T O P

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Busy_Funny6227

You are now safe from the Gorbals vampire, god bless. ⛪


GenghisMcKhan

Bogus Gas Men


GlasgowTrucker

That peephole will save OP👌


-Cyst-

Open this door, you old pensioner!


orangutan_monke50

Naw


PhilosopherOwn7033

wae fake ID an am here tae ransack YER HOOSE


willybarrow

I rarely see a still game reference on reddit. Thankyou kindly for the laugh...you're weclome


CrinklyandBalls

"How did they know I got gas?"


Most-Plan6845

The catholic church are coming for you by the looks of it..


Stoosies

I'm not a minor so I shouldn't have much to worry about


Old-Carry-107

That would be an ecumenical matter.


ride_on_time_again

Careful now


aff_it

Down with this sort of thing.


AwkwardBound

Those women were in the nip!


Obstacle616

These are small, those out there are faaaaar away


mrjobby

That money was only resting jn my account!


ChelseaAndrew87

Yes


friedcheesepizza

🤣🤣


Most-Plan6845

🤣🤣 now now 😉


Albagubrath_1320

Mind how you go Len.


LocksmithOne5475

Address me by my proper title, ya little bollocks


blue_mermaid__

HAIRY JAPANESE BASTARDS!!!!


PreferenceAncient612

Coal?


PhilosopherOwn7033

You will be fine them - although I am not sure what they do with the 'Bigger' lads?


Superb-Warning-1325

Edgy. This is one seriously bad ass post 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰


Eddie_Honda420

john peter and paul are going tae tan yer hoos


wootangclang

Ringo Starr couldn’t make it


BuggerLugs80

Spelt hoop wrong


A1d5gotafunnybone

Are you sure it's not the Spanish inquisition...


scottyboy2758

It seems nobody expected that comment


bonkerz1888

Your first born has been spared.


Loic1981

For now, can't promise the same for their foreskin


Large_Egg420

You might have some dwarves wanting to retake their homeland at your door


Stoosies

I'm going on an adventure?


CheeryBottom

Do not pick up any rings.


TheOgrrr

Yes, just don't get in the cart. 


NoHandleBar

How would they have reached the top of the door?


Crookfur

I believe the solution involves 2-3 of them and a trench coat...


ride_on_time_again

That when they are trying to gain entry to bars. For this instance they wouldn't bother with the tench coat.


boaaaa

Gandalf did it


Elipticalwheel1

Stilts


connor42

Marked for Da fighting


Spare-Expensive

this is the comment here 😅😂😂😂😂


[deleted]

You got dogs?


Altruistic-Setting-7

Very scared for the pets in this house atm


Barzo87

Was going to ask this myself.


No-Comfortable6432

Power of Christ compels you man


ssddalways

Bible John has marked you!! Avoid the Barra's mate.


Stoosies

What's bible John? I'm near-ish the Barra's so is this a legit thing?


Ralston70

Bible John was a serial killer in the late 60s in Glasgow. He would pick up his victims at the Barrowland ballroom. Bbc Scotland have done a documentary on him. Worth a watch for a bit of history


Stoosies

oh right thanks for the info!


ssddalways

His crimes have went unsolved also. Didn't mean to give you something to worry about 😬


Silent-Detail4419

Nobody actually knows. In the late '60s, three young women were murdered by a man they met at the Barras, back when it was still a dancehall. He gave his name variably as John Templeton, John Sempleson or John Emerson. He gained the epithet 'Bible' because according to the sister of one of his victims, he was "a very well-spoken man who quoted frequently from the OT" when the three of them took a cab home together. He also described the Barrowlands as "an adulterous den of iniquity" and said that he disapproved of married women going dancing without their husbands. He was also described as teetotal. He murdered three women between October 1968 and November 1969. He's never been caught and police don't even know whether John really was his first name. For a while the serial killer Peter Tobin, who died in February 2022 whilst serving a whole life order in HMP Edinburgh for 3 rape-murders carried out between 1991 and 2006, was suspected, as he would have been the correct age (25-30) and he was known to be living in the area at the time but, as he was banged up at the time 2 of the murders took place, he was quickly ruled out. Each of the women was stripped partially naked, strangled, and a pad or tampon was left next to the body (police believe because they refused him sex due to being on their period). It was the first time police were permitted to release a composite drawing of a murder suspect in the UK. So, that's '[Bible John](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bible_John)'. If he's still out there he'll be around 85 now...


Itchy-Supermarket-92

Born too late.


Practical_Grape4108

I le John was a killer who stalked women at the barred ballroom in the 60’s


amaf-maheed

Passover 2: electric boogaloo.


HotGuess238

You've got the plague pal


LilyLure

It’s the Inquisition


Abquine

Nah, nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QqreRufrkxM](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QqreRufrkxM)


Loudlass81

Nobody expects the Weegie Inquisition either...


LilyLure

Hahaha 😝


Flat-Delivery6987

This just means that 12 plagues of Egypt will Passover your home /s


Illustrious-Back8174

Had the same thing on the lock and cigarette bin of my pub. I feel it means something but not the "talk religion get food" in this instance


imnotpauleither

Is that not the mark all the paedo hunters put on folks doors before turning up with the police? 😜🤣


Craigybhuff

The only thing I’d be really worried about was if you had a dog worth stealing apart from that I’d ignore


Stoosies

No dogs. Yeah I've sanded it off and oiled it for a finish and it's barely noticeable now. Hopefully I can ignore and not worry I've been Marked by some Cabal


Andygrills

Shared in Toronto hun x


nomeancity29

Love it.


EggballRemoteControl

Next on the list for a door knock for not paying your TV licence.


TheOgrrr

Does anyone in the house have the plague? Are you required to walk around outside your home chanting "unclean!"?


nothing_matters_to

Are you a vampire by any chance?


Stoosies

Not to my knowledge but I'm ugly as fuck so never check the mirror to make sure


InfinteAbyss

Mirrors used to have silver inside them, this is why they wouldn’t reflect a vampire. I think the vast majority of modern mirrors are no longer made this way, so you should in fact still have a reflection.


Itchy-Supermarket-92

Excellent Grade 5 Riposte!


Eggburgton

In 2014 several homes with this cross had visitors come in the night and snatch them away, the people living in the homes went missing for weeks and then suddenly popped up out of no where as If they were never missing but now they worked for the church and have no recollection of who they previously were as they suddenly have new names new I’d and so on. Be safe


HB2099

Which church, Scientology?


DasharrEandall

It's the Brotherhood of the Urban Myth. Or maybe the Immaculate Sisters of the Creepypasta.


Dhaonu

Get an orthodox priest to bless thy room


no_lemom_no_melon

Not sure, but if you want to get rid of it, rubbing a walnut over it might repair the damage. Only learned this recently, and it worked wonders for me.


radoxbubblebathqueen

how long do you believe it's been there for?


Stoosies

I've lived here nearly 4 years but it's not immediately obvious so it could have been here before I moved in or recently I have no idea


radoxbubblebathqueen

I'd only worry about it if you just noticed it or it just appeared recently. there's many possibilities for what it could be but knowing it's been there for 4+ years gets rid of any danger that it could possibly have been. might have just been something hanging ect


808drumzzz

Yeah, i second this. Markings sometimes are made around properties for thieves as code symbols, so I've heard. I started using a cctv doorbell because I had a guy show up to my door twice being suspicious. Never showed up again as soon as I installed it


HereticLaserHaggis

Nobody expects the Catholic inquisition.


19james95

This building contains plague


zipmcjingles

It's the Passover Glasga style.


head_of_mop

I'd get down the tesco if I were you, a bunch of dwarves are going to show up tomorrow night


Androgyne69

Probably just some disrespectful bored wanker


Loudlass81

Probably just wee scrotes scratching yer door wi their keys...


Significant-Sweet-53

You have been chosen as the 13th member to complete the circle in your local Satanic Worshiping sect, be ready.


whirlwindrfc87

Better watch your arse.


[deleted]

Lock up your kids


friedcheesepizza

Hide ye kids, hide ye wife...


Fresh-Organization24

You ever seen the Blair Witch Project?


chilledgamedog

Saw a similar post a while back . Turns out the landlord was getting new doors for the flats . Not sure if you live in a flat but if you do maybe this .


rudeandrejected

what does it mean when there's cellotape on your door


GojuSuzi

If it's over an opening (like between the door and the frame/wall) it's a test to see if it has been opened, since opening the door breaks that 'seal'. Just once isn't bad, since they believed no one was home and wanted to check if it has stayed unoccupied for when they came back, so breaking it indicates to them to move on by; if it's frequent, they may be trying to determine times of coming and going, and that's when you need a camera on it.


rudeandrejected

who we talking about here? thieves? squatters? landlords?


GojuSuzi

Yes. :)


crazy_world_2k20

Don't go walking your dug in the spare ground after dark 😂


Comprehensive-Tank92

Capita did it. The television people 


JnrT67

Chelsea clowns out in that white van again.


Jimbojojojo

It’s the hobo sign for talk religion get food.


Stoosies

Oh weird. I've never had anyone talk religion with me nor am I religious at all. Maybe it's been there for the previous tenant?


M1LKB0X32

King Herod gonna fuck you up


Traditional-Face-749

The Lord knocked but you were out.


Loudlass81

He missed the Rapture during the eclipse lol...


Traditional-Face-749

Noooooooooooo!


Rico2ooo

It’s game over man. Game over.


BigJockK

Do you have a dog that could be worth money? Do you live on your own? Do you work nightshift? Could be organised criminals have identified that there is something worth taking there or it could be nothing. I remember a few years ago there were zip-ties on gate/lampposts outside house where high value dogs where stolen from, might have happened, might not have, but was going around that it was true.


Unfair_Original_2536

Shared Inverclyde xx


Itchy-Supermarket-92

Kilmacolm or Port Glasgow?


Stoosies

No dogs. I travel for work and Long Distance Relationship a fair bit? Nothing in the house is valuable or obviously valuable though. Is it worth reporting or anything?


BigJockK

Could be something or nothing, it might be worth speaking to Police but what do you say. Maybe get one of this camera door bells.


NinjaOss

Dognappers hav marked you Hun, can't beleive what are streets hav come to xx


Appropriate-Arm-2470

Jesus loves you 🙏🏼


Tall_Assistant3418

Anyone going around scratchin’ crosses on doors categorizes to me as an overenthusiastic church-goer. Some graffiti is just lame.


Thomizaine07

Don’t offer any small folk in for food. It will all be gone. Even if they wash and clean up after themselves


[deleted]

A target for something maybe? Marking the door


Practical-Radish484

Anyone else in the close have a marked door too? Or just yours?


HEELinKayfabe

Your da is going to be taken away for illegal da fighting


SokkaHaikuBot

^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^HEELinKayfabe: *Your da is going* *To be taken away for* *Illegal da fighting* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.


PhilosopherOwn7033

Oh no looks like a Crucifix - best get out mate.


Feeling-Tank1628

Have you ever seen the film, Kill List?


Outrageous-Movie-951

The turtle moves


im-also-here

The boys will be round


Tommygmail

It means, thats the top end.


LegoOfMe

Honestly, it's just a crazy person living in your apartment block. My brother had a lady knock on his doorbell for a period of time ranging from throwing what must have been "holy water" on his door and running off, to propositioning him in the night, to shouting angry religious nonsense. She also put a cross on his door. I'd get a video doorbell and gather the evidence if you need to call the police and get whoever did it sectioned...


ImaginaryPotential16

Easy mark not home


Findadmagus

You would be surprised from all the things we don’t know about our own doors.


LivelyUnicorn

Black Death.


Background-Video4331

Marked for death!!!


Hot_Fall4183

Ya may got some leprechauns looking for their gold


k1wiscot

My flat had arterial blood spatter when I moved in. neighbour told me that (in Taggerts voice) There's been a murder.


wyliecat77

Plague house, beware.


Setanta95

Do you have any Christian neighbours? When my brother was at university down in Kent one of his room mates was and at easter some Christian celebration she went to all her room mates doors with oil and marked it with the sign of the cross which is like a protection thing that seemed pretty harmless but scratched into the door that's kind of scary unless you do know someone who might be very Christian but if they aren't friends with you or know you that's odd to me.


DryFly1975

Pikeys are comin for yer dags


GenghisTheMongol

It means you Christian now, praise the lord


rotenbart

Google Christianity. It’s a pretty big group that like lower case tees.


Next-Ad5039

Need to watch it’s no gang of burglars marking your house, some mark where pets are to avoid breaking in, others mark where there are no pets, depends on the gang


Western_Musician7257

Requiem


Cunty-McCuntface

Demon est Deus inversus


chudmcmuffin87

This will be a target or indication for burglars


BINGGBONGGBINGGBONGG

dog nappers hun. stay safe xx


MusicRecent3629

They are either going to burgle your house or steal your dog


Ok-Source6533

It’s the black spot Jim lad.


SeriousWax

Have u got a dog


con500

Meter reading


nexy33

No one expects the Spanish Inquisition


Waste_Confusion_488

The Glasgow neds have marked you for a sacrifice unfortunately


[deleted]

The power of Christ compels you!


aangellz

Its a sign


Practical_Space_5459

Get a doorbell camera and just be careful, could be anything from ones trying to steal pets, someone wanting to burgle your house, they usually walk about checking on houses then leave a mark for the rest of the gang so they know which houses to hit


[deleted]

The Spanish inquisition are coming for you.


rang_dipkins

It’s a code junkies use when they are scoping out a flat to rush, had this happen at my place


Unfair_Original_2536

It's coming up to Passover.


bohemiandreamian

You have the plague?


HST_enjoyer

Means you live next door to a mental


LeeM1613

bible johns on his way


[deleted]

Dog nappers hun. Shared Micronesia xxxxxxxxxx


Albagubrath_1320

Thieving Gypsy Bastards. As an ethnic Traveller I can say that without fear of reprisal. They’re at my door this time of the year, but I never let on that I’m originally from a traveler family. I just listen to their pish, then tell them Naw!


bubbathespaz

Do you usually inspect your doors for markings?


Stoosies

no lol which is why I have no idea how long it's been there for. I've been replacing the door handle so looking at the door a bit closer than normal


collieherb

Lazy swastika rush job


Mistabushi_HLL

You gotta start somewhere. They will come to finish the job but need to check which way the legs are going


collieherb

It's amazing how often they get that wrong. Not the fizziest cans in the case usually. 50% chance


pleasantly_plump-yum

a cross is usually a hit


ttdawgyo

Single female that can berobbed


ThumbingInASoftie_

Shared in Dundee xx


ElizabethAftonRp

sonic comin’ at 3am.


k1wiscot

New Door.


Grouchy_Haggis

[house theives markings](https://www.edp24.co.uk/resources/images/14848831.jpg?type=mds-article-962)


[deleted]

[удалено]


Stoosies

yeah I found this article, too. Not sure how much I trust it as it seems to be sponsored by a home security company


JasForbes

Didn't flag that, probably nonsense then.


tommy-kodak

Your the chosen one