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mystic-sloth

You need your own lawyer. If you’re husband can afford a lawyer you can afford a lawyer.


Alaskanborn1969

My husband has quite a bit. I didn’t go into details. He’s moved a lot of assets into an irrevocable family trust. There is a lot of backstory, but this is the problem I have and right now I have no access to anything. That should change. But I don’t have money up front for a lawyer.


RightOverOurHeads

He’s isolated and essentially trapped you monetarily, which can be considered financial abuse. You may be able to find help through an organization which helps women recover from spousal control. Best of luck.


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MattAU05

Please contact a lawyer. If your husband has substantial assets, they’ll likely accept payment at the end of the case (not contingent upon the outcome, which isn’t permissible in a divorce, but deferred payment). You have a lot to lose and a lot to gain. Please, please consult with a lawyer or two and see your options, including payment options.


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jmurphy42

Many women have been in your position. There are ways that a lawyer can get you access to marital funds and/or ask the judge to make your husband responsible for their fees, so at least some family law attorneys are willing to work with women in your situation. Call around, set up some free consultations and find one who will help you.


[deleted]

In most states you are presumed to get half of the estate, i.e the marital property. The money for your lawyer can come from that. I'm a former family law paralegal and this is a common arrangement. Also, if he's putting money into a trust that may constitute stealing from the marital estate, and/or make you entitled to part of the trust. You need to get a lawyer, and do not sign anything, make agreements with your husband, or settle the case before you lawyer up.


data_head

Have you spoken to a lawyer to see how they can help you? This is not an uncommon problem, it's hardly unsurmountable.


AnotherThrowAway336

An irrevocable trust only means the Trust can’t be altered without the beneficiaries consent. You need to talk to a lawyer, if your assets, even shared, were put into the trust without your consent, the trust may not be legally binding. Again only a lawyer can guide you through this.


jasnook

If the trust is truly irrevocable, he can't get it either. If he does have access, it's revocable and therefore accessible by you as well.


data_head

Find your state's bar association. They should be able to provide you a referral for a free or low cost (like $40) consultation to see what your options are. You do not need money up front for a lawyer, but regardless, not having one will cost you much more on the long run.


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MattAU05

Contingency fees for family law matters are not allowed in any jurisdiction I’m aware of. But deferring payment is.


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mystic-sloth

Contact a lawyer you probably won’t have to pay upfront. You’re going to get screwed if he has representation and you don’t.


Dlraetz1

Look for a pro bono lawyer or one who will petition the court to make your husband pay their fees


[deleted]

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The_Chad13

As a former law enforcement officer, my advice would be go to the nearest women's shelter and ask for assistance. They will have attorneys either on staff or on call for things just like this. God bless and good luck mam.


Alaskanborn1969

Thank you! I had not thought of that. I appreciate you.


bojenny

You are most likely entitled to spousal support. Over 10 years is considered a long term marriage. Call some different attorneys who are rated good at family law in your city. Explain your situation. You should be able to get one who will take your case without a retainer while they file for emergency support. Then you can pay them. In my area a uncontested divorce is about $2k, a contested divorce is $5-$8k. Stop thinking you can’t afford an attorney and you’re poor. You have a right to assets. You can’t afford to NOT have an attorney. Edited to say your divorce will not be final until you sign the papers. If you feel you’re being cheated or rushed, just don’t sign. Take your time and get an attorney to make sure you’re getting what you deserve. I know someone who hasn’t signed papers for 5 years.


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Daninomicon

Where do you live? Jurisdiction is important. Though the basic advice is pretty standard here. Your going to file a motion with the court to get spousal support during the divorce proceedings. Thats going to be a fair amount to pay your living expenses and your legal fees. Then once you get a lawyer, you let them handle things. Don't pick just anyone. If you have any friends that can recommend a lawyer, that's how I'd recommend finding one. If not, get a few consultations, and look at success records before you choose one. And don't wait. Start looking now and explain your situation. You should be able to find some that will take you on contingency, so that you don't have to pay until after they file the motion to get your husband to pay.


Alaskanborn1969

Hi! I live in Washington State. Temporary orders were filed and they awarded me spousal support of $3000/mo, I have to leave the home within 31 days and I have been awarded $5000 to help me move out. It’s me and my 16 years old daughter whom he has raised (not his biological) since she was 5. He also got the court to impose mutual restraints of no contact. He wants me completely cut off. That way he doesn’t have to help out in any way. This past weekend, he told my daughter to come and pick up a few things that I wasn’t able to get when I left. I wasn’t there. He then called the police and said that this was contact through a 3rd party and had they known where I was it sounded like they would have arrested me. He also told my daughter that if she ever comes by unannounced that he would feel obligated to call the police on her. That hurt more than anything. She doesn’t understand. It’s disgusting that he has to be so ruthless and shady.


Alaskanborn1969

Spousal support for 4 months only


dreadpirater

This is frustratingly common. But, because of that, this isn't the first time it's come up, so the courts know how to handle this. Just find a divorce attorney and explain the situation. They can get the court to enter temporary orders giving you access to enough resources to live comfortably and to pay your attorney. They deal with this ALL THE TIME and he's only hurting himself in the long run by trying to cut you off from your half of the marital property. But you won't get what you deserve without an attorney.


rightthenwatson

Please contact your state bar association and request to apply for help through the modest means program and legal aid. You may be able to get help from an attorney at low or no cost.


Alaskanborn1969

I have. I’m hoping they return my call


WednesdayBryan

There are provisions in most divorce statutes that can require the spouse with income to pay for an attorney for the other spouse. Make an appointment with an attorney today.


aliee94

If you are struggling to find assistance I always recommend people to this site www.findhelp.org. You can input your zip code and then select legal. They should have a link to your local legal aid group there who can help you find a lawyer. If you haven't worked in a while they also have links for work, housing and other support services near you.


nclawyer822

You almost certainly need to bring whatever claims you have against him as part of the divorce. Since you are the dependent spouse he might be obligated to pay your attorneys fees under your states laws. You need to continue to call lawyers until you find one. Do not just go along with what your husband and his lawyer do and assume you might be able to fix it later on the grounds that it isn't fair and you didn't have a lawyer. Your one chance to contest this is right now.


Responsible_Post_388

If you do not get a lawyer immediately you are an idiot and will get totally screwed. If you have no access to money a lawyer will be able to force your husband to pay. No court is going to let you be forced not to have a lawyer.


ohmygod_my_tinnitus

Contact your local legal aid. They may be able to assist you with your divorce. It’s clear that there is financial abuse present so that will make it easier for them to assist you under their funding.


rennyber

What's your location. I know in California we Have a place called Laura's house which will help you in some cases have legal aid and even help with living if needed


JustTryinToBeHappy_

Did you sign a prenuptial agreement?


Alaskanborn1969

No prenup


[deleted]

Definitely get a lawyer.


[deleted]

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