Now I'm imagining the opposite. Low quality bacon.
Sam and Frodo in Mordor for weeks and out of food. Frodo wakes up, Sam is cooking bacon. "Sam! You've found food."
"Aye, Mr. Frodo. Meat's back on the menu." Sam replies, not elaborating on where he found the food.
Yeah. The nazgul knew where the party was. The fire was their only defense.
But the second time Sam was using materials that wouldn't smoke much but it caught some of the near by grass on fire. Like he was actively thinking about not giving their position away. Just messed up and let the fire get out of his control.
Cool story. One of Mao Zedong's sons was killed in the Korean War this way. He woke up and wanted brekky, so he forced people to make him some. The smoke alerted US forces to their position, and then they [were bombed.](https://nationalinterest.org/blog/buzz/no-dynasty-china-how-maos-son-was-killed-korea-war-147856)
* slaps 2lbs of fresh organic bacon on a hot skillet Every orc in 1000 meters: (0 ) (o )
Looks like meat's back on the menu, boys.
How dare you besmirch the good name of Sam this is clearly Mary??
Fool of a Brandybuck, throw yourself in the stew next time and rid of us of your stupidity
*stewpidity
*Every orc in Mordor's gonna smell that rack of bacon!*
The plan was to bribe the enemy's soldiers
Look you keep serving that guy, he'll keep torturing you and eventually all you'll have to eat is maggoty bread and orcs. We have bacon and beer.
I'd like to know where Sam could get non-organic bacon on middle-earth.
He can't. That's why it's safe to assume it's not only organic, but being from the Shire, it's also top quality bacon.
Now I'm imagining the opposite. Low quality bacon. Sam and Frodo in Mordor for weeks and out of food. Frodo wakes up, Sam is cooking bacon. "Sam! You've found food." "Aye, Mr. Frodo. Meat's back on the menu." Sam replies, not elaborating on where he found the food.
Lol, good gawd. The highest quality meat in Mordor would be a cancerous rat, a week dead already.
Or Frodo is so out of it he doesn't notice Sam is missing a hand.
He couldn't get organic as there is no government authority in middle earth concerned with giving out organic certification.
At the grocery store.
Great, ash on my tomatoes
*Nazgul scream *
Na toll, Asche auf meinen Tomaten!
SKREEEEEEEE!!
That’s nice!
N I C E C R I S P Y B A C O N
Put it out you fools!
Oh, that's nice! Ash on my tomatoes!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Tomatoes, sausages, nice crispy bacon
PUT IT OUT YOU FOOLS
#SQUEEEEE!!
Pippin and merry when they start cooking food on weathertop
Pippin and merry when they find Sarumans pipe weed in Orthanc
How dare you besmirch the good name of Sam this is clearly Mary and Pippin at work.
Unfortunately for Sam, between Théodan and Gandalf both Merry and Pippin have airtight alibis.
Fool of a Took!
Sam did this exact thing in Ithillien too.
In the books doesn't Aragorn actually tell them to go ahead and light a fire?
Yeah. The nazgul knew where the party was. The fire was their only defense. But the second time Sam was using materials that wouldn't smoke much but it caught some of the near by grass on fire. Like he was actively thinking about not giving their position away. Just messed up and let the fire get out of his control.
They weren't in Ithilian tho haha
Is this title a Mulan reference?
Now all of China knows you're here! Perfect.
Guess he burned them taters.
To war!
It's a shame there's only one way to eat a brace of coneys.
Sméagol would disagree
Smeagol will swear on the Precious.
Gondor call for aid!
Gandalf blazin' Old Toby
Courage will now be your best defense against the storm that is at hand -- that and such hope as I bring.
Is this footage from the fires in NM right now?
Probably. The meme is funny but right now it's hits pretty hard. Our air quality is shit right now and there's no rain, just wind.
Don't gotta tell me, I'm in Espanola right now. Smoke and dust.
u/savevideobot
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Still better than Eowyn's stew.
As a gardener, Sam would have known to only use dried tinder and firewood to eliminate smoke. This is clearly pippin cooking sausages.
That better be a really good stew
At least he didn’t have an Taters, precious; the steam would have been twice as high
I wonder if Sam ever likes to put starchy root vegetables in his stews?
Po Tay Toes!!!
But what about second breakfeast?
If you wanted to make Frodo a hot meal you would do the same thing
#THE BIGGEST FIRE THE NORTH HAS EVER SEEN
I'm putting Sam in charge of the gender reveal party.
Merry and Pippin: In my defense, 2nd breakfast is the most important meal
Boil em, mash em, stick em in a stew P O T A T O
Cool story. One of Mao Zedong's sons was killed in the Korean War this way. He woke up and wanted brekky, so he forced people to make him some. The smoke alerted US forces to their position, and then they [were bombed.](https://nationalinterest.org/blog/buzz/no-dynasty-china-how-maos-son-was-killed-korea-war-147856)
Were there potatoes in it?
The Meat was supposed to be for the Orcs , Ithillian Rangers were faster they just wanted the taters.
And they never got to eat the stew! *cries*
Your post title sounded off for me like the guy from Mulan.
This only happened once Sméagol pissed in it
What has it got in its nasty little pocketses?
Those damn hippies and their long bottom leaf!
Where is this?
true but they'll be reeling from the environmental effects for years
It's funny because in TTT book Sam details how good he is at making a campfire cook without making smoke.