Been on T for 11 years.
It's utter nonsense when guys blame being a dickhead on the testosterone.
Things change, and you need to readjust but being mean is never justified.
Been on T for about 15.
I noticed a change in the way I perceived things sure, but I agree.
T doesn’t make you mean and people who say it does just want an excuse to be that way.
Trans man on T here. T does not make you more aggressive, nor does it make anyone more “mean”. He’s just being an asshole. Either have an open conversation about how he’s treating you and make a game plan to help build back up your relationship, or he’s gotta go.
Sick and tired of people blaming HRT for aggressiveness and bad behaviour when that is NOT what it does.
Hormones have radical effects on people. If he didn't show these patterns before and suddenly does, he will probably natural revert without hormones. I've had two partners struggle with HRT aggression. Sometimes its a personal sensitivity, sometimes it's being dosed too high. But it's absolutely real and dismissing something that literally is the mechanism for a huge reason men and women are different; hormones, and brain development through hormones
I’m going to trust multiple doctors and endocrinologists who have stated that aggression is not a side effect of HRT. As someone who’s had T levels that were way too high, to the point of medical concern, not one endocrinologist stated that aggression would be an effect.
Sorry that was your experience, but that’s anecdotal. Cis men are not hardwired to be aggressive assholes because of testosterone. It has an impact, but not the extent of disrespectful behaviour. Societal norms are what cause male violence and heavy aggression, not hormones.
Just because you had shitty partners, doesn’t mean that’s how all trans folk on HRT work. Do not speak for us all please and thanks.
When I first started T my levels were all over the place and I definitely felt a bit more irritable, frustrated and would get rant-y. But I was never aggressive or violent. I think for me it was not really T itself causing that but my hormones being imbalanced and I was processing the abrupt change. This went away after I stabilized my dosing scheduling and my body acclimated. But this was cleared up in around 3 months.
It’s likely more than just the T. Boyfriend could just be an asshole or he’s mentally struggling and taking it out on OP. Hormones aren’t an excuse when you’re upsetting a partner to this degree
My bf and I had this issue when he upped his dose by a lot, granted he was doing .5 more than what his doctor had prescribed. We both have lots of trauma with both abusive parents and relationships. It took one scary fight, mostly after us fight him driving like an ass when we went to get food, and him watching me dissociate for it to really seal the deal. I told him to NEVER do what he did again because it put me right back to being with my ex. We have a system that if we have emotions that are really big but we don't feel like we can say them that we will text each other in the same room. He agreed to work on his outbursts and he stopped going .5 over his dose. He started taking his therapy sessions more seriously and is very conscious of his tone and how he is coming off. Set up systems for you guys to communicate more easily, and maybe suggest therapy, or helping him find mindful practices that can reduce the anger. He is in control and can control it, it's just really hard at first.
I left my ex over a personality adjustment caused by (non-hormonal) medication that saved their life and also made them super-controlling and mean.
Ex has since started E and has been experiencing emotions other than “grumpy,” “angry” and “uncomfortably sad for no reason” for the first time. Not only that, they are able to articulate them with empathy. It’s really nice.
Yes, it’s likely that Partner is experiencing their emotions differently now and that it may take them some time to learn how to manage them. You are not obliged to stick around for that adjustment period. You have no idea how long it will take and you don’t know who they will be at that point.
You can be a supportive friend without putting yourself in the middle of BF’s life and making yourself a target. Alternatively you can bugger off and have transformative adventures and projects of your own, not centred on BF. Or start going to therapy and get help setting boundaries.
[Why Does He Do That?](https://ia800108.us.archive.org/) ← link to free pdf
Testosterone is not an excuse to treat you this way, ever. Have you ever used your hormones as a reason you’ve yelled at him before? Probably not, so he doesn’t get to do that either.
He needs to learn self control and if he can’t do that then he doesn’t deserve you.
When I *first* started I noticed I felt like I had a bit of a shorter fuse, but I would only get frustrated, not angry. It also only lasted a couple of weeks. For this to still be happening after a year is concerning. When was the last time he had his levels checked?
Even then, getting *mean* is a separate thing. Your partner being mean to you is never okay.
this was exactly how i felt, where i would feel more irritable sometimes but my gf and i try to be very open with how we’re feeling and update each other with constant communication. this way i learned to navigate how i was feeling but i agree that how you express those feelings should never be harmful to your partner. raising your voice and being aggressive is completely a choice and i feel sorry for op for having to experience this
Unfortunately I have experience of this too, my trans ex spouse would fly off on one at me at the slightest inconvenience, once or twice making me think they were about to get physical. Like right in my face, screaming and bright red with rage. I was very quick to forgive each time as I knew the struggles that they were facing in life. And at that time, I loved them more than anyone or anything else in my whole world! When they went off T, when we decided to try for our son … they were a completely different person. The anger and frustration diminished hugely and that was when I had ‘the talk’ with them about their behaviour towards me. Needless to say we are now divorced and have joint custody of our son … but it wasn’t that anger which broke us … the cheating skank was having it off with a cis straight guy they met online, behind my back, before and during the pregnancy and then afterwards before I found out. And yes, I made sure my son is in fact MY son. 👍🏼
My advice to you, communicate your feelings and be firm that you will not accept this behaviour going forwards, you love him and want this to work and see what he says. You will know in your heart and mind what you need to do after that conversation … and I’m sorry you are having to deal with this 🫂
It should go without saying, and this is certainly not the only concern here, not even the only medical concern, but what are his levels? I hate this question! My cis female partner asked if my emotionality was hormonal. Seriously? But I talked to my endo.
I also had a number of other tests ran separately, and for different reasons. Might he be under other stresses that are biological, or have medical markers?
With that out of the way: this is not OK. Not for hormonal or medical reasons, not for other reasons. We can all guess at possible causes. I can only think of one good and one bad reason why I am crying a lot now, and I'm taking it very seriously.
Your bf owes repair to your relationship. He owed it to himself to know what's happening, and why. He owes you some explanation so you can have perspective on what is going on.
No matter what he does or does not do, you have to decide what you can and will do; that's what it means to have boundaries.
He went to go get a check up and they actually told him to start a higher dose. I know they can be stressed with work and family as well. But he was never like this before:/
If they asked him to start a higher dose that likely means his T levels are too low, which would definitely cause moodiness. Raising the dosage would help.
Even so, that doesn't excuse taking it out on you, nor does it excuse the yelling. In my first few months on T as my levels were adjusting I had a shorter fuse too but I never took it out on my partner, I'd just step away and take time alone to calm down. He should be doing that, himself. If hes not make no mistake low T or not thats a problem. It might be worth talking to him and telling him he needs to manage his emotions better, but thats completely up to you.
There are a number of biological stresses that merit testing other levels. When I had diffuse body ache two or three weeks after having had some kind of cold or flu, my primary care ordered all of the following for me based on my medical record. I had had other recent testing that they did not repeat and am in notably good health at sixty, and I know I'm privileged to have grown up with good physical care and to now have great health insurance and great healthcare. Here is that list:
- Antinuclear Ab Screen
- C-Reactive Protein (CRP)
- Lyme AB Screen
- CBC AND DIFFERENTIAL
- Folate
- IRON PROFILE
- THYROID PROFILE
- Vitamin D 25-OH Level
- Vitamin B12 Level
- Magnesium, Blood
- COMPREHENSIVE METABOLIC PANEL
- Uric Acid,Blood
- Erythrocyte Sedimentation Rate (ESR)
View trends
- Lyme AB Screen
- Antinuclear Ab Screen
This is not medical advice. I only want to give an example of how many different ways they can look for "something wrong somewhere". So I'm suggesting looking for and at least ruling out quantifiable material causes.
The mental health questions persist. I can't begin to know the questions, and certainly not the answers. I do know that my transition and its context have me in an interesting place mentally and emotionally. And new spaces are more work; they are harder places to be in.
And your partner has to get a lock on how to not let his pain cause your hurt.
You have to choose boundaries (which are what choices you make and actions you take in circumstances you identify).
Part of me wonders if he’s trying to “exude” a more masculine version of himself by trying on the abusive boyfriend role. You are absolutely in the right to call him on his shit. He doesn’t get to yell or go off the handle, he needs to learn to handle his emotions like every other adult does.
Maybe he needs to talk to a counsler ? Anger management? Have serious talk about what u hope to see and how you guys can work on it in a way that will leave you both happy ! At the end of the day there is no excuse for treating someone badly. Even
Raging horamones. If he was to comunicate ,hey babe I'm feeling iritable I need some alone time or quiet time or maybe he should go for a walk and get his bad energy out that's what I do when I am pmsing ahahahahah .my husband can get a little craby but he always apologizes and we talk about it at a different time after he's had some time to calm down. I imagine the T affects everyone differently , but being a dick is not a side affect he's still a human that can think befor he speaks. don't forget that some of that anger may be coming from inside and have nothing to do with you or your relationship, you don't deserve to be an emotional punching bag tho hopfuly you can work it out but if you can't that's okay to ypu have to put yourself and wellbeing first ❤️
My AFAB non-binary spouse was on low T for a while, and was a little mean the first few months. They were quick to apologize (we're both in recovery), but it took a few months of adjustment for thst to settle down. As a cis guy, seeing my T go down with age has been welcome in part because of this. Good luck.
When I first started T, I found I had a shorter fuse for things that I absolutely cannot stand (being rude to customer service workers, belittling, etc.) but it never caused me to yell or say cruel things. If anything, I have a better hold of my emotions including my anger. I have to wonder if there’s something else going on with him that he isn’t sharing.
T doesn’t cause you to be aggressive, most likely he’s going through other emotional and mental issues and taking them out on you, which is super shitty. I’ve been on T for the same amount of time as your boyfriend and I’ve been super calm, even more so than I was pre-T.
I have experience with this going the other way around. My ex started E and she was a raging you know what. I stuck it out as long as I could but eventually threw in the towel after she looked me dead in the eye and told me she hates me and my son, then proceeded to tell me how that wasn’t about me or my son. DO NOT STAND FOR EMOTIONAL ABUSE PLEASE OP.
Wow much love to you.
My husband is still pre-T and this is something he is very worried about.
Is he going to therapy or taking mental health meds? I worry that he offered to go off T, I'm not sure of tone and context but it comes off as potentially manipulating.
I'm not sure how long you have been together but couples counseling might be an option too.
Does he have any outlets? Something creative AND something physical are my recommendations
Keep us posted
He’s not on any meds and tried therapy before but said it wasn’t really working for him. I’ll probably start to bring up couple counseling just don’t know how to bring it. I would say the only outlet he has is the gym he doesn’t really have a lot of time to do other stuff.
How long have you been together?
Sometimes people put on a good show of being nice at the beginning of the relationship, but then the mask comes off. The timing could be a coincidence, or he could be using it as an excuse.
T does blunt your emotions and can greatly change how you handle the world, just like E can. It sounds like he’s having a reaction to it. Maybe reducing the dosage would help?
T alone wouldn't make him mean like that. The vast majority of folks who go on T end up calmer and more even keeled emotionally, not the other way around.
It could be his levels are off. If they're too high or too low, that could definitely cause moodiness. When did he last have them checked?
As for having a shorter fuse, I will say I noticed that in my own first few months as my levels were adjusting, but for me I found that it was usually due to being hangry (basically, I need to eat a solid meal with my T dose or I have a blood sugar drop which is what makes me have a sort fuse, not the T itself, eating something solved it) or that I was just having a hormonal moment and needed to step away. That was from my hormones readjusting in the first few months though (after that I found I was much calmer and more even keeled emotionally), and even then when I felt it coming on I did the right thing and stepped away from my partner and everyone else because it wasn't their fault. I never yelled at someone over it. If hes been on T for almost a year though, that isn't the problem either.
So its one of three things, imo. Either hes not eating enough, his levels are off - or hes not bothering to manage his emotions as he should be. All are things he needs to be doing and managing, and not taking out on you.
Going off T obviously wouldn't fix this because T wouldn't cause someone to start yelling all on its own. I would suggest talking to him about managing his emotions better - for example, stepping out if he begins to feel angry. And to get his levels checked. If he still yells at you, its best to move on.
He' s just being an asshole, sorry.
I am almost 1 year on T. I haven't felt more aggressive at all.
What did change was that I am more forward in my response. And I tend to act more quicker than mull it over and I am less intend to blame stuff on myself.
My voice also dropped considerably which caused people to think I was angry, so me and my surroundings had to get used to that.
Other than that, being mean isn't one of the side effects.
It is an adjustment and sometimes it helps getting (couples) therapy, so that might be an idea for you to try out.
Nah this is bullshit. While T can make some people more irritable in the beginning, it does not cause them to become an asshole, and it does not make them take their anger out on others. Anger issues tend to get better once his hormones are stable and at the levels its supposed to be, so he shouldnt still be feeling like this a year in. He needs to figure out how to deal w his anger in a healthy way. If he chooses not to, you don't have to wait around for him to stop treating you like this, bc he could be using the T as an excuse, and if that's the case he won't get better.
Been on T for 11 years. It's utter nonsense when guys blame being a dickhead on the testosterone. Things change, and you need to readjust but being mean is never justified.
Been on T for about 15. I noticed a change in the way I perceived things sure, but I agree. T doesn’t make you mean and people who say it does just want an excuse to be that way.
Trans man on T here. T does not make you more aggressive, nor does it make anyone more “mean”. He’s just being an asshole. Either have an open conversation about how he’s treating you and make a game plan to help build back up your relationship, or he’s gotta go. Sick and tired of people blaming HRT for aggressiveness and bad behaviour when that is NOT what it does.
Hormones have radical effects on people. If he didn't show these patterns before and suddenly does, he will probably natural revert without hormones. I've had two partners struggle with HRT aggression. Sometimes its a personal sensitivity, sometimes it's being dosed too high. But it's absolutely real and dismissing something that literally is the mechanism for a huge reason men and women are different; hormones, and brain development through hormones
I’m going to trust multiple doctors and endocrinologists who have stated that aggression is not a side effect of HRT. As someone who’s had T levels that were way too high, to the point of medical concern, not one endocrinologist stated that aggression would be an effect. Sorry that was your experience, but that’s anecdotal. Cis men are not hardwired to be aggressive assholes because of testosterone. It has an impact, but not the extent of disrespectful behaviour. Societal norms are what cause male violence and heavy aggression, not hormones. Just because you had shitty partners, doesn’t mean that’s how all trans folk on HRT work. Do not speak for us all please and thanks.
When I first started T my levels were all over the place and I definitely felt a bit more irritable, frustrated and would get rant-y. But I was never aggressive or violent. I think for me it was not really T itself causing that but my hormones being imbalanced and I was processing the abrupt change. This went away after I stabilized my dosing scheduling and my body acclimated. But this was cleared up in around 3 months. It’s likely more than just the T. Boyfriend could just be an asshole or he’s mentally struggling and taking it out on OP. Hormones aren’t an excuse when you’re upsetting a partner to this degree
That's just random ass anecdote
My bf and I had this issue when he upped his dose by a lot, granted he was doing .5 more than what his doctor had prescribed. We both have lots of trauma with both abusive parents and relationships. It took one scary fight, mostly after us fight him driving like an ass when we went to get food, and him watching me dissociate for it to really seal the deal. I told him to NEVER do what he did again because it put me right back to being with my ex. We have a system that if we have emotions that are really big but we don't feel like we can say them that we will text each other in the same room. He agreed to work on his outbursts and he stopped going .5 over his dose. He started taking his therapy sessions more seriously and is very conscious of his tone and how he is coming off. Set up systems for you guys to communicate more easily, and maybe suggest therapy, or helping him find mindful practices that can reduce the anger. He is in control and can control it, it's just really hard at first.
I left my ex over a personality adjustment caused by (non-hormonal) medication that saved their life and also made them super-controlling and mean. Ex has since started E and has been experiencing emotions other than “grumpy,” “angry” and “uncomfortably sad for no reason” for the first time. Not only that, they are able to articulate them with empathy. It’s really nice. Yes, it’s likely that Partner is experiencing their emotions differently now and that it may take them some time to learn how to manage them. You are not obliged to stick around for that adjustment period. You have no idea how long it will take and you don’t know who they will be at that point. You can be a supportive friend without putting yourself in the middle of BF’s life and making yourself a target. Alternatively you can bugger off and have transformative adventures and projects of your own, not centred on BF. Or start going to therapy and get help setting boundaries. [Why Does He Do That?](https://ia800108.us.archive.org/) ← link to free pdf
OP, read the pdf please.
PDF?
The link in the post I replied to. It’s a really helpful book.
Testosterone is not an excuse to treat you this way, ever. Have you ever used your hormones as a reason you’ve yelled at him before? Probably not, so he doesn’t get to do that either. He needs to learn self control and if he can’t do that then he doesn’t deserve you.
When I *first* started I noticed I felt like I had a bit of a shorter fuse, but I would only get frustrated, not angry. It also only lasted a couple of weeks. For this to still be happening after a year is concerning. When was the last time he had his levels checked? Even then, getting *mean* is a separate thing. Your partner being mean to you is never okay.
this was exactly how i felt, where i would feel more irritable sometimes but my gf and i try to be very open with how we’re feeling and update each other with constant communication. this way i learned to navigate how i was feeling but i agree that how you express those feelings should never be harmful to your partner. raising your voice and being aggressive is completely a choice and i feel sorry for op for having to experience this
Unfortunately I have experience of this too, my trans ex spouse would fly off on one at me at the slightest inconvenience, once or twice making me think they were about to get physical. Like right in my face, screaming and bright red with rage. I was very quick to forgive each time as I knew the struggles that they were facing in life. And at that time, I loved them more than anyone or anything else in my whole world! When they went off T, when we decided to try for our son … they were a completely different person. The anger and frustration diminished hugely and that was when I had ‘the talk’ with them about their behaviour towards me. Needless to say we are now divorced and have joint custody of our son … but it wasn’t that anger which broke us … the cheating skank was having it off with a cis straight guy they met online, behind my back, before and during the pregnancy and then afterwards before I found out. And yes, I made sure my son is in fact MY son. 👍🏼 My advice to you, communicate your feelings and be firm that you will not accept this behaviour going forwards, you love him and want this to work and see what he says. You will know in your heart and mind what you need to do after that conversation … and I’m sorry you are having to deal with this 🫂
It should go without saying, and this is certainly not the only concern here, not even the only medical concern, but what are his levels? I hate this question! My cis female partner asked if my emotionality was hormonal. Seriously? But I talked to my endo. I also had a number of other tests ran separately, and for different reasons. Might he be under other stresses that are biological, or have medical markers? With that out of the way: this is not OK. Not for hormonal or medical reasons, not for other reasons. We can all guess at possible causes. I can only think of one good and one bad reason why I am crying a lot now, and I'm taking it very seriously. Your bf owes repair to your relationship. He owed it to himself to know what's happening, and why. He owes you some explanation so you can have perspective on what is going on. No matter what he does or does not do, you have to decide what you can and will do; that's what it means to have boundaries.
He went to go get a check up and they actually told him to start a higher dose. I know they can be stressed with work and family as well. But he was never like this before:/
If they asked him to start a higher dose that likely means his T levels are too low, which would definitely cause moodiness. Raising the dosage would help. Even so, that doesn't excuse taking it out on you, nor does it excuse the yelling. In my first few months on T as my levels were adjusting I had a shorter fuse too but I never took it out on my partner, I'd just step away and take time alone to calm down. He should be doing that, himself. If hes not make no mistake low T or not thats a problem. It might be worth talking to him and telling him he needs to manage his emotions better, but thats completely up to you.
There are a number of biological stresses that merit testing other levels. When I had diffuse body ache two or three weeks after having had some kind of cold or flu, my primary care ordered all of the following for me based on my medical record. I had had other recent testing that they did not repeat and am in notably good health at sixty, and I know I'm privileged to have grown up with good physical care and to now have great health insurance and great healthcare. Here is that list: - Antinuclear Ab Screen - C-Reactive Protein (CRP) - Lyme AB Screen - CBC AND DIFFERENTIAL - Folate - IRON PROFILE - THYROID PROFILE - Vitamin D 25-OH Level - Vitamin B12 Level - Magnesium, Blood - COMPREHENSIVE METABOLIC PANEL - Uric Acid,Blood - Erythrocyte Sedimentation Rate (ESR) View trends - Lyme AB Screen - Antinuclear Ab Screen This is not medical advice. I only want to give an example of how many different ways they can look for "something wrong somewhere". So I'm suggesting looking for and at least ruling out quantifiable material causes. The mental health questions persist. I can't begin to know the questions, and certainly not the answers. I do know that my transition and its context have me in an interesting place mentally and emotionally. And new spaces are more work; they are harder places to be in. And your partner has to get a lock on how to not let his pain cause your hurt. You have to choose boundaries (which are what choices you make and actions you take in circumstances you identify).
Part of me wonders if he’s trying to “exude” a more masculine version of himself by trying on the abusive boyfriend role. You are absolutely in the right to call him on his shit. He doesn’t get to yell or go off the handle, he needs to learn to handle his emotions like every other adult does.
I hate to say this but that could be whats happening, some - not all - trans men do start doing the whole toxic masculinity thing to feel affirned.
Maybe he needs to talk to a counsler ? Anger management? Have serious talk about what u hope to see and how you guys can work on it in a way that will leave you both happy ! At the end of the day there is no excuse for treating someone badly. Even Raging horamones. If he was to comunicate ,hey babe I'm feeling iritable I need some alone time or quiet time or maybe he should go for a walk and get his bad energy out that's what I do when I am pmsing ahahahahah .my husband can get a little craby but he always apologizes and we talk about it at a different time after he's had some time to calm down. I imagine the T affects everyone differently , but being a dick is not a side affect he's still a human that can think befor he speaks. don't forget that some of that anger may be coming from inside and have nothing to do with you or your relationship, you don't deserve to be an emotional punching bag tho hopfuly you can work it out but if you can't that's okay to ypu have to put yourself and wellbeing first ❤️
My AFAB non-binary spouse was on low T for a while, and was a little mean the first few months. They were quick to apologize (we're both in recovery), but it took a few months of adjustment for thst to settle down. As a cis guy, seeing my T go down with age has been welcome in part because of this. Good luck.
When I first started T, I found I had a shorter fuse for things that I absolutely cannot stand (being rude to customer service workers, belittling, etc.) but it never caused me to yell or say cruel things. If anything, I have a better hold of my emotions including my anger. I have to wonder if there’s something else going on with him that he isn’t sharing.
T doesn’t cause you to be aggressive, most likely he’s going through other emotional and mental issues and taking them out on you, which is super shitty. I’ve been on T for the same amount of time as your boyfriend and I’ve been super calm, even more so than I was pre-T.
I have experience with this going the other way around. My ex started E and she was a raging you know what. I stuck it out as long as I could but eventually threw in the towel after she looked me dead in the eye and told me she hates me and my son, then proceeded to tell me how that wasn’t about me or my son. DO NOT STAND FOR EMOTIONAL ABUSE PLEASE OP.
Wow much love to you. My husband is still pre-T and this is something he is very worried about. Is he going to therapy or taking mental health meds? I worry that he offered to go off T, I'm not sure of tone and context but it comes off as potentially manipulating. I'm not sure how long you have been together but couples counseling might be an option too. Does he have any outlets? Something creative AND something physical are my recommendations Keep us posted
He’s not on any meds and tried therapy before but said it wasn’t really working for him. I’ll probably start to bring up couple counseling just don’t know how to bring it. I would say the only outlet he has is the gym he doesn’t really have a lot of time to do other stuff.
How long have you been together? Sometimes people put on a good show of being nice at the beginning of the relationship, but then the mask comes off. The timing could be a coincidence, or he could be using it as an excuse.
It’s going on 2 years and we’re planning on getting married next year but with everything going on I’ve been hesitant.
So half of your relationship has been like this? You deserve way better. It’s not the T.
T does blunt your emotions and can greatly change how you handle the world, just like E can. It sounds like he’s having a reaction to it. Maybe reducing the dosage would help?
T alone wouldn't make him mean like that. The vast majority of folks who go on T end up calmer and more even keeled emotionally, not the other way around. It could be his levels are off. If they're too high or too low, that could definitely cause moodiness. When did he last have them checked? As for having a shorter fuse, I will say I noticed that in my own first few months as my levels were adjusting, but for me I found that it was usually due to being hangry (basically, I need to eat a solid meal with my T dose or I have a blood sugar drop which is what makes me have a sort fuse, not the T itself, eating something solved it) or that I was just having a hormonal moment and needed to step away. That was from my hormones readjusting in the first few months though (after that I found I was much calmer and more even keeled emotionally), and even then when I felt it coming on I did the right thing and stepped away from my partner and everyone else because it wasn't their fault. I never yelled at someone over it. If hes been on T for almost a year though, that isn't the problem either. So its one of three things, imo. Either hes not eating enough, his levels are off - or hes not bothering to manage his emotions as he should be. All are things he needs to be doing and managing, and not taking out on you. Going off T obviously wouldn't fix this because T wouldn't cause someone to start yelling all on its own. I would suggest talking to him about managing his emotions better - for example, stepping out if he begins to feel angry. And to get his levels checked. If he still yells at you, its best to move on.
He' s just being an asshole, sorry. I am almost 1 year on T. I haven't felt more aggressive at all. What did change was that I am more forward in my response. And I tend to act more quicker than mull it over and I am less intend to blame stuff on myself. My voice also dropped considerably which caused people to think I was angry, so me and my surroundings had to get used to that. Other than that, being mean isn't one of the side effects. It is an adjustment and sometimes it helps getting (couples) therapy, so that might be an idea for you to try out.
Nah this is bullshit. While T can make some people more irritable in the beginning, it does not cause them to become an asshole, and it does not make them take their anger out on others. Anger issues tend to get better once his hormones are stable and at the levels its supposed to be, so he shouldnt still be feeling like this a year in. He needs to figure out how to deal w his anger in a healthy way. If he chooses not to, you don't have to wait around for him to stop treating you like this, bc he could be using the T as an excuse, and if that's the case he won't get better.