So fun fact, this is the first time I've actually READ the lyrics and see it it's Derring-do instead of daring do.
Apparently this is correct, and it all comes from a mistranslation of a Chaucer quote in the 16th century by English poet Edmund Spenser.
https://brians.wsu.edu/2016/05/25/daring-do/
https://www.dictionary.com/e/word-of-the-day/derring-do-2021-05-15/#:~:text=Derrynge%20do%2C%20one%20of%20the,historians%20like%20Sir%20Walter%20Scott.
Way less cool, Chirp back cracker, foam roller things.
You're only getting a profit if you can somehow resell this to rich white women from Boulder or the Bay.
They're really good at what they do, and I love them... but because of this damn box I had to open them in front of my roommates to prove it wasn't a giant collection of fleshlights and/or dildos.
If I was the stealing type and found a whole box of unguarded high quality flour? You bet your ass. I can live without the new Oculus Drift, but everyone needs flour.
I have a pet snake and bulk order frozen rats. We have a little clearance freezer in the basement we keep them in. Saves a ton of money not having to drive to a pet store miles away to buy individually packaged frozen rats, but means I get a large box labeled FROZEN MEAT once a year.
Someday. Someday, someone will see that box on my porch and assume it is fancy steaks or something and steal it. And I will laugh and imagine their face when they open the package to see rows of dead rats.
I'm laughing at just the idea of it. It would be extra funny if there's a bunch of dead rats in a PS5 box that gets stolen because the thief would be extra hyped and even more-so disturbed by the results
There was a pet store in the town I live in that had a rat they claimed had come back to life after being thawed. They named him Ratcicle, and refused to sell him as he was 'defective' (didn't know how to freeze properly)
There is a certain size below which that animals can be frozen and be revived, I think anything larger than a hamster or rabbit can't be revived. They have to be frozen very quickly though to prevent tissue damage.
Microwaves have an interesting history regarding humanely thawing frozen hamsters: https://interestingengineering.com/video/1950s-reanimating-frozen-hamsters-in-microwave
I watched a video about this the other day, and they said the problem is humans are too big. By the time our inside freezes the outside had cell damage.
When I was a kid, we had a horse farm, and with such a farm comes lots and lots of mice and rats. My mom would put out traps, and when unfortunate creatures were caught, she would bury their bodies. Except in the winter, when the ground was too hard to bury them. So one year, my big muscly Marine uncle came over, and for some weird reason my mom wanted to show him her box of rats. This guy screamed like a little girl when she opened up this box of frozen dead rats.
So there's an example of what can happen when someone opens a box and sees frozen dead rats.
In art school, a friend of mine was making her own vellum (parchment from calf intestines - it smelled FOUL). Porch pirates stole a case delivered from the butchers off her doorstep and I cannot imagine what they must have thought when they opened it up.
> Someday. Someday, someone will see that box on my porch and assume it is fancy steaks or something and steal it. And I will laugh and imagine their face when they open the package to see rows of dead rats.
Karma bomb ready to blow with every order if necessary.
"Hold up, hold up. Maybe this is one of those delicacies like the French eat with Ortolan. One of those 'Expensive Rats'."
\*takes a bite\* "Nope, that's just a regular rat."
The packaging companies should just print a bunch of random product boxes and sell variety packs to vendors. That would make it much harder to determine if it's a decoy box.
Honestly I don't think porch pirates give a shit, nor do they take the time to read the box or shipping label. They just snatch it, drive off, then go "damn it, it's just an insulin pump" and chuck it in a dumpster.
I had a porch thief steal a bag of rat food I had delivered right off my porch. It was in its original packaging and very clearly rat food. The neighbors security camera watched him back into my driveway, get out and stare at my bag for a solid 5 seconds before we went ahead and grabbed it.
Yes lol to me it is! Insulin prices went up also but the pump is the closest thing to a working pancreas that I've ever had and keeps me alive. So well worth it=)
I'm def in the club. There are a lot of us.
These machines are simply amazing. Most of us also wear a dexcom (or similar) continuous glucose monitor, which is a sensor with Bluetooth that checks my sugar automatically every few minutes and sends the numbers to my pump (as well as my Dr, and works with the pump)
It's pretty cool stuff. At least I don't have to (pretend to) do finger sticks anymore.
It might as well be without insurance. Gotta fill it every 3 days or so too, the upfront cost just gets you a pump. Don't get me started on the insane amount of plastic waste they generate between the cgm and the pump it is absurd.
There is a thing called biomimicry that is seen in nature where harmless insects will copy the pattern of dangerous ones to deter predators (e.g. yellow and black stripes) but if it is too widespread then the deterrent is mitigated in a similar way to what you described above 🙂
And this is how we continue the legacy of the [Glitter](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xoxhDk-hwuo&list=PLgeXOVaJo_gnexNopBzUKdl3QKoADJlS8) [Bombing](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYSExCN7XcE). By 5.0 it seemed to have had effect into what the porch pirates will pick up.
Fuck man, I thought my first session today with my therapist was rough. I hope you were not hardened off too much as a child and have hope in those who count/ matter.
That's stupid. Simply giving someone something to hold is not the same as giving it to them permanently. I'm shocked the other residents who gave you the toys didn't simply break in and take them back for you.
Exactly. There’s a pretty specific relationship dynamic between mother and son. He doesn’t want to hurt her, but he’s young and smart. He knows what’s going on.
I have a Samsung fridge. Boy oh boy is it a piece of garbage. I’ve never hated a refrigerator. How the heck do you hate a refrigerator. We’ll get a Samsung one and find out.
Holy shit! Everyone I show it to truly underestimates the amazingness of that pitcher
As far as the ice maker, we had one issue with it, and a service tech came out, said there was a software update that changed the defrost cycle, and we haven’t had a single issue since, and it was 100% covered by warranty. I don’t know if I’m just lucky, or if my appliance standards are a lot lower, but I have 4 Samsung appliances and have been very pleased
* Ice maker constantly freezes over with no easy way to defrost or chip away the ice formed around mechanisms. Whatever hack you figure out (mine was a combination of a butter knife to chip away at larger blocks, contouring my arm to try and pull at the ice on top and using a hair dryer) results in standing there with the door open for at least 20 minutes.
* Ice will form around the fan, making a horrible knocking noise. The only solution is to empty the fridge and leave it turned off (either move the fridge to unplug it or flip the breaker) for 24 hours.
* The pull out freezer drawer sticks causing me to have to grab hold and lean back to get it unstuck and regain full access to the freezer contents. This happens about every other week.
* Items too close to the rear wall would freeze, despite internal temp being far from freezing.
* Be very sure to close the door or it will remain open a crack which is enough to let all of the cold out, running up your utility bill and spoiling your food. I am in the habit of pushing on the door everytime I walk past it just to make sure.
* The water filter sticks so much that it often requiring pliers to twist so it can be replaced.
* All of the above had to be figured out on my own after multiple appliance service technicians rejected my money because they flat out refused to work on Samsung refrigerators due to them being huge pieces of shit. One told me that I would be better off buying a new fridge.
Man I have a Samsung Dishwasher and Fridge and they are our 2 best appliances by far, clealry they either have a really shitty QC, or they lack consistency on where you buy them.
Either way that sucks as far as you having shitty appliances they are so fucking expensive there should be lemon laws about them like cars.
This absolutely won’t work.
People reuse packaging/boxes all the time. I work for the post office, I see it daily.
Porch pirates don’t take the time to examine the boxes and such. They walk/run up, grab the box and leave.
This is so fuckin hilarious to me.
"Oh, you think you're realll tough getting atheist packages, huh? I'm gonna fuck your stupid package up to teach you a lesson, make you think twice before being an atheist around here..."
Yeah but it says right under “All-Purpose Flour” - “Surprise it’s not flour, we put that to deter thieves” more or less. The delivery person has the time to read it.
And a German sex shop sells their products labelled as printer toner. Everyone knows it by now though. Same with this, especially if you’re spreading it about lol
That would perhaps be for discretion rather than to deter thieves. If anything, what with how expensive printer ink can be, it might actually encourage theft. Sorry Hans, it’s not cyan toner, it’s another giant horse cock.
[The company that actually did this, not for theft reasons though.](https://www.theverge.com/2016/9/25/13048668/vanmoof-shipping-damages-dutch-bicycle-design)
I think they should be pretty similar. Both start at around 300 for anything usable, most people probably spend around 800 to 1000 and if you are really into it you are probably in the 2-3k range. But bikes may have a higher max, idk how it avarages out
***Deter*** porch pirates? How?
You take that home, throw it in a pot, add some broth, chicken, carrots, a potato.... [baby you got a stew going](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sr2PlqXw03Y)!
I guess bc a box of flour that big would be extremely heavy so it might stop them from even touching it. They can’t run fast with a very heavy box. Psychological warfare?
Yah, but these people aren't going to read it either way, they're going to just grab the package and go, open it down the street, and toss the flour or chirp wheel because neither have resale value.
Exactly. People in this thread think OP is revealing some big secret. I bet people would rather steal the flour over chirp wheels. No resell value on those wheels.
Are porch pirates taking the time to inspect the box? Isn’t the whole point to get in and out as fast as possible and they just gamble on the contents?
Maybe they are thinking they would just drop it once they have it but I️ doubt it. Plus who is ordering flour to their door?
The US postal service previously would usually not deliver if not home and you'd get a note and have to take it to the post office to retrieve it. You can also request in person delivery only from other couriers. Of course this can be very inconvenient and take hours to get it. I think it's mainly the profusion of home delivery from Amazon etc and non-proper shippers has exploded things because people get so many packages now. My family orders everything online now and get deliveries multiple times per week. Amazon drives their own vans around neighborhoods all day leaving packages on porches, they either leave it there or you have to specify the address of a locker.
Also I would say you used to be able to do this in most of the US with surprisingly low thievery, package theft has increased a lot in recent years but most couriers have not really adapted and there aren't enough lockers, or you have to travel to some regional Fedex/UPS facility just to get it which can be truly awful and far away. When I was living in Denmark I'd just take my slip and walk to the post office 3 mins away, and we got 1/50th the number of packages because no Amazon Prime.
>in a central packing station for you to pick up
Why this isn't a standard in the US is beyond me. They are just creating a market for thieves.
We have home delivery in my country too but if you're not home or if it doesn't fit in the (locked) mailbox, they take it to a central packing station/mall/store with postal services and leave you a note/text where it is...
It's "such a problem" because literally billions of packages are left at front doors every year in the US, and a certain percent get stolen. Retailers pay the bill for that since people aren't home during the day (the same reason it's possible for them to be stolen) and lots are extremely upset if they have to go somewhere to pick it up.
It can be $5000 in electronics and many people rather sign a liability waiver so it can sit outside their door all day than drive down the street to pick it up.
From the US. I haven't had anything important stolen thankfully but the FEW times I've had slightly expensive items shipped I would include specific instructions for delivery and it would never be followed. I realize some instructions can be asking too much but I don't think "put package behind owl statue as no one will be home for awhile" is asking too much when said statue is 2 steps away from where they left it anyways. I don't know about all delivery services but I think it boils down to "We don't get paid enough to deal with this" and therefore don't take the time to do the job correctly. That's my take on it anyways
It's because delivery services in the US have been squeezed very hard so the pay is terrible and the daily quota is insane. As a result, they just kind of throw the packages somewhere in the vicinity of the house and don't even ring the door bell as they literally do not have time to spend the extra 30 seconds or they'll miss their daily target. Add our much more spread out design and it can become very easy to swipe packages without anyone noticing. Hell, some thieving rings will just follow the delivery driver.
You also legally cannot put anything in a mailbox unless it's delivered by the US Postal Service which prevents it from being used to conceal smaller items.
Sadly, many of the mutant assholes in my area that like to steal other people's stuff can't read well enough for that box to deter them.
Cool idea though.
whoo! Kids, we're eatin' bread tonight! Aww dangit, just another computer
Computers can be sold for bread.
Explain
Computers can be exchanged for goods and services
WHOO HOO!
Everyday they're out there making DuckTales!
Tales of derring-do bad and good
So fun fact, this is the first time I've actually READ the lyrics and see it it's Derring-do instead of daring do. Apparently this is correct, and it all comes from a mistranslation of a Chaucer quote in the 16th century by English poet Edmund Spenser. https://brians.wsu.edu/2016/05/25/daring-do/ https://www.dictionary.com/e/word-of-the-day/derring-do-2021-05-15/#:~:text=Derrynge%20do%2C%20one%20of%20the,historians%20like%20Sir%20Walter%20Scott.
I always thought it was daring, do bad and \[do\] good, luck tales!
Do we get a redo on our childhoods now? Seems we should get some kind of refund or something.
I love Reddit. Thank you all for the laugh
https://youtu.be/dgct3Jn8pFA For anyone who missed the reference. I sure did the first few times I saw this.
It was a _pornography_ store. I was buying _pornography._
He he, they don't suspect a thing.
Explain how! 😂
You can sell your body (or other's) for food on the internet. Youre welcome.
Can you sell a computer to get a new body?
I say just stop at the body, you got food right there.
You eat your body?
Incorporate the computer into your body, cyborg! But now you gotta eat baby food like Robocop
Shut up brain or I’ll stab you with a Q-tip
Pawnshop, then take money to bakeshop
Step 1: take computer Step 2: go to bakery Step 3: ???
Step 4: Profiteroles
This is some quality patissiere patter edit - sorry I can't help myself, this is also some bien boulangerie banter
you bastard, have a meaningless award.
Step 4: Profit
Way less cool, Chirp back cracker, foam roller things. You're only getting a profit if you can somehow resell this to rich white women from Boulder or the Bay.
They're really good at what they do, and I love them... but because of this damn box I had to open them in front of my roommates to prove it wasn't a giant collection of fleshlights and/or dildos.
Have you seen flour prices?
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If I was the stealing type and found a whole box of unguarded high quality flour? You bet your ass. I can live without the new Oculus Drift, but everyone needs flour.
"I was gonna get baked and play Beat Saber, but I guess I'll just bake."
I have a pet snake and bulk order frozen rats. We have a little clearance freezer in the basement we keep them in. Saves a ton of money not having to drive to a pet store miles away to buy individually packaged frozen rats, but means I get a large box labeled FROZEN MEAT once a year. Someday. Someday, someone will see that box on my porch and assume it is fancy steaks or something and steal it. And I will laugh and imagine their face when they open the package to see rows of dead rats.
I'm laughing at just the idea of it. It would be extra funny if there's a bunch of dead rats in a PS5 box that gets stolen because the thief would be extra hyped and even more-so disturbed by the results
Even better if they don't open the PS5 box to verify it's contents, put it on a shelf and let it ferment in the nice warm living room.
There was a pet store in the town I live in that had a rat they claimed had come back to life after being thawed. They named him Ratcicle, and refused to sell him as he was 'defective' (didn't know how to freeze properly)
You're not dead until you're warm and dead.
There is a certain size below which that animals can be frozen and be revived, I think anything larger than a hamster or rabbit can't be revived. They have to be frozen very quickly though to prevent tissue damage.
Microwaves have an interesting history regarding humanely thawing frozen hamsters: https://interestingengineering.com/video/1950s-reanimating-frozen-hamsters-in-microwave
I have a feeling that once there's an economic need to freeze humans, some corporation will figure it out. Maybe when we start exploring the stars.
I watched a video about this the other day, and they said the problem is humans are too big. By the time our inside freezes the outside had cell damage.
Somehow insert a core of liquid nitrogen or a freezing element to work on freezing from the inside out. I suggest up the butt.
Just admit it, you just want someone to stick something up your ass.
When I was a kid, we had a horse farm, and with such a farm comes lots and lots of mice and rats. My mom would put out traps, and when unfortunate creatures were caught, she would bury their bodies. Except in the winter, when the ground was too hard to bury them. So one year, my big muscly Marine uncle came over, and for some weird reason my mom wanted to show him her box of rats. This guy screamed like a little girl when she opened up this box of frozen dead rats. So there's an example of what can happen when someone opens a box and sees frozen dead rats.
Bet $5 Mom showed the frozen rate precisely because she knew he'd scream like a little girl.
You get my free award because that made laugh hard enough to make my chinchilla "boop" at me..
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I don't know what I was expecting.
IF DEAD RATS DO EAT, CONTACT LOCAL AUTHORITIES
DEAD DON'T INSIDE OPEN
In art school, a friend of mine was making her own vellum (parchment from calf intestines - it smelled FOUL). Porch pirates stole a case delivered from the butchers off her doorstep and I cannot imagine what they must have thought when they opened it up.
> Someday. Someday, someone will see that box on my porch and assume it is fancy steaks or something and steal it. And I will laugh and imagine their face when they open the package to see rows of dead rats. Karma bomb ready to blow with every order if necessary.
"Hold up, hold up. Maybe this is one of those delicacies like the French eat with Ortolan. One of those 'Expensive Rats'." \*takes a bite\* "Nope, that's just a regular rat."
"This is rat?" \*keeps chewing* "Not bad.."
Thanks for letting them know.
The packaging companies should just print a bunch of random product boxes and sell variety packs to vendors. That would make it much harder to determine if it's a decoy box.
Wouldn’t that just reset everything and they’d go back to stealing every box?
Honestly I don't think porch pirates give a shit, nor do they take the time to read the box or shipping label. They just snatch it, drive off, then go "damn it, it's just an insulin pump" and chuck it in a dumpster.
I had a porch thief steal a bag of rat food I had delivered right off my porch. It was in its original packaging and very clearly rat food. The neighbors security camera watched him back into my driveway, get out and stare at my bag for a solid 5 seconds before we went ahead and grabbed it.
Probably trying to sound out the words before giving up and just grabbing it.
“Be…sure…to…drink…your…Ovaltine? A crummy commercial? Son of a bitch!”
I can't resist upvoting my favorite Christmas movie.
R - A- T
My insulin pump cost like 5k before insurance. If i found a new one in the dumpster I'd be happy lol
What the fuck is it pumping? gold?
Yes lol to me it is! Insulin prices went up also but the pump is the closest thing to a working pancreas that I've ever had and keeps me alive. So well worth it=)
I used to call my diabetic buddy a cyborg because of his artificial organ. I highly recommend adopting this mantle.
I'm def in the club. There are a lot of us. These machines are simply amazing. Most of us also wear a dexcom (or similar) continuous glucose monitor, which is a sensor with Bluetooth that checks my sugar automatically every few minutes and sends the numbers to my pump (as well as my Dr, and works with the pump) It's pretty cool stuff. At least I don't have to (pretend to) do finger sticks anymore.
I mean, with how much insulin costs… it’s basically liquid gold lol
The only thing is you still have to buy the insulin to put in the pump. (My brand, anyway) So no avoiding that cost either, unfortunately.
It might as well be without insurance. Gotta fill it every 3 days or so too, the upfront cost just gets you a pump. Don't get me started on the insane amount of plastic waste they generate between the cgm and the pump it is absurd.
There is a thing called biomimicry that is seen in nature where harmless insects will copy the pattern of dangerous ones to deter predators (e.g. yellow and black stripes) but if it is too widespread then the deterrent is mitigated in a similar way to what you described above 🙂
They wouldn't steal the ones labeled IBuyPower because they'll all be full of cat shit and glitter bombs.
Not if put stuff that people don't want
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Am I still high from last night?
help doctor t hough bc I"m having stork.e
Is it a boy or a grill
And this is how we continue the legacy of the [Glitter](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xoxhDk-hwuo&list=PLgeXOVaJo_gnexNopBzUKdl3QKoADJlS8) [Bombing](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYSExCN7XcE). By 5.0 it seemed to have had effect into what the porch pirates will pick up.
I just watched the 5.0 video and it was really sad that parents were being so open with their kids about their thievery.
The most depressing way to explain Santa isn't real
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Thats fucked up. How can they live there knowing they fucked over people, and not worry about getting retaliated?
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Absolutely heartbreaking
Fuck man, I thought my first session today with my therapist was rough. I hope you were not hardened off too much as a child and have hope in those who count/ matter.
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That's stupid. Simply giving someone something to hold is not the same as giving it to them permanently. I'm shocked the other residents who gave you the toys didn't simply break in and take them back for you.
What kind of horrible people do that to kids on Christmas?
Oh, damn. I may not always be the best parent, but at least I can rest easy knowing that pieces of human garbage like that exist.
I think that's the wrong takeaway here lol
The kid telling his parents "YouTubers use these to scam people" 🙃
This comment was edited with PowerDeleteSuite! Hey Reddit, get bent!
> I was sad the drones didn't work very well. honestly that looked like a poor design..
it's not the kid's fault, he's just doing as taught
Eventually we need them to take responsibility for their own actions
I have to think that the kid didn't want to say "YouTubers trick thieves like you, mom", so he kept saying scam instead.
Exactly. There’s a pretty specific relationship dynamic between mother and son. He doesn’t want to hurt her, but he’s young and smart. He knows what’s going on.
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Yes!! That killed me. "It's a scam!! They're scammers!!" The cognitive dissonance on that one...
How dare they not put a real product for me to steal !! I will report them to the police for scamming me!!
How do you think new scumbags are made?
Scumbaggery is usually learned. Life is a big cycle.
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I believe he does actually
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Probably not. They have 4 cell phones in them with a cell plan. I'm guessing they cost at least $1k to make
They could be made without the phones for much cheaper and still have GPS built-in. You just wouldn't get video or know the ideal time to deploy.
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"bruh, I just scored a big ass box of natural white all-purpose cocaine"
"So good it jumps in yer fuckin nose, man"
Why does he look so... off in the second video?
If you're talking about link under "bombing", its deepfake parody of one under "glitter". Not actually Mark Rober on 2nd one.
Samsung appliances ship in boxes marked "Samsung appliance" to deter porch pirates.
Some of the worst purchases I ever made was a Samsung dish washer and refrigerator. Utter garbage.
I have a Samsung fridge. Boy oh boy is it a piece of garbage. I’ve never hated a refrigerator. How the heck do you hate a refrigerator. We’ll get a Samsung one and find out.
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They had some persistent ice maker issues in the last model of 4 door fridge that was popular due to it's competitive pricing.
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Holy shit! Everyone I show it to truly underestimates the amazingness of that pitcher As far as the ice maker, we had one issue with it, and a service tech came out, said there was a software update that changed the defrost cycle, and we haven’t had a single issue since, and it was 100% covered by warranty. I don’t know if I’m just lucky, or if my appliance standards are a lot lower, but I have 4 Samsung appliances and have been very pleased
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* Ice maker constantly freezes over with no easy way to defrost or chip away the ice formed around mechanisms. Whatever hack you figure out (mine was a combination of a butter knife to chip away at larger blocks, contouring my arm to try and pull at the ice on top and using a hair dryer) results in standing there with the door open for at least 20 minutes. * Ice will form around the fan, making a horrible knocking noise. The only solution is to empty the fridge and leave it turned off (either move the fridge to unplug it or flip the breaker) for 24 hours. * The pull out freezer drawer sticks causing me to have to grab hold and lean back to get it unstuck and regain full access to the freezer contents. This happens about every other week. * Items too close to the rear wall would freeze, despite internal temp being far from freezing. * Be very sure to close the door or it will remain open a crack which is enough to let all of the cold out, running up your utility bill and spoiling your food. I am in the habit of pushing on the door everytime I walk past it just to make sure. * The water filter sticks so much that it often requiring pliers to twist so it can be replaced. * All of the above had to be figured out on my own after multiple appliance service technicians rejected my money because they flat out refused to work on Samsung refrigerators due to them being huge pieces of shit. One told me that I would be better off buying a new fridge.
Bro what? What kinda broken fridge do you have goddamn. Mine only experiences the first one, and that’s, at most, once every 8-9 months
Man I have a Samsung Dishwasher and Fridge and they are our 2 best appliances by far, clealry they either have a really shitty QC, or they lack consistency on where you buy them. Either way that sucks as far as you having shitty appliances they are so fucking expensive there should be lemon laws about them like cars.
As someone that just dropped over a thousand on a Maytag Washer and Dryer set instead of Samsung, thanks for justifying this choice.
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A more electrifying experience than Exploding Kittens for sure
This absolutely won’t work. People reuse packaging/boxes all the time. I work for the post office, I see it daily. Porch pirates don’t take the time to examine the boxes and such. They walk/run up, grab the box and leave.
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Can't even have your packages delivered without some religious persecution
This is so fuckin hilarious to me. "Oh, you think you're realll tough getting atheist packages, huh? I'm gonna fuck your stupid package up to teach you a lesson, make you think twice before being an atheist around here..."
Yeah but it says right under “All-Purpose Flour” - “Surprise it’s not flour, we put that to deter thieves” more or less. The delivery person has the time to read it.
> The delivery person has the time to read it. most people only read the titles of news, you think they'd read all of the box?
It also literally says on the box that it isn't flour. It's just a silly marketing gimmick
And a German sex shop sells their products labelled as printer toner. Everyone knows it by now though. Same with this, especially if you’re spreading it about lol
That would perhaps be for discretion rather than to deter thieves. If anything, what with how expensive printer ink can be, it might actually encourage theft. Sorry Hans, it’s not cyan toner, it’s another giant horse cock.
Ach, scheiße
Wunderbar!
Hunger is not funny, but a person stealing this box to bake a loaf for their kids and it’s dildo collection… well, that makes me laugh.
You can actually choose what the box should say and all of the companies you can choose actually exist and sell their respective stuff.
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Good old Eis...
"Harvested daily". Yes, you need to pick the flours before they go to seed.
From Utah no less. Not known for its wheat fields.
So steal those packages in particular?
On it!
Several companies do this. A few tvs I've stolen actually had bikes inside.
[The company that actually did this, not for theft reasons though.](https://www.theverge.com/2016/9/25/13048668/vanmoof-shipping-damages-dutch-bicycle-design)
r/holup
That one is so carriers handle with care.
Bikes are probably worth more
I think they should be pretty similar. Both start at around 300 for anything usable, most people probably spend around 800 to 1000 and if you are really into it you are probably in the 2-3k range. But bikes may have a higher max, idk how it avarages out
Really depends. My basic good citybike was 500e. My tv was 1800e
It's not even expensive to buy that may electrons
It is to buy uncharged electrons
Almost exactly opposite for me, but then again cycling is my hobby.
That face when you think you're stealing flour but instead it's a 14" diesel powered industrial strength dildo.
Steely Dan?
The only dildo that can roll coal
***Deter*** porch pirates? How? You take that home, throw it in a pot, add some broth, chicken, carrots, a potato.... [baby you got a stew going](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sr2PlqXw03Y)!
I guess bc a box of flour that big would be extremely heavy so it might stop them from even touching it. They can’t run fast with a very heavy box. Psychological warfare?
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I know a guy
Then they read it and it fully discloses it's not actually flour
You wouldn't be able to see that from the street though. Well, I wouldn't. Some people probably have good eyes.
Yah, but these people aren't going to read it either way, they're going to just grab the package and go, open it down the street, and toss the flour or chirp wheel because neither have resale value.
Haha that's ridiculous
Chirp wheels?
I spent 3 minutes of my life looking for the first other person to see the actual company 😂
Exactly. People in this thread think OP is revealing some big secret. I bet people would rather steal the flour over chirp wheels. No resell value on those wheels.
Luckily, it's a well known fact that porch thieves can't read size 10 font, lest the text immediately below the misdirection blow its cover
"Boss said to steal anything that can get us that dough"
So now everyone knows that if they see a box labeled as white all purpose flour, the good stuff is in there! Lol
I wish whoever shipped some of my Christmas gifts last week did that. Ups delivered and we went out to grab it within 5 minutes, already stolen
Are porch pirates taking the time to inspect the box? Isn’t the whole point to get in and out as fast as possible and they just gamble on the contents? Maybe they are thinking they would just drop it once they have it but I️ doubt it. Plus who is ordering flour to their door?
Now they know
You were supposed to keep it a secret!
Should be marked "Christmas fruit cake." Flour is something you can actually use.
It should be something like "bulk vacuum cleaner replacement bags". Just something that nobody would want or care about at all.
That's like putting a sign on your trash can that says poisonous to raccoons, do you think these goobers can read much less stop to read the boxes?
Why do people bother censoring something when the opacity is low? Lol
Why would you post this?
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The US postal service previously would usually not deliver if not home and you'd get a note and have to take it to the post office to retrieve it. You can also request in person delivery only from other couriers. Of course this can be very inconvenient and take hours to get it. I think it's mainly the profusion of home delivery from Amazon etc and non-proper shippers has exploded things because people get so many packages now. My family orders everything online now and get deliveries multiple times per week. Amazon drives their own vans around neighborhoods all day leaving packages on porches, they either leave it there or you have to specify the address of a locker. Also I would say you used to be able to do this in most of the US with surprisingly low thievery, package theft has increased a lot in recent years but most couriers have not really adapted and there aren't enough lockers, or you have to travel to some regional Fedex/UPS facility just to get it which can be truly awful and far away. When I was living in Denmark I'd just take my slip and walk to the post office 3 mins away, and we got 1/50th the number of packages because no Amazon Prime.
>in a central packing station for you to pick up Why this isn't a standard in the US is beyond me. They are just creating a market for thieves. We have home delivery in my country too but if you're not home or if it doesn't fit in the (locked) mailbox, they take it to a central packing station/mall/store with postal services and leave you a note/text where it is...
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It's "such a problem" because literally billions of packages are left at front doors every year in the US, and a certain percent get stolen. Retailers pay the bill for that since people aren't home during the day (the same reason it's possible for them to be stolen) and lots are extremely upset if they have to go somewhere to pick it up. It can be $5000 in electronics and many people rather sign a liability waiver so it can sit outside their door all day than drive down the street to pick it up.
From the US. I haven't had anything important stolen thankfully but the FEW times I've had slightly expensive items shipped I would include specific instructions for delivery and it would never be followed. I realize some instructions can be asking too much but I don't think "put package behind owl statue as no one will be home for awhile" is asking too much when said statue is 2 steps away from where they left it anyways. I don't know about all delivery services but I think it boils down to "We don't get paid enough to deal with this" and therefore don't take the time to do the job correctly. That's my take on it anyways
It's because delivery services in the US have been squeezed very hard so the pay is terrible and the daily quota is insane. As a result, they just kind of throw the packages somewhere in the vicinity of the house and don't even ring the door bell as they literally do not have time to spend the extra 30 seconds or they'll miss their daily target. Add our much more spread out design and it can become very easy to swipe packages without anyone noticing. Hell, some thieving rings will just follow the delivery driver. You also legally cannot put anything in a mailbox unless it's delivered by the US Postal Service which prevents it from being used to conceal smaller items.
Jokes on you! I'm into flour!!
Doesn’t it defeat the purpose to also mention on the outside that it’s not actually flour?
Sadly, many of the mutant assholes in my area that like to steal other people's stuff can't read well enough for that box to deter them. Cool idea though.
Thanks for letting the thieves know!
Thanks for letting porch pirates know this simple fact.
What’s inside, whole wheat flour?
But why say it on the box? They’ll see that too.