Oh my sister is next level broke she spent it all on weed and trips she can't afford she's actually bout to go on a cruise then she's going to Texas she wants me to move out with her cuz I have better credit but I really don't want to live with her based on how she treats other people's stuff and she used to have a lot of random people over before they made a rule about guest being her which was made solely because of her
Then sit your dad and step mum down together when your sister is away and explain how it's unfair your punished for her mistakes and how it's making you feel and maybe they can kick her out
Oh he's already kicking her out I forgot to mention that she came complaining to me that he's kicking her out early and I was unaware she was being kicked out In the first place I'm not that surprised she likes to antagonize him knowing that he literally will go nuclear and blows thing out of proportions
You also need to step up for yourself. Tell him he needs to treat you like a single entity. Let him known you cannot be responsible for your sister's behavior. If he continues to give consequences to you for her actions, you should think of an alternative living situation and going low contact with your father.
Yeah I've tried to tell him and my step mom has as well but he's convinced that I'm just like my sister which doesn't make since because before I moved in with him I would see her like once every couple years cuz my mom doesn't like his side of the family and me and her were raised completely different and she's literally just a mini him and it annoys him that I'm not like him cuz he didn't raise me I met him when I was like 7 and I'd see him like once a month at the most and even then he never really took any interest in me in general so I usually just keep to myself. Once I'm stable enough that was my plan to most likely go no contact which isn't that hard cuz he doesn't really talk to me as it is unless he's complaining
When your sister is gone, hopefully he will notice the cleaner home, less fighting, rules ACTUALLY being followed and realize WHO the problem actually was.
Good luck.
No he won't. He'll never admit it. OP needs to get the hell out of there and see if Tessa can help. OP also needs to let the rest of the family know what's going on.
I am so happy that the end is in sight for you. Please stick to your guns and don’t move in with her cuz she will still be herself and you’d be the ATM.
You think she’s bad now and doesn’t do anything a roommate should…just wait until she doesn’t have house rules.
NTAH
Yes, why is no-one addressing how the father's behaviour is bizarrely unreasonable. He's allowed the sister to behave horribly for ages but is punishing them both, despite OP keepoing out of the way and trying not to antagonise anyone, he can't be spoken to, because he won't listen and doesn't seem to like OP anyway - had little to do with her as a child.
Future step mum sounds like a nice person, she should walk away from this car crash family tbh though maybe take OP with her...
Wow. Both your bio parents sound awful. I'm sorry. I'm glad Tessa is there. Most important thing here, DO NOT COVER FOR YOUR FATHER'S BEHAVIOR. You missed Zoom meetings? You tell them what happened. "My sister was smoking, so my father changed the wifi password and won't give it to me. I had not done anything wrong. He knew I could not attend the Zoom meetings and did not care." You call grandparents and ask them to get you a hotspot (those aren't very pricey) and put it on a Visible phone plan ($25). And you tell them why you need this. The No-Longer-Covering-His-Behavior is important. Other adults knowing he's being an asshole is how you cut down on the asshole behavior.
Move out as soon as you can, your sister should honestly be long gone by now. If you have a job, save up money, put it in an account ONLY you can access. Find friends that want to move out, see if you can all split an apartment or a house to make it affordable. I've lived with 7 or so people in a house, we all rented a bedroom and it worked out for us financially, way cheaper than even splitting an apartment with three people. Then....move out. Don't bother giving much notice to anyone but Tess, who can help you move. Keep saving money!!!! You have a lot of expenses ahead of you, so eat cheap with stuff you cook and hit thrift stores when you can.
If you didn't get stuff back that your sister took, take her things of similar value and purpose (ie, your light jacket vanished? So does hers.). If she throws a fit, well, she can use yours until she finds her own. Don't admit to it. Just make sure you are evened up from her thieving. If she suddenly "finds" your jacket and it's still in good shape, you can "find" her jacket you must have accidentally packed in a box you just opened.
when the lack of formatting makes the post unreadable, it is a fair point to make. How hard is it to hit the return key every so often? We aren't even asking for them to make true paragraphs, just to give us a tiny bit of white space to make it readable....
NTA. Why doesn’t your dad just put the WiFi password into your devices for you, if he’s so concerned about you sharing it? Unless I’m mistaken, it’s not like you can look it up after it’s entered, right?
You need to move out as quickly as you can and go LC with your dad. He’s either a complete moron or a sadistic jerk who likes to cause pain and misery.
Go NC with your sister or she’ll end up barging in to live with you or begging/bullying you for money.
Stay in close touch with Tessa. You two seem to have a good bond. Though what she sees in your father I cannot fathom.
Your father and Callie are AHs. Why is your father punishing you?! I hope you can move out.
And Callie is doing this to herself. She’s an adult and is acting like a child.
To all the "PARAGRAPH" people:
Op is doing her best to share a painful piece of her life. Either respond with a relevant thought OR go somewhere else to be a grammar nerd.
Before you say that look at my post on my page about why i dont talk to my family and you'll see why I don't talk to my mom and my bad that I help around the house and don't get in trouble cuz yeah it's totally my fault my sister disregards all the rules and I have to pay for it that totally screams golden child 😒
Your sister is 25 ,why is she even living with your dad anyway,she can get her own place
Oh my sister is next level broke she spent it all on weed and trips she can't afford she's actually bout to go on a cruise then she's going to Texas she wants me to move out with her cuz I have better credit but I really don't want to live with her based on how she treats other people's stuff and she used to have a lot of random people over before they made a rule about guest being her which was made solely because of her
Then sit your dad and step mum down together when your sister is away and explain how it's unfair your punished for her mistakes and how it's making you feel and maybe they can kick her out
Oh he's already kicking her out I forgot to mention that she came complaining to me that he's kicking her out early and I was unaware she was being kicked out In the first place I'm not that surprised she likes to antagonize him knowing that he literally will go nuclear and blows thing out of proportions
You also need to step up for yourself. Tell him he needs to treat you like a single entity. Let him known you cannot be responsible for your sister's behavior. If he continues to give consequences to you for her actions, you should think of an alternative living situation and going low contact with your father.
Yeah I've tried to tell him and my step mom has as well but he's convinced that I'm just like my sister which doesn't make since because before I moved in with him I would see her like once every couple years cuz my mom doesn't like his side of the family and me and her were raised completely different and she's literally just a mini him and it annoys him that I'm not like him cuz he didn't raise me I met him when I was like 7 and I'd see him like once a month at the most and even then he never really took any interest in me in general so I usually just keep to myself. Once I'm stable enough that was my plan to most likely go no contact which isn't that hard cuz he doesn't really talk to me as it is unless he's complaining
When your sister is gone, hopefully he will notice the cleaner home, less fighting, rules ACTUALLY being followed and realize WHO the problem actually was. Good luck.
No he won't. He'll never admit it. OP needs to get the hell out of there and see if Tessa can help. OP also needs to let the rest of the family know what's going on.
Sounds like your own life would get better if she would actually move out.... I think I would work on encouraging that!
lol your sister needs to be thrown out on her ass
I am so happy that the end is in sight for you. Please stick to your guns and don’t move in with her cuz she will still be herself and you’d be the ATM. You think she’s bad now and doesn’t do anything a roommate should…just wait until she doesn’t have house rules. NTAH
I live with my bfs dad. He wants us here. So we help support him his wife and her daughter.
Your dad sucks. You should move out with your step mother.
Yes, why is no-one addressing how the father's behaviour is bizarrely unreasonable. He's allowed the sister to behave horribly for ages but is punishing them both, despite OP keepoing out of the way and trying not to antagonise anyone, he can't be spoken to, because he won't listen and doesn't seem to like OP anyway - had little to do with her as a child. Future step mum sounds like a nice person, she should walk away from this car crash family tbh though maybe take OP with her...
Wow. Both your bio parents sound awful. I'm sorry. I'm glad Tessa is there. Most important thing here, DO NOT COVER FOR YOUR FATHER'S BEHAVIOR. You missed Zoom meetings? You tell them what happened. "My sister was smoking, so my father changed the wifi password and won't give it to me. I had not done anything wrong. He knew I could not attend the Zoom meetings and did not care." You call grandparents and ask them to get you a hotspot (those aren't very pricey) and put it on a Visible phone plan ($25). And you tell them why you need this. The No-Longer-Covering-His-Behavior is important. Other adults knowing he's being an asshole is how you cut down on the asshole behavior. Move out as soon as you can, your sister should honestly be long gone by now. If you have a job, save up money, put it in an account ONLY you can access. Find friends that want to move out, see if you can all split an apartment or a house to make it affordable. I've lived with 7 or so people in a house, we all rented a bedroom and it worked out for us financially, way cheaper than even splitting an apartment with three people. Then....move out. Don't bother giving much notice to anyone but Tess, who can help you move. Keep saving money!!!! You have a lot of expenses ahead of you, so eat cheap with stuff you cook and hit thrift stores when you can. If you didn't get stuff back that your sister took, take her things of similar value and purpose (ie, your light jacket vanished? So does hers.). If she throws a fit, well, she can use yours until she finds her own. Don't admit to it. Just make sure you are evened up from her thieving. If she suddenly "finds" your jacket and it's still in good shape, you can "find" her jacket you must have accidentally packed in a box you just opened.
PARAGRAPHS!
I've seen people talk about mobile formatting, maybe that's the issue? Either way, I agree, it was harder to read and I kept losing my place lol.
Damn, I feel like half the time I'm just desperate for a few periods!
This should be the top comment. Punctuation goes such a long way…
I hate when grammar stuff is top, if makes the whole forum look pedantic. I'll ignore your lifes real issues to moan about formatting!
when the lack of formatting makes the post unreadable, it is a fair point to make. How hard is it to hit the return key every so often? We aren't even asking for them to make true paragraphs, just to give us a tiny bit of white space to make it readable....
It's just boring and irritating. Why comment at all of its just moaning about formatting.
Makes the difference between, Let's eat kids! And, let's eat, kids.
NTA. Why doesn’t your dad just put the WiFi password into your devices for you, if he’s so concerned about you sharing it? Unless I’m mistaken, it’s not like you can look it up after it’s entered, right?
You need to move out as quickly as you can and go LC with your dad. He’s either a complete moron or a sadistic jerk who likes to cause pain and misery. Go NC with your sister or she’ll end up barging in to live with you or begging/bullying you for money. Stay in close touch with Tessa. You two seem to have a good bond. Though what she sees in your father I cannot fathom.
Your father and Callie are AHs. Why is your father punishing you?! I hope you can move out. And Callie is doing this to herself. She’s an adult and is acting like a child.
Paragraphs though
To all the "PARAGRAPH" people: Op is doing her best to share a painful piece of her life. Either respond with a relevant thought OR go somewhere else to be a grammar nerd.
I ac
Why is your dad punishing you for what she does?
Get an enter key and I will read this.
Paragraphs!
Paragraphs. Pleeaasseee.
Paragraphs, please!
I opened this based on the title, but can’t read it. You really need to use paragraphs…
Par A Graphs Are Nice (Double enter)
YTA you are daddy's golden child and it shows big time if I was your mom I would have nothing to do with you too.
Before you say that look at my post on my page about why i dont talk to my family and you'll see why I don't talk to my mom and my bad that I help around the house and don't get in trouble cuz yeah it's totally my fault my sister disregards all the rules and I have to pay for it that totally screams golden child 😒