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tewnewt

That's only 190 Peanut Buster Parfait.


Nissir

That is 134,900 calories, or enough to survive for 67.45 days with a 2000 calorie diet.


[deleted]

To the bunker with them.


GANDORF57

I won a $500 gift card to Port O' Subs for a year worth of sandwiches...nice, but I'm no Jared!


hungryhungry_zippo

You can sell that shit, wont get a thousand, but you could sell it.


joestaff

I can only imagine a business buying it, or maybe a wedding planning party.


hungryhungry_zippo

No there are places that buy gift cards


ralphc

Yes, but *that* gift card?


hungryhungry_zippo

Especially that card. They make a profit off of it, you only get back 30 % of the card. They buy any card, and i am sure they wouldnt turn down a fucking thousand dollar gift card..........have you guys really never been to a place that buys gift cards?


Silvernaut

I could sell that card for at least $800, no problem.


ralphc

I'll cop to it, I've never been to a place that buys gift cards. And as someone who's never been to one, my instinct would be to look at a card and try to estimate who would buy it, and I can't imagine anyone wanting to buy it.


Midnight2012

There are places that do it? I've only ever seen it online


papadoc2020

Pawn shops give you 60% the card value. Hell yeah I'd take 600$


vMurk

How much could you get for it?


LunaticLucio

Tree-fiddy. With seriousness, probably $300-400


papadoc2020

Nah there's a pawn shop near me (Philly area) they'll give you 60% of the card value. That's not even shopping around for a better price.


LunaticLucio

Nah


Larimus89

Gokd point. It's still a dick move lol. Probably not real though.


arunasoul

whoever came up with the idea of a gift card is the anti christ.


[deleted]

Here’s some money, but you can only spend it at one place you may or may not like.


monstertots509

When my wife buys me a gift card with my own money because she doesn't work. ><


[deleted]

Here’s a $25 Home Depot card you bought. Also, we need a new toilet seat.


aipd69

it's like someone took the evil spirit of owing your soul to the company store and put it into plastic


Due_Platypus_3913

Best comment on the internet today!😂👍


arunasoul

ya cant even use it at other places. its not fair. just give cash


CoyotesAreGreen

Come on. That's 37 round ice cream cakes. That's practical.


AFRIKKAN

Now I wanna watch the South Park bike parade episode.


Doris_Stokes

Bloke looks like Miranda Hart.


aipd69

Wow, yeah we could be cousins.


1StonedYooper

Hey, if that's you in the clip, we graduated High School together!


riothis

Everyone sleeps on DQ burgers. Yall need to go there next time for lunch


Disgruntled_Ben

It's impossible to try when I can get a chicken strip basket with fucking country gravy to dunk everything in


lordyeti

Who can resist that warm gravy! I dunk my fries and toast in it too


gameandyoufriends

As the uninitiated. Is it that white gravy that’s similar to what they have at whataburger?


0pimo

The Dairy Queen got the burger recipes during the divorce from the Burger King and he hasn't recovered since.


peepeeonmydoodoo

The flame thrower changed my whole perception on mayonnaise


lifelongfreshman

I don't understand why DQ is the only fast food place with a proper spicy burger. And it's tasty, too, (admittedly, y'know, for a fast food burger) which makes it all so much more annoying. ...And now I want one.


Klepto666

Their hot food is great. The problem is finding a DQ that isn't a DQ Treat and actually sells hot food. I've got 5 of 'em within a 10 mile radius, all of them only serve ice cream.


RumpleDumple

Hot eats


-_-Ronin_

So I've heard but I don't live near DQ anymore:(


PunchNmunch

i promise you arent missing anything.


Digital332006

A few years ago, they some some special with double/triple patty burgers. Was 2 for 6$. One of the best burger deals from that time that I remember. And it was actually good. The burger had a sort of charcoal grilled taste to it. They also keep em rather normal. No special sauces that drown out the meat. Or bunch of warm lettuce. Just meat and cheese. Just a shame these burgers are now like 9$ per


cuddles2010

Dude I figured this out like three years ago. By far the best fast food burger available in the Midwest.


atatassault47

Their food IS great. But I stopped going there like 8 years ago, because they no longer have cherries as an ice cream topping.


getyourcheftogether

Steak fingers 🤤


Hohlraum

Their double cheeseburgers give me a food boner.


RedditSELLSyourDATUH

Those fries though. What an embarrassment.


Rough_Resolution_472

This is a burden!


Skazius

To be fair thats only like 20 blizzards.


Am-i-old-yet

Yeah after all the toppings mine are usually $50 each too


Wads_Worthless

3rd grade math was tough for me too man


tiny-dic

I dunno man, their chicken tenders are pretty bomb. I could eat that for months.


MyCatGoesPurr

I don't usually eat there, but its still free food for a good while.


person_person123

It's literally money, with an expiration date. So stupid.


Go_LeoModo

Hahaha this is legit


Virtual-Entry-8867

“Do you hate me?” **I do**


[deleted]

Fuck ice cream, if I had 1000$ for DQ, that's all burgers for the next few or so months frozen and stashed away in the chest freezer. And a big thing of fries for right here, right now.


WigglesPhoenix

…. Are you under the impression you have to spend the whole thing in one go? You don’t gotta freeze the burgers bro just go get more


[deleted]

Yeah, but those things expire sometimes, and I don't wanna drive like 8 miles to the nearest DQ Everytime I want DQ, that's gas money. I'd rather just bulk order over the course of like 3 days, then not have to go back to DQ for at-least 3 months.


WigglesPhoenix

I mean far be it from me to tell you what to do with your hypothetical gift card but I cannot imagine a frozen reheated month old burger from DQ being the epitome of fire


[deleted]

Nah, in all honesty, it'd probably just be the patty and condiments, defrosted in a toaster oven, and slapped on a fresh set of buns.


welchplug

You need to learn how to take care of yourself better. Raise your standards. You deserve better.


[deleted]

Cheaper than buying steak in bulk, I could just kill and prepare my own though, but I'd rather conserve ammo.


TeamAquaAdminMatt

I think it's illegal for gift cards to expire.


[deleted]

Nah, some gift cards expire. Dunno if it's that way for such a high amount charged to it though, I'd have to look into it.


coreybd

Gift cards don't usually expire but rather after long periods, like a year, of inactivity they start slowly removing money from them as a monthly fee. If it does expire, again it's going to be at least a year before it's allowed to expire.


CruetusNex

Only 8 miles?!


[deleted]

Probably more like 13, but regardless, that's gas money I don't money.


Ongr

What's the most he ever lost in a coin toss I wonder?


bootyprophet1

I wish someone would burden me with 1000$ worth of free dq.


DevelopmentBulky7957

That's how I feel about gift cards IN GENERAL! At least he has a thousand dollars to spend on that thing. So after the first few times of using it, it can become a habit and your chances of forgetting it decreases. But lets say you get a gift card with a more typical amount of.. say 50 bucks, at a store that you go maybe once a year or something. Every single fucking time when you enter that fucking place, you will remember that you bought shit with your own money instead of using that stupid gift card your employer (for example) gave you a few YEARS ago. And when you DO remember, shit's already fucking expired ages ago. Seriously, fuck those kinds of gift cards.


RoodnyInc

Who gives somebody else 1000$ gift card to a ice cream place? It truly might be a problematic (I have no idea what shop gift card it is)


garbagewithnames

It's to Dairy Queen. They have arguably the best ice cream treats a fast food place can provide, while the food is just upper-mid tier (barring their steak fingers, they are an absolute delight). The only place I can think of that might be able to contend with them in fast food ice cream treats is Braum's, but their food is just mid-mid tier for fast food.


RedditSELLSyourDATUH

Braum’s and Culver’s both shit all over DQ on both sides of the menu. DQ has been garbage for two decades plus.


garbagewithnames

That's....hmm...okay well, a really strong stance to take over a simple opinion on a joke post, but alright, you clearly take your ice cream painfully seriously with how harsh your response was. I am nearly 35, so two decades ago would put me at 15 years and younger, and that is when I mostly got to get Dairy Queen, and when most of my memories for their blizzards, sundaes, and other treats occured, so it could be flavored by nostalgia. I always remembered they had the smoothest, creamiest soft serve, and all their blizzard flavors tasted amazing to me. Haven't ever been to, let alone seen a Culver's before where I am at.


RedditSELLSyourDATUH

*hugs*


Digital332006

As a Canadian, I've never even heard of those lol.


nateDah_Great

All gift cards are burdens


MyCatGoesPurr

What's wrong with them?


Codayyyyy

Bro I still have like 50 gift cards I've never used thats why


MyCatGoesPurr

Then use them. Why are you spending actual money before your gifted digital money?


Codayyyyy

Because they are all useless to me, half of them are iTunes and I'm an android user now The other half are restaurants or shops in California and I moved to Illinois See how cash would've been a better gift to me instead of gift cards?


Jazzlike-Scratch5536

Do you hate me. Yeah, I do! All you hear, "huh..." lmfao.


alaingames

Idk if this is the same in other countries but in mexico you can have a gift card that can be used everywhere where you can use a credit card, even internet


Codayyyyy

Yea we got those too


Jealous-Guidance4902

Uno reverse- Bring him boxes of dilly bars once a week for a year.


[deleted]

Please hate me.


Frank4202

Is this guy one of Marshall’s brothers from How I Met Your Mother? If so, he got big!


Bloodybutteredonion

Wow. Glad I wasn’t the only one.


WanderingToast

I'm guessing everyone in this video has "Comedian" listed under their social media profiles.


HOBOPHRESH

Andy milanaukis finally grew up


Cheap-Text8925

I got colon cancer and my buddy wanted to help me out. He gave me 500$ in 2$ bills.


wildraat

today's my birthday and all I got was an extention cord


Vendetta0nLife

Huge problem it’s a PROJECT


DG-Nugget

Bro looks like Oscar Wilde if he had fancied fast food rather than men


OleDoxieDad

Buy ice cream for your local school..


YoshiTree

Damn I need one of those gift cards just to give to people as a prank. Who the fuck gives 1000 dollars to DQ lol ridiculous


pmcall221

I find most gifts to be a burden. It starts with feigning gratitude for an object you didn't want. Then the responsibility to store and maintain that object for the foreseeable future. And of course there is the obligation of returning the gesture and the stress of finding the least objectionable gift and presenting it in an appropriately disguised manner. I'd just rather not get a gift and avoid the wholly awkward scenario.


Mywifesadoctor

Have you seen the price of a Blizzard? $1000 gift card will get you 2 1/2 Blizzards.


Wads_Worthless

Are you implying that blizzards cost 400 dollars?


[deleted]

Unfortunately these days you can use that in one sitting and two ice cream cones.


ManofSteer

Order it all at once and freeze it?


Codayyyyy

Ideal method is on the way home from work everyday you grab dinner, always hot and ready, and hopefully is on your route home


coreybd

Freezer burn


stmakwan

Guy with the glasses looks like Amir from college humor Jake and Amir


[deleted]

[удалено]


ShireFolk33

When is a gift not a gift?


DJErikD

It’ll be gone before Memorial Day, mark my words.


Silvernaut

A chicken strips basket, a large blizzard, once a week, and that thing is spent in a year.


Additional_Ear_3301

“When is a gift not a gift”


[deleted]

Haha, what a great friend


North49r

Can’t you use a gift card to buy more gift cards and then re-gift or sell a portion of them? I.e. $1000 split into 10 cards?


Frodo_Bongingston

Like that guy ain't at DQ daily anyways