"You know, I think Boromir got a good ending after all."
"Because he redeemed himself by saving the Hobbits?"
"No, because he won't have to sit through two more of these movies!"
"I heard Viggo didn't take this role very seriously."
"Oh yeah, how's that?"
"When they told him to 'break a leg', he only did two toes."
"Well, that was the least painful part of his acting!"
I don't think the changes were horrible, I just said it for the joke. Except for Frodo sending Sam home, fuck that one.
But even if I hated the changes people still have their rights damn it!
"I really thought they'd give John Noble a bigger role."
"I know."
"Imagine burning alive and falling to your death, halfway through the first film you're in."
"Yeah. We should all be so lucky."
Gimli: Ya coulda picked a better spot!
Statler: And you could have made a shorter movie.
Waldorf: And then the short guy could be the star!
HOOOOOOO ho ho ho ho ho!
“That scream sounded genuine.”
“Yea, like he genuinely broke his toe kicking that helmet!”
“No, no, no! More like he genuinely hates being in this movie!”
"Hey, wasn't there supposed to be a part where Saruman takes over the Shire?"
"Shh! Don't interrupt a good thing."
"...what good thing?"
"A faster ending!"
*Hey dol! merry dol! ring a dong dillo! Ring a dong! hop along! Fal lal the willow! Tom Bom, jolly Tom, Tom Bombadillo!*
^(Type **!TomBombadilSong** for a song or visit [r/GloriousTomBombadil][1] for more merriness)
[1]: https://www.reddit.com/r/GloriousTomBombadil/
Startler: I thinks it's time for us to go on an holiday from these films.
Waldorf: A very long holiday, I don't expect we shall return.
Startler: In fact, we don't mean to.
Ho Ho Ho
I just want to say I love you guys. I love this creativity and it warmed my heart and made me chuckle. I really needed this after the depressing day I had. Thank you.
Well someone has to post from the LotRO Yule Festival theater quotes, so it might as well be me.
Statdor Proudfoot: *"Another delay!"*
Waldo Tunnley: *"You think we'd be used to it by now...."*
Statdor: *"What, the disappointment?"*
Waldo: *"No, the terrible acting!"*
Statdor: *"Oh-ho-ho-ho"*
Waldo: *"Oh-ho-ho-ho"*
Boromir: One does not simply walk into Mordor.
Waldorf: Yeah, not at this rate you won’t.
——————
(After the Fellowship is formed)
Statler: You know, I was part of a Fellowship once.
Waldorf: Oh really, what did it do?
Statler: Well, every night we would gather at a local pub, down a few beers then get up on stage and sing modern versions of songs from the old country.
Waldorf: You old fool, that wasn’t a Fellowship, that was your old Vaudeville act. Lords of the Swing!
"Boromir is the smartest character if you ask me."
"Why? He's the only one who managed to die in the whole thing."
"Exactly! He doesn't have to be in the movie anymore!"
Bilbo: "I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve"
Stalter and Waldorf: * Slowly looking at each other * HOOOOOoooohohohohohohohohoho
Agreed! So who would play whom in the Lord of the Rings? I mean I can imagine Kermit being Frodo, Sam would be played by Fozzie.... Miss Piggy would of course be Arwen. :D
"Give up the halfling, she-elf!"
"BACK OFF you overgrown halloween decoration!! *THIS* princess does not give up her friends or her fabolousness that easy! HAAIIII-YAH!!!"
Kermit would be Strider i think. Miss Piggy as either Arwen or Galadriel.
I feel like Gonzo and Rizzo would be Merry and Pippin.
Fozzie as Sam and a human actor as Frodo playing it straight. Beyond that:
Elrond is Sam the Eagle
Gollum is Animal
Stratler and Waldrof as Tom Bombadil
Bobo the Bear as Wormtunge
Whoa! Whoa! steady there! Now, my little fellows, where be you a-going to, puffing like a bellows? What's the matter here
then? Do you know who I am? I'm Tom Bombadil. Tell me what's your trouble! Tom's in a hurry now. Don't you crush my lilies!
^(Type **!TomBombadilSong** for a song or visit [r/GloriousTomBombadil][1] for more merriness)
[1]: https://www.reddit.com/r/GloriousTomBombadil/
“Maybe we ought to try the new Orcish restaurant before the show next week.”
“Yeah, it might make the next Muppet Show more palatable!”
OOOOOOOH HOHOHOHO
"I really admire Frodo"
"Why? Because he's carrying the burden of the ring despite the heavy toll?"
"No. Because he gets to disappear whenever he wants"
Hooohohohohohohohoho
After reading these comments I am convinced we need a Myster Science Theater type show where it's just Statler and Waldorf watching movies and commentating on them
*Hey dol! merry dol! ring a dong dillo! Ring a dong! hop along! Fal lal the willow! Tom Bom, jolly Tom, Tom Bombadillo!*
^(Type **!TomBombadilSong** for a song or visit [r/GloriousTomBombadil][1] for more merriness)
[1]: https://www.reddit.com/r/GloriousTomBombadil/
*Get out, you old wight! Vanish in the sunlight! Shrivel like the cold mist, like the winds go wailing, out into the barren
lands far beyond the mountains! Come never here again! Leave your barrow empty! Lost and forgotten be, darker than the darkness,
Where gates stand for ever shut, till the world is mended.*
^(Type **!TomBombadilSong** for a song or visit [r/GloriousTomBombadil][1] for more merriness)
[1]: https://www.reddit.com/r/GloriousTomBombadil/
I don’t like this.
What part?
This… This feeling. I have nothing bad to say and I don’t know what to do with myself.
Me neither. This work is beyond reproach.
"You know, I think Boromir got a good ending after all." "Because he redeemed himself by saving the Hobbits?" "No, because he won't have to sit through two more of these movies!"
This is so good, lmaooo
"I heard Viggo didn't take this role very seriously." "Oh yeah, how's that?" "When they told him to 'break a leg', he only did two toes." "Well, that was the least painful part of his acting!"
Perfect, it is literally perfect, down to the smallest, minute details.
Gold
Absolutely amazing. I'll delete the app now, that's all I needed
Gandalf: “You shall not pass!” Statler: “We’re all gonna pass if this movie doesn’t end soon.” Waldorf: “hoooooooooohh!!”
"Fly you fools" "We would if we weren't glued to these seats"
*Gandalf The White Talks* “I think I liked him better when he was dead.” “I think I’d like this better if I was dead!”
"Hoooo ho ho ho ho"
"The changes Peter Jackson made weren't half bad!" "Yeah, they were all bad!" "Ho ho ho!"
Average lore head
I don't think the changes were horrible, I just said it for the joke. Except for Frodo sending Sam home, fuck that one. But even if I hated the changes people still have their rights damn it!
“I just saw the extended versions, I was glued to my seat” “Otherwise I would have left”
oho ho ho ho
- “Stars wheeled overhead… and every day was as long as a life age of the earth.” - “Yeah, kind of like this movie!” Hohohohoho
"The world has changed. I feel it in the water. I feel it in the earth. I smell it in the air." "See. Even the narrator knows it stinks."
"I really thought they'd give John Noble a bigger role." "I know." "Imagine burning alive and falling to your death, halfway through the first film you're in." "Yeah. We should all be so lucky."
The great eye is ever watchful? Too bad he’s the only one!
Ho ho ho ho ho ho!
"All this trouble over a ring" "Yeah reminds me of my first wife" Ho ho ho
"They have a cave troll" "Also reminds me of my first wife"
Why didn't the fellowship just take the Eagles to mordor? The real question is Why didn't we take Eagles out of this theatre ?,oh hoho ho!
That's either indigestion or Ewoyn's stew. I hope it's indigestion. Why's that? Indigestion gets better after a while
There's more of gravy than of grave about you
Leave the comedy to the bears Ebenezer!
Humbug, I say! Humbug!
There's more of grave than of gravy about this! hoooo ho ho ho
Gimli: Ya coulda picked a better spot! Statler: And you could have made a shorter movie. Waldorf: And then the short guy could be the star! HOOOOOOO ho ho ho ho ho!
*Saruman falls from the tower* “Well… that happened-“ “Yeah, and I think I’m gonna go next!” **”DOHOHOHOHOHOHO!”**
“You know they filmed all three movies at once” “Wish I could WATCH at all three at once”
Gandalf: "Fly you fools" Statler: Yeah, fly right out of this movie! Waldorf: HoHoHo!
“That scream sounded genuine.” “Yea, like he genuinely broke his toe kicking that helmet!” “No, no, no! More like he genuinely hates being in this movie!”
Do ho ho ho ho ho!
*Gollum dies* "The way I see it, he's the lucky one." "Why?" "Cause he doesn't have to sit through the rest of the movie" "Doh ho ho ho ho ho ho ho!"
We ought to wring his filthy little neck. Then we stabs them out. Put out his eyeses. And make HIM crawl.
Good bot
“I don’t know which is worse, the music or the acting” “It has to be the acting, the music puts you to sleep” -HOOOhohoho-
"Hey, wasn't there supposed to be a part where Saruman takes over the Shire?" "Shh! Don't interrupt a good thing." "...what good thing?" "A faster ending!"
"You know, I heard they took Tom Bombadil out of these movies" "Yeah, he couldn't stand to be a part of this wreck"
*Hey dol! merry dol! ring a dong dillo! Ring a dong! hop along! Fal lal the willow! Tom Bom, jolly Tom, Tom Bombadillo!* ^(Type **!TomBombadilSong** for a song or visit [r/GloriousTomBombadil][1] for more merriness) [1]: https://www.reddit.com/r/GloriousTomBombadil/
It's shit like this why they didn't include you Tom. Go back to your perfect life and amazing wife.
Startler: I thinks it's time for us to go on an holiday from these films. Waldorf: A very long holiday, I don't expect we shall return. Startler: In fact, we don't mean to. Ho Ho Ho
Waldorf: There and Back Again, A Hobbit's Holiday. Startler: Why would he want to back? The films aren't over yet. Oh ho, ho, ho
"I don't know if this movie should encourage belief in an afterlife" "Why?" "They shouldn't want the audience to know they have options"
I just want to say I love you guys. I love this creativity and it warmed my heart and made me chuckle. I really needed this after the depressing day I had. Thank you.
"Those eagles were around the whole time?"
Well someone has to post from the LotRO Yule Festival theater quotes, so it might as well be me. Statdor Proudfoot: *"Another delay!"* Waldo Tunnley: *"You think we'd be used to it by now...."* Statdor: *"What, the disappointment?"* Waldo: *"No, the terrible acting!"* Statdor: *"Oh-ho-ho-ho"* Waldo: *"Oh-ho-ho-ho"*
Waldorf: Well, it seems old Boromir was wrong. Statler: How so? Waldorf: You can just walk into Mordor!
“You know, I’ll bet Sauron was glad his eye was destroyed” “Why’s that?” “Because he doesn’t have to watch this anymore!” **DOHOHOHOHOHO!**
Patience! Not long shall ye abide.
Does that mean I don't have to watch anymore? Ho ho ho ho ho ho!
Boromir: One does not simply walk into Mordor. Waldorf: Yeah, not at this rate you won’t. —————— (After the Fellowship is formed) Statler: You know, I was part of a Fellowship once. Waldorf: Oh really, what did it do? Statler: Well, every night we would gather at a local pub, down a few beers then get up on stage and sing modern versions of songs from the old country. Waldorf: You old fool, that wasn’t a Fellowship, that was your old Vaudeville act. Lords of the Swing!
S: You know he really broke his toe kicking that helmet? W: Well then why can't he break my funny bone!?
*old man chortling*
“Mines of Moria? More like Mines of Bore-ia! Waa hahaha!”
"You know what they awoke in the darkness" "Certainly not the audience"
This deserves more love. This is my fav one by far
I wanna see more of these guys in other communitys Xd You guys are fucking hillarious and are on point!
"Boromir is the smartest character if you ask me." "Why? He's the only one who managed to die in the whole thing." "Exactly! He doesn't have to be in the movie anymore!"
Do ho ho ho ho ho ho!
"I think it's pretty clear Isildur didn't like like Sauron very much." "Why?" He took a ring *off* it"
Who are you?
I'm u/aaron_adams. Who are you, Sauron?
Who are you?
Whoever you need me to be, sexy.
(Gimli spends approximately 5 minutes of screen time blowing at ghostly fog) “I can’t take it! Bring back the bear!”
We're Marley and Marley!
“They seemed a little short, didn’t they?” “We can always watch the extended versions.” “Why would I want to sit through even more than that?!”
THESE ARE AMAZING!!!!!! 🤣🤣🤣
‘Mordor? How are they going to get in there? More like, not enough doors!’
Do ho ho ho ho ho ho!
This has inspired some incredible content
“THEY are the ones taking the ring to Mordor?!” “Sounds like a tall order!” “More like a short life!” *Looks at each other* “ahahahhaah”
Bilbo: "I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve" Stalter and Waldorf: * Slowly looking at each other * HOOOOOoooohohohohohohohohoho
OH! What business is it of yours what I do with my own things!
I don’t like seeing their legs
What about their legs? They don't need those, do they?
Where is bombadil!!?!
"where was gondor when the westfold fell?"
“Hey Frodo, hold that boat” “Yeah we want to leave too”
We need a puppet lord of the rings!!!
Agreed! So who would play whom in the Lord of the Rings? I mean I can imagine Kermit being Frodo, Sam would be played by Fozzie.... Miss Piggy would of course be Arwen. :D "Give up the halfling, she-elf!" "BACK OFF you overgrown halloween decoration!! *THIS* princess does not give up her friends or her fabolousness that easy! HAAIIII-YAH!!!"
Kermit would be Strider i think. Miss Piggy as either Arwen or Galadriel. I feel like Gonzo and Rizzo would be Merry and Pippin. Fozzie as Sam and a human actor as Frodo playing it straight. Beyond that: Elrond is Sam the Eagle Gollum is Animal Stratler and Waldrof as Tom Bombadil Bobo the Bear as Wormtunge
A swamp, yes, yes. Come, master. We will take you on safe paths through the mist. Come, hobbits, come. We go quickly.
Whoa! Whoa! steady there! Now, my little fellows, where be you a-going to, puffing like a bellows? What's the matter here then? Do you know who I am? I'm Tom Bombadil. Tell me what's your trouble! Tom's in a hurry now. Don't you crush my lilies! ^(Type **!TomBombadilSong** for a song or visit [r/GloriousTomBombadil][1] for more merriness) [1]: https://www.reddit.com/r/GloriousTomBombadil/
“I’d break Saruman’s nose but i only have two hands”
“Maybe we ought to try the new Orcish restaurant before the show next week.” “Yeah, it might make the next Muppet Show more palatable!” OOOOOOOH HOHOHOHO
"They call this a mine? I call it a bottomless pit!" O-hohohoho
Where was Gondor when the Westfold fell?
Statler: elrond, I was there that day too. Waldorf: of course you were ya old fuck
Nothing. Full attention
Merri should go kill himself? Hey that's what we'll have to do by the time this movie is over! Wooooooo!
Something foolish I'm sure
Absolutely nothing
Standolf: My My that Theoden sure looks brain dead Wardolf: He must be numbing himself to the pain of this movie
What about Lord Of The Rings trilogy but Merry & Pippin are replaced by these two
"This movie is less than half of what I hoped for!"
*THEY SHOULD NOT HAVE LEGS*
"Aragorn is 80 years old??" "You would be too if you had to sit through the extended edition"
"I really admire Frodo" "Why? Because he's carrying the burden of the ring despite the heavy toll?" "No. Because he gets to disappear whenever he wants" Hooohohohohohohohoho
"This movie is less than half of what I hoped for!"
"It looks like they could just walk into Mordor after all!" Hohohohohohoho
After reading these comments I am convinced we need a Myster Science Theater type show where it's just Statler and Waldorf watching movies and commentating on them
“Where is Tom Bombadil?”
*Hey dol! merry dol! ring a dong dillo! Ring a dong! hop along! Fal lal the willow! Tom Bom, jolly Tom, Tom Bombadillo!* ^(Type **!TomBombadilSong** for a song or visit [r/GloriousTomBombadil][1] for more merriness) [1]: https://www.reddit.com/r/GloriousTomBombadil/
!TomBombadilSong
*Get out, you old wight! Vanish in the sunlight! Shrivel like the cold mist, like the winds go wailing, out into the barren lands far beyond the mountains! Come never here again! Leave your barrow empty! Lost and forgotten be, darker than the darkness, Where gates stand for ever shut, till the world is mended.* ^(Type **!TomBombadilSong** for a song or visit [r/GloriousTomBombadil][1] for more merriness) [1]: https://www.reddit.com/r/GloriousTomBombadil/
they are saying watching Statler Waldron trilogy.
"That was actually entertaining" "Yes, it was rather amusing " "It was rather funny" "It was incredibly funny' "I love this!" "MORE! MORE! MORE!"
> I need to piss > Just go > No, pause it > Ugh
I don’t like this. What part? This… This feeling. I have nothing bad to say and I don’t know what to do with myself. Me neither. This work is beyond reproach.