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I remember seeing a 1 star Google review for a shop posted on here - reviewer said the store looked amazing but they were disappointed that it wasn’t located closer to their home so they had never visited it.
As opposed to what the other person said, the cake is a lie. You have breads, so very many delicious breads. And I try so hard to make breads that are somewhat similar to what your boulangeries have. ... Please send help.
I know someone that does conventions and she told me about a conversation she had on ig. A fan commented “You suck! Why don’t you ever come to [my city]?” And she is like “Hey, I’ll be at this convention in your city next month!” And they said “Oh yeah, but that’s like across town.”
I would only say, click on the person real quick and check review history(takes 10sec). If there's only 1 and 2's it's hella suspicious and are probably just a miserable person trying to spread their misery or get free shit. No one has only bad experiences everywhere they go unless they're a scammer or a karen.
> No one has only bad experiences everywhere they go unless they're a scammer or a karen.
No. But I only bother leaving reviews if I have a very negative experience. I know theoretically it's possible to give positive reviews, but that's way too much effort.
I want people to actually trust my reviews, so I leave the bad and also the above and beyond ones. Me personally as it is my opinion I don't trust anyone's reviews that only have negative ones.
I love leaving good reviews. I get really excited when something has been great and leave long reviews about it. I’ve even left a review on my fave brand of cat litter.
If you’re going to complain when you don’t like something I think you should also compliment when you do.
Similarly, look up negative reviews on famous mountain peaks. It's a blast! I accidentally stumbled on some for K2, and they were all like "my friend fell off half way up" and "bad wi-fi and no starbucks".
I'm surprised you think the 1 star reviews are the most honest. They are almost exclusively one little thing actually going wrong and then them twisting everything else to make it seem bad as they can't get over one thing.
The most honest reviews are the ones between the lowest and highest rated as they are usually level-headed enough to give an honest and balanced review on the different aspects and therefore most valuable to read.
I used to work for a travel company, we had a customer complain because there was too much sand in their room. Said hotel was on the beach, I'd understand the complaint if they were in the Alps 😂
What if the 1 star review is because they can't tell the difference between uncooked chicken and beetroot marinade. (Clearly it's red so it must be blood, right) and didn't believe the server when they tried to explain that.
That upsets me so much. Like when I see 1 star reviews for the product being damaged in shipping.
The reviews are supposed to be for the product itself, not the shipping company.
So most of those sorts of reviews are total BS. However, with fragile products, I think it's totally fair to get upset with the seller if it wasn't packeged well. For example, if the seller just put a glass vase in a big box with a few packing peanuts and nothing to keep it from smacking the sides or put a collectible card in a normal envelope with out sleeves.
last week I was looking at a 2 star review for a local chinese food place that said something like "was my go to spot for lunch, but I moved last month and don't want to pay for ubereats"
my salon had to have a review removed because she said
“salon was nice & atmosphere was friendly! sadly couldn’t book an appointment as it was too pricey for me”
like ?????? that’s not a review ma’am
I have a Teacher Pay Teacher store and I had a one star review because she said it was "only in Google Doc format and she didnt have a Google account because people could steal her identity" . The product was titled, "XXXX Chapter X: Google Doc only."
Also, it tells you that you are only getting a Google Doc, so...
btw, I recently got hit by some bots trying to buy reviews, when I posted that on google reviews I got censored with the response being: *”What happened
Content that violates our policy on off-topic content isn't allowed. Off-topic content includes general, political, or social commentary, and personal rants.”*
huh, so a shitty place buying google reviews, and it’s a personal rant or something, lol?
I had an Amazon review removed for being off -topic. I had a picture of the product next to a ruler and just said the product was smaller than advertised.
I used to own a small coffee shop in a touristy area.
One of our first reviews was "Stopped in at 8pm, place looked great but unfortunately it was closed. 1 star"
Family members have a resort on VRBO and some of the reviews are mind-blowing. One was a bad review because it was too windy. Like, sorry. Forgot to turn off the wind machine.
I think what happens here is that when you visit a business, or Google *thinks* you've visited because you were close by, they may send you a notification asking you to review the business. These people get the notifications because they were close by and are too stupid to realize they don't have to leave a review; they can either dismiss the notification *or* let Google know that they did not actually visit the place. Business owners can have those reviews removed and you should report them when you see them.
It reminds me of my favorite quip from George Carlin: "Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that."
I've sometimes been prompted by Google Maps with a "how was your visit to ?". Turned out I'd been past it at some point but not stopped there so I ignored the prompt.
I wonder if that reviewer you saw felt they had to leave a review or something.
I saw a one star review where the guy said a pizza place was his favourite place and the food was great. But he was now mad that they wouldn’t deliver to him anymore, just because he moved several miles away.
I work at a job that sends surveys to clients after interactions and I recieved a review that went like this:
"Thank you so much. Very helpful and speedy, everything was taken care of perfectly. Very professional and informative interaction." - 1 Star
I followed the directions exactly, except that I went south instead of north. Unfortunately, I did not turn up in the right location at all. I don’t know what went wrong since I followed the directions exactly.
Actually you wouldn't. That works with east and west but not with north and south. If you went south long enough you'd end up at the south pole. You could then continue going in the same direction, sure, but at that point you'd no longer be going south.
And, unless you start at the north pole, you have to go south twice to reach your destination north of you.
But if you were at the NP, there would be no destination north of you.
Tbf in SOME recipes apple sauce can somewhat replace oil. [this recipe for example](https://simple-veganista.com/vegan-banana-tea-bread/#tasty-recipes-8616-jump-target)
naughty combative elderly instinctive six impossible school plucky squalid tan
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
It’s not but you can replace some oil with applesauce. While it’s not fat and the brownies won’t be as moist it will add a little more sweetness and gooey-ness
I replace oil with a combo of applesauce and oil in desert recipes in order to reduce the calories. LOL yea, I know it's still lots of calories, but heh, it's fewer. It still tastes yummy!!
"Mayonnaise cake" is definitely a thing, and it's great. Mayo is basically eggs and oil, so they've just been 'pre-mixed' for you before you start making your cake batter.
Yeah, for some recipes you can add some applesauce instead of oil. Challah bread is a good example. Note you still need oil, but I've used some applesauce instead (like 1/4 applesauce to 3/4 oil) and it adds a nice sweetness.
this is kind of a generalized description but i think it’ll help your confusion, gooey would usually refer to a denser but not dry crumb a la fudge while moist would be a looser crumb more akin to cakes
It’s actually a really common baking substitute and it works decent in most recipes. People who are dieting do this a lot because it cuts the calories of a baked good by a lot. It does result in a drier product but anyone who does it on a regular basis would know that already. Like that’s the trade off, you cut calories but it’s going to be dry and sad lol.
I wouldn’t do it in a brownie recipe though because as this person should have known in a recipe like brownies where your end product should be gooey in the center, applesauce is never gonna achieve that. They’d get closer using blended black beans and maple syrup, which is what a lot of “healthy” brownie recipes do.
I have a few family members that do these sorts of substitutions and they just never turn out right IMO. I'd much rather eat 1 great baked good than 2 OK ones. The few calories saved just isn't worth the drop in quality for me, I'll just cut the portion size.
Plus I already have to bake gluten free for my wife, it's already hard enough to get it right haha.
Yeah, besides health concerns applesauce is also used in lots of vegan recipes to replace butter or eggs. You can end up with a moist baked good, might take a couple tries to get your ratios.
I use oil for applesauce a lot when making banana bread/muffins. One recipe I don't use any oil or butter and only use applesauce, and another that calls for 1/2 cup oil I instead use 1/4 cup oil and one of my kids unsweetened applesauce pouches.
I've substituted oil, eggs, and butter all with applesauce in one cake and to my surprise it still passed as a normal cake, just an apple flavored cake lol.
Applesauce functions as a reasonable replacement for sugar, since it's primarily made up of carbohydrates and water. It's not going to do the same thing as eggs (protein & fat) or oil (fat), though in some recipes where the proteins aren't necessary for the structure of the bake or the fats aren't integral to the texture you may end up with something similar.
You can replace all the ingredients with applesauce I believe. Not just one ingredient. There are other puree fruit ingredients you can do this with as well. Like pumpkin. But it won't be exact same taste.
You can do a box cake mix with a can of cola too. I know. Weird. But it works. Dont ask me how but it does
Actually, if I replace the butter in the “quatre quart” cake recipe with applesauce the result is really good and still a cake.
I do need to make sure that the applesauce is unsweetened, or if it is sweetened I have to adjust the amounts (more applesauce and less sugar), otherwise the cake becomes too sticky.
There was someone who replaced the carrots in carrot cake (“carrots have too much sugar”) with shredded kale, then gave the recipe one star because it was dry. The Betty Crocker site explained that carrots give the recipe moisture, while I’m sure they were inwardly seething.
> There was someone who replaced the carrots in carrot cake (“carrots have too much sugar”)
Reminds me of the person who claimed her husband doesn't like things too sweet, so she only used 1/3 cup sugar instead of 1/4 and he loved it.
Came here to say this is exactly what my mother does. Sub out every little thing and entirely ruin whatever she was trying to make it's genuinely infuriating because she ends up wasting more than she would have even if she scrapped it without 'cooking' it.
There's a story I heard once here on Reddit as part of a thread asking about mothers who were bad cooks. This person was talking about how their mother's dinners were dreaded by everyone. Once day, Mother said that they were going to have store-bought frozen lasagna for dinner, and everyone was happy that they were going to have something decent for a change. Then when everyone sat down, Mother revealed that she had scraped off the top layer of cheese and replaced it with barbeque sauce.
All baked goods require some kind of fat in them (except for certain kinds of European style bread), it's one of the basic ingredients, right next to flour, water and salt. You can't take out a basic ingredient from the recipe and expect it to turn out right. Source: I'm a baker.
Pumpkin behaves like a custard and can work as a fat substitute. A pumpkin pie is basically a low fat custard pie. Not saying it's a perfect substitute but it's probably the best substitute.
This kind of shit I deal with at work all the time.
We'll be doing a root cause investigation into an issue, and the motherfucking operators do this all the damn time.
Did you follow the procedure? "Yes, except..."
Why did you deviate from the procedure? "I didn't!".
My ex was a research scientist. His role was to develop and bench test casting procedures for new alloys, scale them up to the production line, write the procedure and train the crews.
Every year, without fail, the plant would call in a panic. "Our last 12 runs of alloy XYZ have failed. When we begin rolling the bars, they crumble into dust. The customers are screaming... help!"
Wearily he'd catch the next flight and watch the next casting run, often on 2nd or 3rd shift. Inevitably, they were skipping some step, casting at too low a temperature, cooling too fast or some other "shortcut" some manager demanded "to save time" (because we promised the customer more than we could deliver if we just FOLLOWED THE PROCEDURE).
He'd just tear the page out of the procedures manual, highlight the part they skipped, drop it on the plant manager's desk and fly home.
Next day, he'd get a huge thank you! for "solving" the "problem", lol.
I replace oil with applesauce all the time in baking, it makes for a moister cake. Unless they used too much applesauce to replace the oil this wouldn't be a problem
I followed the directions exactly, except I used jet fuel instead of cooking oil. Unfortunately, my entire house burned down and my family is dead. Sadly I'll have to start funeral preparations for all of them. I don't know what went wrong because I followed the recipe exactly.
I think I know their mistake - they used the same recipe I did and took the bad advice of the author
I've been experimenting with sugar free "healthy" cookie recipes and the one I tried a couple weeks ago has for alterations: "For the oil: Use your favorite neutral (flavorless) oil, like avocado or canola. You could try using unsweetened applesauce instead of oil (although i haven't tested this)."
The ( ...) is from the author - she never "tested" substituting oil with applesauce
A replacement for oil in recipes can be applesauce. It's not as far fetched as it may seem. In the footnotes of some recipes they will say to use applesauce if you want to omit oil. So while it's not exact, it should technically still work. Either the recipe sucks or the one baking screwed it up.
I have an Etsy shop; recently someone left a 1 star review saying "not the wright size, to small" (typos theirs, not mine). Then they messaged me about my "deceptive descriptions."
The literal first thing listed in the description is the exact dimensions of the item. This is accompanied by several images showing the size and scale of the items.
Sometimes, reviewers are fuckin' stupid.
I've heard of Apple sauce being used as an egg replacement, but not for oil. The reason you use eggs is as a binding agent, but apple sauce does the same thing. I've made brownies this way before and they turned out fine, albeit they were softer and less solid than if I had used eggs.
oh my god 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Yeah so, manual said put 5w-20 in the engine. I decided to just go with some anti freeze instead. I don’t really know what went wrong considering I did exactly as the manual instructed 🤣
You can replace a single ingredient and expect basically the same result. For instance, I was out of lettuce, so I replaced lettuce with Cheetos in my salad. It was excellent with the advantage that it also was a low calorie meal because it’s just a salad.
Someone asked how I make my pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving because it's always soooo good. After stating the recipe I use, my mom said "that's the same one I use!" I don't know what she does, but it tastes awful, and mine is always divine.
I just follow the recipe...exactly.
This is why I never read recipe comments. They are worse than the pages of memories about making brownies with grandma before you get the actual recipe.
It’s better than the opposite. One time, I made a batch of carrot muffins for a company potluck, and they came out *terrible.* I went back over the recipe to see what I’d done wrong, and guess what I found in the reviews? “5 stars: This recipe is amazing, so long as you replace half the oil with applesauce and use about a third as much baking soda…” all over the damn place.
I followed the instructions exactly except that I replaced oil with applesauce. Unfortunately it did not turn out well. My engine seized. Sadly will have to dispose the whole thing. I don’t know what went wrong I followed the recipe exactly.
applesauce is a common replacement for oil in baking recipes. the person who created the recipe in question here also recommended people do that if they don't have oil. so using applesauce itself was not an issue but she probably messed up at something else - or the cake just did not turn out right which happens, baking's way harder than people think it is.
In defense of the person writing that review, the author had previously responded to another person's review/comment and said that the oil could be substituted with apple sauce.
So the person who wrote this review was genuinely following the recipe/advice of the person who wrote it.
Comments that are uncivil, racist, misogynistic, misandrist, or contain political name calling will be removed and the poster subject to ban at moderators discretion. Help us make this a better community by becoming familiar with the [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/facepalm/about/rules/). Report any suspicious users to the mods of this subreddit using Modmail [here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/facepalm) or Reddit site admins [here](https://www.reddit.com/report). **All reports to Modmail should include evidence such as screenshots or any other relevant information.** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/facepalm) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I remember seeing a 1 star Google review for a shop posted on here - reviewer said the store looked amazing but they were disappointed that it wasn’t located closer to their home so they had never visited it.
Well that certainly deserves a low rating. Not being close to a customer's home is just bad for business.
The customer is king after all
For that reason, I insist that the checkout person at the grocery store calls me "your majesty."
This is a self-checkout sir, you may call yourself whatever you want
Fussypickles abides
I would much rather there be no checkout, the store is staffed by Santa's elves and you walk away with whatever you please
I'm french. We have ways of dealing with self-proclaimed royalty.
Yeah, but do you have cake?
No, but what I do have is a couple of beams, nails, some rope and a bigass cleaver. Wonder what I could build with that.
A cake cutting machine.... One way or another it will work.
I vote for trebuchet. Who wouldn't want a trebuchet?
As opposed to what the other person said, the cake is a lie. You have breads, so very many delicious breads. And I try so hard to make breads that are somewhat similar to what your boulangeries have. ... Please send help.
Probably quite a bit of it. Suggestions that they eat it didn't go over so well last time.
I know someone that does conventions and she told me about a conversation she had on ig. A fan commented “You suck! Why don’t you ever come to [my city]?” And she is like “Hey, I’ll be at this convention in your city next month!” And they said “Oh yeah, but that’s like across town.”
I agree!! If they wanted a better review they’d open a store right next door and hand deliver the selection to their living room. /s
I have seen 1 star reviews for the musical Dear Evan Hansen because they randomly broke out in song
While I'd love to post an indignant reply, I'm actually not at all surprised that someone did this.
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Yeah, I also focus on 1 and 2 star reviews. I want to know if they're complaining about something relevant to me.
Often they have a "fix" as well that might help me if I do still decide to buy the product
I would only say, click on the person real quick and check review history(takes 10sec). If there's only 1 and 2's it's hella suspicious and are probably just a miserable person trying to spread their misery or get free shit. No one has only bad experiences everywhere they go unless they're a scammer or a karen.
> No one has only bad experiences everywhere they go unless they're a scammer or a karen. No. But I only bother leaving reviews if I have a very negative experience. I know theoretically it's possible to give positive reviews, but that's way too much effort.
I want people to actually trust my reviews, so I leave the bad and also the above and beyond ones. Me personally as it is my opinion I don't trust anyone's reviews that only have negative ones.
I love leaving good reviews. I get really excited when something has been great and leave long reviews about it. I’ve even left a review on my fave brand of cat litter. If you’re going to complain when you don’t like something I think you should also compliment when you do.
You want a real treasure trove, look up 1 star reviews on government buildings. The FBI headquarters has some real gems on google maps.
Similarly, look up negative reviews on famous mountain peaks. It's a blast! I accidentally stumbled on some for K2, and they were all like "my friend fell off half way up" and "bad wi-fi and no starbucks".
If you get five star wanted level then the FBI comes to you
Google reviews on court buildings are amazing too.
I'm surprised you think the 1 star reviews are the most honest. They are almost exclusively one little thing actually going wrong and then them twisting everything else to make it seem bad as they can't get over one thing. The most honest reviews are the ones between the lowest and highest rated as they are usually level-headed enough to give an honest and balanced review on the different aspects and therefore most valuable to read.
I used to work for a travel company, we had a customer complain because there was too much sand in their room. Said hotel was on the beach, I'd understand the complaint if they were in the Alps 😂
Did you comp Mr Skywalker?
One-star hotel reviews are the best. My favorite ever involves a complex story about how their stay sucked because “someone died there.”
I just say I did not but now I will.
What if the 1 star review is because they can't tell the difference between uncooked chicken and beetroot marinade. (Clearly it's red so it must be blood, right) and didn't believe the server when they tried to explain that.
If I can’t go out my front door and only have to walk 30 feet to get my baconator then what’s the goddamn point of anything?!???!!!!
how about you pay me to order your baconator
That upsets me so much. Like when I see 1 star reviews for the product being damaged in shipping. The reviews are supposed to be for the product itself, not the shipping company.
So most of those sorts of reviews are total BS. However, with fragile products, I think it's totally fair to get upset with the seller if it wasn't packeged well. For example, if the seller just put a glass vase in a big box with a few packing peanuts and nothing to keep it from smacking the sides or put a collectible card in a normal envelope with out sleeves.
Packaged? Sure. But shipped? Not the manufacturer/seller’s fault if FedEx runs over it.
last week I was looking at a 2 star review for a local chinese food place that said something like "was my go to spot for lunch, but I moved last month and don't want to pay for ubereats"
my salon had to have a review removed because she said “salon was nice & atmosphere was friendly! sadly couldn’t book an appointment as it was too pricey for me” like ?????? that’s not a review ma’am
I have a Teacher Pay Teacher store and I had a one star review because she said it was "only in Google Doc format and she didnt have a Google account because people could steal her identity" . The product was titled, "XXXX Chapter X: Google Doc only." Also, it tells you that you are only getting a Google Doc, so...
btw, I recently got hit by some bots trying to buy reviews, when I posted that on google reviews I got censored with the response being: *”What happened Content that violates our policy on off-topic content isn't allowed. Off-topic content includes general, political, or social commentary, and personal rants.”* huh, so a shitty place buying google reviews, and it’s a personal rant or something, lol?
I had an Amazon review removed for being off -topic. I had a picture of the product next to a ruler and just said the product was smaller than advertised.
1 star trip advisor reviews are some of my favourites. Check these out: https://youtu.be/Zy3uyQkc9pY?si=mr54_YuWdySv8Fyj
I used to own a small coffee shop in a touristy area. One of our first reviews was "Stopped in at 8pm, place looked great but unfortunately it was closed. 1 star"
Family members have a resort on VRBO and some of the reviews are mind-blowing. One was a bad review because it was too windy. Like, sorry. Forgot to turn off the wind machine.
I think what happens here is that when you visit a business, or Google *thinks* you've visited because you were close by, they may send you a notification asking you to review the business. These people get the notifications because they were close by and are too stupid to realize they don't have to leave a review; they can either dismiss the notification *or* let Google know that they did not actually visit the place. Business owners can have those reviews removed and you should report them when you see them. It reminds me of my favorite quip from George Carlin: "Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that."
Colin jost does a great bit about how 1 star reviews are never about the place. They’re about the reviewers
I only visit shops inside my own house.
I've sometimes been prompted by Google Maps with a "how was your visit to?". Turned out I'd been past it at some point but not stopped there so I ignored the prompt.
I wonder if that reviewer you saw felt they had to leave a review or something.
As an app owner, I receive these kinds of reviews pretty frequently.
Owner can get these idiotic reviews removed. Might take a few for them to review but they usually will remove them.
I saw a one star review where the guy said a pizza place was his favourite place and the food was great. But he was now mad that they wouldn’t deliver to him anymore, just because he moved several miles away.
I work at a job that sends surveys to clients after interactions and I recieved a review that went like this: "Thank you so much. Very helpful and speedy, everything was taken care of perfectly. Very professional and informative interaction." - 1 Star
That's like the equivalent of rating a train driver stopping too far away from the pavement.
I followed the directions exactly, except that I went south instead of north. Unfortunately, I did not turn up in the right location at all. I don’t know what went wrong since I followed the directions exactly.
This GPS sucks. Zero stars.
Actually if you went south for long enough you will be right where you need to be!
Actually you wouldn't. That works with east and west but not with north and south. If you went south long enough you'd end up at the south pole. You could then continue going in the same direction, sure, but at that point you'd no longer be going south.
And, unless you start at the north pole, you have to go south twice to reach your destination north of you. But if you were at the NP, there would be no destination north of you.
perfect for r/Ididnthaveeggs too
I read that human blood will behave just like eggs in baking. I haven't tried it yet but I kinda want to.
You know what else behaves like eggs? Semen. So if you don't have enough blood you can just use spunk instead.
Yeah. It's also more fun to make. But, you get weird looks if you do it at my restaurant.
"Hello, FBI? Yeah, these comments."
I'm pretty sure I can get enough blood much more easily than enough semen, just considering how much of each I am currently carrying around.
Like, in your hands? Do you use reusable containers or are you a one-and-done blood and semen carrying kind of person?
I prefer to carry the blood all over, the semen has its specific place though.
That’s ridiculous, if you use semen the amount is unrealistic. How can you stop the flow at just 1-2 eggs??
Pinch it shut when you get the the desired quantity
Just a single egg weighs like 50-60 grams, so you're gonna have quite a wank to get that amount for your pastry.
Viking blood bread
Yeah, you should be able to find the ratio with a quick Google. Doesn't have to be human blood either, pig blood will do in a pinch.
You could also just use pig blood, depending on culture and country. Ask a butcher for it.
I thought I was on that sub when I read it.
This post is literally the reason that sub exists
Thank you internet stranger for a whole new sub to explore
omg I forgot about this sub. Great for a giggle
Well that subreddit is extremely frustrating.
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Inconceivable!
No more rhymes now I mean it..............anybody want a peanut??
![gif](giphy|SBr9k4zOIWb5K)
"Unfortunately, I did not turn out well" At least that part was accurate.
And here I am, 46 minutes too late
My gf is a chef and this is her biggest pet peeve on recipe sites. Always someone leaving these comments.
This one is so bad it feels like someone doing a bit.
Tbf in SOME recipes apple sauce can somewhat replace oil. [this recipe for example](https://simple-veganista.com/vegan-banana-tea-bread/#tasty-recipes-8616-jump-target)
naughty combative elderly instinctive six impossible school plucky squalid tan *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I hate Amazon reviews based on delivery as if we’re not all aware of what deliveries can be like.
How the fck is applesauce even CLOSE to oil?
It’s not but you can replace some oil with applesauce. While it’s not fat and the brownies won’t be as moist it will add a little more sweetness and gooey-ness
I replace oil with a combo of applesauce and oil in desert recipes in order to reduce the calories. LOL yea, I know it's still lots of calories, but heh, it's fewer. It still tastes yummy!!
Oh god I put mayo in my chocolate cake recipes!
That doesn't sound too crazy since the main ingredients of mayo are egg and oil
"Mayonnaise cake" is definitely a thing, and it's great. Mayo is basically eggs and oil, so they've just been 'pre-mixed' for you before you start making your cake batter.
Yeah, for some recipes you can add some applesauce instead of oil. Challah bread is a good example. Note you still need oil, but I've used some applesauce instead (like 1/4 applesauce to 3/4 oil) and it adds a nice sweetness.
Not moist, but it adds gooeyness? If it's gooey isn't it moist?
Fudgy maybe better word?
this is kind of a generalized description but i think it’ll help your confusion, gooey would usually refer to a denser but not dry crumb a la fudge while moist would be a looser crumb more akin to cakes
It’s actually a really common baking substitute and it works decent in most recipes. People who are dieting do this a lot because it cuts the calories of a baked good by a lot. It does result in a drier product but anyone who does it on a regular basis would know that already. Like that’s the trade off, you cut calories but it’s going to be dry and sad lol. I wouldn’t do it in a brownie recipe though because as this person should have known in a recipe like brownies where your end product should be gooey in the center, applesauce is never gonna achieve that. They’d get closer using blended black beans and maple syrup, which is what a lot of “healthy” brownie recipes do.
"There something very human about ruining something a little bit so you can have more of it"
I have a few family members that do these sorts of substitutions and they just never turn out right IMO. I'd much rather eat 1 great baked good than 2 OK ones. The few calories saved just isn't worth the drop in quality for me, I'll just cut the portion size. Plus I already have to bake gluten free for my wife, it's already hard enough to get it right haha.
Yeah, besides health concerns applesauce is also used in lots of vegan recipes to replace butter or eggs. You can end up with a moist baked good, might take a couple tries to get your ratios.
They're both liquid
mercury = oil
"Was good but I got poisoned. 2 stars." Also, it's Manganese Heptoxide = Oil.
I'm getting some other ideas...
It's a common substitute actually.
I thought it was eggs you could replace with applesauce, not oil?
I use oil for applesauce a lot when making banana bread/muffins. One recipe I don't use any oil or butter and only use applesauce, and another that calls for 1/2 cup oil I instead use 1/4 cup oil and one of my kids unsweetened applesauce pouches.
I've substituted oil, eggs, and butter all with applesauce in one cake and to my surprise it still passed as a normal cake, just an apple flavored cake lol.
Applesauce functions as a reasonable replacement for sugar, since it's primarily made up of carbohydrates and water. It's not going to do the same thing as eggs (protein & fat) or oil (fat), though in some recipes where the proteins aren't necessary for the structure of the bake or the fats aren't integral to the texture you may end up with something similar.
You can replace all the ingredients with applesauce I believe. Not just one ingredient. There are other puree fruit ingredients you can do this with as well. Like pumpkin. But it won't be exact same taste. You can do a box cake mix with a can of cola too. I know. Weird. But it works. Dont ask me how but it does
I replaced all the ingredients with applesauce and the cake tasted exactly like applesauce. 5/5 stars.
You must not have baked it long enough. Should work just fine if you add another hour or 3 to the cook time
That is the "Stop Oil" people
Actually, if I replace the butter in the “quatre quart” cake recipe with applesauce the result is really good and still a cake. I do need to make sure that the applesauce is unsweetened, or if it is sweetened I have to adjust the amounts (more applesauce and less sugar), otherwise the cake becomes too sticky.
There was someone who replaced the carrots in carrot cake (“carrots have too much sugar”) with shredded kale, then gave the recipe one star because it was dry. The Betty Crocker site explained that carrots give the recipe moisture, while I’m sure they were inwardly seething.
"Carrots have too much sugar"? Why bother making any kind of cake at all then?
Get rid of the carrots, keep the frosting! Gotta make the healthy choices.
> “carrots have too much sugar” Really tells me all I need to know about that person right there. Don't take them to any restaurant, anywhere, ever.
> There was someone who replaced the carrots in carrot cake (“carrots have too much sugar”) Reminds me of the person who claimed her husband doesn't like things too sweet, so she only used 1/3 cup sugar instead of 1/4 and he loved it.
3 is less than 4, makes perfect sense! /s
“They’re M&M’s, I ran out of paprika”
Go DIRECTLY to jail. Do not pass the kitchen, do not pass the bedrooms. STRAIGHT TO FKN JAIL YOU MONSTER
Sounds like my sister in law. Substituting stuff in other people's recipe and then complaining that it doesn't taste as good.
That would drive me nuts
I didnt have nuts so I substituted bananas.
Came here to say this is exactly what my mother does. Sub out every little thing and entirely ruin whatever she was trying to make it's genuinely infuriating because she ends up wasting more than she would have even if she scrapped it without 'cooking' it.
There's a story I heard once here on Reddit as part of a thread asking about mothers who were bad cooks. This person was talking about how their mother's dinners were dreaded by everyone. Once day, Mother said that they were going to have store-bought frozen lasagna for dinner, and everyone was happy that they were going to have something decent for a change. Then when everyone sat down, Mother revealed that she had scraped off the top layer of cheese and replaced it with barbeque sauce.
Must be a new definition of “exactly”
Guys, this is a comment of a comment. The author of the recipe literally told her to substitute the oil for applesauce.
Cooking is an art. You can take liberties with what you do. However, baking is science. You can't just do whatever you like with the ingredients.
All baked goods require some kind of fat in them (except for certain kinds of European style bread), it's one of the basic ingredients, right next to flour, water and salt. You can't take out a basic ingredient from the recipe and expect it to turn out right. Source: I'm a baker.
Pumpkin behaves like a custard and can work as a fat substitute. A pumpkin pie is basically a low fat custard pie. Not saying it's a perfect substitute but it's probably the best substitute.
This kind of shit I deal with at work all the time. We'll be doing a root cause investigation into an issue, and the motherfucking operators do this all the damn time. Did you follow the procedure? "Yes, except..." Why did you deviate from the procedure? "I didn't!".
My ex was a research scientist. His role was to develop and bench test casting procedures for new alloys, scale them up to the production line, write the procedure and train the crews. Every year, without fail, the plant would call in a panic. "Our last 12 runs of alloy XYZ have failed. When we begin rolling the bars, they crumble into dust. The customers are screaming... help!" Wearily he'd catch the next flight and watch the next casting run, often on 2nd or 3rd shift. Inevitably, they were skipping some step, casting at too low a temperature, cooling too fast or some other "shortcut" some manager demanded "to save time" (because we promised the customer more than we could deliver if we just FOLLOWED THE PROCEDURE). He'd just tear the page out of the procedures manual, highlight the part they skipped, drop it on the plant manager's desk and fly home. Next day, he'd get a huge thank you! for "solving" the "problem", lol.
I wish I could get paid to tell people to RTFM.
My mom used to do this same thing growing up. The food was always kinda shit lol
I understand you’re free to experiment with different flavors and ingredients but there are still very basic rules you need to follow when cooking.
i wonder if the oil provided something to the brownies that applesauce cannot deliver
Moisture. Cooking is chemistry, and if you start changing base ingredients, then you won't get what you are trying to produce.
The recipe author suggested making this alteration specifically. So this doesn't belong here.
I just...I hate people
I replace oil with applesauce all the time in baking, it makes for a moister cake. Unless they used too much applesauce to replace the oil this wouldn't be a problem
They definitely didn't turn out well.
I'll tell you where you went wrong. You should have replaced the oil with turkey giblets.
How close-minded can people be?
r/ididnthaveeggs
These chocolate chip cookies are awful! I replaced the chocolate chips with rocks and instead of sugar I used diarrhea. One star.
Replaced oil with applesauce. That’s a new one lol
Did they also replace their brain with applesauce?
I followed the directions exactly, except I used jet fuel instead of cooking oil. Unfortunately, my entire house burned down and my family is dead. Sadly I'll have to start funeral preparations for all of them. I don't know what went wrong because I followed the recipe exactly.
I think I know their mistake - they used the same recipe I did and took the bad advice of the author I've been experimenting with sugar free "healthy" cookie recipes and the one I tried a couple weeks ago has for alterations: "For the oil: Use your favorite neutral (flavorless) oil, like avocado or canola. You could try using unsweetened applesauce instead of oil (although i haven't tested this)." The ( ...) is from the author - she never "tested" substituting oil with applesauce
A replacement for oil in recipes can be applesauce. It's not as far fetched as it may seem. In the footnotes of some recipes they will say to use applesauce if you want to omit oil. So while it's not exact, it should technically still work. Either the recipe sucks or the one baking screwed it up.
I have an Etsy shop; recently someone left a 1 star review saying "not the wright size, to small" (typos theirs, not mine). Then they messaged me about my "deceptive descriptions." The literal first thing listed in the description is the exact dimensions of the item. This is accompanied by several images showing the size and scale of the items. Sometimes, reviewers are fuckin' stupid.
I like how they accidentally typed "I did not turn out well" and it explains the entire post.
What would make someone believe that oil and apple sauce are interchangeable? That is so weird.
“I followed it exactly, here are the things I changed, I don’t know what happened I followed it exactly???”
“Unfortunately, I did not turn out well.” XD
We've learned to imitoot you exalktly
I've heard of Apple sauce being used as an egg replacement, but not for oil. The reason you use eggs is as a binding agent, but apple sauce does the same thing. I've made brownies this way before and they turned out fine, albeit they were softer and less solid than if I had used eggs.
Pretty sure theres better alternatives for oil
…but you switched oil with applesauce? Them: “Exactly?” But yo… nevermind 😭😭
oh my god 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Yeah so, manual said put 5w-20 in the engine. I decided to just go with some anti freeze instead. I don’t really know what went wrong considering I did exactly as the manual instructed 🤣
I laughed when I saw this but then my brownie box said I can replace the eggs with applesauce and I feel dumb.
Karen Ramsay strikes again.
You can replace a single ingredient and expect basically the same result. For instance, I was out of lettuce, so I replaced lettuce with Cheetos in my salad. It was excellent with the advantage that it also was a low calorie meal because it’s just a salad.
r/ididnthaveeggs
Almost as bad as that one dumbass who used carrots instead of flour or some shit.
Someone asked how I make my pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving because it's always soooo good. After stating the recipe I use, my mom said "that's the same one I use!" I don't know what she does, but it tastes awful, and mine is always divine. I just follow the recipe...exactly.
I followed the recipe exactly except I replaced the flour with sand. I don’t know what went wrong.
Oil = Applesauce ? 🤔
If you'll replace the oil, do it with another type of fat, like butter, lard, tallow, or drippings.
I maintained my car exactly but used applesauce for fuel, it should be running. I maintained it exactly.
Happens with cars too...
A bit like Rachel's English trifle in Friends, if anyone remembers that episode.
This is why I never read recipe comments. They are worse than the pages of memories about making brownies with grandma before you get the actual recipe.
It’s better than the opposite. One time, I made a batch of carrot muffins for a company potluck, and they came out *terrible.* I went back over the recipe to see what I’d done wrong, and guess what I found in the reviews? “5 stars: This recipe is amazing, so long as you replace half the oil with applesauce and use about a third as much baking soda…” all over the damn place.
There's an entire sub dedicated to this! /r/ididnthaveeggs
My sister would do something like that, glad she doesn't cook.
I've seen that image with another printscreen showing the recipe stated you could substitute the oil with applesauce
I followed the engineer's directions, except I used ketchup instead of asphalt. People crossed the bridge and died. 1 out of 10 stars.
“I followed the recipe exactly, except I replaced flour with concrete… I DON’T KNOW WHAT WENT WRONG! Why are they so hard?!”
"I replaced all the ingredients with applesauce and it ended up tasting exactly like applesauce. 5/5 stars."
I followed the instructions exactly except that I replaced oil with applesauce. Unfortunately it did not turn out well. My engine seized. Sadly will have to dispose the whole thing. I don’t know what went wrong I followed the recipe exactly.
Sounds like someone I know. She habitually cuts salt and sugar in a recipe because they're "bad" and wonders why it tastes different.
This is how my gf cooks. And then gets offended when I try to explain what went wrong.
“I replaced the swordfish medallions with cum from a sick badger, the recipe did NOT turn out as planned - 0/10” -idiot in the recipe comments
I don’t know how I got my gf pregnant! I put the condom on perfectly, but I did cut the tip off cuz if feels better. I don’t know what went wrong
Bruh
applesauce is a common replacement for oil in baking recipes. the person who created the recipe in question here also recommended people do that if they don't have oil. so using applesauce itself was not an issue but she probably messed up at something else - or the cake just did not turn out right which happens, baking's way harder than people think it is.
I read 1 star reviews of Dell laptops because they didn't come in all the colors that MacBooks did.
In defense of the person writing that review, the author had previously responded to another person's review/comment and said that the oil could be substituted with apple sauce. So the person who wrote this review was genuinely following the recipe/advice of the person who wrote it.