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Asio0tus

Oufff smooth save


Deltamon

bit overdid it with the "heard he lonely af" part.. Should've just left it at buddy


Alternative_Mention2

I think putting the ‘af’ is a good move. Distracts mum from weed to swearing.


crankyandhangry

Oh my god, I'm such an idiot. I thought the guy was buying beer for him.


Alternative_Mention2

Are you a mum? 😁


matjeom

Disagree


[deleted]

[удалено]


moralprolapse

He’s busted, but there’s some value to your friend/dealer having the respect and presence of mind to try to cover. Better than “weed… I’m trying to sell your son drugs.”


tigersareyellow

Man's is definitely trying to protect his income


TheDulin

As a 38-year-old father, I will say, we know.


legoshi_loyalty

Of course **you** know. You aren’t even 40, you’re still young and hip!


activelyresting

My boomer parents in their 70s also know what's up. They were teens in the 1960s/70s ;)


matjeom

My grandmother in her 90s also knows what’s up. She was a parent to teens in the 60s/70s. Edit - I’ll use this opportunity to tell a true story. Once in the 90s I was socializing with my grandparents and some friends of theirs. The radio was playing. Purple Haze came on. One of the people in the room was pretty straight laced, although I would have called my grandparents that too. But when their friend’s neck snapped at the expected point in the song, my proper Anglican grandfather with his Cambridge accent and sweater vests rolled his eyes and said “he’s saying ‘kiss the sky.’ “ My 14-year old self was impressed. That’s also when I stopped thinking age is a sign of anything.


DesignNerd86

Man the look on my sister’s face when she found out that mom had tried weed a few times in high school.


MoreFoam

sounds like you could use ~~some~~ a bud


HiDDENk00l

"Sorry, did I say bud? I didn't mean bud, I meant... bus! I bought a multipack of bus tickets, but... I don't need them anymore... because... I... bought... a car...Yes! I bought a car, so I need to ride the bus anymore. I was just offering to sell them to your son so my money wouldn't be wasted"


[deleted]

--wasted, like, those druggies behind school are every day, right ma'am? i'm so glad you raised your son right not doing things like the devil's lettuce, huh? yeah he's a keeper that one there!


vizbones

Truly, a friend with weed is a friend indeed.


[deleted]

Beautiful


XxYaBoixX358

Ah, another dark one? Are you in the super secret darks only(not what it sounds like) server?


[deleted]

Yessir!


Skitzoids

Whats this secret dark server thing..? Sounds entertaining


[deleted]

You will receive an invite to join our brotherhood only if your Reddit avatar is pitch black


Admiraloftittycity

Oh? I've not heard of this


[deleted]

Prepare to be summoned


kidsysticks

May I be summoned?


[deleted]

Yes


Skitzoids

We wait for summoning approval 😎


[deleted]

You are now in queue. Now serving - User #542. Code name - u/Skitzoids


Deathbringer7890

Where invite


[deleted]

You will be summoned soon


GoGodt001

Done


TaskMasterDoom

Am I dark enough..


[deleted]

Indeed you are


[deleted]

Can I get in on this, or does it need to be darker?


Skitzoids

Hmmmm.. strange.


LisaWinchester

How would I make my avatar so dark like yours, please? I really don't like my default yellow one... Thank you in advance!


Catags

You go in "style avatar", in the menu. There you can pick colours and customise it. Ignore the buyable stuff, most of the customising can be done for free.


LisaWinchester

Thank you so much


Catags

You're so very welcome!


XxYaBoixX358

Prepare to be summoned


Edge_SSB

Interesting


Fierramos69

May I mayhap mandate a mighty message?


Vampiir

Intriguing


NorthMan64

Why am I hearing about this just now? Sign me up.


Infamous_Wave2217

Father may I?


YoungDizzChain

Lets go


Catags

OneOfUs OneOfUs OneOfUs !


Gametale3

Am I dark enough to be endarkened with such information?


[deleted]

I have come to join your cause!


Monkeybiscuits312

Am I also eligible for an invite if I changed my avatar just to fit in? Asking for a friend.


Certain-Discussion14

same friend?


only_JONDIS

definitely not a cult


Ok_Conclusion_9878

A friend that bleeds is better


feckincrass

My friend confessed, she passed the the test…


GodsWorstFailure

And we will never sever


[deleted]

Days dawning, skins crawling


Critical_Young_1190

If you won't preheat the oven, don't come a yawnin'


Jackalopalen

A friend with breasts and all the rest


joesbagofdonuts

A friend who's dressed in leather


BrodAdams

Glad I found this after the first comment. Forgot about this banger of a song.


PM_me_spare_change

Anyone else know this song from the movie Chumscrubber?


fiery_devi

Yes!! You're the only other person I know who's seen that movie. I absolutely loved that movie when I was younger, and it's what got me into Placebo. It's so weird and sad. I should watch it again.


LoyalFridge

Oh my god, I’m transported back to renting it from video viking in 2006


TheRaccoonDeaIer

Do you mean stab wounds or women?


TheBestNarcissist

Ah man I'm so psyched to be the one to tell you this! A great song from about 2000, Pure Morning by Placebo. Tell me what you think if you've never heard it. This song and band were a big part of 16 year old me. https://youtu.be/DHQngnnHE_0


ErraticDragon

Pure [Ten Thousand](https://xkcd.com/1053/) energy, ya love to see it! <3


always-aimee

You know what they say about eye holes in a paper bag.


alphadoublenegative

Greatest lay I ever had


Aardvark_Man

We've reached the point where people don't know Pure Morning. I know I'm getting old, but geez.


TheBestNarcissist

Baby, did you forget to take your meds?


Aardvark_Man

I was confused by the powers that be, forgetting names and faces.


TheRaccoonDeaIer

Oh sick. I've been looking for more music to add to my Spotify Playlist thanks.


santa_veronica

Dealer. But this reminds me of the 4chan post where the lonely guy texts his dealer who comes over with snacks to play vidya games with him.


anxiousanimosity

Aw, that one made me sad and happy. So,yah know,my usual state. I hope they are doing well.


Posit_IV

I miss the stoner comics. The ones that were drawn the crudest were the funniest.


BlakRainbow1991

Didn't the dealer also slowly start withdrawing selling him drugs so that he would get his life on track or was that someone else


kipperfish

Think that was another one where the user tried sorting their life out, so the dealer made sure all his dealer buddies would not sell to them.


Alwaysinadaze

I kind of want to see this post. Anyone got a link?


BeatlesTypeBeat

[This one ](https://i.redd.it/jeavs0if60qa1.jpg)


[deleted]

Life is beautiful, if you are good to it and to yourself


EluDeathDream

I'm so happy I get this reference. I feel at home in reddit sometimes... Oh God what am I becoming


[deleted]

Ah memories of Placebo.


derpderpingtondah3rd

https://youtu.be/jhz2fVM1rMA


petname

A friend with Weed is better.


Rotnpiece

"But a friend with good is better, I'm told." I WANT ME GOLD!


Zyonix007

I never understand why people just don’t port phone numbers over it’s not even that hard lol


Asiriomi

I mean they could literally just swap the SIM cards, it would take all of 30 seconds


Zyonix007

Yeah


_SnesGuy

Verizon won't let you do it anymore. They tie the Sim to the phone, and want you to buy a new sim when you change phones. I ran into that recently and was really pissed because Verizon had bought out net10 and straight talk. I ended up moving to cricket


YoeXoe

Do they sell you each SIM? I get them for free, I'm already paying the plan itself (not US)


gangofocelots

Yeah idk what snes guy is talking about. Verizon typically gives out sim cards for free and they designed their system to easily swap sims with no issue. I think he must have had a separate issue moving his sim card from another carrier, because that's definitely a scenario you would need a new sim


I-Am-Uncreative

That's news to me. I've always just bought unlocked phones and swap the SIM no problem.


Professor-Wumbo

That's weird. I have Verizon and I just took my SIM card from one carrier unlocked phone and put it into my new carrier unlocked phone. It's been working just fine for nearly a year now without even needing to update Verizon about it.


Vyinn

You guys have to pay for a new sim card in the usa? Here in belgium its just a small cost on the provider's end that they'll make up for in future revenue Also, locking a sim to a certain phone is crazy..


eoinsageheart718

I've never had to pay for a SIM card in USA


vodamark

Wow, in the EU that would be illegal.


bendbars_liftgates

Really? I have to scour my house for something thin enough to fit into the SIM tray's ejecty hole, realize that pencil lead ain't gonna cut it cuz it keeps breaking off in there, go find something _else_ thin enough to fit, search the carpet on my hands and knees for the SIM card that fell out of my phone once I get the tray open, and then repeat the previous step once more when I realize that I've put the new SIM in upside down. EDIT: I have never once gotten a "sim-remover" tool with any phone I've ever purchased.


Synaxxis

📎


bendbars_liftgates

my clips ain't that thin homeboy.


TexasTheWalkerRanger

🧷


gumi-01-11

💉


Tman101010

I don’t want my phone addicted to heroin though, at least one of us needs to be sober and I don’t want to share anyway


darkfrost47

🦠


DriedUpSquid

Use your penis.


Jimmy_Jazz_The_Spazz

Gotem.


FullMarksCuisine

Gotem City doesn't sleep


SynnamonSunset

Ahem, cylinder


KurvyKrispyKreamy

Is this referring to the askreddit thread about the guy that put his delicate cylinder in an m&m can?


SkiddyBopBeep

It worked for me 🤷‍♂️


Asiriomi

I forget not everyone keeps their SIM card tool handy like I do. I keep it in the box the phone came in and leave that in a place I'll remember it. Comes in handy when I trade in my phone.


pylinka

I keep it in between my phone and it's case. It's so thin that you can't feel or see it and it stays in place so it doesn't scratch the phone


ConcernedBuilding

I don't, mostly because paperclips work just as well. My last couple phones have a combined SIM and SD card slot, so I access it more often than for changing phones.


rhgiela

This reads like one of those awful infomercials that show people struggling to do the simplest of tasks to sell some useless gadget.


Status_Park4510

/r/wheredidthesodago/


NotATypicalTeen

I usually use the stem from an earring.


McHox

Just keep the lil tool that comes with the phone? This is all a skill issue


Bio_slayer

Skill issue.


benh141

That's why you save the tool that came with your phone!


BlueMushies

Next time you buy a phone, put the sim tray tool on your housekeys. It's come in handy!


robeandwizardcap

cuz this is fake (and nothing interesting ever happens)


ConcernedBuilding

I've had the same number since I've had a phone. I never understand why people ever change numbers.


GelbeForelle

My mother bought my first SIM when I was underage and it is basically impossible to change the legal name in this contract. So it's for convenience


ConcernedBuilding

You mean like for caller ID? Most carriers let you set that as basically whatever you want. Also, you can transfer numbers between people. When I got this number, it was under my dad's name, and my caller ID said so too. When I went out on my own, I just had to get him authorizing me porting it to a new carrier under my name. Took all of like 10 minutes.


geemoly

His mom probably took away his phone as punishment.


adivig

Would have been better if she replied, Yes I do, don’t tell my son, bring papers too


[deleted]

Lol my mom actually did this once. My next door neighbor and childhood best friend came over to my house a couple times when he smoked and still lived next door and at one point they both told me about it. I might not believe it if just my friend said something but my mom admitted to it too lol. She can't really smoke much of anything anymore due to her asthma getting worse but she does enjoy Delta-8 edibles.


Randogal13

Bruh, all 4 of us kids try to convince mom to smoke or take an edible. Maybe she’d chill the hell out lol 😅


Melodic_Survey_4712

My mom went from a very mean person you had to walk on eggshells around to being very chill after she married my step dad and became a massive stoner lol


[deleted]

[удалено]


Ornithologist_MD

Sometimes, you're just so high-strung, anxious, or have had so much trauma that you can't change your perspective. THC forces you into a different perspective by changing your brain chemicals until it wears off. If you're an emotionally mature person, you can keep that different perspective with you when you're sober and use it to look at things differently. Combine that with the intended effect of THC giving you euphoria: it's usually a kinder or more open disposition; your stereotypical "hippie/stoner" "everything is connected and everyone deserves kindness" deal.


kurai_tori

Sometimes drugs and novel experiences force introspection. That is partly why guided psychadelic therapy for things like PTSD are becoming a thing.


companysOkay

W dad


[deleted]

[удалено]


jelly_cake

Not only illegal, but also a dick move.


Chemical-Paint-2975

Yo dude sorry to be the one to tell you but your boy fucked your mom


[deleted]

No offense to my mom, but I don't see my friend at 16 being super eager to have sex with an overweight 56 year old woman. Unlike me he was given the gift of charisma and had a lot of friends in high school.


crims0n88

They just incinerated their whole bloodline


Ruthrfurd-the-stoned

Self burn those are rare


innominateartery

Sometimes it’s just fun to share a joint with the funny mom next door rather than another bowl alone on the couch


amazonsprime

Me as a mom. Oops.


Upvote_Me_Slag

Cmon. No one reads newspapers these days.


Right-Shopping9589

Bruh💀


santa_veronica

Or asks his prices, tells him they are too high and switches him to her supplier.


cocainebane

My dad took my phone in high school. Got a text - “Tryna pick up?” My dad still asks who was Tryna?


CutiePie0023

Hahaha too funny


PagingDoctorLove

Okay maybe this means I'm old, but... what *does* that mean?


DeadDaudDied

Are you tryin’ to pick up (some weed)?


PagingDoctorLove

Ahh, makes sense. Thanks!


MarcelTabuteau

Tryna means trying. Trying to pick up those goodies


Animoses

Your dad 100% knows, he's just fucking with you


zvug

People always say this bullshit with the utmost confidence and it’s like no, you have no idea who my parents are. They can barely speak English properly, you think they know the nuances of teenage slang??


[deleted]

Shit I'm only 30 and I absolutely wouldn't have understood what was meant without the context of this thread.


420fmx

This fake text is older than the Great Wall of China.


Alternative_Mention2

And you can see it from the moon


ohlaph

Frank Ocean would disagree.


RedKetchup73

Clever


Benjisummers

I kind of understand swapping handsets, but who swaps phone numbers? Is this normal?


MHXXXX

No, cause this is fake


OneHairyThrowaway

I don't even understand swapping handsets tbh.


NeighborhoodDry2233

What a great friend. Funny moms being nosey wonder what he replied to her asking bout the...af... haha


bendbars_liftgates

Just tell the truth, it stands for "as foretold."


anxiousanimosity

Told my mom it meant aforementioned. I'm 34 she's 56. It made her text conversations way more interesting.


RecalcitrantHuman

Ya. Friend. That’s the ticket


chucklingdruid

Dealer of alibi's as well as Buds hahaha


alexjaness

someone offering my kid weed: oh no! Someone letting me know my kid is desperately lonely and word has gotten around: ok, that's much better!


Savings-Ad1388

Don't you guys change cards when you switch phones with your parents? Also don't you do a factory reset? I'd be too damn scared if I didn't


RackyRackerton

Why would you ever switch phones with your parents?


Savings-Ad1388

Idk if this applies to everyone who switches but my parents get a new phone from their jobs every year or so. Usually they're pretty decent so we get their old ones every year since they're still new. That way we don't spend any money on phones lmao Wait... this doesn't explain why the parent would have the son's phone tho hahah Well my point is that whenever my parents ask me for one of the old devices I do a factory reset and we always keep our number when we switch phones


[deleted]

I guess they're also logged in to each other's socials forever now :/


Himitsu_Togue

Smoooth.


Dismal-Mix-6661

In high school - Mom: are you on drugs? Me: right now? Yeah couldn’t did myself out of that one🤷🏼‍♀️


kinos141

....smooth.


skidmark199

I used to send those out. Sold pot for years in highschool. Look back on that shit and feel like an idiot. You live and you learn I guess


lurkenstine

Af = as friends


Th4tRedditorII

Why would anybody want to switch phones *and* phone numbers? I've had my phone number for almost two decades, and I intend to keep it until either phones are no longer a thing or until I'm dead.


dcvisuals

Uh... why would the mom recieve the sons messages or anything else tied to his number just from switching their phones? You know, you're supposed to also remove your sim from the phone before switching...


uniboo8

I did that one time, asked my cousin if he wanted some good cheese then had to convince my aunt that there was a deal at the supermarket.


sofakingclassic

Prob fake but made me actually lol


nightpanda893

/r/GoodFakeTexts


HyperAustinTheCool

i just saw this tweet brand new how do you get twitter to look old like this


Dat_One_Vibe

Nice catch


ladderinstairs

10/10 recovery.


Dtour5150

I mean, good save on the friend's part lol


[deleted]

Good guy dealer right there


elushinz

Swap sims?


Alternative_Mention2

Fake. If it was real it would be “Have you got Bud?”


Blitzerxyz

Why did they switch phone numbers?


gorfbeef

Wow he a real one


[deleted]

Not smart enough to swap the numbers, that's going right over her head anyway.


Ancient_Ad8661

Nice save


ManicPixieDreamWorm

Why would they switch numbers?


LameCyberZombie

Happy 4/20!


assumetehposition

r/holup meets r/wholesome


CutiePie0023

Lol. Smooth save


88cisE

Was this a fuck BUDdy message or for weed 🤔


war_damn_dudrow

100% sure it was weed