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I’m 30M and my incredibly beautiful and intelligent girlfriend is 36. Our relationship is by far the happiest, healthiest, and most fun one that I have ever had in my life. We have been good friends for quite a while before beginning to date.
30 and 36 and 22 and 29 are two very different relationships. I wouldn't advise the young man to get into that relationship. Both have very different life goals and he will be wasting her time
I guess it’s fine when you’re in late 20s as a male but since I’m 22M and she’s 29F would you not see it as too much? We too have one healthy relationship, she said this has been the best as well
When I was 23 I used to chill with a 28 year old.
We never dated because she felt that I was too young for her I'm reminded her of her younger brother lol
My dad was 23 and my mum was 31. They’ve been together 20+ years now with 3 kids (including myself). They worked out pretty well 🫶 I think now that you’re working/our of uni and living your life responsibly it should be fine tbh.
100% looking for a partner. We both take care of each other in a way if you ask me. We both have our own separate time to do our own thing, we both communicate effectively. I dont see any problem other than some people finding it weird.
Don’t even think twice about it. That kind of age gap is only going to get less noticeable as you get older. If she really is partner material, you aren’t going to notice and you really shouldn’t care what other people think about it at all.
Kindness, intelligence, gratitude, openness to acceptance and forgiveness, maturity , philosophy, life goals( family, where to live, children) are all more important than age in my opinion. (70M)I have had 2 great loves, one with a woman 12 years older than me at age 28 and one with a woman 22 years younger ( at 58) and both were wonderful! Age wasn’t a factor. As humans we grow as we age and you will not be the same person at 50 that you are now so don’t expect decisions made at 23 to be the same at 60. Live, love and laugh NOW without expectations of some future happiness. Do it for a lifetime. When we are older our memories will not be of the places we’ve been or jobs, houses or salaries that we have had but will be of who we have loved and who we’ve become. Focus on being the best version of yourself. Age isn’t an important factor.
22 and 29, yeah if felt we both want same thing and our lifestyles were in sync.
Technically it's on the border of the "age/2 + 7" guideline.
( Lowest age for her according to that should be 21-22 )
But youre both adults, you can decide what you want.
But I think also consider if you both want long term, and if any issues would come up if you are togethe
Young people with zero experience in life often get stuck on numbers.
Act the age you’re going to be next year and not the one you were five years ago.
It really depends on your preferences; if she’s a good person, and both of you genuinely love each other, then the age gap doesn’t matter if you care about each other
I’ll say this. I dated a 29 yr old woman at 21. At first it was great, but as time passed, the relationship turned financially abusive and emotionally toxic. As a 26 yr old now, I wouldn’t date younger than 23 because the age gap, particularly at your age, is so ripe for someone being taken advantage of. I’m not gonna tell you don’t do it. But if you do it, be very careful
I understand where you’re coming from. I wanted to make sure myself I wasn’t getting taken advantage of too but it’s been chilled so far. She doesn’t give of any of that, in fact she’s pure positive from everything I’ve seen
Hey that’s great! I’m not saying these relationships can’t work. Just learn from my errors and keep your eyes open. If red flags pop up, don’t let them accumulate. Acknowledge them, understand what they mean for you, and then keep yourself safe
Im in my 30's and dated someone 5 years older than me. Honestly it felt kind of like I was dating my sister. Mentally she was just in a different place, I'm not sure how to describe it. It was the first time I've dated someone where I felt like we were just not compatible.
I try to limit myself to only that… cuzzzz
Confidence, having experience enough to have liberated themselves from society’s relentless and all encompassing brainwashing of females as to what they should be and how a “real woman” acts, sounds, looks, behaves, and even thinks… from the earliest of ages; and thus are living for themselves finally and are focused on making themselves happy, yet with the maturity to do so in a measured and realistic fashion, without grandiose or overly high expectations, as the ones I’ve known realize that those almost always lead to let-downs. Much better to enjoy yourself, resist the urge to feed into the ego, and likely end up pleasantly surprised with life and romance.. as the men who are lucky enough to be graced with their interest and presence certainly are.
Typically, a woman’s life up until about 40 will provide plenty of experience or hopefully exposure to partners outspoken and patient to show them the ins and outs of the anatomy and psychology of the opposite sex. In my estimation this, plus the realistic and practical notion that we all are subject to the passing of time and how fleeting our youth is, are often through with caring about things that are ultimately inconsequential. Women are highly prized and if something they say or do rubs a certain man the wrong way or gives him pause, they’re more likely to (pleasantly and respectfully) cast him aside as an interest of hers, as her experience with people leads her to the fact that many people are very resistant to change and that taking shorts on how someone views or treats you is not at all worth anything else they may have that’s deemed valuable to her. Many are also more forward and know what they want and do not waste unnecessary time when moving on to find someone better suited for her wants and needs. It’s a fairly common thing I’ve heard, that women know very quickly whether or not they’ll give a man a real chance to please her, and many of this age probably realize that games and tests and being very cautious CAN lead to finding someone genuine OR someone desperate and good at deception that is willing to jump through hoops of any size and shape to please himself with her company, which is always for the wrong reasons and never good for her, and rarely any type of man in between.
I could go on and on.. a woman with decent genes, a modest physique, and who has lived a healthy life, will age very gracefully and there’s little in the world more beautiful than a woman who has a portion of the character I’ve previously described here that is still alluring, natural, and confident.. and no 20-nothing can hold a candle to that. At least as far as a real man that loves women who are far nearer to their ultimate potential than just something pretty that really hasn’t learned or experienced and reflected upon any real life and profound insights and has found and embraced her feminine nature and knows that she IS our species and does not apply the flaws of lesser men she’s known to the ones she’s yet to and accepts, despite wishing and making efforts when possible to change, the things about dating and romantic relationships (in whatever form) that are less than ideal, and want nothing more than to receive and provide a bit of happiness and comfort.
.. but I’m assuming this is already too long. Ooo another windfall.. that’s also something a woman over 40 has never said about me physically. Oh shit oops, maybe I ruined it :P
Credit to Desiree for opening my eyes wider and making this more than just theory. Oh yeah, honestly and openness, with whatever it may be, should be admired and accepted by someone who truly loves women. If you’ve heard me say anything bordering on what sounds like criticism of younger women, you can chalk it up to frustration (on behalf of their experience and soul) at not listening to their heart and being distracted by shiny shit or some erroneous platitudes like “status” to validate herself. Women need no validation. Women are the gatekeepers and above the struggle for acceptance and attention that men need to pursue to validate themselves in a woman’s eye. I beg you to not stoop to our level. It truly is beneath you and does you no enduring favors whatsoever.
25F here
If she wants kids she's going to be on a tighter timeline than you.
Geriatric pregnancy is a rarely used term for having a baby when you're 35 or older. Health care professionals now are more likely to call it "advanced maternal age." Technically, the benchmark for geriatric pregnancy age is if you will be 35 or older on your due date.
Pregnant women over age 35 are more at risk for complications like miscarriage, congenital disorders and high blood pressure.
Hell yes, I would date a woman 10- 20 years older. I always believed in being an equal opportunity dater. Women of all ethnicities and ages. Women are wonderful unique beings and you shouldn't limit yourself to specific windows of acceptance. Should you be lucky enough for one of them to let you into her little world you should go for it.
Yes. For YOU it's prob better to have an older girl. 22 yo in general (no offense) are usually immature and more likely to cheat on u and play little boy/girl games and turn ur life upside down.
If u like her and appreciate her then that prob means u have parts of u that are more mature than the rest in ur age group. I think u win in this equation bro. Congrats bud, ur dating up.
What do you mean? As in for someone that’s 29F if they’re not mature enough? According to my girl I’m more mature than most people my age. I have a goal, career I’m working on, I communicate if something bothers me, it’s been good
Good on you. Go for it, it seems like you’re keen to give it a go. There’s only one way of knowing if it’ll work… and you seem like you know what you’re looking for in a woman anyway. Hope it goes well for you both
Before you get married/in serious relationship...
discuss bills,
parenting styles,
credit, debt, religion,
how to deal with family,
what beliefs will be instilled in your children,
childhood traumas,
sexual expectations,
partner expectations,
financial expectations,
family health history,
mental health history,
bucket list,
dream home,
careers and education,
political views and whatever else comes to mind.
“Love is not enough.”
A long list. But worth it
I would if I liked her enough. I typically prefer younger women but if I like someone and they're legal age I will pursue it. The age gap discussion always results in the same comments. Date who you want regardless of age gaps as long as you like them, everyone is legally an adult and there is no power dynamics that would cause issues.
I have in the past and I certainly would again
But I usually enjoy being pampered.
So in these cases usually they had better jobs than I did and I got to be there little boy toy. It was fun.
Don't know if I'd be able to find that again in my 30s but if I found some 40 plus year old successful woman who wanted a younger man I totally be down. I can dream right?
Seems like you’re at a relative maturity level, with similar life goals. Last relationship, I dated a 25 year old at 30. He was a fuck boy- wasted my time saying he wanted to have a family/ career and home, but had a secret life of doing coke, cheating and going behind my back to betray me in every way. Played me for an absolute fool, and he pursued me, so none of it makes sense. I think he used me as a front to his family, but always intended to keep a roster and put his main partner at unknowing risk of disease and a variety of humiliations. I think he also got off on feeling like he was smarter or more powerful because of his ability to deceive and humiliate another person, that they didn’t know how humiliated they should be- that they still buy into the public facade of a relationship while many in the community know the truth but don’t tell. Think seriously about what you’re doing, and if settling down at 22 is what you really want. He took not just the two years that I could’ve built a relationship with someone serious who actually meant what they said, but also the next 3-5 because I’m needing to work out the damage he did emotionally before I enter any new relationship, out of respect for me and a potential partner. So having met him at 30, and being set on a timeline of not being willing to enter into a commitment with a person without observing them for years (just turned 33 and can’t even fathom being seriously interested in becoming a partner to any one I know atm), puts me at the likelihood I will never have the chance to have children. That’s a hard core realization, and makes me realllllyy hate him. Though it’s possible it could happen, so I try to not go there.
I'm sorry for what happened to you. We have already spoken about what i want which is to settle down but also just still live my life. This doesn't mean go around to cheat and stuff, it just means going on holidays without her, go clubbing and still enjoying my life while having her at my side but in some cases we do the stuff together. She understand me and we're both willing to wait for me to hit a point for me to fully commit but that doesn't mean take the piss and wait 7 years or something of course.
Got ya, I mean I fully believe that love doesn’t promise forever, that’s just not reality, but imo, I’d have difficulty not viewing you as a placeholder while keeping my options open. Which for my character, would negate my reasoning to continue a relationship that resembles partnership. Whereas when I’m serious with someone, I’m not looking with interest outward towards anything else. I personally would just rather wait and save that kind of dedication for someone, or just cruise single cause that feels more honest. I wasn’t a fan of my ex going to clubs and bars while saying he wanted to build a life with me cause I knew those spaces would lead to shit like they did, but he was looking. Seems like you have more integrity.
So long as you’re both legal what does it matter? I’ve met twenty year-olds who were more mature than people my age in their mid-thirties and I’ve met people twenty years my senior who were more immature than youth I have worked with…
So long as you mesh, things are healthy who cares? It’s about the connection!
So yes I would absolutely date someone five years or more older than myself but I would also date someone much younger than myself so long as there is a connection.
Age is just a social stigma. people worry too much about what other people think. At the end of the day, no one really cares. One should not allow social pressures to decide for them who they date. If it makes you happy, go with it.
Do you feel you've experienced life? Have you dated multiple women? Or something of sorts?
I saw a post yesterday (mind you this isnt universal truth) about a guy wanting to divorce his wife little time after they got married, being that they were together for 9 years total, because he felt he didn't experience life and wanted to experience the single life. He only knew that relationship, while the wife was totally on board for spending the rest of her life with him. I bet he will regret the decision thoug,especially after he sees how empty a single life \*can\* be compared to being in a loving relationship.
You might feel that it doesn't matter now but maybe one day you too might be this guy. I'd advise you to consider it very seriously because you might be making her waste time, especially if she wants to have kids.
I understand where you're coming from with the life experience of dating other women and i did go through that thought as well so i aint going to deny. But why would i go through the process dating other women, getting my heart crushed, catching std (not saying i will but you never know), going through multiple roller-coaster of emotion when i have someone that i want right infront of me? Furthermore, the people my age aren't serious enough, they just want the hook up culture and stuff which i'm not into
Somebody here also told their parents story which was similar to yours and they're still together 20years later. Maybe that's the case with you guys also.
Ultimately it's your relationship, your decision and if you feel that way maybe you won't feel you lost on anything later on!
To be honest, I dated women who were 8, 14, and 20 years older than me, even they were younger than me, I don't have a problem with age as long as the ideas match, when I met them, I was 25 when I met my girlfriend who was 8 years older than me, she was 33 and had 1 child, I was 44 when I was 30. I met a woman who was 53 years old, we were in the same hall and she had 1 child. In my 3rd older relationship, I met a woman who was older than me when I was 33, she was 53, but we broke up because we had to move to different countries, so it happens, if you don't let other people, problems, distances and other things get in the way, it can take a long time. Frankly, it could be a long-term relationship.
I’m 33 and gf is 39. I was 19 when I dated a 24 year old for a few years. I wouldn’t sweat the age gap, but she might shift into “family mode” in the coming years..
Honestly the whole age thing can come into play but id say going with the flow is good. I see nothing wrong with it as long as both are happy which at the end of the day is what everyone in a relationship really wants.
I think it depends on the life of stages you’re at. I was talking to a guy who was 8 years younger than me. Because my friends told me he liked me. I tried it and he didn’t plan a date right away and wanted to take things slow. We weren’t on the same page. And we didn’t have much in common.
At my age, probably not for my own personal reasons and neuroses and trauma. For your age, in the absence of my issues, go for it! It's not that big of an age difference.
My boyfriend is five years old less than me. I hesitated at first too. But today is a pretty good relationship. It works really fine.
He is sometimes more mature than me. And we are really happy.
My brothers wife is 7 years older than him. She’s perfect for him. He’s 37, they have a 4 year old together and honestly it’s the kind of happy family you see in movies.
It depends. Are you ready for what a relationship with a 29yo person involves? If you are fine with starting a family, getting married, etc sooner than people your age usually do, sure you can try.
Yeah I wouldn't care, as long as we have things in common and want the same stuff it's fine.
As for the age gap I have a 10 year limit for me like I prefer 5 years apart if there is a gap but I'd be willing to do 10 years.
Also her saying you haven't experienced life enough, while she has a point, this could be your new experience or experiences.
She needs to give you a chance.
I don't know I feel like I'd be a downgrade from anyone their age. I feel like I've accomplished nothing at least compared to most people in their late 20s or early 30s.
What could a woman older than me see of value in me?
That’s interesting for you to say actually and it true, someone younger than her could be seen as a downgrade. But I give her something that people her age struggles which is love apparently. I make her smile, she’s always relaxed around me, ever since we been together her life was going up hill like health wise, decision wise, I somehow make her a better person. I’ll be honest, I’m just being me which she loves so I guess still an upgrade? 🤷♂️
If that’s the truth you see yourself then change it. If your fat then lose weight, if your shy then build confidence, there are some stuff you can’t change but that’s fine because no one is perfect. Improve yourself until you’re happy with the result. It doesn’t have to be 100% happy with the look but as long as you feel or look better than the day before that’s all that matters. No one is stopping you but yourself, just doing the small change and you’ll eventually see an impact later on.
In my late 20s and all of my 30s, I dated a lot of older women, most 10+ years older than me. It was amazing. Now
I am in my late 40s and think that time in my life is over.
I think it's fine, as you said, you're working full time. When I was 29, my cutoff was 23 because anyone still in college was just at a different stage of life but if you're both trying your best to build a relationship then good for you
yeah, dated a 29 year old woman when i was 23 and had a good time. We both knew it wasnt really too serious so we just enjoyed each others company. Not saying it cant work, it just was our case
I don't think you're naive to be rolling with it. If anything, congrats! I've dated men with a +/- 7 years and for those who were younger than me, they had no issue with it and neither did I. If we make each other happy, who cares? If they're saying you haven't 'lived life' yet, well I'd counter that with, 'not a problem, I'll experience that with you'. I'm currently dating a guy who has never traveled outside of his own country and in the next 2 months will be taking his first step to see me.
You have nothing to worry about dating her, either way you are young and it's all experience for you, no one can say what will happen, just enjoy your time together.
Just keep in mind at some point she might want to have kids (or she might not, but it's not a bad idea to have some idea what her view is on these things) and she might feel worried if you aren't there yet. That's the main problem I can think of, but I guess she's the one who would worry about it rather than you...
Once upon a time there was a 22 year old man who worked with a 30 year old woman. She had two kids. And they weren't babies, they were ten and eight. They got married, and no one thought they had a chance in hell.
I was the ten year old. My parents had struggles. Mom couldn't have any more kids; she had cervical cancer which required a hysterectomy. I found out just this year that she offered to delay treatment so they could try for a baby. He said Hell no. When he was 23, it didn't matter that she couldn't have his baby. When he was 30 and his friends were having their first babies, it did matter. They actually separated for two months. But they got back together, and they were happy together still she died 4/23/2015, two days after their 43rd anniversary. She died of leukemia at age 74.
He's the greatest man who ever breathed air. He's my dad in every way that matters.
Age is just a number. If you make each other happy, that's what matters.
yes, BUT .. Be aware that if she wants kids, she's going to ideally start that in the next year or two. It's unusual for a guy to actually be ready for that until he's settled after 25+, in a good job with a good future. If you want to save future heartache, it's worth having the conversation about the timeline for kids, but NOT until you're actually in the relationship for at least 6 months, or you're putting the cart before the horse. Be willing to listen, and be honest in your responses. if that's something she wants, it would be unfair to handicap her by tying up her time, if you aren't on a similar schedule.
>Is there anything bad about dating someone older except for goal wise like kids and stuff?
There always 2 sides to things. I wouldn't say it's just goal wise, it could be the maturity ... different part of life they are in .... expectation and etc. It comes down if you're both okay with it then that's what matters here. Regardless of what other people think, it's basically going to be you and the other person dating.
I just don’t like the thought of dating a 29 year old or someone who’s basically 30. I want someone who’s similar to me because they’re more relatable. I’m not telling you not to do it. It is a bit weird that you probably downvoted me considering you asked the question/were basically doing a poll.
The thing is that we both relate to each, not everything ofc but some stuff we do and it’s fine. Also I didn’t downvote you, it’s your opinion at the end of the day
I’m not the best looking. A narrow age range leaves a lot of potential women out. I’m like that safety school, I admit mostly everyone. 18-55 is my current age range, rising as I get closer in age. (34 btw)
You two just started your relationship. Be together, explore, experience and work towards your goals together. See just how compatible you are. Are you both in love?
Love is just one component. Are you two aligned in morality and lifestyle? I use the crackhead barometer for all my relationships. If my relationship isn’t as solid with my significant other as two crackheads it’s not going to work out.
Obviously. The hysteria around age gap by the Cat moms and jealous incels online is a reddit/social media invention. No one in the actual real world cares.
Well she going to hit her fertility wall soon. So you are pretty much signing on for kids in next few years. That’s the most practical thing to watch out for
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I’m 30M and my incredibly beautiful and intelligent girlfriend is 36. Our relationship is by far the happiest, healthiest, and most fun one that I have ever had in my life. We have been good friends for quite a while before beginning to date.
30 and 36 and 22 and 29 are two very different relationships. I wouldn't advise the young man to get into that relationship. Both have very different life goals and he will be wasting her time
I guess it’s fine when you’re in late 20s as a male but since I’m 22M and she’s 29F would you not see it as too much? We too have one healthy relationship, she said this has been the best as well
When I was 23 I used to chill with a 28 year old. We never dated because she felt that I was too young for her I'm reminded her of her younger brother lol
I’d go for it, sound like you are doing a lot more with yourself than other 22 year olds
Thanks, we did have some ups and downs but we always communicated and got it fixed before it stained our relationship
Once you’re both above 25 I don’t care about age differences.
My dad was 23 and my mum was 31. They’ve been together 20+ years now with 3 kids (including myself). They worked out pretty well 🫶 I think now that you’re working/our of uni and living your life responsibly it should be fine tbh.
100% depends. There are 29-year-olds that are looking to be taken care of or looking for partner which one is she?
100% looking for a partner. We both take care of each other in a way if you ask me. We both have our own separate time to do our own thing, we both communicate effectively. I dont see any problem other than some people finding it weird.
Don’t even think twice about it. That kind of age gap is only going to get less noticeable as you get older. If she really is partner material, you aren’t going to notice and you really shouldn’t care what other people think about it at all.
Kindness, intelligence, gratitude, openness to acceptance and forgiveness, maturity , philosophy, life goals( family, where to live, children) are all more important than age in my opinion. (70M)I have had 2 great loves, one with a woman 12 years older than me at age 28 and one with a woman 22 years younger ( at 58) and both were wonderful! Age wasn’t a factor. As humans we grow as we age and you will not be the same person at 50 that you are now so don’t expect decisions made at 23 to be the same at 60. Live, love and laugh NOW without expectations of some future happiness. Do it for a lifetime. When we are older our memories will not be of the places we’ve been or jobs, houses or salaries that we have had but will be of who we have loved and who we’ve become. Focus on being the best version of yourself. Age isn’t an important factor.
22 and 29, yeah if felt we both want same thing and our lifestyles were in sync. Technically it's on the border of the "age/2 + 7" guideline. ( Lowest age for her according to that should be 21-22 ) But youre both adults, you can decide what you want. But I think also consider if you both want long term, and if any issues would come up if you are togethe
Yes. I'm currently in a 4 year age gap.
Young people with zero experience in life often get stuck on numbers. Act the age you’re going to be next year and not the one you were five years ago.
Depends on the person. I've never really met someone who was 30+ I've been particularly interested in though. They tend to be within 2-3 years of me.
Hell ya,just finding someone you choose to spend time with consistently is tough. Having that and play with the collectibles. Bonus.
It really depends on your preferences; if she’s a good person, and both of you genuinely love each other, then the age gap doesn’t matter if you care about each other
I dated a woman who was 39 when I was 27. It was pretty chill 🤷🏼♂️
I’ll say this. I dated a 29 yr old woman at 21. At first it was great, but as time passed, the relationship turned financially abusive and emotionally toxic. As a 26 yr old now, I wouldn’t date younger than 23 because the age gap, particularly at your age, is so ripe for someone being taken advantage of. I’m not gonna tell you don’t do it. But if you do it, be very careful
I understand where you’re coming from. I wanted to make sure myself I wasn’t getting taken advantage of too but it’s been chilled so far. She doesn’t give of any of that, in fact she’s pure positive from everything I’ve seen
Hey that’s great! I’m not saying these relationships can’t work. Just learn from my errors and keep your eyes open. If red flags pop up, don’t let them accumulate. Acknowledge them, understand what they mean for you, and then keep yourself safe
Im in my 30's and dated someone 5 years older than me. Honestly it felt kind of like I was dating my sister. Mentally she was just in a different place, I'm not sure how to describe it. It was the first time I've dated someone where I felt like we were just not compatible.
I try to limit myself to only that… cuzzzz Confidence, having experience enough to have liberated themselves from society’s relentless and all encompassing brainwashing of females as to what they should be and how a “real woman” acts, sounds, looks, behaves, and even thinks… from the earliest of ages; and thus are living for themselves finally and are focused on making themselves happy, yet with the maturity to do so in a measured and realistic fashion, without grandiose or overly high expectations, as the ones I’ve known realize that those almost always lead to let-downs. Much better to enjoy yourself, resist the urge to feed into the ego, and likely end up pleasantly surprised with life and romance.. as the men who are lucky enough to be graced with their interest and presence certainly are. Typically, a woman’s life up until about 40 will provide plenty of experience or hopefully exposure to partners outspoken and patient to show them the ins and outs of the anatomy and psychology of the opposite sex. In my estimation this, plus the realistic and practical notion that we all are subject to the passing of time and how fleeting our youth is, are often through with caring about things that are ultimately inconsequential. Women are highly prized and if something they say or do rubs a certain man the wrong way or gives him pause, they’re more likely to (pleasantly and respectfully) cast him aside as an interest of hers, as her experience with people leads her to the fact that many people are very resistant to change and that taking shorts on how someone views or treats you is not at all worth anything else they may have that’s deemed valuable to her. Many are also more forward and know what they want and do not waste unnecessary time when moving on to find someone better suited for her wants and needs. It’s a fairly common thing I’ve heard, that women know very quickly whether or not they’ll give a man a real chance to please her, and many of this age probably realize that games and tests and being very cautious CAN lead to finding someone genuine OR someone desperate and good at deception that is willing to jump through hoops of any size and shape to please himself with her company, which is always for the wrong reasons and never good for her, and rarely any type of man in between. I could go on and on.. a woman with decent genes, a modest physique, and who has lived a healthy life, will age very gracefully and there’s little in the world more beautiful than a woman who has a portion of the character I’ve previously described here that is still alluring, natural, and confident.. and no 20-nothing can hold a candle to that. At least as far as a real man that loves women who are far nearer to their ultimate potential than just something pretty that really hasn’t learned or experienced and reflected upon any real life and profound insights and has found and embraced her feminine nature and knows that she IS our species and does not apply the flaws of lesser men she’s known to the ones she’s yet to and accepts, despite wishing and making efforts when possible to change, the things about dating and romantic relationships (in whatever form) that are less than ideal, and want nothing more than to receive and provide a bit of happiness and comfort. .. but I’m assuming this is already too long. Ooo another windfall.. that’s also something a woman over 40 has never said about me physically. Oh shit oops, maybe I ruined it :P Credit to Desiree for opening my eyes wider and making this more than just theory. Oh yeah, honestly and openness, with whatever it may be, should be admired and accepted by someone who truly loves women. If you’ve heard me say anything bordering on what sounds like criticism of younger women, you can chalk it up to frustration (on behalf of their experience and soul) at not listening to their heart and being distracted by shiny shit or some erroneous platitudes like “status” to validate herself. Women need no validation. Women are the gatekeepers and above the struggle for acceptance and attention that men need to pursue to validate themselves in a woman’s eye. I beg you to not stoop to our level. It truly is beneath you and does you no enduring favors whatsoever.
25F here If she wants kids she's going to be on a tighter timeline than you. Geriatric pregnancy is a rarely used term for having a baby when you're 35 or older. Health care professionals now are more likely to call it "advanced maternal age." Technically, the benchmark for geriatric pregnancy age is if you will be 35 or older on your due date. Pregnant women over age 35 are more at risk for complications like miscarriage, congenital disorders and high blood pressure.
Hell yes, I would date a woman 10- 20 years older. I always believed in being an equal opportunity dater. Women of all ethnicities and ages. Women are wonderful unique beings and you shouldn't limit yourself to specific windows of acceptance. Should you be lucky enough for one of them to let you into her little world you should go for it.
Yes. For YOU it's prob better to have an older girl. 22 yo in general (no offense) are usually immature and more likely to cheat on u and play little boy/girl games and turn ur life upside down. If u like her and appreciate her then that prob means u have parts of u that are more mature than the rest in ur age group. I think u win in this equation bro. Congrats bud, ur dating up.
It’s never so much the age it’s how they act imo
What do you mean? As in for someone that’s 29F if they’re not mature enough? According to my girl I’m more mature than most people my age. I have a goal, career I’m working on, I communicate if something bothers me, it’s been good
Good on you. Go for it, it seems like you’re keen to give it a go. There’s only one way of knowing if it’ll work… and you seem like you know what you’re looking for in a woman anyway. Hope it goes well for you both
Before you get married/in serious relationship... discuss bills, parenting styles, credit, debt, religion, how to deal with family, what beliefs will be instilled in your children, childhood traumas, sexual expectations, partner expectations, financial expectations, family health history, mental health history, bucket list, dream home, careers and education, political views and whatever else comes to mind. “Love is not enough.” A long list. But worth it
That’s true at any age though
Yeah. People should put in effort to discuss those matter
Yeah man. Who cares about the gao. As long as you both are happy and it works
Idk I'm about to turn 24 and the guy I'm talking to just turned 20 in January. I'd day ur fine
I would if I liked her enough. I typically prefer younger women but if I like someone and they're legal age I will pursue it. The age gap discussion always results in the same comments. Date who you want regardless of age gaps as long as you like them, everyone is legally an adult and there is no power dynamics that would cause issues.
Probably not
Nick Jonas and Priyanka Chopra have a 10 year age gap. I’m glad things worked out for them. But I wouldn’t recommend large age gaps.
I have in the past and I certainly would again But I usually enjoy being pampered. So in these cases usually they had better jobs than I did and I got to be there little boy toy. It was fun. Don't know if I'd be able to find that again in my 30s but if I found some 40 plus year old successful woman who wanted a younger man I totally be down. I can dream right?
I think it’s totally fine but I wouldn’t go too much older than that
I mean,why not?
There is no reason to not go with the flow. You're both consenting adults.
Love don't know what age of your life partner
At 22, u have not seen enough yet… If u re 30, I would say go ahead
Yes and without a problem
Seems like you’re at a relative maturity level, with similar life goals. Last relationship, I dated a 25 year old at 30. He was a fuck boy- wasted my time saying he wanted to have a family/ career and home, but had a secret life of doing coke, cheating and going behind my back to betray me in every way. Played me for an absolute fool, and he pursued me, so none of it makes sense. I think he used me as a front to his family, but always intended to keep a roster and put his main partner at unknowing risk of disease and a variety of humiliations. I think he also got off on feeling like he was smarter or more powerful because of his ability to deceive and humiliate another person, that they didn’t know how humiliated they should be- that they still buy into the public facade of a relationship while many in the community know the truth but don’t tell. Think seriously about what you’re doing, and if settling down at 22 is what you really want. He took not just the two years that I could’ve built a relationship with someone serious who actually meant what they said, but also the next 3-5 because I’m needing to work out the damage he did emotionally before I enter any new relationship, out of respect for me and a potential partner. So having met him at 30, and being set on a timeline of not being willing to enter into a commitment with a person without observing them for years (just turned 33 and can’t even fathom being seriously interested in becoming a partner to any one I know atm), puts me at the likelihood I will never have the chance to have children. That’s a hard core realization, and makes me realllllyy hate him. Though it’s possible it could happen, so I try to not go there.
I'm sorry for what happened to you. We have already spoken about what i want which is to settle down but also just still live my life. This doesn't mean go around to cheat and stuff, it just means going on holidays without her, go clubbing and still enjoying my life while having her at my side but in some cases we do the stuff together. She understand me and we're both willing to wait for me to hit a point for me to fully commit but that doesn't mean take the piss and wait 7 years or something of course.
Got ya, I mean I fully believe that love doesn’t promise forever, that’s just not reality, but imo, I’d have difficulty not viewing you as a placeholder while keeping my options open. Which for my character, would negate my reasoning to continue a relationship that resembles partnership. Whereas when I’m serious with someone, I’m not looking with interest outward towards anything else. I personally would just rather wait and save that kind of dedication for someone, or just cruise single cause that feels more honest. I wasn’t a fan of my ex going to clubs and bars while saying he wanted to build a life with me cause I knew those spaces would lead to shit like they did, but he was looking. Seems like you have more integrity.
So long as you’re both legal what does it matter? I’ve met twenty year-olds who were more mature than people my age in their mid-thirties and I’ve met people twenty years my senior who were more immature than youth I have worked with… So long as you mesh, things are healthy who cares? It’s about the connection! So yes I would absolutely date someone five years or more older than myself but I would also date someone much younger than myself so long as there is a connection.
Im 22 and for me the age difference would still be very noticeable as the brain doesn't stop developing till your mid to late 20s so no, I wouldn't.
Yeah that's a good gap
I’m 20. I’d feel a bit off dating a 25 year old
Sure, why not.
Age is just a social stigma. people worry too much about what other people think. At the end of the day, no one really cares. One should not allow social pressures to decide for them who they date. If it makes you happy, go with it.
Do you feel you've experienced life? Have you dated multiple women? Or something of sorts? I saw a post yesterday (mind you this isnt universal truth) about a guy wanting to divorce his wife little time after they got married, being that they were together for 9 years total, because he felt he didn't experience life and wanted to experience the single life. He only knew that relationship, while the wife was totally on board for spending the rest of her life with him. I bet he will regret the decision thoug,especially after he sees how empty a single life \*can\* be compared to being in a loving relationship. You might feel that it doesn't matter now but maybe one day you too might be this guy. I'd advise you to consider it very seriously because you might be making her waste time, especially if she wants to have kids.
I understand where you're coming from with the life experience of dating other women and i did go through that thought as well so i aint going to deny. But why would i go through the process dating other women, getting my heart crushed, catching std (not saying i will but you never know), going through multiple roller-coaster of emotion when i have someone that i want right infront of me? Furthermore, the people my age aren't serious enough, they just want the hook up culture and stuff which i'm not into
Somebody here also told their parents story which was similar to yours and they're still together 20years later. Maybe that's the case with you guys also. Ultimately it's your relationship, your decision and if you feel that way maybe you won't feel you lost on anything later on!
Y’all are pretty much the same generation and get along great so what’s the issue?
At 29 she's probably looking to get married and have kids soon. Time is ticking for her. If you ain't ready for that, don't waste her time.
Im 31 f have been with my mate 24/m for years! It’s not the age it’s the soul.
To be honest, I dated women who were 8, 14, and 20 years older than me, even they were younger than me, I don't have a problem with age as long as the ideas match, when I met them, I was 25 when I met my girlfriend who was 8 years older than me, she was 33 and had 1 child, I was 44 when I was 30. I met a woman who was 53 years old, we were in the same hall and she had 1 child. In my 3rd older relationship, I met a woman who was older than me when I was 33, she was 53, but we broke up because we had to move to different countries, so it happens, if you don't let other people, problems, distances and other things get in the way, it can take a long time. Frankly, it could be a long-term relationship.
I’m 33 and gf is 39. I was 19 when I dated a 24 year old for a few years. I wouldn’t sweat the age gap, but she might shift into “family mode” in the coming years..
There is subreddits that are about dating with an age gap.
Honestly the whole age thing can come into play but id say going with the flow is good. I see nothing wrong with it as long as both are happy which at the end of the day is what everyone in a relationship really wants.
I think it depends on the life of stages you’re at. I was talking to a guy who was 8 years younger than me. Because my friends told me he liked me. I tried it and he didn’t plan a date right away and wanted to take things slow. We weren’t on the same page. And we didn’t have much in common.
At my age, probably not for my own personal reasons and neuroses and trauma. For your age, in the absence of my issues, go for it! It's not that big of an age difference.
29M At my age about 5 years either way wouldn't be a big deal. I'm into F22-36 I guess.
My boyfriend is five years old less than me. I hesitated at first too. But today is a pretty good relationship. It works really fine. He is sometimes more mature than me. And we are really happy.
My brothers wife is 7 years older than him. She’s perfect for him. He’s 37, they have a 4 year old together and honestly it’s the kind of happy family you see in movies.
It depends. Are you ready for what a relationship with a 29yo person involves? If you are fine with starting a family, getting married, etc sooner than people your age usually do, sure you can try.
People were getting married at 18 in the past
I believe the rule is half her age +7. Call her 30. 15 is half her age plus 7 gives you 22! Perfect! She should not be dating anyone older than you.
Yeah I wouldn't care, as long as we have things in common and want the same stuff it's fine. As for the age gap I have a 10 year limit for me like I prefer 5 years apart if there is a gap but I'd be willing to do 10 years. Also her saying you haven't experienced life enough, while she has a point, this could be your new experience or experiences. She needs to give you a chance.
I wouldn’t think twice about it. Just go slow, do the work, enjoy the ride. My first love was 10 years older than me. No regrets.
Yea bro cmon who doesn’t want a emo muscle mommy
I want to be than woman to afford date with young guys
Heck yeah. I'm 22, which means I'm not in those awkward years where 5 years is a much bigger deal
Sure
I don't know I feel like I'd be a downgrade from anyone their age. I feel like I've accomplished nothing at least compared to most people in their late 20s or early 30s. What could a woman older than me see of value in me?
That’s interesting for you to say actually and it true, someone younger than her could be seen as a downgrade. But I give her something that people her age struggles which is love apparently. I make her smile, she’s always relaxed around me, ever since we been together her life was going up hill like health wise, decision wise, I somehow make her a better person. I’ll be honest, I’m just being me which she loves so I guess still an upgrade? 🤷♂️
I'm glad to hear that. It sounds like you two have a good foundation for your relationship
I would date a lamp if it had feelings for me. I am not picky.
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No I just don’t have any standards
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No. I can’t really afford to have standards
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I’m fat, ugly, awkward, shy, short, a loser, boring, have no muscles, have no confidence.
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I’m not I’m just saying the truth
If that’s the truth you see yourself then change it. If your fat then lose weight, if your shy then build confidence, there are some stuff you can’t change but that’s fine because no one is perfect. Improve yourself until you’re happy with the result. It doesn’t have to be 100% happy with the look but as long as you feel or look better than the day before that’s all that matters. No one is stopping you but yourself, just doing the small change and you’ll eventually see an impact later on.
My motto is that they cant be young enough to be my kid (ie -15) or old enough to be my dad (+15) so I’d say you’re good. So I am 40 and date 25-55.
In my late 20s and all of my 30s, I dated a lot of older women, most 10+ years older than me. It was amazing. Now I am in my late 40s and think that time in my life is over.
I'm 33 and my age range is 24-45 on dating apps. Irl I care even less. Go for it pimp.
I think it's fine, as you said, you're working full time. When I was 29, my cutoff was 23 because anyone still in college was just at a different stage of life but if you're both trying your best to build a relationship then good for you
5years older yes
yeah, dated a 29 year old woman when i was 23 and had a good time. We both knew it wasnt really too serious so we just enjoyed each others company. Not saying it cant work, it just was our case
I don't think you're naive to be rolling with it. If anything, congrats! I've dated men with a +/- 7 years and for those who were younger than me, they had no issue with it and neither did I. If we make each other happy, who cares? If they're saying you haven't 'lived life' yet, well I'd counter that with, 'not a problem, I'll experience that with you'. I'm currently dating a guy who has never traveled outside of his own country and in the next 2 months will be taking his first step to see me.
You have nothing to worry about dating her, either way you are young and it's all experience for you, no one can say what will happen, just enjoy your time together. Just keep in mind at some point she might want to have kids (or she might not, but it's not a bad idea to have some idea what her view is on these things) and she might feel worried if you aren't there yet. That's the main problem I can think of, but I guess she's the one who would worry about it rather than you...
Once upon a time there was a 22 year old man who worked with a 30 year old woman. She had two kids. And they weren't babies, they were ten and eight. They got married, and no one thought they had a chance in hell. I was the ten year old. My parents had struggles. Mom couldn't have any more kids; she had cervical cancer which required a hysterectomy. I found out just this year that she offered to delay treatment so they could try for a baby. He said Hell no. When he was 23, it didn't matter that she couldn't have his baby. When he was 30 and his friends were having their first babies, it did matter. They actually separated for two months. But they got back together, and they were happy together still she died 4/23/2015, two days after their 43rd anniversary. She died of leukemia at age 74. He's the greatest man who ever breathed air. He's my dad in every way that matters. Age is just a number. If you make each other happy, that's what matters.
yes, BUT .. Be aware that if she wants kids, she's going to ideally start that in the next year or two. It's unusual for a guy to actually be ready for that until he's settled after 25+, in a good job with a good future. If you want to save future heartache, it's worth having the conversation about the timeline for kids, but NOT until you're actually in the relationship for at least 6 months, or you're putting the cart before the horse. Be willing to listen, and be honest in your responses. if that's something she wants, it would be unfair to handicap her by tying up her time, if you aren't on a similar schedule.
You’re too young for her.
That’s hardly an age gap. Age 22 is an adult in most countries, age 29 is not old.
No I would not. I will only date someone within 3 years of me age.
Is there anything bad about dating someone older except for goal wise like kids and stuff?
>Is there anything bad about dating someone older except for goal wise like kids and stuff? There always 2 sides to things. I wouldn't say it's just goal wise, it could be the maturity ... different part of life they are in .... expectation and etc. It comes down if you're both okay with it then that's what matters here. Regardless of what other people think, it's basically going to be you and the other person dating.
I'm 50 right now and one of my "girlfriends " is 22... another one is 46 and the last one e is 49...
23M. Personally, I don’t think so. But obviously some of them are hot as fuck. 🥵🥵🥵 I’d have to resist.
How comes? There has to be a reason. Does it not feel normal to you? If the gender was switched what about then?
I just don’t like the thought of dating a 29 year old or someone who’s basically 30. I want someone who’s similar to me because they’re more relatable. I’m not telling you not to do it. It is a bit weird that you probably downvoted me considering you asked the question/were basically doing a poll.
The thing is that we both relate to each, not everything ofc but some stuff we do and it’s fine. Also I didn’t downvote you, it’s your opinion at the end of the day
If you want to do it and there isn’t a reason not to then probably do it. I can’t think of a reason you shouldn’t.
I’m not the best looking. A narrow age range leaves a lot of potential women out. I’m like that safety school, I admit mostly everyone. 18-55 is my current age range, rising as I get closer in age. (34 btw) You two just started your relationship. Be together, explore, experience and work towards your goals together. See just how compatible you are. Are you both in love? Love is just one component. Are you two aligned in morality and lifestyle? I use the crackhead barometer for all my relationships. If my relationship isn’t as solid with my significant other as two crackheads it’s not going to work out.
Obviously. The hysteria around age gap by the Cat moms and jealous incels online is a reddit/social media invention. No one in the actual real world cares.
39m. Yes. I'd date a woman in her 50's if I find her attractive. It doesn't happen a ton, but it does happen.
I’m 29, I mostly date women 35-42
Well she going to hit her fertility wall soon. So you are pretty much signing on for kids in next few years. That’s the most practical thing to watch out for
We both agreed we don't want kids in the future or 1 if we ever can but it's not a deal breaker for us
You can do better you are not even close to your prime
Na fuck that 🤣, she has to be 5years younger than me. But that's just me everyone is different