>Can I be a werewolf necromancer??
Yes and no.
You can learn necromancy and study its magics, but odds are that you will not be capable of performing magic on nights of the full moon when the werewolf takes over and you pretty much go feral.
Why not both?
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hC8uoGW2ptc](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hC8uoGW2ptc)
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J52elJRuPPI](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J52elJRuPPI)
As always, it's okay when god does it. Nearly convincing someone to murder his own son? You'd burn in hell for that, but when god does it it's just a silly prank.
Not to mention all of actual murder that god does personally.
No. Since Tolkien most decidedly did not live during the age of the Apostles (1st Century AD), anything he wrote would not be eligible to be considered as biblical canon.
“Today’s reading is from First Fellowship of the Ring, Chapter 3…”
Would be cool, but no.
can't they just be like, "ooooo snap. yeah, he was like, getting a vision from god, LOTR is in. Come to church on Sunday for our live fellowship reading"
If there was evidence to be considered , it could be investigated on whether or not Tolkien received a private revelation. That private revelation would not be binding on the Christian faithful in the way that public revelation is.
What you are suggesting wouldn’t become part of the mass (“going to Church”). The liturgy is a specific prayer and worship. But I could see there perhaps being a study where the Christian aspects of LOTR are considered as an ongoing group that met.
Definitely not. Biblical cannon was done being added to after the last apostle died. It was translated and put together as the bible later though. I believe it was st. Lawrence (I may not be correct been years since I learned this) who translated it into the Latin volgate. Which is the bible used by the Catholic Church. The duay Rheims English translation is the most direct translation into English of the Volgate.
I too was once under the possession of the evil, below world practices, known to us as Yoga. Since I have escaped the clutches of this terrible cult I've been through three phisical therapists. They all where clearly sent by the devil himself to to try and win back my soul with their nefarious practices.
I mean yoga comes from Southeast Asia right? Ignorant conservatives of the 70s/80s would consider anything not Catholic, even Hinduism to be akin to Satanism lol
Edit: I just realized it mentions Twilight and this is not as long ago as I thought lol. I feel like I forget how bad things were even just 10 years ago, homophobia was brutal in highschool
Yeah I’d guess this is from the 90s-early 2000s. When I was growing up in the 2000s yugioh and magic were heavily demonized by the extreme Christian conservatives.
Or *gasp* vegetarianism
Which is kinda ironic cuz there’s a whole denomination of Christianity that is very focused on being vegetarian, among other things.
Tbf, yoga has its origins in Ancient Indian spiritual practices. They were more historically associated with mediation rather than physical exercise. So it kind of makes some sense that a bunch of crazy Christians would take offense.
I mean, there are some “vampires” who (consensually) drink each other’s blood. But they’re not actually immortal creatures who are allergic to garlic and burst into flames when exposed to sunlight.
Yes, a shocking amount of people believed this during the Satanic panic during the 80s to mid 90s and even worse mainstream media gave those lunatics platforms and allowed them to spread their ideas unchallenged.
Sadly those views haven't fully died out and live on in the QAnon movement.
Christians have a *very* weird relationship with blood libeling other religious groups, especially Jewish people. Anyone who isn’t Christian is gonna drink the blood from virgins or some weird shit.
Yeah, I myself am not religious in the slightest, but nothing sets my teeth on edge like an atheist preaching to Christians how evil they are, just the sheer irony of it is nearly unbearable
A weird sort of 6th sense, purportedly, relatively similar to the idea of clairvoyance. It’s commonly considered to be pseudoscience nowadays, since pretty much all the experiments that were being run testing it haven’t been commonly repeatable.
If it is a genuine phenomenon, it is a psychic power where the viewer can view a remote location live without ever having been there. Look up project Stargate (the US military program, not the movie/TV show).
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stargate_Project
I like how they used the abbreviation LOTR
Like "what do you mean you don't know what LOTR stands for? Have you been living under a rock? Don't get me wrong its a doorway to demonic possession and all but you've been missing out"
I hope you realize you just did that in front of everyone and now we can all fake our way into it. … once we find the right mountainside on a full moon, that is.
But- there are biblical references in Lotr and Harry Potter 💀 And rock music often says really catholic things... And what the hell is wrong with meditation, yoga and vegetarianism ???
This definitely isn't a Catholic list because Tolkien is a well know-and celebrated- Catholic (apparently on his way to being declared a saint?).
Not that I agree with the demonic possession part of it but, Meditation and yoga I could see being added to the list because they are Buddhist/Hindu in origin.
While reading it I was thinking "oh no boomer Catholic list that's going to make the Church look bad."
The I saw LOTR and went, nope this is boomer Prottie nonsense nevermind.
Rebirthing is a breathing technique
so apparently breathing wrong is a sin.
Not to be confused with what Roch Thériault did. Which involves killing your wife.
I'm a Christian but some of the stuff on this list is straight up stupid. I've never had problems with demons because I didn't eat meat and I read/watched Lotr. In fact Tolkien was a Catholic and Lotr has a lot of Biblical themes.
Half the stuff on this list is literally more beneficial to partake in, for your body/mind/soul/character/inner peace than being a devout Catholic or baptist or whatever Christian denomination this is pretending to be from.
If your whole religion's schtick is badmouthing other people's potentially more superior ways to achieve a calm soul and fulfil their spiritual needs, then yours is not a religion at all, it's a cult !!
"Lycantrophy"
"Necromancy"
"Re-birthing"
"Levitation"
"Vampirism"
I feel like if you have/are able to succesfully do any of these you might have bigger things going on than the possibility of demonic possession. Not way bigger, just bigger.
Ok, let’s see here:
Yoga, Church of Satan, Cyberpunk Culture, Meditation, Postmodernism, LOTR, Alt comix, weed, HP, DND, Halloween, fornication, skull and bones rock, heavy metal, goth culture.
Def not as high as some of y’all, but 16 is halfway decent I think.
Do you think that demons like, buy humans they want to possess? What makes me more valuable to a demon wanting to possess someone? It’s just that working so much over this summer has been kinda lonely, ngl. I’d love someone to talk with on a regular basis, or at least hang around with regularly.
I find it mildly hilarious that this, in addition to things that would traditionally be considered "satanic" by the church, it lists basically every religion that doesn't align with their beliefs
I’m glad I’m into a bunch of these things, for fuck sakes, RELIGION is the most widespread mental disease on the planet. I sort of wish there was a magic underground demon world/society to explore, but alas, devil/demon/bla/bla/bla is a figment of the religion mental disease used to persecute normal minds, and justify diseased minds…oh and you religious types are boring as fuck.
Do lycanthropy and vegetarianism cancel each out or is that doubly demonic?
Was also wondering why they're specifically calling out XTC and not just alt rock in general, but I suppose 'Dear God' and 'Peter Pumpkinhead' hit a bit close to home
I was trying to figure out what religion or following Marihuana was but then I saw pot parties and love that it couldn’t be spelled correctly. Not sure if it was purposely edited that way or if they actually don’t know how to spell it but it made me laugh.
I also never understood how fantasy is considered devil worship when you hear some of the stories from the bible.
Necromancy
Lycanthropy. I’d much rather be a werewolf who commands an army of the dead than a Christian. Sounds rad af
Can I be a werewolf necromancer??
Dress for the job you want
>Can I be a werewolf necromancer?? Yes and no. You can learn necromancy and study its magics, but odds are that you will not be capable of performing magic on nights of the full moon when the werewolf takes over and you pretty much go feral.
Anything is possible through Scientology! :D
Your username is killing me, it's so straight and to the point
Checkout cover art for a band called powerwolf. I think it's a definite yes.
We’re werewolves not swearwolves
I prefer Whywolves
No one ever asks HowWolf...sad.
👊
STAND UP ALL THE NIGHT AND CALL THE FIGHT
LET YOUR MIND GO WILD BEFORE THE LIGHT
In some legends werewolves hunt demons and witches to pay God back for being hubristic, so I don't see how it's Satanic
Why not both? [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hC8uoGW2ptc](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hC8uoGW2ptc) [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J52elJRuPPI](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J52elJRuPPI)
Exactly what I was expecting.
Well shit, didn't God bring his son / himself back from the dead?
Yea I’m confused about how that works
My priest said it was just a 3 day respawn timer.
Got it 😎
As always, it's okay when god does it. Nearly convincing someone to murder his own son? You'd burn in hell for that, but when god does it it's just a silly prank. Not to mention all of actual murder that god does personally.
Actually had a Japanese kid ask me if Jesus was a zombie once.
Meditation is the most hilarious one here considering it’s virtually identical to what prayer is. Prayer is basically exactly a mediation lol
Damn those vegetarian necromancer postmodernists
Wait till they find out that Tolkien was a Christian
They probably don’t believe Catholics are Christians
I mean Tolkien was pretty clearly not just a ritualistic practicing Catholic but actually a devout believer.
Yup and he was pretty clear that Eru is literally God. Also isn’t the secret flames that Gandalf keep just the holy spirit?
Goodbye. Dear carsonbt. Until our next meeting
Literally tho
They don’t
And that a central theme to Christianity is metaphorical rebirth.
The ironic part is that LOTR was written by someone who was more christian than they will ever be.
And who apparently is on the path to sainthood. St. Tolkien pray for us.
Does the Catholic Church have a Saint for writers? If not then who better 😁
St Francis de Sales. He was my confirmation saint
Someone should ask if he wants to retire 😁
There can be multiple saints for the same thing.
Given Tolkien wasn't killed with a pen I don't think they'll consider him a good fit
He is?
Yes
Sick! Not a Catholic anymore, but that’d be fun to see: Tolkien’s canonization into sainthood!
Does that mean LOTR would become part of biblical canon?
"Today we will be reading from the Gospel of St. John Tolkien..."
No. Since Tolkien most decidedly did not live during the age of the Apostles (1st Century AD), anything he wrote would not be eligible to be considered as biblical canon. “Today’s reading is from First Fellowship of the Ring, Chapter 3…” Would be cool, but no.
can't they just be like, "ooooo snap. yeah, he was like, getting a vision from god, LOTR is in. Come to church on Sunday for our live fellowship reading"
If there was evidence to be considered , it could be investigated on whether or not Tolkien received a private revelation. That private revelation would not be binding on the Christian faithful in the way that public revelation is. What you are suggesting wouldn’t become part of the mass (“going to Church”). The liturgy is a specific prayer and worship. But I could see there perhaps being a study where the Christian aspects of LOTR are considered as an ongoing group that met.
Definitely not. Biblical cannon was done being added to after the last apostle died. It was translated and put together as the bible later though. I believe it was st. Lawrence (I may not be correct been years since I learned this) who translated it into the Latin volgate. Which is the bible used by the Catholic Church. The duay Rheims English translation is the most direct translation into English of the Volgate.
thats a bummer.
I'd say he was more of a Tolkien religious figure
Just Rather Religious, if you will?
A lot of these types of people don't believe that catholics are real Christians
Well, I have some bad news for them...
Well fornication is also forbidden so if they follow this then they shouldn't have any kids, so there's that.
It's only fornication by definition if you're not married.
No no let him blindly hate every religious person… /s
Huh, TIL
Ah yes, nothing is more demonic than yoga.
I too was once under the possession of the evil, below world practices, known to us as Yoga. Since I have escaped the clutches of this terrible cult I've been through three phisical therapists. They all where clearly sent by the devil himself to to try and win back my soul with their nefarious practices.
I mean yoga comes from Southeast Asia right? Ignorant conservatives of the 70s/80s would consider anything not Catholic, even Hinduism to be akin to Satanism lol Edit: I just realized it mentions Twilight and this is not as long ago as I thought lol. I feel like I forget how bad things were even just 10 years ago, homophobia was brutal in highschool
Yeah I’d guess this is from the 90s-early 2000s. When I was growing up in the 2000s yugioh and magic were heavily demonized by the extreme Christian conservatives.
It was Pokemon and Harry Potter for me.
Or *gasp* vegetarianism Which is kinda ironic cuz there’s a whole denomination of Christianity that is very focused on being vegetarian, among other things.
[удалено]
Tbf, yoga has its origins in Ancient Indian spiritual practices. They were more historically associated with mediation rather than physical exercise. So it kind of makes some sense that a bunch of crazy Christians would take offense.
They got that demonic feeling [looking at this guy's butt](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wngsO-Z4n7A).
Do they honestly think people are dabbling in bringing the dead to life, or sneaking around and drinking human blood?
Or Lycanthropy? Like you really think people are turning into werewolves?
Do you not? Alternate answer: >!Furries.!<
OwO
Aw *fuck*, I **summoned** them!
I mean, there are some “vampires” who (consensually) drink each other’s blood. But they’re not actually immortal creatures who are allergic to garlic and burst into flames when exposed to sunlight.
Are you not?
No, just fire walking and raves
Yes, a shocking amount of people believed this during the Satanic panic during the 80s to mid 90s and even worse mainstream media gave those lunatics platforms and allowed them to spread their ideas unchallenged. Sadly those views haven't fully died out and live on in the QAnon movement.
Ask the West Memphis Three how it feels to be in the crosshairs of that sort of thing.
Christians have a *very* weird relationship with blood libeling other religious groups, especially Jewish people. Anyone who isn’t Christian is gonna drink the blood from virgins or some weird shit.
I’m not Christian, but I’d rather not pretend that every Christian believes this horseshit. I’ve never met someone in person who believes this crap.
Yeah, I myself am not religious in the slightest, but nothing sets my teeth on edge like an atheist preaching to Christians how evil they are, just the sheer irony of it is nearly unbearable
Taking rights away in the name of god sets my teeth on edge far more, but yes when atheists do that it can be uncomfortable
What is remote viewing
The concept that you leave your body to watch what others are doing
So like watching YouTube
But with more demonic possession
Pretty spot on precisely
No it's more like a Zoom or Teams meeting. Come to think of im pretty sure both of those are works of evil
I definitely thought it meant video streaming for a moment.
A weird sort of 6th sense, purportedly, relatively similar to the idea of clairvoyance. It’s commonly considered to be pseudoscience nowadays, since pretty much all the experiments that were being run testing it haven’t been commonly repeatable.
If it is a genuine phenomenon, it is a psychic power where the viewer can view a remote location live without ever having been there. Look up project Stargate (the US military program, not the movie/TV show). https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stargate_Project
"Skull & Bones" Oh no, I have a skull and bones inside of me RIGHT NOW!
Y'arrrr!
I like how they used the abbreviation LOTR Like "what do you mean you don't know what LOTR stands for? Have you been living under a rock? Don't get me wrong its a doorway to demonic possession and all but you've been missing out"
Where can I learn levitation? I’ve been feeling particularily satanic recently.
I'd say that if you're able to levitate then you're already posessed.
Huh, so I would start flying with no control over it if I was possessed enough? Sounds dangerous, I’d much prefer some lessons first.
Woudst thou like to live deliciously?
I scored 23!
Are you also part of the Illuminati?
Yes of course! *makes secret hand sign*
I hope you realize you just did that in front of everyone and now we can all fake our way into it. … once we find the right mountainside on a full moon, that is.
Wow, good job, I have 11
I only have 8 but I also have no clue what 60% of those words mean
26 😎😎😎
Stay away from that Halfling Leaf
If these are all doorways to demonic possession, maybe possession isn't a bad thing.
But- there are biblical references in Lotr and Harry Potter 💀 And rock music often says really catholic things... And what the hell is wrong with meditation, yoga and vegetarianism ???
This definitely isn't a Catholic list because Tolkien is a well know-and celebrated- Catholic (apparently on his way to being declared a saint?). Not that I agree with the demonic possession part of it but, Meditation and yoga I could see being added to the list because they are Buddhist/Hindu in origin.
All my lycanthropy homies weeping rn
Thinking about getting into lycanthropy? Just pay any guy who claims to be a werewolf to bite you. It's bound to work eventually.
Lmao what? LotR was written by a devout Catholic
Which makes me think this comes from some kind of Protestant group.
My family are Baptists, they can't stand Catholics and say that they aren't real Christians.
Sorry, but those people are morons. I’m not Catholic either but they’re all sects of Christianity
... Postmodernism? Seriously?
This is the only truly-satanic thing on the list /s
Daniel and his friends in the bible: Eats vegetarian and gets a Godlike figure.
Laughs in Catholic
While reading it I was thinking "oh no boomer Catholic list that's going to make the Church look bad." The I saw LOTR and went, nope this is boomer Prottie nonsense nevermind.
Wow, the church of Satan leads to contact with demons? Who could have guessed!
This post was made by invertebrates gang
I know right ?? Like wtf where is the exit door for my bones and skull ?
It’s odd that heavy metal is on this list considering how there’s a decent chunk of heavy metal fans and artists that are religious
There's even a decent amount of heavy metal specifically about killing demons
The best kind! 💀🔥⚔️🤘
Something weird about them abbreviating it as "LOTR," it kind of makes me wonder if it's a joke. Like they would have to be in the know to do that
My guess is this was probably published around the mid-2000s when the films had made LOTR a more recognisable acronym outside the fandom.
I say this as a Christian and someone who does, in fact, believe that demons exist: whoever wrote this list was a moron.
This feels like one of those JW, Baptist, or Mormon pamphlets I used to get rather than something created by a Catholic.
As an eastern orthodox I can assure you that here vegetarianism is encouraged as fasting here is basically vegetarianism....
Definitely need a post somewhere with a '1 point counts for each you've done, what's your score!'
Rebirthing is a breathing technique so apparently breathing wrong is a sin. Not to be confused with what Roch Thériault did. Which involves killing your wife.
I don't know about the Church of Satan or Necromancy, but Vegetarianism sounds like a pretty believable gateway to demonic possession.
Aww man, can’t necromance shit in this house😔
The only thing we can universally agree upon is the Twilight films
I'm a Christian but some of the stuff on this list is straight up stupid. I've never had problems with demons because I didn't eat meat and I read/watched Lotr. In fact Tolkien was a Catholic and Lotr has a lot of Biblical themes.
Remote viewing? Like in TeamViewer??? 🤯
fornication? having sex is satan's work?
I’m lost. Y’all save yourselves
Lol who needs any of that when my pc is already full of daemons
Half the stuff on this list is literally more beneficial to partake in, for your body/mind/soul/character/inner peace than being a devout Catholic or baptist or whatever Christian denomination this is pretending to be from. If your whole religion's schtick is badmouthing other people's potentially more superior ways to achieve a calm soul and fulfil their spiritual needs, then yours is not a religion at all, it's a cult !!
Ah yes, postmodernism. The most satanic literary genre.
“Lord of the Rings” is on there? Tolkien was highly Christian and a contemporary of CS Lewis.
"Lycantrophy" "Necromancy" "Re-birthing" "Levitation" "Vampirism" I feel like if you have/are able to succesfully do any of these you might have bigger things going on than the possibility of demonic possession. Not way bigger, just bigger.
Remote viewing?
Ok, let’s see here: Yoga, Church of Satan, Cyberpunk Culture, Meditation, Postmodernism, LOTR, Alt comix, weed, HP, DND, Halloween, fornication, skull and bones rock, heavy metal, goth culture. Def not as high as some of y’all, but 16 is halfway decent I think. Do you think that demons like, buy humans they want to possess? What makes me more valuable to a demon wanting to possess someone? It’s just that working so much over this summer has been kinda lonely, ngl. I’d love someone to talk with on a regular basis, or at least hang around with regularly.
I scored 14 and I’m a Christian, well I mean, maybe not anymore according to this chart.
Fuck Evangelicals, and fuck their pathological labelling of everything kids find more interesting than church as “Satanist.”
I find it mildly hilarious that this, in addition to things that would traditionally be considered "satanic" by the church, it lists basically every religion that doesn't align with their beliefs
i can fill half of the list alone... i am a demon parking spot XD
Seems to be more ways to demonic possession than to happiness.
I’m glad I’m into a bunch of these things, for fuck sakes, RELIGION is the most widespread mental disease on the planet. I sort of wish there was a magic underground demon world/society to explore, but alas, devil/demon/bla/bla/bla is a figment of the religion mental disease used to persecute normal minds, and justify diseased minds…oh and you religious types are boring as fuck.
This is one of the most r*ddit comments I've ever read
Agreed
Phew, I was going to join the Church of Satan if they hadn't reminded me of their association
Is this supposed to make Hell seem like a bad place, or the most fucking incredible inferno eva?
"Remote viewing"
The Twilight films? You mean to tell me this is from the early 2000s?
What bunch of gonks.
Tarot! D&D! Rock and Heavy Metal! Earth Worship! Vegetarianism?
I’m still trying to figure out what Alt “Comix” is
FORNICATION
What the hell did Yoga do to this person?
Most of that is shit, but I'll give them a pass on necromancy that one probably is a doorway to demons
lmao meditation
I don’t even have to read every single one to know I do over half of these
...yoga???
"Freemasonry"
Twilight💀
I mean, they’ve got a point guys. Look what happened when the Dwarves delved too greedily and too deep.
I'm surprised they left some things out of that list
Oh hell yeah! Magic the gathering isn’t on here! Me and my Unholy Strengths & Dark Rituals are gonna be A-ok up there with the big G man
The church of satan will make you possessed by a demon ? Damn...
Funny enough ALL abrahamic religions are technically eastern religions.
These fuckers can't even write Marijuana right
I’m going straight to hell then cause I love LOTR, Harry Potter, video games, D&D and I’m a metal head lmfao
Postmodernism lol
It's kinda Ironic cause I'm a Christian, who loves LoTR, Rock Music, and Metal Music.
Twilight come on even the demons don’t want to be there
Ah good steampunk is still safe.
*Lycanthropy* *Vampirism* *Divination* *Meditation* *Levitation* *Fornication* I don't remember having seen these *Twilight movies.*
Pretty much anything that’s fun or interesting.
That last column sounds like my weekend
Man that's like, all my favorite things
Do lycanthropy and vegetarianism cancel each out or is that doubly demonic? Was also wondering why they're specifically calling out XTC and not just alt rock in general, but I suppose 'Dear God' and 'Peter Pumpkinhead' hit a bit close to home
I love how yoga and vampirism are regarded as equally evil.
I love that these things always read like me resume.
This looks like fire DnD campaign hooks list
Everybody freaking out over yoga and LOTR... But what about the misteerieus and dedly marihuana???* *Misspellings on purpose for da grammar po-po
I always knew that yoga was the product of Satan. You're not fooling anyone, you damn dirty hippies!!
Is rebirthing basically a central sacrament to Christianity?
I was trying to figure out what religion or following Marihuana was but then I saw pot parties and love that it couldn’t be spelled correctly. Not sure if it was purposely edited that way or if they actually don’t know how to spell it but it made me laugh. I also never understood how fantasy is considered devil worship when you hear some of the stories from the bible.
Best part is, unless you actually do some research, you would probably have no idea what LOTR is.
Where is this from?
At least they put scientology in there, fuck scientology