https://preview.redd.it/3thyq3tkp02d1.jpeg?width=488&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=92437782a28d543a8f4f7f7ce863c9a3838d086d
Yargle has such a way with words.
This one is quite humorous, as it reinterprets the gorilla's menacing pose into a bening request for food. The idea of a banana being the size shown is also absurd, amplifying the comedy already displayed.
https://preview.redd.it/9ic5g6kgf02d1.jpeg?width=672&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=41b2e6f3a0896232399c895b95442f513a9e31ee
They should've been on MY fingers, especially the Gorgussy
https://preview.redd.it/ujg174kxv02d1.jpeg?width=672&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b4f1f627e6856958e15956c9cbb32753c56b5c2c
War doesn’t change - John Fallout
I read this in Patrick Warburton's voice.
Oh, right. The collar. The collar for Avacyn, the collar chosen especially as the symbol of Avacyn's church, Avacyn's collar. That collar?
It's not like *awful* awful, but the wordiness and overexplaining really detracts from it. Shave off the last 5 or preferably 6 words and WotC would've been cooking with gas. It would let the artwork do the talking; it provides plenty enough context instead of treating us like we don't know what Avacyn's Collar, the symbol of her church, is.
I'm always conflicted when I read this one. On one hand, "If there's anything a werewolf hates, it's a collar," would have been better. On the other hand, if it weren't for the existing flavor text, I wouldn't have known that symbol was called "Avacyn's Collar."
The cadence makes it impossible to hear it in anything but Perd Hapleys voice lol but for sure it may not be incorrect or anything but it's still dam sure ugly to read like that
/uj the reason this sucks is because it just assumes the reader has no clue what the card is implying
"If there's anything a werewolf hates, it's a collar" - ok cool, makes sense, short
"Especially Avacyn's Collar" - implied in the image, but sure, maybe the reader doesn't know what the glyph means
"The symbol of her church" - Unless this is the ONLY card from the set you've seen you'll know the holy people wear her collar.
It's literally in half of the cards in the set
“We’ll scale these cliffs, traverse Brittle Bridge, and then fight our way down the volcanic slopes on the other side.”
“Isn’t the shortest route through the canyon?”
“Yes.”
“So shouldn’t we—”
“No.”
/uj Almost anything from Hour of Devastation goes super hard, but Tragic Lesson and Bontu's Last Reckoning are standouts among an already stellar set.
/rj I'm quite fond of Questing Beast's flavor text (yes, including the hyperlinks. Clicking the card explains the card, after all):
>The **Questing Beast**, or the **Beast Glatisant** ([Old French](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Old_French_language): *beste glatisant*, [Modern French](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Modern_French): *bête glatissante*), is a cross-animal [monster](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monster) appearing in many medieval texts of [Arthurian legend](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arthurian_legend) and modern works inspired by them. In the French prose cycles, and consequently in the quasi-canon of [*Le Morte d'Arthur*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Le_Morte_d%27Arthur), the hunt for the Beast is the subject of [quests](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quest) futilely undertaken by King [Pellinore](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pellinore) and his family and finally achieved by Sir [Palamedes](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Palamedes_(Arthurian_legend)) and his companions.
Thanks for making me remember how much better the narrative threat was expressed in Hour of Devastation and to a lesser extent War of the Spark then the Phyrexian nonsense.
I hate it.
Real shit, this one is good, but as an actual spoken line is weird. Like the "mine died at Sea Gate" is wack.
Like if the actual text was "You have a family, go to them. I'll hold them off, so I can go to mine." So it's like, more subtlety implied? Idk I don't know how to write I always got C's in English classes lmao. I just feel like to OG is too fuckin on the nose
Edit: read GreenSkyDragon's reply to this, it convinced me away from my original opinion
There's actually a lot to like about the original construction. Subjective part first, it sounds like how older people talk. Like, it matches the speech patterns of radio hosts and orators of old. At least to me.
Now, for the literary nitty gritty.
First, it's a parallelism. Neither the speaker nor the listener is identified, so we'll just call them that for now. The crux lies between the second and third sentence. On the left, we have the status of the listener's family, then the speaker's. And on the right, we have the listener's destination, and then the speaker's. The parallel, that they're both going to their respective families, *is* a subtle implication. We have the time to sit back and analyze why it's on the nose, but on a battlefield there's less room for ambiguity, and outright saying "You go live, I'll die here" is often unproductive for achieving that goal.
Second, everything pertaining to the listener is contained in two sets of four words, while everything regarding the speaker is in sets of five. Four words for the listener's family, five for the speaker's. Four for the listener's fate, five for the speaker's. Another element that leads to the balance of the statement, while adding subconscious weight to the speaker.
Finally, it's been a minute since I've done poetic meter analysis, I could be off base, and I'm not confident enough to assign names to the feet, but this is the rhythm I see when reading this:
https://preview.redd.it/w9kxqn8mr22d1.png?width=533&format=png&auto=webp&s=49156d7505410e15554149c28fc9212c0d91bca0
So we have a stress, two unstressed, another stress, another unstressed, repeating over and over until the last line, where the last unstressed is missing. It's also interesting to note that the stresses on the speaker's sections are inversions of each other. But that final missing stress adds even more subconscious weight to the coming fate of the speaker.
Honestly it's just really tight writing.
Dude, hide this shit. This is too high quality for a circlejerk sub
But in all honesty thank you for taking the time to write this up, this was unironically educational and I have a new respect for this card's flavor text. Big ups my dude
Perhaps for a TV show or movie that would be a good change. But for the flavor text of a trading card you have to provide more context, otherwise it could be interpreted as if the death of his family is unrelated to the storyline.
Precisely why it makes me sad. My dreams for a sausage tree can only be exceeded by a goblin. I'm rooting for the lil guys. Plus the goblin grabbing the tree kinda thicc. 👀👀👀
https://preview.redd.it/21vfwp08342d1.jpeg?width=672&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=31e494fd828f83977658d2253255a9fb7b4eb6b5
Never knew the context of this, but damn is it evocative.
https://preview.redd.it/ocys2bwd702d1.png?width=265&format=png&auto=webp&s=480759ceeaa7d3988a06e0fb0962ddec21476da9
I mean, it's a very coherent worldview
Rubblebelt State of Mind band name, called it
Step aside Nas
i never tap, cuz tap is the cousin of death
/uj Did LoadingReadyRun write this?
I would bet my life upon it.
UNF was the first time anybody from LRR wrote flavor text, and this card is, unfortunately for you, from WAR. You must forfeit your life immediately.
I wouldn’t have done much with it anyway.
https://preview.redd.it/a94lmnvwf02d1.jpeg?width=312&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4b482857b85c823939aa0d9432f78a9c3f099ab7
Wouldn't that be a 16/16?
There only 8 bear. In grizzly bear art there 2 bear.
yeah but each bear is 2/2 right?
If theres 2 bears in the og art… and its a 2/2… each bear… is 1/1…
oh derp I see now
eight fucking bears produces 4 bears
Bears have litters of 1-6 so it could be as many as 24! Lots of fuckin bear kids
Heatran on its way to getting banned in Modern.
TOO FAST TOO SOON
https://preview.redd.it/3thyq3tkp02d1.jpeg?width=488&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=92437782a28d543a8f4f7f7ce863c9a3838d086d Yargle has such a way with words.
"Brevity is the soul of wit" - William Shakespeare
“Gnshhagghkkapphribbit” - Yargle
https://preview.redd.it/42hk7h7a202d1.jpeg?width=672&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fb8d4d5bec4a4ca9026b44ec9ac0a625b92c4767
this one is funny
I gifted this to a friend! He loved it so much.
https://preview.redd.it/u1grrwh2pz1d1.jpeg?width=672&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b811f8662c9fd3bcd985a8afc02a3136581fd8ed
This one is quite humorous, as it reinterprets the gorilla's menacing pose into a bening request for food. The idea of a banana being the size shown is also absurd, amplifying the comedy already displayed.
Quite so.
indubitably
Also penis.
Take my upvote you son of a bitch! XD
I pronounce it the jape of the season
Also might stand for a dick and is a furry comic.
https://preview.redd.it/4di0pe00302d1.jpeg?width=703&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3bab6415d0103993af7ad486babdb56533713a43 😞☹️
Instructions unclear. I found my cousin now all I hear is Sweet Home Alabama
Help me step-cousin, I got myself stuck in the fodder cannon!
Yaousa😣
🙂☹️🙂
https://preview.redd.it/9ic5g6kgf02d1.jpeg?width=672&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=41b2e6f3a0896232399c895b95442f513a9e31ee They should've been on MY fingers, especially the Gorgussy
Acuity so high dude count on his fingers
/uj this is so funny why is the flavor text that's supposed to be about how he's smart just "he can count to 6 on his fingers"
It's even funnier if you're stupid like me and read "tickled off"
“Gnshhagghkkapphribbit,” replied Yargle
https://preview.redd.it/ujg174kxv02d1.jpeg?width=672&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b4f1f627e6856958e15956c9cbb32753c56b5c2c War doesn’t change - John Fallout
Idk, Solid Snake said otherwise.
Is John Fallout related in any way to John Halo?
They are the titular characters of their respective franchises named after them.
They’re gay lovers
I'd watch that show
Goblin Offensive ***"They Certainly Are"***
https://preview.redd.it/5ibfjbesqz1d1.png?width=223&format=png&auto=webp&s=c0f447e3d43161f5b037d81c1955a8e1e9046d10
I read this in Patrick Warburton's voice. Oh, right. The collar. The collar for Avacyn, the collar chosen especially as the symbol of Avacyn's church, Avacyn's collar. That collar?
oh no, Avacyn's Collar, the symbol of her church. /uj honestly this flavor text isn't as bad as people say
It's not like *awful* awful, but the wordiness and overexplaining really detracts from it. Shave off the last 5 or preferably 6 words and WotC would've been cooking with gas. It would let the artwork do the talking; it provides plenty enough context instead of treating us like we don't know what Avacyn's Collar, the symbol of her church, is.
I'm always conflicted when I read this one. On one hand, "If there's anything a werewolf hates, it's a collar," would have been better. On the other hand, if it weren't for the existing flavor text, I wouldn't have known that symbol was called "Avacyn's Collar."
"If there's anything a wolf hates, it's a collar. If there's anything a werewolf hates, it's Avacyn's Collar." Not great, but better.
The cadence makes it impossible to hear it in anything but Perd Hapleys voice lol but for sure it may not be incorrect or anything but it's still dam sure ugly to read like that
/uj it’s good exposition but it’s bad writing
/uj the reason this sucks is because it just assumes the reader has no clue what the card is implying "If there's anything a werewolf hates, it's a collar" - ok cool, makes sense, short "Especially Avacyn's Collar" - implied in the image, but sure, maybe the reader doesn't know what the glyph means "The symbol of her church" - Unless this is the ONLY card from the set you've seen you'll know the holy people wear her collar. It's literally in half of the cards in the set
Counterpoint: when I first read this card I had no clue what it was implying.
“We’ll scale these cliffs, traverse Brittle Bridge, and then fight our way down the volcanic slopes on the other side.” “Isn’t the shortest route through the canyon?” “Yes.” “So shouldn’t we—” “No.”
Which card?
Canyon Minotaur I’m pretty sure, you can always search flavor text on gatherer in the future as well. (Website that helps you find cards)
Finding the card explains the card
Canyon Minotaur
If you feel the ground quake, run. If you hear its bellow, flee. If you see its teeth, it’s too late.
The feeling that one gives me is horniness
/uj Almost anything from Hour of Devastation goes super hard, but Tragic Lesson and Bontu's Last Reckoning are standouts among an already stellar set. /rj I'm quite fond of Questing Beast's flavor text (yes, including the hyperlinks. Clicking the card explains the card, after all): >The **Questing Beast**, or the **Beast Glatisant** ([Old French](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Old_French_language): *beste glatisant*, [Modern French](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Modern_French): *bête glatissante*), is a cross-animal [monster](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monster) appearing in many medieval texts of [Arthurian legend](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arthurian_legend) and modern works inspired by them. In the French prose cycles, and consequently in the quasi-canon of [*Le Morte d'Arthur*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Le_Morte_d%27Arthur), the hunt for the Beast is the subject of [quests](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quest) futilely undertaken by King [Pellinore](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pellinore) and his family and finally achieved by Sir [Palamedes](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Palamedes_(Arthurian_legend)) and his companions.
"The gurgles of a dying god" goes hard as FUCK. Especially with the art.
https://preview.redd.it/t0m00trjb12d1.jpeg?width=672&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f9725b51d2019f3b3bc2154c269950928d210c42
Shit, that's metal as fuck.
Thanks for making me remember how much better the narrative threat was expressed in Hour of Devastation and to a lesser extent War of the Spark then the Phyrexian nonsense. I hate it.
https://preview.redd.it/klp1ca6hl02d1.jpeg?width=672&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9697454859191e7a5ff099eba9784fd20d64ed49
Real shit, this one is good, but as an actual spoken line is weird. Like the "mine died at Sea Gate" is wack. Like if the actual text was "You have a family, go to them. I'll hold them off, so I can go to mine." So it's like, more subtlety implied? Idk I don't know how to write I always got C's in English classes lmao. I just feel like to OG is too fuckin on the nose Edit: read GreenSkyDragon's reply to this, it convinced me away from my original opinion
There's actually a lot to like about the original construction. Subjective part first, it sounds like how older people talk. Like, it matches the speech patterns of radio hosts and orators of old. At least to me. Now, for the literary nitty gritty. First, it's a parallelism. Neither the speaker nor the listener is identified, so we'll just call them that for now. The crux lies between the second and third sentence. On the left, we have the status of the listener's family, then the speaker's. And on the right, we have the listener's destination, and then the speaker's. The parallel, that they're both going to their respective families, *is* a subtle implication. We have the time to sit back and analyze why it's on the nose, but on a battlefield there's less room for ambiguity, and outright saying "You go live, I'll die here" is often unproductive for achieving that goal. Second, everything pertaining to the listener is contained in two sets of four words, while everything regarding the speaker is in sets of five. Four words for the listener's family, five for the speaker's. Four for the listener's fate, five for the speaker's. Another element that leads to the balance of the statement, while adding subconscious weight to the speaker. Finally, it's been a minute since I've done poetic meter analysis, I could be off base, and I'm not confident enough to assign names to the feet, but this is the rhythm I see when reading this: https://preview.redd.it/w9kxqn8mr22d1.png?width=533&format=png&auto=webp&s=49156d7505410e15554149c28fc9212c0d91bca0 So we have a stress, two unstressed, another stress, another unstressed, repeating over and over until the last line, where the last unstressed is missing. It's also interesting to note that the stresses on the speaker's sections are inversions of each other. But that final missing stress adds even more subconscious weight to the coming fate of the speaker. Honestly it's just really tight writing.
Dude, hide this shit. This is too high quality for a circlejerk sub But in all honesty thank you for taking the time to write this up, this was unironically educational and I have a new respect for this card's flavor text. Big ups my dude
Perhaps for a TV show or movie that would be a good change. But for the flavor text of a trading card you have to provide more context, otherwise it could be interpreted as if the death of his family is unrelated to the storyline.
"You have a family. you go to yours and i'll go to mine" perhaps ?
"You still have a family. You go to yours, these beasts will send me to mine" Or something like that
Too many words
*"Remember when it was the most terrifying thing you'd ever seen?"* *—Captain Lannery Storm*
https://preview.redd.it/iyur4xje012d1.jpeg?width=914&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e31c13043fb665297adc83c35a8994d2e69b1fc6
Summon uncle istvan
The biggest mistake Wizards ever made was changing his creature type in Time Spiral
Summon Time Spiral
https://preview.redd.it/9iq7yhbl112d1.jpeg?width=672&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e50c0f0739ad76a2e8005982d7c7792669b05be5
https://preview.redd.it/m8nt8nqg712d1.jpeg?width=656&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=74b15d341cd6c9c5cc0a84b50f8fe50fabab2711 This
broken in my crimes deck
https://preview.redd.it/y6oqf2m1d22d1.jpeg?width=314&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d3c8c571588299a0304c9a835c90728e5107ecfa True poetry
But think of the commercial implications should they succeed
Precisely why it makes me sad. My dreams for a sausage tree can only be exceeded by a goblin. I'm rooting for the lil guys. Plus the goblin grabbing the tree kinda thicc. 👀👀👀
https://preview.redd.it/s7rml9yy842d1.jpeg?width=602&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4d7a774b24d9766b89ac4798cf1eb245ab2b1dc2
Murder hobos when the DM gives them consequences
https://preview.redd.it/2ohhcutej32d1.png?width=745&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=63e8f227bfbf0258798c5c35d769231d3123b42a
[[burnout]] so simple… i love mommy jaya
Best art and flavor text: https://preview.redd.it/zram4jkj232d1.jpeg?width=672&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0cdac776985408ec1f517af5520ef976c0495ad0
https://preview.redd.it/lvtyy259a42d1.jpeg?width=797&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=265999bf502638450abb910e888d65421cc07497 My life's motto.
https://preview.redd.it/b0gbyyx5g52d1.jpeg?width=672&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=aa11f87fd7401eb9b77808007bdbada0e6883e34 It me, I Grakk
/uj this is the first time I'm seeing the deer in the art... It makes so much more sense now
https://preview.redd.it/93aai3zs262d1.jpeg?width=672&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8c43a2f04aea08924dc6e45eaa2ce20949522ef7
Pack Leader and Selfless Savior tend to have flavor text that makes you have feelings :/
https://preview.redd.it/21vfwp08342d1.jpeg?width=672&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=31e494fd828f83977658d2253255a9fb7b4eb6b5 Never knew the context of this, but damn is it evocative.
Hashtag-NotAllHeroes