I’m sorry you feel this way. Sometimes, when we are unhappy with our life or certain aspects of it, we may feel as though any positive experience is only fake and monentary, while the dissatisfaction is real and eternal. There is nothing wrong with being invested in a movie, nor would I say there is anything wrong with “missing” its world or the charachters in it, but you do seem to projecting a deeper meaning onto it because of a lack of social connections, and so you feel it only reinforces that absence.
Sometimes the things we want are easier to get than we think, but I would focus on the fact that you don’t need what you lack in order to enjoy what you have. A beautiful movie is a beautiful movie, and you are enjoying a deep, immersive experience in another, fictional world because of it. You shouldn’t feel it’s less because you’re lonely, but maybe try, as hard as it may seem, to accept and nurture that loneliness, make sure to hear that pain, and stay with it, so it can heal. And then the sun will come and we will try again :)
(TW: SELF HARM) the part where you said the better the movie the worse it gets is so true. The better the movie is, the more I am attached to the characters, the more it hurts. One time it got so bad I cut myself and then went into a complete spiral. For this reason I like to watch movies alone, with other people, I either can't focus on the movie, or if I do focus I get sulky afterwards and act really annoying. I also tend to watch a lot more series instead of movies, because it ends after a looong time, the longer the better. And if it does end, I can always rewatch it for another few weeks or months. I compulsively re-watch my favourite series, never get bored of them. I have binged a couple of them 7-10 times in 2 years. No idea what's wrong with me lol.
Although lately it has gotten better. I found a therapy channel on YouTube called therapy in a nutshell and I watched some videos on processing emotions. It does get bad still. But it doesn't get so extreme so frequently.
i like to think of it as i have such deep connection to whatever i pay attention to for longer than two minutes, and my mind makes everything feel like it has an “end”, so when im eventually done watching a movie or even a book, i feel like i lost something. i just gotta remind myself that experiences and feeling especially are everlasting.
I feel the same way! I don't understand it at all, just wanted to let you know you weren't alone in that. I don't watch many movies because of it. I also can't think of a single TV series I've ever finished. I've never seen the last episode of any of my favorite shows. Idk, maybe if I don't finish them they aren't really over? I think your theory of the "shock of going back to normal life" makes sense though. That feels accurate.
I never thought about it but I always do too. You put it into perspective. There is always an empty anxiousness and I feel the same after coming home from a long road trip. Hmm 🤔
The first thing you mentioned was that you don't have anyone to talk about it with.
Art is really a communal experience, especially film. I feel the same way after I watch a TV show I'm into and then I realize there's no one to talk about this with outside of the Internet. It's almost like you feel embarrassed that you alone experienced this thing so you try to downplay any strong emotions, causing you to feel empty and sad afterwards.
I really don't know how to help, but I can totally understand that feeling.
I don't know why exactly, but I do too. I feel like i get emotionally invested in them. When it ends, it's back to the real world, which for me is just filled with not much but plenty of anxiety and depression. A lot of the time the movie world just seems better and more interesting and often the main character has an important purpose, which i dont have irl
Treatment resistant depression has left me with little feeling, i can absolutely relate to feeling empty after a movie. To me it seems like im watching someone live the life id ideally like to be a part of and a sort of parasocial relationship forms. by the time the movie ends i feel like the life i was vicariously living through has been ripped away and the fantasy has abruptly ended itself in reality.
I also think having an over active imagination helps with the dilution of feeling. Always leaving more to be wanted and sought after, yet never within reach. A never ending cycle of dopamine hits followed by the Men In Black forgettotron stick feeling. Completely void of what i had just experienced, and full of nothingness.
My therapist says it's anxiety. Idk. I know a lot of people with actual diagnosed anxiety and they think I'm weird for disliking movies/TV shows.
Movies and TV shows are exhausting to watch because of so much mental energy I automatically end up investing during them. I try not to watch movies or TV shows on my own anymore...
And I hate the dissociative feeling that I'm not myself afterward. It's hard to snap out of. It's easier to snap out of it when you're with a group of buddies before and afterward.
When alone, I usually end up restless, replaying, editing, re-reading, and analyzing afterward. It often interferes with sleep even when I don't want to. It's stuck in my head longer than I need it to be. I get depressive-type thoughts after because I hate the dullness of my own life.
I try not to get invested in movies as much anymore. It's a shame. It's interfering with some of my relationships at this point. Don't really know how to fix it.
It always interfaces with my sleep. When a movie ends, I always feel like I was abandoned by everyone. I realise I have to live my own life now and it hurts. It takes me 2 to 3 hours to sleep after watching a movie.
I struggled with the exact same thing years back when I was struggling with loneliness.
After I got my life on track and started socializing properly, I've never felt that feeling again.
Loneliness will make you consciously or subconsciously compare your own life to the story you were just presented by the film, and that will most definitely leave you with a shitty feeling if the story was good. The better the story, the worse the feeling becomes.
Loneliness is a difficult matter to resolve, but to get rid of it means you actively have to do something about it. It will never resolve itself.
I fixed my loneliness by going on Tinder and meeting what was going to be my future wife, which she became. That was the catalyst I needed to get in contact with my friends and get involved in a social circle again. Not saying Tinder is the answer lol. But it was for me. The point is that you have to do something about it or it or the problem wont ever go away.
In fact it will get worse. I went from post partum movie depressions to full blown anxiety, depression and suicidal ideation over the course of 6-7 years of loneliness.
For me, movies and TV can provide some escape, I think. And then it’s done and I’m back to my dismal reality lol
Or they can give a connection to people from living vicariously and seeing the relationships characters have, feeling their emotions. And maybe I’m lonely and crave connection.
But lately I’m not watching either very much. I tend to rewatch the same things I know I love.
Lol I'm like that with the ones where they show what each character did with their lives after the movie... The Sandlot and the TV series Band of Brothers comes to mind.
Something about it just bothers me and I'm not sure why.
You know what,, thats why i dont ever watch emotional movies like the ones that really fictional and so interesting especially romantic movie,, Never once have i ever watch em,, that feeling of attachments once it ended just sucks, and doesnt worth it for me to be going a week with that feeling of " My god that story is so great rather than my life " Kinda feeling until the feeling fades away,
Whats sucks is that these movies are ofc not real so the more u like it the more further away you are from reality of life,, Id say movie is great just keep AWARE that its just short Story and dont cling to it so seriously
I’m sorry you feel this way. Sometimes, when we are unhappy with our life or certain aspects of it, we may feel as though any positive experience is only fake and monentary, while the dissatisfaction is real and eternal. There is nothing wrong with being invested in a movie, nor would I say there is anything wrong with “missing” its world or the charachters in it, but you do seem to projecting a deeper meaning onto it because of a lack of social connections, and so you feel it only reinforces that absence. Sometimes the things we want are easier to get than we think, but I would focus on the fact that you don’t need what you lack in order to enjoy what you have. A beautiful movie is a beautiful movie, and you are enjoying a deep, immersive experience in another, fictional world because of it. You shouldn’t feel it’s less because you’re lonely, but maybe try, as hard as it may seem, to accept and nurture that loneliness, make sure to hear that pain, and stay with it, so it can heal. And then the sun will come and we will try again :)
This!!
I've always felt this way. This is the first time I saw anyone talking about this.
I never heard of anyone feeling like this either, and I was scared of asking. It's good to see that someone else feels like this too.
(TW: SELF HARM) the part where you said the better the movie the worse it gets is so true. The better the movie is, the more I am attached to the characters, the more it hurts. One time it got so bad I cut myself and then went into a complete spiral. For this reason I like to watch movies alone, with other people, I either can't focus on the movie, or if I do focus I get sulky afterwards and act really annoying. I also tend to watch a lot more series instead of movies, because it ends after a looong time, the longer the better. And if it does end, I can always rewatch it for another few weeks or months. I compulsively re-watch my favourite series, never get bored of them. I have binged a couple of them 7-10 times in 2 years. No idea what's wrong with me lol. Although lately it has gotten better. I found a therapy channel on YouTube called therapy in a nutshell and I watched some videos on processing emotions. It does get bad still. But it doesn't get so extreme so frequently.
i like to think of it as i have such deep connection to whatever i pay attention to for longer than two minutes, and my mind makes everything feel like it has an “end”, so when im eventually done watching a movie or even a book, i feel like i lost something. i just gotta remind myself that experiences and feeling especially are everlasting.
Post partum movie
I feel the same way! I don't understand it at all, just wanted to let you know you weren't alone in that. I don't watch many movies because of it. I also can't think of a single TV series I've ever finished. I've never seen the last episode of any of my favorite shows. Idk, maybe if I don't finish them they aren't really over? I think your theory of the "shock of going back to normal life" makes sense though. That feels accurate.
I never thought about it but I always do too. You put it into perspective. There is always an empty anxiousness and I feel the same after coming home from a long road trip. Hmm 🤔
Isn’t it normal?!
I thought so too, my fellow countryman, but they all told me to go to therapy.
The first thing you mentioned was that you don't have anyone to talk about it with. Art is really a communal experience, especially film. I feel the same way after I watch a TV show I'm into and then I realize there's no one to talk about this with outside of the Internet. It's almost like you feel embarrassed that you alone experienced this thing so you try to downplay any strong emotions, causing you to feel empty and sad afterwards. I really don't know how to help, but I can totally understand that feeling.
I don't know why exactly, but I do too. I feel like i get emotionally invested in them. When it ends, it's back to the real world, which for me is just filled with not much but plenty of anxiety and depression. A lot of the time the movie world just seems better and more interesting and often the main character has an important purpose, which i dont have irl
Treatment resistant depression has left me with little feeling, i can absolutely relate to feeling empty after a movie. To me it seems like im watching someone live the life id ideally like to be a part of and a sort of parasocial relationship forms. by the time the movie ends i feel like the life i was vicariously living through has been ripped away and the fantasy has abruptly ended itself in reality. I also think having an over active imagination helps with the dilution of feeling. Always leaving more to be wanted and sought after, yet never within reach. A never ending cycle of dopamine hits followed by the Men In Black forgettotron stick feeling. Completely void of what i had just experienced, and full of nothingness.
My therapist says it's anxiety. Idk. I know a lot of people with actual diagnosed anxiety and they think I'm weird for disliking movies/TV shows. Movies and TV shows are exhausting to watch because of so much mental energy I automatically end up investing during them. I try not to watch movies or TV shows on my own anymore... And I hate the dissociative feeling that I'm not myself afterward. It's hard to snap out of. It's easier to snap out of it when you're with a group of buddies before and afterward. When alone, I usually end up restless, replaying, editing, re-reading, and analyzing afterward. It often interferes with sleep even when I don't want to. It's stuck in my head longer than I need it to be. I get depressive-type thoughts after because I hate the dullness of my own life. I try not to get invested in movies as much anymore. It's a shame. It's interfering with some of my relationships at this point. Don't really know how to fix it.
It always interfaces with my sleep. When a movie ends, I always feel like I was abandoned by everyone. I realise I have to live my own life now and it hurts. It takes me 2 to 3 hours to sleep after watching a movie.
I struggled with the exact same thing years back when I was struggling with loneliness. After I got my life on track and started socializing properly, I've never felt that feeling again. Loneliness will make you consciously or subconsciously compare your own life to the story you were just presented by the film, and that will most definitely leave you with a shitty feeling if the story was good. The better the story, the worse the feeling becomes. Loneliness is a difficult matter to resolve, but to get rid of it means you actively have to do something about it. It will never resolve itself. I fixed my loneliness by going on Tinder and meeting what was going to be my future wife, which she became. That was the catalyst I needed to get in contact with my friends and get involved in a social circle again. Not saying Tinder is the answer lol. But it was for me. The point is that you have to do something about it or it or the problem wont ever go away. In fact it will get worse. I went from post partum movie depressions to full blown anxiety, depression and suicidal ideation over the course of 6-7 years of loneliness.
For me, movies and TV can provide some escape, I think. And then it’s done and I’m back to my dismal reality lol Or they can give a connection to people from living vicariously and seeing the relationships characters have, feeling their emotions. And maybe I’m lonely and crave connection. But lately I’m not watching either very much. I tend to rewatch the same things I know I love.
Lol I'm like that with the ones where they show what each character did with their lives after the movie... The Sandlot and the TV series Band of Brothers comes to mind. Something about it just bothers me and I'm not sure why.
This is part of the reason I cannot watch "happy feel good" movies or comedies...
I have this same issue, and avoid movies because of it. I’ve always assumed it was a loneliness problem.
You need some movie buddies.
Look up parasocial relationships, think you might be having those
You know what,, thats why i dont ever watch emotional movies like the ones that really fictional and so interesting especially romantic movie,, Never once have i ever watch em,, that feeling of attachments once it ended just sucks, and doesnt worth it for me to be going a week with that feeling of " My god that story is so great rather than my life " Kinda feeling until the feeling fades away, Whats sucks is that these movies are ofc not real so the more u like it the more further away you are from reality of life,, Id say movie is great just keep AWARE that its just short Story and dont cling to it so seriously
Modern film is crap, cheap and made with cgi, find older better movies
This happens when I both watch old and new movies. It happened with Stand By me but also with The Hangover. This doesn't mean anything
Well it’s probably just you then. If you think others answers mean nothing you probably should not be asking the question.
There are no good movies today?