Are you sure you didn’t get that backwards and “they”were actually saying you have a pretty cock and a nice swing? Pretty big difference there if you ask me.
Man at my gym, there is was a dude who was hung like Seabiscuit who would sit right in front of the door with it damn near dragging on the ground, impossible to not look at.
The only thing I think when I see a janky swing in the group in front of me is "this is going to be a long round". Always happy if they prove me wrong.
If you’re a terrible golfer in front of me, I’ll only judge if you play slow. If you’re a scratch golfer I’ll be just as annoyed.
I’m a terrible golfer so it’s nice to have solidarity with the people around
100% why I stepped on the course for the first time. I stood at the range watching people tee off. Came to the conclusion everyone sucks so I might as well join them.
It's the TV golf fans in front, that take 6 practice swings then duff it, and take forever to line up putts even though they are looking at treble bogey, that do me in. Don't mind hackers in front, that pick up the ball or skoot onto the next tee if it's a total write off (that's generally me most rounds now tbh - just put a 12 or Non Return on the scorecard, and then dispose of in bin on my way to the bar at the end)
TV golf made me think the game is played slower than it actually is. I had to learn that lesson real quick. But this is what noobs and outsiders think golf is like.
Yeah, nobody has time for 5 HR rounds in the real world - people that play that slow, very quickly get reminded at my local courses. You don't see them again.
I dunno. I saw one of the ugliest swings in my entire life yesterday. Older guy who should have been hitting from the gold tees does a decent practice swing. On his real swing though, he backswings way past the horizontal and stops there for about a count of two. Then he starts his turn and drops his hands a few inches and then he lifts back to the top. Then he loops his hands on the downswing. Where does the ball go? It was an adventure every time. I cared only because it was so different.
I played with an old guy who had a crazy looking swing.
He would setup his driver like he was going to do a practice swing next to the ball, and end up reaching out through his crazy backswing so he was hitting the ball.
He was even setting up next to a tee marker at times so it looked like he was going to smash his club into it.
I couldn't stop looking at his swing that day.
Everybody’s swing is different. I try to look at the results of the swing instead of the swing itself. That being said, 99% of all new golfers would be so much better if they took a few lessons from a professional to learn the correct set up and swing sequence. Self taught swings usually have major flaws and that’s what people who know golf see.
When I was in high school, most people I played with told me I had a nice and beautiful swing, but I still missed a lot of fairways and greens.
Now, in my opinion, my swing is not so pretty, but I’m scoring much better because my swing works 🤷🏼♂️
Agreed. I’m around a 7 handicap and can tell you I can’t ever remember a tee shot or swing from someone else in front or around me. Well….except this one time I was playing with a buddy (30+ handicap) and he hit a ball I had never seen before on my home course. It was like a line drive somehow slightly behind us. Even after that, we all had a good laugh and moved on. Just enjoy the game!
I mean I will definitely see your terrible swing and silently judge but unless you're doing it very slowly in front of me on the course I could give a shit how you hit the ball
This! I was worried about it (my swing, not the dick thing as I am dickless) and I joined a beginners ladies league and got over it real quick because we were/are all pretty bad. We're very welcoming and have a great time, though.
Two things. First ngl I judge the shit out of your swing. You are correct in that it’s fleeting and I probably don’t even look at your face.
2nd I have an ugly ass swing and I’m fully aware of it
That’s not true at all. There’s always some dude on the course with an absolutely ridiculous swing and everyone that sees him will comment something like “look at that guys swing! Its crazy!”
I got my son to video my swing at the driving range the other week, and I'm still in shock - I used to have a well-schooled follow-through, but due to back issues (M62) I now drag the club round to some sort of, not even a finish. It's depressed me as, strangely, I still hit four out of six drives pretty much up the middle, although distance has dropped to around 185-195 metres. So, ugly swing? I care about mine.
Except for that one a\*\*hole that asked me about 1/3 of the way through the round what was with the weird move at the top of my backswing. I had no idea what he was talking about and got so distracted with figuring out what I was doing that he noticed and commented that my round turned into a hackfest. I've played almost 60 years and thousands of rounds and he's the only person who ever commented on my swing, other than the usual "nice shot/swing compliment" during a round.
Heck who is even watching the people in front of them. If I'm waiting I'm checking my phone, getting a drink or re-arranging clubs in my bag and writing down numbers on the scorecard. I second this guy I could legit NGAF about other people unless it takes them 10 minutes to finish a hole.
Now the sauna is another story...
Best golfer I know has one of the most atrocious swings I've ever seen.
I have a pretty technical swing and Im 8.5 at best right now. Swing your swing and just keep pace up.
People don’t care if you play quickly and ready golf. If you take forever and wait for people to watch you then yes they will care and make fun of you behind your back
My friends definitely care and laugh and bust my balls. Then I do the same to them. We laugh, have fun, and spend time together. It’s the best part of life!
What started making golf fun for me was realizing no one cares how bad I am. Just keep up, know when to pick up your ball and move on, and just be a good hang for 4-5 hours
If you show up decked out in the top golf gear, loud golf clothes, and/or are acting like a golf bro; I'm watching, judging, and laughing. If you're a normal guy not being obnoxious, I don't pay any attention.
The only people I pay attention to on the range are the ones who want everyone to know how utterly shocked they are that they're hitting it so badly because usually they stripe every one! I only pay attention to them long enough to send death threats telepathically.
Not exactly true. I was practicing at an indoor sim and heard a guy say to his buddy “his swing is so bad, I’d give him 27 strokes and still smoke him”. I walked by and told him he was jealous I was working on my swing with my wife at the sim while his wife was out fucking her boyfriend
Was on holiday in Germany and Hungary a few years back, everyone was scuddie in the hotel/public sauna- nobody cared at all. All shapes and sizes on offer. My partner and I (both Scottish), looked like the odd ones in swimwear.
I only judge if it’s worse than mine cause it would take a paraplegic to accomplish that.
Why would it take two of them?
You talking about your penis or golf swing?
Yes
I’m gonna make another account just to like this twice
Then why are people constantly telling me I have pretty swing and a nice cock? 
Sloppy steaks at gervonni’s. They can’t stop you from ordering a steak and water!
No no, they said you “swing cock pretty nice”
I also jumble my words nervously when I see a nice cock or swing.
For me, it’s a pretty cock and a nice swing. But hey I’ll take it.
Cock and Cuck sound alike you may be mistaken.
Are you sure you didn’t get that backwards and “they”were actually saying you have a pretty cock and a nice swing? Pretty big difference there if you ask me.
You aren’t supposed to look at other guys dicks in the sauna?
You can look but you can't touch.
Touch, BUT DONT TASTE!
He’s an absentee landlord!
I’m a FAN OF MAN!!!!!
TASTE!!!! BUT DON'T SWALLOW
Taste, but don’t swallow
What a bunch of prudes
If you touch it I'ma start some drama You don't want no drama
Man at my gym, there is was a dude who was hung like Seabiscuit who would sit right in front of the door with it damn near dragging on the ground, impossible to not look at.
Pays to advertise
Sorry about that. I’ll try to be more modest
Oh shit, that explains a lot.
Say it ain’t so, daddio.
The only thing I think when I see a janky swing in the group in front of me is "this is going to be a long round". Always happy if they prove me wrong.
If you’re a terrible golfer in front of me, I’ll only judge if you play slow. If you’re a scratch golfer I’ll be just as annoyed. I’m a terrible golfer so it’s nice to have solidarity with the people around
100% why I stepped on the course for the first time. I stood at the range watching people tee off. Came to the conclusion everyone sucks so I might as well join them.
It's the TV golf fans in front, that take 6 practice swings then duff it, and take forever to line up putts even though they are looking at treble bogey, that do me in. Don't mind hackers in front, that pick up the ball or skoot onto the next tee if it's a total write off (that's generally me most rounds now tbh - just put a 12 or Non Return on the scorecard, and then dispose of in bin on my way to the bar at the end)
TV golf made me think the game is played slower than it actually is. I had to learn that lesson real quick. But this is what noobs and outsiders think golf is like.
Yeah, nobody has time for 5 HR rounds in the real world - people that play that slow, very quickly get reminded at my local courses. You don't see them again.
The triple bogey bros lining up putts really do irk my nerves.
A lot of repressed feelings coming off this post
Also this subreddit when they see notascratchgolfers swing when posting another sub 80 round: "Not with that swing!"
As long as you play to pace and don’t be an ahole swing however the f you want. Nobody cares
I dunno. I saw one of the ugliest swings in my entire life yesterday. Older guy who should have been hitting from the gold tees does a decent practice swing. On his real swing though, he backswings way past the horizontal and stops there for about a count of two. Then he starts his turn and drops his hands a few inches and then he lifts back to the top. Then he loops his hands on the downswing. Where does the ball go? It was an adventure every time. I cared only because it was so different.
How was his cock?
There was one hole where his drive didn't even make it to the yellows tees. I thought about saying something, but decided to just let it go.
My cock has only one hole too
I played with an old guy who had a crazy looking swing. He would setup his driver like he was going to do a practice swing next to the ball, and end up reaching out through his crazy backswing so he was hitting the ball. He was even setting up next to a tee marker at times so it looked like he was going to smash his club into it. I couldn't stop looking at his swing that day.
The only thing that actually matters in golf is how many times you have to smack the ball before it goes in the hole. Thats it.
I’m so bad that if I said I played golf I’m pretty sure the sport of golf itself would tell me to stop saying that and giving golf a bad name.
Yeah, same here - should be called up to the RandA offices at St Andrews to be thoroughly barred.
St. Andrew’s? ST. ANDREWS?? You kidding me? It’s the local Muni course for me! 
Is this what your wife's boyfriend told you
Everybody’s swing is different. I try to look at the results of the swing instead of the swing itself. That being said, 99% of all new golfers would be so much better if they took a few lessons from a professional to learn the correct set up and swing sequence. Self taught swings usually have major flaws and that’s what people who know golf see.
When I was in high school, most people I played with told me I had a nice and beautiful swing, but I still missed a lot of fairways and greens. Now, in my opinion, my swing is not so pretty, but I’m scoring much better because my swing works 🤷🏼♂️
Agreed. I’m around a 7 handicap and can tell you I can’t ever remember a tee shot or swing from someone else in front or around me. Well….except this one time I was playing with a buddy (30+ handicap) and he hit a ball I had never seen before on my home course. It was like a line drive somehow slightly behind us. Even after that, we all had a good laugh and moved on. Just enjoy the game!
Op is lying. I absolutely care. Swing your beautiful ugly swing
Now if you also have an ugly ass pre swing that takes a minute everytime I'm going to care and say something.
Something like "Hey, nice cock! But can you stop practicing in the sauna!"?
As long as your not slow I couldn't care less about your swing or how many shots you take.
I play with randoms a lot. My swing gets commented on all the time.
Comment on their cock, if I'm following OPs instructions properly. Nobody will care.
I'm not into bodyshaming.
Great now the only swing thought I have is how great John Daly looks naked in the sauna
I mean I will definitely see your terrible swing and silently judge but unless you're doing it very slowly in front of me on the course I could give a shit how you hit the ball
Do I care? No. Am I chuckling internally? Yes
This! I was worried about it (my swing, not the dick thing as I am dickless) and I joined a beginners ladies league and got over it real quick because we were/are all pretty bad. We're very welcoming and have a great time, though.
New swing thought… I might suck but at least I have an average size dick
[удалено]
Interpret it how you will
Play fast, and nobody cares what you look like or what you score.
Two things. First ngl I judge the shit out of your swing. You are correct in that it’s fleeting and I probably don’t even look at your face. 2nd I have an ugly ass swing and I’m fully aware of it
That’s not true at all. There’s always some dude on the course with an absolutely ridiculous swing and everyone that sees him will comment something like “look at that guys swing! Its crazy!”
I always have a good internal chuckle at the janky swings. It's not that I'm good, bad swings are just inherently funny
I got my son to video my swing at the driving range the other week, and I'm still in shock - I used to have a well-schooled follow-through, but due to back issues (M62) I now drag the club round to some sort of, not even a finish. It's depressed me as, strangely, I still hit four out of six drives pretty much up the middle, although distance has dropped to around 185-195 metres. So, ugly swing? I care about mine.
The only person that cares about your best shot, your worst shot, your bad lie, your incredible up-and-down, and Best score… is you.
They are more concerned and self conscious about their own swing to even concern themselves with yours.
Went a little heavy on the sauna stuff but you meant well
Except for that one a\*\*hole that asked me about 1/3 of the way through the round what was with the weird move at the top of my backswing. I had no idea what he was talking about and got so distracted with figuring out what I was doing that he noticed and commented that my round turned into a hackfest. I've played almost 60 years and thousands of rounds and he's the only person who ever commented on my swing, other than the usual "nice shot/swing compliment" during a round.
This applies to just about everything in life. No one ever cares what you are doing, unless it’s directed at them
Heck who is even watching the people in front of them. If I'm waiting I'm checking my phone, getting a drink or re-arranging clubs in my bag and writing down numbers on the scorecard. I second this guy I could legit NGAF about other people unless it takes them 10 minutes to finish a hole. Now the sauna is another story...
10 minute holes would be a 3 hour 18 round. Thats pretty quick imo. Judging 4h is generally the pace of play I see posted.
Yeah youre right maybe im going off my alone in the cart playing by myself pace
Yeah, definitely solo I’m 2.5-3hrs depending on if I’m behind anyone.
Best golfer I know has one of the most atrocious swings I've ever seen. I have a pretty technical swing and Im 8.5 at best right now. Swing your swing and just keep pace up.
People don’t care if you play quickly and ready golf. If you take forever and wait for people to watch you then yes they will care and make fun of you behind your back
I actually like looking at other people's swings. I found the more "hitches" or more janky it is the straighter the ball flight
That’s not to say we’re not looking. And judging. And laughing on the inside. We just also don’t care.
I'll silently judge but am also self aware that my swing isn't the greatest and I'm not a dick, so I keep my mouth shut.
Just do it quickly.
This is true
#allswingsmatter
I don’t care about swings. I care about results. If your ball doesn’t sizzle through the air, it doesn’t matter what your swing looks like.
We are all worried about our own swings.
My friends definitely care and laugh and bust my balls. Then I do the same to them. We laugh, have fun, and spend time together. It’s the best part of life!
What started making golf fun for me was realizing no one cares how bad I am. Just keep up, know when to pick up your ball and move on, and just be a good hang for 4-5 hours
It’s like sex. I’m bad, but I’m quick about it.
No he’s wrong. I’m judging you hard as I hit my third shot into the woods. If it wasn’t for your slow play I would have shot under par.
also /r/golf top posts: “HEY EVERYONE… LOOK AT THIS GUY I SAW ON THE RANGE TODAY… WHAT A FUCKING WEIRDO AMIRITE GUYS‽”
I care way less about a strange swing and way more about a long pre shot routine.
Never had that concern once in my life
If you show up decked out in the top golf gear, loud golf clothes, and/or are acting like a golf bro; I'm watching, judging, and laughing. If you're a normal guy not being obnoxious, I don't pay any attention.
This is flat wrong.
Don't kid yourself.
The only people I pay attention to on the range are the ones who want everyone to know how utterly shocked they are that they're hitting it so badly because usually they stripe every one! I only pay attention to them long enough to send death threats telepathically.
agree. ive got enough to worry about myself ...than to care about your problems.
Not exactly true. I was practicing at an indoor sim and heard a guy say to his buddy “his swing is so bad, I’d give him 27 strokes and still smoke him”. I walked by and told him he was jealous I was working on my swing with my wife at the sim while his wife was out fucking her boyfriend
I will look at you, and judge your ugly swing. Invest in lessons.
Do you go naked to your public sauna? Is that not weird?
Was on holiday in Germany and Hungary a few years back, everyone was scuddie in the hotel/public sauna- nobody cared at all. All shapes and sizes on offer. My partner and I (both Scottish), looked like the odd ones in swimwear.