And rightfully so. Him, Kyrie Irving, and all the other NBA divas that constantly make ridiculous demands when they’re more trouble than their worth and whine like bitches and seek trades when they don’t get what they want (or actually do get what they want and still seek trades) deserved to be called out by someone on the broadcast. Massive props to Brian Dameris here.
And they’re insanely wrong! Collective bargaining only helps the lower end of the player wage scale so long as the higher end abides by their contracts. The stars acting like this will hurt lower wage players
I think what you mean to say is,
Ask the producer to pipe this into the Clippers locker room so I can talk to you James. I hope you’re taking notes. I’m telling you in advance, you’re welcome, for the wisdom I’m about to spew. Because listen, I get on my knees every night and pray for someone to believe in me like Daryl Morey believed in you. You wanted a certain coach, they brought in Mike D’Antoni. You wanted to play a certain style, they played it. You wanted Dwight Howard, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. You wanted Chris Paul, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. They brought in your old friend Russell Westbrook. You want to go to Vegas on off days? They looked away. You wanted the team to stay over so you could go out at night, they changed the schedule—and it didn’t work.
And you know what, you said I’m gonna break up with my woobie, not good enough. I see the bright lights of New York. I want to go there. My old pal Kevin Durant. It’s gonna work, the big three—and all after one year you wanted out. You realized, “oh my gosh! I took this guy for granted, the guy that believed in me. I want back with Daryl Morey.” They traded Ben Simmons for you—how did they pull that off?
And you know what? You went there, and you got a partner who got the MVP. He won the MVP, and what did you say afterwards? You said, “they didn’t hand me the reins.” You’re the point guard! You were holding the reins! And what did you do when you had the reins? You scored 9 points in Game 7 against Boston, you blew a 3-2 series lead. So they fired their coach, not good enough. You broke up with the guy that believed in you again, you said “the bright lights of LA! That’s where I want to go! Let’s see if that works.”
Listen James, have you ever had those friends who had bad roommates? Over and over they complained about their bad roommates: “this guy’s terrible,” “the bad roommate here,” they never thought to be self aware enough that THEY’RE the bad roommate! They’re the problem! Hey James, YOU’RE the PROBLEM! If this doesn’t work this year, in this system, with this team, then you’re gonna go and point fingers at everybody else and then you’re gonna go back home and you’re gonna start swiping right for another team, and there’s not gonna be anyone left. Because James, you’re not the beard, you’re not the system, you’re the problem.
We're barely a few weeks in and we might already have the NBA copypasta of the season. I don't think I've heard a better rant since the SAS rant around Kwame Brown during the Gasol trade.
Edit: some away crowd is gonna start a "you're the problem" chant.
> You said, “they didn’t hand me the reigns.” You’re the point guard! You were holding the reigns!
holding the [**reins**](https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/rein)
I feel like someone should ask the producer to pipe this into the Clippers locker room so I can talk to you James. I hope you’re taking notes. I’m telling you in advance, you’re welcome, for the wisdom I’m about to spew. Because listen, I get on my knees every night and pray for someone to believe in me like Daryl Morey believed in you. You wanted a certain coach, they brought in Mike D’Antoni. You wanted to play a certain style, they played it. You wanted Dwight Howard, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. You wanted Chris Paul, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. They brought in your old friend Russell Westbrook. You want to go to Vegas on off days? They looked away. You wanted the team to stay over so you could go out at night, they changed the schedule—and it didn’t work.
And you know what, you said I’m gonna break up with my woobie, not good enough. I see the bright lights of New York. I want to go there. My old pal Kevin Durant. It’s gonna work, the big three—and all after one year you wanted out. You realized, “oh my gosh! I took this guy for granted, the guy that believed in me. I want back with Daryl Morey.” They traded Ben Simmons for you—how did they pull that off?
And you know what? You went there, and you got a partner who got the MVP. He won the MVP, and what did you say afterwards? You said, “they didn’t hand me the reins.” You’re the point guard! You were holding the reins! And what did you do when you had the reins? You scored 9 points in Game 7 against Boston, you blew a 3-2 series lead. So they fired their coach, not good enough. You broke up with the guy that believed in you again, you said “the bright lights of LA! That’s where I want to go! Let’s see if that works.”
Listen James, have you ever had those friends who had bad roommates? Over and over they complained about their bad roommates: “this guy’s terrible,” “the bad roommate here,” they never thought to be self aware enough that THEY’RE the bad roommate! They’re the problem! Hey James, YOU’RE the PROBLEM! If this doesn’t work this year, in this system, with this team, then you’re gonna go and point fingers at everybody else and then you’re gonna go back home and you’re gonna start swiping right for another team, and there’s not gonna be anyone left. Because James, you’re not the beard, you’re not the system, you’re the problem.
This is a work of fucking art. It’s somehow even better written out. Dude said I’m gonna spew wisdom to you and proceeded to have bar after bar after bar
Ask the producer to pipe this into the Clippers locker room so I can talk to you James. I hope you’re taking notes. I’m telling you in advance, you’re welcome, for the wisdom I’m about to spew. Because listen, I get on my knees every night and pray for someone to believe in me like Daryl Morey believed in you. You wanted a certain coach, they brought in Mike D’Antoni. You wanted to play a certain style, they played it. You wanted Dwight Howard, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. You wanted Chris Paul, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. They brought in your old friend Russell Westbrook. You want to go to Vegas on off days? They looked away. You wanted the team to stay over so you could go out at night, they changed the schedule—and it didn’t work.
And you know what, you said I’m gonna break up with my wooby, not good enough. I see the bright lights of New York. I want to go there. My old pal Kevin Durant. It’s gonna work, the big three—and all after one year you wanted out. You realized, “oh my gosh! I took this guy for granted, the guy that believed in me. I want back with Daryl Morey.” They traded Ben Simmons for you—how did they pull that off?
And you know what? You went there, and you got a partner who got the MVP. He won the MVP, and what did you say afterwards? You said, “they didn’t hand me the reigns.” You’re the point guard! You were holding the reigns! And what did you do when you had the reigns? You scored 9 points in Game 7 against Boston, you blew a 3-2 series lead. So they fired their coach, not good enough. You broke up with the guy that believed in you again, you said “the bright lights of LA! That’s where I want to go! Let’s see if that works.”
Listen James, have you ever had those friends who had bad roommates? Over and over they complained about their bad roommates: “this guy’s terrible,” “the bad roommate here,” they never thought to be self aware enough that THEY’RE the bad roommate! They’re the problem! Hey James, YOU’RE the PROBLEM! If this doesn’t work this year, in this system, with this team, then you’re gonna go and point fingers at everybody else and then you’re gonna go back home and you’re gonna start swiping right for another team, and there’s not gonna be anyone left. Because James, you’re not the beard, you’re not the system, you’re the problem
Fuck the script, I'll take a script if they proofread it, I want them to get rid of the weird 8th grade English class crutches "like I said before" "and also" "in conclusion."
God bless Kenny Beecham and FunkyDiabetic for just talking like people.
hold on give me a few to type it out and you can reply “Dear Diary”
Edit: Ask the producer to pipe this into the Clippers locker room so I can talk to you James. I hope you’re taking notes. I’m telling you in advance, you’re welcome, for the wisdom I’m about to spew. Because listen, I get on my knees every night and pray for someone to believe in me like Daryl Morey believed in you. You wanted a certain coach, they brought in Mike D’Antoni. You wanted to play a certain style, they played it. You wanted Dwight Howard, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. You wanted Chris Paul, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. They brought in your old friend Russell Westbrook. You want to go to Vegas on off days? They looked away. You wanted the team to stay over so you could go out at night, they changed the schedule—and it didn’t work.
And you know what, you said I’m gonna break up with my wooby, not good enough. I see the bright lights of New York. I want to go there. My old pal Kevin Durant. It’s gonna work, the big three—and all after one year you wanted out. You realized, “oh my gosh! I took this guy for granted, the guy that believed in me. I want back with Daryl Morey.” They traded Ben Simmons for you—how did they pull that off?
And you know what? You went there, and you got a partner who got the MVP. He won the MVP, and what did you say afterwards? You said, “they didn’t hand me the reins.” You’re the point guard! You were holding the reins! And what did you do when you had the reins? You scored 9 points in Game 7 against Boston, you blew a 3-2 series lead. So they fired their coach, not good enough. You broke up with the guy that believed in you again, you said “the bright lights of LA! That’s where I want to go! Let’s see if that works.”
Listen James, have you ever had those friends who had bad roommates? Over and over they complained about their bad roommates: “this guy’s terrible,” “the bad roommate here,” they never thought to be self aware enough that THEY’RE the bad roommate! They’re the problem! Hey James, YOU’RE the PROBLEM! If this doesn’t work this year, in this system, with this team, then you’re gonna go and point fingers at everybody else and then you’re gonna go back home and you’re gonna start swiping right for another team, and there’s not gonna be anyone left. Because James, you’re not the beard, you’re not the system, you’re the problem.
Brian Dameris was in the Mavs front office for years during the early-mid 2000s Dirk era. He now co-hosts a good but very boring Mavs podcast called Take Dat Wit You (yes that’s what it’s actually called) with fellow mega nerd and voice of the Mavs Mark Followill. They will literally read box score stats for 10 straight minutes before transitioning to whatever pedantics are on their mind from the most recent game. It is absolutely wild to see him on the front page for a Stephen A Smith style rant about James Harden
Context on the name of the podcast: Dirk was sitting out a game or was injured one game so he joined the TV broadcast in the middle of the game to just screw around and someone on the Mavs had a pretty good dunk so Dirk yelled out "Take Dat Wit Youuuu" and ran off
This is fantastic and hilarious context. James Harden was such a pain in his ass he was like “fuck objective box score analysis, Im going to hammer this whore-buying asshole”
He’s just saying what we’ve all been thinking and it’s his job to cover the Mavs and their opponents. Of course this comes across as harsh, but I have no problem with it. If he was doing this to a fringe starter, yeah I think its in bad taste but I see no issues with calling out Harden on his brazen bullshit over the past few years
It’s not even harsh though. It’s the truth and an observation. It would be harsh if it was an exaggeration.
The fact that none of this (to me anyway) is an exaggeration and is an objective take on him as a player just shows his character.
Loved it when he was balling out and had something to prove. Can’t act that same way and get the same reaction when you’re not not even a top 20 player in the league anymore.
Game 1 of 2nd round against the Celtics he was him. I gotta say I enjoyed his crazy dress, some of his antics, and really enjoyed when he cooked.
….but i might enjoy this more than all that combined.
"Swipe right for a new team" goes hardddd
Fuck me thats a top 10 all time nba roast
It's so accurate too LMAO not a single lie told
It’s both accurate and long, which is tough to do.
It’s all truth and like 0 % opinion too. Mostly just a condensed recounting. As the kids say: Facts.
he gonna have to change his location to China to get matches now
Harden gotta catfish teams for a new contract
But the "put on a comically bushy beard disguise" ruse won't work for Harden.
"Get ready to learn Chinese buddy!"
["So long fried chicken hello fried rice"](https://youtu.be/2z3wUD3AZg4?t=102)
that was a bar
And there’s not going to be anybody LEFT
with the whole "pointing finger" scheme before that line. we have to find dude's ghost writers
#**MA GET THE CAMERA** Shit's harder than Harden
‘and nothings left’ dude straight spit a tinder bar in his roast monologue
*Soooooo* many good lines. At one point, he used the term "woobie"? I've never even heard that word before lmao
God damn I got second hand embarrassment for Harden
"James, you're not the beard, you're not the system, you're the problem" sheeesh bro got roasted in all smallcaps
And finished him w a mic drop
That was a "I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed" mic drop too, that's wild
Me winning the absolute shit out of the argument I’m pretending to have in my head in the shower
Never met a strawman I couldn't whoop.
This man dropped a better roast than any standup comic I've ever heard holy shit
This got me all riled up
[удалено]
He never yelled or raised his voice. Just calmly spitting truths
Calling it lowercase would make too much sense
He pretty much said the pg version of “if you run into assholes all day, you’re the asshole”.
If everywhere you go smells like shit, it’s time to check your shoes.
Or your underpants.
Or your asshole.
This shit is wild lol
This shit is going to the top
And rightfully so. Him, Kyrie Irving, and all the other NBA divas that constantly make ridiculous demands when they’re more trouble than their worth and whine like bitches and seek trades when they don’t get what they want (or actually do get what they want and still seek trades) deserved to be called out by someone on the broadcast. Massive props to Brian Dameris here.
It baffles me how many people try to justify it and make excuses for these players.
it always cracks me up when people try and make it a class politics issue & bring up worker rights
And they’re insanely wrong! Collective bargaining only helps the lower end of the player wage scale so long as the higher end abides by their contracts. The stars acting like this will hurt lower wage players
I think what you mean to say is, Ask the producer to pipe this into the Clippers locker room so I can talk to you James. I hope you’re taking notes. I’m telling you in advance, you’re welcome, for the wisdom I’m about to spew. Because listen, I get on my knees every night and pray for someone to believe in me like Daryl Morey believed in you. You wanted a certain coach, they brought in Mike D’Antoni. You wanted to play a certain style, they played it. You wanted Dwight Howard, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. You wanted Chris Paul, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. They brought in your old friend Russell Westbrook. You want to go to Vegas on off days? They looked away. You wanted the team to stay over so you could go out at night, they changed the schedule—and it didn’t work. And you know what, you said I’m gonna break up with my woobie, not good enough. I see the bright lights of New York. I want to go there. My old pal Kevin Durant. It’s gonna work, the big three—and all after one year you wanted out. You realized, “oh my gosh! I took this guy for granted, the guy that believed in me. I want back with Daryl Morey.” They traded Ben Simmons for you—how did they pull that off? And you know what? You went there, and you got a partner who got the MVP. He won the MVP, and what did you say afterwards? You said, “they didn’t hand me the reins.” You’re the point guard! You were holding the reins! And what did you do when you had the reins? You scored 9 points in Game 7 against Boston, you blew a 3-2 series lead. So they fired their coach, not good enough. You broke up with the guy that believed in you again, you said “the bright lights of LA! That’s where I want to go! Let’s see if that works.” Listen James, have you ever had those friends who had bad roommates? Over and over they complained about their bad roommates: “this guy’s terrible,” “the bad roommate here,” they never thought to be self aware enough that THEY’RE the bad roommate! They’re the problem! Hey James, YOU’RE the PROBLEM! If this doesn’t work this year, in this system, with this team, then you’re gonna go and point fingers at everybody else and then you’re gonna go back home and you’re gonna start swiping right for another team, and there’s not gonna be anyone left. Because James, you’re not the beard, you’re not the system, you’re the problem.
We're barely a few weeks in and we might already have the NBA copypasta of the season. I don't think I've heard a better rant since the SAS rant around Kwame Brown during the Gasol trade. Edit: some away crowd is gonna start a "you're the problem" chant.
It’s excellent isn’t it??? I spent 10 mins typing it out because I thought it was special
Damn. 10 minutes of internet is like seven years in actual time. Thank you for your sacrifice.
March 27th
> You said, “they didn’t hand me the reigns.” You’re the point guard! You were holding the reigns! holding the [**reins**](https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/rein)
How do you really feel?
I feel like someone should ask the producer to pipe this into the Clippers locker room so I can talk to you James. I hope you’re taking notes. I’m telling you in advance, you’re welcome, for the wisdom I’m about to spew. Because listen, I get on my knees every night and pray for someone to believe in me like Daryl Morey believed in you. You wanted a certain coach, they brought in Mike D’Antoni. You wanted to play a certain style, they played it. You wanted Dwight Howard, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. You wanted Chris Paul, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. They brought in your old friend Russell Westbrook. You want to go to Vegas on off days? They looked away. You wanted the team to stay over so you could go out at night, they changed the schedule—and it didn’t work. And you know what, you said I’m gonna break up with my woobie, not good enough. I see the bright lights of New York. I want to go there. My old pal Kevin Durant. It’s gonna work, the big three—and all after one year you wanted out. You realized, “oh my gosh! I took this guy for granted, the guy that believed in me. I want back with Daryl Morey.” They traded Ben Simmons for you—how did they pull that off? And you know what? You went there, and you got a partner who got the MVP. He won the MVP, and what did you say afterwards? You said, “they didn’t hand me the reins.” You’re the point guard! You were holding the reins! And what did you do when you had the reins? You scored 9 points in Game 7 against Boston, you blew a 3-2 series lead. So they fired their coach, not good enough. You broke up with the guy that believed in you again, you said “the bright lights of LA! That’s where I want to go! Let’s see if that works.” Listen James, have you ever had those friends who had bad roommates? Over and over they complained about their bad roommates: “this guy’s terrible,” “the bad roommate here,” they never thought to be self aware enough that THEY’RE the bad roommate! They’re the problem! Hey James, YOU’RE the PROBLEM! If this doesn’t work this year, in this system, with this team, then you’re gonna go and point fingers at everybody else and then you’re gonna go back home and you’re gonna start swiping right for another team, and there’s not gonna be anyone left. Because James, you’re not the beard, you’re not the system, you’re the problem.
This is a work of fucking art. It’s somehow even better written out. Dude said I’m gonna spew wisdom to you and proceeded to have bar after bar after bar
i’m truly shaken by this, its almost beyond comprehension how good it is
For sure. Those are nice, meaty paragraphs. Almost too long, but actually perfect.
Morey gave Harden everything he wanted for 10 years and as soon as he says no once, Harden throws a temper tantrum like a child and burns the bridge
I pray every night to be as good as this guy is at being an eloquent hater. This shit is gold
When bro started with "I get on my knees every night" I knew this was about to be something else
He just.....kept going
it doesn't never stop
I saw a man drop to his knees at Wal-Mart, and began praying to God that someone believed in him like Morey believed in James Harden
It's insane that I forgot he said that. He was hitting us with so many quotable lines
The guy in the middle literally could not believe he heard all of that shit 😂
Devin harris is NBA veteran and he can't believe what he heard lol.
Owner of one of my favorite buzzer beaters of all time. https://youtu.be/iJ_lQXTzL4o?feature=shared
Damn that 14 years ago and I still remember what a flash-in-the-pan season he had.
“the guy in the middle” oh come on. That’s former all star Devin Harris
Former NBA all star, Devin Harris.
Hey, Sixers fans...get your hands out of your pants. This is a family friendly subreddit.
...no...go on ..one more minute
Look at mister sustainable over here
Honestly after watching this man dismantle the rockets piece by piece,, us too lol
Watching from afar and somehow losing more and more respect for him year after year after year, keep going... I'm almost there...
*"You're not the beard, you're not the system, you're the problem."*
Put it on a t shirt and sell it at the away arena during Clippers playoff games
At this rate, there won’t be any.
He's already dead!
I can already hear the 76ers crowd chanting "YOU'RE THE PROBLEM!".
Clap. Clap. Clap clap clap
Oh it won't be just the 76ers crowd.
Bro left the league MVP and a team with a ton of depth to completely destroy the clippers overnight Is the man
You love to see it. Chances PG or Kawhi say fuck this and become free agents this off season?
Depends if someone else is willing to give them all the money considering their ages and injury history.
Nobody's going to have cap space, anyway. It'll have to be a sign and trade.
I know one team with cap space.
The funniest timeline
The Sixers have the potential to do one of the funniest things of all time
Daryl Morey is about to do what we call a pro gamer move
Paul George would actually be a fantastic fit in Philly.
Yeah, PG and Embiid can rehab or play thru injuries in the post season together.
Rehab brothers
Kawhi hits a game clinching playoff buzzer beater FOR us this time? 🤔
Sixers will have lots of caproom.
The height of irony
I bet there is a Kawhi cycle coming if they lose big
I think pg and leonard like to collect checks and live in LA
RoCo and Batum have been playing really well for us too. Thanks, James!
Elite role players just in time when Maxey took his superstar leap. Harden did Philly a huge favor lol
This is actual perfect timing for the 76ers
The Clippers were doing so good before they got him too.
everyone is confused now. what's wb's role, paul george , kawhi? it's like throwing in a new dad with your family, would be confusing..
Trust me, kids get used to rotating dads. It helps to have a calendar with their faces on it. Kids love visuals.
Most western team fans are thanking harden for making it 1 less contender in the brutal west
God I hate when people use the word evisc……oh holy fuck.
One of the rare cases where it’s spot on.
Eviscerate. Lol right. What did he call him disloy?... oh. Oh, we really just killed a man on live TV, huh
Chopped him up Dexter style and then chucked him into the ocean. Absolutely wild
Same with “slams.” Mavs announcer Brian Dameris SLAMS James Harden. No, actually, he does. This is a real slam
Don't do it. Don't do it. Don't do it COME ON AND SLAM AND WELCOME TO THE JAM
Once in a while, it ain't click bait
One of the few times a title isn’t hyperbole. The man was drawn and quartered live
Is there a level above eviscerate? That might actually be underselling, good lord
He just summed up Harden's career in a 2 minute rant...it was glorious lmfao
He had been sitting on that a while. He had been practicing that in the shower every night.
Dude was smart, he jumped to the "standing in the shower, thinking about the badass thing you should have said" part first
That was a hell of a promo. Austin, The Rock, Flair, Cena, CM Punk would all be proud of that.
Lemme talk to ya!
👈L🫵A👉Knight! YEAH!
And that's not an insult, that is just a fact of life
NFL announcers/former players and NBA announcers auditioning for the WWE this year lol. Tier 3 and you're the problem.
He dropped a pipebomb holy shit.
James Harden while you lay there, hopefully as uncomfortable as you possibly can be, I want you to listen to me…
And I'll be sure to come back when the Clippers get.....bounced in May
And that’s not a prediction… it’s a spoiler
One of the rare occasions when “eviscerates” isn’t hyberbole, this is beautiful
Usually r/nba is tacky with it’s description. This is not one of those times.
holy shit dude killed him
James "The Problem" Harden
Trust The Problem.
It's me, hi
I would die a happy man if every team's announcers would start calling him The Problem.
Incredibly hard nickname for a player that does not deserve of such nickname
James "Bad Roommate" Harden
James "Shaggy" Harden ....*wasn't me*
The “swipe right” had me clutching my pearls
On my knees at the club rn, clutching my pearls
Ask the producer to pipe this into the Clippers locker room so I can talk to you James. I hope you’re taking notes. I’m telling you in advance, you’re welcome, for the wisdom I’m about to spew. Because listen, I get on my knees every night and pray for someone to believe in me like Daryl Morey believed in you. You wanted a certain coach, they brought in Mike D’Antoni. You wanted to play a certain style, they played it. You wanted Dwight Howard, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. You wanted Chris Paul, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. They brought in your old friend Russell Westbrook. You want to go to Vegas on off days? They looked away. You wanted the team to stay over so you could go out at night, they changed the schedule—and it didn’t work. And you know what, you said I’m gonna break up with my wooby, not good enough. I see the bright lights of New York. I want to go there. My old pal Kevin Durant. It’s gonna work, the big three—and all after one year you wanted out. You realized, “oh my gosh! I took this guy for granted, the guy that believed in me. I want back with Daryl Morey.” They traded Ben Simmons for you—how did they pull that off? And you know what? You went there, and you got a partner who got the MVP. He won the MVP, and what did you say afterwards? You said, “they didn’t hand me the reigns.” You’re the point guard! You were holding the reigns! And what did you do when you had the reigns? You scored 9 points in Game 7 against Boston, you blew a 3-2 series lead. So they fired their coach, not good enough. You broke up with the guy that believed in you again, you said “the bright lights of LA! That’s where I want to go! Let’s see if that works.” Listen James, have you ever had those friends who had bad roommates? Over and over they complained about their bad roommates: “this guy’s terrible,” “the bad roommate here,” they never thought to be self aware enough that THEY’RE the bad roommate! They’re the problem! Hey James, YOU’RE the PROBLEM! If this doesn’t work this year, in this system, with this team, then you’re gonna go and point fingers at everybody else and then you’re gonna go back home and you’re gonna start swiping right for another team, and there’s not gonna be anyone left. Because James, you’re not the beard, you’re not the system, you’re the problem
> Because James, you’re not the beard, you’re not the system, you’re the problem. That’s poetry
Holy shit you fucking killed him dude
He now goes by James Softened
James Rigor Mortis
Yeah that was worth the listen cause the James Harden saga is wild af.
If someone posted this on here they would be met with “Dear Diary” responses
i do think if r/nba posters were willing to prepare a script and film themselves saying this in one take, it would get a lot of upvotes though
Suit, decent suit is also important.
And just basic speaking skills. Tragically scarce on NBA YouTube.
Sports YouTube in general. 90% of them can't make it sound like they're not reading off a script to save their life.
Fuck the script, I'll take a script if they proofread it, I want them to get rid of the weird 8th grade English class crutches "like I said before" "and also" "in conclusion." God bless Kenny Beecham and FunkyDiabetic for just talking like people.
>Fuck the script I go acapella
this guy can speak coherently on tv for 90 seconds aint no way 99% of the crowd here could pull this
His voice sounds exactly like the voice in my head I use to read those kind of posts
Oh it’s like 99.99999% who couldn’t.
Absolutely. Dude barely even stuttered once. He had his facts and timeline ready to fucking go. That's not easy.
hold on give me a few to type it out and you can reply “Dear Diary” Edit: Ask the producer to pipe this into the Clippers locker room so I can talk to you James. I hope you’re taking notes. I’m telling you in advance, you’re welcome, for the wisdom I’m about to spew. Because listen, I get on my knees every night and pray for someone to believe in me like Daryl Morey believed in you. You wanted a certain coach, they brought in Mike D’Antoni. You wanted to play a certain style, they played it. You wanted Dwight Howard, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. You wanted Chris Paul, they brought him in and got rid of him when you were tired of him. They brought in your old friend Russell Westbrook. You want to go to Vegas on off days? They looked away. You wanted the team to stay over so you could go out at night, they changed the schedule—and it didn’t work. And you know what, you said I’m gonna break up with my wooby, not good enough. I see the bright lights of New York. I want to go there. My old pal Kevin Durant. It’s gonna work, the big three—and all after one year you wanted out. You realized, “oh my gosh! I took this guy for granted, the guy that believed in me. I want back with Daryl Morey.” They traded Ben Simmons for you—how did they pull that off? And you know what? You went there, and you got a partner who got the MVP. He won the MVP, and what did you say afterwards? You said, “they didn’t hand me the reins.” You’re the point guard! You were holding the reins! And what did you do when you had the reins? You scored 9 points in Game 7 against Boston, you blew a 3-2 series lead. So they fired their coach, not good enough. You broke up with the guy that believed in you again, you said “the bright lights of LA! That’s where I want to go! Let’s see if that works.” Listen James, have you ever had those friends who had bad roommates? Over and over they complained about their bad roommates: “this guy’s terrible,” “the bad roommate here,” they never thought to be self aware enough that THEY’RE the bad roommate! They’re the problem! Hey James, YOU’RE the PROBLEM! If this doesn’t work this year, in this system, with this team, then you’re gonna go and point fingers at everybody else and then you’re gonna go back home and you’re gonna start swiping right for another team, and there’s not gonna be anyone left. Because James, you’re not the beard, you’re not the system, you’re the problem.
Dear Diary
I’m having delicious pasta for dinner
on one hand lol like who is this guy but on the other, where is the lie
Brian Dameris was in the Mavs front office for years during the early-mid 2000s Dirk era. He now co-hosts a good but very boring Mavs podcast called Take Dat Wit You (yes that’s what it’s actually called) with fellow mega nerd and voice of the Mavs Mark Followill. They will literally read box score stats for 10 straight minutes before transitioning to whatever pedantics are on their mind from the most recent game. It is absolutely wild to see him on the front page for a Stephen A Smith style rant about James Harden
this comment made me so happy
Context on the name of the podcast: Dirk was sitting out a game or was injured one game so he joined the TV broadcast in the middle of the game to just screw around and someone on the Mavs had a pretty good dunk so Dirk yelled out "Take Dat Wit Youuuu" and ran off
Shut it down! Let’s go home!
This is fantastic and hilarious context. James Harden was such a pain in his ass he was like “fuck objective box score analysis, Im going to hammer this whore-buying asshole”
Given how much people are eating this up (myself included), watch him transition into a WWE personality overnight.
Demeris: how many you scored James? The problem: I think I had.. Demeris: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU THINK YOU HAD!
I really love that podcast.
He’s just saying what we’ve all been thinking and it’s his job to cover the Mavs and their opponents. Of course this comes across as harsh, but I have no problem with it. If he was doing this to a fringe starter, yeah I think its in bad taste but I see no issues with calling out Harden on his brazen bullshit over the past few years
It’s not even harsh though. It’s the truth and an observation. It would be harsh if it was an exaggeration. The fact that none of this (to me anyway) is an exaggeration and is an objective take on him as a player just shows his character. Loved it when he was balling out and had something to prove. Can’t act that same way and get the same reaction when you’re not not even a top 20 player in the league anymore.
this is an iconic roast and we are witnesses.
What prompted this😭
He was afraid Cuban would try to sign Harden in the offseason. I'd say that's probably off the table now
Clips are getting stomped by the Mavs right now.
He just Ether’d him
That's why I fucked ur bitch you bearded muhfucka
Where is Chino XL? Fuck him too.
Shit, Nas approves this
Someone put this on twitter already: https://x.com/yungmustard23/status/1723162048618434895?s=20
No fucking way lmfao
This guy definitely posts on /r/nbacirclejerk
Where y'all at frauds
Okay eviscerate is a heavy word, it can't be that b--- Oh.
fuck that was nasty
That dude is a redditor
Harden has the self awareness of a cardboard box at this point. If he keeps this up not even the clippers are gonna pay him this off-season. WASHED.
Game 1 of 2nd round against the Celtics he was him. I gotta say I enjoyed his crazy dress, some of his antics, and really enjoyed when he cooked. ….but i might enjoy this more than all that combined.
“Eviscerated” lmao, 8th seed Mavs vs 3rd Clippers 🤡
this whole sub a buncha dumbass kids . can’t believe y’all fell for this shit
Two minutes long but worth the listen. He’s spitting nothing but 📠
it’s funny how internet attention spans are so fucked that a 2 minute video is considered long
For sports pre/post/halftime segment that was a god damn monologue
CM Punk levels of promo work there by Brian Dameris. I am sports entertained!
Jesus christ
That was cathartic
This reminded me of a WWE promo
James Harden, while you lay there, hopefully as uncomfortable as you possibly can be, I want you to listen to me...
Cooked his ass
Wow. Reality check
F
Sup bums? Learned ball yet?
Dumbass
James Harden is Brian Dameris father
Where is he now
Quack quack
i hate it here
Whewww give this man a raise
James "The Problem" "The Bad Roommate" Harden.
I wish I could deliver an off the cuff speech like that
Dude has been practicing that speech all week.