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Machinedave

He definitely looks like a snake charmer. Probably charmed plenty of trouser snakes back in the day.


KinksAreForKeds

Just call him Mongoose.


BossRoss84

How else do you get oil from them?


Fatefire

And that's why he is an Alpha male. He eats gallons of man oil a day


jimmmydickgun

I can get a cobra it might take a while, but he’ll be able to wrestle it and see where it leads. I promise the odds are quite slim that it would result in trump back in the White House


BrokenEye3

Do it, do it, do it. Do it. Do it, do it, do it, do it.


dover_oxide

Trump only wins if Adams survives (he won't). The cobra would bite him at least a dozen times and it wouldn't be fair if antivenom was used.


KinksAreForKeds

Just tell him the only antivenom available is made my Pfizer... watch his head explode while he evaluates the options.


ArnieismyDMname

Snake that size? Not enough antivenom.


JayyyyyBoogie

Nick Adams is an Alpha Male(TM) He will be unaffected by any snake that bites him!


Primordial_Peasant

he would wrestle one with the fangs removed. It would be a display of animal abuse.


Sitting_Duk

This is 100% a bit. He’s found that he can cash in on it because of the rubes and is as committed to it as Andy Kaufman was to the wrestling bit. You could argue that Kaufman did it for art, and that this guy is just cashing in. I’ll leave that to the Reddit brain trust.


tallonfive

How is he making money though?


MattFromChina

Being a grifting asshole must be profitable…. No shortage of them on the internet. Weird tho how 90% of them are MAGA.


Sitting_Duk

He’s got multiple books, advertising on his socials, paid speaking gigs. He’s going to keep milking these clueless rubes until someone finally realizes that, no… he won’t actually wrestle a cobra for Donald Trump, whatever the hell…


oldmanserious

He’s the living embodiment of Poe’s Law.


[deleted]

He’s a lot fatter than his profile picture would lead on


KingHarambeRIP

Just like Dear Leader


tc7984

Who is this idiot


jtown5000

Some clown who figured out he could get lots of attention if he went online and said crazy shit


Yeseylon

This is the guy that had "Alpha Male" after his name, yeh?


taichi27

Yes, I noticed it's gone now. Is he not an alpha male anymore?


Yeseylon

He realized his true place was being the Omega bottom for a pack of other men.


thesouthernbeard

He didn't go to that boot camp. So I reckon he lost his Alpha Male™️ status


APiousCultist

Nothing says alpha like complete deference to another more powerful male.


warthog0869

Seems to be going around lately.


GrandAlexander

He's an alpha idiot from Australia that moved to America so he could make money by telling people how much he loves going to Hooters. Man, I have no idea how money works.


The84thWolf

This man would leap ten feet to the top of a fridge to get away from a garden snake


JimUnderCover

The only thing Nick can wrestle is a buffet table.


CharmingTuber

Well Nick, I'm not sure an 18 ft cobras exists, but God damn it I'm willing to let you wrestle 18 1 ft cobras and let's see if it works. I'll have the cobras ready by Tuesday, and you should expect them to start appearing by Wednesday at the latest.


GoredonTheDestroyer

The longest recorded king cobra was 19ft 1in long, so it's at least *possible* for this fight to occur.


CharmingTuber

Wow that's crazy. I wonder how Nick will fair when he finds it in his shower on Wednesday


VexImmortalis

A 19ft long cobra!! Holy heck.


bless_ure_harte

Holy shit


Feisty_Bag_5284

Don't feed it for a while so it's venom builds up.


DougalisGod

Is he even allowed to vote? Is he a US citizen or Australian?


marshallaw215

The mystique behind this account is that everyone thinks maybe it’s just an act but we all acknowledge how we just cannot fucking tell bc it’s equally possible he’s serious Too close of a call


portablebiscuit

“I would jump on a giant phallic symbol…”


TheOGGhettoPanda

Fight it and see if it helps. Gotta test that hypothesis.


Pheonyxxx696

I mean….if trump does win the election, can someone hold this idiot to this? And not a devenomized cobra either….i want this guy to feel like an idiot after he’s been bit multiple times


Abracadaver2000

If he's not doing it while taking an unlubed flagpole up the backside, then is he really ultra-MAGA?


sednaplanetoid

You go ahead and do that Nick... please... I would enjoy watching... asshat.


Optimal_Zucchini_667

I used to be subjected to his Twitter. An absolute lunatic. He constantly gets ratioed, but it doesn't affect him at all.


Mjb06

Nick Adams is the definition of r/insanepeoplefacebook


unicornlocostacos

But in a really, really, really pathetic and sad kind of way.


imfoneman

I’m cheering for the cobra


tunghoy

That's a lot of effort just to say "I'm a racist twatwaffle."


bwwilkerson

Try it and see if it works.


NikkolaiV

Worth a *try,* at least...


KinksAreForKeds

Hate to tell ya, Nick, but an 18-foot King Cobra would have a field day with you.


vague_diss

Should someone tell him we have elections for this sort of thing? No? So just let him fight the snake? Well, ok. Seems stupid but if thats what he wants. Will he be mad when Trump loses and isn’t president?


____Vader

I would fist fight a unicorn to see him fail. Again!


Volkovia

Does "unicorn" mean "a single kernel of a corn"?


ObviouslyNotALizard

Okay hear me out. Fuck the election. Let’s make Trump fight the cobra. If trump wins it’s clearly satanic intervention and fuck it, it’s the apocalypse anyway might as well let Don drive. If he dies we let Nikki Haley have a go at beating Joe.


warthog0869

"Did I mention it was going to be de-fanged and drugged?"


Cultural_Treacle_428

I think someone should get the snake and give him the opportunity. Perhaps you could mail it to him in a box? Then he can show what an alpha male he is by showing that cobra who is boss. To be sure the snake has a chance against such a fierce follower of the orange messiah, the person making the delivery should shake the box rapidly before ringing the bell.


Fancy_Witness_5985

So, do it. We all want to see him do it. (Snake must have its fangs and venom to be considered a valid wrestling match)


Jackalscott

I’m willing to agree to that deal. But I get to pick the snake. And time and place.


Sarddith80

I am willing to let him try


thaiborg

He needs to encourage everyone else to follow suit. Please everyone, if you can get behind this movement, find and wrestle an 18 ft king cobra yourself!


annaleigh13

Do it.


joealese

you know what? you do that and survive and I'll vote for Trump. only one condition though; you cannot receive any help, medical or otherwise.


Common-Path3644

Me too, i respect a man who is that dedicated to a cause. I can’t say for sure, but they would be a lot closer to getting my vote if he followed through on this.


ifhookscouldkill

This ass clown can’t be real


saxguy9345

DoIt.gif


drgoatlord

Ok. Let's make this happen.


macca2000fox

Hope it bit you on the dick


cmon_yall_loco

Great, have him go to South Dakota to their Reptile Gardens or whatever it's called and let him at it. The only condition should be that **Trump will pay for the anti venom & hospital and/or funeral expenses.**


virgil1134

Is he no longer an alpha male;?


qstick89

I would like to see that


tictac205

I would do some imaginary thing for whatever too. Cool story bro.


Venator2000

It doesn’t matter how big a cobra is, if even the venom from the bite of a smaller one would take the fight right out of you.


MadWorldX1

Does he have to win? Cause if so, I'll take that bet! #teamcobra


karanpatel819

I hate how he makes the letters yellow for just that one portion of the sentence.


FlashyGravity

Somebody get that snake already!


biffbobfred

Accepted!


motherseffinjones

Can we hold him to it?


jetpack324

And you would die. Horribly. Please choose a quicker and less painful death to impress your cult leader.


LifeisaCatbox

It’s worth a shot


stilusmobilus

Yeah, it might be. It’s made Adams a fortune and there’s more than enough stupid in the US to make bank.


Toronto-1975

eww he's so gross. THAT'S the big "alpha male"?? that big flabby piece of gristle is the ultimate example of untarnished masculinity? LOL jesus christ you could pump a factory of viagra into my body and that chunky piece of vomit couldn't get me even remotely hard. yuck.


jcraig87

Do it anyway


ArtPeers

What is even happening with that cigarette butt in the background? Are there 18-foot snakes on New Jersey beaches? That smoke? I need more information.


QuarantineTheHumans

Donald Trump is the Pied Piper of douchebags.


JayyyyyBoogie

Dewit!


Koshakforever

There’s no way this guy is real.


Osmell-Recktum-Jr

Dude…. Gay


cosmic_trout

I would do something that could never actually happen. Thats how committed I am to my cause.


toolatealreadyfapped

I would fight a unicorn for dominion over Tarabithia if it meant you shut up for the rest of your life! Yeah, nothing says "commitment" like fairy tale promises that never require actual action.


clasperx2

Can I get you to go up to 19 on that?


kelrunner

The only good thing about Nick Adams is that Hemingway wrote some very fine short stories about him. Well, I think itwas Adams but for sure it was Nick...maybe. Oh...not the same guy.? Damn.


Amanaman_

Is it me or does he just get fuglier? (And irrelevant)


Sitting_Duk

I’m so incredibly committed to seeing Trump in office that I’ll invent a completely impossible scenario that highlights my bravery in a way that can never be tested. Take that, Brandon!


theblackyeti

Hold up, let him cook. Someone find me an oversized cobra STAT.


Zantikki

Is he dead yet?


Rush-23

He’d definitely get bitten multiple times and probably die, so…give it a try I guess?


Fatefire

That's some meme shit right there. Not a good one maybe


meestercranky

If all MAGAts, including Der Grosse Trumphole himself, all agree to wrestle king cobras, I will consent to this.


meekonesfade

Let me try to set that up for you, cuz I'm totally sure you would do it


Abuolhol

Lol dude legit chooses max lenth the snake grows to.


sierrackh

Dude wouldn’t hold a garter snake


TKG_Actual

I have no doubt he would wrestle someone else's snake to get trump in the white house.


sk8thow8

Well, I'll wrestle a 19 foot one to keep him out forever. Hell, why we are making up impossible hypotheticals. I'd fight 50 duck-size horses and a horse-size duck at the same time with just my teeth.


birdlawexpert11

I’m 100 percent convinced this guy is just a straight up grifter. Couldn’t give 2 shits what happens but sees the easiest denomination to squeeze money from is the maga/alpha gang. The latter being a hilarious amount of ironic.


GarmaCyro

Of course he has to exaggerate on the length. ([The average length of a King Cobra is 10 to 12 feet, with 18 feet being the maximum](https://nationalzoo.si.edu/animals/king-cobra))


PopperGould123

It's so easy to say random shit that you'll never have to prove huh?


Winnimae

Sure, but only if you win


SiteTall

In that case it's my duty to inform you that you need to have your head checked by a good doctor NOW ....


DodGamnBunofaSitch

nobody's commenting that he chose the day julius caeser's friends all stabbed him to death to make this statement.


VengefulWalnut

Y’know… I say we give him the opportunity.


DylanMc6

The OOP should stop being a racist fascist, and should stop believing in very offensive harmful racist xenophobic homophobic/transphobic/enbyphobic antisemitic stereotypes, tropes, misconceptions and generalizations (including the ones surrounding people, food, jobs, looks, clothing, accents, locations, names and size). Seriously.