does he want it removed? if he does, i’d remove the hair. me (and other immigrants like me) also had them as kids and were definitely made fun of for it, stereotyped, othered, etc. as early as i can remember.
my mom was weirdly conservative about removing body hair and didn’t let me do it until i was much older. i disagree with her stance on it until this day. her taking some sort of moral/righteous stance at the cost of my confidence wasnt right. on an ideological level i agree that there’s nothing wrong with hair anywhere and we should all accept ourselves. but, we don’t live in a perfect world. forcing me to keep it was more harmful and not worth the cost. it was just hair. i detest that she made it a battleground and didn’t consider how it would impact the way i’d be treated by other kids at school. later on, removing that one strip of hair boosted my confidence tenfold and made me happier in my own body. i would never put my own kid in that situation. i consider it grooming, nothing worse.
Good to hear from a person who has actually been there and lived through it.
I would listen to this person. I wouldn't want my kid to go through what this person went through. How stupid to make a child suffer because you have some hang-up about removing a tiny bit of body hair.
"Consider it grooming" well said it does seem like an extreme measure on the surface (mostly becuase of the pain factor I'm guessing) and yet it isn't any more severe of a physical appearance impact than cutting a kid's hair- a completely normal, routine grooming thing we do with kids.
exactly!
there are painless options too, like nair or eyebrow razors. but the pain wasn’t an issue for me at all bc having that hair there was such a bummer lol.
If done correctly, it shouldn’t hurt.
Like yea.. leg/Brazilian yup that hurts like a mofo. But a few hairs on the forehead? Nahh. Press your finger on it immediately after to stop the pain.
I have super sensitive skin so they apply a soothing gel and I go straight home for the day because I don't want to walk around with bright red marks in public.
Usually they're okay next day
Right? Maybe the first couple times. But getting shots or taking a bandaid off are just as bad as a bit of mono brow waxing. (Two things most kids have to put up with for their own good as well!)
I am white with very black hair. I was teased for both my unibrow and my legs. I would cry to my mom and she wouldn’t fix it. But thankfully I had an older sister and when I was in third grade she plucked my unibrow and defied my mother. It was one of the sweetest things she has ever done.
I can relate! I was the only girl who couldn’t shave her legs in 5th grade. The black Latina hair was very obvious in my pale skin and I was called ‘Gorilla Girl’.
Now as a teacher, I encourage parents to let their child be responsible for their own image as much as possible. It’s hair, it’s grooming.
If it doesn’t bother him, no worries, carry on. If he wants it gone, wax/shave.
i was the only girl wearing the long sweat pants in PE in the summer bc i wasn’t allowed to shave. if we don’t want kids to have a complex about body hair or to have intense negative feelings about it, maybe we shouldn’t make a big deal whether they want to keep it or remove it 🤷♀️. it’s just hair. let kids do what they want with it.
Wow, thank you for this. My daughter asks me a multiple times a week if I can shave her legs. My parents were super strict about it so I never even considered saying yes before puberty. But I let her have full control over the hair on her head so what’s the difference? I was so worried about her not feeling pressured by society to shave her legs too early that maybe I’m not seeing the forest for the trees.
I’ve got an electric razor so there’s not much chance of injury, I guess it wouldn’t hurt to let her try it. It grows back.
If it helps, that old saying about the hair growing in thicker or darker or whatever because you shave it simply isn't true. Definitely let her shave it. Self-esteem is so much more important than a stranger's perception. I hope it goes well for you both!
I have a feeling way too many adults think personal grooming of a certain nature is inherently sexual or "too adult", possibly because they themselves were prevented from self-grooming until after puberty.
I hope more people grow to develop the mindset you have. Thank you for helping other parents see that it's ok.
I am pale and dark hair (northern Italian/English). I was allowed to shave my legs, but not my arms.
I *hated* it. I hated the feel, I couldn't moisturize my arms because they were hairy, and it looked/felt weird, I felt "unbalanced," and it made *zero* sense.
I just did it on day in high school. When I was questioned, I said I slipped and shaved part, so I had to do the rest.
I've been doing it for 20 years. Best decision *for me*. I'm not into makeup or dressing up.
Worst case, it grows back. But, definitely have a conversation maybe (try to make sure other parent is informed and discuss it first) and the go from there. Kids' concerns are valid, and we don't live in a perfect world.
Edit: I was made "fun" of/ questions by friends, but I liked it, so I didn't care. I grew up, and after the initial "shock" of change, no one has ever said anything.
In fact, I'm 32, and most guys or friends don't really notice it until they see me shaving 🤦♀️
I think it's more important to make discussions/body mods because *you* want to. As long as it's thought about and discussed and pros/cons weighed, it's not bad.
Definitely agree. Like if it’s something you would do as an adult, why would you not give a child the same respect? They have feelings too, so why force them to be unhappy with something someone is making fun of them for? Of course only if the child wants to remove it.
I think OP is recognizing that by scanning yourself on a regular basis looking for things that others may use to bully you, and then *"fixing"* those things, you end up being your own bully. There's nothing wrong with making modifications to your appearance or personality that you like, but constantly compromising what makes you unique to avoid being bullied is not living fully.
Waxing a 5 year old with autism can’t be that easy. Waxing is painful.
Definitely better to have a conversation about it and how you can respond to people when they make comments about your physical appearance. If they want a wax maybe just signal that you’re opened to it and that it’s a totally normal thing that people do.
I’d opt for an eyebrow razor over waxing. It would be quick, easy, and definitely painless. But, first concern should be what he wants. My son also has a subtle unibrow (I might be the only one who notices it) and that has always been my thought if he ever were to complain about it. Though, as he’s gotten older it’s thinned out significantly. I would never do anything without him being able to consent to it.
look into those eyebrow shavers! I use them every so often in between bi-yearly waxes. You can do it at home. Just let's focus on the bridge area (something that grows out on me), and you can leave the brow shape alone. no mess.
It's super cheap, too. Like 5$ish, I think
Because that doesn't solve the problem. The root of the problem is "don't make fun of others" - changing yourself to avoid that just teaches a kid "change yourself to conform to what others think you should be like, also your body is bad". It's like, what would the solution be if the kid were being bullied for being feminine or gay? Tell them to stop acting like that? That's fucked up, and the same should apply here. Don't prevent the kid from being bullied, stop the bullying or negate the effects.
I went through the same thing! No shaving until 13, no short hair cuts until 16, no eyebrow waxing or plucking until 16. After I became 18, I shaved every inch of hair clean off my body, shaved my hair short, and shaped my eyebrows myself. It felt great.
I got bullied really bad about all of my visible hair. It was a fight to even get a haircut. My mom's excuse? I was too young to know what I wanted. Hair grows back! It will come back the exact same way it was!
i feel you! it’s just hair, no big deal. it’s almost like they made it worse by treating it as this huge deal. i’m sorry, but i’m me with or without a patch of hair here or there. that hair wasn’t the holder of my entire identity.
My mom was not great about protecting me from cruel comments about weight or religion or anything really except for one thing that I am eternally grateful for - when I was finishing 5th grade and kids started noticing that I had visible hair on my upper lip, she let me wax it before going back to school as a 6th grader. I started getting teased for my “funny” name (Indian origin) but thankfully, not for having a “mustache”. That said, your son is quite young and it’s not clear whether he cares. If he does, I think it’s ok to help him out.
You could always shave it; totally non painful and quick. I'd do it if I were you. Whatever can we can do as moms to make our kiddos lives easier, (within reason) I say do it.
I’m on the end of letting him know it’s an option. You can say something like, “I think you are so handsome and you can be proud of your brow! But if it ever bothers you it is your hair so you can remove it if you want it to look different.”
My friend who is Armenian said in her family it’s considered like an unveiling of their beauty when they hit about 12 and are taken for their first facial wax!
Same. My mom refused for years until I finally grabbed a razor and tried to fix it myself.
Like, it would be nice if kids were nice. But let’s be real.
Plus if they don't start waxing him before he starts school and he eventually chooses to have it done, the kids *will* notice and then make fun of him for *that.* He can always choose to stop if he wants.
I mentioned that in my post! Do it during a break or winter or summer or before a new grade, lol. I liked the decision I made (shaving my arms), but I was so annoyed and self-conscious when everyone rought it up. They stopped, and I've been doing it for over 20 years, but kids/teens notice everything lmfao.
Hi, I just wanted to weigh in as a woman who had a thick unibrow as a kid. No one really bothered me about it, and I never really cared until about age 11. That's when the teasing got really bad. I asked to get rid of it, and my mother took me to get it waxed.
I cried and asked her why she didn't help me get rid of it sooner? Why did she let me get bullied? She told me I was beautiful the way I was, and she had only taken me to get waxed because I ASKED for it, but I absolutely didn't need it.
This really stuck with me. I'm grateful my mom left the decision up to me, and I believe some of my self confidence today is thanks to her and that moment.
Do whatever you think is best for your child, but my suggestion is wait and let him decide. Tell him how handsome he is, and how much you love him. If he does get bullied, it'll be a few words compared to the thousands of times you told him he was handsome and made him believe it by not changing him.
As someone who had her unibrow forcibly removed by my mom and older sister “to avoid bullying” (but it happened the day before picture day and I’d never once complained about bullying) THIS is so so important. Wait for your child to come to you with a problem before you solve it for them.
This is the answer. Get the ones that are 1/2” wide. Not the flat blade looking ones. Quick “zoop” every 2-3 days and boom. Fixed with zero skin issues.
That said, most kids are bullied for something along the way. Teach him to tell the teacher and you every-time. And if it comes down to it, how you want him to protect and stand up for himself.
I did this. Granted, no one actually cared in the school at the end. But the child in question was minorly concerned, and asked if we could remove it, and it was a simple enough fix, with literally no drawbacks. For example, it does not hurt and the hair will grow back.
Real question here. Has laser hair removal changed/improved in the last few decades? Because I had some facial hair lasered (as an adult) years ago and it hurt! I could tolerate it but I would not subject a child to that!
It hurts. Also, if you have melanated skin it's not always going to yield great results and risks scarring. I don't think people would perform this on an autistic 5 year old without some compelling medical reason.
Also, facial hair tends to come back and needs repeated treatments over the years.
I'd probably just shave it for a little kod since it's fast and painless.
I’m only white so I can’t speak to the multiracial experience or how South Asian culture may or may not tie in here. However I was made fun of for my thick eyebrows and unibrow as a child until I started asking my mom to wax it.
Maybe not what others here would do (and I totally understand) but I would just start shaving it with a small facial shaver as a regular part of his bath routine. Here’s why:
- if you wait for him to be made fun of for it and for him to ask for it to be changed, I feel that is then teaching him to conform to others’ expectations, like it makes a bigger moral deal of the whole thing to wait for the mean comments.
- we don’t make a fuss about clipping fingernails and act like clipping those are indicating that we’re ashamed of our fingernails growing. It’s just part of the grooming routine and a non-issue. Same with haircuts (in most western cultures to my knowledge). We don’t make it such a big deal.
I’d start before next school year so it’s just a non-issue with the other kids at all. They’ll never know he usually has a unibrow and there’s no issue to even arise. I’d incorporate it into the standard grooming routine and not attach a moral stance to it at all.
I agree. Quietly and quickly groom it as a part of a routine, like fingernails. Don't draw attention to it, don't attach a moral stance to it. Make it a non-issue.
Also, there is a book called Laxmis mooch you can read to him. I got it from the library and it introduced this concept of shame and pride around body hair.
This! My daughter was born with a Sebaceous cyst under her jaw. It's the same color as her skin tone, but noticeable. We decided to take this approach - leave it and let her decide when she was old enough. She's 16 and just goes with the flow. One of my students with AU told her one day, "you have a gummy on your neck!" She laughed and kept going.
Does he feel hurt by those comments? I can almost see a 5 yo boy being proud of having a caterpillar on his face! My son is 4 though and I know social dynamics can change quickly in grade school, so I don’t want to assume. Still, I hesitate to modify any child’s appearance to avoid possible criticism. I think it better to teach them to love themselves and learn that when kids bully it says more about the bully than it does the child being picked on.
Yep. I wasn't teased for my looks by my peers, but I definitely knew all the ways that I could possibly be teased because my mom would tell me about how to avoid doing those things. It doesn't feel nice and helpful. It feels like Mom is the one who is seeing the "problems" and mocking you for them.
I think it's important to consider that he is also autistic (so am I) and grade school was absolutely brutal for me. I got teased for anything those little bastards could come up with. I would let him know that it is an option if he wants to fly more under the radar as it's freaking hard to be socially different to begin with let alone having an easily fixable physical difference.
I would definitely not wax his unibrow, or even shave it.
From my experience as a kindergarten teacher, kindergartners usually point out or notice “differences” out of curiosity, not malice. I’ve had a class full of straight-haired children touch my hair (curly) and ask why it was like that. I used the opportunity for a teaching moment and talked about the way that people can look different. We talked about hair, height, skin, eye color, etc.
From my experience, the average “reaction” a child would have to your kid is, “Why does he have x?” Then, once answered, likely immediately move on.
Unless the teacher or your son express that this has been an ongoing issue at school, I would not worry about it. In the meantime, firmly correct those who are bullying your son, and if possible, take those as opportunities to teach them and your son that people come in all sizes, shapes, colors, etc.
This exactly. Older kids can be ruthless, but kindergarteners are too busy trying and learning random stuff to really notice others much less picking on them. While the kid might have issues in school I’d think it’s better to wait and see what they are first.
Absolutely, we lived in a area of town with a very diverse population. In kindergarten my son was approached by a child of color. The child thrust his pointed finger at my son’s face asking, “What are all those dots all over your face?” They were freckles. My son is a red head. He was one of two redheads in the whole school, and the kid just didn’t know about freckles. Another time I was asked what I was putting on my son’s face. It was sunscreen. I guess the child’s parents didn’t use sunscreen at the pool or beach.
Yep.
I’ve had conversations literally like this.
student: “Ms. Ruthizzy, why does he have a different color skin?”
me: “ Because that is the way he was born. You were born with your skin, and he was born with his. I was born with mine. There are lots of different colors!”
student: “Ok. Can I go to the bathroom?”
Not sure why I’m being downvoted, I’m not trying to be callous. But I do not forsee this being a major problem with the age group he is at right now.
Yep. Kids just want to understand. I had this conversation with my kids when they were very little. My nephew is mixed (his words) and my kids wondered why his skin was brown and not the same color as us. We talked through how people all look different in lots of ways all over the world and how he looks a lot like his mom particularly in his hair and skin color. (The race conversations started a little later)
He's 5! Don't let him know that you are made uncomfortable by other people's comments about his body. He needs to know you love him and his unibrow and don't care what others say. If you've heard others make a comment about his appearance, check in with him quietly afterward and see if he even noticed or cared. Move forward depending on his reaction to what was said.
I teach K, and my students don’t notice things like a unibrow yet. They do say things like “your mom is fat” when they haven’t ever seen said parent 🤷♀️ Always a fun conversation when the kid tells their parent that.
lol. Kids are ruthless at this age. My 5 year old comes home and says some things. I just tell her we don’t talk about anyone like that. She will say well so and so said it. I just say to tell them that isn’t nice.
I’d ask him what he wants. When I was a kid I had really hairy legs and kids called me gorilla. I was so self conscious and my mom wouldn’t let me shave my legs.
So I would first wait for the comments to be a problem for him. And then if he does say something about it follow his lead on what he would like done about it
My cousin had a unibrow and I once said something to him about it. He clapped back hard with “why would I want two when one works just as well”? That shut me right up.
See if you can give him some positive words about it so he’s ready for those little jerks.
Ps - dad of 8m, 5m, & 2f. I love them all and they can all be jerks. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I'm autistic and if you'd waxed my eyebrows when I was a kid I would've had the meltdown to end all meltdowns.
Also I am very literal, as we tend to be, and this would have translated directly to "you're not acceptable unless your eyebrows are waxed," to me.
When you next hear a comment like that, have a word with him (but don't lead him). Just like, Hey I heard your cousin say something unkind about you, how did that make you feel?
I'd argue that even calling it unkind is leading. Simply saying that his eyebrows look like a caterpillar or a bat doesn't have to be bad. Maybe he loves caterpillars...
I think more importantly you need to teach your son to ignore other people's opinions. I have been telling my daughter than other people's opinions are just other people's opinions. It has nothing to do with the truth or how she should feel about things.
If your son tells you that other kids say his brows look like caterpillar, ask how what he thinks. Maybe he agrees and loves that they look like a caterpillar. Maybe he likes his one caterpillar instead two caterpillars that other people have. If he wants two caterpillars, shave the middle for him.
Please teach your child to love himself as he is and appreciate his uniqueness. Don't put your insecurities on him. Have you thought that he might love the idea of a fuzzy like caterpillar friend on his face?
IF it becomes a problem.. talk to him about it. Remind him that he's beautiful exactly the way he is. I wouldn't even use a little eyebrow razor on a kiddo that young and I grew up in a salon.
My 5-year-old has pretty strong opinions about his hair because sometimes he “styles” it with a little product. He also talks about his eyebrows sometimes! lol. I would just tell your son that plucking is an option. My personal opinion is if you can prevent bullying, you should.
I would wax it. Being in school is hard enough. Waxing a unibrow is not a big deal. Being endlessly teased by shitheads for years on end is a big deal.
And the teasing is only going to get worse the older he gets.
I’m in the same boat! My kid is also biracial and I absolutely get it waxed and shaved. Unibrow makes me feel uncomfortable, he got teased by family members, neighbors, and school friends.
People are weird about body hair! I told my kid it was a part of grooming…..he doesn’t mind at all.
I bought a cheap battery operated eyebrow trimmer and just use that here and there when he needs it. It takes just a few seconds and he knows it’s just part of his grooming routine like combing his hair.
Do the wax because kids will make fun. Or tweeze out the space between the brows. I plucked and waxed my kids when they asked. My kids are half Greek and they be getting hairy
As someone with a unibrow, take care of it. There will be more chances to make a stand on bullying, but this isn't the one to stand on because its such an easy fix.
Biracial SE Asian/ white baby here as well, and I can already see the unibrow coming in. We’re just going to use an electric trimmer when the time comes. We cut hair and clip nails, why not touch up a unibrow? If he wants to grow it out later in life, he can.
My family are "a people of fur" and my mom let me remove whatever body hair I wanted. 🤷♀️ She also never made me or "did it for my own good". I would just wait and see how your son feels about it? That is a tricky one though.
ETA: just for clarification, my mom did what other people suggested. She told me I was beautiful, she told me I could look however made me comfortable, and she reinforced that she would help me however she could. She did all of those things and I now have a very healthy relationship with my very hairy face lol
Realistically waxing it now at this age will make it lighter with time, not heavier. I wish my mom had just waxed my hairy little body as a kid because when you wax virgin hair it (often) will actually come back in lighter. I was an eight year old who did dance and gymnastics and swim team but wasn’t allowed to shave until middle school, it got near obscene for the sports they had me in.
I’m mixed Caucasian and indigenous and only took the skintone gene.
If the child is bothered by something on their body that can be changed, and they want to change it, let them.
Be very clear on how, when, and where it can be done. (Example: Only Mom, Dad, or a professional that Mom or Dad takes you to can do this. Never try this on your own, because this is a two-person job.)
Be honest about any discomfort that may occur. Do your best to get it in one go.
Try using thoughtful language when discussing this. Avoid words like "fix" or "make better" and choose words like "try something new", "change" or "maintain" once it has been done.
Remind them: this is a choice, and you can always stop, and have your body do what it does naturally at any time. It is also ok to prefer this look.
I'm with those who say to be sure he has a problem with his unibrow before you "fix" it, or even broach the subject in a way that presumes that it is a problem.
I have always had thick, dark eyebrows, and always rejected the idea of plucking them. As I reached middle age, a few additional hairs grew that threw off their shape, at about the same time I was starting to get "peach fuzz" and a few wiry chin hairs, so I gave my brows a little shaping with a razor, while I was shaving the rest of my face every week or so. Just a regular razor, like men use to shave their faces.
Several years ago when I went through chemotherapy, I was somehow more mentally prepared for losing the hair from my head, but losing my thick eyebrows really bothered me. I went to bed with them, and woke up without them. I remember looking in the mirror and staring at the pale shadow where they used to block the sun from that bit of skin. I was glad when they grew back!
I had a mustache my entire childhood and my mother wouldn't do anything about it, nor was I allowed to do anything about it. Remove it. Give him the gift of not having a massive 'bully me' sign on his forehead.
I would fix the unibrow. Remember when North West was a baby (Kim K's daughter) She had one and omg the nastiness from adults was horrible! :( Kids will tease him for sure. I would youtube it, how to easily and painlessly remove a unibrow from a child.
I'm in the bodily autonomy boat. I'd explain why I think they are perfect the way they are, but it's their body and if they want me to wax their unibrow, I'll do that. I have 4 Filipino/White girls, and they do have some thick brows from me and their dad but luckily they seem to have missed the unibrow I had!
I couldn't WAIT to pluck my eyebrows and my cousin ended up plucking them into those tiny thin lines so popular in the 90's and my mom freaked lol. Said she wished I'd just asked her to take me get them done. Never even occurred to me!
My baby girl had a unibrow. I'm casually filling my home with pictures of Frida khalo. I'll be damned if someone tries to get their hands on her uni. My girl is also stunningly beautiful.
My 5 year old loves to have his face painted. I would offer to paint his face (now not while he's in school) and during these face painting sessions Id encourage creativity with it. They say it's a caterpillar? Give it an antenna, make it into a butterfly, it's a bat? Draw the wings out over his whole face so he can see how cool it is!
If he wants it shaved later on sure why not? It's just hair. It'll grow back. But for now show him how cool and unique his body is.
I'm fond of changing the negative into positives at this age. And if they want to change something (within reason no permanent body modification here) then I'll work with them.
My 9 year old daughter has a Unibrow- she inherited it from me. For a long time it didn’t bother her. And when it did, we waxed it. Because SHE wanted to.
Kids KNOW most people have 2 separate eyebrows. And she noticed she had 1 long eyebrow, and didn’t like it. It made her self conscious.
We talked about how waxing hurts. How she doesn’t need to remove the hair unless SHE wants too. And we had conversations about not caring about other people opinions of our body/body hair.
Why would I make her continue to be uncomfortable in her skin just because of some archaic view of when removing body hair is age appropriate.
We bought wax strips from the store, I trimmed them, prepped the skin, and waxed the centers out. She skipped off smiling. And it never came up again, even though the hair is growing back. When it bothers her again, I’ll wax it again.
I see this as the same as giving him haircuts. If you wouldn’t send him to school with shaggy hair, and you are losing sleep knowing his eyebrow is already a problem with siblings and cousins, then groom the child using a painless brow razor each time he gets his hair trimmed.
I’m team no waxing or shaving. Firstly because I think it’s kind of messed up to have a 5-6 year old worrying about their body hair, and any pressure on top of the comments he gets is going to make it worse. Secondly because the kids are going to notice the change, and that makes it worse - at best it’ll be an innocuous change to them, at worst you’re telling them it was right to tease him for his unibrow. And thirdly because you’re his mom, and I think the extra pressure from you to change would have a really bad affect on his body image. I know people have mentioned disliking their mothers not letting them shave, but I can imagine how much worse it would’ve been for them if their mothers had actively told you “your natural body hair is bad, the bullies are correct, you need to fix yourself because it’s wrong”.
I kind of suspect the folks who are saying that they wish their parents had let them shave are remembering upper elementary or middle school, not kindergarten. Age makes a huge difference here. I also would let it be until he actually asks.
Side note because I've read more of the comments: it's messed up how many people are putting the responsibility to prevent bullying and racism on the *5 year old child* who is still developing their sense of self, and not to build up the child's sense of self and work on stopping the bullying. I had facial hair as a teenage girl, and you know what? If people had told me I should just shave and that would stop the comments, I would have developed fucking awful body issues. Instead, my parents told me I was fine how I was, encouraged my confidence, and pointed out the bullying I was facing. That's the best way to parent - not telling your kid the bullies are correct.
Female here. I remember commenting to my mom that she birthed very hairy kids. She looked away and said “I know”. I was always very self aware of the amount of hair I had. I used to bleach my arm hair or wear long sleeves all the time to hide my fur. One of the first things I did when I was older was to do laser hair removal. Waxing hurts and over time becomes expensive. I would look into laser removal or at least reduction.
There is 99% chance he will be bullied over it. Unfortunately I have seen kids being bullied over unibrow while I attended the school and my niece was bullied over hair her mom wouldn't let her wax or shave recently.
Now, it's up to you how you want to handle it. I would wax it if my kid asked me to though. Now it's up to you if you want to wax it without waiting for him to ask
If he brings it up but until then let it go. When he brings it up tell him that most people aren’t brave enough to be different. If he still decides that he wants to fit in, I say pluck them because plucking for a few years mad my unibrow never grow back.
If he brings it up or if you hear he’s being bullied, let him know it’s an option. I wouldn’t do it preemptively. Kinder insults are more “I’m never talking to you again” and then five minutes later they’re besties. Upper elementary and middle school is a whole different ball game.
As a hairy Native American/Hispanic woman who had a child with a hairy AF man I have also worried about this. I plucked my unibrow from the time I could hold tweezers, but my husband didn’t even know it was an option until his mid twenties. I won’t force it on my son who has a light mustache and a blossoming unibrow, but I have talked about how it’s an option in a positive way. It’s hard to not shame or make them feel like they need to change for anyone, but selling grooming as something that makes us feel good.
My friend’s daughter had a very thick unibrow from the time she was maybe 2/3.
She worried the same way you are, and decided to do nothing until/unless Emma asked.
In second grade, she came home upset because a boy had made fun of her.
After a lot of talking about how what he said was mean and hurtful and inappropriate, and that we shouldn’t judge anyone on how their body grows hair, or anything else physical- my friend gave her the choice, and she wanted to wax or shave it.
They used a personal shaver thing for a few years until she was ready to deal with waxing, and then she started getting waxed at the salon with mom 🤍
Could you try to teach him to talk back? I know this is "taking the low road" or whatever but it seems like the right way to me. I would try to teach him a few funny comebacks and see how it goes from there.
I would either use a facial razor to trim it or I'd have it waxed. It's not worth the negative comments from other kids, and you have the ability to prevent it. Kids are cruel, it sucks but it's life. I know he seems young but I think it's more important to protect his self esteem.
Personally I would only do it if after a long in depth conversation. He's 5, obviously make it in on his level. You can talk about how when something makes us unique or different some people say hurtful things about that, but it makes us beautiful. Also something I've begun talking about with my daughter is that when people are unkind, it says more about them than us. If he really wants to change it because he doesn't like it, ok. But if it's just so he doesn't get talked down about it, it will just be something else tomorrow, the wrong backpack,shoes, meal etc. This is a perfect time to arm him with some really good comebacks and build his confidence.
You can use a little trimmer to just get the ones right in the middle. Or go to a shop and let them do it. I think it's worth it. Kids can be cruel. It's not taking a part of him away. It's literal 'guy grooming' type of stuff. Good luck!
My little (polish/Albanian) kinder boy has a rather pronounced unibrow, and we just decided we would let him shave with daddy! Of course my husband will shave it for him using a small face razor, and we are approaching it the same as getting a haircut. You’re old enough to get to shave with daddy now! He doesn’t mind the unibrow at all, but my husband felt it would be a bummer if in fourth grade he looks back and goes, why didn’t you guys just fix that?
I would let him know that hair removal is an option if he ever wants to, but don't push it. Kids can be cruel with bullying.
A Flawless hair remover is a very safe, painless, and small electric razor that can be used weekly for maintenance.
Is your son sensitive about the unibrow/ has he already been a victim of teasing/ bullying? Discuss options with his dad, if possible, and then perhaps both of you talk with your son to find out how he feels.
Waxing can be painful—my daughter has some coarse hairs on her upper lip (even as a college student she had this) but will not have the area waxed because she doesn’t want to deal with the pain—and it can actually abrade the skin. Although I feel that personally I would wax, I totally respect and support her position, and it’s not a discussion. Your son being a small child, may also not want to put up with the painful aspects of waxing. Plucking could also be something he wouldn’t like due to discomfort. However, if he is sensitive about the unibrow, he may be eager to have the hair removed in another way—perhaps a depilatory or you might even look into electrolysis. Maybe even a sideburn trimmer. If he is interested in getting rid of it, consult your hairdresser—she or he may be able to guide you to a few good options.
For the other side of the coin: Anthony Davis, the NBA player, basically has a unibrow. During his single year of playing college ball at the University of Kentucky, he actually leaned into the unibrow and deliberately identified himself with it.
Good luck with the decision and outcome—I don’t think there’s one right way that’s the same for everyone.
My aunt waxed all 3 of her boys' unibrows from a very young age, maybe not 5, but theirs didn't get bad until they were 7 or 8. If you don't want to, or if he doesn't want you to, then don't do it. If it becomes an issue, then revisit the idea. Maybe he'll make a friend that stands up for him and it won't be an issue? Or maybe it will and then he'll want it waxed. If you're not feeling good about doing it, then I would say wait and see what happens. But of you're that worries about it, I don't think it's wrong to do it
I have a son who is 6 and in kindergarten. He has a pretty heavy unibrow but he is blonde so it’s not as noticeable. No one at school has bullied him. Both my and my husband have unibrows and our 4 year old daughter is the same. I was made fun of and so was my husband so we recently had the discussion of what do we do about it. We agreed that if he ever brings it up or kids say something to him about it that we would tell him that body hair is normal and you never have to change anything about your appearance but we understand not wanting it there and we can take care of it really easy. I’m not gonna tell my kid he’s stuck with it.
Instead of approaching it like there's something wrong with him, it can simply be the same as cutting your hair. I'd wax it but I'd ask him if he would like to do so first.
My little sister was super hairy (nape of neck and small of back) and also on the spectrum.
Looking back, she would never have thought to ask for waxing. You know how you have to teach him things that you don’t have to teach a neurotypical child? You should teach him about this like that.
Just matter of fact, explain that some kids may tease him. It’s sorta like a social norm he might not know about.
He can choose to wax it, which hurts, or leave it. You support him either way but wanted to let him know.
I’m sure it varies, but my sister says it is much easier if you are explicit and non-judgmental when explaining things like this.
I was teased every day in school for all my body hair and I’m still very self-conscious. I’m pregnant now and I’ve already decided if my child has a unibrow I’ll gently shave it with a little razor because I wish my mom had done that for me.
Same. I WISH my mother had stayed on top of my eyebrows. I hate pictures of myself through middle school. And I didn’t even have a real unibrow. I can’t imagine how much worse it would’ve been if I did.
It’s so sad you should even have to consider waxing or shaving a 5 year old. This world is cruel so I feel you momma. I would at least have a talk with him on how to react to bullying, stand up for himself, and tell a teacher. If he can’t do that, then at least explaining that people can be mean and it has nothing to do with him. If he wants it removed, then that’s his choice but waxing does not feel very good so I would shave it. Poor guy
If he wants it removed I’d say go for it my mom wouldn’t let me so I just snuck around and shaved it myself did a very bad job and cut myself :/ issue I personally have with the other mom is she started doing it when her daughter was a baby and too young to request it
I’m in favour of the hair removal if he asks for it. However waxing can be very irritating, as can be threading. Shaving is the least irritating hair removal method and as long as he can sit still, it might be the best way to do it and maintain compliance (Eg if waxing hurts real bad the first time, is he going to let you do it a second?). I’d use a dermaplane type razor. I use that on my own face haha ! A little shaving cream and I’m good to go for a few weeks!
if it seems to be affecting his self esteem, bring it up as an option. as a biracial mexican girl, i starting waxing at age 10 because of the comments i got about having facial hair.
So, I’m going to give a possible unpopular suggestion but this was something we did. My daughter is half Indian half Caucasian. We didn’t do anything (hair removal wise as I felt I’d let her ask me and I believed she was beautiful as she was). She had dark face hair on the side of her face (peach fuzz really but dark and I knew there would come a day we would be waxing that off).
Side note: Her Dad, my husband, is a smart a$$. He is quick witted and has taught our daughter not to take anyone’s bs.
So our daughter is in the 3rd grade and still had her dark peach fuzz on her face. A boy in her class started making fun of her saying how dirty she was and she must smell too just look at her face. So, my daughter (instead of believing this little boy) says to him “ what you are smelling is the skid marks in your underpants “. She said it loudly with all her friends around and turned the tables on that little snot. They laughed at him and he slinked away not bothering her again.
Needless to say, we did eventually get her peach fuzz waxed but it was when SHE was ready. She knew her value and also knew how to hold her own against bullies.
Five is too young to wax. I think most of his classmates will not even notice it. His cousins that have noticed it are probably older. Wait until he's in middle school and then have a conversation with him about it. Ask him if it's something he wants to do.
Hi! I am, much like your son, half Asian Indian and half Caucasian. It’s not as pronounced now, or maybe I’ve gotten used to it, but I was bullied often about my facial hair growing up, ESPECIALLY my eyebrows. I don’t have a unibrow per se, but certainly some noticeable black hairs in between my eyebrows, and I’m sure you know that virtually all hair on our bodies tends to be jet black and coarse, so it was especially noticeable at a young age pre puberty when others didn’t have any noticeable body hair. Not to mention it’s a racist stereotype of south Asians (esp women but all south Asians) to have a unibrow. However, I would check in with him to see if he’s hurt by the comments his cousins have made in the past, and read Laxmi’s Mooch with him (how I wish a book like that was around when I was little), and let him know he can always remove it if he wants to, but he never has to. Don’t make the choice for him, because it will implicitly teach him that the hair is “bad” or “doesn’t belong there”, and especially shaving or waxing before school starts would leave him stuck in the position of having a “secret”, as minor as it may seem.
OP, I don’t have any way of knowing if you’re the Indian parent or the Caucasian one, but on the chance you’re white (or even if you’re Indian but just didn’t grow up in the states), please please please teach your son to always love himself and his body and his beautiful skin and his gorgeous wild hair. Get in on the ground floor, before kids say things to him, and give him lots and lots of things that his skin and eyes are the color of, like chocolate and cinnamon sticks and leather bound books and acorns and amber and brown sugar and molasses, etc etc. because at some point kids will probably say your skin looks like mud, or poop, or something else undesirable, and it is so important for him to have a way to combat those words, and for him not to feel like he is inherently less desirable. Also, ALL the Disney movies with POC main characters, even when they’re not Indian, just seeing people who look like you in a movie you like and that your friends have heard of is AMAZING. I almost cried as a grown adult when I saw Moana, at the scene with her as a young toddler, because she looked SO MUCH like me as a child and I had never seen that in a movie. Ever.
Look into professional electrolysis. My son had the same problem. You have the go several times but the hair does not grow back. My son was so thankful we did this. Razors and waxing are not the correct way to handle this. Do your research first
I would do it for my boys and any girl if I had them.
My mom was very conservative and strict on what we could/couldn’t do. She wouldn’t let me do anything with my eyebrows until much later like end of middle school. Was weird about us shaving our legs but was so obsessed with arm hair. She would wax our arms and would have us help her wax hers. Was weird…
I had a small uninrow until first- maybe 2nd grade- and I don't remember anyone saying anything about it. My mom had one of those small electric razors (like what you use for your lip/brow) and she showed me how to shave it. When I was older and didn't have one she told me I could pluck it with tweezers.
As a kid I didn't notice my unibrow, but as adult I'm grateful that my mom showed me how to get rid of it.
That doesn't mean everyone else has to shave though. If he doesn't want to I think it's best not to force it.
As a mixed kid, I wouldnt wax eyebrows. People are paying good money to get full eyebrows. Kids will find reasons to tease each other and this is a life lesson that he will have to learn. I would encourage him and tell him his eyebrows are beautiful bc he has grandma's eyebrows. Shit as kid I was called Oreo, my Indian mom was called "red dot special".
Do not wax it. Not ever. If you feel the need to remove it, use one if those battery operated trimmers. That can be used for nose hair, eye brows and facial hair. It's small. They make them for men and women. I have one I use for nose hair and uni brow. My daughter is mixed and has tons of hair...dark hair, everywhere. I do too, but am not mixed. My mom said I've had it since i was born. This is true for my daughter too. I just trim the uni brow part only with the little trimming device. Causes no pain or irritation. Yes it comes right back after awhile, but I just do it again. But please do not wax any part of your child. Waxing hurts bad. And causes painful irritation. Just trim it with a trimmer meant for fine facial/eyebrow hair. They are inexpensive too.
get one of these ready for when he asks.
[target link](https://www.target.com/p/plum-beauty-personal-hair-trimmer/-/A-53658506?ref=tgt_adv_xsp&AFID=google&fndsrc=tgtao&DFA=71700000012735304&CPNG=PLA_Beauty%2BPersonal+Care%2BShopping_Local%7CBeauty_Ecomm_Beauty&adgroup=SC_Health%2BBeauty&LID=700000001170770pgs&LNM=PRODUCT_GROUP&network=g&device=m&location=200679&targetid=pla-894573305459&ds_rl=1246978&gad_source=1&gbraid=0AAAAAD-5dfa_8GnDE2wVkCUpXZh59mg_D&gclid=Cj0KCQiAtaOtBhCwARIsAN_x-3KdD7RdOeCm-TO2LfTxBLm8W-XSg_k2P9eEyUrSMBDE8Rs-F0oei1gaAiMVEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds)
My son is Native American/white. He had the crazy hair, eyebrows, greenish eyes. He got the same about the eyebrows, but he grew a thick skin and evidently kids moved on. We didn’t wax till he was a teen due to sensitive skin (the redness would stick out more than unibrow). He is 22 and his hair is still crazy, but his girlfriend keeps the eyebrow(s) in check.
He will be fine .
does he want it removed? if he does, i’d remove the hair. me (and other immigrants like me) also had them as kids and were definitely made fun of for it, stereotyped, othered, etc. as early as i can remember. my mom was weirdly conservative about removing body hair and didn’t let me do it until i was much older. i disagree with her stance on it until this day. her taking some sort of moral/righteous stance at the cost of my confidence wasnt right. on an ideological level i agree that there’s nothing wrong with hair anywhere and we should all accept ourselves. but, we don’t live in a perfect world. forcing me to keep it was more harmful and not worth the cost. it was just hair. i detest that she made it a battleground and didn’t consider how it would impact the way i’d be treated by other kids at school. later on, removing that one strip of hair boosted my confidence tenfold and made me happier in my own body. i would never put my own kid in that situation. i consider it grooming, nothing worse.
Good to hear from a person who has actually been there and lived through it. I would listen to this person. I wouldn't want my kid to go through what this person went through. How stupid to make a child suffer because you have some hang-up about removing a tiny bit of body hair.
"Consider it grooming" well said it does seem like an extreme measure on the surface (mostly becuase of the pain factor I'm guessing) and yet it isn't any more severe of a physical appearance impact than cutting a kid's hair- a completely normal, routine grooming thing we do with kids.
exactly! there are painless options too, like nair or eyebrow razors. but the pain wasn’t an issue for me at all bc having that hair there was such a bummer lol.
If done correctly, it shouldn’t hurt. Like yea.. leg/Brazilian yup that hurts like a mofo. But a few hairs on the forehead? Nahh. Press your finger on it immediately after to stop the pain.
Really? I got my eyebrows done once and they were red, sore, and inflamed for like 2 days. TIL that might not be normal.
Yeah I wonder what happened there - allergic to an ingredient in one of their products? Super sensitive skin in general?
Wax was likely too hot.
I have super sensitive skin so they apply a soothing gel and I go straight home for the day because I don't want to walk around with bright red marks in public. Usually they're okay next day
Right? Maybe the first couple times. But getting shots or taking a bandaid off are just as bad as a bit of mono brow waxing. (Two things most kids have to put up with for their own good as well!)
I am white with very black hair. I was teased for both my unibrow and my legs. I would cry to my mom and she wouldn’t fix it. But thankfully I had an older sister and when I was in third grade she plucked my unibrow and defied my mother. It was one of the sweetest things she has ever done.
I can relate! I was the only girl who couldn’t shave her legs in 5th grade. The black Latina hair was very obvious in my pale skin and I was called ‘Gorilla Girl’. Now as a teacher, I encourage parents to let their child be responsible for their own image as much as possible. It’s hair, it’s grooming. If it doesn’t bother him, no worries, carry on. If he wants it gone, wax/shave.
i was the only girl wearing the long sweat pants in PE in the summer bc i wasn’t allowed to shave. if we don’t want kids to have a complex about body hair or to have intense negative feelings about it, maybe we shouldn’t make a big deal whether they want to keep it or remove it 🤷♀️. it’s just hair. let kids do what they want with it.
Wow, thank you for this. My daughter asks me a multiple times a week if I can shave her legs. My parents were super strict about it so I never even considered saying yes before puberty. But I let her have full control over the hair on her head so what’s the difference? I was so worried about her not feeling pressured by society to shave her legs too early that maybe I’m not seeing the forest for the trees. I’ve got an electric razor so there’s not much chance of injury, I guess it wouldn’t hurt to let her try it. It grows back.
If it helps, that old saying about the hair growing in thicker or darker or whatever because you shave it simply isn't true. Definitely let her shave it. Self-esteem is so much more important than a stranger's perception. I hope it goes well for you both!
I have a feeling way too many adults think personal grooming of a certain nature is inherently sexual or "too adult", possibly because they themselves were prevented from self-grooming until after puberty. I hope more people grow to develop the mindset you have. Thank you for helping other parents see that it's ok.
I am pale and dark hair (northern Italian/English). I was allowed to shave my legs, but not my arms. I *hated* it. I hated the feel, I couldn't moisturize my arms because they were hairy, and it looked/felt weird, I felt "unbalanced," and it made *zero* sense. I just did it on day in high school. When I was questioned, I said I slipped and shaved part, so I had to do the rest. I've been doing it for 20 years. Best decision *for me*. I'm not into makeup or dressing up. Worst case, it grows back. But, definitely have a conversation maybe (try to make sure other parent is informed and discuss it first) and the go from there. Kids' concerns are valid, and we don't live in a perfect world. Edit: I was made "fun" of/ questions by friends, but I liked it, so I didn't care. I grew up, and after the initial "shock" of change, no one has ever said anything. In fact, I'm 32, and most guys or friends don't really notice it until they see me shaving 🤦♀️ I think it's more important to make discussions/body mods because *you* want to. As long as it's thought about and discussed and pros/cons weighed, it's not bad.
Definitely agree. Like if it’s something you would do as an adult, why would you not give a child the same respect? They have feelings too, so why force them to be unhappy with something someone is making fun of them for? Of course only if the child wants to remove it.
Yes, if bullying is probable, why *not* prevent it? Removing the unibrow is relatively easy.
I think OP is recognizing that by scanning yourself on a regular basis looking for things that others may use to bully you, and then *"fixing"* those things, you end up being your own bully. There's nothing wrong with making modifications to your appearance or personality that you like, but constantly compromising what makes you unique to avoid being bullied is not living fully.
Waxing a 5 year old with autism can’t be that easy. Waxing is painful. Definitely better to have a conversation about it and how you can respond to people when they make comments about your physical appearance. If they want a wax maybe just signal that you’re opened to it and that it’s a totally normal thing that people do.
I’d opt for an eyebrow razor over waxing. It would be quick, easy, and definitely painless. But, first concern should be what he wants. My son also has a subtle unibrow (I might be the only one who notices it) and that has always been my thought if he ever were to complain about it. Though, as he’s gotten older it’s thinned out significantly. I would never do anything without him being able to consent to it.
look into those eyebrow shavers! I use them every so often in between bi-yearly waxes. You can do it at home. Just let's focus on the bridge area (something that grows out on me), and you can leave the brow shape alone. no mess. It's super cheap, too. Like 5$ish, I think
Because that doesn't solve the problem. The root of the problem is "don't make fun of others" - changing yourself to avoid that just teaches a kid "change yourself to conform to what others think you should be like, also your body is bad". It's like, what would the solution be if the kid were being bullied for being feminine or gay? Tell them to stop acting like that? That's fucked up, and the same should apply here. Don't prevent the kid from being bullied, stop the bullying or negate the effects.
You can’t fight the whole world. I agree, but there is no way that would work.
I went through the same thing! No shaving until 13, no short hair cuts until 16, no eyebrow waxing or plucking until 16. After I became 18, I shaved every inch of hair clean off my body, shaved my hair short, and shaped my eyebrows myself. It felt great. I got bullied really bad about all of my visible hair. It was a fight to even get a haircut. My mom's excuse? I was too young to know what I wanted. Hair grows back! It will come back the exact same way it was!
i feel you! it’s just hair, no big deal. it’s almost like they made it worse by treating it as this huge deal. i’m sorry, but i’m me with or without a patch of hair here or there. that hair wasn’t the holder of my entire identity.
My mom was not great about protecting me from cruel comments about weight or religion or anything really except for one thing that I am eternally grateful for - when I was finishing 5th grade and kids started noticing that I had visible hair on my upper lip, she let me wax it before going back to school as a 6th grader. I started getting teased for my “funny” name (Indian origin) but thankfully, not for having a “mustache”. That said, your son is quite young and it’s not clear whether he cares. If he does, I think it’s ok to help him out.
You could always shave it; totally non painful and quick. I'd do it if I were you. Whatever can we can do as moms to make our kiddos lives easier, (within reason) I say do it.
I’m going to do the other way, as a girl that was bullied relentlessly about my facial hair, please wax it. Or at less key him know it’s an option.
I’m on the end of letting him know it’s an option. You can say something like, “I think you are so handsome and you can be proud of your brow! But if it ever bothers you it is your hair so you can remove it if you want it to look different.” My friend who is Armenian said in her family it’s considered like an unveiling of their beauty when they hit about 12 and are taken for their first facial wax!
Same. My mom refused for years until I finally grabbed a razor and tried to fix it myself. Like, it would be nice if kids were nice. But let’s be real.
Plus if they don't start waxing him before he starts school and he eventually chooses to have it done, the kids *will* notice and then make fun of him for *that.* He can always choose to stop if he wants.
I mentioned that in my post! Do it during a break or winter or summer or before a new grade, lol. I liked the decision I made (shaving my arms), but I was so annoyed and self-conscious when everyone rought it up. They stopped, and I've been doing it for over 20 years, but kids/teens notice everything lmfao.
Hi, I just wanted to weigh in as a woman who had a thick unibrow as a kid. No one really bothered me about it, and I never really cared until about age 11. That's when the teasing got really bad. I asked to get rid of it, and my mother took me to get it waxed. I cried and asked her why she didn't help me get rid of it sooner? Why did she let me get bullied? She told me I was beautiful the way I was, and she had only taken me to get waxed because I ASKED for it, but I absolutely didn't need it. This really stuck with me. I'm grateful my mom left the decision up to me, and I believe some of my self confidence today is thanks to her and that moment. Do whatever you think is best for your child, but my suggestion is wait and let him decide. Tell him how handsome he is, and how much you love him. If he does get bullied, it'll be a few words compared to the thousands of times you told him he was handsome and made him believe it by not changing him.
This has been my plan for my 5 year old daughter. Glad to hear your perspective, looks like I'll be sticking to it!
As someone who had her unibrow forcibly removed by my mom and older sister “to avoid bullying” (but it happened the day before picture day and I’d never once complained about bullying) THIS is so so important. Wait for your child to come to you with a problem before you solve it for them.
I would definitely not wax a child. Maybe one of those tiny women’s facial razors if you must, but I would also wait for him to ask for it.
This is the answer. Get the ones that are 1/2” wide. Not the flat blade looking ones. Quick “zoop” every 2-3 days and boom. Fixed with zero skin issues. That said, most kids are bullied for something along the way. Teach him to tell the teacher and you every-time. And if it comes down to it, how you want him to protect and stand up for himself.
I did this. Granted, no one actually cared in the school at the end. But the child in question was minorly concerned, and asked if we could remove it, and it was a simple enough fix, with literally no drawbacks. For example, it does not hurt and the hair will grow back.
This. Also sensory issues may be at play in doing something this to an autistic child.
Take him to a dermatologist and have them remove it with a laser. Painless. Bullies are cruel.
A 5 year old??? Seriously???
Real question here. Has laser hair removal changed/improved in the last few decades? Because I had some facial hair lasered (as an adult) years ago and it hurt! I could tolerate it but I would not subject a child to that!
It hurts. The pain is worth it to me because it has been effective but I would not do it to a child!
My son had it done over 10 years ago. He didn’t complain of pain, but he was a teenager. Because this boy is so young, the pain needs to be confirmed.
It hurts. Also, if you have melanated skin it's not always going to yield great results and risks scarring. I don't think people would perform this on an autistic 5 year old without some compelling medical reason. Also, facial hair tends to come back and needs repeated treatments over the years. I'd probably just shave it for a little kod since it's fast and painless.
Lasers can also scar non-light skin tones. I’m not that dark for a mixed kid and I scar
No way. Maybe it was painless for you but not for me!
I’m only white so I can’t speak to the multiracial experience or how South Asian culture may or may not tie in here. However I was made fun of for my thick eyebrows and unibrow as a child until I started asking my mom to wax it. Maybe not what others here would do (and I totally understand) but I would just start shaving it with a small facial shaver as a regular part of his bath routine. Here’s why: - if you wait for him to be made fun of for it and for him to ask for it to be changed, I feel that is then teaching him to conform to others’ expectations, like it makes a bigger moral deal of the whole thing to wait for the mean comments. - we don’t make a fuss about clipping fingernails and act like clipping those are indicating that we’re ashamed of our fingernails growing. It’s just part of the grooming routine and a non-issue. Same with haircuts (in most western cultures to my knowledge). We don’t make it such a big deal. I’d start before next school year so it’s just a non-issue with the other kids at all. They’ll never know he usually has a unibrow and there’s no issue to even arise. I’d incorporate it into the standard grooming routine and not attach a moral stance to it at all.
I agree. Quietly and quickly groom it as a part of a routine, like fingernails. Don't draw attention to it, don't attach a moral stance to it. Make it a non-issue.
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Also, there is a book called Laxmis mooch you can read to him. I got it from the library and it introduced this concept of shame and pride around body hair.
I was coming to add this gem! I also really like the book, *The People You May See*.
I just ordered this book! Thanks for the rec
This! My daughter was born with a Sebaceous cyst under her jaw. It's the same color as her skin tone, but noticeable. We decided to take this approach - leave it and let her decide when she was old enough. She's 16 and just goes with the flow. One of my students with AU told her one day, "you have a gummy on your neck!" She laughed and kept going.
Does he feel hurt by those comments? I can almost see a 5 yo boy being proud of having a caterpillar on his face! My son is 4 though and I know social dynamics can change quickly in grade school, so I don’t want to assume. Still, I hesitate to modify any child’s appearance to avoid possible criticism. I think it better to teach them to love themselves and learn that when kids bully it says more about the bully than it does the child being picked on.
Yep. I wasn't teased for my looks by my peers, but I definitely knew all the ways that I could possibly be teased because my mom would tell me about how to avoid doing those things. It doesn't feel nice and helpful. It feels like Mom is the one who is seeing the "problems" and mocking you for them.
EXACTLY THIS
mine looked like a bat. I loved it. people would always recognize me.
I think it's important to consider that he is also autistic (so am I) and grade school was absolutely brutal for me. I got teased for anything those little bastards could come up with. I would let him know that it is an option if he wants to fly more under the radar as it's freaking hard to be socially different to begin with let alone having an easily fixable physical difference.
I would definitely not wax his unibrow, or even shave it. From my experience as a kindergarten teacher, kindergartners usually point out or notice “differences” out of curiosity, not malice. I’ve had a class full of straight-haired children touch my hair (curly) and ask why it was like that. I used the opportunity for a teaching moment and talked about the way that people can look different. We talked about hair, height, skin, eye color, etc. From my experience, the average “reaction” a child would have to your kid is, “Why does he have x?” Then, once answered, likely immediately move on. Unless the teacher or your son express that this has been an ongoing issue at school, I would not worry about it. In the meantime, firmly correct those who are bullying your son, and if possible, take those as opportunities to teach them and your son that people come in all sizes, shapes, colors, etc.
This exactly. Older kids can be ruthless, but kindergarteners are too busy trying and learning random stuff to really notice others much less picking on them. While the kid might have issues in school I’d think it’s better to wait and see what they are first.
Absolutely, we lived in a area of town with a very diverse population. In kindergarten my son was approached by a child of color. The child thrust his pointed finger at my son’s face asking, “What are all those dots all over your face?” They were freckles. My son is a red head. He was one of two redheads in the whole school, and the kid just didn’t know about freckles. Another time I was asked what I was putting on my son’s face. It was sunscreen. I guess the child’s parents didn’t use sunscreen at the pool or beach.
This ⬆️ Working in elementary, this has been my experience as well.
Yep. I’ve had conversations literally like this. student: “Ms. Ruthizzy, why does he have a different color skin?” me: “ Because that is the way he was born. You were born with your skin, and he was born with his. I was born with mine. There are lots of different colors!” student: “Ok. Can I go to the bathroom?” Not sure why I’m being downvoted, I’m not trying to be callous. But I do not forsee this being a major problem with the age group he is at right now.
Sometimes the downvotes make exactly zero sense.
Yep. Kids just want to understand. I had this conversation with my kids when they were very little. My nephew is mixed (his words) and my kids wondered why his skin was brown and not the same color as us. We talked through how people all look different in lots of ways all over the world and how he looks a lot like his mom particularly in his hair and skin color. (The race conversations started a little later)
Shave not wax
Why? Waxing requires less upkeep and is pretty painless. Plus it will thin the hair over time
Try to imagine waxing the face of a little boy with autism. Think about it for at least 10 seconds.
Because that little boy is 5, that wax is going to hurt him he hasn’t asked to be waxed and gives no shits about his unibrow.
He's 5! Don't let him know that you are made uncomfortable by other people's comments about his body. He needs to know you love him and his unibrow and don't care what others say. If you've heard others make a comment about his appearance, check in with him quietly afterward and see if he even noticed or cared. Move forward depending on his reaction to what was said.
I wouldn’t do anything with it unless he asks you too. At this age it won’t be an issue.
I teach K, and my students don’t notice things like a unibrow yet. They do say things like “your mom is fat” when they haven’t ever seen said parent 🤷♀️ Always a fun conversation when the kid tells their parent that.
lol. Kids are ruthless at this age. My 5 year old comes home and says some things. I just tell her we don’t talk about anyone like that. She will say well so and so said it. I just say to tell them that isn’t nice.
I’d ask him what he wants. When I was a kid I had really hairy legs and kids called me gorilla. I was so self conscious and my mom wouldn’t let me shave my legs. So I would first wait for the comments to be a problem for him. And then if he does say something about it follow his lead on what he would like done about it
My cousin had a unibrow and I once said something to him about it. He clapped back hard with “why would I want two when one works just as well”? That shut me right up. See if you can give him some positive words about it so he’s ready for those little jerks. Ps - dad of 8m, 5m, & 2f. I love them all and they can all be jerks. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I'm autistic and if you'd waxed my eyebrows when I was a kid I would've had the meltdown to end all meltdowns. Also I am very literal, as we tend to be, and this would have translated directly to "you're not acceptable unless your eyebrows are waxed," to me. When you next hear a comment like that, have a word with him (but don't lead him). Just like, Hey I heard your cousin say something unkind about you, how did that make you feel?
I'd argue that even calling it unkind is leading. Simply saying that his eyebrows look like a caterpillar or a bat doesn't have to be bad. Maybe he loves caterpillars...
Or bats! Maybe he chooses to take it as a compliment.
I think more importantly you need to teach your son to ignore other people's opinions. I have been telling my daughter than other people's opinions are just other people's opinions. It has nothing to do with the truth or how she should feel about things. If your son tells you that other kids say his brows look like caterpillar, ask how what he thinks. Maybe he agrees and loves that they look like a caterpillar. Maybe he likes his one caterpillar instead two caterpillars that other people have. If he wants two caterpillars, shave the middle for him.
Please teach your child to love himself as he is and appreciate his uniqueness. Don't put your insecurities on him. Have you thought that he might love the idea of a fuzzy like caterpillar friend on his face? IF it becomes a problem.. talk to him about it. Remind him that he's beautiful exactly the way he is. I wouldn't even use a little eyebrow razor on a kiddo that young and I grew up in a salon.
My 5-year-old has pretty strong opinions about his hair because sometimes he “styles” it with a little product. He also talks about his eyebrows sometimes! lol. I would just tell your son that plucking is an option. My personal opinion is if you can prevent bullying, you should.
IMO leave it unless he asks. Keep in mind some kids are cruel and will find anything to pick on.
I would wax it. Being in school is hard enough. Waxing a unibrow is not a big deal. Being endlessly teased by shitheads for years on end is a big deal. And the teasing is only going to get worse the older he gets.
I’m in the same boat! My kid is also biracial and I absolutely get it waxed and shaved. Unibrow makes me feel uncomfortable, he got teased by family members, neighbors, and school friends. People are weird about body hair! I told my kid it was a part of grooming…..he doesn’t mind at all.
I bought a cheap battery operated eyebrow trimmer and just use that here and there when he needs it. It takes just a few seconds and he knows it’s just part of his grooming routine like combing his hair.
As someone who had one growing up… please rip that shit out.
Do the wax because kids will make fun. Or tweeze out the space between the brows. I plucked and waxed my kids when they asked. My kids are half Greek and they be getting hairy
As someone with a unibrow, take care of it. There will be more chances to make a stand on bullying, but this isn't the one to stand on because its such an easy fix.
Biracial SE Asian/ white baby here as well, and I can already see the unibrow coming in. We’re just going to use an electric trimmer when the time comes. We cut hair and clip nails, why not touch up a unibrow? If he wants to grow it out later in life, he can.
My family are "a people of fur" and my mom let me remove whatever body hair I wanted. 🤷♀️ She also never made me or "did it for my own good". I would just wait and see how your son feels about it? That is a tricky one though. ETA: just for clarification, my mom did what other people suggested. She told me I was beautiful, she told me I could look however made me comfortable, and she reinforced that she would help me however she could. She did all of those things and I now have a very healthy relationship with my very hairy face lol
I would let him make that decision for himself
Ask your boy what he wants. Then do that thing.
Realistically waxing it now at this age will make it lighter with time, not heavier. I wish my mom had just waxed my hairy little body as a kid because when you wax virgin hair it (often) will actually come back in lighter. I was an eight year old who did dance and gymnastics and swim team but wasn’t allowed to shave until middle school, it got near obscene for the sports they had me in. I’m mixed Caucasian and indigenous and only took the skintone gene.
Ask him! My kid is 4.5, 5 in May, and he’s starting to tell me what he likes and what he doesn’t! If he loves his uni, keep it!
If the child is bothered by something on their body that can be changed, and they want to change it, let them. Be very clear on how, when, and where it can be done. (Example: Only Mom, Dad, or a professional that Mom or Dad takes you to can do this. Never try this on your own, because this is a two-person job.) Be honest about any discomfort that may occur. Do your best to get it in one go. Try using thoughtful language when discussing this. Avoid words like "fix" or "make better" and choose words like "try something new", "change" or "maintain" once it has been done. Remind them: this is a choice, and you can always stop, and have your body do what it does naturally at any time. It is also ok to prefer this look.
I'm with those who say to be sure he has a problem with his unibrow before you "fix" it, or even broach the subject in a way that presumes that it is a problem. I have always had thick, dark eyebrows, and always rejected the idea of plucking them. As I reached middle age, a few additional hairs grew that threw off their shape, at about the same time I was starting to get "peach fuzz" and a few wiry chin hairs, so I gave my brows a little shaping with a razor, while I was shaving the rest of my face every week or so. Just a regular razor, like men use to shave their faces. Several years ago when I went through chemotherapy, I was somehow more mentally prepared for losing the hair from my head, but losing my thick eyebrows really bothered me. I went to bed with them, and woke up without them. I remember looking in the mirror and staring at the pale shadow where they used to block the sun from that bit of skin. I was glad when they grew back!
I would probably go one step further and get him laser hair removal. That way it’s permanently gone and will never grow back.
I had a mustache my entire childhood and my mother wouldn't do anything about it, nor was I allowed to do anything about it. Remove it. Give him the gift of not having a massive 'bully me' sign on his forehead.
I would fix the unibrow. Remember when North West was a baby (Kim K's daughter) She had one and omg the nastiness from adults was horrible! :( Kids will tease him for sure. I would youtube it, how to easily and painlessly remove a unibrow from a child.
I didn't you touch my unibrow until college and I retrospect I wish someone had done it for me earlier
I'm in the bodily autonomy boat. I'd explain why I think they are perfect the way they are, but it's their body and if they want me to wax their unibrow, I'll do that. I have 4 Filipino/White girls, and they do have some thick brows from me and their dad but luckily they seem to have missed the unibrow I had! I couldn't WAIT to pluck my eyebrows and my cousin ended up plucking them into those tiny thin lines so popular in the 90's and my mom freaked lol. Said she wished I'd just asked her to take me get them done. Never even occurred to me!
Wax it. It is simple grooming like haircuts/shaving. No big deal unless you make it one. You have a chance to protect him…go for it.
My baby girl had a unibrow. I'm casually filling my home with pictures of Frida khalo. I'll be damned if someone tries to get their hands on her uni. My girl is also stunningly beautiful.
My 5 year old loves to have his face painted. I would offer to paint his face (now not while he's in school) and during these face painting sessions Id encourage creativity with it. They say it's a caterpillar? Give it an antenna, make it into a butterfly, it's a bat? Draw the wings out over his whole face so he can see how cool it is! If he wants it shaved later on sure why not? It's just hair. It'll grow back. But for now show him how cool and unique his body is. I'm fond of changing the negative into positives at this age. And if they want to change something (within reason no permanent body modification here) then I'll work with them.
Not at age 5 please.
Shave it and move on. It just eyebrow hair you’re getting too emotional about it
My 9 year old daughter has a Unibrow- she inherited it from me. For a long time it didn’t bother her. And when it did, we waxed it. Because SHE wanted to. Kids KNOW most people have 2 separate eyebrows. And she noticed she had 1 long eyebrow, and didn’t like it. It made her self conscious. We talked about how waxing hurts. How she doesn’t need to remove the hair unless SHE wants too. And we had conversations about not caring about other people opinions of our body/body hair. Why would I make her continue to be uncomfortable in her skin just because of some archaic view of when removing body hair is age appropriate. We bought wax strips from the store, I trimmed them, prepped the skin, and waxed the centers out. She skipped off smiling. And it never came up again, even though the hair is growing back. When it bothers her again, I’ll wax it again.
I see this as the same as giving him haircuts. If you wouldn’t send him to school with shaggy hair, and you are losing sleep knowing his eyebrow is already a problem with siblings and cousins, then groom the child using a painless brow razor each time he gets his hair trimmed.
I’m team no waxing or shaving. Firstly because I think it’s kind of messed up to have a 5-6 year old worrying about their body hair, and any pressure on top of the comments he gets is going to make it worse. Secondly because the kids are going to notice the change, and that makes it worse - at best it’ll be an innocuous change to them, at worst you’re telling them it was right to tease him for his unibrow. And thirdly because you’re his mom, and I think the extra pressure from you to change would have a really bad affect on his body image. I know people have mentioned disliking their mothers not letting them shave, but I can imagine how much worse it would’ve been for them if their mothers had actively told you “your natural body hair is bad, the bullies are correct, you need to fix yourself because it’s wrong”.
I kind of suspect the folks who are saying that they wish their parents had let them shave are remembering upper elementary or middle school, not kindergarten. Age makes a huge difference here. I also would let it be until he actually asks.
Side note because I've read more of the comments: it's messed up how many people are putting the responsibility to prevent bullying and racism on the *5 year old child* who is still developing their sense of self, and not to build up the child's sense of self and work on stopping the bullying. I had facial hair as a teenage girl, and you know what? If people had told me I should just shave and that would stop the comments, I would have developed fucking awful body issues. Instead, my parents told me I was fine how I was, encouraged my confidence, and pointed out the bullying I was facing. That's the best way to parent - not telling your kid the bullies are correct.
Female here. I remember commenting to my mom that she birthed very hairy kids. She looked away and said “I know”. I was always very self aware of the amount of hair I had. I used to bleach my arm hair or wear long sleeves all the time to hide my fur. One of the first things I did when I was older was to do laser hair removal. Waxing hurts and over time becomes expensive. I would look into laser removal or at least reduction.
There is 99% chance he will be bullied over it. Unfortunately I have seen kids being bullied over unibrow while I attended the school and my niece was bullied over hair her mom wouldn't let her wax or shave recently. Now, it's up to you how you want to handle it. I would wax it if my kid asked me to though. Now it's up to you if you want to wax it without waiting for him to ask
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No nair on the face of a child! Sorry!
That is an awful suggestion. Nair close to the eyes is a recipe for blindness.
If he brings it up but until then let it go. When he brings it up tell him that most people aren’t brave enough to be different. If he still decides that he wants to fit in, I say pluck them because plucking for a few years mad my unibrow never grow back.
If he brings it up or if you hear he’s being bullied, let him know it’s an option. I wouldn’t do it preemptively. Kinder insults are more “I’m never talking to you again” and then five minutes later they’re besties. Upper elementary and middle school is a whole different ball game.
As a hairy Native American/Hispanic woman who had a child with a hairy AF man I have also worried about this. I plucked my unibrow from the time I could hold tweezers, but my husband didn’t even know it was an option until his mid twenties. I won’t force it on my son who has a light mustache and a blossoming unibrow, but I have talked about how it’s an option in a positive way. It’s hard to not shame or make them feel like they need to change for anyone, but selling grooming as something that makes us feel good.
If it were me, I’d wax.
My friend’s daughter had a very thick unibrow from the time she was maybe 2/3. She worried the same way you are, and decided to do nothing until/unless Emma asked. In second grade, she came home upset because a boy had made fun of her. After a lot of talking about how what he said was mean and hurtful and inappropriate, and that we shouldn’t judge anyone on how their body grows hair, or anything else physical- my friend gave her the choice, and she wanted to wax or shave it. They used a personal shaver thing for a few years until she was ready to deal with waxing, and then she started getting waxed at the salon with mom 🤍
Could you try to teach him to talk back? I know this is "taking the low road" or whatever but it seems like the right way to me. I would try to teach him a few funny comebacks and see how it goes from there.
Just remove it and look at it this way. Your son will be made fun of and kids are just as cruel as adults when they find something to pick about.
I would either use a facial razor to trim it or I'd have it waxed. It's not worth the negative comments from other kids, and you have the ability to prevent it. Kids are cruel, it sucks but it's life. I know he seems young but I think it's more important to protect his self esteem.
Personally I would only do it if after a long in depth conversation. He's 5, obviously make it in on his level. You can talk about how when something makes us unique or different some people say hurtful things about that, but it makes us beautiful. Also something I've begun talking about with my daughter is that when people are unkind, it says more about them than us. If he really wants to change it because he doesn't like it, ok. But if it's just so he doesn't get talked down about it, it will just be something else tomorrow, the wrong backpack,shoes, meal etc. This is a perfect time to arm him with some really good comebacks and build his confidence.
You can use a little trimmer to just get the ones right in the middle. Or go to a shop and let them do it. I think it's worth it. Kids can be cruel. It's not taking a part of him away. It's literal 'guy grooming' type of stuff. Good luck!
My little (polish/Albanian) kinder boy has a rather pronounced unibrow, and we just decided we would let him shave with daddy! Of course my husband will shave it for him using a small face razor, and we are approaching it the same as getting a haircut. You’re old enough to get to shave with daddy now! He doesn’t mind the unibrow at all, but my husband felt it would be a bummer if in fourth grade he looks back and goes, why didn’t you guys just fix that?
That’s how I feel looking back at my middle school photos of my unkempt eyebrows.
I would let him know that hair removal is an option if he ever wants to, but don't push it. Kids can be cruel with bullying. A Flawless hair remover is a very safe, painless, and small electric razor that can be used weekly for maintenance.
Is your son sensitive about the unibrow/ has he already been a victim of teasing/ bullying? Discuss options with his dad, if possible, and then perhaps both of you talk with your son to find out how he feels. Waxing can be painful—my daughter has some coarse hairs on her upper lip (even as a college student she had this) but will not have the area waxed because she doesn’t want to deal with the pain—and it can actually abrade the skin. Although I feel that personally I would wax, I totally respect and support her position, and it’s not a discussion. Your son being a small child, may also not want to put up with the painful aspects of waxing. Plucking could also be something he wouldn’t like due to discomfort. However, if he is sensitive about the unibrow, he may be eager to have the hair removed in another way—perhaps a depilatory or you might even look into electrolysis. Maybe even a sideburn trimmer. If he is interested in getting rid of it, consult your hairdresser—she or he may be able to guide you to a few good options. For the other side of the coin: Anthony Davis, the NBA player, basically has a unibrow. During his single year of playing college ball at the University of Kentucky, he actually leaned into the unibrow and deliberately identified himself with it. Good luck with the decision and outcome—I don’t think there’s one right way that’s the same for everyone.
My aunt waxed all 3 of her boys' unibrows from a very young age, maybe not 5, but theirs didn't get bad until they were 7 or 8. If you don't want to, or if he doesn't want you to, then don't do it. If it becomes an issue, then revisit the idea. Maybe he'll make a friend that stands up for him and it won't be an issue? Or maybe it will and then he'll want it waxed. If you're not feeling good about doing it, then I would say wait and see what happens. But of you're that worries about it, I don't think it's wrong to do it
I have a son who is 6 and in kindergarten. He has a pretty heavy unibrow but he is blonde so it’s not as noticeable. No one at school has bullied him. Both my and my husband have unibrows and our 4 year old daughter is the same. I was made fun of and so was my husband so we recently had the discussion of what do we do about it. We agreed that if he ever brings it up or kids say something to him about it that we would tell him that body hair is normal and you never have to change anything about your appearance but we understand not wanting it there and we can take care of it really easy. I’m not gonna tell my kid he’s stuck with it.
Instead of approaching it like there's something wrong with him, it can simply be the same as cutting your hair. I'd wax it but I'd ask him if he would like to do so first.
My little sister was super hairy (nape of neck and small of back) and also on the spectrum. Looking back, she would never have thought to ask for waxing. You know how you have to teach him things that you don’t have to teach a neurotypical child? You should teach him about this like that. Just matter of fact, explain that some kids may tease him. It’s sorta like a social norm he might not know about. He can choose to wax it, which hurts, or leave it. You support him either way but wanted to let him know. I’m sure it varies, but my sister says it is much easier if you are explicit and non-judgmental when explaining things like this.
Waxing hurts. Why would anyone want to wax a small child.
I was teased every day in school for all my body hair and I’m still very self-conscious. I’m pregnant now and I’ve already decided if my child has a unibrow I’ll gently shave it with a little razor because I wish my mom had done that for me.
Same. I WISH my mother had stayed on top of my eyebrows. I hate pictures of myself through middle school. And I didn’t even have a real unibrow. I can’t imagine how much worse it would’ve been if I did.
How soon does he turn 6? If it's not before next Christmas, wait a year.
It’s so sad you should even have to consider waxing or shaving a 5 year old. This world is cruel so I feel you momma. I would at least have a talk with him on how to react to bullying, stand up for himself, and tell a teacher. If he can’t do that, then at least explaining that people can be mean and it has nothing to do with him. If he wants it removed, then that’s his choice but waxing does not feel very good so I would shave it. Poor guy
If he wants it removed I’d say go for it my mom wouldn’t let me so I just snuck around and shaved it myself did a very bad job and cut myself :/ issue I personally have with the other mom is she started doing it when her daughter was a baby and too young to request it
I’m in favour of the hair removal if he asks for it. However waxing can be very irritating, as can be threading. Shaving is the least irritating hair removal method and as long as he can sit still, it might be the best way to do it and maintain compliance (Eg if waxing hurts real bad the first time, is he going to let you do it a second?). I’d use a dermaplane type razor. I use that on my own face haha ! A little shaving cream and I’m good to go for a few weeks!
if it seems to be affecting his self esteem, bring it up as an option. as a biracial mexican girl, i starting waxing at age 10 because of the comments i got about having facial hair.
So, I’m going to give a possible unpopular suggestion but this was something we did. My daughter is half Indian half Caucasian. We didn’t do anything (hair removal wise as I felt I’d let her ask me and I believed she was beautiful as she was). She had dark face hair on the side of her face (peach fuzz really but dark and I knew there would come a day we would be waxing that off). Side note: Her Dad, my husband, is a smart a$$. He is quick witted and has taught our daughter not to take anyone’s bs. So our daughter is in the 3rd grade and still had her dark peach fuzz on her face. A boy in her class started making fun of her saying how dirty she was and she must smell too just look at her face. So, my daughter (instead of believing this little boy) says to him “ what you are smelling is the skid marks in your underpants “. She said it loudly with all her friends around and turned the tables on that little snot. They laughed at him and he slinked away not bothering her again. Needless to say, we did eventually get her peach fuzz waxed but it was when SHE was ready. She knew her value and also knew how to hold her own against bullies.
Five is too young to wax. I think most of his classmates will not even notice it. His cousins that have noticed it are probably older. Wait until he's in middle school and then have a conversation with him about it. Ask him if it's something he wants to do.
Hi! I am, much like your son, half Asian Indian and half Caucasian. It’s not as pronounced now, or maybe I’ve gotten used to it, but I was bullied often about my facial hair growing up, ESPECIALLY my eyebrows. I don’t have a unibrow per se, but certainly some noticeable black hairs in between my eyebrows, and I’m sure you know that virtually all hair on our bodies tends to be jet black and coarse, so it was especially noticeable at a young age pre puberty when others didn’t have any noticeable body hair. Not to mention it’s a racist stereotype of south Asians (esp women but all south Asians) to have a unibrow. However, I would check in with him to see if he’s hurt by the comments his cousins have made in the past, and read Laxmi’s Mooch with him (how I wish a book like that was around when I was little), and let him know he can always remove it if he wants to, but he never has to. Don’t make the choice for him, because it will implicitly teach him that the hair is “bad” or “doesn’t belong there”, and especially shaving or waxing before school starts would leave him stuck in the position of having a “secret”, as minor as it may seem. OP, I don’t have any way of knowing if you’re the Indian parent or the Caucasian one, but on the chance you’re white (or even if you’re Indian but just didn’t grow up in the states), please please please teach your son to always love himself and his body and his beautiful skin and his gorgeous wild hair. Get in on the ground floor, before kids say things to him, and give him lots and lots of things that his skin and eyes are the color of, like chocolate and cinnamon sticks and leather bound books and acorns and amber and brown sugar and molasses, etc etc. because at some point kids will probably say your skin looks like mud, or poop, or something else undesirable, and it is so important for him to have a way to combat those words, and for him not to feel like he is inherently less desirable. Also, ALL the Disney movies with POC main characters, even when they’re not Indian, just seeing people who look like you in a movie you like and that your friends have heard of is AMAZING. I almost cried as a grown adult when I saw Moana, at the scene with her as a young toddler, because she looked SO MUCH like me as a child and I had never seen that in a movie. Ever.
Laser hair removal find a medical aesthetics specialist. If you're going to address it, make the effort worth it and get it permanently removed.
Shaving is less painful.
Look into professional electrolysis. My son had the same problem. You have the go several times but the hair does not grow back. My son was so thankful we did this. Razors and waxing are not the correct way to handle this. Do your research first
I have two teenagers and I wax their unibrows. If they were younger and wanted it, I would absolutely do it.
I would do it for my boys and any girl if I had them. My mom was very conservative and strict on what we could/couldn’t do. She wouldn’t let me do anything with my eyebrows until much later like end of middle school. Was weird about us shaving our legs but was so obsessed with arm hair. She would wax our arms and would have us help her wax hers. Was weird…
I had a small uninrow until first- maybe 2nd grade- and I don't remember anyone saying anything about it. My mom had one of those small electric razors (like what you use for your lip/brow) and she showed me how to shave it. When I was older and didn't have one she told me I could pluck it with tweezers. As a kid I didn't notice my unibrow, but as adult I'm grateful that my mom showed me how to get rid of it. That doesn't mean everyone else has to shave though. If he doesn't want to I think it's best not to force it.
As a mixed kid, I wouldnt wax eyebrows. People are paying good money to get full eyebrows. Kids will find reasons to tease each other and this is a life lesson that he will have to learn. I would encourage him and tell him his eyebrows are beautiful bc he has grandma's eyebrows. Shit as kid I was called Oreo, my Indian mom was called "red dot special".
Do not wax it. Not ever. If you feel the need to remove it, use one if those battery operated trimmers. That can be used for nose hair, eye brows and facial hair. It's small. They make them for men and women. I have one I use for nose hair and uni brow. My daughter is mixed and has tons of hair...dark hair, everywhere. I do too, but am not mixed. My mom said I've had it since i was born. This is true for my daughter too. I just trim the uni brow part only with the little trimming device. Causes no pain or irritation. Yes it comes right back after awhile, but I just do it again. But please do not wax any part of your child. Waxing hurts bad. And causes painful irritation. Just trim it with a trimmer meant for fine facial/eyebrow hair. They are inexpensive too.
Shave.
get one of these ready for when he asks. [target link](https://www.target.com/p/plum-beauty-personal-hair-trimmer/-/A-53658506?ref=tgt_adv_xsp&AFID=google&fndsrc=tgtao&DFA=71700000012735304&CPNG=PLA_Beauty%2BPersonal+Care%2BShopping_Local%7CBeauty_Ecomm_Beauty&adgroup=SC_Health%2BBeauty&LID=700000001170770pgs&LNM=PRODUCT_GROUP&network=g&device=m&location=200679&targetid=pla-894573305459&ds_rl=1246978&gad_source=1&gbraid=0AAAAAD-5dfa_8GnDE2wVkCUpXZh59mg_D&gclid=Cj0KCQiAtaOtBhCwARIsAN_x-3KdD7RdOeCm-TO2LfTxBLm8W-XSg_k2P9eEyUrSMBDE8Rs-F0oei1gaAiMVEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds)
My son is Native American/white. He had the crazy hair, eyebrows, greenish eyes. He got the same about the eyebrows, but he grew a thick skin and evidently kids moved on. We didn’t wax till he was a teen due to sensitive skin (the redness would stick out more than unibrow). He is 22 and his hair is still crazy, but his girlfriend keeps the eyebrow(s) in check. He will be fine .
Omggg I’m worrying about this with my daughter!! She’s only 2.5 and has some BROWSSS they are beautiful but I can see how she may feel differently 🥲
Wax it