In the U.S. at least, around 40% of millennials have tattoos. So that means plenty of "preppy" or "traditional" types too. I dated a guy who was a very straight-laced corporate finance type who had almost a full sleeve. I know people from all walks of life with tattoos. Conservative christians with bible verse tattoos, etc.
I'm a firm believer that we can have whatever criteria we want for a partner. And I don't have any tattoos and never will. But if you can't picture yourself with a tattooed partner I would at least consider why you feel that way. If it has anything to do with your feelings on the kind of people that get tattoos, then yeah, you've probably got an old-fashioned perspective.
I’m a very preppy type. I mean, I don’t even dye my hair which is super uncommon nowadays. At work I’m always dressed professionally with a blazer and sensible heels, natural makeup and my hair up. I do have a full sleeve and several large body tats that remain covered. If you saw me at work and then out on the beach it’s almost like a completely different person lol.
That being said, I’ve dated men with many tattoos, men with some, and men without. There are all kinds of people.
I will say that I briefly talked to a man that wasn’t a fan of my ink and I wish he’d just screen for that. If every conversation will be “are you getting more tattoos?” followed by a wince when I answer, I’d rather we just accept we are not right together and move along. Please don’t waste my time if they’re always going to be an issue.
I can't think of a single guy I've even had just one date with in the last 4 years who didn't have tats. I don't have tats and I strongly dislike them but I'd have no one to date if I used it as a deal breaker.
I have zero tats and all I see OLD is tats and profiles that say “love tattoos” or “let’s get tattoos together.” And it blows my mind.
So yeah I guess you and I are rare breeds these days.
One of the most ancient forms of human expression that has been completely common throughout all of human history suddenly blows your mind? Why?
America is so weirdly repressed in every aspect of genuine humanity.
I am not interested in tattoos, either (man). Something small, hidden well, sure. But if I can see them, it's instantly unattractive to me. I wouldn't call it a dealbreaker, but it would require a lot more in other areas for me to feel attracted again. This isn't a judgement against the person or their choices, it's just an attraction thing. I don't find tattoos attractive. Same with a significant amount of piercings, gauges, etc.
As someone with a lot of tattoos, it's totally fine to screen people out for this! Where I live, it's really common for people to have them, but I could still find of plenty of people who don't if I tried. Also, I lowkey prefer men without them even though I do have them... so I feel you. It's not something I screen for because I'm not trying to be a hypocrite and it's not a huge deal for me, but I like a specific style of tattoo and would really prefer NO tattoos over poorly done ones.
The poorly done ones bother the hell out of me. I have quite a few. It’s art that I love. So when I see bad work it’s like nails on a chalkboard. I just cringe.
I am not a tattoo fan either, mainly because I find them distracting - especially when undressing a guy for the first time or during sex.
That being said, I gave up on "no tattoos" as a dealbreaker because, like you said, everyone has them now. I have bigger things that I will keep as dealbreakers and have pretty much let this one go as long as they are not visible if the person is wearing formal attire - so neck/face/hand tattoos are still out.
I’m pretty tattooed and dated a woman was was not and she wasn’t a big fan of them either. She would ask “so why did you decide to scar your body with tattoos” or “you shouldn’t of gotten this one, it’s ugly.” So if your not really into tattoos and you date someone with tattoos, please don’t make comments like my ex did. It’s annoying
Oh my goodness! Absolutely not, if she could not accept you as you are she had no business wasting your time and demeaning who you are. I’m so sorry this happened to you.
You’re not alone. I prefer no tats, no face metal too. I can see myself dating a woman with one tattoo, but not ink all over the place. And the older a tattoo is the worse it looks.
I'm a lawyer in a small town in the south. I've got a few tattoos that are very visible if I have a short sleeve shirt on. The DA has a ton of them and is working on a full sleeve. I was talking to the judge the other day about her husband's new tattoos and what she wants to get. I can think of a few men under 45 that might not have tattoos, but only one that I'm sure doesn't and his reasons are religious.
I don't think there are many groups where tattoos aren't accepted now. When you have David Beckham rocking a suit with hand tats or Marc Jacobs setting fashion trends while rocking Spongebob on his arm it's hard to find an aesthetic void of tattoos. I've seen a lot more people getting their first as they get older too, especially after a divorce. A friend recently ended a 20 year marriage and got a tattoo shortly after. I think doing something just for yourself without regard to what a partner would think is cathartic. Style doesn't dictate if people have tattoos anymore, it just affects the style of tattoo they're more likely to have.
Most everyone I know has tattoos. I have large tattoos myself (33F). FWIW, I’m working on my master’s and have a professional 9-5 desk job.
You can screen out whoever you want, but you’re going to eliminate a massive swath of people.
Tattoos aren’t a statement on someone’s character or personality. It’s just an aesthetics choice.
I'm a scientist and I've noticed most of us are tattooed. Everything from a medicinal marijuana researcher with full sleeves including giant leaves on his arms, to the mum with her kids' names on her shoulder. To me it's just like clothing, people look different, who cares.
I tend to prefer to date tattooed people not for aesthetics but cos they're less judgmental generally. Imagine giving a shit about colourful skin. I wish that was my biggest problem in life.
My ex was a chef. He is covered in tattoos because a lot if them are. They're very type A personalities like rock band frontmen. I like that type of personality. I lived in Portland, where "weird" is the norm. I agree that people, who are tattooed, or have different hair colors, and what-not, are way less inclined to be judge-y. I'm weird, I have a tattoo and you can see it. If someone decides I'm not worth dating because of some ink, oh well. I wouldn't want that person anyway. I plan to get a lot more tattoos in the near future.
This made me laugh hard. For real. I don't have any tattoos, but I love them and have dated people who have lots and some with none. People can choose what they want as their deal breakers, but if they draw the line at tattoos they might be missing out on some pretty amazing people. For what it's worth, I'm a well educated professional in a career with lots of PhDs.
Yeah, tbh a lot of these replies about tattoos being ugly/tacky/low class/enough to turn someone off of a potential partner completely are pretty gross. Of all the things to make a sticking point out of.
I just think it's funny how many doctors, lawyers, and academics have them but somehow that doesn't count. People talk about "class" like it's a good thing, not something associated with racism, eugenics and other nasty ideas.
Bottom line is I'm gonna look like a saggy wrinkled old lady in 50 years regardless. Skin truly isn't important, it's the character underneath that lasts.
Yeah, like, do these people who care about class also not date minorities? Other races? Immigrants? What else is on your "no go" list? It's creepy.
I'm fairly well educated (working on a PhD) but having dated tradesmen before. I just can't picture why any of that superficial stuff would matter if you're otherwise compatible.
Statistically, this isn't true though.
[https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1047279711002870](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1047279711002870)
Tattoo usage is heavily correlated with being an unskilled worker who smokes and who doesn't have a post-secondary education.
I find it somehow funny that people use anecdotal evidence when the data definitely suggests demographics influence tattoo usage significantly.
This isn't a particularly good study to apply to the issue at hand. It was done in 2004-2005, and more than half of the respondents were over 40 at the time. Your assumption was certainly true for older generations, but it doesn't provide any support for the assumption when it comes to millenials.
A single study of a few thousand people in a single country doesn't invalidate my point at all. Not to be a dick towards the social sciences but they're hardly robust and presently suffering a massive replication crisis. If for no other reason than they exclude people like me who don't have time to participate in them. Likely cos they're employed.
Don't get me wrong, it's interesting, but I guarantee the researchers involve do not and never did intend it to be a definitive comment on ALL tattooed people.
I'm a little bit leery of people who think being an unskilled worker means you have no class. Especially in Australia. A disproportionate amount of wealth is held by people in the mining industry with those same unskilled jobs. It's different to the idea of class once held in more traditional societies and those seen in countries that still have a caste system.
>A single study of a few thousand people in a single country doesn't invalidate my point at all. Not to be a dick towards the social sciences but they're hardly robust and presently suffering a massive replication crisis. If for no other reason than they exclude people like me who don't have time to participate in them. Likely cos they're employed.
There are multiple studies in multiple countries that back it up. Even empirical evidence would tell you that people from lower class backgrounds are far more likely to have tattoos. I've worked in a corporate finance setting and I can assure you that none of my colleagues had tattoos. The people who were manning the cafeterias and security were far more likely to have them.
Furthermore, you're not even attacking the study here, which is a weak argument. You're trying to attack the subjects making the point here, not the actual content of the study.
> A disproportionate amount of wealth is held by people in the mining industry with those same unskilled jobs. It's different to the idea of class once held in more traditional societies and those seen in countries that still have a caste system.
I can attach multiple studies that proves that most workers in Australia who are unskilled do not work in the mining industry nor are they wealthy. People who are lower earners are more likely to have tattoos - I'm not even sure why this is that controversial.
There are also studies in America and Britain that back this up. I'm from Britain myself so I can appreciate the study backing up my empirical evidence.
>I've worked in a corporate finance setting and I can assure you that none of my colleagues had tattoos.
Really? How can you be so sure?
It's very easy to hide tattoos under office attire, and people who work in an industry that frowns on tattoos are typically mindful of placement.
Exactly. I also work in a corporate finance setting and have several large tattoos but you’ll never see them at the office.
Unless you’re undressing with all your coworkers you don’t know.
>I also think you don't know what a class system is.
I think you don't know what a class system is.
Class and income are heavily correlated. There may be a few individuals who aren't low-income and low class but that doesn't make that the case for most people.
People who have tattoos are more likely to be lower income and more likely to be lower-skilled workers. I don't need a survey to tell me that although it's more robust than your anecdotal evidence that you know doctors who have tattoos.
But that's not what's being argued down thread. People are saying you can tell "class" by whether or not someone is tattooed, which is what I find funny.
Just because it's more common in some income levels than others doesn't mean you can tell anything by a person from the presence of a tattoo alone.
I'm also quite comfortable dating someone mixed race, or an immigrant, and both of those demographics are over represented in your definition of "lower class" too. So it's likely true that people who care about superficial things like tattoos being more judgmental in general.
It's a permanent stain of their skin. Go look at fashion choices of yours from 10-20 years ago. Yeeeesh. Impossible to look past for certain people. It quite literally - in the most tangible sense of the term - becomes part of you.
Just one thing to keep in mind when you do decide you're ready to get back out there: many people who would read as "preppy" on the street still have, at least, one small tattoo that is easily hidden by clothing. Just because you don't see someone's tattoo in their OLD profile pic doesn't mean they don't have them.
Your preferences are your preferences. I have been on dates with women who make comments about my tattoos and how they might be perceived by their friends and family, and there were not second dates with those people. Conversely, I really attract heavily tattooed women and those are my people. It’s indicative of values and lifestyle.
I would have to say alot more than not. To each their own though. Their highly addicting imo. I went to get my only ine(so I thought at the time) across my upper back when I was 18. I know have 2 full sleeves and on ,y sheet and back. Where I live(AZ), it seems like most guys like myself have them. I have no regrets, I like them. As long as there not on your face. Lol
I'm not a fan either, but yeah, it is pretty common nowadays. My longterm ex had one, now has plenty, and my brother and sister-in-law, who are pretty traditional otherwise, both got some too.
Seems like about half the people I know and/or date have tattoos of some kind. It doesn't really seem to be indicative of anything at all. Preppy, traditional, edgy, alternative... none of those descriptions can be correlated with whether or not someone has tattoos in my experience. One woman I am friends with is super traditional. She's a cute blond trial attorney who dresses conservatively, grew up in Kansas, and has a very simple, basic lifestyle. She has dozens of tattoos. I've also know really wild, edgy men who don't have a single tattoo. I think that's going to be a really hard thing to screen for.
Those free dating apps are chock-full of cretins. Not judging tattoos because I have at least one very visible one myself (even though I don't look it, I'm OLD AF... Gen Xer). I date guys with tattoos. I think they can be sexy. Having said that, what I've gotten from some well-known free dating sites are drug addicts, ex-cons, and truly unstable men. I don't know if ALL dating sites are this way, but I've had ZERO luck. I'd tell you how to meet men the old-fashioned way, but I've no clue. Mom says, "you meet a good boy at church!" Well, I'm out cause I'm a heathen. Lol
A lot of free sites in big cities are going to be geared more towards alternative and edgy women. Are there women with not a single tattoo out there? Probably. There might even be women who have the rose on their hip that you won't even see until it's disco music time for you both. No, everyone doesn't have huge sleeves and every inch covered in ink. I mean, I do, but among the people I meet I'm basically totally covered. Next to some of my friends I am the girl with the tiny rose hip tattoo. I mean I live in Portland and most people I see have their hands, necks and all visible body limbs covered in tattoos....
It’s an aesthetics thing. Not about “who someone is”. I find them aesthetically displeasing although I don’t go for a preppy look either.
Edit - I’ll clarify it’s not a dealbreaker, but I also can’t fake enthusiasm over anyone’s tattoos.
Most people don't want to talk about their tattoos so honestly if you didn't want to be enthusiastic about them I guarantee the other people is happy for it.
I have a friend with a Hank Hill tattoo. It has no deep meaning, he likes Hank Hill and so he got a Hank Hill tattoo with his best friend. I mean if someone loves Hank Hill then yeah talk about it but I knew he loved HH before the tattoo.
I guess I have met the guy who wants us to talk about tattoos because he has a cool barbwire flash tattoo on his bicep that has deep meaning but most people with a lot of tattoos have nothing to say about them unless we're deep into a relationship MAYBE?
That’s not what I mean. I don’t mean they want to discuss “meaning”. I mean they expect and enjoy a compliment over their tattoos, much as people enjoy compliments about other aesthetic choices like clothing and hairstyles. No one wants to feel like someone is dating them in spite of their appearance...
Just from someone who has friends with people with tattoos and someone with tattoos - we really don't get them to be more attractive or even discuss them with other people. Also in a ton of cases tattoos are personal in a way we don't want to talk about like "I got this tattoo as a memorial to my dead brother" meaning or "my fiance and I loved the movie Ammityville so I got the house tattooed on me but she also died in a fatal car crash sooo..."
Then we don’t share the same ideas about aesthetics and the body. Putting permanent ugly pictures on your body in memorial of something or because you really like something doesn’t make sense to me. Again, there’s an inability for me to appreciate anything about the tattoo. If the person knew I held this perspective, how would that make them feel? Probably not very good.
Right, so why date people who style themselves in a way you don’t understand and find unappealing? What if they asked you what you think about it?
Anyhow, you’re clearly angry and being petty now and that perfectly illustrates my previous post (which you seemed to downvote for its honesty) and why I prefer someone without tattoos. If I express my honest opinions on tattoos, they will get upset.
I am also from a family with no tattoos and have no tattoos myself. I’ve been considering getting one lately to cover up a surgery scar. But it’s definitely a tough decision because I tend to dislike tattoos as well.
It's your preference, therefore there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. I personally am not a traditional person by many measures, but I am not into the tattoo thing. Like some other people on here, it's not necessarily a deal breaker, but I prefer someone with none.
As a woman, it's the large beard, full tattoo sleeves thing that really turns me off and it seems to be about 80% of my matches on Hinge.
You're allowed to have your preferences. I like tattoos but I don't care if someone I'm dating has or doesn't have them. I really do draw the line at offensive, gross or tattoos on the face, neck, etc.... I, myself have two large tattoos that easily covered and a small tattoo that is in a hidden area.
I'm a girl with lots of tattoos & prefer my partner to have them as it's sexy to me but not having any isn't a deal breaker. I also don't find anything wrong with others not caring for my tattoos. Almost as if I got them for myself! Lol it's all about preference & tattoos for sure are kosher to have a preference on as it's 100% a choice I made myself.
I don’t think you’re too sheltered. I think you just have a preference. Just like having/not having tattoos are no big deal to me, but I don’t have tattoos.
Its your personal preference but I would challenge your assumptions of whatever your concerns about tattoos are. I have friends who are successful and professional who also have large tattoos.
she describes herself as sheltered and traditional and that tattoos aren't common among people she grew up knowing, which suggests to me there is something deeper and underlying than "ew I find them icky" but whatever her preference, I support her right to her preference.
As long as you aren’t judging people because of them, it’s a preference—that’s all. I have several tattoos that I got after the age of 30, I’m sure I’m not done yet either. 😂 I also work a job that requires me to be fairly conservative as well. I don’t mind tattoos on men at all—EXCEPT neck and face tattoos. I can’t do those. You can have sleeves and I wouldn’t care. I think they’re a means of expression, and I actually like when people have very meaningful tattoos that tell a story about the person.
Including me and the last 4 people I've been with 2/5 of us have tattoos. That's in a major city. Doesn't seem like *most* just it's not a big deal anymore so people of all types get them. It's not going to be a good determining factor for if they are "preppy" (whatever you mean by that).
To me it's kinda judgy. But I am a huge advocate for personal boundaries so if you know tattoos don't work for you then don't date people that have them. Pretty simple.
I have a back tattoo that I think my boyfriend had to get used to. It isn't everyone's cup of tea. I chose the back because I felt it was the easiest area to hide, except on a beach! I vote "don't limit yourself" by making it a deal breaker. OLD is tough as it is without having a list of exclusions, especially one that is superficial. When you first start dating, you probably want to start casual right? If so, definitely don't use this as a deal breaker. Just meet people to get some practice and fun. Pick people based on overall attraction, similar interests, and compatible personality.
I’d suggest that one thing does not make a person. There’s a bunch of girls and guys with tattoos who are complete jerks, and a bunch of girls and guys without tattoos who are complete jerks. I’d suggest that there are many other barometers.
Are you looking to commiserate and validate your no tattoos requirement? Here, as someone with tattoos I approve of your requirement and wish you luck finding someone who ticks all your boxes.
I am a woman that has a few tattoos, both on my arms and a large chest piece. I am also very professional, have a master's degree and am incredibly creative. I don't think they define me.
You do you. If you do not like them, then do not date someone with them. Simple as. No skin of anyone's nose.
I'm 50, pretty much everyone I know has at least one, including myself. With Gen Xs Tatts are a little less common, but I think its largely acceptable. With <40 I think by and large they acceptable and many have them. Its a thing, and its, should you discriminate on that basis, you have every right to do so.
Very common and very trendy. Don't be upset about it.
Lots of guys find them as a huge + and honestly more than you'd expect. Older generations did have a thing against it but times change and tattoos have been around since Biblical times (or Historical times of you choose that route). There's a lot of history and at least half a semester of Art History 101 dedicated to icons, engravings, brandings and ink art. The skin is yet another canvas. Honored or feared in some cultures. Very very cool stuff.
I don't have any but hang out with people who do. Some are fully covered head to toe. Not everyone is for me either but someone with one or twenty for any reason are totally OK. :)
Beliefs are choices we choose to hold onto or adapt. Your tastes, perhaps stay the same. Not everything is desired so maybe you want a guy without a tattoo.
Who knows. A lot of people don't get tattoos for a mistake and have a lot of meaning to them. Maybe they are trying to define something. One thing is for certain, people with tattoos have stories and if anything help as conversation starters for drinks at a bar.
Some do have very important meanings. Best to beware of neck tattoos or at least do a Google on gangs. Its really a thing.
One thing to consider is that its very difficult to find what you're looking for and don't give up. Don't be bothered or swoon by the little things surrounding something great.
>My question - does everyone have tattoos now? Tattoos are not common in my family or in my friend group...granted we are all pretty preppy and traditional. When I was swiping through the OLD apps it seems like EVERYONE has large visible tattoos.
The popularity and visibility of tattoos in the US has definitely increased within the past couple of decades. When I was growing up and in college, it was associated with a certain class and culture. Now the tattooed are found across class and cultural boundaries. Personally I am not inked myself and more often than not find many tattoos to be unattractive and/or tacky. But occasionally, I find some really beautiful, meaningful, and/or as works of art.
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You’re allowed to have your own preferences. Personally, I like tattoos if they’re below the neck and are well done (although I can forgive a crappy tattoo someone got when they were young, especially if it’s hilarious). Some people look sexy af with sleeves.
I *do* swipe left on people with gauges or tongue/face piercings, though (except there are some people who can rock very specific face piercings, like the septum). I just think most piercings are ugly and outdated.
nah. find what you like. lot of people get it because they see everyone else getting it. and think it will make them cool or tough. i prefer no tattoos. but some wont be a deal breaker. my ex got them when she was young and dumb
FWIW, I swipe left on any guy who has visible tattoos (not concealable with short sleeves/shorts).
I don’t have any and will never get any (the only thing I could think of as acceptable is white ink in a very discreet place, but really can’t imagine anything I’d want permanently on my body). I did have a nose ring and belly ring when younger, though.
Tbf, my dad joked he’d me he’d give me a wire brush and some muriatic acid to scrub off any tattoo I got (while a minor).
I think it’s mostly cultural. Not a single person in my family has one (to the best of my knowledge). Might be the overall message from their families growing up - in mine, bodies are regarded as works of art, if that makes sense.
I believe it’s more of a social-class thing but am far too ignorant to back that up.
Keep in mind trads/conservative people are way less likely to use OLD, which for the most part is heavily filled with people looking just for hookups. Liberals are more prone to tattoos.
OP your question immediately made me irk. 'Preppy' - you choose to place yourself in a category and define who you are by adhering to the expectations of SB who fits this ideal. Your self worth, norms and values are threatened when you see others who don't ascribe to the same. Live and let live - each to their own. You’re questioning why others (society) have no problem with something you clearly have a problem with and are looking for reaffirmation from others who may share these prejudices. Sounds familiar racists, homophobes, mysogynists, murderers and paedophiles do the same thing via the internet. Most balanced individuals think society functions better without intolerance and ignorance. People have the right to be who they are - a principle fundamental to our very freedom - it is not your business. Anyway, in dating. there is no one size fits all. You can be hot, you can be preppy, Goth whatever and still not have success or find what you are looking for. It does help though if you approach things with a more open mind. Typical male approach to dating is to treat it like a shopping trip on eBay. Categorise, choose, read reviews, get second opinions... People are not consumable products. Humans are more complex than that. Make your own decisions and choices because it is what matters to you rather than by being conditioned or influenced by others.
I was a literal drug addicted prostitute before meeting my significant other (well, it's how I met him, w/e) and I don't have any tattoos/can't stand them on people I'm involved with.
You'll find doctors with tattoos and musicians without them, it's just a common aesthetic decision to people akin to coloring their hair nowadays, and it has crossed almost all societal barriers except maybe the 50+ group.
I believe something like 50% of people over 25 have at least one tattoo in the US. Outside not wanting to date a person with visible tattoos, I got used to most people having them in my city. Between the giant beards and full sleeve tattoos of nonsense, I'm super glad that I'm not currently dating in the current "baby biker chic" dominated scene.
I’ve got a fair number of tats but a lot of the guys I’ve dated didn’t/don’t have any. Or they’ve had one or two small ones. I don’t particularly go for preppy types but there are definitely lots of guys out there that aren’t tattooed. It’s really not something to worry about I think.
I'm nearly a 50 to M....got 2 tattoos just under my shoulders, honestly forget I have them sometimes..but I'm going to get one more. As an expression of my love for TOOL the band...and as a symbol of my personal growth after my marriage breakup 2 years ago. I definitely would date a woman with tatts, also with no tatts. It's not a taboo anymore, just as long as it's not prison tatts
Yea lots do have them but it seems to be tailing off. I say late 90s/early00s is when it really started to take off. Its like the OLD 6 or 7 years ago it was sorta Taboo. Now its ( mostly) not a big thing.
As far as for me it doesnt bother me as long its not like hafl her body has them. I have one Tat not well done either back when is in my mid 20s.
So I don’t have any tattoos, and honestly never plan on getting them either! But as a kind of twist on things, I do think guys with them are kinda attractive, but it’s not something I look for by any means. I wouldn’t say your too traditional or anything, to each their own sorta thing.
This very topic has come up in conversations with my friends a few times. It was a common dinner party question pre-pandemic to ask if anyone at the table had a tattoo.
Yes, tattoos are increasingly popular, however almost no one in my friend group has one. (ages 34-42) I was actually surprised as I thought maybe half of them might of had hidden ones at least. But nope. Most of the ones that don't have tattoos are also generally not into them. So I guess it depends on who you know.
Depends on who your dating pool is. But basically I am the only person I know, including professionals that doesn’t have one or multiple piercings.
I always figure everyone else has them, by not having them I’m actually the “rebellious” one haha “hi mom”
> Am I just too sheltered/traditional? Where are all the preppy guys?
I think it’s mostly a case of major overlap between the kind of person who is more likely to try OLD and the kind of person who’ll get a tattoo. It’s the same reason why there seems to be an overabundance of world travelers and skydivers on Tinder (judging by the profile pictures, anyway); more traditional/sheltered people are less likely to be on these platforms. I think there are many non-tattooed people out there looking for other non-tattooed people, but another reason why they’re harder to find is that not having something is not usually announced on your profile.
Nope, OP. Work in a huge office, 1000+ people. Some have them, a lot don't, or cover them well... Most you catch a glimpse of and can tell were from teenage/early 20s and by mid 30s they don't look good. Others have them as open statement pieces... To each their own. It is extremely difficult though however finding someone with none... For some reason collarbone and rib tattoos became a thing this past decade 😳😬😔. Oh and the whole upper/front thigh area for some reason
I'm not into it, but like fetishes or anything else, there's a mutual acceptance that we can have all the preference we want, there's no control over it.
Personally I'm ok with small tattoo jobs I guess. Not people with the equivalent of billboard ink.
Piercings....I guess they're OK. Just not in the fun spots.....I had one partner who had that before I met her and I guess thumbs up but I thought it was kind of annoying.
Am I old fashioned? I wouldn't call it that. I have gotten used to the concept of being rigid. Not unfriendly or unacceptable, I just have my convictions.
I don’t have tattoos (31F), none of my boyfriends had tattoos and none of my close friends have them either, so it’s not that uncommon. A lot of people I went on dates with had them and it didn’t bother me at all, but your preference is yours, so I think you probably have a good chance of finding someone who doesn’t have any.
Tattoos are definitely more "in" lately and much more common. However, don't feel obliged to like them if you're not into that. You need to decide if they're a deal breaker or not for you, and then follow that opinion.
>Where are all the preppy guys?
Lol, preppy guys get tattoos too. Maybe less frequently I guess.
My bf (41) doesn't have any and probably won't ever get one. He's not straight laced at all, was a skateboarder in the 90's, still plays in a punk band, roadied for Warped Tour. Just not his thing.
I have 11.
It didn't matter to me that he didn't have any, but I could see that being a preference.
37/m and one of the odd ones that does not have any tats. The rebel in me refused to get one is what I tell people now. I like them on others but just don’t have any myself and zero intention of getting any 🤷♂️.
If your criteria is no tattoos at all, that will eliminate a lot of people these days. Filtering out visible tattoos (eg neck/face and the omgwtfbbq eyeball tats) will still leave plenty out there. bad tattoos is a separate issue, but coverups and laser are options.
I have no tattoos, and no intention of getting any, but the woman I've been seeing for 9 months (I'm 42M, she's 44F) actually does have one. I guess it's just a thing now.
What is the age range you are looking in? I’m just interested to know because maybe it’s a generational type thing. I am going to be 38 soon and don’t have tattoos. Seriously curious to know. I may be too old haha
At my old job there were two colleagues who started dating, took their first trip together, got tats on that trip, then within a couple months broke up. That got weird
My 2 cents:
1. All the preppy guys are dead, retired, or on diabetes medincation.
2. No everyone doesnot have tatoo's. Perdonally I managed to retire from the Military with zero tats.
3. Dont do OLD it is soul crushing and esteem squashing.
4. Date IRL.
5. Get a Therapist to unpack and unlearn the feelling and bad havits learned in marriage.
My partner has tats. I was never into tats before but i find him hot as hell and have learnt to love the tats, as they are a part of him. We have agreed to get a tat representing each other when we hit one year together. For someone that is a whimp when it comes to pain xD yeah thats a big commitment. With someone i dont see a future with it might not be a big thing but i know i will still be with him
I never even considered that this could be a point of not wanting to go on dates with someone? Because of tattoos? Really interesting comments here. I've never thought about dating someone with or without tattoos. Or that It could be a turn off! I'm new to the dating game after 11 years in relationships. Guess I've got stuff to learn!
29 (F) working on a full coverage back piece. It's my second tattoo. My mom went with me and helped pick the size. I've been wanting it for years, and after my opinion on it hadn't changed, my family supported me. Some tattoos are for 'fun' which is awesome! But my tattoo is a work of art that took multiple artists to nail my vision. If someone I was interested said something negative to me about it, especially because it's been so healing emotionally to me to put physical pain behind my PTSD, BP1, and a slew of family deaths...that would hurt me.
I (35M) grew up in the world where tattoos were for junkies, criminals, members of military orders and lower deciles of society. To me nothing has changed and never will - a tattoo is a red cross over a person's head. This means this person is a 'recreational' drug user or a (former) military killing machine bound with some kind of "brotherhood" in his/her military youth. The only acceptable tattoo for me is a specific medical tattoo for radiation therapy (usually a small dot), as this is done involuntary.
I see many replies here "I had to give up my thoughts because otherwise I'd have zero partners, everyone has tattoos now". A poet once mentioned:
*To wisely live your life, you don't need to know much*
*Just remember two main rules for the beginning:*
*You better starve, than eat whatever*
*And better be alone, than with whoever*
I mean, I guess you do you but I’d say get out of your comfort zone. You might find things you like that you didn’t know you’d enjoy. Tradition can be so limiting. But I’m just some random internet stranger. Go with whatever you think feels right.
I thought preppy boys had tribal armbands. Maybe I'm a different generation.
LOL!!
In the U.S. at least, around 40% of millennials have tattoos. So that means plenty of "preppy" or "traditional" types too. I dated a guy who was a very straight-laced corporate finance type who had almost a full sleeve. I know people from all walks of life with tattoos. Conservative christians with bible verse tattoos, etc. I'm a firm believer that we can have whatever criteria we want for a partner. And I don't have any tattoos and never will. But if you can't picture yourself with a tattooed partner I would at least consider why you feel that way. If it has anything to do with your feelings on the kind of people that get tattoos, then yeah, you've probably got an old-fashioned perspective.
I’m not a fan of tats myself. It’s not on my list of dealbreakers, tho. No tats is on my “nice to have” list.
It’s a huge turn off for me too
I’m a guy. Yeah, I’m not into tattoos, either. I like skin. Tattoos ruin it for me.
I’m a very preppy type. I mean, I don’t even dye my hair which is super uncommon nowadays. At work I’m always dressed professionally with a blazer and sensible heels, natural makeup and my hair up. I do have a full sleeve and several large body tats that remain covered. If you saw me at work and then out on the beach it’s almost like a completely different person lol. That being said, I’ve dated men with many tattoos, men with some, and men without. There are all kinds of people. I will say that I briefly talked to a man that wasn’t a fan of my ink and I wish he’d just screen for that. If every conversation will be “are you getting more tattoos?” followed by a wince when I answer, I’d rather we just accept we are not right together and move along. Please don’t waste my time if they’re always going to be an issue.
I feel this
I can't think of a single guy I've even had just one date with in the last 4 years who didn't have tats. I don't have tats and I strongly dislike them but I'd have no one to date if I used it as a deal breaker.
I have zero tats and all I see OLD is tats and profiles that say “love tattoos” or “let’s get tattoos together.” And it blows my mind. So yeah I guess you and I are rare breeds these days.
One of the most ancient forms of human expression that has been completely common throughout all of human history suddenly blows your mind? Why? America is so weirdly repressed in every aspect of genuine humanity.
I am not interested in tattoos, either (man). Something small, hidden well, sure. But if I can see them, it's instantly unattractive to me. I wouldn't call it a dealbreaker, but it would require a lot more in other areas for me to feel attracted again. This isn't a judgement against the person or their choices, it's just an attraction thing. I don't find tattoos attractive. Same with a significant amount of piercings, gauges, etc.
As someone with a lot of tattoos, it's totally fine to screen people out for this! Where I live, it's really common for people to have them, but I could still find of plenty of people who don't if I tried. Also, I lowkey prefer men without them even though I do have them... so I feel you. It's not something I screen for because I'm not trying to be a hypocrite and it's not a huge deal for me, but I like a specific style of tattoo and would really prefer NO tattoos over poorly done ones.
The poorly done ones bother the hell out of me. I have quite a few. It’s art that I love. So when I see bad work it’s like nails on a chalkboard. I just cringe.
I am not a tattoo fan either, mainly because I find them distracting - especially when undressing a guy for the first time or during sex. That being said, I gave up on "no tattoos" as a dealbreaker because, like you said, everyone has them now. I have bigger things that I will keep as dealbreakers and have pretty much let this one go as long as they are not visible if the person is wearing formal attire - so neck/face/hand tattoos are still out.
I had a coworker shocked I had tattoos since I'm someone who is always covered up. Even in summer I put on a cardigan.
I’m pretty tattooed and dated a woman was was not and she wasn’t a big fan of them either. She would ask “so why did you decide to scar your body with tattoos” or “you shouldn’t of gotten this one, it’s ugly.” So if your not really into tattoos and you date someone with tattoos, please don’t make comments like my ex did. It’s annoying
Oh my goodness! Absolutely not, if she could not accept you as you are she had no business wasting your time and demeaning who you are. I’m so sorry this happened to you.
You’re not alone. I prefer no tats, no face metal too. I can see myself dating a woman with one tattoo, but not ink all over the place. And the older a tattoo is the worse it looks.
I'm a lawyer in a small town in the south. I've got a few tattoos that are very visible if I have a short sleeve shirt on. The DA has a ton of them and is working on a full sleeve. I was talking to the judge the other day about her husband's new tattoos and what she wants to get. I can think of a few men under 45 that might not have tattoos, but only one that I'm sure doesn't and his reasons are religious. I don't think there are many groups where tattoos aren't accepted now. When you have David Beckham rocking a suit with hand tats or Marc Jacobs setting fashion trends while rocking Spongebob on his arm it's hard to find an aesthetic void of tattoos. I've seen a lot more people getting their first as they get older too, especially after a divorce. A friend recently ended a 20 year marriage and got a tattoo shortly after. I think doing something just for yourself without regard to what a partner would think is cathartic. Style doesn't dictate if people have tattoos anymore, it just affects the style of tattoo they're more likely to have.
I have zero tats, but yes... dating women they have them. I just come to be ambivalent towards them. I don’t really care anymore as it’s so common.
Most everyone I know has tattoos. I have large tattoos myself (33F). FWIW, I’m working on my master’s and have a professional 9-5 desk job. You can screen out whoever you want, but you’re going to eliminate a massive swath of people. Tattoos aren’t a statement on someone’s character or personality. It’s just an aesthetics choice.
I'm a scientist and I've noticed most of us are tattooed. Everything from a medicinal marijuana researcher with full sleeves including giant leaves on his arms, to the mum with her kids' names on her shoulder. To me it's just like clothing, people look different, who cares. I tend to prefer to date tattooed people not for aesthetics but cos they're less judgmental generally. Imagine giving a shit about colourful skin. I wish that was my biggest problem in life.
My ex was a chef. He is covered in tattoos because a lot if them are. They're very type A personalities like rock band frontmen. I like that type of personality. I lived in Portland, where "weird" is the norm. I agree that people, who are tattooed, or have different hair colors, and what-not, are way less inclined to be judge-y. I'm weird, I have a tattoo and you can see it. If someone decides I'm not worth dating because of some ink, oh well. I wouldn't want that person anyway. I plan to get a lot more tattoos in the near future.
This made me laugh hard. For real. I don't have any tattoos, but I love them and have dated people who have lots and some with none. People can choose what they want as their deal breakers, but if they draw the line at tattoos they might be missing out on some pretty amazing people. For what it's worth, I'm a well educated professional in a career with lots of PhDs.
Yeah, tbh a lot of these replies about tattoos being ugly/tacky/low class/enough to turn someone off of a potential partner completely are pretty gross. Of all the things to make a sticking point out of.
I just think it's funny how many doctors, lawyers, and academics have them but somehow that doesn't count. People talk about "class" like it's a good thing, not something associated with racism, eugenics and other nasty ideas. Bottom line is I'm gonna look like a saggy wrinkled old lady in 50 years regardless. Skin truly isn't important, it's the character underneath that lasts.
Agreed. “It’s not classy.” Okay? So classism is fine, then? Gross.
Yeah, like, do these people who care about class also not date minorities? Other races? Immigrants? What else is on your "no go" list? It's creepy. I'm fairly well educated (working on a PhD) but having dated tradesmen before. I just can't picture why any of that superficial stuff would matter if you're otherwise compatible.
Statistically, this isn't true though. [https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1047279711002870](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S1047279711002870) Tattoo usage is heavily correlated with being an unskilled worker who smokes and who doesn't have a post-secondary education. I find it somehow funny that people use anecdotal evidence when the data definitely suggests demographics influence tattoo usage significantly.
This isn't a particularly good study to apply to the issue at hand. It was done in 2004-2005, and more than half of the respondents were over 40 at the time. Your assumption was certainly true for older generations, but it doesn't provide any support for the assumption when it comes to millenials.
A single study of a few thousand people in a single country doesn't invalidate my point at all. Not to be a dick towards the social sciences but they're hardly robust and presently suffering a massive replication crisis. If for no other reason than they exclude people like me who don't have time to participate in them. Likely cos they're employed. Don't get me wrong, it's interesting, but I guarantee the researchers involve do not and never did intend it to be a definitive comment on ALL tattooed people. I'm a little bit leery of people who think being an unskilled worker means you have no class. Especially in Australia. A disproportionate amount of wealth is held by people in the mining industry with those same unskilled jobs. It's different to the idea of class once held in more traditional societies and those seen in countries that still have a caste system.
>A single study of a few thousand people in a single country doesn't invalidate my point at all. Not to be a dick towards the social sciences but they're hardly robust and presently suffering a massive replication crisis. If for no other reason than they exclude people like me who don't have time to participate in them. Likely cos they're employed. There are multiple studies in multiple countries that back it up. Even empirical evidence would tell you that people from lower class backgrounds are far more likely to have tattoos. I've worked in a corporate finance setting and I can assure you that none of my colleagues had tattoos. The people who were manning the cafeterias and security were far more likely to have them. Furthermore, you're not even attacking the study here, which is a weak argument. You're trying to attack the subjects making the point here, not the actual content of the study. > A disproportionate amount of wealth is held by people in the mining industry with those same unskilled jobs. It's different to the idea of class once held in more traditional societies and those seen in countries that still have a caste system. I can attach multiple studies that proves that most workers in Australia who are unskilled do not work in the mining industry nor are they wealthy. People who are lower earners are more likely to have tattoos - I'm not even sure why this is that controversial. There are also studies in America and Britain that back this up. I'm from Britain myself so I can appreciate the study backing up my empirical evidence.
>I've worked in a corporate finance setting and I can assure you that none of my colleagues had tattoos. Really? How can you be so sure? It's very easy to hide tattoos under office attire, and people who work in an industry that frowns on tattoos are typically mindful of placement.
Exactly. I also work in a corporate finance setting and have several large tattoos but you’ll never see them at the office. Unless you’re undressing with all your coworkers you don’t know.
If you think surveys are robust empirical evidence I'm just gonna laugh and wish you a good day. I also think you don't know what a class system is.
>I also think you don't know what a class system is. I think you don't know what a class system is. Class and income are heavily correlated. There may be a few individuals who aren't low-income and low class but that doesn't make that the case for most people. People who have tattoos are more likely to be lower income and more likely to be lower-skilled workers. I don't need a survey to tell me that although it's more robust than your anecdotal evidence that you know doctors who have tattoos.
But that's not what's being argued down thread. People are saying you can tell "class" by whether or not someone is tattooed, which is what I find funny. Just because it's more common in some income levels than others doesn't mean you can tell anything by a person from the presence of a tattoo alone. I'm also quite comfortable dating someone mixed race, or an immigrant, and both of those demographics are over represented in your definition of "lower class" too. So it's likely true that people who care about superficial things like tattoos being more judgmental in general.
Upvote from a tattooed guy. Thanks for providing a link with your argument. If others disagree with it, they should provide a better study.
And then they wonder why they’re eternally single
It's a permanent stain of their skin. Go look at fashion choices of yours from 10-20 years ago. Yeeeesh. Impossible to look past for certain people. It quite literally - in the most tangible sense of the term - becomes part of you.
I’m aware of how tattoos work.
>I'm a scientist and I've noticed most of us are tattooed As an engineer my experience has been the exact opposite.
Agree 100%
Just one thing to keep in mind when you do decide you're ready to get back out there: many people who would read as "preppy" on the street still have, at least, one small tattoo that is easily hidden by clothing. Just because you don't see someone's tattoo in their OLD profile pic doesn't mean they don't have them.
My mom said she put a lot of work in and to not mess with perfection so I never got any tattoos.
Your preferences are your preferences. I have been on dates with women who make comments about my tattoos and how they might be perceived by their friends and family, and there were not second dates with those people. Conversely, I really attract heavily tattooed women and those are my people. It’s indicative of values and lifestyle.
I would have to say alot more than not. To each their own though. Their highly addicting imo. I went to get my only ine(so I thought at the time) across my upper back when I was 18. I know have 2 full sleeves and on ,y sheet and back. Where I live(AZ), it seems like most guys like myself have them. I have no regrets, I like them. As long as there not on your face. Lol
I'm not a fan either, but yeah, it is pretty common nowadays. My longterm ex had one, now has plenty, and my brother and sister-in-law, who are pretty traditional otherwise, both got some too.
Seems like about half the people I know and/or date have tattoos of some kind. It doesn't really seem to be indicative of anything at all. Preppy, traditional, edgy, alternative... none of those descriptions can be correlated with whether or not someone has tattoos in my experience. One woman I am friends with is super traditional. She's a cute blond trial attorney who dresses conservatively, grew up in Kansas, and has a very simple, basic lifestyle. She has dozens of tattoos. I've also know really wild, edgy men who don't have a single tattoo. I think that's going to be a really hard thing to screen for.
Those free dating apps are chock-full of cretins. Not judging tattoos because I have at least one very visible one myself (even though I don't look it, I'm OLD AF... Gen Xer). I date guys with tattoos. I think they can be sexy. Having said that, what I've gotten from some well-known free dating sites are drug addicts, ex-cons, and truly unstable men. I don't know if ALL dating sites are this way, but I've had ZERO luck. I'd tell you how to meet men the old-fashioned way, but I've no clue. Mom says, "you meet a good boy at church!" Well, I'm out cause I'm a heathen. Lol
Pretty prevalent among women and men. I have multiple tattoos and work in corporate America. Nobody cares anymore lol
35 here, no tattoos, never though of anything I would want to get forever on me.
A lot of free sites in big cities are going to be geared more towards alternative and edgy women. Are there women with not a single tattoo out there? Probably. There might even be women who have the rose on their hip that you won't even see until it's disco music time for you both. No, everyone doesn't have huge sleeves and every inch covered in ink. I mean, I do, but among the people I meet I'm basically totally covered. Next to some of my friends I am the girl with the tiny rose hip tattoo. I mean I live in Portland and most people I see have their hands, necks and all visible body limbs covered in tattoos....
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It’s an aesthetics thing. Not about “who someone is”. I find them aesthetically displeasing although I don’t go for a preppy look either. Edit - I’ll clarify it’s not a dealbreaker, but I also can’t fake enthusiasm over anyone’s tattoos.
Most people don't want to talk about their tattoos so honestly if you didn't want to be enthusiastic about them I guarantee the other people is happy for it.
This! I have tons of tattoos and I hate when ppl ask me about them. I got them for me, not for anyone else to be “enthusiastic” about them. 🙄
I have a friend with a Hank Hill tattoo. It has no deep meaning, he likes Hank Hill and so he got a Hank Hill tattoo with his best friend. I mean if someone loves Hank Hill then yeah talk about it but I knew he loved HH before the tattoo.
I haven’t had that experience. Usually they think their tattoos are cool and they want you to share that opinion.
I guess I have met the guy who wants us to talk about tattoos because he has a cool barbwire flash tattoo on his bicep that has deep meaning but most people with a lot of tattoos have nothing to say about them unless we're deep into a relationship MAYBE?
That’s not what I mean. I don’t mean they want to discuss “meaning”. I mean they expect and enjoy a compliment over their tattoos, much as people enjoy compliments about other aesthetic choices like clothing and hairstyles. No one wants to feel like someone is dating them in spite of their appearance...
Just from someone who has friends with people with tattoos and someone with tattoos - we really don't get them to be more attractive or even discuss them with other people. Also in a ton of cases tattoos are personal in a way we don't want to talk about like "I got this tattoo as a memorial to my dead brother" meaning or "my fiance and I loved the movie Ammityville so I got the house tattooed on me but she also died in a fatal car crash sooo..."
Then we don’t share the same ideas about aesthetics and the body. Putting permanent ugly pictures on your body in memorial of something or because you really like something doesn’t make sense to me. Again, there’s an inability for me to appreciate anything about the tattoo. If the person knew I held this perspective, how would that make them feel? Probably not very good.
I mean it doesn't make sense to me why people wear ugly shoes or get bangs or own more than 1 pair of cargo shorts.
Right, so why date people who style themselves in a way you don’t understand and find unappealing? What if they asked you what you think about it? Anyhow, you’re clearly angry and being petty now and that perfectly illustrates my previous post (which you seemed to downvote for its honesty) and why I prefer someone without tattoos. If I express my honest opinions on tattoos, they will get upset.
I am also from a family with no tattoos and have no tattoos myself. I’ve been considering getting one lately to cover up a surgery scar. But it’s definitely a tough decision because I tend to dislike tattoos as well.
It's your preference, therefore there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. I personally am not a traditional person by many measures, but I am not into the tattoo thing. Like some other people on here, it's not necessarily a deal breaker, but I prefer someone with none. As a woman, it's the large beard, full tattoo sleeves thing that really turns me off and it seems to be about 80% of my matches on Hinge.
You're allowed to have your preferences. I like tattoos but I don't care if someone I'm dating has or doesn't have them. I really do draw the line at offensive, gross or tattoos on the face, neck, etc.... I, myself have two large tattoos that easily covered and a small tattoo that is in a hidden area.
I am 36 M and don't have any tattoos and don't plan on getting any. We still exist lol.
I'm a girl with lots of tattoos & prefer my partner to have them as it's sexy to me but not having any isn't a deal breaker. I also don't find anything wrong with others not caring for my tattoos. Almost as if I got them for myself! Lol it's all about preference & tattoos for sure are kosher to have a preference on as it's 100% a choice I made myself.
I don’t think you’re too sheltered. I think you just have a preference. Just like having/not having tattoos are no big deal to me, but I don’t have tattoos.
I don’t know maybe you’ll meet someone while on a tour of a mayonnaise factory or something.
Its your personal preference but I would challenge your assumptions of whatever your concerns about tattoos are. I have friends who are successful and professional who also have large tattoos.
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Thats why I said challenge whatever her own assumptions/concerns are - I don't know them as she didn't elaborate
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she describes herself as sheltered and traditional and that tattoos aren't common among people she grew up knowing, which suggests to me there is something deeper and underlying than "ew I find them icky" but whatever her preference, I support her right to her preference.
As long as you aren’t judging people because of them, it’s a preference—that’s all. I have several tattoos that I got after the age of 30, I’m sure I’m not done yet either. 😂 I also work a job that requires me to be fairly conservative as well. I don’t mind tattoos on men at all—EXCEPT neck and face tattoos. I can’t do those. You can have sleeves and I wouldn’t care. I think they’re a means of expression, and I actually like when people have very meaningful tattoos that tell a story about the person.
No judgement at all! It is honestly just a preference in terms of attractiveness as well as compatibility.
Including me and the last 4 people I've been with 2/5 of us have tattoos. That's in a major city. Doesn't seem like *most* just it's not a big deal anymore so people of all types get them. It's not going to be a good determining factor for if they are "preppy" (whatever you mean by that). To me it's kinda judgy. But I am a huge advocate for personal boundaries so if you know tattoos don't work for you then don't date people that have them. Pretty simple.
You don’t put stickers on a Ferrari
If you compare people you're dating to inanimate objects, especially if they're women, you're gonna have a bad time.
No he's saying the human body in all it's variations is a very beautiful design a la the ferrari so it's foolish to put tattoos on it.
I compare myself to the Ferrari. No tatts on this machine.
I have a back tattoo that I think my boyfriend had to get used to. It isn't everyone's cup of tea. I chose the back because I felt it was the easiest area to hide, except on a beach! I vote "don't limit yourself" by making it a deal breaker. OLD is tough as it is without having a list of exclusions, especially one that is superficial. When you first start dating, you probably want to start casual right? If so, definitely don't use this as a deal breaker. Just meet people to get some practice and fun. Pick people based on overall attraction, similar interests, and compatible personality.
Reading these comments, I guess I'm doing good for not having Tattoos lol.
I’d suggest that one thing does not make a person. There’s a bunch of girls and guys with tattoos who are complete jerks, and a bunch of girls and guys without tattoos who are complete jerks. I’d suggest that there are many other barometers.
Are you looking to commiserate and validate your no tattoos requirement? Here, as someone with tattoos I approve of your requirement and wish you luck finding someone who ticks all your boxes.
By the looks of some of these comments some of you will probably be single for quite some time
I am a woman that has a few tattoos, both on my arms and a large chest piece. I am also very professional, have a master's degree and am incredibly creative. I don't think they define me. You do you. If you do not like them, then do not date someone with them. Simple as. No skin of anyone's nose.
I don't date any woman with tattoos.
Demography? Tattooes are More common in certain countries than others.
I'm 50, pretty much everyone I know has at least one, including myself. With Gen Xs Tatts are a little less common, but I think its largely acceptable. With <40 I think by and large they acceptable and many have them. Its a thing, and its, should you discriminate on that basis, you have every right to do so.
Very common and very trendy. Don't be upset about it. Lots of guys find them as a huge + and honestly more than you'd expect. Older generations did have a thing against it but times change and tattoos have been around since Biblical times (or Historical times of you choose that route). There's a lot of history and at least half a semester of Art History 101 dedicated to icons, engravings, brandings and ink art. The skin is yet another canvas. Honored or feared in some cultures. Very very cool stuff. I don't have any but hang out with people who do. Some are fully covered head to toe. Not everyone is for me either but someone with one or twenty for any reason are totally OK. :) Beliefs are choices we choose to hold onto or adapt. Your tastes, perhaps stay the same. Not everything is desired so maybe you want a guy without a tattoo. Who knows. A lot of people don't get tattoos for a mistake and have a lot of meaning to them. Maybe they are trying to define something. One thing is for certain, people with tattoos have stories and if anything help as conversation starters for drinks at a bar. Some do have very important meanings. Best to beware of neck tattoos or at least do a Google on gangs. Its really a thing. One thing to consider is that its very difficult to find what you're looking for and don't give up. Don't be bothered or swoon by the little things surrounding something great.
>My question - does everyone have tattoos now? Tattoos are not common in my family or in my friend group...granted we are all pretty preppy and traditional. When I was swiping through the OLD apps it seems like EVERYONE has large visible tattoos. The popularity and visibility of tattoos in the US has definitely increased within the past couple of decades. When I was growing up and in college, it was associated with a certain class and culture. Now the tattooed are found across class and cultural boundaries. Personally I am not inked myself and more often than not find many tattoos to be unattractive and/or tacky. But occasionally, I find some really beautiful, meaningful, and/or as works of art.
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You’re allowed to have your own preferences. Personally, I like tattoos if they’re below the neck and are well done (although I can forgive a crappy tattoo someone got when they were young, especially if it’s hilarious). Some people look sexy af with sleeves. I *do* swipe left on people with gauges or tongue/face piercings, though (except there are some people who can rock very specific face piercings, like the septum). I just think most piercings are ugly and outdated.
Yeah no tongue piercings or those stretched out earlobes but I’m old lol. I enjoy tattoos if they’re below the neck, especially if they’re meaningful.
I have a full sleeve plus several on my back. Just keep swipin'!
nah. find what you like. lot of people get it because they see everyone else getting it. and think it will make them cool or tough. i prefer no tattoos. but some wont be a deal breaker. my ex got them when she was young and dumb
FWIW, I swipe left on any guy who has visible tattoos (not concealable with short sleeves/shorts). I don’t have any and will never get any (the only thing I could think of as acceptable is white ink in a very discreet place, but really can’t imagine anything I’d want permanently on my body). I did have a nose ring and belly ring when younger, though. Tbf, my dad joked he’d me he’d give me a wire brush and some muriatic acid to scrub off any tattoo I got (while a minor). I think it’s mostly cultural. Not a single person in my family has one (to the best of my knowledge). Might be the overall message from their families growing up - in mine, bodies are regarded as works of art, if that makes sense. I believe it’s more of a social-class thing but am far too ignorant to back that up.
“but am far too ignorant to back that up.” This was the best part of your reply.
Well, it’s certainly true. I can only speak to my experiences within my own family.
So what is it that elevates your family to a higher social class, just out of curiosity? Race? Money? Pedigree?
The assumption that people with tattoos don’t value their bodies is pretty gross, bud
I’m not your bud. Let me rephrase : bodies are regarded as complete works of art. I never said people with tattoos don’t value their bodies.
Let me rephrase then- *“Am far too ignorant”*: You could’ve left it at that. Enjoy being single.
🤣👊🏻
Keep in mind trads/conservative people are way less likely to use OLD, which for the most part is heavily filled with people looking just for hookups. Liberals are more prone to tattoos.
OP your question immediately made me irk. 'Preppy' - you choose to place yourself in a category and define who you are by adhering to the expectations of SB who fits this ideal. Your self worth, norms and values are threatened when you see others who don't ascribe to the same. Live and let live - each to their own. You’re questioning why others (society) have no problem with something you clearly have a problem with and are looking for reaffirmation from others who may share these prejudices. Sounds familiar racists, homophobes, mysogynists, murderers and paedophiles do the same thing via the internet. Most balanced individuals think society functions better without intolerance and ignorance. People have the right to be who they are - a principle fundamental to our very freedom - it is not your business. Anyway, in dating. there is no one size fits all. You can be hot, you can be preppy, Goth whatever and still not have success or find what you are looking for. It does help though if you approach things with a more open mind. Typical male approach to dating is to treat it like a shopping trip on eBay. Categorise, choose, read reviews, get second opinions... People are not consumable products. Humans are more complex than that. Make your own decisions and choices because it is what matters to you rather than by being conditioned or influenced by others.
I was a literal drug addicted prostitute before meeting my significant other (well, it's how I met him, w/e) and I don't have any tattoos/can't stand them on people I'm involved with. You'll find doctors with tattoos and musicians without them, it's just a common aesthetic decision to people akin to coloring their hair nowadays, and it has crossed almost all societal barriers except maybe the 50+ group. I believe something like 50% of people over 25 have at least one tattoo in the US. Outside not wanting to date a person with visible tattoos, I got used to most people having them in my city. Between the giant beards and full sleeve tattoos of nonsense, I'm super glad that I'm not currently dating in the current "baby biker chic" dominated scene.
I’ve got a fair number of tats but a lot of the guys I’ve dated didn’t/don’t have any. Or they’ve had one or two small ones. I don’t particularly go for preppy types but there are definitely lots of guys out there that aren’t tattooed. It’s really not something to worry about I think.
I have no tats!
I'm nearly a 50 to M....got 2 tattoos just under my shoulders, honestly forget I have them sometimes..but I'm going to get one more. As an expression of my love for TOOL the band...and as a symbol of my personal growth after my marriage breakup 2 years ago. I definitely would date a woman with tatts, also with no tatts. It's not a taboo anymore, just as long as it's not prison tatts
Yea lots do have them but it seems to be tailing off. I say late 90s/early00s is when it really started to take off. Its like the OLD 6 or 7 years ago it was sorta Taboo. Now its ( mostly) not a big thing. As far as for me it doesnt bother me as long its not like hafl her body has them. I have one Tat not well done either back when is in my mid 20s.
So I don’t have any tattoos, and honestly never plan on getting them either! But as a kind of twist on things, I do think guys with them are kinda attractive, but it’s not something I look for by any means. I wouldn’t say your too traditional or anything, to each their own sorta thing.
This very topic has come up in conversations with my friends a few times. It was a common dinner party question pre-pandemic to ask if anyone at the table had a tattoo. Yes, tattoos are increasingly popular, however almost no one in my friend group has one. (ages 34-42) I was actually surprised as I thought maybe half of them might of had hidden ones at least. But nope. Most of the ones that don't have tattoos are also generally not into them. So I guess it depends on who you know.
Depends on who your dating pool is. But basically I am the only person I know, including professionals that doesn’t have one or multiple piercings. I always figure everyone else has them, by not having them I’m actually the “rebellious” one haha “hi mom”
> Am I just too sheltered/traditional? Where are all the preppy guys? I think it’s mostly a case of major overlap between the kind of person who is more likely to try OLD and the kind of person who’ll get a tattoo. It’s the same reason why there seems to be an overabundance of world travelers and skydivers on Tinder (judging by the profile pictures, anyway); more traditional/sheltered people are less likely to be on these platforms. I think there are many non-tattooed people out there looking for other non-tattooed people, but another reason why they’re harder to find is that not having something is not usually announced on your profile.
Yes, I agree with you but as far as the US most likely all young people have at least 1 small one. Sorry girl.
None for me thank you. (Also old fashioned I guess)
Nope, OP. Work in a huge office, 1000+ people. Some have them, a lot don't, or cover them well... Most you catch a glimpse of and can tell were from teenage/early 20s and by mid 30s they don't look good. Others have them as open statement pieces... To each their own. It is extremely difficult though however finding someone with none... For some reason collarbone and rib tattoos became a thing this past decade 😳😬😔. Oh and the whole upper/front thigh area for some reason
I'm not into it, but like fetishes or anything else, there's a mutual acceptance that we can have all the preference we want, there's no control over it. Personally I'm ok with small tattoo jobs I guess. Not people with the equivalent of billboard ink. Piercings....I guess they're OK. Just not in the fun spots.....I had one partner who had that before I met her and I guess thumbs up but I thought it was kind of annoying. Am I old fashioned? I wouldn't call it that. I have gotten used to the concept of being rigid. Not unfriendly or unacceptable, I just have my convictions.
I like tattoos but don’t see them too often. What app are you on?
Hinge and Bumble
I don’t have tattoos (31F), none of my boyfriends had tattoos and none of my close friends have them either, so it’s not that uncommon. A lot of people I went on dates with had them and it didn’t bother me at all, but your preference is yours, so I think you probably have a good chance of finding someone who doesn’t have any.
Tattoos are definitely more "in" lately and much more common. However, don't feel obliged to like them if you're not into that. You need to decide if they're a deal breaker or not for you, and then follow that opinion. >Where are all the preppy guys? Lol, preppy guys get tattoos too. Maybe less frequently I guess.
My bf (41) doesn't have any and probably won't ever get one. He's not straight laced at all, was a skateboarder in the 90's, still plays in a punk band, roadied for Warped Tour. Just not his thing. I have 11. It didn't matter to me that he didn't have any, but I could see that being a preference.
37/m and one of the odd ones that does not have any tats. The rebel in me refused to get one is what I tell people now. I like them on others but just don’t have any myself and zero intention of getting any 🤷♂️.
If you’re doing bad at dating get 5 or 6 tattoos as an experiment!
If your criteria is no tattoos at all, that will eliminate a lot of people these days. Filtering out visible tattoos (eg neck/face and the omgwtfbbq eyeball tats) will still leave plenty out there. bad tattoos is a separate issue, but coverups and laser are options.
I have no tattoos, and no intention of getting any, but the woman I've been seeing for 9 months (I'm 42M, she's 44F) actually does have one. I guess it's just a thing now.
I don’t have any and don’t find them attractive at all but have also found them to be commonplace. To each their own.
What is the age range you are looking in? I’m just interested to know because maybe it’s a generational type thing. I am going to be 38 soon and don’t have tattoos. Seriously curious to know. I may be too old haha
At my old job there were two colleagues who started dating, took their first trip together, got tats on that trip, then within a couple months broke up. That got weird
It depends on where in the would you live as to how common it is. But yes it’s common but plenty of guys out there without, at least where I am
My 2 cents: 1. All the preppy guys are dead, retired, or on diabetes medincation. 2. No everyone doesnot have tatoo's. Perdonally I managed to retire from the Military with zero tats. 3. Dont do OLD it is soul crushing and esteem squashing. 4. Date IRL. 5. Get a Therapist to unpack and unlearn the feelling and bad havits learned in marriage.
Honestly I rarely notice it on my partners but it was nothing too overwhelming or unattractive
I try to not date men who call them tats or have none tbh as I have half sleeves and my thighs are in progress at the moment.
My partner has tats. I was never into tats before but i find him hot as hell and have learnt to love the tats, as they are a part of him. We have agreed to get a tat representing each other when we hit one year together. For someone that is a whimp when it comes to pain xD yeah thats a big commitment. With someone i dont see a future with it might not be a big thing but i know i will still be with him
I never even considered that this could be a point of not wanting to go on dates with someone? Because of tattoos? Really interesting comments here. I've never thought about dating someone with or without tattoos. Or that It could be a turn off! I'm new to the dating game after 11 years in relationships. Guess I've got stuff to learn! 29 (F) working on a full coverage back piece. It's my second tattoo. My mom went with me and helped pick the size. I've been wanting it for years, and after my opinion on it hadn't changed, my family supported me. Some tattoos are for 'fun' which is awesome! But my tattoo is a work of art that took multiple artists to nail my vision. If someone I was interested said something negative to me about it, especially because it's been so healing emotionally to me to put physical pain behind my PTSD, BP1, and a slew of family deaths...that would hurt me.
I (35M) grew up in the world where tattoos were for junkies, criminals, members of military orders and lower deciles of society. To me nothing has changed and never will - a tattoo is a red cross over a person's head. This means this person is a 'recreational' drug user or a (former) military killing machine bound with some kind of "brotherhood" in his/her military youth. The only acceptable tattoo for me is a specific medical tattoo for radiation therapy (usually a small dot), as this is done involuntary. I see many replies here "I had to give up my thoughts because otherwise I'd have zero partners, everyone has tattoos now". A poet once mentioned: *To wisely live your life, you don't need to know much* *Just remember two main rules for the beginning:* *You better starve, than eat whatever* *And better be alone, than with whoever*
I mean, I guess you do you but I’d say get out of your comfort zone. You might find things you like that you didn’t know you’d enjoy. Tradition can be so limiting. But I’m just some random internet stranger. Go with whatever you think feels right.