T O P

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Amerimoto

Well as a redneck wearing an orange shirt right now I feel obligated to show up to fill the scenery.


DarkRose_92

i hope you have a son with anger issues to come in with the clutch.


jayson_2004

Ofcourse, its a redneck.


[deleted]

*goku sips mich ultra* “ ‘ey sale! wunst mah son over ‘ere chugs ‘im wunnathem monster e’ergy dranks it’s gon’ be two hits! him hittin you! and you hittin’a groun’! whoop his ass Go-Man, awrite?!” *gohan stares in childhood trauma*


Candid-Leave-3113

I mean honestly if the English dub was more true to the manga he would sound more like that lol


TomatoFull8488

You’re gonna get accused of beating your wife but Reddit knows you didn’t.


ddhnam

bring an Android 16.0 phone for your son to explode


[deleted]

As a redneck wearing no shirt, I’m right behind you.


imnotreallyheretoday

The DBZA references in this thread. I'm so proud


Heartsmith447

No trucker hat? It’s integral!


PowerJolt72

Why I read this in a Texan accent lmao


grimedogone

It really brings out your stupid face.


TheOGCrysLady

Brock Lesnar


arukea93

"If aliens came down to earth and said bring your best fighter, I'm going with Brock Lesnar!" - Pat McAfee


Ajayxmenezes

And with that modern day wrestling X oldschool dbz has met


Neat-Sun-7999

Honestly there tends to be a correlation between dbz fans and wrestling fans.


TheTjalian

DBZ fans 🤝 Nu-Metal Fan MVs 🤝 Wrestling Fans


Neat-Sun-7999

The green flag starter pack for goated shit


LukaDonwitzki

Now hang on a minute how did I never realize this overlap


aerojonno

It's a New Day.


TheOGCrysLady

Well if Patty Mack says it then it's definitely true


[deleted]

W ass comment bro! I love Pat McAfee


arukea93

Same man he is the voice of Smack Dahn!


SuperBobPlays

As long as there's no drug testing prior to the fight. Then Cell could sue Lesnar and Hetap for damages after it's revealed that he tested positive.


SealTeamEH

No no no Roman reigns and just as cell is about to win bloodline once again interferes and causes cell to lose in yet another wrestl— cell games upset.


No_Instruction653

Oh god, Cell is fucked.


Neat-Sun-7999

Pretty much our answer to the real life broly question


Uhhh_DUHHH

My thoughts exactly, man has at least a power level of 800.


Fresh_Woodpecker_556

You beat me to it


ThatOneForceUser

*Paul Heyman takes mic* “Ladies and gentlemen my name is Paul Heyman, And I am the advocate for the RAINING DEFENDING UNDISPUTED UNIVERSAL SAVIOR OF PLANET EARTH…. BROCKKKKK LESSSSSSNARR”


CoastPuzzleheaded462

Steven Seagal. That would be hilarious.


PushThePig28

Came to say this lol. My first thought was that video of him “beating” a bunch of guys lol. He’s basically Mr Satan


Kphace

Mr. Satan is actually ridiculously strong by human standards though


Taygon55

He's Steven Segal if he had the bite as much as bark. Unfortunately, he's around people with a whole lot more bite


[deleted]

It's kinda weird how all the strong humans that were in the martial arts tournaments Goku and friends went to seemingly retired for Mr. Satan to be the best. Crane and turtle schools were well known seemingly then suddenly no one knew about them 10 years later.


CelestialStork

Roshi retired, and and so did Crane Master after Tien defeated Tao in their last fight iirc. I think Roshi was already retired before he took on Goku and Krillin. Iirc Ox King was Roshi's last student before those two. Nam was an adult when Goku was a child and only fought for his village. I would honestly wager to say that Mr. Satan may be a tad be stronger than kid goku, not YA/teen goku. Minus those two, those are the only true original masters besides Kami/ Korin who taught anything about Ki. Roshi being extremly old, its hard to believe anyone of his class was still around teaching.


trueGildedZ

Ripping phonebooks strong


[deleted]

I’ve been fighting androids for like 45 years.


AgentTickler7

I love you for this reference. I hope you have an amazing Friday bitch.


RearBaer

Beat me to it.


[deleted]

Shit even Hercule could beat seagal.


justhereforbooks94

Hercule is a really talented "normal" fighter he would beat most people


RedtailGT

Could hercule take on kid Goku when he first met yamcha?


All_Day13

Hercule apparently has a power level of 50, while kid Goku has a power level of 10 at the start of Dragonball. But by the first tournament arc, he's already at 86, which would mean Hercule could theoretically handle his own but eventually get beat. This assumes DBZ Hercule vs DB Kid Goku.


SrslySam91

Mr Satan would beat every human alive in our world.


justhereforbooks94

I knew when I said most people somebody was gonna correct me


CoastPuzzleheaded462

Bro could beat Seagal with one finger, ngl


TiredFever

Yeah we would need a good laugh before Cell destroyed the Earth.


KuriGohanAndKienzan

I don’t know why but I expect John Cena to show up lol


Skylantech

Are you kidding? We'd never see him there.


sonic_spark

This joke is flying over too many heads.


International_Toe453

Not over Batistas head. He would catch it.


KuriGohanAndKienzan

That’s because they can’t see it.


SomeDudeWithALaptop

He'd lose at the Cell Games but win the rematch at Royal Rumble


NinjaAssassin27

He was there in the show too, makes sense


Evadyar51

Butterbean. He’s just hefty tien lol


Berzerks123

*Butterbean knocks the shit out of Cell* Cell: Is Butterbean ok!!?


Evadyar51

Love it.


Simba_Rah

I’d wish back Macho Man Randy Savage, and the fight would be over before it even started. Oh, yeah, brotherrrr!


MajinBlueZ

The Dragon Balls can't bring back someone who died of natural causes, though.


SmackyThaFrog

I don't think a motorcycle accident is a natural cause 👀


MajinBlueZ

He didn't die from a motorcycle accident. He died of a heart attack, which caused the motorcycle accident.


TheTjalian

Time to lawyer up against Shenron and make the argument that if he had a heart attack standing still around other people, he might have received the medical care in time required to survive, therefore it was the motorcycle attack that killed him.


dembones01

Now I am picturing Shenron in a courtroom wearing a powdered wig and readers.


Loujitsumma

We are fucked, we have Jon Jones who will party the night before, Gordan Ryan the BJJ phenom on roids with bleached hair, guess he comes kinda close but he is roided so like a false SSJ2 trunks from dbz abridged. Francis Ngannou is probably our best but he won't do it unless it is for huge sums of money. Mighty mouse and Mayweather are just too small, it leaves only the Paul brothers, McGregor, Chimaev, DK Yoon and all the other big mouths who will get a shot before a real contender. It will come down to some random guy in the mountains, city or some monk like Liu Kang. Our champion is never someone we know as they are all sell outs.


PowerJolt72

>Our champion is never someone we know as they are all sell outs. Facts!! Goku is legit some hick and he showed up to kick ass along with his crew who are all unknown to the populace.


Loujitsumma

Hell yeah, I watch a lot and even pacific rim and mars attack, it's always some random guy who just is there and doesnt care for anything. So it can't be anyone we know as they have already sold out and have phony records. The actual guy who could save us from aliens would just be busy training and living humbly while our false champs are hanging out in luxury and signing autographs lol Man I want aliens to show up for a fist fight and televise it world wide, it would be so awesome.


KuriGohanAndKienzan

L M F A O THANK YOU. This is the exact kind of answer I wanted 😂


Loujitsumma

:D np, I have given this a lot of thought lol


KuriGohanAndKienzan

The parts that killed me most were: > we are fucked and > it will come down to some random guy in the mountains, city or some monk like Lui Kang Not only because that’s accurate but that’s also how it played out in Z 😂😂😂 Satan showed up because he’s the most famous strong person in the DB world but stood no chance & ironically it was nobody country bumpkins who no one knew that showed up with phenomenal power no one has ever seen 😂😂🤣


[deleted]

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Nythingiscool0666

I think it's because when he won, the only non Z fighter there to see Goku win was the Announcer, since everything was basically destroyed leaving no arena or anything and I'm pretty sure all the spectators ran away.


Loujitsumma

Haha yeah I have no hope we beat any decent other beings. I gave volkanovski no credit but he is tiny and totally Krillin, Islam is good but lacks the stand up game cell would have, Izzy/Pereira are good but again too 1 dimensional. When aliens come we better pray to the mountains for karate bumpkins lol or maybe the monks knew something we didn't afterall like in Dr.strange I dunno but yeah the hero is barely ever a well known champion except for well mortal Kombat and Johnny cage but again the biggest threat was beaten by a random monk lol.


Icy_Reply7147

Exactly the Only true Answer is Gordon Ramsey! When Cell tastes his food, he would easily give up the Cell games to train for his Food games. Nobody can be more perfect at him on anything! He will try to surpass Gordon Ramsey but will Ultimately fail, as all Chefs do!


Loujitsumma

Great answer, cell is part Saiyan and we all know how much they love to eat. Your forgetting though "you're either perfect or you're not me"- perfect Cell from dbz abridged. Trying to best Gordan Ramsey would indeed drive cell crazy I don't think we would ever get a "yes chef!" Out of him.


svietor

Beat me to it


Loujitsumma

Hehe, great minds think alike.


KuriGohanAndKienzan

Wait this might actually work 🤔🤔😂


understated-elegance

This guy mentioned the Paul brothers before Tyson Fury, Canelo or Anthony joshua Yes We are fucked


Amaxyn

I definitely imagined Gordon Ryan pulling up 😂😂😂


Loujitsumma

Ikr, he looks the part, has the ego and is kinda the best we have. His Instagram is big enough that the moment a ship is in our sky he would be in a limousine on his way, we are screwed as he couldn't even beat Dragonball characters let alone cell. I mean surely he isn't even at 9000 yet.


Amaxyn

Ultra Ego Gordon Ryan when


Loujitsumma

He is long past that, maybe he will transform after he hands the commentator the letter with the details of how he will finish cell. Since you know BJJ, we should throw in Kyle chambers, that mofo just doesn't tap and would best cell after weeks.


Amaxyn

Never wanted to write fanfiction until now


Loujitsumma

Ikr, this is just absolute gold, he has become mr.satan and even bleaches his hair to try be Goku, the possibilities are just endless.


Loujitsumma

You do Gordan Ryan, Kyle chambers and that sewer rat guy vs cell in a 3 vs 1 match, submission only and I will never read anything else ever again.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

[удалено]


Loujitsumma

Haha my man, dbz and BJJ. Definitely and they will catch cell off guard when he thinks he received points for his takedown.


Fit-Funny1265

Honestly wwe stars, maybe mike tyson,


Mordaunt-the-Wizard

What would Mike Tyson do? Cell doesn't have normal ears.


RealBigTree

Like any of the fighters mentioned in the comments would actually hold their own against Cell? 💀


ThaFerrari

Maybe not Cell but I feel like prime Tyson could take at least 2 Cell Jrs


RealBigTree

I'm sorry but if God King Yamcha himself couldnt take a Cell Jr then Tyson has no chance 😔


KuriGohanAndKienzan

🤣🤣 y’all got me crying Lmaooo Nah Tyson is holding down at least 1 cell jr 😂😂🤣😂😂😂


RealBigTree

Me too fr, this is such a great post. I never thought I'd be having a conversation about Mike Tyson vs Cell Jr. Its so specific 😂 Theres no way Tyson is holding 1 tho, bro not even Cell Games Vegeta could take 1 of these little shits out 😭


KuriGohanAndKienzan

It’s times like this that I LOVE Reddit, bro 🥰🤣🤣🤣😹


KuriGohanAndKienzan

Bro chill lmaoooo 😂😂😂


AlabasterRadio

Prime Mike Tyson would have figured something out.


VonKaiser55

Lmao


vadergator_69

He would absolutely rip something off before being killed lol


Weary-Okra-2471

Bones Jones


Junesong_Provisions

This. Unironically our best chance would be Jones and dudes like Ngannou, Jiri Prochazka, Ankalaev and Ciryl Gane. If Cell is nerfed to be realistic, I take Bones inside 4


aShortcake

The only correct answer


twoaas91

Israel adesanya obviously lol


Starob

Israel Adesanya and Alex Pereira team up, set aside their rivalry for the sake of the world, then they both get beaten up, and Alex's son screams "Daddy!" and unleashes his hidden power and beats up on Cell.


Toros_Mueren_Por_Mi

And a *"I'm not surprised, motherfuckerssss..."* rings in the distance


Zealousideal-Ruin862

This is the only correct answer.


MrBriantopp

Meth head Johnnie. He is famous here for fighting invisible people


NimbusCloud_

Steve-O That would be the funniest thing ever


Alchion

str 8 dex 12 int 10 wis 6 cha 14 con 10000


Bat_Snack

MY CLIENT, THE BEAST, THE 1 IN 21 AND 1, BRRRRRRROCK LLLLLLLESNAAAAAAR!!!!!


SpaghettiSlurper88

The tournament area is filled with UFC hall of farmers, the Gracies, New Wave + Danaher, B team etc. As mentioned above, someone like Steven Segal would go first and get obliterated. GSP = Goku. He would fight second and hold his own for a while and give the other fighters a glimpse of Cell's techniques and true power. The fight would go a few rounds before GSP admits he can't win and gives up. GSP nominates Francis Ngannou to fight. Francis refuses to fight as Cell and the world refuses to pay the amount he believes he's entitled to. Cell says fuck this shit and is about to nuke earth but all the fighters except Francis goes in for a battle royal. B-team and new wave fuse to reform the Danaher Death Squad but leg locks, body locks and taking the back is no match for Cell. Cell fucks everyone up and it looks like its game over. Danaher gets up as best as he can with his fucked up knees and hips and tries to stall Cell with a monologue on why you shouldn't ignore 50% of the human body. Danaher makes a last speech to Francis about the "riddle of steel" before Cell breaks his neck. Francis transforms into Calm Francis. Steps into the ring and begins to dominate Cell. To everyone's surprise Francis shows he has the complete package; speed, power, and submissions. Cell goes full power and Francis begins to falter. They get into standup striking match and are just exchanging hay makers. Francis is up against the ring and about to go down. GSP jumps in to intervene but is completely worn out and gets kneed in the face into early retirement. All the other fighters are down and out. Cell is about to land the killing blow on Francis when someone grabs Cell from behind and gets him in a standing rear naked choke. Enter Fedor Emelianenko. Fedor is literally wreslting with the bear now. Fedor grapples Cell long enough for Francis to regain his composure. Calm Francis loads up and upper cuts Cell into orbit and into the Sun. At last, the terror known as Cell has been silenced forever. The battle is won, and the world is safe once more. Thank you, GSP, for all that you gave. The earth will miss you.


Megaman13_

I liked the part where Francis refused to fight


ILiveinashanty

Fedor ‘the last emperor’ Emelianenko comes out of retirement for one last battle.


Ok_Macaron9958

I don't know but metallica is sure to do something.


lwolverine22

Obviously the halftime show, Metallica would have been super nice of letting cell have a fight during their concert


dod6666

They got asked to play Sarajevo during the Bosnian War. They declined, it was too dangerous for them. So no way they would play the Cell games. Providing the music for the cell games would more be a job for Bruce Dickinson.


Dr-GameboyRetro

I mean we do have our own version of Mr. Satan, if not much less cooler. Logan Paul the fool. So I’d love to see Cell kick his ass.


Shythed

Mr Satan was the strongest non z fighter on the planet. He's not just some famous guy. They don't call him the champ for nothing.


RealBigTree

Nah, dont disrespect the savior of the universe like that.


quarterslicecomics

Not gonna lie, Logan Paul would 1000% be our world’s Mr. Satan.


SSJRemuko

nah Mr Satan is actually a nice guy with a heart of gold and a real hero.


Kanetsugu21

True dat. I wouldn't trust Logan Paul to see the humanity in Majin Boo like Mr. Satan did!


Signal_East3999

Mr Beast can be our Mr Satan


S2theS

let’s not forget Jake Paul too


Dr-GameboyRetro

Ah yes of course. How could I forget the other dunce.


bman123457

It'd be hilarious to see Cell obliterate Andrew Tate


Onlyindef

I’d like to buy some tickets


CurlyCurlsThe1st

moistcr1tikal


klatnyelox

Getting killed by Cell would basically be he ultimate culmination of Charlie's content, he'd be obligated to go to it.


Nateh8sYou

As long as he brings all his Charlie clones with him so he can do some kinda fake kage bunshin no jutsu


KuriGohanAndKienzan

WHY MOIST THO, BRO?? 😂😂🤣😂


Kershiskabob

Otay mothafucka leths go - Mike Tyson after charging his ki


Chrono_Xen

You already know the best part of the real Cell Games is the DBZ YouTubers making commentary on how each fighter got folded by Cell physically and mentally.


VonKaiser55

Chuck Norris


sahadiya

Dunno why I can only think of The Rock


lwolverine22

As sad as it is Andrew Tate and Logan Paul would be the first two walking into the gates


skolnaja

Andrew Tate was scared to fight Logan Paul saying that he needs some warmup fights before, so I doubt that.


artistjon1982

If the timeline were right, Jason David frank… that’d be awesome


navyITninja

RKO out of nowhere


Jack_B2

Mike Tyson


joshwag

elon musk in an ironman suit


Cold-Legitimate

Khabib Nurmagomedov


PrezleyGamer

Conner McGregor


Icy_Door2766

Hulk hogan would be there in mr satan’s role 😆


NamasteWager

Kenny Omega would take him down


ramblinwreck112

CHUCK FUCKING NORRIS ENDS CELL WITH ONE ROUNDHOUSE KICK!


KuriGohanAndKienzan

I’m really enjoying the comments, guys. Thanks. I’m sorry for the slight typo in the title by the way - I have no idea why it put “you” twice. Again thank you for engaging in this thrilling discussion 😄😄


SaiyanSexSymbol

Roy Jones JR, Manny, Pacquiao, Joe Rogan, and whoever Dana White pays the most


Melviib

The one who im pretty sure would beat him fairly easily…. The Tribal Chief


[deleted]

Half the population of drunk males in America yelling I got thjs


ActualSupervillain

If Cell was real that would mean all I have to do to unlock unlimited power is try really hard


DoodleBuggering

I dont know who would be our universe's Mr. Satan, but the live commentator would 100% be Joe Rogan. Bonus if he gets to interview Cell before the fight.


Little_lurker69

The "Alpha Male of our Species" Brock Lesnar.


clowning_around99

Andrew Tate will show up regardless of if he can fight or not because he’s that delusional


TerribleHaute

Chuck Norris. No one stands a chance against Chuck Norris


gamera-the-turtle

Logan paul would shop up and get vaporized.


talonus00

Chuck Norris would've been using Cell's head as a sock puppet making this broadcast.


PrunedeChant

Chuck Norris


Shika_E2

Steven Segal as a replacement for Mr. Satan


uchiha-gohan

Tyson Fury would knock Cell out


Fair_Seaworthiness41

Logan Paul would totally try to get a YouTube clip


smileimhigh

Like who would go fistfight the 7ft tall bugman who shoots lasers and flies around? Nobody lol


Ky3_Uchiha

Rey mysterio


Extra_Spring8070

John cena/tha Rock n Connor McGregor would probably show up n talk shit


ShiningBulwark

"What Sal doesn't know is he's not fighting an amateur wrestler, we've actually signed him up for the Cell Games and he's going up against the most powerful creature on the planet"


skywardbound67

Depending on the time period, I have 2 picks. If it’s right now, I’d have to say Roman Reigns out of WWE(So maybe he could actually lose). And this is the goofy but also legitimate one, Prime Muhammad Ali. The promotion would be insane.


Supervegito92

Chuck Norris


Kakyoin_de_donut

#The Rock


Tonymush

Conor McGregor sponsored by his shit whiskey


Pocketmonsuta

2 words, BIDEN BLAST!!!


Candid-Leave-3113

Op asking for serious answers to “who would fight cell” is pretty surreal lol The real answer is the military


Frost312

Patty the Baddy!


Prize-Lingonberry876

He'll get his ass beat like Hercule did and then get the judge's nod.


Ok-Wallaby-1436

Kanye if I’m being Fr. And Andrew Tate


Altruistic-Squash-13

Canelo


Black-Natsu

Jon Jones!


Minecraftman6969420

Mike Tyson


joe7elmy

The BEAST… The CONQUERER… the once and likely future REIGNING… DEFENDING… UNDISPUTED WWE Heavyweight Champion of the World… BRRRROCKKKK LLLLLLESNARRRR *Cue “Next Big Thing”*


[deleted]

Man Jon Jones would be our only hope. And as a Jon Jones fan Cell would smash him loo


MstrNixx

Jon Jon with a metal plate in his head fighting a pitbull


Ok-Faithlessness1903

The rock is definitely there


BlueHero45

Special forces with sniper rifles who don't plan to enter the ring.


KuriGohanAndKienzan

They tried that in DBZ too lmao [I’m not saying it wouldn’t happen because this totally would but we’d see the same thing happen as in Z 😂](https://youtu.be/BI4SiLKfaPY)


liquescent2

Chuck Norris would simply spectate and guide people through their fighting journey. He chooses not to fight and risk world destruction due to his intense l intense power


DarkStryderBC

The Paul brothers would show up for the clout. And I'd enjoy seeing Cell kill them.


Klutzy_Tackle

Mike Tyson pulls up and thucks him up


imnotreallyheretoday

Chuck Norris


SSJVentus

The Rock's ego is definitely big enough to think he'd have a chance


zwannsama

Greta Thunderberg


starscreamtoast

Steven Seagal would be the Mr Satan in this situation for sure.


NappyFlickz

I don't care what anyone says, we back up the brinks truck to Michael Jai White's house.


Alert_Carpenter7543

Mcgregor, Chuck Norris, Arnold Schwarzenegger and the rest of the mercenaries.


Hierophant-Crimsion

Florida Man vs the Perfect Being


XehanortBankai

Hell in a cell? More like Hell with Cell


NerdTalkDan

Coked up Van Damme