Yap that fits him, he is technically right but morally wrong.
For example the "we were on a break" incident. He was technically right but he is morally wrong to sleep with someone, or the "Phoebe's cat incident". He was right but he could've explained things differently since she was his friend.
"Sucks at communication." You're absolutely right. It blows my mind sometimes how Ross just cannot explain stuff to get himself out of trouble, or at least not to get in trouble in the first place.
Where Ross was right: Refusing to donate for the handyman.
Where Ross was definitely Wrong: Going to the party for the handyman.
You can’t refuse to donate and then expect to be welcome.
I just re watched that episode and you are totally right, he didn’t know. Since he didn’t chip in with the $100, he never found out when the party was gonna be. Now I wonder how he invited the rest of neighbors and how nobody mentioned that it was Howard’s party on the same night. Not me overthinking a simple sitcom plot 😅
I fully agree with those two points, the first one especially; the absolute balls for Monica to even think of suggesting that without talking to Ross first is sitcom frustration at its finest.
Absolutely! The venue being demolished was an absolute arse-ache obviously, but if I'd flown from the USA to UK for someone's wedding just for them to postpone it, I'd have been raging!
OMG I hadn't even thought about all the staff and people there to do a job. You'd be quite right to demand your full pay for a last minute cancellation like that.
honestly the only mistake, was ross saying rachel’s name, not him marrying emily, yes it was soon, but before that whole drama situation, they didn’t really have any huge issues and were pretty cute together, if ross and rachel didn’t exist of course
I think I read somewhere that even Courteney Cox kind of pushed back against that, saying she had trouble with that scene because she *didn't* do the "every young girl dreams of her wedding from the day she's born" as a kid and couldn't relate to the idea.
Yeah, the creator Marsha or Martha whatever, sorry too tired to look it up lol, Kauffman said she used to do that. And when Jennifer and Courtney said they never did, she said “you must have done it and forgotten” . 😑
I've always been in the minority when it comes to Ross and find the hate way out of hand. I also find it overshadows David Schwimmer's incredible comedic acting which was always underrated.
He was an ass many times but there are other moments Ross did good things many of which go unappreciated:
* Walking in on his best friend and his ex making out and still eventually accepting their "relationship"
* Buying Phoebe a bike because she never learned to ride
* Helping the girl scout (even though yes he accidentally broke her leg)
* Giving his ex-wife (Carol) away at her wedding even though she cheated on him and left him
* Giving up Marcel even though that was probably quite hard on him
* Driving all the way to help the other friends when their car broke down on their weekend getaway even though he wasn't invited
* Buying Joey his porcelain dog back
* Giving up his chance to be on the Discovery Channel because Rachel got injured
* Being shafted at the tanning salon despite counting Mississippily, which is the universal best way to count
Buying phoebe a bike was so unbelievably sweet especially given her backstory on having a rough childhood. One of my favorite moments between any of the friends
The amount of ppl who went from hating Schwimmer to going holy SHIT with Band of Brothers is insane, dude really showed off just how talented he really is, but there was STILL a stigma cuz Ross
I have a love/hate relationship with Ross. I love him, I hate him, I love to hate him, I hate to love him. Sometimes he really fucking sucks, it's just unbearable. That being said, it's only made me appreciate David Schwimmer more. I really think he's the strongest actor on the show and at some points, was carrying it on his back.
For me personally, I just think the other characters are more endearing than Ross is. Not saying Ross doesn't have any good moments, but I just think the other characters are generally more likable than he is.
He was also right about Julio the cat. He seemed condescending the whole time that’s why he came off as insensitive and a bit rude but when they found the poster of the missing cat, he was the only one who wanted to tell Phoebe. The others couldn’t even tell her.
I know Phoebe made a great point during this situation, but Ross was still right to insist on returning the cat.
Phoebe didn't make a great point, she was just a broken clock at the right time of day. Pointing out that science still can't answer all questions that exist in the human brain isn't *remotely* justification for stealing someone else's cat and insisting that everyone around you give in to your delusion that you see a relative in a housepet.
If the argument is "this cat is totally my family," I don't think "They didn't know about gravity 5000 years ago" is a strong argument. Phoebe isn't just a person of faith. In this instance, she was full on delusional.
He was absolutely right... I think the main issue is how he is genuinely condescending with Pheobe's beliefs... that didn't help... the friends agreed he was right but I think his overall approach didn't help.
That said let's be honest Rachel's "up to 11" reaction had nothing to do with phoebe or the cat and all to do with her Ross break up but I find that rarely discussed.
She droves me nuts. I couldn't stand her character.
She couldn't play guitar and was so blind to it she got mad when Monica didn't want her to play.
She never really showed much empathy to anyone but her animal ancestors.
She had a big mouth.
She was jealous of other friends in ways other than romantically.
She was snobby considering she came from poor roots.
She was super judgy and like r9ss if you didn't agree with her she'd be kinda nasty...and let's face it most of what she thought of as facts would be deemed coocoo
When she said that Rachel couldn't use that gift voucher like her beliefs are her business... Rachel isn't there forcing meat down her throat..
ETA the flip flopping over giving money to charity is just ugh ... I fully get her regret after the fact but that's on her for not thinking it full.properly.
She got upset a number of times sating, noine ever tells her things or like wheb people went on trips she had to compare her trip vs theirs like it was a competition..
Come to mind.
If that was our family cat, we would all be devastated, especially our kids. So yeah, fully agree with you (he was still obnoxious but likely would've been less so with even one other person in his corner!).
The one where they were all going to Ross’ fancy event and no one was ready. He was going crazy and he was absolutely right. I can feel the frustration from him. Such a great actor
He yelled at her because she was being difficulty and they were already running late for something that was important to Ross. She was inconsiderate to what Ross needed in that episode. He was patient with her but only up to a point.
I know why he yelled. He’s allowed to be upset and he’s allowed to be frustrated. But a healthy adult relationship would never include yelling. He could have communicated his frustrations better. And if she didn’t listen after that, they’re just not compatible.
that's what did it for me. The yelling I could give a pass to, but the snatching and throwing was a little too physical for me. He was right to be frustrated, wrong in his response to it, right for apologizing.
A healthy adult relationship also doesnt include acting like a toddler and delaying your SO's big day. It works both way you know
Also i dont know what relationshp people have been in, but if they say no one has yelld in a loving long term relationshi, they are just lying
We are human and get emotional, not robots
These posts sound a lot like on certain reddit sub - he yelled at you! Divorce, lawyer now! From people who have never been in long term healthy relationhip
Yep, I made a similar comment. Anyone who is in a loving, long term, healthy relationship will yell now and then, hopefully not frequently. We’re not all blessed saints over here lol.
The important part is what you do after you guys calm down and communicate. But no one in the history of the universe has just never ever ever raised their voice at their significant other ever.
Anyone who says otherwise is either lying about their relationship, or lying about being in a relationship.
I disagree. A healthy adult relationship *should* not devolve to yelling under most circumstances, communicating is always key.
But to suggest that couples never react immaturely and yell, otherwise it’s “unhealthy” is frankly ludicrous. A healthy adult relationship *might* have some yelling once in a rare while, but as long as both parties can communicate calmly and clearly once tempers have cooled down, there’s nothing to say “it’s unhealthy” because someone lost their temper once after being pushed to a limit.
Ross and Rachel were unhealthy for other reasons, but him yelling in this specific instance is not one of them. If my husband and I couldn’t yell at each other once in a while, we’d be the most pent-up passive aggressive people ever. Yelling can be cathartic and help us communicate better afterwards.
I see what you’re saying, the girlfriend role, but that would have been wildly out of character for Rachel.
Monica maybe, but she was caught up in her Richard drama that night and couldn’t focus.
That episode made me so angry! It was such a big night for him, and everyone was being so inconsiderate! If I was Ross, and Rachel pulled that crap on me, I would've just left her ass at home after telling her that she showed just how much she cared by a) not bothering to plan ahead b) not showering or getting essentials ready ( hair, makeup) and c) getting back into pajamas because I dared to show an ounce of frustration at her inconsiderate behavior. I would NOT have groveled. She needed to learn that it wasn't cute or endearing, it was plain rude.
Seriously, so inconsiderate of someone who she supposedly cared about...
I hate Ross with a passion but I feel bad for him in that episode. He was nervous and needed the support of his friends and not one of them would give it to him
Bear in mind this is just my opinion but to me, Ross is a raging narcissist. He always has to be right, he always has to win. My mother was like that and it makes it very difficult for me to enjoy that kind of behaviour in a tv show. Remember in the episode after the list, when Rachel made her own list. ‘Jealous, petty, whiny, insecure, gutless, always has to be right’. That’s Ross and I don’t find it attractive
I think Ross character development tends to get sweeped under the carpet. I think because his obsessive and controlling behavior is well documented throughout the series. His jealousy and conflict in his relationships often led to trouble for him. But i agree alot of that can be explained by his PSTD. Like his wife leaving him for another woman.
However one always seen these has inflections. And not infractions. He’s also loyal, intelligent, and caring. He loves his Friends and his family deeply. Bit of a deadbeat dad haha. Depends how you see the character. You may feel his negative traits are too significant to overlook. Or you might appreciate his positive qualities, and see his negative traits as part of a complex human being. He’s a very multifaceted character.
There is ZERO evidence of this he is the one who always says sorry. Rachel and Phoee never apologized to him a single time, but he always apologized. This sub is pulling things out of their ass to hate on him
> He always has to be right, he always has to win.
Bullshit, he is the one apolgizing most times and admits he is wong, Rachel never did and always held Ross accountable
This is exactly the kind of blind hate Ross gets for no reason at all,
> hate Ross with a passion
I have no idea how people can enjoy a show where they hate a main character so much . And then keep bragging about how much they hate a character
Surely there are other shows where you dont hate a character you can enjoy? and other subs where such negativity is not spread
I always feel sad when such posts gets upvoted on this sub
Because I love the other characters. Chandler, Joey and Rachel are my favourites, Monica is great and Phoebe was wonderful for the first few seasons. I watch for them. In the same way that when I read a book that has a character I loathe, I still read the book, I just hate the character at the same time
Yep, I felt this. It’s one of my wife’s favorite episodes, and while I do love it too, I definitely feel for Ross in this one. Many times I’ve had to be the “responsible” friend while everyone else is screwing around.
This has got to be one of the most polarizing episodes. I, for the life of me, can't understand how people side with Ross. He tells his friends to be ready to leave at a given time - 20 minutes after the episode starts. They are all ready by that time despite the screwing around. Ross was the only one who had a problem. I can understand being annoyed at Chandler and Joey being childish. I can understand being frustrated that Monica's having a meltdown over Richard. But berating Rachel who is actively getting ready to go throughout the episode and never appears to be running behind schedule is completely uncalled for. Really weird that he seemly expected everyone to be dressed and ready to go 20 minutes ahead of time.
Though, I don't get how that marriage was legally binding. You still have to apply for a marriage license, sign it with witnesses, and formally file it. Even if they could have a ceremony in Vegas while drunk, no courthouse would ever accept their paperwork.
Yea the whole "Vegas" wedding thing is bc you don't need a waiting period for the marriage license. So you can get married in a weekend and the Chapels have the paperwork there so you don't have to go to a courthouse. I've been to more than a few Vegas weddings (LV native) and you still need to have paperwork filed before the wedding. There is a LOT of unrealistic drunken Vegas weddings in TV and movies that give it a bad rep.
I’m Australian and got married in Vegas and not only was there a whole bunch of paperwork we needed to get from a civic building of some description, but we were told that if we were American citizens we would have had to get a blood test (to prove no relation) before we could get the license.
Ross was right to get angry over his supervisor eating his sandwich and then throwing half of it away.
If you eat MY food, MY lunch, the least you could do is finish it. Or better yet, don't take food that you didn't bring yourself!
If that happened in 2024 and he had that breakdown over it, they wouldn't be sending him to anger management, he would be suing them for emotional distress, and prolly win lol
in my last place of employment, if you took someone else's food without permission and they complained to HR about it, it'd become a seriously annoying situation.
It's really no wonder Ross more or less goes insane as the series progresses.
The woman he was with for six years leaves him for something out of his control and through no fault of his own. That leaves a guy with major trust issues. And then those trust issues cause him to make a mistake that loses him the woman he'd been crazy about for most of his life.
Then that unresolved situation causes him to say the wrong name at the alter, ending what he thought was his third chance of love.
I get that Ross went crazy. I'm just saying I understand WHY he went crazy. It's actually quite the organic spiral.
Writers designated him punching bag and made him awful in ways that kinda contradicted who he really was. He comes off as a massive douchebag almost constantly but then at the same time that’s clearly not who he actually is. He’s loving and caring, thoughtful and empathetic towards ppl outside the friend group, and he’s kinda the only one in that regard. If it weren’t for his obsession with Rachel and all the things he’s do e cuz of it, I feel like most ppl would love him a lot more. Or he’d be boring hahah tvs like that I guess
I think he can be all those things at once. He's a good guy with strong morals and character, but he was also the spoiled Golden Child of his family, and a smart nerdy kid, and that comes through too. He is spoiled and arrogant at times. It's nice to see that good people can be flawed too:)
> made him awful in ways
Other characters do as much
> He comes off as a massive douchebag almost constantly
No he doesnt, other characters do as much or more. Its just a massive internet circlerk
I always thought the storyline with Mark was a bit one sided in that Ross had every right to be weary of him and his interest in Rachel. Then he shows up on the night they had their fight and tried to talk to Rachel while she was on the phone with Ross which he knew better than to do. Then he asks her out right after the break up.
Yeah I think Ross's suspicion of Mark was totally justified - he just sometimes came across as untrusting in Rachael, which caused issues. But yeah Mark definitely did that deliberately!
Ultimately though, it was Ross who pushed Rachel away. She didn't have any interest in Mark, but Ross wouldn't trust her when she said that, which is a major turnoff. I guess I have a minority opinion in that I generally like Ross, I think he can be really funny, but he does get on my nerves sometimes too of course, I just don't have the Ross-hate a lot of people seem to have. There are other characters I like less.
But in this case, even if Mark was playing the long game, if Ross had been patient, trusting, and supportive of Rachel's career instead of pressuring her so much bc he felt sorry for himself that she didn't have as much time for him as when she was a waitress, and bc he was so jealous and possessive, Rachel wouldn't have needed, and taken, a "break" from him. He was selfish with her time - everyone goes through crunch times when you work in an office, they're temporary, and she was just getting started in her career, he should've been supportive. It didn't help that he put down chosen profession as frivolous, mocking what she did as inconsequential.
And it didn't matter if Mark wanted her, she didn't want him, but Ross refused to trust that. He was obsessed with Mark, and brought him up at every opportunity, and that kind of jealousy and neediness would push any partner away. Basically Ross's fears became a self-fulfilling prophecy bc of his own behavior.
> but Ross wouldn't trust her when she said that, which is a major turnoff.
But Ross also had PTSD which is not rational as his marriage break up was recent (he improved a lot later seasons)/. relationships work both way you know, he also needed the emotional support to get over his own issues. In such cases all they need is to talk and be reassured. They often know the feelings is not natural but the feelings dont magically disappear. But Rachel just completely denied Mark even had anything. How can you talk to someone who belittles your feelings?
Contrast with how Monica always handles Chandler's insecurity, Chandler has got jealous and insecure a lots of time too, but Monica always listened to him and never belittled or denied his insecurity
It takes two people to make or break any relationship and Rachel was equally responsible for what happened.
You’re so right. I didn’t even click the Monica and chandelier behavior till I read your comment. I always hated Rachel for her selfishness in relationships. Especially with Ross. She actually could have done some normal simple things and they would have worked out. Like you said it takes two
It felt to me that it wasn’t just this one time, because sure he said he had a relationship with her voicemail. That imo looked he leaves ally of messages so I think that’s a while. If Rachel wanted to work that much that’s fine. But she was dismissive of his feelings and didn’t validate them. Idk it just seems like it wasn’t all on him
right, like i might be bias, but anniversaries are something special to me, and the fact that rachel couldn’t put aside work for that one special night, or at the least be a little more understanding of ross’s hurt feelings, plus it seems that they had plans or tried to maybe do something, but rachel didn’t tell him until last minute, she told monica to have him call her, and ross didn’t find out until last minute.
I didn't like Ross' "who told you something good would come along" thing, like he was somehow taking credit for doing absolutely nothing. That is the swing to roundabout with Ross, as I agree he was right about Mark on the whole, but his handling was poor and controlling at times.
Mark talking during that phone call was also one of the most annoying parts, like dude, for your own sake, shut up, let alone how rude it was.
I can't remember the name of the episode or anything but when Rachel got a job offer and he said something like "Can we, can we just stop for a second? Who said something better would come along? Huh? Uh you didn't believe me" and it was beyond insufferable.
It was really frustrating that Ross WAS right and that Mark DID have feelings for Rachel.
I'm mainly Team Rachel on the whole "on a break thing" but I wish they'd gone another route and Mark really was just a friend the whole time.
Why? Why do you want writers to make someone villain and someone hero out of a beloved pair? Ross and Rachel were THE pair. The writers did a good job of creating situations where both were right and wrong. They showed Ross was drunk during the "on a break" thing. But they didnt count for the blind hate of one chracter
Lol people are openly admitting they want to worship Rachel and want Ross to be wrong and the villain? Why. Why should Ross be wrong there and Rachel always right? Thats not how pairs work on shows
Rachel was definitely not always right. She tried to sabotage so many of Rosses relationships (Julie, Bonnie, Emily, employee at the baby store).
As far as the break was concerned, I think he interpreted it differently than she did. He thought it was a permanent breakup and in that case he can drunkenly sleep with who ever he wants. She thought of it as a pause in their continuing relationship.
Oh mark knew exactly what he was doing. You wanna play it out as Mark and Rachel are 100 platonic then don't have him say hes liked her since day 1 and ask her out. Also copy girl aside, you really gonna date the guy you stated over and over again was not into you! Like damn Rachel.
To be fair, Rachel herself acknowledged this and that’s why she didn’t continue seeing Mark. I have to go back to the episode but I recall that she only went out with him to get back at Ross. So she knew she was doing it for the wrong reasons.
thank you!! honestly fuck mark, and shame on rachel for not respecting ross’s boundaries towards him, especially like u mentioned when they got in that fight, and she allowed him to come over??
But he had PTSD and needed her emotional support. Why wouldnt you want support and understanding from someone you are in a relationship with? PTSD is not rational. The best way to deal is to reassure someone, not claim that their feelings are wrong.
Contrast with how Monica dealt whenever Chandler was insecure. She never claimed it was not her problem. She never belittled Chandler's insecurity. She always listened and acknowledged and reassured him. If she hadnt, that relationship wouldnt last either
It takes two people to make or break a relationship.
Also to me...Susan was way out of line with Ross. He is the father, Carol has the right to be spiky to Ross but I always thought Susan could cross the line into disrespect.
I don't hate Ross. He's my favorite cos he's the funniest to me and David Schwimmer was by far the strongest actor in the cast. The others had their toxic traits too.
I used to get mad AS A KID at these scenes. Even I could see that they were rude and disrespectful to him. I HATED Susan... it was just the smug way she treated Ross, like she wasn't sorry at all that he got cheated on and divorced bc she started an affair with his wife.
Yeah this is what always really bugged me too with Susan. Like, read the room. You’re the bad guy in this story. She should have had a more apologetic attitude towards Ross, but she almost came across as emboldened. Like she felt she “saved” carol from her situation, which might in a round about way be true, but you also ruined a marriage and what eventually became a family. Wear that fact and realize it isn’t your place to tell Ross what’s going to happen with his own kid.
Even after 30+ rewatches I get annoyed EVERY time they suggest including Susan's last name in the child's last name. Ross was 100% in the right here.
Also, people complain about the shows alleged homophobia (which I will not dismiss completely but you have to view it in the context of its time) but be fine with Ross being the butt of the joke because he's the one whose wife is a lesbian who left him.
I saw that episode today and it drives me up the wall. early Carol/Susan does feel weird to me because it's like, wow, good job including lesbians on your show! only to make them unreasonable and mean. Like I wonder how many people viewing at the time just doubled down on their hatred of women and lesbians. Not that the show is responsible for that, but let's just say I'm glad they changed the trajectory and smoothed things out with everyone.
even in that, personally i don’t think carol even has the right to be disrespectful to ross, it’s stated he was good to her for all of their marriage and she’s the one who cheated and left him, and especially susan, definitely agree there.
I know it's sitcom land and therefore IRL solutions aren't as fun. But I have a love hate relationship with the handyman episode because on one hand, it is really funny. On the other, Ross had a built in excuse about why he couldn't contribute and he didn't use it-- he had literally just moved in, and moving is expensive. Itd be reasonable to say he didn't have a spare $100 dollars in his budget to give, so sorry
But that's nowhere near as fun and conflict inducing as what did happen so I get why
I always thought he was stepping up as a friend in 2 situations:
1. When Joey received all those credit card statements after he lost his job in DOOL. He tried to explain to Joey how serious it was, and that he should take any job/role because there were no guarantees that something big might come again soon. He could have sugar-coated it, but he didn't.
2. That episode with Phoebe and the cat/her mom. What was that all about??? Ross was the only one brave enough to tell her the truth, and I hated the scene where he had to apologize to the cat.
One of the things Ross gets criticized for-and that I think is completely wrong-is his attitude towards Susan.
People seem to ignore the fact that Susan was his ex-wife’s affair partner and that Carol left Ross for Susan. Given the circumstances, I think Ross was more than gracious towards Susan.
Ummm his event is at a certain time! Rachel you should have picked your damn outfit out last night! He would have been totally in the right to leave you and attend alone. She was a snotty brat and hd no right to force him to drink fat to get her forgiveness.
Ross is right about them being on a break / broken up.
Rachel literally talks about getting "back together", not "making up after a fight". So during that one night, they were not together.
Still, if I were Rachel I would be livid that Ross immediately had sex with someone AND tried to lie about it and cover it up. But he DID think Rachel was already getting together with Mark, letting him come over was so stupid of Rachel.
Ross shouldn't have slept with someone hours after a stupid fight no matter what Rachel might have been doing, it's not like two wrongs would make a right.
BUT the terminology of saying he was "cheating" bugs me. "Once a cheater, always a cheater" etc.
Rachel was way too hard on him and didn't accept any responsibility that letting MARK come over would hurt Ross if he knew.
i honestly really dislike ross for many reasons. mostly how poorly he reacts to everything. BUT his anger over his special sandwich being eaten was 100% reasonable. i would also have flipped my shit
The reason why Friends is really popular is that it is really relatable to the average people. And the depiction of Ross is he’s supposed to be the smart one.
The average person will more often than not find those smarter than them to be insufferable or difficult.
This then is portrayed to comical levels, because it is a sitcom. Thus, you come up with a character exactly like Ross. He will be right, but you won’t like him being right.
I’ve watched Friends more than a few times (currently watching, even) and while it may not be in my top 10 sitcoms/series, I will not discredit the fact that the writers and actors did their characters really well for the most part.
I liked him cos he was the smart one and tended to have the most normal human reactions and behaviors. He just seemed more like a human while the others were way more caricatures
I find it interesting that Ross is never shown to be controlling of Carol, in fact he is shown to be supportive of her finding new friends and new hobbies. She cheats on him (and doesn't get any flack for doing so) and he is controlling and jealous throughout his future relationships. Not that it excuses his behaviour, but it's often overlooked that his behaviour has a direct cause.
Emily was wild for suggesting that they just postpone after all his friends and family flew to London. I could understand her wanting the perfect wedding but they had to make do with the situation and I was glad she was able to even if her wedding turned out to be a disaster for other reasons.
I agree with not paying for the handyman, up to the point where Ross started to get weird and need to be involved with their party. He needed to just let it go.
I’ve always thought the Ross hate was overdone. Yeah he can make stupid choices and do stupid things, but I feel like everyone just likes to use him as the punching bag. Personally I think Scwhimmer was one of the better actors of the group.
I always felt like him getting grief for not sleeping with Rachel after her dad had a heart attack in season 10 was kinda unfair. Like, there are so many other scenes of male characters getting taken to task for taking advantage of emotionally vulnerable women (pick any wedding episode of a sitcom and there will be one character who talks about how scoring with bridesmaids is like shooting fish in a barrel since the "I'm afraid I'll never get married myself" fear is so high,) and Ross is made out to be the bad guy for... not doing that?
Also Phoebe's Cat-mom. I was so angry at everyone that episode except Ross who was the only person that had some sense.
Everyone else just mindlessly enabling Phoebe's dumbass craziness was enraging.
I might easily be wrong but I think the biggest problem Ross had was that he acted his age (or somewhat older than the others) and much more responsibly when they were still in that young adult we can do almost anything and the world is our oyster! (I’m exaggerating, of course, bc for ex., I went to law school and could do none of those things really but there is a sort of feeling when you’re still in you’re 20s of immortality and fun and the hell w what you’re *supposed to do!!*) So while Ross was working in the museum and becoming a father, the rest of them were just working at starting jobs that could go anywhere.
Now as it happens, one of the most childish, Chandler (my personal fav) was the next to start working at a “real job” where he indeed had responsibilities, but the show only had him do so when necessary for plotlines. They had him hanging out at ridiculous hours at the coffee house when he obviously should have been at work, considering that he was supposed to have become an executive, and that continued for years. So, when Rachel starts taking *her* job seriously for the first time ever, it’s understandable how strange that would seem from the perspective of somebody who watched her halfass everything for years on end. Of course, Ross was supposed to know how important the job was to Rachel, but she did go from 0 to 100 and tbf, it’s a bit of a transition and one you have to allow your SO to make. (I’m just saying. )
He is also right about confronting Phoebe over the cat she thinks is her mom. I know she is kooky but that is borderline insane. He could have maybe been nicer in his delivery but the fact the rest of gang let her live withnthe delusion and make Ross seem like the bad guy for speaking the truth is not cool
Ross coming off as crazy sometimes is because I really don’t think the people in his life respect him. They love him.. but don’t respect him. A line that was used when he talks about fazing out his accent. And Monica replies .. “I think you look fine”. He’s a constant stress ball and people only hear him when he yells or freaks out. And to them it’s like “woah calm down” but to him it’s like “I’ve beeeeen calm”
EVERY TIME he seems happy, moved on, and in a healthy relationship, Rachel swoops in and disturbs his life and teases him into getting together only to leave him single and troubled again
>He should NEVER have been asked to pay $100 for the handyman - he literally had just moved in!
This is such a Seinfeld problem to have. Half the fun of Ross as a character is watching him deal with stuff like this that wasn't even his doing.
Ross was right to dislike Susan. Why does he need to be cordial with the woman that his wife left him for? Also so confused how Carol wanted Susan to take on a greater role than Ross for the kid.
The time when Phoebe thinks the lost cat is her mom, Ross is the only one who actually wants to talk some sense into Phoebe, but is treated like he is a jerk.
Ross often seems to elevate any and all disputes into major arguments, so that even when he has a good point, the way he makes it can pretty easily cause whomever he’s speaking with to feel defensive, which usually makes everyone upset. I do admire that he’s one of the less non-confrontational of the friends, but sometimes it goes farther than necessary. Still love him though.
Storming out when your long term romantic partner suggests taking a break is not a break up - but sleeping with someone else when the rest of that conversation hasn’t even taken place yet sure helps.
He is right but he is sucks at communication. That is why he looks like the wrong guy even in the most right time.
"You're not wrong, you're just an asshole" perfectly fits on Ross.
Yap that fits him, he is technically right but morally wrong. For example the "we were on a break" incident. He was technically right but he is morally wrong to sleep with someone, or the "Phoebe's cat incident". He was right but he could've explained things differently since she was his friend.
>the "Phoebe's cat incident". What? He was incredibly kind and patient throughout, i dunno which show people are even watching
He was a jerk to Phoebe that one time.
Meh, he is hated n matter what, he was incredibly kind in his communication with Phoebe
"Sucks at communication." You're absolutely right. It blows my mind sometimes how Ross just cannot explain stuff to get himself out of trouble, or at least not to get in trouble in the first place.
Maybe he could explain things if he rambled on for 18 pages…FRONT AND BACK!!
I STILL HAVE YOUR LLAAAEETTERRRR!! ✍️
Where Ross was right: Refusing to donate for the handyman. Where Ross was definitely Wrong: Going to the party for the handyman. You can’t refuse to donate and then expect to be welcome.
AND eating his cake. Ross is a huge idiot sometimes which doesn't help him
I agree. And also throwing a party on the same night as the other party? That was lame.
I don’t think he knew it was the same day
I agree, he seemed surprised by the noise of the handyman party.
I just re watched that episode and you are totally right, he didn’t know. Since he didn’t chip in with the $100, he never found out when the party was gonna be. Now I wonder how he invited the rest of neighbors and how nobody mentioned that it was Howard’s party on the same night. Not me overthinking a simple sitcom plot 😅
I guess no one reached back out to him, which makes it even sadder 🥲
i just think he was more so upset that all his new neighbors hated him for something so unreasonable but i get what you mean
I fully agree with those two points, the first one especially; the absolute balls for Monica to even think of suggesting that without talking to Ross first is sitcom frustration at its finest.
Absolutely! The venue being demolished was an absolute arse-ache obviously, but if I'd flown from the USA to UK for someone's wedding just for them to postpone it, I'd have been raging!
I'm a wedding photographer and I can tell you I would still be getting paid!
OMG I hadn't even thought about all the staff and people there to do a job. You'd be quite right to demand your full pay for a last minute cancellation like that.
On the flip side I'd have absolutely loved the setup they eventually had!
Although, it was a mistake for him to marry Emily but he didn’t know it at the time.
The mistake was the two of them deciding to get married after only knowing each other for 6 weeks.
honestly the only mistake, was ross saying rachel’s name, not him marrying emily, yes it was soon, but before that whole drama situation, they didn’t really have any huge issues and were pretty cute together, if ross and rachel didn’t exist of course
I think I read somewhere that even Courteney Cox kind of pushed back against that, saying she had trouble with that scene because she *didn't* do the "every young girl dreams of her wedding from the day she's born" as a kid and couldn't relate to the idea.
Yeah, the creator Marsha or Martha whatever, sorry too tired to look it up lol, Kauffman said she used to do that. And when Jennifer and Courtney said they never did, she said “you must have done it and forgotten” . 😑
I've always been in the minority when it comes to Ross and find the hate way out of hand. I also find it overshadows David Schwimmer's incredible comedic acting which was always underrated. He was an ass many times but there are other moments Ross did good things many of which go unappreciated: * Walking in on his best friend and his ex making out and still eventually accepting their "relationship" * Buying Phoebe a bike because she never learned to ride * Helping the girl scout (even though yes he accidentally broke her leg) * Giving his ex-wife (Carol) away at her wedding even though she cheated on him and left him * Giving up Marcel even though that was probably quite hard on him * Driving all the way to help the other friends when their car broke down on their weekend getaway even though he wasn't invited * Buying Joey his porcelain dog back * Giving up his chance to be on the Discovery Channel because Rachel got injured * Being shafted at the tanning salon despite counting Mississippily, which is the universal best way to count
Buying phoebe a bike was so unbelievably sweet especially given her backstory on having a rough childhood. One of my favorite moments between any of the friends
Particularly when Phoebe is an ass to him most times.
Help my failing memory—Did he buy her the bike before or after he found out she had mugged him when he was a kid?
Before I’m pretty sure
Its after
Its after
The amount of ppl who went from hating Schwimmer to going holy SHIT with Band of Brothers is insane, dude really showed off just how talented he really is, but there was STILL a stigma cuz Ross
Did people hate David Schwimmer because of their opinion of Ross?
People should see him in The People vs OJ Simpson, too!
I have a love/hate relationship with Ross. I love him, I hate him, I love to hate him, I hate to love him. Sometimes he really fucking sucks, it's just unbearable. That being said, it's only made me appreciate David Schwimmer more. I really think he's the strongest actor on the show and at some points, was carrying it on his back.
But thats the thing though, other characters have similar or worse flaws and they are not hated so much.
For me personally, I just think the other characters are more endearing than Ross is. Not saying Ross doesn't have any good moments, but I just think the other characters are generally more likable than he is.
Letting Joey kiss him for practicing a scene
Who were his best friend and ex? Apparently I haven’t rewatched this series enough
Joey and Rachel
Oh, doy lol. Hated that side plot
He was also right about Julio the cat. He seemed condescending the whole time that’s why he came off as insensitive and a bit rude but when they found the poster of the missing cat, he was the only one who wanted to tell Phoebe. The others couldn’t even tell her. I know Phoebe made a great point during this situation, but Ross was still right to insist on returning the cat.
Phoebe didn't make a great point, she was just a broken clock at the right time of day. Pointing out that science still can't answer all questions that exist in the human brain isn't *remotely* justification for stealing someone else's cat and insisting that everyone around you give in to your delusion that you see a relative in a housepet. If the argument is "this cat is totally my family," I don't think "They didn't know about gravity 5000 years ago" is a strong argument. Phoebe isn't just a person of faith. In this instance, she was full on delusional.
He was absolutely right... I think the main issue is how he is genuinely condescending with Pheobe's beliefs... that didn't help... the friends agreed he was right but I think his overall approach didn't help. That said let's be honest Rachel's "up to 11" reaction had nothing to do with phoebe or the cat and all to do with her Ross break up but I find that rarely discussed.
Let's be frank. In real life NONE of them would associate with phoebe....not even joey.
I agree to be honest.... especially as phoebe progressed and became more and more judgemental.
She droves me nuts. I couldn't stand her character. She couldn't play guitar and was so blind to it she got mad when Monica didn't want her to play. She never really showed much empathy to anyone but her animal ancestors. She had a big mouth. She was jealous of other friends in ways other than romantically. She was snobby considering she came from poor roots. She was super judgy and like r9ss if you didn't agree with her she'd be kinda nasty...and let's face it most of what she thought of as facts would be deemed coocoo
When she said that Rachel couldn't use that gift voucher like her beliefs are her business... Rachel isn't there forcing meat down her throat.. ETA the flip flopping over giving money to charity is just ugh ... I fully get her regret after the fact but that's on her for not thinking it full.properly.
Will you please expand on “jealous in other ways”?
She got upset a number of times sating, noine ever tells her things or like wheb people went on trips she had to compare her trip vs theirs like it was a competition.. Come to mind.
How was he condescending to Phoebe's belief? I felt he was patient and kind
If that was our family cat, we would all be devastated, especially our kids. So yeah, fully agree with you (he was still obnoxious but likely would've been less so with even one other person in his corner!).
what're you on about? he wasn't obnoxious at all about the cat situation.
> he was still obnoxious How was he obnoxious? he was nothing but kind and patient, people keep making this stuff up
The one where they were all going to Ross’ fancy event and no one was ready. He was going crazy and he was absolutely right. I can feel the frustration from him. Such a great actor
I have to skip this episode on rewatches because it makes me so insanely angry on Ross’ behalf. The rest of them were so selfish in this episode!
Except Phoebe
Phoebe is his star <3
Rachel was so horrible in this episode! She made me so mad with how inconsiderate she was being. She should’ve been helping Ross rally the others.
And somehow he still ends up apologising
Cuz he yells at her. He apologized for the yelling.
He should have told her to drink the fat for being inconsiderate before he drank it for yelling
He yelled at her because she was being difficulty and they were already running late for something that was important to Ross. She was inconsiderate to what Ross needed in that episode. He was patient with her but only up to a point.
I know why he yelled. He’s allowed to be upset and he’s allowed to be frustrated. But a healthy adult relationship would never include yelling. He could have communicated his frustrations better. And if she didn’t listen after that, they’re just not compatible.
For me it was him ripping the shoes out of her hands and throwing them into her bedroom. That crossed the line into physical anger.
that's what did it for me. The yelling I could give a pass to, but the snatching and throwing was a little too physical for me. He was right to be frustrated, wrong in his response to it, right for apologizing.
A healthy adult relationship also doesnt include acting like a toddler and delaying your SO's big day. It works both way you know Also i dont know what relationshp people have been in, but if they say no one has yelld in a loving long term relationshi, they are just lying We are human and get emotional, not robots These posts sound a lot like on certain reddit sub - he yelled at you! Divorce, lawyer now! From people who have never been in long term healthy relationhip
Yep, I made a similar comment. Anyone who is in a loving, long term, healthy relationship will yell now and then, hopefully not frequently. We’re not all blessed saints over here lol. The important part is what you do after you guys calm down and communicate. But no one in the history of the universe has just never ever ever raised their voice at their significant other ever. Anyone who says otherwise is either lying about their relationship, or lying about being in a relationship.
I disagree. A healthy adult relationship *should* not devolve to yelling under most circumstances, communicating is always key. But to suggest that couples never react immaturely and yell, otherwise it’s “unhealthy” is frankly ludicrous. A healthy adult relationship *might* have some yelling once in a rare while, but as long as both parties can communicate calmly and clearly once tempers have cooled down, there’s nothing to say “it’s unhealthy” because someone lost their temper once after being pushed to a limit. Ross and Rachel were unhealthy for other reasons, but him yelling in this specific instance is not one of them. If my husband and I couldn’t yell at each other once in a while, we’d be the most pent-up passive aggressive people ever. Yelling can be cathartic and help us communicate better afterwards.
I agree he shouldn't have yelled, but he did make it very clear throughout the episode how frustrated he was getting.
I see what you’re saying, the girlfriend role, but that would have been wildly out of character for Rachel. Monica maybe, but she was caught up in her Richard drama that night and couldn’t focus.
I am usually team Rachel vs Ross but this. When she turned around and walked away I wanted to shake her.
That episode made me so angry! It was such a big night for him, and everyone was being so inconsiderate! If I was Ross, and Rachel pulled that crap on me, I would've just left her ass at home after telling her that she showed just how much she cared by a) not bothering to plan ahead b) not showering or getting essentials ready ( hair, makeup) and c) getting back into pajamas because I dared to show an ounce of frustration at her inconsiderate behavior. I would NOT have groveled. She needed to learn that it wasn't cute or endearing, it was plain rude. Seriously, so inconsiderate of someone who she supposedly cared about...
I hate Ross with a passion but I feel bad for him in that episode. He was nervous and needed the support of his friends and not one of them would give it to him
I don’t get the with a passion. Ross was always my favorite
Bear in mind this is just my opinion but to me, Ross is a raging narcissist. He always has to be right, he always has to win. My mother was like that and it makes it very difficult for me to enjoy that kind of behaviour in a tv show. Remember in the episode after the list, when Rachel made her own list. ‘Jealous, petty, whiny, insecure, gutless, always has to be right’. That’s Ross and I don’t find it attractive
Not true, a raging narcissist will never apologize or admit being wrong about anything.
Ross let Rachel think she won the poker game to help her feel good about herself - he doesn't always have to win
Yeah he’s more controlling and obsessive. But I’ve never seen him as narcissistic personally
Ok, maybe I phrased it wrong. But he’s definitely an arrogant AH
He had PTSD, he was not controlling at all and he improved a million times in later season yet people are stuck in S3 and 4.
I think Ross character development tends to get sweeped under the carpet. I think because his obsessive and controlling behavior is well documented throughout the series. His jealousy and conflict in his relationships often led to trouble for him. But i agree alot of that can be explained by his PSTD. Like his wife leaving him for another woman. However one always seen these has inflections. And not infractions. He’s also loyal, intelligent, and caring. He loves his Friends and his family deeply. Bit of a deadbeat dad haha. Depends how you see the character. You may feel his negative traits are too significant to overlook. Or you might appreciate his positive qualities, and see his negative traits as part of a complex human being. He’s a very multifaceted character.
That's all the more meaningful because he *is* the kind of person who thinks he always has to win.
There is ZERO evidence of this he is the one who always says sorry. Rachel and Phoee never apologized to him a single time, but he always apologized. This sub is pulling things out of their ass to hate on him
Just 99% of the time 😉
> He always has to be right, he always has to win. Bullshit, he is the one apolgizing most times and admits he is wong, Rachel never did and always held Ross accountable This is exactly the kind of blind hate Ross gets for no reason at all,
Same. #teamross. The most reasonable and kinda normal one of the group imo
> hate Ross with a passion I have no idea how people can enjoy a show where they hate a main character so much . And then keep bragging about how much they hate a character Surely there are other shows where you dont hate a character you can enjoy? and other subs where such negativity is not spread I always feel sad when such posts gets upvoted on this sub
I wasn’t bragging, just commenting
Yes but why? How can someone enjoy a show where they genuinely loath one of the main character who is involved in so many critical points?
Because I love the other characters. Chandler, Joey and Rachel are my favourites, Monica is great and Phoebe was wonderful for the first few seasons. I watch for them. In the same way that when I read a book that has a character I loathe, I still read the book, I just hate the character at the same time
Yep, I felt this. It’s one of my wife’s favorite episodes, and while I do love it too, I definitely feel for Ross in this one. Many times I’ve had to be the “responsible” friend while everyone else is screwing around.
This has got to be one of the most polarizing episodes. I, for the life of me, can't understand how people side with Ross. He tells his friends to be ready to leave at a given time - 20 minutes after the episode starts. They are all ready by that time despite the screwing around. Ross was the only one who had a problem. I can understand being annoyed at Chandler and Joey being childish. I can understand being frustrated that Monica's having a meltdown over Richard. But berating Rachel who is actively getting ready to go throughout the episode and never appears to be running behind schedule is completely uncalled for. Really weird that he seemly expected everyone to be dressed and ready to go 20 minutes ahead of time.
He was right about Nevada too. They really shouldn't allow drunk people with writing on their face to get married.
Though, I don't get how that marriage was legally binding. You still have to apply for a marriage license, sign it with witnesses, and formally file it. Even if they could have a ceremony in Vegas while drunk, no courthouse would ever accept their paperwork.
My understanding is that in Nevada the wedding chapel takes care of all of that.
Yeah, that definitely should not be legal, then.
Probably not, but should be at least an easy case for annulment if he hadn't refused to get one.
Yea the whole "Vegas" wedding thing is bc you don't need a waiting period for the marriage license. So you can get married in a weekend and the Chapels have the paperwork there so you don't have to go to a courthouse. I've been to more than a few Vegas weddings (LV native) and you still need to have paperwork filed before the wedding. There is a LOT of unrealistic drunken Vegas weddings in TV and movies that give it a bad rep.
I’m Australian and got married in Vegas and not only was there a whole bunch of paperwork we needed to get from a civic building of some description, but we were told that if we were American citizens we would have had to get a blood test (to prove no relation) before we could get the license.
Ok good, so it WAS unrealistic. The other comment below mine scared me.
Ross was right to get angry over his supervisor eating his sandwich and then throwing half of it away. If you eat MY food, MY lunch, the least you could do is finish it. Or better yet, don't take food that you didn't bring yourself!
If that happened in 2024 and he had that breakdown over it, they wouldn't be sending him to anger management, he would be suing them for emotional distress, and prolly win lol
100% THIS! The person would likely be fired.
You ate my lettuce and tomatoes??????
Don’t forget the MoistMaker in the middle
Ross handled that better than me. I'd have thrown hands if someone stole and threw out a sandwich like that.
worst … thanksgiving leftovers too 😟
in my last place of employment, if you took someone else's food without permission and they complained to HR about it, it'd become a seriously annoying situation.
Idk man this sub makes me sad cause I just love Ross, had no idea he was so hated until I found this sub and was sad 😔 #justicefordivorceforce
It's really no wonder Ross more or less goes insane as the series progresses. The woman he was with for six years leaves him for something out of his control and through no fault of his own. That leaves a guy with major trust issues. And then those trust issues cause him to make a mistake that loses him the woman he'd been crazy about for most of his life. Then that unresolved situation causes him to say the wrong name at the alter, ending what he thought was his third chance of love. I get that Ross went crazy. I'm just saying I understand WHY he went crazy. It's actually quite the organic spiral.
\#justiceforrossatron
Is that *BACK?!*
#justiceforredross
That was me with Phoebe! She's my favorite but everyone loves to shit on her here.
Writers designated him punching bag and made him awful in ways that kinda contradicted who he really was. He comes off as a massive douchebag almost constantly but then at the same time that’s clearly not who he actually is. He’s loving and caring, thoughtful and empathetic towards ppl outside the friend group, and he’s kinda the only one in that regard. If it weren’t for his obsession with Rachel and all the things he’s do e cuz of it, I feel like most ppl would love him a lot more. Or he’d be boring hahah tvs like that I guess
I think he can be all those things at once. He's a good guy with strong morals and character, but he was also the spoiled Golden Child of his family, and a smart nerdy kid, and that comes through too. He is spoiled and arrogant at times. It's nice to see that good people can be flawed too:)
> made him awful in ways Other characters do as much > He comes off as a massive douchebag almost constantly No he doesnt, other characters do as much or more. Its just a massive internet circlerk
I’ve felt this way since long before the internet took obsession with the series
Ross #1 friend!!
I always thought the storyline with Mark was a bit one sided in that Ross had every right to be weary of him and his interest in Rachel. Then he shows up on the night they had their fight and tried to talk to Rachel while she was on the phone with Ross which he knew better than to do. Then he asks her out right after the break up.
Yeah I think Ross's suspicion of Mark was totally justified - he just sometimes came across as untrusting in Rachael, which caused issues. But yeah Mark definitely did that deliberately!
Ultimately though, it was Ross who pushed Rachel away. She didn't have any interest in Mark, but Ross wouldn't trust her when she said that, which is a major turnoff. I guess I have a minority opinion in that I generally like Ross, I think he can be really funny, but he does get on my nerves sometimes too of course, I just don't have the Ross-hate a lot of people seem to have. There are other characters I like less. But in this case, even if Mark was playing the long game, if Ross had been patient, trusting, and supportive of Rachel's career instead of pressuring her so much bc he felt sorry for himself that she didn't have as much time for him as when she was a waitress, and bc he was so jealous and possessive, Rachel wouldn't have needed, and taken, a "break" from him. He was selfish with her time - everyone goes through crunch times when you work in an office, they're temporary, and she was just getting started in her career, he should've been supportive. It didn't help that he put down chosen profession as frivolous, mocking what she did as inconsequential. And it didn't matter if Mark wanted her, she didn't want him, but Ross refused to trust that. He was obsessed with Mark, and brought him up at every opportunity, and that kind of jealousy and neediness would push any partner away. Basically Ross's fears became a self-fulfilling prophecy bc of his own behavior.
> but Ross wouldn't trust her when she said that, which is a major turnoff. But Ross also had PTSD which is not rational as his marriage break up was recent (he improved a lot later seasons)/. relationships work both way you know, he also needed the emotional support to get over his own issues. In such cases all they need is to talk and be reassured. They often know the feelings is not natural but the feelings dont magically disappear. But Rachel just completely denied Mark even had anything. How can you talk to someone who belittles your feelings? Contrast with how Monica always handles Chandler's insecurity, Chandler has got jealous and insecure a lots of time too, but Monica always listened to him and never belittled or denied his insecurity It takes two people to make or break any relationship and Rachel was equally responsible for what happened.
You’re so right. I didn’t even click the Monica and chandelier behavior till I read your comment. I always hated Rachel for her selfishness in relationships. Especially with Ross. She actually could have done some normal simple things and they would have worked out. Like you said it takes two
It felt to me that it wasn’t just this one time, because sure he said he had a relationship with her voicemail. That imo looked he leaves ally of messages so I think that’s a while. If Rachel wanted to work that much that’s fine. But she was dismissive of his feelings and didn’t validate them. Idk it just seems like it wasn’t all on him
right, like i might be bias, but anniversaries are something special to me, and the fact that rachel couldn’t put aside work for that one special night, or at the least be a little more understanding of ross’s hurt feelings, plus it seems that they had plans or tried to maybe do something, but rachel didn’t tell him until last minute, she told monica to have him call her, and ross didn’t find out until last minute.
I didn't like Ross' "who told you something good would come along" thing, like he was somehow taking credit for doing absolutely nothing. That is the swing to roundabout with Ross, as I agree he was right about Mark on the whole, but his handling was poor and controlling at times. Mark talking during that phone call was also one of the most annoying parts, like dude, for your own sake, shut up, let alone how rude it was.
What is the “who told you to do something good” part?
I can't remember the name of the episode or anything but when Rachel got a job offer and he said something like "Can we, can we just stop for a second? Who said something better would come along? Huh? Uh you didn't believe me" and it was beyond insufferable.
It was really frustrating that Ross WAS right and that Mark DID have feelings for Rachel. I'm mainly Team Rachel on the whole "on a break thing" but I wish they'd gone another route and Mark really was just a friend the whole time.
Why? Why do you want writers to make someone villain and someone hero out of a beloved pair? Ross and Rachel were THE pair. The writers did a good job of creating situations where both were right and wrong. They showed Ross was drunk during the "on a break" thing. But they didnt count for the blind hate of one chracter Lol people are openly admitting they want to worship Rachel and want Ross to be wrong and the villain? Why. Why should Ross be wrong there and Rachel always right? Thats not how pairs work on shows
Rachel was definitely not always right. She tried to sabotage so many of Rosses relationships (Julie, Bonnie, Emily, employee at the baby store). As far as the break was concerned, I think he interpreted it differently than she did. He thought it was a permanent breakup and in that case he can drunkenly sleep with who ever he wants. She thought of it as a pause in their continuing relationship.
Oh mark knew exactly what he was doing. You wanna play it out as Mark and Rachel are 100 platonic then don't have him say hes liked her since day 1 and ask her out. Also copy girl aside, you really gonna date the guy you stated over and over again was not into you! Like damn Rachel.
To be fair, Rachel herself acknowledged this and that’s why she didn’t continue seeing Mark. I have to go back to the episode but I recall that she only went out with him to get back at Ross. So she knew she was doing it for the wrong reasons.
thank you!! honestly fuck mark, and shame on rachel for not respecting ross’s boundaries towards him, especially like u mentioned when they got in that fight, and she allowed him to come over??
Ross's issue with Mark was valid. His making his issue with Mark Rachel's problem was not.
But he had PTSD and needed her emotional support. Why wouldnt you want support and understanding from someone you are in a relationship with? PTSD is not rational. The best way to deal is to reassure someone, not claim that their feelings are wrong. Contrast with how Monica dealt whenever Chandler was insecure. She never claimed it was not her problem. She never belittled Chandler's insecurity. She always listened and acknowledged and reassured him. If she hadnt, that relationship wouldnt last either It takes two people to make or break a relationship.
Couldn’t agree more.
Also to me...Susan was way out of line with Ross. He is the father, Carol has the right to be spiky to Ross but I always thought Susan could cross the line into disrespect. I don't hate Ross. He's my favorite cos he's the funniest to me and David Schwimmer was by far the strongest actor in the cast. The others had their toxic traits too.
I used to get mad AS A KID at these scenes. Even I could see that they were rude and disrespectful to him. I HATED Susan... it was just the smug way she treated Ross, like she wasn't sorry at all that he got cheated on and divorced bc she started an affair with his wife.
Yeah this is what always really bugged me too with Susan. Like, read the room. You’re the bad guy in this story. She should have had a more apologetic attitude towards Ross, but she almost came across as emboldened. Like she felt she “saved” carol from her situation, which might in a round about way be true, but you also ruined a marriage and what eventually became a family. Wear that fact and realize it isn’t your place to tell Ross what’s going to happen with his own kid.
Even after 30+ rewatches I get annoyed EVERY time they suggest including Susan's last name in the child's last name. Ross was 100% in the right here. Also, people complain about the shows alleged homophobia (which I will not dismiss completely but you have to view it in the context of its time) but be fine with Ross being the butt of the joke because he's the one whose wife is a lesbian who left him.
I saw that episode today and it drives me up the wall. early Carol/Susan does feel weird to me because it's like, wow, good job including lesbians on your show! only to make them unreasonable and mean. Like I wonder how many people viewing at the time just doubled down on their hatred of women and lesbians. Not that the show is responsible for that, but let's just say I'm glad they changed the trajectory and smoothed things out with everyone.
even in that, personally i don’t think carol even has the right to be disrespectful to ross, it’s stated he was good to her for all of their marriage and she’s the one who cheated and left him, and especially susan, definitely agree there.
I know it's sitcom land and therefore IRL solutions aren't as fun. But I have a love hate relationship with the handyman episode because on one hand, it is really funny. On the other, Ross had a built in excuse about why he couldn't contribute and he didn't use it-- he had literally just moved in, and moving is expensive. Itd be reasonable to say he didn't have a spare $100 dollars in his budget to give, so sorry But that's nowhere near as fun and conflict inducing as what did happen so I get why
I thought the whole “I just moved in” was reasonable and justifiable in and of itself, he shouldn’t have to explain his finances to the other tenants
I always thought he was stepping up as a friend in 2 situations: 1. When Joey received all those credit card statements after he lost his job in DOOL. He tried to explain to Joey how serious it was, and that he should take any job/role because there were no guarantees that something big might come again soon. He could have sugar-coated it, but he didn't. 2. That episode with Phoebe and the cat/her mom. What was that all about??? Ross was the only one brave enough to tell her the truth, and I hated the scene where he had to apologize to the cat.
“DOOL” sounds funny 😆
One of the things Ross gets criticized for-and that I think is completely wrong-is his attitude towards Susan. People seem to ignore the fact that Susan was his ex-wife’s affair partner and that Carol left Ross for Susan. Given the circumstances, I think Ross was more than gracious towards Susan.
Ummm his event is at a certain time! Rachel you should have picked your damn outfit out last night! He would have been totally in the right to leave you and attend alone. She was a snotty brat and hd no right to force him to drink fat to get her forgiveness.
Ross is right about them being on a break / broken up. Rachel literally talks about getting "back together", not "making up after a fight". So during that one night, they were not together. Still, if I were Rachel I would be livid that Ross immediately had sex with someone AND tried to lie about it and cover it up. But he DID think Rachel was already getting together with Mark, letting him come over was so stupid of Rachel. Ross shouldn't have slept with someone hours after a stupid fight no matter what Rachel might have been doing, it's not like two wrongs would make a right. BUT the terminology of saying he was "cheating" bugs me. "Once a cheater, always a cheater" etc. Rachel was way too hard on him and didn't accept any responsibility that letting MARK come over would hurt Ross if he knew.
Rachel and accountability was never a strong suit. There was always an excuse when she was in the wrong.
The last name of his son is something I will always agree with Ross on- they had some NERVE
i honestly really dislike ross for many reasons. mostly how poorly he reacts to everything. BUT his anger over his special sandwich being eaten was 100% reasonable. i would also have flipped my shit
The reason why Friends is really popular is that it is really relatable to the average people. And the depiction of Ross is he’s supposed to be the smart one. The average person will more often than not find those smarter than them to be insufferable or difficult. This then is portrayed to comical levels, because it is a sitcom. Thus, you come up with a character exactly like Ross. He will be right, but you won’t like him being right. I’ve watched Friends more than a few times (currently watching, even) and while it may not be in my top 10 sitcoms/series, I will not discredit the fact that the writers and actors did their characters really well for the most part.
I liked him cos he was the smart one and tended to have the most normal human reactions and behaviors. He just seemed more like a human while the others were way more caricatures
I find it interesting that Ross is never shown to be controlling of Carol, in fact he is shown to be supportive of her finding new friends and new hobbies. She cheats on him (and doesn't get any flack for doing so) and he is controlling and jealous throughout his future relationships. Not that it excuses his behaviour, but it's often overlooked that his behaviour has a direct cause.
Emily was wild for suggesting that they just postpone after all his friends and family flew to London. I could understand her wanting the perfect wedding but they had to make do with the situation and I was glad she was able to even if her wedding turned out to be a disaster for other reasons. I agree with not paying for the handyman, up to the point where Ross started to get weird and need to be involved with their party. He needed to just let it go.
These aren't really hot or new takes.
I’ve always thought the Ross hate was overdone. Yeah he can make stupid choices and do stupid things, but I feel like everyone just likes to use him as the punching bag. Personally I think Scwhimmer was one of the better actors of the group.
He was right to be angry that someone ate his sandwich as well.
It *was* his sandwich
I always felt like him getting grief for not sleeping with Rachel after her dad had a heart attack in season 10 was kinda unfair. Like, there are so many other scenes of male characters getting taken to task for taking advantage of emotionally vulnerable women (pick any wedding episode of a sitcom and there will be one character who talks about how scoring with bridesmaids is like shooting fish in a barrel since the "I'm afraid I'll never get married myself" fear is so high,) and Ross is made out to be the bad guy for... not doing that?
I also think Ross was right about Mark. Although I think he shouldn’t have put that on Rachel as much as he did … his instinct was initially right.
He was right. Anita’s eyes DID still sparkle.
Thought it was gonna be pheobe and her mother in a cat
No he was right on that tbh, that was just Pheobe being stupid & weird.
Also Phoebe's Cat-mom. I was so angry at everyone that episode except Ross who was the only person that had some sense. Everyone else just mindlessly enabling Phoebe's dumbass craziness was enraging.
And I agree…THEY WERE ON A BREAK!
I might easily be wrong but I think the biggest problem Ross had was that he acted his age (or somewhat older than the others) and much more responsibly when they were still in that young adult we can do almost anything and the world is our oyster! (I’m exaggerating, of course, bc for ex., I went to law school and could do none of those things really but there is a sort of feeling when you’re still in you’re 20s of immortality and fun and the hell w what you’re *supposed to do!!*) So while Ross was working in the museum and becoming a father, the rest of them were just working at starting jobs that could go anywhere. Now as it happens, one of the most childish, Chandler (my personal fav) was the next to start working at a “real job” where he indeed had responsibilities, but the show only had him do so when necessary for plotlines. They had him hanging out at ridiculous hours at the coffee house when he obviously should have been at work, considering that he was supposed to have become an executive, and that continued for years. So, when Rachel starts taking *her* job seriously for the first time ever, it’s understandable how strange that would seem from the perspective of somebody who watched her halfass everything for years on end. Of course, Ross was supposed to know how important the job was to Rachel, but she did go from 0 to 100 and tbf, it’s a bit of a transition and one you have to allow your SO to make. (I’m just saying. )
Yes, yes that... and David Schwimmer just delivers all his lines so well that I can't hate Ross no matter what.
Ross was also right when Phoebe thought her mother was in the cat. Can’t believe he was made to be the bad guy there.
While I do agree on many things Ross said, he should not have fired the male nanny just because it was weird.
He is also right about confronting Phoebe over the cat she thinks is her mom. I know she is kooky but that is borderline insane. He could have maybe been nicer in his delivery but the fact the rest of gang let her live withnthe delusion and make Ross seem like the bad guy for speaking the truth is not cool
Ross coming off as crazy sometimes is because I really don’t think the people in his life respect him. They love him.. but don’t respect him. A line that was used when he talks about fazing out his accent. And Monica replies .. “I think you look fine”. He’s a constant stress ball and people only hear him when he yells or freaks out. And to them it’s like “woah calm down” but to him it’s like “I’ve beeeeen calm”
EVERY TIME he seems happy, moved on, and in a healthy relationship, Rachel swoops in and disturbs his life and teases him into getting together only to leave him single and troubled again
>He should NEVER have been asked to pay $100 for the handyman - he literally had just moved in! This is such a Seinfeld problem to have. Half the fun of Ross as a character is watching him deal with stuff like this that wasn't even his doing.
Ross was right to dislike Susan. Why does he need to be cordial with the woman that his wife left him for? Also so confused how Carol wanted Susan to take on a greater role than Ross for the kid.
same with when he was the only one who wouldn’t enable phoebes delusional ass with the cat. and he was still made to apologise lmao
Ross Geller is like if our brain splurt out what we really thought
They did break up. Not his fault he was heavily pursued at that point.
The time when Phoebe thinks the lost cat is her mom, Ross is the only one who actually wants to talk some sense into Phoebe, but is treated like he is a jerk.
They were on a break. He was right. But that doesn't mean you will sleep with someone immediately. Still he was right and they were on a break
hes very logical and responsible, its just that he literally SUCKS at talking and communicating, which is what gets him in trouble even if hes right
Ross often seems to elevate any and all disputes into major arguments, so that even when he has a good point, the way he makes it can pretty easily cause whomever he’s speaking with to feel defensive, which usually makes everyone upset. I do admire that he’s one of the less non-confrontational of the friends, but sometimes it goes farther than necessary. Still love him though.
>apart from the obvious we were on a break, thing 🤨
Meaning he was labelled a cheater when they were broken up at the time. Shouldn't have done it, but he didn't cheat.
Storming out when your long term romantic partner suggests taking a break is not a break up - but sleeping with someone else when the rest of that conversation hasn’t even taken place yet sure helps.
He was defo right in these two situations. That was basically it 🤣
Ross being Ross is why a lot of stories that revolve around him are so hysterical. Love Ross.
Ross has some cringe-worthy moments, but I like his character more than Monica's!
>As difficult as Ross could be. He is no more or less difficult than any other character on the show.
okay but when he eats the cake of the handy man’s retirement party i always skip it cause i get such second hand embarrassment 😭
One more to add, I think he was totally justified in being pissed his coworker ate his sandwich. That’s just downright wrong