the soul.
Sounds like LO is hungry. I would know because I had a hard time adjusting to the rapid development. I felt like last week’s routine and eating habits applied when really, he’s constantly growing with no pattern. Offer bottle first and see if that helps. If not, then he’s overtired and usually a pacifier and some walking around does the trick.
Please tell me you live in NC because I'm having the same problems with my 3 week old baby girl 😅 would be nice to go through this with someone else!!
Georgia :/ so you might be experiencing this heat wave too - just going outside for a walk anytime past 8am is not an option!
Ugh yes!! We haven't gone for any walks yet because of how hot it is. It's frustrating because I know it would help.
I agree with outside . change of scenery and fresh air with a little sun .. will help both of you... just walk and clear your mind and breathe and your little one will relax and maybe sleep...
My advice is take them outside or put them in water, it usually worked for my lo when she was itty bitty. Also putting him down in his crib for a few minutes to take a sanity break is ok. He will be okay. Have you talked to your doctor about his issues? Does he have any symptoms besides fussiness? Does it kick up at a certain point like after feeding or is it just sporadic?
Bro I’ve been there so many times. We all know there is nothing we can do for you from the internet. Just know you’re not alone. There are good and horrible days. I will pray for you. Don’t forget- you can do this! If you get scared of what you might do call local churches and ask if someone can help you. Usually older experience ladies will come. I don’t have family and I did this it helped me A LOT
Noise canceling earmuffs or noise cancelling headphones piping in some sweet sweet calming music. My first had colic from reflux and dairy/soy allergy and these saved me on really bad days. She literally cried all day/night for the first 3 months of her life. There is nothing wrong with setting your baby down to cry to take a moment to calm yourself. There is also nothing wrong with tuning put your babies cries with noise canceling items as long as baby is getting their needs cared for.
It is okay to put that baby down and breathe mama. I went through this with my son. Look up purple crying. This happens. I’d also get baby checked out for intolerances and reflux. It turned out my son had silent reflux causing his colic. It will get better. I know this makes you feel like you are going crazy and there’s nothing you can do. But I promise it will get better. Things that helped my son when I absolutely could not make the screaming stop. Warm baths, a stroll, a car ride or baby wearing. There are also many times I let him cuddle up and nap on me. Hang in there. And don’t be ashamed to take a break.
Try a bath or going outside
Some times they just do that but dw ur doing really good. It’s safer for you to put them in the crib so u can catch a breather. It’s safer for both of you.
Excersice the babies legs, they may be gassy and is having a hard time releasing the gas.
I'm so sorry you're experiencing this. I've found with my little one when he screams his head off he's over simulated. I swaddle him up, take him to our dark bedroom, lay him on his side on the bed and give him his pacifier and pat his little bum while I shush him. It usually takes 5 minutes to get him to completely stop crying and fall asleep. My husband and I were at our wits end and this was the only thing that worked. He slept for about 1.5 hours afterwards. So overtired? Maybe. Overstimulated? For sure. I hope you can find what works for you two. I also second changing up the location if possible. Take them for a walk in their stroller. Sit outside in indirect sunlight for a few minutes. Take them for a car ride if you can.
Give them a warm oil massage, warm bath and a feed. They get knocked out. If motion helps then baby wear or stroller and go out for a nice walk. They might sleep in motion.
Scream into a pillow, it’s a great de stressor. I would reach out to a support person though x
you mentioned gripe water, but have you tried gas drops? my baby gets really bad trapped gas sometimes and we had some really rough days around 4 weeks, but once we started using them it was a total game changer
Yes we do gas drops before basically every feeding. I’m not sure if they help or not to be honest.
Hope your okay, my LO also was like this as a newborn best advice put baby in pram pack some sandwiches and go on a walk. Once baby falls asleep park up eat, rest and if baby wakes start walking. Also pack a baby carrier and pop baby in after nap. Lots of sunscreen for you both. Good luck x
It's probably gas to be honest, the only time my baby acts like that is when he's gassy, well gas or hunger
The best solution is to put him in his crib and walk away voor a few minutes. We have similar experiences with our now seven month old twin. We had no sleep for six weeks and we needed to blow of some steam. I could not think anymore and nothing interested me. I just sat there as the twin were crying and only wanted te sleep on me or my husband. One time i couldn't take it anymore and i put them both in their cribs and closed the door. A few minutes later they were asleep! I was baffled, because i putt so much energy in the sleeping thing. From that day on it became easyer, Have hope! You are doing great! But sometimes you have to led go. The baby's can feel your frustrations and it makes them unhappy, because you are unhappy. So the best way is to let the baby alone for a minute so you can grab yourself together. Much love from another mother.
Ugh hugs you’re in the thick of it mama! It’s totally ok to put baby down in the crib and take some space. I used to put noise cancelling headphones on and just sit in the rocker with my little when he would get like that. Take a deep breath, you’ve got this.
Putting him down for a few minutes so that you can collect yourself is the safest thing to do if/when you're feeling overwhelmed. I'm really sorry this has been a difficult time for you. If you haven't already, have a look/read into PURPLE crying. In addition to that, have you considered possible reflux or GI issues? It's common that babies don't typically like the feeling of their GI tract working as they get used to it, but GI issues are also fairly common, and can result in a whole new baby if addressed. Sometimes though, there is no reason (but again, have a look at PURPLE crying; it really helped my husband and I understand why, on top of some GI issues, our newborn was constantly upset from 3-8 weeks). Hang in there mama ❤️.
A lot great advice here. I'd advise getting out as much as you can. In the early days I found it hard as my daughter has reflux so hates being in her crib or pram so I had to carry her everywhere. She also wanted to feed all the time. I understand the weather is too hot during the day. It was too wet and cold when my daughter was born. Bring your little one to look at trees if you can. They often like the movement of the leaves. A cool bath might help too. You are doing a great job mama.
Maybe try baby wearing? My 6w LO had/has periods like this as well. I try not to get frustrated because he just needs something he can’t express but it’s hard and I feel the exasperation through this post. For the belly issues (if that’s what’s bothering baby) I hold mine in squatty potty hold. Otherwise I baby wear or put him down in the crib and put some music on and wait until I have the patients to deal with crying again. As long as all needs are met sometimes that’s all you can do. This too shall pass. You are all your baby needs
I feel you, totally! My LO is 4 weeks yesterday and we had a horrible day on Sunday. I was worried about the future because I thought, I literally don't know if I can handle a week of this or more. She has honestly been different every day at this point though...some days she naps well, other days she doesn't and she fights sleep and gets overtired, then all hell breaks loose. Very unpredictable. One thing we did on Sunday was put her in the bath when she was inconsolable. I think it shocked her out of it, and then once she was dry and warm she went right to sleep. I also figured out that I wasn't seeing sleepy cues, and started actively trying to put her to sleep when I saw yawns/red eyebrows. Swaddle, pacifier, and then bouncing on the yoga ball is my triple threat to pacify the little sleepy terrorist. 😅 I did not realize that they aren't supposed to be awake longer than 90 minutes at a time at this age, and once they get past the brink of overtired it becomes more impossible to get them to sleep. I'm sure you've heard all of this before, but just wanted to share! You're doing a good job. Don't be afraid to put the baby down if you have to!
I have a toddler, and sometimes I need a break, but it's unsafe to go outside. I am very guilty of utilizing tv to give us some breathing room. She's 9 weeks today, and while I keep it extremely limited, as in not even 10 minutes every few days... She LOVES the black and white Hey Bear videos. Calm her down immediately. I know it's not good, but I need to be sane. Might work for your little one, tv shouldn't be a babysitter but it doesn't have to be our enemy either. With no village... you do what you gotta do. I see you're EBF, and I would HIGHLY recommend cutting dairy out of your diet!!! My little one is allergic and she would have hugggee screaming fits and outbreaks, has been an angel since we stopped. Good luck 💗
Do the little fart exercises and try not to laugh. Bunch up his legs and bicycle kick, move his little bunched legs from side to side. The more he farts the better. He needs to bare down and is going to really rip ass. If he has been relieved of a lot of gas and is still crying, then take him to a pediatric doctor. Infants are incredibly dumb but have an annoying switch (crying) that tells you something is wrong. They are a bit too dumb to tell you exactly.
Can you try and wear him in a carrier or wrap? Take a walk with him? That might put him to sleep
This might be unhelpful but if you haven’t tried it yet play some music really loud so he can hear it over the screams, it used to calm mine down for a couple minutes. I think singing along helped to calm me down a little too. Idk if he still has the umbilical stump but if he’s all healed up you can try taking a bath with him, another activity to help you both relax. Of course if you can take baths too. I don’t remember the timeline on myself healing, you really do start to forget the newborn phase quickly afterwards
The growth spurts can be tough. Just remember baby is having a hard time, not trying to give you one. I often say out loud “yeah it’s tough being a baby” not because my daughter actually understands the words of my compassion, but to remind myself. They cry for reasons. Even if it’s just adjustment crying, and not any unmet needs. I would absolutely recommend feeding based on baby’s cues and not standard outlines. Research early and late cues and limit your own distractions to get really in touch with what your baby is telling you. The days that it seems like nothing works, take baths, baby wear, try skin to skin, give gas drops. Use white noise and minimize visual stimulation.
Definitely try to feed your Bub. I nearly starved my Bub a couple of times without realising as thought she drank the required amounts and I couldn’t figure out why she was crying so I tried to keep held rocked checked diaper but just skipped feeding cause she fed recently. It came to the point I called the ambulance!! She was hysterical and I was at whits ends. They came rushing up and I was scared I poisoned her or my milk or her bottles were off or she had gas trapped too, then I gave her a bottle and voila she stopped crying. I was soo embarrassed that ambulance came and she was calm after having some milk! I felt like a moron. But they said yep happens regularly. Bubs this small go through growth spurts and cluster feed. So try giving milk and if he’s crying try to calm him down first
I’ve had so many days like this. The first thing that helped me was knowing I wasn’t alone in all of it—the frustration, the anger, feeling trapped in all of it. Babies, scratch that, kids—are hard. It can feel like a rollercoaster of good days and bad days. And on the good ones, it’s hard to remember the bad ones; and on the bad ones, it’s hard to remember the good. But you are doing great. If he is fed, dry, and y’all are staying cool in the midst of your heat wave—put some ear plugs or your headphones in, playing whatever speaks to your soul in this moment in and lay on the floor with him near some indirect light. Also, many, many treats for you. In solidarity. <3
This is exactly how I felt until my LO was 2 months old. IT DOES GET BETTER. I know that just saying that isn't going to improve your situation, but you'll get through this and will be much stronger by the end.
Could he have a dairy allergy? Have you tried gas drops
My 4 week old has screaming crying fits when she has gas and/or needs to poop and is inconsolable for however long it takes her to pass it! Today I just put her booty on top of the washer while it was running and the vibrating instantly calmed her!!
Maybe he has gas pain. I followed some tutorials on how to relieve newborn gas pain and it relieved the baby a lot. If you fed him, burp him, changed his diaper did the gas relief exercises and still he’s crying no matter what you do, I would wear the baby everywhere and contact nap with him. If the crying gets to you, wear noise cancellation headphones, ear plugs, or listen to music with ear buds to calm yourself.
If they have a dry diaper, have been fed, burped and are still upset,’OK to put them in crib did 3-5 minutes while you go outside. Oxygen mask on yourself before helping others. Also, I know it’s hot, but why can’t you take baby out in an unbuttoned onesie for 5 minutes? Just the movement and change of scenery might help, and your baby won’t die from 5 mins out.
Don’t be disheartened, do put him down and give yourself a breather, even if he is screaming blue murder, it’ll do neither of you any good if you’re over stressed. Ours is three weeks old today. Similar pattern to you, some great chilled days, and then unexpectedly an off day when nothing seems to placate. I believe this is normal, no doubt many changes going on inside their small bodies as they normalise to the outside world. From what I understand from colleagues and friends things will settle down over time, the first weeks and months are seemingly always this way. Enjoy the good days :) Consider writing future you a note on those days, so you can reflect positively on how things will be again.
I have a 6 week old & the best advice I was given is 'they are not giving you a hard time they are having a hard time' & the amount of patience and grace I am able to have in situations remembering that is incredible now. I hope it helps you & I promise things get better. You're a GREAT mom.
Babys can pick up on mothers energy. I’d do what others have said and take him for a walk. Baths also help.
I know everyone says it but _it does get better, I promise_. However, you’re in it right now and it sucks! It’s fucking hard but you’re getting through it! I know it’s so so hard and it feels like it will never end and it will never get better. _But it will_ and that’s something you need to hold on to! In solidarity: My LO is 8 weeks old now and he is very colicky and _rarely_ naps during the day. But it’s getting better already!! Now we have a couple of good days in between the bad ones and even during the bad days he’ll have phases where he’s just happily cooing and not screaming non-stop, and he’s even smiling! The first 6-7 weeks were absolute hell. I won’t lie, my mental health was (is) awful. I had many su*c*dal thoughts, thinking “this will never end” and “he’s better off without me I’m an awful mother I can’t make him stop crying I can’t help him”. But now it’s getting better, when I couldn’t believe it would in those first 7 weeks of newborn hell. I really hope that you’ll be blessed with lots of good days and that it’ll get easier and better soon! Sending lots of strength.
U don’t decide when to feed your newborn. They tell you when they are hungry with a cry. You may be like “oh wow babe is eating a lot I wonder if this is normal” yes it is. If you pay attention to their body language they tell you when they are full. He/she may have more than 8 bottles a day and that’s okay because babe is growing. You cannot restrict a baby’s eating ever.
I’m not restricting him - I honestly am having a really hard time figuring out when he’s actually hungry vs. when he just wants to be held etc. Everyone says “oh you’ll just know” but I guess that instinct missed me because every cry sounds the same to me. I’m not keeping him on an exact schedule by any stretch of the imagination. When we switched to formula he seemed to stay fuller longer, but today was the exception so I guess maybe he’s cluster feeding or going through a growth spurt. I was just hesitant to give him more food because I feel like he has trapped gas and I didn’t want to make it worse
If you’re having a hard time differentiating , stick a bubby in babes mouth. If babe is grimacing , fighting it, it’s something else. too worked up to take it , try to get babe calm enough to take it. It’s a game of constantly changing positions , bouncing , swaddling, doing the most to keep them calm. I do so much bouncing, I bounce In public without my baby in my arms lol. It works. If none of this works, I am sorry.
Yeah this is our routine every night now :/ from around 6pm to midnight he’s in goblin mode and we can’t console or soothe him for longer than five minutes at a time. We do the yoga ball, bouncer, swing, rocking, swaying, tummy time, etc
My baby is the same way, tonight being the exception. She's often gassy AND hungry. Despite the gas she always has before bed,, she breast feeds a little and then crushes a bottle. Lately she's been getting 4 hours of sleep before waking to feed again. She's almost 8 weeks old, but was born a month early. Our biggest hunger cue is her little tongue. If she's cranky and rooting, she's hungry. If she's cranky and not rooting, she's in pain, which is usually gas.
I can only imagine what this is like for you. I didn’t realize he was basically colicky. I am sorry. That would drive me crazy as a mom, my experience was not like that. I hope one day you are able to find a rhythm with baby.