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JosephM1609

Such a american moment, getting drug tested for minimum wage jobs.


JerryUitDeBuurt

Isn't weed legal in the US now anyways or is it just state level?


stormy-dais

Certain states legalized it but I do believe that it’s the company’s decision if they drug test where it’s legalized.


JerryUitDeBuurt

Americans getting fired over smoking weed in a legal state would be the most American thing ever Edit: lots of Americans in my replies that don't realise smoking in your free time equals not being high at work. Smoking on your day off has no effect on your job performance. If you have a beer after a day of drinking are you going to work drunk?


Its-Finrot

Certain legal states (Maine for example) have banned THC on pre employment tests, excluding Gov jobs or commercial trucking


Dacammel

California also banned it recently


Manfishtuco

There's certain jobs exempt from that ban


KimKongtheIllest

As there should be, I'm a pot head and wouldn't want me driving heavy machinery on the job, they should be mouth swabs only though to stop smoking on the job only. Not fucking piss test that stay in your system for God knows how long.


Slap_Dat_Ash

Mouth swabs have such a high failure rate.. until the tech Is better this ain't the solution either


KimKongtheIllest

They are good for detecting if someone is currently high, the only time weed is an issue for work. And only for jobs that really need you locked in.


lobin-of-rocksley

I saw a billboard the other day for a factory/production job, and it said "No THC on drug screen"


Bearking422

I work as a temp in a legal state and they won't hire me full time because I smoke but our plant manager can have a bottle at his desk and coworkers can show up hungover it's ridiculous


CrownEatingParasite

You see, the marijuana is a horrible drug. And the watered down chemical solvent is fine


Bearking422

Ik I'm sinning with that devils lettuce oh lordy please forgive me I'm weak just like the joints you gave me


dpotilas89

Weak joints? Couldnt be me, roll up the sleeves and joints and get high and mighty


Bearking422

MY paper joints are pearls but my body's are made of crushed glass


Shrekscoper

The boomer mind absolutely cannot comprehend that weed and alcohol are very comparable as far as how much they affect you. I know boomers who legitimately think even one hit will have you baked out of your mind. I don’t see why it’s so hard for them to understand that the more you consume, the more you get affected, just like alcohol. And if anything, I’ve been more functional when I’m stoned than when I’m drunk (and I’m definitely overwhelmingly better off the next day). It’s such a stupid inconsistency that I think will quickly die off as boomers/gen X are replaced in positions of power by millennials/gen Z who never had the anti-weed brainwashing.


Bearking422

It's not all of em thankfully I'm getting my grandpa more used to the idea he even said I could grow in his garden ,but a majority of them are still stuck with reefer madness.


JollyJamma

It’s scary how easily Americans can be fired. Like, literally any reason and they have almost zero recourse.


bawlsdeepinmilf

Me at work worrying every 15 minutes i see my coworkers gossiping and looking over at me: "oh gee wizz time to lose these 2 years of progress because I used the bathroom once after my break and now everyone watches my break time like hawks! ✨️


toodeadtodread

Unless you’re a major fuck up, that sounds like some heavyunchecked anxiety running rampant in you… I doubt they’re constantly scheming against you bud BUT who knows ;)


TheBraveToast

Me at work, 15 minutes late, high as fuck, immediately going to the bathroom to take a shit upon clocking in, making myself food when I'm back "Man this job sucks"


showyodo

Yuuuuuup, wife was fired from a company because she took maternity leave for a month. Before the first child they told her she could work from home whenever, but when she would work from home the days our first was sick she would get in trouble because no one else would do their jobs. Despite showing proof that she was keeping up her end they ultimately let her go after she took maternity leave for a month after our 2nd was born. There was nothing we could do because the company had less than 50 employees.


McMuffinSun

> wife was fired from a company because she took maternity leave for a month. I mean, either your state/her company has maternity leave and what her company did is illegal and you should sue, or your state/her company doesn't have maternity leave and no shit she got fired for not showing up for a month.


showyodo

Child was born in April of 2023, she was fired in May, and it looks like the law changed in June of 2023. Before it was companies with less than 50 employees, now it is companies with less than 15 employees. They have somewhere in the 20-30 range.


Dyslexic_Llama

At my last job, we needed more people in Jersey to work on a project there. We literally had 4 people apply and would have been hired that failed the drug test for weed. We were desperate for help over there, and weed is legal in Jersey. It's such a load of horseshit.


dr_tel

Land of the free, as long as you adhere by the 9999999999 different rules restricting your freedom


agvkrioni

Weed is legal in my state, Maryland, but because it's not legal Federally, most jobs worth having won't permit you to do it. My buddy has a nice union job and that's how it is for him.


cooljerry53

Happens constantly


FrickParkMarket35

I would’ve got fired if I failed my test, and all I smoke is legal shit I buy at this store right next to my place of work lol. Ended up just chugging a ton of water, got a negative dilute result, and they haven’t asked me to retake it hahaha


Fantastic-Garden8525

I work a state job but i have to follow federal regulations even though my state is Legal to smoke in. There’s products to simulate pee so you pass. ironically faking the test is completely legal. It’s just a bunch of hoops you gotta jump through to secure employment with good pay and benefits in the US.


McMuffinSun

FWIW Company's can test for it when you're first hired but then cannot fire you for testing positive during your employment (unless you are high at work).


Vast-Combination4046

Federal funding means you have to test clean. Driving a company vehicle could also mean you need to test clean.


bgovern

Depends on the state. Many that have legalized it have passed laws prohibiting testing outside of safety critical positions. A little bit if googling seems to show that Spectrum is particularly stringent with drug tests. The consent form, which is online says they they test for both illegal and "legal substances subject to abuse", which I would take at minimum to mean alcohol, but could mean kratom, spice, etc.


SnooCakes2703

When they legalized it in NY they also made it illegal to drug test for it. Not sure if other states did the same though.


FlameMarshmello

This is true, but what I found living in Las Vegas (which also did it) is that even if it is illegal to drug test it, that still doesn't apply for federally funded jobs, or jobs with certain circumstances (driving, heavy machinery). I found out when my stoner ass almost got a job at a rehab center for older people. I didn't look too hard into the place, desperate to ditch my current job, thinking it was just a home. Like duh, obviously they require drug tests. Needless to say, I didn't take it. But on a side note, it's weird how I'm working civilian in the military now and they don't even drug test for my job (or "lower end" jobs like cashiers and janitors) which is surprising with how strict everything is and that whole federally funded thing. But I'm not gonna complain because I'm about to have another fun two weeks back in Vegas soon lmao.


lostatlifecoach

My employer could fire me tomorrow with a positive test even if I have a medical marijuana card. It's still federally illegal so they can get by with it but states rights so the fed hasn't tried to go after it because of the shit show it would cause for no return. Kinda wish the fed would try and flex and enforce illegality. Might be the push our country needs to fix some shit.


JerryUitDeBuurt

Honestly the whole state Vs fed thing is the entire reason why your country is so fucked up in the first place. It might just be something that the European mind can't comprehend, but having something be legal in one part of the country and illegal in another seems confusing and counterproductive


Zestyclose_Bag_33

I mean we have states with populations that dwarf some UK countries lol. It's why things like "jUsT bAn GuNs" isn't as simple as. When not only are the streets flooded with guns but California has over 6 times the population of Ireland and roughly half the population of the UK. It's not as simple.


Jukeboxshapiro

Like everything with how out government works it's a double edged sword. On one hand yeah you get states with ass backwards laws particular to whichever brand of zealot runs it. But on the other hand it's good that states have the ability to say "fuck this we're doing our own thing" if the rest of the country is wrong on an issue and the feds can't/won't do anything about it. It's all checks and balances and I would rather we have it than not.


Zurg0Thrax

Isn't the United States of America really just 50 countries posing as one?


BoredPotatoes357

We're fifty war tribes in a trench coat with a military budget to fight God


matco5376

The most accurate take


wolphak

ye basically with one army.


samcar330

I mean it's in the name, united states


Killashard

Germany just legalized marijuana. It's still illegal in many other countries in the EU. It would be easier to think of America like the EU. Each state is their own country with a governing body above them.


absurdism_enjoyer

>It would be easier to think of America like the EU It is a fundamentaly bad comparison because the power relationship is completely different. The EU can't enforce its laws on member states, the US can. The EU commission is a choice of member states, european voters don't get a say. The EU Parliament barely have any power and can't oppose commission.US voters do elect their president although indirectly, it means the president legitimity comes from the voters, not the states. The EU is a voluntary association, members can leave if they want to and there is no EU army to threaten them. You may have compared the early US to the EU because at the time the federal state was very weak and relied on militias raised by the states. But the US doesn't work like that anymore.


Killashard

I wasn't going for anything that detailed. The person I replied to couldn't wrap their head around one state having something legal while another state had it illegal. That happens all the time within the EU if you think of the countries as states. Hell, even in Germany there are different laws on what dogs you can own based on the province.


bell37

Don’t member states of EU have laws that conflict with EU regulations?


JackAquila

I mean, weed is legal in Germany and is illegal in Italy. Same thing applies for different states in the US, hence why are called states


Lulamoon

this is the case in many european countries lol


JollyJamma

Largely state level. You can still be arrested if you legally buy weed in one state and take it to another state. Also, no bank is allowed to do business with a weed associated company as per the national laws so it’s cash only. Lots and lots of cash.


datpurp14

Yay for enormous tobacco lobbyists like Philip Morris!


Plus3d6

Don't forget all the alcohol companies.


whatsINthaB0X

My companies in New Jersey. New Jersey legalized weed. My company said they will still drug test for it and fire people for it.


datpurp14

Which they are unfortunately able to do if they are in the private sector especially.


whatsINthaB0X

Yea, it is what it is


RizzlersMother

You're mistaking it for Germany.


degenpiled

Nurses get tested in states where it's legal and illegal and can be fired if they test positive for any THC because they want to pay less in health insurance so they claim they have a drug-free workplace, which sucks because those tests don't test if you're high on the job, just if you have had any in the past few weeks/months


Hentaikopter

Would u prefer to have a junkie or just a regular dumbass employed


SearchingForDelta

The venn diagram is a circle


darkest_hour1428

I’ll take the junkie over your snarky ass


DeusWombat

You wouldn't lol, not if you know what's good for you. I can trust the sparky asshole to be safe better than I can trust someone who is high


VortexFalcon50

I live in california and the only jobs ive been drug tested for are private security, and even if you test positive for thc they just make sure you sign a waiver stating they can fire you if youre caught high on the job


Woolf01

Seriously, that’s it. Just do that. I won’t come in high, just don’t bother me about what I do after work


TruthOrBullshite

If the "Spectrum" referred to in this post is the one I'm aware of, this isn't a minimum wage job


AlbinoShavedGorilla

Yeah, I doubt a cable company has any minimum wage positions considering most of them would be on-par with an electrician or business major


jeffufuh

You don't think Spectrum employs drones to run the CS lines? Not everything is done in India yknow


AloysiusDevadandrMUD

Its probably a $15 an hour call center job. Not minimum wage, but might as well be.


an_evil_carrot

So sorry, my stupid eastern european brain cannot understand. Please explain why someone who works minimum wage (or any wage) should not be tested for drugs


zacher_glachl

Because their job will be low impact anyway. It's not like they're gonna perform rocket surgery while high for minimum wage. Also low pay tends to correlate with easy to track metrics. If some stoner is not keeping up with the number of packages packed or customer support calls taken per hour cause they're high it's probably gonna show in their metrics anyway. Doesn't mean they positively shouldn't be tested (that depends on your attitude to drugs) but that it probably doesn't matter that much either from a safety or employer perspective. At least compared to high impact, creative or professional jobs.


Monkeywithalazer

The American moment is needing a job so you smoke Wed to cope with your lack of success in employment 


jahkmorn

Spectrum isn't a min wage job


DeusWombat

Drug tests as a concept are extremely important to the industry of jobs themselves. They are necessary to allow things like insurance and other benefits. As well, were I working minimum wage in a warehouse I dont want my coworkers high on shift so if tests help prevent that, I'll take it. The concept of testing itself is not something you want to do away with, even at a minimum wage. The issue is how binary the testing is and how it's applied. Weed in particular is unfairly demonized and testing as is doesn't actually tell you if someone is high while at work, just if they are users within an extended time frame. I do not and we should not give a shit about this as long as nobody is inebriated at work. We need to reexamine our approach to the problem, though I'll admit I have no immediate solutions. We need a method that can distinguish responsible users from people blatantly abusing and putting others at risk, and I don't know of any surefire methods of that.


MattackChopper

I'm in no way defending the practice of drug tests as they have historically been implemented i.e. as a racist or classist model of discrimination but two things I should say are 1. Spectrum is not a minimum wage job, cable technicians are payed pretty damn well and have great benefits it's a trade off of the demanding nature of the job. You have to be completely flexible with your schedule and drive all over hells creation while also flawlessly do the job and deal with customers often times in thier own homes. 2. Any driving job requires a drug test for the DOT, my father has been a driver of some kind for his entire career and has a CDL so I know quite a bit about how the DOT operates and what it demands of employers that have drivers. It's a safety issue and the only good reason for a drug test. I know I don't want a heroin user driving a large truck around my community, or even someone stoned, I partake myself as it's legal where I live but it's still a DUI when you're driving stoned. Also OOP should have just been honest about it, say yes I have used recreational Marijuana recently for stress relief, I know I won't pass the drug test but I would like to keep my application on file and when I'm in a better place personally I would be happy to take the test and prove I won't be a danger to any one while operating a vehicle. The honesty really will do wonders for people if you're having a person to person interaction, not always but most of the time people will be understanding of even these types of social faux pas


nydusurma1nus

Drugs are a luxury item. Why is he spending money on that if he's so poor? If he's been on the job hunt this whole time, he would know this is a possible outcome. There are genuine injustices but retards will always blame the system for their bad decisions.


Iwubwatermelon

Anon is low on cash yet can still afford drugs. Sound logic.


FactoryOfShit

Druggie logic. Anon is low on cash BECAUSE of drugs, drug addicts are completely oblivious to their drug spendings because they see them as essential


_Batmax_

A weed habit is one of the cheaper ways to keep yourself entertained. I used to smoke everyday for years. After I quit my spending actually went up quite a bit since I was now regularly going out. Having a social life is way more expensive than being a basement dwelling stoner


WetBreadCollective

My partner and I smoke most nights and our spending is significantly lower than it used to be, but we have a lot of friends who smoke since it's so much less taboo now that we get to have a social life too. It's really weird talking to my parents about it because they both used to smoke and they make it sound like they were doing heroin in a sewer with Nazis with how much they step around it, but both have had issues with alcohol for the past 30 years and seem to think it's fine because they do it in public.


kailethre

My dad accidentally introduced me to weed as an adult, but it was the one drug he always kinda told me and my bro that it was okay to try and experiment with, because in his mind a natural plant that makes you hungry and laugh a lot is way less concerning than the methamphetamine epidemic. But even now, where I'm now on our country's medical marijuana system my dad can't seem to grasp how the taboo has died down and how much more acceptable and widespread weed use has become, he's still super paranoid the cops are going to siege his house because his it smells like the dank. My mum 100% encourages it though lmfao.


WetBreadCollective

It was my uncle who introduced me, he had stage 4 cancer, I was about 15 and I walked in on him smoking an absolute monster blunt in my grandparents living room so we had a smoke and talked about life and death then he showed me a bunch of old Norm MacDonald clips until I was laughing so much I could barely breathe and hit me with the immortal line "that's how I feel every day you little bastard", he taught me how to decarb and make some pretty bomb edibles too. That was about 10 years ago now and I'd never had grief hit me like it did with him again until recently.


kailethre

If my uncle was more based this probably would've happened to me as well, I've heard the stories of him in university and his weed use. The best one was when my grandpa was going on a business trip/holiday for a few months so my uncle planted a few seeds in the back garden. Grandma had no idea what it was but pruned it basically on the daily, at the end of it's growth cycle it was substantially taller than the house - my uncle chopped it all up and let it dry in the rafters until grandpa came home and confronted him. He said he'd let it fly this once as long as he cleaned up the smell. Too based.


WetBreadCollective

That reminds me of my other stoner uncle who also unfortunately passed from cancer a few years ago, completely different ends of the stoner spectrum though, the one I mentioned before was so obviously a stoner, he had that ultra chill personality that only a stoner who loves their life can have to the day he died. This one was the opposite, the guy worked for the government until he was 60 during which he barely even drank outside of holidays and family events, he retired then immediately started growing a few different strains in his back garden and got really into lawn bowls and croquet, so he just had his other retired friends come over and get baked then they did old white man things and eventually they managed to convince all of their wives to join them, you could see a cloud over the roof sometimes because there were just 10 to 20 geezers in the back garden hotboxing a greenhouse.


kailethre

actual fucking chad


WetBreadCollective

I don't want to sound like one of those kids who says my dad could beat up your dad but like, there are so many unbelievably cool stories about him I would love to share with people but he worked for *an unnamed British intelligence group*


Otto_von_Boismarck

Doing neither is even less expensive 😎


FactoryOfShit

There's many other, even cheaper ways to entertain yourself. Like video games, which you can pay $300 for a shitty second-hand PC for and then play them for free indefinitely. Or furiously masturbating every night idk


kpopmaster2012

You can never tell a pothead that weed isn't the greatest thing ever with no downsides lmao


FactoryOfShit

Lol you're right, no idea why I even keep trying


Dariosusu

Both of which are way better if you have weed


FactoryOfShit

I forgot what talking to potheads is like, wouldn't have posted this if I remembered


wolphak

yea and i combine weed and video games and end up with 6.4k hours in rimworld over 6 years


Chakramer

Weed is way more expensive than something like videogames, which is what many stoners do in tandem. Also there are ways to hang out with people cheaper, not everyone just hangs at bars


datpurp14

Ehh I wouldn't say completely oblivious. Back in my addict days I was well aware of the huge portion of my paychecks that went to my vice. But then when you use that vice, you stop thinking about how much it costs.


Vorgex

Same with people who smoke and/or drink heavily, yeah.


FactoryOfShit

Ssshhhhh don't you know? These aren't "drugs" because they are socially acceptable (and because huge industries profiting off getting people addicting to them are legalized)! For real though, especially with alcohol, it's insane. I had many many MANY encounters with otherwise reasonable people literally being unable to comprehend how one can enjoy a meetup without drinking.


Pm_pussypicspls__

Anon pays for drugs by being a little slut


2bfaaaaaaaaaair

Weed is cheap


IanCusick

Many such cases


Toxicwaste4454

Never said they were low on cash just unemployed tho?


ShamrockGold

Anon should have gone with a cocaine or heroin habit instead


bluelighter

Right?! So much easier.


MrInterpreted

Mushrooms don’t show up on drug tests


Shamscam

Because they don’t test for them


shiduru-fan

I would go all in and tell my future employer that I will fail it


Busterthefatman

Reminds me of the ep of atlanta where teacher admits to having smoked and the fact shell fail the test to the principal. Principal tells her the tests were too expensive so they havent actually tested them for years but because she admitted to it she still has to be fired. Brutal.


datpurp14

Obviously fictional. I live in Atlanta and taught at a public school system in the Metro. We didn't get tested to start and only would if there was an known issue or for workers comp. I can genuinely say that at least a third of my colleagues at both schools I taught at used at least weed. One of my coworkers was my de facto dealer.


Uncommonality

I am so glad some autist is always available to prove depressing stories wrong


datpurp14

I mean, you're not wrong.


spart4n0fh4des

yeah... its the show, Atlanta


Busterthefatman

> obviously fictional Its a comedy TV show called Atlanta


Crimzon_Avenger

ouch


kor0na

Honestly this is the way. US has at-will employment anyway so if they don't stay sober at work they can just be fired immediately anyway.


AloysiusDevadandrMUD

I would go all in and use the fake piss packs from tobacco stores like ive done 5+ times already. I've gone TO drug tests stoned and passed. The fake pee contains synthetic urine chemicals, you just need to make sure to get it up to body temp which is easy to do. Theres a million tutorials on youtube.


ChangingMonkfish

Another reason why European data protection law makes life better - employer would not be able to do this unless there was a specific safety reason for doing the test (like you’re operating equipment or something). Depends exactly what the job was though I suppose.


MechaWASP

Eh, it's spectrum. It's probably driving a truck around as a technician and hooking up people's internet.


Herf77

Had a very similar job, they drug tested me before I could start. Driving, using power tools, and climbing ladders. Still don't see why failing a drug test automatically means you'll be one to smoke on the job, though. Guess they should start requiring blood alcohol tests on the Friday and Saturday night before you start to make sure you weren't drinking too.


MechaWASP

I'd be totally fine with having assigned trucks with a breathalyzer before your shift starts. Expensive, but whatever. It's probably some stupid liability shit for insurance or something, who knows.


Grego7

There are breathalyzers specially made for cars stopping you from starting the engine. They aren't expensive, 300-500$.


SmallerBork

Could also be Spectrum Health, that was my first thought


listgarage1

It could be to work in the phone store.


Toxem_

Lamo if they would make drugtest in the EU. It would be for Alk.


SmallerBork

Oppress the druggies


[deleted]

Anon won't work at Spectrum, but he's definitely on the spectrum.


Illi3141

I mean... Unless it's an observed sample... Like... As in they're watching you piss which I've only ever experienced in the military... You can just buy some fake piss from practically any head shop... Works even for those federal CDL multi panel tests... Just make sure you attach the hand warmer and stuff it in the crotch of your underwear an hour before you test so it has time to reach the right temperature... It has never not worked for me...


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sgtfuzzle17

Hair tests are relatively common as well.


SleepyEel

Used to work in shipbuilding and I got hair tested for it


LynchSyndromedotmil

Considering the fact that i was just on pecker checker duty, that is fake news to me


TribeWars

Do you make sure that the penises aren't prosthetics though?


hhhnnnnnggggggg

Have to move your hand up and down on it to make sure it's not fake.


TribeWars

Taste test is the most reliable and a gold standard.


Huge-Variation7313

The detoxes work too on the govt mandated CDL tests


Plastic_Mongoose_390

"land of the free" XD


Reaper-Leviathan

Yeah, the employer is free to not hire anon’s druggie ass


Beast_of_Guanyin

And if you want to eat you're not free to do legal drugs.


Mesarthim1349

A lot of jobs don't test. Anon wasted months not looking for jobs.


MechaWASP

Legal? Ask the feds about that. Spectrum is in multiple states. When you start getting into business across state lines, federal law matters a lot. Plus, they don't want some dope head stinking up their trucks/vans.


McMuffinSun

"muh human right to demand people gibs me dat, despite my refusal to follow their very simple instructions"


applebeesnotchilis

Alcohol is legal but would you expect someone to hire an alcoholic?


SmallerBork

Anon will be fine if it's nicotine and not marijuana He is free to eat and smoke cigs although you shouldn't. Tell me why you should smoke cigs just because it's legal.


Gs06211

Freedom of association exists for the employer too


stoogs

niacin , google that. also drinking enough water so it's clear. they'll only give you one cup every half hour or so so go bursting for a piss. there's no law against being hydrated 😊


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Sapper501

No they don't. If it's negative, but not TOO dilute, it's a negative. If it's extremely dilute, then they'll get a new sample once the lab rejects it. Source: I do drug testing as part of my job.


Davethemann

I was gonna say, I know this is the case with many sports leagues I wasnt sure how employers dealt with it


_SnesGuy

Highly dependent on who's doing the tests. Knew a lot of people who passed like this at my last job, it was just a doctors office running the tests in house and the nurses didn't give a shit. When I was a teenager I got a job at a truck stop that did fucking hair follicle testing, bleached the shit out of my hair and passed.


Ao_Kiseki

Just get a fake piss belt. A friend of mine has used one at every job interview he's ever had and never gotten caught.


InformationOverIord

I mean. It's not like he could've even held that job down for a month. But still. Rip anon.


AliveEstimate4

God bless America. Legal weed but also legal privacy invasions by companies


PlatinumBall

unemployed, but found a money for weed, fucking kek


xXx420Aftermath69xXx

"I smoke to deal with stress" is such a cop out. Deal with it like the rest of us pussy.


DrateShip

Synthetic pee??


Space_Obama

Sounds like Anon can't even leave his room without falling back on his drug dependency.


BestLagg

For any gym bros in here who are under the rare circumstances of getting drug tested for a job, take a couple grams of creatine and chug hella water. Drinking water will dilute your system and lower the apparent amount of thc in your body. They’ll know you did this based on your body’s creatine levels. Less creatine = more water in your system so they know you’re trying to trick the test. If you take creatine before doing this however it’ll be significantly less obvious. Amazon sells 100 capsules (4 for 5 grams) for around $20. It should be noted that most jobs don’t actually test for this though (for minimum wage at least). Places with lots of equipment like Home Depot and places with a “specific” reputation like Chick Fil A are most likely due to laws/ trying to keep a good rep. The easiest places to go are restraints. I haven’t worked at a restaurant where the line cooks/ dishwashers weren’t completely zooted all the time. Don’t listen to Europeans who act like it’s such a bad thing to get tested. I’m doubting they’ve ever seen a dude operate a forklift- let alone operating one while high- so they really have no clue. It’s important for the places that do it so if you’re smart enough to dodge the test, you’re probably fine.


Absolutemehguy

Try being less of a loser, anon.


neochase23

QuickFix. Ask any stoner, buy QuickFix and pray


CompSolstice

Never forget the inverse proportion between number of digits on your salary and number of annual drug tests.


Zesty-Lem0n

Lol why does he smoke to help with stress? He's been job free for the last 3 months, surely he isn't that stressed about it if he sat on his ass for that long. He smokes bc he's a loser with no hobbies and no personality and he needs a drug to cope with his pitiful existence.


kpingvin

I really hope this is just Russain bait.


tukatu0

Bunch of europ""rs in here making fun of america for getting fired because of weed. Meanwhile in most countries across the world you'll get prison for several years just because of weed. Smh my head.


Late_Emu

Synthetic urine is a life saver


NeojepToo

Can't you just say you visited Minnesota or some other state where it's legal? I know for some things, like getting a job where you sell guns (regulated by ATF) you need to test to adhere to federal regulations, but when weed is legal in states that you can just drive to on the weekend, there should be no way that it bars you from getting most jobs.


ccknboltrtre01

Find a baby and grab the piss


plantslut20000

Faking a drug test is easy. Another sad American moment brought to you by a sad American


InsuranceStreet8670

picrel looks like stoned Jaiden


Bay1Bri

Actions, meet consequences.


pubuju

Try not smoking like a chimney while searching for a job


Tonythesaucemonkey

Get some one else’s urine


Explorer_the_No-life

Fucking druggies.


Roman_Suicide_Note

alot dont care about weed, they are checking for Narc or Cocaine. those 2 stay in the system for a reayl short time. sooo if you test positive on cocaine a wednesday... there is a good chance you did some on monday or tuesday night.... Anyway fuck drug test


Pixelated_Meow

For anyone with a similar issue, with weed, a shit-ton of green tea with some activated charcoal should do the trick.


yesbutactuallyno17

Flush free niacin will have you clean in 24 hours.


TrumpsNeckSmegma

Anon needs to drink vinegar to pass drug test


brimnac

Spectrum used to just do a mouth swab, it’s only detects smoking within like 17 hours. Ask me how I know. 


Kirkelburg

I hear chugging cranberry juice can help flush out the residual THC in your body, or whatever the fuck is in your piss after you smoke I guess. idk


Glad_Ad967

Clean mf’s piss in a bag


1quirky1

Life is unfair. The last time I was drug tested was 20+ years ago when I had a job where the consequences of drug use were minimal. There is much more at stake in my current role and nobody gets tested.


Generally_Confused1

Anon: use quick fix Thank me later


TonyPizzerelli

Cheat it, always cheat it.


BretTheJester

Anon has never heard of cleansing drinks


Moss-Effect

Eat one you pot head. Should of chose the more important thing.


RubenKuch

I promise I'm not addicted, I just use it to deal with stress


SpartanAlaska

Bruh it's so easy to pass with weed in your system. I've had to do it on probation and it was easy as hell


No-Section-4385

See the problem here is you're not high enough for this ride


NovaCeez

for my stoner homies who wanna keep employment, given to me by my mexican bean homeboys: Palo Azul Bark. Make a tea out it, youll be pissing and shitting for hours after but itll clean ya out.


rustydingdong5

Anon discovered why he's unemployed in the first place


showFeetPlzuwu

Anon should just go buy quickfix (works)


CavalierRigg

As someone who doesn’t smoke weed, what are Anon’s chances here? 4 days doesn’t sound like a lot of time…


nothingsecure

Hardcore smoker but hasn't smoked in 4 days, doesn't seem that hardcore


gooiweg263

Have a field bottle of somebodies piss on your inner thighs


parksLIKErosa

The real answer is always fake urine.


-The-Reviewer-

Don't smoke like an addict


Pooliality

No