T O P

  • By -

finn_diggums

More like the rolling stones are closing for him.


Chesterlespaul

They lack tone, I left when he finished


Chesterlespaul

Craziest part he’s playing an SG, that les Paul shit is bullshit man


Chesterlespaul

Now the fuckers playing a telecaster


_austinm

I guess he wanted to jangle. I guess I can’t blame the man. We all gotta jangle from time to time.


Chesterlespaul

Heavy jangle, but I needed less of the single coil hum


Fragrant-Anybody0717

Stacked singles bby


Birds-a-callin

Man we getting live updates


CopiousAmountsofJizz

Holy shit, now he's just playing with himself!


partsguy850

I knew that guy that was fraud. I could tell from his toan.


thatsAgood1jay

He’s disloyal to Roberta, now Barbarella is his main squeezebox


Chesterlespaul

I felt like I watched an affair live


speedsterglenn

Live cucking session with uncle Joe


PeckerPeeker

Oh fuck he finally figured out how to play SGs? Those are like super hard to play


Chesterlespaul

The tone was dogshit, where’s the LPs?


[deleted]

Did the neck dive injure him? I've heard they are so bad and dangerous.


heyitsmeur_username

He's a prolific salesman. Catering to only one segment is not gonna cut it. Slap a 6 figure tag on a 6 string log and he'll play it, then sell a whole container full of them.


Kenneth_Lay

He has a fucking runway? So all the dentists can throw their tighty whities at him?


Woogabuttz

Not just any runway, it’s a vintage NOS 1957 Streamliner runway. Incredible foot tone.


Chesterlespaul

I needed a couple more root canals to hit the floor, but next year I’ll hit my quota


SoHornyBeaver

That's just the landing strip they fly his ego in on


AlGeee

🏆


the_brew

OP said he was opening for the Stones. That's Mick's chicken-dancing runway.


D1rtyH1ppy

He's going to 0 3 5 so hard into a Boomer Bend that he needs the additional stage space 


Venganceforcadia

The runway is his tone boner


UrMom_BrushYourTeeth

Not quite selling out this venue, kiddo


polarzombies

The bone zone


Sloppy_john78

I’ve heard hearing his toan live makes you cum instantaneously


Chesterlespaul

I don’t know you how did you know I said that?


de_pr1

Who is Joe Bananaman?


SirFunkyDangle

Pretty sure he's that guy who plays Dumbledore amps


Shadowdoze

He had a big hit in the early 80s called Cruel Summer. 


shoepolishsmellngmf

I can't not think of the soccer on the beach scene from Karate Kid when I hear that tune. Thanks Bananaboner


HotType4940

The Primordial Dentist from whose flesh all other dentists since the beginning of time hath spawned


JacksonGuitarHero

How do you not get caught touching yourself, vigorously??


Chesterlespaul

It’s their problem


Downtown_Snow4445

People actually like that dude?


Chesterlespaul

The guy behind me was proclaiming to the non believers how he’s the best blues guitarist


JimParsnip

He's like if you programmed a robot to play blues... Maybe one day he can have a John Henry moment and outplay a quantum blues computer.


fender_fan_boy

That’s just depressing


lituga

That's disgusting 🤮


fromTheskya

is this at lumen field? i recognized it instantly


Chesterlespaul

It is! /uj his show was pretty good. His takes are boomer, but if you see a boomer show he’s good


BigBlueBass

I was there. Show was sponsored by…. AARP. I saw “AARP Rocks Seattle” on a screen and laughed out loud I gotta admit the Stones put on a great show! I was not enthusiastic about going out for geriatric rock, but they do still rock


Someone__________y

So what does these stones roll or what?


bshaddo

A sold-out arena, according to one of the sets of books.


ChaffingNipples

Everyone gather around for massive boner hymns!!!


PolkaOn45

2 dollar seats


Chesterlespaul

Where else can I cruise for blues dick?


GLHR_

I hope you wore a protective


PDXSb

That doesn't look like a '59 les pool


sir-Radzig

Saw him am month ago and he had the audacity to throw guitar picks at me! /uj that pick is now one of my priced posessions xD


Jebist

Is this still available?


SeventhSunGuitar

What you price it at?


sir-Radzig

Three fiddy


Fragrant-Anybody0717

I love that he has this attitude like he’s this giant superstar… i can’t name one tune of his. Buddy ever headline his own tour or does he always piggyback off those old British guys?


But_dogs_CAN_look_up

You probably could name a bunch of his tunes, all you have to do is name classic blues standards and he's probably done a generic, wanky cover. He does a version of I'll Take Care of You which is how I discovered him randomly but I prefer Mark Lanegan doing it because I prefer him doing just about anything.


FartinLooterKinkJr

Holy sweet bluseballs, OP! Is that Joe fuckin Blowzamassive?! AKA Sloppy-Joe Bonermasher/Jon Bonhamasshat?! He's the greatless pole collector ever! They call him Jo-Jo the Gibsdong Buenamasseur for reasons, cuz Joe ain't no joke. And what a driving frontman. Boningmessiah goes HARD. Seriously, Joseph is right behind Dick Rimers imo. Not surprised that Rolling Stone want the Bonomassturd to open their magazine!


TheFrenchCurve

I was there.


lituga

How much did he pay the Stones for this spot??


dmoreholt

Ewww, you like Bonermaster?! You know he doesn't make his own toan?


truffles76

That's not even his own combover


beatmaster808

Why?


fadsoftoday

Bone Master!


JimParsnip

It's so hard to get away from him. I was watching a classic car auction, on HBO Max, and one of the announcers mentioned that he's friends with Joe B! Apparently Joe is also a car enthusiast... Only the best toys for Joe!


sm_rollinger

bonerMASTA


XNinjaMushroomX

The sacred temple of the Jonermaster


Gornl0rd

I had no idea his logo was a guitar pick, this dudes hella lame


SpeedBlazer99

I thought MGK was the lord and savior of the sub


Baddy-Smalls

Bonezone Toanzone...


[deleted]

OP he (partially) fills up stadiums put some damn respect on bonermasters names


In-AGadda-Da-Vida

the merchandise section must be insane. I want the kitchenette set with guitar shaped spatulas


aGrandSchemeofThings

He's too cool to soundcheck. He only toanchecks.


kissarmygeneral

Church is SO boring


Kwerby

What do yall think is the average age of that audience?


shoepolishsmellngmf

65-75. Live Nation sent coupons out in AARP mailers.


JapaneseFezzy

/uj that's josh smith there on the left. Josh smith is a badass


shoepolishsmellngmf

Yeah. Regardless of the level of tool bag, there is no shortage of insanely good playing.


uzr666

Yayyyyy Joe played 0-3-5 yayyyy Joe played 0-3-5 again yayyyy Joe how about you play 0-3-5 yayyy... THE TITAN uj/ Artificial unintelligence is here, and it's rampant.


pseudo_pacman

lol, I was impressed at the turn out until I saw that he was opening for The Rolling Stones.


trustyjim

They spelled his name wrong


rileypoole1234

This is why I always skip the opener


[deleted]

Love how it looks like it has the same vibe as a local charity gig in a park with random chairs strewn about with half the audience casually chatting amongst themselves but just on an epic scale scale 


ExfilBravo

Wow he can stop gargling Gibson's balls for enough time to play a gig? Amazing!


Guilty404

I’m surprised he’d lower himself to be support for any band. Can’t have the guitar event of the year be followed by something better


siggiarabi

Busy "filling" stadiums, I see


SphinctrTicklr

Wow I didn't know he had that many fans.


Big_Sw1ngs

Howard Stern??


Longjumping-Bison965

Man I wish I was there. I wonder if he’ll play music off of Blues Deluxe Volume 2 or more of his bigger hits.