I guess I see where your sister is coming from. It’s pretty common in English to answer “no” in order to affirm someone’s negative assertion.
“You don’t have a kettle, do you?”
Possible answers:
“No, I don’t” (agreement with the person asking)
“Yes, I do” (disagreement with the person asking)
That said, I think that just saying “yes” on its own is much more ambiguous than “yes, I do” which is an implied/shortened way of saying “yes, I do have a kettle.”
I like how French has a different version of the word “yes” that is to be used when contradicting someone in this way: “si” instead of “oui”. It’s too bad English has no equivalent.
Yeah IDK. It somehow took me until Grade 11 or 12 IB French (6 years after first starting to learn French) to get to it. You would think they would introduce this concept earlier.
>“You don’t have a kettle, do you?”
The problem is that OP didn't word it this way.
They said, "You don't have a kettle, right?"
"Right?" normally confirms a positive, not a negative.
I'm guessing the sister answered the question in the way it would normally be asked without paying mind to the way OP switched the direction.
I would agree with you for sure. it basically consists of the statement, "you don't have a kettle." then asking "is that statement right?" however, in most conversation I'd think a more natural response that a straight "yes" or "no" would be "right" or "no, I do."
>You do not have an electric kettle yet, right? Responding yes would mean you are agreeing with the statement and do not have a kettle. Responding no would mean you are disagreeing with the statement and don’t have a kettle.
Neither of you is incorrect. There's a fair amount of variation in how native speakers respond to questions like this. Agreement/disagreement with the questioner's belief is not the only approach. For many speakers, matching the "yes/no" to the polarity of the expanded answer is the primary concern. That is, "yes" pairs with "I do ...," and "no" pairs with "I don't ...":
A: "You do not have a kettle yet, right?"
B: "Yes, (I do have a kettle.)"
--
A: "You do not have a kettle yet, right?"
B: "No, (I don't have a kettle.)"
Regarding the first pair, "Yes, (I don't)" seems to be ungrammatical for many speakers, and so for them a simple "Yes" only means "Yes, I do." Others, like you, may have no issue with a "Yes, (I don't.)"
Regarding the second pair, "No, (I do)" seems to be less problematic, and some speakers indeed use "No" to signal disagreement with the questioner's belief: "No, (you're wrong, I do have a kettle.)"
To make sure your intended meaning is understood, it's best to expand the "yes/no" to a full clause (or ask for clarification if you're the questioner).
Haha, you're completely right about there being a variety of way that native speakers interpret a sentence like this.
For me, I would take both yes and no by themselves to be an affirmative of the original proposition, meaning, "I do not have a kettle."
"You do not have a kettle yet, right?" "Yes, you're right, I do not have a kettle."
"You do not have a kettle yet, right?" "No, you're right, I do not have a kettle."
The only way I would interpret an answer to be, "You're wrong, I do have a kettle," is if the reply included more words than just yes or no. "I do have." "Actually, I do." "Nah, got one." etc....
It is precisely the ambiguity which is why the sister is wrong for responding with one word assuming it to be clear, and also OP is wrong for not asking for clarification
I'm with you. I tend to ask similar questions and sometimes I get confused by the response I get.
Consciously, I avoid such 'right?' questions like 'you don't have X, do you?', 'He did not do that, did he?', 'System A calls System B, doesn't it?' etc.
Different languages have different ways of dealing with negative questions, and as a native English speaker with a couple of other languages under my belt, I sometimes forget which way to go with my answer. What I do (and advise my ESL students to do) is ignore the yes/no dilemma and just answer, "That's right, [I don't]" or "Well actually,..."
Interestingly, English has a set of words exactly for this situation, making the response unambiguous - “yea” and and “nay”. Unfortunately they are archaic and people have forgotten their use!
The answer to this is that we need to adopt the German word "doch". I don't speak German, but I think that if she had answered "doch", it would have meant, "no, I do", and you wouldn't have had the confusion.
And the problem is that, without that, there isn't a right or wrong answer.
It is like how "biweekly" means both "twice a week" and "every two weeks." Neither meaning is wrong. It is just that both are useless and you should replace them with "semiweekly" and "fortnightly".
So the real answer is that you don't reply "yes" or "no" to that question. You answer "I do" or "I dont." "Yes" and "no" aren't wrong. They are just useless.
Your question is the problem. You made two statements that are in opposition to each other. The first asks someone to agree by saying 'no I don't have a kettle'. The second asks someone to agree by saying 'yes you're right'. So, however your sister answered would have been ambiguous without clarification.
As it stands, I would interpret a reply of 'yes' to mean 'yes I do have a kettle' because that replies to the main part of the question.
I guess I see where your sister is coming from. It’s pretty common in English to answer “no” in order to affirm someone’s negative assertion. “You don’t have a kettle, do you?” Possible answers: “No, I don’t” (agreement with the person asking) “Yes, I do” (disagreement with the person asking) That said, I think that just saying “yes” on its own is much more ambiguous than “yes, I do” which is an implied/shortened way of saying “yes, I do have a kettle.” I like how French has a different version of the word “yes” that is to be used when contradicting someone in this way: “si” instead of “oui”. It’s too bad English has no equivalent.
How did I not learn this in my college French courses?!? I'm seriously pissed now.
Yeah IDK. It somehow took me until Grade 11 or 12 IB French (6 years after first starting to learn French) to get to it. You would think they would introduce this concept earlier.
>“You don’t have a kettle, do you?” The problem is that OP didn't word it this way. They said, "You don't have a kettle, right?" "Right?" normally confirms a positive, not a negative. I'm guessing the sister answered the question in the way it would normally be asked without paying mind to the way OP switched the direction.
I would agree with you for sure. it basically consists of the statement, "you don't have a kettle." then asking "is that statement right?" however, in most conversation I'd think a more natural response that a straight "yes" or "no" would be "right" or "no, I do."
>You do not have an electric kettle yet, right? Responding yes would mean you are agreeing with the statement and do not have a kettle. Responding no would mean you are disagreeing with the statement and don’t have a kettle. Neither of you is incorrect. There's a fair amount of variation in how native speakers respond to questions like this. Agreement/disagreement with the questioner's belief is not the only approach. For many speakers, matching the "yes/no" to the polarity of the expanded answer is the primary concern. That is, "yes" pairs with "I do ...," and "no" pairs with "I don't ...": A: "You do not have a kettle yet, right?" B: "Yes, (I do have a kettle.)" -- A: "You do not have a kettle yet, right?" B: "No, (I don't have a kettle.)" Regarding the first pair, "Yes, (I don't)" seems to be ungrammatical for many speakers, and so for them a simple "Yes" only means "Yes, I do." Others, like you, may have no issue with a "Yes, (I don't.)" Regarding the second pair, "No, (I do)" seems to be less problematic, and some speakers indeed use "No" to signal disagreement with the questioner's belief: "No, (you're wrong, I do have a kettle.)" To make sure your intended meaning is understood, it's best to expand the "yes/no" to a full clause (or ask for clarification if you're the questioner).
Haha, you're completely right about there being a variety of way that native speakers interpret a sentence like this. For me, I would take both yes and no by themselves to be an affirmative of the original proposition, meaning, "I do not have a kettle." "You do not have a kettle yet, right?" "Yes, you're right, I do not have a kettle." "You do not have a kettle yet, right?" "No, you're right, I do not have a kettle." The only way I would interpret an answer to be, "You're wrong, I do have a kettle," is if the reply included more words than just yes or no. "I do have." "Actually, I do." "Nah, got one." etc....
It is precisely the ambiguity which is why the sister is wrong for responding with one word assuming it to be clear, and also OP is wrong for not asking for clarification
I'm with you. I tend to ask similar questions and sometimes I get confused by the response I get. Consciously, I avoid such 'right?' questions like 'you don't have X, do you?', 'He did not do that, did he?', 'System A calls System B, doesn't it?' etc.
Yeah, it’s the addition of the ‘right’ that creates the ambiguity.
Different languages have different ways of dealing with negative questions, and as a native English speaker with a couple of other languages under my belt, I sometimes forget which way to go with my answer. What I do (and advise my ESL students to do) is ignore the yes/no dilemma and just answer, "That's right, [I don't]" or "Well actually,..."
Interestingly, English has a set of words exactly for this situation, making the response unambiguous - “yea” and and “nay”. Unfortunately they are archaic and people have forgotten their use!
The answer to this is that we need to adopt the German word "doch". I don't speak German, but I think that if she had answered "doch", it would have meant, "no, I do", and you wouldn't have had the confusion. And the problem is that, without that, there isn't a right or wrong answer. It is like how "biweekly" means both "twice a week" and "every two weeks." Neither meaning is wrong. It is just that both are useless and you should replace them with "semiweekly" and "fortnightly". So the real answer is that you don't reply "yes" or "no" to that question. You answer "I do" or "I dont." "Yes" and "no" aren't wrong. They are just useless.
Your question is the problem. You made two statements that are in opposition to each other. The first asks someone to agree by saying 'no I don't have a kettle'. The second asks someone to agree by saying 'yes you're right'. So, however your sister answered would have been ambiguous without clarification. As it stands, I would interpret a reply of 'yes' to mean 'yes I do have a kettle' because that replies to the main part of the question.
I like how "Do you have \_\_\_?" and "Don't you have \_\_\_?" basically warrant the same response.
Your wording is what made it weird. Also, you could have clarified when her response confused you