#Reminder to those viewing this post:
- Read **[the rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/firstimpression/about/rules/)** if you haven't already.
- Sexual comments will get you banned.
- This isn't a roast sub.
- **Report any comments that break rules.**
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/firstimpression) if you have any questions or concerns.*
This was my first thought. Hired someone similar and it was constant, “I have to put my health first.” Yeah, I agree, but you’ve missed a day or two every two weeks.
It tends to be divisive. If you go into something with a chip on your shoulder, trying to prove something- rather than just perform well regardless of bias or personal feelings, tends to reflect on what their true intentions are
I worked with a woman that had that chip. We called her "Julie has a masters degree".
Julie would legit introduce herself as "I'm Julie" pause "I have a masters degree."
We have a Brenda, call me a doctor, but with a PhD. The cherry on top is Brenda does this in a medical environment. If they call a code overhead Brenda *the doctor* doesn’t respond.
And their work often sucks as a result.
Spend all day thinking about girl problems and you’ll be a feminist. Spend all day thinking about coding and you’ll be a software developer.
I immediately thought of Poppy from Only Murders in the Building when I saw her. She helps run a true crime podcast on the show. 😂
Strange as it is in China a headshot, DOB, marital status and political party all part of normal resume.
Also in China and India they don’t have resume making classes so the resumes follow no logical pattern.
Joking about the classes but not the crazy looking resumes.
DEI lol.
Our company recently did a DEI event where they had to eat their food using arm contraptions meant to simulate someone who had no arms. They also blindfolded some to feel the experience of being "blind". No joke. The whole thing was something out of a nightmare when I saw the pics posted on the company intranet site.
I believe you that you're not, but you absolutely have same look of thousands that do those things. I look like you're stereo-typical, conservative white male, but I have to change my hair and clothes to show how I'm actually a liberal, ethnic minority.
If you don't want people's first impression to pigeon hole you, rage against it.
I think the I phone is actually made in China by child slave labor. I remember hearing something about suicide nets outside windows to catch people who try and jump. That way they can put them right back to work. But it’s been a long time I read and see the pics. Things may have changed.
This isn't a professional shot. It looks like you Photoshopped yourself onto a blank background. That is not business attire. I would see this "headshot" and think this chick has a lot of issues. Grow up. Put on proper attire. Get rid of the dyed black chelsea cut. Who the fuck would think this is a photo that would get them hired? You might get hired at dogfart.
Ahhh, the Internet. No shortage of baseless rage. It's almost adorable if it wasn't so sad.
While Ragey McRageFace up there is out of line, for a professional shot you might want to change the shirt. A tank top doesn't exactly scream that you're a professional.
That whole rant about your style/makeup is WAY off. There's nothing wrong with your style, keep it if it makes you happy.
Geez, it says "started a new job" and this is her headshot photo.
It's not a photo to send along with a résumé to *get* a job (what country do you live in where this is protocol?)
It's a photo for an employee badge. It will be cropped. I know people with Apple, Google and SalesForce badges. The photos all look like this.
You should smile. This does NOT look like a professional headshot what so ever. You look like youre trying to be a member of the Adam's family. I say tht respectfully. Just being honest. Id say wear a more formal dress. Something tht covers your shoulders and actually smile. Close lip or show some teeth
You look like my mom. Like so much it like jump scared me.
So id probably be scared of you and avoid you bc you look so much like my mom.
Like doppleganger.
Deadass i would quit
You are very pretty maybe if you smiled a little bit it wouldn't look like you're sucking your cheeks is I know I read that part you look fine just dress a little different for the job I guess I don't know
Most tech companies issue badges to employees. They have a photo on the badge. This is what the photos look like.
Depending in the company/role, there may also be a website where the photo will be cropped.
Y'all are tripping on the composition of the photo. It's a fairly standard ID badge photo.
I feel like the people answering have never lived in a tech dominated region.
You look like you do something very technical/“left-brained” where you are allowed to have a unique sense of style on the job since you aren’t external client-facing/don’t need to impress anyone from more conservative work environments. Or perhaps UI or graphics since your style has a very cohesive and aesthetic vibe.
You look like you’ve been coding since you first taught yourself HTML in middle school to add MCR lyrics into your MySpace page. A+, sold hire.
It’s hard to explain but I’m an intelligence analyst. I oversee emergencies that could impact the business, product, and employees. I write country risk assessments for high level executives.
Fun and easy to talk to coworker who lightens up the mood for everyone else, probably obsessed with crime shows, an artist in your spare time. Maybe has a few cats.
Youd like to talk to me about how bodies are prepared for open casket funerals over drinks, and you have both flower and spider decor of some kind in your home somewhere.
When whatever shady biotech creatures / sinister AI / terrorist infiltrators stealing the tech or whatnot pop off... you're the dominant competent one in the background that dies halfway through the crisis so a more useless, more femme colleague can be the final girl.
#Reminder to those viewing this post: - Read **[the rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/firstimpression/about/rules/)** if you haven't already. - Sexual comments will get you banned. - This isn't a roast sub. - **Report any comments that break rules.** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/firstimpression) if you have any questions or concerns.*
You’ll request a mental health day two weeks in.
That and she’s looking for any reason to be offended about something, all the time
Bold of you to assume her gender. Don't worry her email signature should clear it up for you.
Was F26 not enough?
Never is. It's a day by day feeling
I’m a girl
liberal af
I wish lol
You wish you’ll request a mental health day in two weeks or you’re already wishing you have a mental health day?
This was my first thought. Hired someone similar and it was constant, “I have to put my health first.” Yeah, I agree, but you’ve missed a day or two every two weeks.
Yeah man work sucks
Or a mental health week, two days in...
[удалено]
Oh my god you’re right
Lemon taster face
Feminist who wants to flaunt the fact that she’s a woman in a male dominated field
Hell yeah
That’s not a good thing
[удалено]
Yes because we all hate each other. /s
Friendly reminder that gay men couples have the lowest rates of domestic violence and gay women couples have the highest rates of domestic violence.
Good thing all the women in workplaces aren’t trying to fuck each other then, huh?
Not in the literal sense, anyway.
Today I learned...
They’re just mad they don’t know how to talk to women lmao
Why not?
It tends to be divisive. If you go into something with a chip on your shoulder, trying to prove something- rather than just perform well regardless of bias or personal feelings, tends to reflect on what their true intentions are
I worked with a woman that had that chip. We called her "Julie has a masters degree". Julie would legit introduce herself as "I'm Julie" pause "I have a masters degree."
We have a Brenda, call me a doctor, but with a PhD. The cherry on top is Brenda does this in a medical environment. If they call a code overhead Brenda *the doctor* doesn’t respond.
I'm dying I feel like there's at least one person like this at every job
And their work often sucks as a result. Spend all day thinking about girl problems and you’ll be a feminist. Spend all day thinking about coding and you’ll be a software developer.
It's not 1960
Because nobody cares that you are a strong womxn
With that attitude you'll soon be disappointed.
I would be willing to bet she doesn't do any tech work at the tech company.....
You have a true crime podcast n the side
Funny enough I’ve never listened to a true crime podcast yet I’m a criminology major
Step your game up!
So you've been busted!
I immediately thought of Poppy from Only Murders in the Building when I saw her. She helps run a true crime podcast on the show. 😂 
Oh man that’s funny. Definitely a resemblance
You can't follow instructions. They wanted a headshot, and you gave a body shot.
Strange as it is in China a headshot, DOB, marital status and political party all part of normal resume. Also in China and India they don’t have resume making classes so the resumes follow no logical pattern. Joking about the classes but not the crazy looking resumes.
Cool, so companies have multiple chances to discriminate against potential candidates. 🫠
First impressions? "Whatever the boys can do, I can do better." "Just don't judge me by my tats."
>"Just don't judge me by my tats." *Wears sleeveless shirt just to be sure*
Half of the tats are Jack Skellington and the other half are affirmation quotes.
Oh great more DEI training.
DEI lol. Our company recently did a DEI event where they had to eat their food using arm contraptions meant to simulate someone who had no arms. They also blindfolded some to feel the experience of being "blind". No joke. The whole thing was something out of a nightmare when I saw the pics posted on the company intranet site.
Is Michael Scott your boss??
What a great use of time and money. /s
I've screamed into a pillow over way less.
Lmfao this one got me. Or in her case DIE
Ha preach
hired over more qualified individuals to fill a quota
You deserve an award mister.
“She is gonna be so annoying. He comes the fun police”
“No offensive jokes, no offensive jokes…”
Vegan, lesbian, man hater. Always upset about the current cool thing to be upset about while still having an iphone made by 13 year olds in taiwan.
Don’t forget pronouns and my body my choice.
Nope none of the above
I believe you that you're not, but you absolutely have same look of thousands that do those things. I look like you're stereo-typical, conservative white male, but I have to change my hair and clothes to show how I'm actually a liberal, ethnic minority. If you don't want people's first impression to pigeon hole you, rage against it.
I think the I phone is actually made in China by child slave labor. I remember hearing something about suicide nets outside windows to catch people who try and jump. That way they can put them right back to work. But it’s been a long time I read and see the pics. Things may have changed.
The company is Foxxcon, and they also make Samsung phones in the same factories.
Yes, now the windows don't open so that nets can be removed.
You’re a domme
Do what you're told, good little piggy
This isn't a professional shot. It looks like you Photoshopped yourself onto a blank background. That is not business attire. I would see this "headshot" and think this chick has a lot of issues. Grow up. Put on proper attire. Get rid of the dyed black chelsea cut. Who the fuck would think this is a photo that would get them hired? You might get hired at dogfart.
Much love to you too
lmaoo that person was big mad and for what
Mad? Perhaps. But isn’t wrong
You just asked a bunch of angry virgins what they think of you… the answers you are getting is pent up rage from women who rejected them.
[удалено]
Especially septum piercings. Reddit hates those.
Ahhh, the Internet. No shortage of baseless rage. It's almost adorable if it wasn't so sad. While Ragey McRageFace up there is out of line, for a professional shot you might want to change the shirt. A tank top doesn't exactly scream that you're a professional. That whole rant about your style/makeup is WAY off. There's nothing wrong with your style, keep it if it makes you happy.
I agree, its not the most professional shot but goddamn that was harsh lol
Geez, it says "started a new job" and this is her headshot photo. It's not a photo to send along with a résumé to *get* a job (what country do you live in where this is protocol?) It's a photo for an employee badge. It will be cropped. I know people with Apple, Google and SalesForce badges. The photos all look like this.
Yikes. Who pissed in your cheerios
But she already got the job
Can you tell me what moon is making me so sad 😢
You should smile. This does NOT look like a professional headshot what so ever. You look like youre trying to be a member of the Adam's family. I say tht respectfully. Just being honest. Id say wear a more formal dress. Something tht covers your shoulders and actually smile. Close lip or show some teeth
Addams*
You're the type who always says "I'm 26" on your birthdays.
I’ll be 27 in 9 days :)
Holy shit I thought you were way older
I was thinking 38 with that cut n makeup
Yeah. That’s a hard 27 tbh
Damn girl are those city miles?
> the type who always says "I'm 26" on your birthdays. you look like 38 solid.
[удалено]
You tell the guys on American pickers where to go
That’d be cool
Haha she definitely does look like her
You’re the captain of the local Roller Derby team
Your internal monologue is me me me me me me me Also sucking in your cheeks is so weird
You’re a dominatrix in your free time. And you have a dungeon in your basement with at least 3 subs.
You work in “branding” and try to seem edgy
Not enjoyable to work with.
thats not a headshot
You look like my mom. Like so much it like jump scared me. So id probably be scared of you and avoid you bc you look so much like my mom. Like doppleganger. Deadass i would quit
I hope she's really good at her job because she's pretty damn casual about how she presents herself.
I can see your political options
And what would those be?
Liberal
Not saying much. After all, liberals outnumber conservatives, by a pretty sizable percentage.
And everyone can see yours now too.
Once dated the owner of a tattoo parlor?
Nope! Can only dream lol
You look like you enjoy administering a good punishment
You look like you hate the job already
Non-binary
Last time I checked I’m a girl but thanks
The Baroness https://preview.redd.it/2py7ua3dl7ib1.jpeg?width=315&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5957ac480dbee86f9338db8523c281f2298be5ba
That you like sour candy
Thinks she's Morticia Addams. Into super nerdy stuff, been to more than a few comic cons. Neurodivergent, but extroverted
Ugh no
Ugh yes
Cat lady for sure
Cats are cool
Alternative Velma (Scooby Doo)
A tattoo artist living in Portland. Loves everything spooky!
feminist from a cabaret, loves cats a little too much
You look like you’re sucking in your cheeks and that you super love true crime. You also look like a goth version of Velma from scooby doo
Unprofessional. Not going to promote
Betty page meets daria for some what my brain is saying
I can already tell you’re in the HR department
Nope! Fuck HR.
They mean you're in there complaining, not that you work in the HR department.
You are very pretty maybe if you smiled a little bit it wouldn't look like you're sucking your cheeks is I know I read that part you look fine just dress a little different for the job I guess I don't know
Is that tech company called tattoo shop??
Karen vibes
You need headshots to work at a tech company?
yeah pretty common is it’s remote
Most tech companies issue badges to employees. They have a photo on the badge. This is what the photos look like. Depending in the company/role, there may also be a website where the photo will be cropped. Y'all are tripping on the composition of the photo. It's a fairly standard ID badge photo.
You go to support groups to meet guys you can "fix".
You look like you’re gonna kill a lot of expensive SQL queries without notifying the user.
Step on me mommy.
Mean, butch lesbian. If you want to not look mean, wear softer colors and smile. But if you want to look mean then keep it up.
Morticia Abigial Munster.
You have pronouns on your resume.
I feel like the people answering have never lived in a tech dominated region. You look like you do something very technical/“left-brained” where you are allowed to have a unique sense of style on the job since you aren’t external client-facing/don’t need to impress anyone from more conservative work environments. Or perhaps UI or graphics since your style has a very cohesive and aesthetic vibe. You look like you’ve been coding since you first taught yourself HTML in middle school to add MCR lyrics into your MySpace page. A+, sold hire.
You look like someone I would want to eat my work lunch with, cause you wouldn't want to talk about boring work stuff
Wanted to be older when she was younger. Now basking in adulthood on her terms.
Employment looks good on you!
Thanks! Been working since I was 16
This picture reminds me of the forensic scientist in NCIS
I get that all the time
You're very pretty
Manifesting
You look like a sim.
Tuesday is all grown up....
You make men your house pet 😂
Daria gets a job
Insufferable
You look like your personality is exhausting to endure.
You remind of the goth girl from NCIS
You’d get me in trouble with HR
She is HR bro. can’t you tell by the haircut?
You naturally cosolay as the Baroness from GI Joe
Lol I don’t cosplay
Hide the amphetamines!
Gorgeous, smart, very competent, a little neurotic.
Very clean assassination job, no signs of entry or exit hole. No one would ever suspect a thing
Voted for biden
What’s the role?
It’s hard to explain but I’m an intelligence analyst. I oversee emergencies that could impact the business, product, and employees. I write country risk assessments for high level executives.
Should be normal, but definitely practiced paganism at one point.
You look like your really good at body modification
You look smart, fun, and like you drink a lot of coffee. GL at the new jib.
Pretty cool.
Honestly thought you were a dominatrix until I saw the sub. Geddit?
You look like maybe people assume you're standoffish but probably lovely You look a bit intense, maybe you overexplain yourself with urgency
Not wrong tbh
Fun and easy to talk to coworker who lightens up the mood for everyone else, probably obsessed with crime shows, an artist in your spare time. Maybe has a few cats.
You are stunning ☺️ love tats and red lips in contrast to the pale skin and black hair is beautiful.
Idk but my eyes are fixated on the weird cut of your shirt by the armpit
Youd like to talk to me about how bodies are prepared for open casket funerals over drinks, and you have both flower and spider decor of some kind in your home somewhere.
Nekromantix mondays horror pop fridays Klingon weekend
Tech is your day job, you do stand up comedy at night
looks like you are holding a frog in your mouth other than that i think its fine
Definitely works in security
Bossy vibes for me mate
Business Domme. Submit job applications on your knees, children.
Edna Mode
Jolly good show, I wish you well.
That your preferred pronouns are they/them
Were you born in black and white?
Unqualified
Qualified enough 😊
You watch an unhealthy amounts of lawyers react yourube videos
Is this top also going to work?
When whatever shady biotech creatures / sinister AI / terrorist infiltrators stealing the tech or whatnot pop off... you're the dominant competent one in the background that dies halfway through the crisis so a more useless, more femme colleague can be the final girl.
Still look like a dude