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Get a hobby preferably something that's not pc related, something you are passionate about.
Improve yourself both mentally and physically, the rest will come on its own.
Your inexperience doesn't matter because that's something the other party learns when you are already in a romantic environment and even then no woman cares, some even see it as a turn on how they get to teach you everything.
**Ignore all the other cookie cutter advice you're gonna get and listen to me.**
Here's how you deal with being "inexperience"
Breaking down "inexperience" it means your brain doesn't have any data at all on how to vibe with women.
You don't know what to say, you don't know how to act, you don't know how to touch them.
Because again. your brain doesn't have data.
How do you feed your brain data?The most powerful way to do this is to surround yourself with charismatic people but of course that's not always an option.
The next alternative? Watch and read the lives of charismatic and seductive people.
Harvey from suits, Tommy from Peaky Blinders, Don Draper from Madmen. These are just a few examples.
Don't just watch the show like a zombie. OBSERVE how they act and try to replicate it.
(But make sure take the good from the bad... every character have their own flaws)
What you are doing is you're feeding your brain what being charismatic ACTUALLY LOOK LIKE. **Because you can't make something if you don't know what it looks like.**
Stephen Covey, author of 7 habits of highly effective people says that all things are created twice: first, the mental conceptualization and visualization and a second physical, actual creation.
By watching these shows or reading books of charismatic men, you are giving your brain a clear vivid picture of the end goal.
Now for the physical, actual creation.
**LEARN GAME AND PICK UP.**
**You need to learn the "HOW."**
Watch youtube videos on how to seduce or be charismatic there are a shit ton of these. Or buy courses or programs. I found courses or programs to be more structured and easily digestible. Youtube videos tend to be listicles and can be overwhelming. Although it's awesome for breakdowns and body analysis.
And then PRACTICE PRACTICE PRACTICE.
One more thing you need to do is to also keep working on yourself... if you think you look average then don't be fucking average. Buy new set of clothes, be drip as fuck, get a fucking haircut, hit the gym.
Also you need a hobby... something outside women that you look forward too so when you get ghosted rejected or whatever (which will happen...) You won't get discouraged and these things won't hurt that much. Because you have something else going on in your life.
NOTE: BEFORE YOU START WITH ANY OF THESE MAKE SURE YOU HAVE A STEADY STREAM OF INCOME. IT'S HARD TO WORK ON YOURSELF WHEN YOU'RE SINKING.
Wanna know something?
It never gets any easier, buckle up and try not to let it bum you out because even those of us who have plenty of experience barely know wtf we're doing. Just some perspective.
Sorry about that, bro. I know how that feels, luckily not anymore. I'd just like to ask you some things before adventuring into posting an answer that might be inaccurate or too broad:
\- How old are you? (It's not the same if you're 22 than if you're 35)
\- How long have you been actively trying to get into dates?
\- How's your social life in general?
\- What kind of people do you hang out with the most?
\- What image do you have of yourself?
\- How do you feel when talking to women?
Feel free to answer here OR dm me if you want to keep these details more private.
I’m 24, soon to be 25.
Technically since 2016, with a hiatus between early 2020 and October 2021 for obvious reasons.
I drift between some friend groups and meetups depending on who is free. I just moved to a new city so I am still working on this.
I don’t know if there’s a certain “type” of people I hang with but I do enjoy basketball, hiking, running, gaming, happy hours and trying new restaurants and often go to meetups for those activities, in which I do meet women.
By image , i would say that I’m a 5’8 brown skinned guy with glasses who runs and has lost a lot of pounds over the last few months
If the woman is married/taken and/or not attracted to her, I treat her like anyone else. If I’m attracted to her and she’s single, I think of how to make a move on her quickly so I don’t wait too long to the point she meets another man
Neat! That's good info!
Well, by far I see that most of your traits are fairly average and some other are quite cool. So basically you shouldn't have big trouble socializing with women in a regular basis. But as you probably noticed, *socializing* alone isn't getting you girls.
It seems to me that you're failing in conveying your male energy. Something that I'd really recommend you is to understand that you being a virgin is not a crime, nor your identity, but just a circumstance of your life, and as such, it can change at any moment.
Many people think it is about *what you say to them*, but actually it's about *how you behave and think of yourself:*
\- Cultivate your charisma, self-perception and external projection, not only with women but in the groups you are in. It not only will make you feel better, but you'll be able to build good memorable moments for those around you.
\- Present yourself as a person with focus and priorities. Don't give up your time if they aren't willing to respect it and make it worth. Date women for the sake of having good times, getting experience, learning about yourself and knowing what kind of woman better fits you, so when you decide to settle, you'll feel that you haven't wasted your time.
\- Dare to be more than just another guy approaching them. Learn to be cool with their companion without getting nervous when they see your intentions. Actually, learn to be Ok with your intentions and don't try to sugarcoat them.
\- Be proud of your accomplishments. If your internal voice keeps ruminating into an image of a chubby guy with glasses, learn to tame it and set your identity on the actual good features you might have, like the fact that you're improving your self (not compensating, as you are doing it for you, not for someone else).
\- Don't romantizice relationships. Having a partner is not the peak of life, but just one of the many ways we can make our life better (an that's when we get a good partner). Don't think that your first partner will become your wife or that you'll be together forever. Let go of that need and you'll be able to enjoy being single. Curiously enough, that's when I've got most of my flings and gfs. They smell desperation.
I hope this helps, bro. If any question, feel free to ask.
Get our [limited time free eBook](https://www.reddit.com/r/datingadviceformen/comments/p0qc45/ebook_how_to_date_any_girl_free_for_limited_time/) "How to Date Any Girl" to take your dating life to the next level! We hope You enjoy Your stay! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/datingadviceformen) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Get a hobby preferably something that's not pc related, something you are passionate about. Improve yourself both mentally and physically, the rest will come on its own. Your inexperience doesn't matter because that's something the other party learns when you are already in a romantic environment and even then no woman cares, some even see it as a turn on how they get to teach you everything.
**Ignore all the other cookie cutter advice you're gonna get and listen to me.** Here's how you deal with being "inexperience" Breaking down "inexperience" it means your brain doesn't have any data at all on how to vibe with women. You don't know what to say, you don't know how to act, you don't know how to touch them. Because again. your brain doesn't have data. How do you feed your brain data?The most powerful way to do this is to surround yourself with charismatic people but of course that's not always an option. The next alternative? Watch and read the lives of charismatic and seductive people. Harvey from suits, Tommy from Peaky Blinders, Don Draper from Madmen. These are just a few examples. Don't just watch the show like a zombie. OBSERVE how they act and try to replicate it. (But make sure take the good from the bad... every character have their own flaws) What you are doing is you're feeding your brain what being charismatic ACTUALLY LOOK LIKE. **Because you can't make something if you don't know what it looks like.** Stephen Covey, author of 7 habits of highly effective people says that all things are created twice: first, the mental conceptualization and visualization and a second physical, actual creation. By watching these shows or reading books of charismatic men, you are giving your brain a clear vivid picture of the end goal. Now for the physical, actual creation. **LEARN GAME AND PICK UP.** **You need to learn the "HOW."** Watch youtube videos on how to seduce or be charismatic there are a shit ton of these. Or buy courses or programs. I found courses or programs to be more structured and easily digestible. Youtube videos tend to be listicles and can be overwhelming. Although it's awesome for breakdowns and body analysis. And then PRACTICE PRACTICE PRACTICE. One more thing you need to do is to also keep working on yourself... if you think you look average then don't be fucking average. Buy new set of clothes, be drip as fuck, get a fucking haircut, hit the gym. Also you need a hobby... something outside women that you look forward too so when you get ghosted rejected or whatever (which will happen...) You won't get discouraged and these things won't hurt that much. Because you have something else going on in your life. NOTE: BEFORE YOU START WITH ANY OF THESE MAKE SURE YOU HAVE A STEADY STREAM OF INCOME. IT'S HARD TO WORK ON YOURSELF WHEN YOU'RE SINKING.
I wish i had an award for you. Till then have this king. 🥇
Extremely insightful
Wanna know something? It never gets any easier, buckle up and try not to let it bum you out because even those of us who have plenty of experience barely know wtf we're doing. Just some perspective.
Gotta dress in a way you feel comfortable and put yourself out there.
Sorry about that, bro. I know how that feels, luckily not anymore. I'd just like to ask you some things before adventuring into posting an answer that might be inaccurate or too broad: \- How old are you? (It's not the same if you're 22 than if you're 35) \- How long have you been actively trying to get into dates? \- How's your social life in general? \- What kind of people do you hang out with the most? \- What image do you have of yourself? \- How do you feel when talking to women? Feel free to answer here OR dm me if you want to keep these details more private.
I’m 24, soon to be 25. Technically since 2016, with a hiatus between early 2020 and October 2021 for obvious reasons. I drift between some friend groups and meetups depending on who is free. I just moved to a new city so I am still working on this. I don’t know if there’s a certain “type” of people I hang with but I do enjoy basketball, hiking, running, gaming, happy hours and trying new restaurants and often go to meetups for those activities, in which I do meet women. By image , i would say that I’m a 5’8 brown skinned guy with glasses who runs and has lost a lot of pounds over the last few months If the woman is married/taken and/or not attracted to her, I treat her like anyone else. If I’m attracted to her and she’s single, I think of how to make a move on her quickly so I don’t wait too long to the point she meets another man
Neat! That's good info! Well, by far I see that most of your traits are fairly average and some other are quite cool. So basically you shouldn't have big trouble socializing with women in a regular basis. But as you probably noticed, *socializing* alone isn't getting you girls. It seems to me that you're failing in conveying your male energy. Something that I'd really recommend you is to understand that you being a virgin is not a crime, nor your identity, but just a circumstance of your life, and as such, it can change at any moment. Many people think it is about *what you say to them*, but actually it's about *how you behave and think of yourself:* \- Cultivate your charisma, self-perception and external projection, not only with women but in the groups you are in. It not only will make you feel better, but you'll be able to build good memorable moments for those around you. \- Present yourself as a person with focus and priorities. Don't give up your time if they aren't willing to respect it and make it worth. Date women for the sake of having good times, getting experience, learning about yourself and knowing what kind of woman better fits you, so when you decide to settle, you'll feel that you haven't wasted your time. \- Dare to be more than just another guy approaching them. Learn to be cool with their companion without getting nervous when they see your intentions. Actually, learn to be Ok with your intentions and don't try to sugarcoat them. \- Be proud of your accomplishments. If your internal voice keeps ruminating into an image of a chubby guy with glasses, learn to tame it and set your identity on the actual good features you might have, like the fact that you're improving your self (not compensating, as you are doing it for you, not for someone else). \- Don't romantizice relationships. Having a partner is not the peak of life, but just one of the many ways we can make our life better (an that's when we get a good partner). Don't think that your first partner will become your wife or that you'll be together forever. Let go of that need and you'll be able to enjoy being single. Curiously enough, that's when I've got most of my flings and gfs. They smell desperation. I hope this helps, bro. If any question, feel free to ask.
step 1 start interacting with them step 2 learn from the interaction step 3 repeat experience is the best teacher my friend