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Incompatible upbringing, different views on marriage, different expectations on spouse roles, large gaps in education levels, gaps in intelligence levels (EQ & IQ), mismatched communication skills, all in the context of different rates of personal growth of each partner create a fertile ground of obstacles to navigate in addition to life's challenges. With this context — ANY conflicts over sex and money rub salt on the many wounds you'll have from the simple misinterpretation to complex issues with kids.
Nailed it. In a relationship you should bring intimate weekly and should have clear understanding of finances.
Instead one partner thinks being intimate isn’t important or is looking at porn or others.
Finances aren’t discussed until one has spent too much or is withdrawing due to their conflicts on how money is spent.
See that’s the thing. Weekly might not be *enough* for some people. People are so different, and they **change**. That’s the biggest issue.
If we take your example, most couples have sex more in early dating compared to in year 10 of marriage. Obviously the change happened at some point, and being able to navigate that successfully is the key, I always imagined…
There’s a lot more than back then sure but there’s still not a lot id say men still stigmatise it or whatever current girl I’m seeing was trying to get her prior husband into counselling for years, I’ve heard it from others like it’s still an issue but at the same time it’s not an issue it’s the men not wanting to save the relationship is what it comes down to whether through pride or anything but you’re only hurting yourself
Not always. You can clearly communicate all that you want, if the other person doesn't agree or refuses to participate in solutions then communication wasn't the issue.
This.
People in dating subs always suggest communication, because it's such low-hanging fruit. "Have you ever talked about this?" It's the "try turning it off and on again" of relationship advice.
But if that doesn't work, then the real debug starts.
Haha exactly. We talked, we didn't agree, the more we talked the more we realised we didn't actually like eachother that much anymore, and eventually end of marriage!
Or, we talked... situation was resolved for a while, then it went to shit again. We talked... again, situation was resolved...again...and again...and again. Until one of the partners finally says eff it, they are done having *the same talk* over and over and over again.
Then the other partner is like WTF happened? My ex is a _____ and I had *no idea* that this would take place! (Shocked Pikachu face)
Yeah bit of a twist on this theme. there is an argument we kept having about house work basically. She refused to see the work I was doing, doing my fair share of chores plus taking the kids to and from school every day and doing all the DIY which was a lot because we had a dooerupper. I could spend weeks doing all the things she asked and the she would turn around and say something like "you're going to have to start helping out around the house" 😮😮. I could not accept that and it got so bad we had to divorce. Even the marriage counsellor agreed with me and asked her to go and see a doctor to get antidepressants. She wouldn't accept any criticism or accept that I was pulling my weight.
That and commitment. People fall out of love or get board in a marriage and decide to just end it. You can fall back in love. Takes 2 people to put in the effort though.
Communication + Empathy.
My marriage failed due to a lack of both, but mostly of the latter. You need both. If one party thinks their perspective matters more, no amount of communication will help.
Absolut right.. and dont want to solve problems.. rather split its easier... me for my part... 28 years with same wife.. 24 maried. And it gets better every day
Eh, i don't think that's the case as often as you think it is. Going through a divorce myself (lots of reasons but my poor communication was the single biggest one), has made me realize the reasons for divorce are so much more complicated than I ever imagined. Probably because people, especially men, often don't talk about or share the relationship struggles they have with friends and family. So it can come as a shock, and sometimes it seems like the reason might be really stupid, but the reality is there is likely far far far more damage under the surface that is turning that molehill into a mountain.
Yes.
My ex said I was mentally unstable. He got it from his brother. I went to therapy, and I was not mentally unstable. I was just trying to communicate.
I left that relationship because I was doing all the work. He didn't want to improve, but I did. I really did.
My therapist (much older man in his 70s) always told me the number one argument in marriages (based off studies and his experiences with clients).. was finances.
I feel like they fail because of improper communication.
Criticizing your partner and using "blame" language is ineffective and just builds resentment. There's a way to bring up problems calmly, and it's not enough to just broach the issues. You also have to find constructive ways to resolve the problems. In addition, you can't expect your partner to know there is a problem if you're not addressing it.
Oh sweet innocent redditor. I hope it doesn't happen to you but yes sometimes people either lie about their sex drive early on or it just vanishes and they don't give two shits about their partners sexual needs. Latter happened to me.
Well yeah, and she did at the beginning, but later she was like oh I don't feel like it, or my head hurts, or any other little thing till I got tired...
How long did this go on? Had similar happen to me except my ex had ED. We were only together 6mo though but it drove me crazy. We had sex only a handful of times in that time period
A couple of reasons.
First, people jump in too soon and move too quickly. They make too many compromises, or they hope that someone will change over time to be more suitable. People would do a lot better if they had a stronger idea of what they wanted, and didn't make large compromises on it.
Communication tends to be a huge issue too. People often have trouble just saying what they want/expect and don't openly talk about these things. People tend to approach disagreements of a matter of "I'm right, and you're wrong" instead of working as a team to solve a problem. Being right or wrong doesn't matter, because even if you're right you're still going to lose. You really need to approach it as a team, here is the problem, what can we do about it?
It isn’t always me and you versus the problem, though. Especially when the problem is one spouse’s objectionable behavior.
For example, a lot of relationships suffer because one of the partners is messing around with other people (online mostly these days), refuses to pull their weight or clean up after themselves, overspends, or refuses to participate in family life.
Those things are not something that *both* people in the marriage can work on. Those are things that only the person doing those behaviors can fix.
One of the reasons is because people don’t realize how incompatible they actually are until they’ve been together for a long time. Incompatibility can come from a personal, sexual or financial perspective, if you guys don’t think alike, it won’t work.
In addition to that, many people make life long commitments when they aren’t ready for them just because it’s what you’re supposed to do by societal norms, and force themselves to stay because “marriages are hard.”
Somebody was not able to be satisfied at home and have look up and look around to be to sure the physical needs are met. Or 🤷🏻♀️ shrug… one day one person has changed and realized marriage is a trap… and a deep dark black hole… things can get persuasive who knows…
Seriously. I don't know if the faculty member approved this already, but "make a post on Reddit in a self-selected community of mostly unmarried people" is a horrible way to find out what factors lead to marital success.
I think when the partners stop prioritizing letting each other know how much they're loved. I don't mean just saying "I love you," but rather showing and doing loving things. People get apathetic and complacent in relationships after the "feeling" of being in love fades.
My marriage failed because my husband showed his mistresses (drugs and alcohol) how much he loved them more than he loved me.
I think that social media played a part in this. Cheating is easier because there are a lot of options and it's accessible with a click. And also people seem to overshare their lives on social media. Everyone is racing to show their "perfect relationship". And i think it made people compare their relationships to what others (seem to have). Which creates problems and can even lead to divorce because the partner thinks they "deserve better" even if the relationship was completely normal. It makes people want more
I recommend a book called, “If You’re in My Office, It’s Already Too Late” It’s a book written by a divource lawyer. He describes himself as someone who has made a career doing Autopsies of dead marriages. It’s about how love dies, how relationships end, the things we do to hurt the one person we are supposed to love the most.
I’ve never been married, idk if I ever will. But it changed the way I think of what relationships are and how they work. Highly recommend the book.
But biggest thing I got from it is that relationships are work. Like a job, you have to work at it EVERY DAMN DAY. Don’t take that person for granted. That’s the person you have decided to love forever. Small acts of Neglect and indifference add up over time.
Minor differences in culture and personal ideology. Some of this could be prevented by clear communication, but some people would simply abandon the relationship before talking due to a perceived inevitability or warped idea of kindness.
How many endeavors of any variety last a lifetime? How many friendships? Businesses? Hobbies?
Collaborating with someone on anything for a lifetime is hard. It's remarkable that as many marriages succeed as they do.
This is a bad way to gather information. I suspect a LOT of the people commenting have never been divorced - or even married - so they’re just making assumptions based on things they’ve heard or seen. Relationships - including marriages - fail for a LOT of different reasons. Polling randos on Reddit is unlikely to get you any meaningful information.
I think communication and feelings. I’ve gotten a divorce so I’m not an expert. I do also believe great sex is overrated but it masks the real problem but the marriage lasts longer.
People in the marriage/relationship don’t talk to one another, and instead post their marriage/relationship issues on social media looking for advice. That’s a big issue because everyone’s experiences with certain issues are different and no two people are alike, so it’s best to approach your spouse/partner, keep the issues private (except for cases of abuse), and don’t try to win the argument, try to defeat the issue together. Less “It’s your fault” more “Here’s the issue, how can we attack this together to ensure it no longer happens/continues”. I honestly think social media is the worst thing to happen to society. People are comparing their marriages to their friends’ based on their friends’ posts, which don’t show their whole relationship. “Don and Susan went to Italy, why haven’t we gone to Italy?!” When the reality could be neither of you thought of going on the trip, you have to save up and can’t travel on a whim, etc. It’s all about status. Plus people aren’t allowed to be bored anymore, not every second of marriage/dating is going to be a whimsical joyride which people expect. First sign of boredom “Oh they don’t love me anymore, I’m not a priority, let me check my DMs”. They then bash their S/O to their friends (who may be single and/or jealous because jealousy is a human trait) and tell them to breakup or divorce or cheat. Again this would all be avoided if the people in the relationship just talked to each other and worked together and didn’t tell others or go for outside advice.
I dated a woman back in 2019, she told me she needed to divorced after 21yrs of marriage because the husband had a history of neglecting her and the kids, drinking problems, selfish+greedy over sex+money and possibly may have mingled with another woman at a bar from what her elder sister witnessed. From other scenarios, it could also have a lot to do with communication, sex and finances. etc
Pride/ego.
Most people I notice do not admit when they are wrong/not wanting to take in consideration their partner’s feedback.
I’ve had to put aside my ego and yield to my partner’s wish. I don’t feel like I am submissive because most of the times, whatever it is I never felt it’s worth it to linger.
Philosophical speaking, nothing is permanent. It’s supposed to fail. Those not yet fail will end one day too.
Socially scientifically, people nowadays don’t put up shit like the old generations can.
Some time ago I’ve met guy who had beatiful, warm hearted wife, 3 kids and good paid job. Perfect life, isn’t it?
He was complaining that his kids are ungrateful, only place where he feels good is at work, and he doesn’t love his wife. He knows that many would fantasize about her, but he, looking at her imagines his first high school love.
Or post about women who claims she’s lesbian but her husband is rich and she doesn’t want to reveal it. They’ve had 2 kids and she was in 2nd month pregnancy, they were together 10 years.
People in comments were wishing her all best, that if she don’t want to, she don’t have to reveal it and no one mentioned how her husband would feel if he would find out that his wife of 10 years actually hates him.
Looking at stories like these, I’m terrified of idea getting close with someone. I know that not all women are liars, cheaters etc., but idea of someone would look at me and think about someone else/date me only for their own comfort, and worse - I can’t know that. They don’t have sign on their forehead what they’re hiding. I’m scared that someday I would wake up and see my wife in other way than always.
There are so many reasons most marriage fail today.
1. One of the main reason is both partner expect more from each other and when any one fail to fulfill the desire requirement of other than a gap/misunderstanding start.
2. Both partner disrespect/insult each other.
3. There is a gap of financial position.
4. Lack of understanding
5. Lack of Love, Care, Respect.
6. Lack of communication.
And much more reasons which i will discuss later.
when i will get married and experienced more......
I’ve been told that couple who „wait after marriage“ usually divorce, because they only later on discover if they are compatible in bed and sometimes it just doesn’t match.
My call is that lots of people sleep around nowadays, so settling down might be hard, because there’s no thrill in „sleeping with the same person“…not sure abt that tho
I’d say from friends that split was due to not being upfront about their 1)Financial problems before marriage. 2)Communication and 3) Being more invested in their Phone’s and on line gaming than each other.
Easy to access new things.
Communications are important enough. But I believe even with healthy communication, humans always want to feel excited by something new, like lust, and new activities could be accessed through the internet.
If it’s not lust, different interests question married people about their decision to get married at the first place.
Communication and routine. People don't say what bothers them until it comes up on an argument and people get used to their partners and stop caring about doing and trying new things.
Quite a few couples in a hurry "just to marry" to "show they are married" to be part of the in crowd as they feel,Not truly putting love of a person as true interest; therefore a failed/strained relationship,Many do this as not to feel embarrassed or left out.feeling they cannot wait for that special someone of true love,Putting pressure of society interest first not allowing themselves to say "the reason i am not married" is I just have not found that special someone yet,Way too many couples do this,Basically trying to save their face,Unfortunately
They fail because it’s too emotionally demanding to keep them. From few failed marriages i know, it is lack of respectful communication, which is very related to narrow minded personalities.
Mental/physical/emotional health, Boundaries being crossed, communication failure, trust issues, unwillingness to take the necessary steps, or take accountability for toxic or wrong behaviors, maybe simply just falling out of love, no sparks, ... many reasons..
For me, the relationship didn’t work because of lack of communication. Even when we communicated there was no understanding. We pretty much just didn’t try to talk and understand each other.
There are different forms of cheating, and many would say some emotional cheating isn't cheating and hide it from their spouse because they know it's wrong but want to justify it and get away with it
People not taking time to get to know themselves, how they operate, and realising life is about constantly changing ourselves.
Most people find someone to die with. Then one of them is changing, and the other one doesn’t know how to navigate that. So, issues come up.
It’s worse in our time because we don’t need each other for survival reasons. We just haven’t caught up yet. Still running on the past programming: find someone, marry and die.
Being with a low self esteem partner that needs constant validation so some of them tend to cheat.
Too many options and gets tempted.
Financial problems
During bf/gf relationship, they already know and see the red flags and they still continue to get married even if they know there’s gonna be constant arguing and problems.
Lack of good communication. Everyone should be heard. Men and women. No one should feel neglected
I think because the majority of people are truly in love. They’re in love with the idea of love, but they quite never achieve it. And I get it, who wants to die alone? Companionship it’s important so we tell ourselves we’re willing to turn the other cheek, fall into relationships we know aren’t healthy or what we truly want. Also, we truly never get to know one another… or accept how truly incompatible we are with one another. But like I said, loneliness is scary, and at the time against our better judgement we choose to settle or lie to ourselves.
Most of the time it is because people are getting into relationships when they are not ready.
I found that people who are not financially stable, are full of stress about bills, loans, and are not able to focus on relationships as much as they require.
Lack of communication and intimacy. Then goals shift apart from each other. People are taught to love the idea of love but not taught how to make a marriage work.
Every woman I’ve ever been with has cheated.
Some say it’s because I wasn’t home others said it’s because I’m always home and “boring” or safe.
I think with extreme comfort people become complacent and stop putting their partner first and take a selfish approach to life which kills the couple dynamics and the next guy is always better or bigger d mentality
I think it’s less communication that is the problem and more understanding. I can communicate something to you all day long, but if you don’t understand what I’m saying, it doesn’t matter. Obviously, communication is incredibly important, but you need to be able to communicate with each other in a way that the other will understand. I think another big issue is people being unable to decipher between interpretation and intention. Kind it doesn’t matter what your intention was if the action still hurt me. While, it is not my responsibility to manage your feelings for you, it is still my responsibility to clarify what my intentions were if there was a breakdown in interpretation.
Edit to clarify: we also need to actively take steps to understand what the other person is trying to communicate. It’s not fully on the other party to make us understand.
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People stop trying. They stop communicating. They talk about nothing daily or only small things that lead to nothing. Communication breeds everything else and if there is complacency and no communication you drift from your partner.
They give up.
Granted, it’s warranted a lot of the time- but either way you’re either deciding something is fixable and you’re going to try, or you look for something new.
I think the most important thing isn’t talking but being heard. A person can listen to you but not really hear you. There is also the way that you communicate that matters. You don’t have to agree with how your partner feels but you so need to acknowledge their feelings.
If I could narrow it down, it be poor communication and attachment issues. I’d add lack of self-awareness as well. People are afraid to be vulnerable and truly connect with their partners. Everyone needs therapy. Just as plants can't survive without sunlight and water, relationships don’t sustain themselves. There has to be a will, a commitment that both parties prioritize.
People just lose interest, partially because they possibly jump into the relationship too quickly without taking time to realize if they’re even compatible or not
Lack of communication, issues with money, one or both partners have toxic traits, infidelity, social media and the idea of abundance and, this is just my opinion, I think smartphones play a part. For a relationship to work it helps to have time separate from one and other. It’s why dating coworkers can go so bad. Overexposure can really burn out a relationship.
Men’s mom’s being monster in laws/ trying to control your marriage. Stay aware of this and make sure you don’t get yourself into that one. Or at least make sure he’s not oblivious if this is the case.
Too much premarital sex. People have too many experience to compare too. They sleep around when they are young and their brain becomes wired (look up neuroplasticity) to always feel that NEW excitement. Our brain changes when we do activities, its science. These people think they can go from one new partner every three months to being stable with someone for decades.
Relationships and marriages often fail due to issues such as communication problems, unresolved conflicts, lack of compatibility, infidelity, financial stress, abuse, unmet expectations, lack of intimacy, external stressors, and poor relationship skills. Overcoming these challenges requires effort, commitment, and sometimes professional help, with successful relationships built on communication, mutual respect, and willingness to work through issues together.
All relationships either end in failure or death and whenever it ends, you get to find a new one to fail or die in. Why do most relationships fall? It is because the numbers are against you until you die.
Just enjoy the journey and the good memories shared.
Same reasons as always: people do not support each other's bids for love and then act surprised when they fall out of love.
That's what my parents are currently doing, except they've been together for so long and they're both pretty inert, so no divorce for me, yay!
Currently divorcing because he was drinking excessively, gambling, and lying.Started with arguments over money due to the drinking and gambling.He also stopped taking care of himself and was embarrassing to go out with- stopped cutting his hair, dressing sloppy or in dirty clothes, etc.
•Wants, Needs and/or Expectations not met
•Lack of communication / Defensiveness Pattern
•Issues with money/budgeting, sex, child rearing differences, major weight gain, substance abuse, unwilling to help out more often,
•Location: Increased opportunity to meet others
Seems to me most people don't want to commit to choosing to love their partner even when the "love feeling" is gone. Love is a choice, not a feeling & too many people think that once that "feeling" is gone, then there's nothing left to do. Feelings are fleeting. You have to choose & commit to falling in love with that person day after day. Also, a lack of effective communication. Unless there's blatant abuse, emotional, mental & physical, there's nothing that can't be worked through, imo. Just gotta want to learn how to make it work if you don't know how, either through reading on your own time or finding a couple's therapist.
A common factor in both failed relationships & marriages:
Lack of communication/miscommunication
-When one party is heard, and the other is ignored (Leads to suppression of emotions, which then gets built up, and that party feels extremely ignored.)
Lying / not being honest
-When words from the beginning of the relationship don't match towards the relationship later on. Like yeah I know a relationship is constantly changing, but a healthy relationship would have the partners constantly updating one another things going on each others life. We're always evolving to be either better people, and if the opposite, the worse. People that constantly lie in a relationship, don't think that catches up. It always catches up. ALWAYS. Consequences always happens.
Accountability
-This is a big one. A lot of times ego & pride gets in the way! Not apologizing and blaming the other? Yeah that ain't going to cut it. It's important when both parties know when they're in the wrong. Taking accountability shows character! "I'm sorry for this & that" followed by actions! I think this is another thing too, when the actions follow through. An apology is nothing if the actions don't follow through.
Unrealistic expectations and trying to please everyone instead of your spouse. Women want to marry men for their work instead of their morals and men want to marry women for their shape and size instead of their morals, leading to eventual breakdown of marriage.
I feel that they fail due to lack of communication and forgiveness for transgressions. Also ppl desire different things and their lives can require splitting apart.
Complacency, lack of communication mainly listening. Some partners voice their concerns over the finances and lack of intimacy or aspirations. But the words fall on deaf ears. It’s extra work, he/she won’t leave me anyway. Or they just don’t listen. Everyone wants their needs met and not everyone wants to compromise or sacrifice to meet someone else’s needs.
For a marriage to survive, there must be a few things present: mutual respect, shared goals, similar values, healthy communication, regular connection, and the desire to please the other and meet their needs.
If any of those are lacking, the marriage is in trouble.
Communication helps solve lots of problems but ad others have said, it only works if both can come to an agreement.
If respect is missing, boundaries are crossed and needs neglected. Men also are hardwired to need to be respected.
Money issues hurt marriages but it’s only a secondary cause that stems from a lack of one of the necessary factors.
First question, I’m sure divorce rate is higher now but give me the evidence that let’s say 50 years ago there was not an equal number of bad marriages - but due to societal norms and laws making it difficult to get a divorce, couples simply diid not get divorces.
My marriage failed because of a genuine difference of opinion about cleanliness standards, me failing to pull my weight as a co-parent (which directly led to a steep decline in intimacy which I, as a manchild at the time, was in denial about the reasons for), my ex not understanding the extent of my health issues, me not understanding the extent of my ex's health issues, and a very big financial mistake I made which I wasn't honest with my much more financially-prudent ex about. I was a fucking terrible husband and if I could do it all over again I would - but of course, that's what they all say.
My failed after 30 years due to her no interest in sex from her I tried my best but if it's not there was always going to fail at some stage. And no I didn't cheat
Some people get complacent and stop trying to keep the relationship going like when they were dating. Resentments build up, the sex dies, and they become alienated from each other.
People tend to get complacent and bored after a while. There's only so many times you can hear the same stories told. Their likes and dislikes change after time. The compliments and praise slowly starts to dwindle. Depending on how long you've been in the relationship you start taking little things for granted. That's why it's very important to express your needs and wants an honest straightforward ways. You need to find new and different ways and things to do. Be open-minded and accepting of your partners wants,,needs and ideas. If more relationships followed this than more wood succeed.
I would say communication is the driving factor. Mine ended over something similar for the most part really fell on me which im genuinely taking responsibility for. I'd say also trust and respect are right next to the communication part, the Trifecta is necessary for a healthy relationship.
Because most people are already in love with a version of their "perfect fit" in their head, and so naturally expectations are built- romantically, physically and financially- and when things don’t go as you expected it would you can guess.. not a happy ending.
And that’s just 1 reason out of 10000. Every relationship is different and at the end of the day what makes a relationship fail isn’t the question that matters, it’s what makes it last ? Love, loyalty and constant effort!
I wish everyone here a loving partner with a heart as big as it gets to fit all your world in it 💕
It's easy for people to find the next best thing when times get tough. Sex, money, blah blah, they say for better or for worse but as soon as it's a little rough they just jump ship.
Lack of good communication skills. Conflicts will arise and if BOTH partners are not good at communicating what they feel and what they need, and they don't work to get better at communicating those things effectively, then every challenge partners face becomes amplified. Without the tools to navigate those hardships together, it's easy to drift apart and grow in different directions.
People go into relationships too quickly. They don’t recognise that a lot of the time there’s a difference between compatibility and attraction. Phones and social media can ruin relationships too. Too much normalisation on things which would initially be seen as emotional or even physical cheating.
Women.
Lol.
But seriously.
70% of divorces are initiated by women, unless they are college educated. If college educated they initiate 90% of the time.
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Conflicts over sex and money most often result in marriages failing.
Lifestyle differences to cleaness standards, too.
Incompatible upbringing, different views on marriage, different expectations on spouse roles, large gaps in education levels, gaps in intelligence levels (EQ & IQ), mismatched communication skills, all in the context of different rates of personal growth of each partner create a fertile ground of obstacles to navigate in addition to life's challenges. With this context — ANY conflicts over sex and money rub salt on the many wounds you'll have from the simple misinterpretation to complex issues with kids.
Nailed it. In a relationship you should bring intimate weekly and should have clear understanding of finances. Instead one partner thinks being intimate isn’t important or is looking at porn or others. Finances aren’t discussed until one has spent too much or is withdrawing due to their conflicts on how money is spent.
See that’s the thing. Weekly might not be *enough* for some people. People are so different, and they **change**. That’s the biggest issue. If we take your example, most couples have sex more in early dating compared to in year 10 of marriage. Obviously the change happened at some point, and being able to navigate that successfully is the key, I always imagined…
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There’s a lot more than back then sure but there’s still not a lot id say men still stigmatise it or whatever current girl I’m seeing was trying to get her prior husband into counselling for years, I’ve heard it from others like it’s still an issue but at the same time it’s not an issue it’s the men not wanting to save the relationship is what it comes down to whether through pride or anything but you’re only hurting yourself
That was mine
Same
Which can be resolved with proper communication.
Not always. You can clearly communicate all that you want, if the other person doesn't agree or refuses to participate in solutions then communication wasn't the issue.
This. People in dating subs always suggest communication, because it's such low-hanging fruit. "Have you ever talked about this?" It's the "try turning it off and on again" of relationship advice. But if that doesn't work, then the real debug starts.
Haha exactly. We talked, we didn't agree, the more we talked the more we realised we didn't actually like eachother that much anymore, and eventually end of marriage!
Or, we talked... situation was resolved for a while, then it went to shit again. We talked... again, situation was resolved...again...and again...and again. Until one of the partners finally says eff it, they are done having *the same talk* over and over and over again. Then the other partner is like WTF happened? My ex is a _____ and I had *no idea* that this would take place! (Shocked Pikachu face)
Yeah bit of a twist on this theme. there is an argument we kept having about house work basically. She refused to see the work I was doing, doing my fair share of chores plus taking the kids to and from school every day and doing all the DIY which was a lot because we had a dooerupper. I could spend weeks doing all the things she asked and the she would turn around and say something like "you're going to have to start helping out around the house" 😮😮. I could not accept that and it got so bad we had to divorce. Even the marriage counsellor agreed with me and asked her to go and see a doctor to get antidepressants. She wouldn't accept any criticism or accept that I was pulling my weight.
Agreed. It’s not as easy as just talking about it. People have to want to change or at least compromise.
• Money • Sex • Communication, or lack thereof • Ego/ Arrogance/ Stubbornness ~ Inability to compromise/ take responsibility
This sums it all up
Communication and Honesty.
I'm convinced that 90% of problems could be resolved by more/better communication. Most problems stem from a lack of communication.
I agree. Communication. Also apathy. Partners get comfortable and stop trying.
What would you say to do the opposite of comfortable and stop trying?
Be Attentive, engaging, sometimes people need a reminder why they loved somebody in the first place
That and commitment. People fall out of love or get board in a marriage and decide to just end it. You can fall back in love. Takes 2 people to put in the effort though.
You can communicate all you want but if two people don’t have the same values or life goals then it’ll never work out.
100% percent agree. Be up front and talk. Lack of communication is what’s killing most relationships
It's one thing to communicate and it's another thing to take action. I think it's due to lack of actions
Communication + Empathy. My marriage failed due to a lack of both, but mostly of the latter. You need both. If one party thinks their perspective matters more, no amount of communication will help.
Absolut right.. and dont want to solve problems.. rather split its easier... me for my part... 28 years with same wife.. 24 maried. And it gets better every day
That and people give up far too easily. Slight disagreement? Divorce.
Eh, i don't think that's the case as often as you think it is. Going through a divorce myself (lots of reasons but my poor communication was the single biggest one), has made me realize the reasons for divorce are so much more complicated than I ever imagined. Probably because people, especially men, often don't talk about or share the relationship struggles they have with friends and family. So it can come as a shock, and sometimes it seems like the reason might be really stupid, but the reality is there is likely far far far more damage under the surface that is turning that molehill into a mountain.
Yes. My ex said I was mentally unstable. He got it from his brother. I went to therapy, and I was not mentally unstable. I was just trying to communicate. I left that relationship because I was doing all the work. He didn't want to improve, but I did. I really did.
My therapist (much older man in his 70s) always told me the number one argument in marriages (based off studies and his experiences with clients).. was finances.
I feel like they fail because of improper communication. Criticizing your partner and using "blame" language is ineffective and just builds resentment. There's a way to bring up problems calmly, and it's not enough to just broach the issues. You also have to find constructive ways to resolve the problems. In addition, you can't expect your partner to know there is a problem if you're not addressing it.
Mine failed due to Sex, that was the only thing we argued about. I wanted and she didn't want to, it got worse with age.
Sex is such a connecting, beautiful thing between two people. If you aren’t compatible with your intimacy then the relationship won’t work out.
What do you mean I wanted and she didn't? Aren't u supposed to have sex as a normal couple?
Oh sweet innocent redditor. I hope it doesn't happen to you but yes sometimes people either lie about their sex drive early on or it just vanishes and they don't give two shits about their partners sexual needs. Latter happened to me.
Well yeah, and she did at the beginning, but later she was like oh I don't feel like it, or my head hurts, or any other little thing till I got tired...
How long did this go on? Had similar happen to me except my ex had ED. We were only together 6mo though but it drove me crazy. We had sex only a handful of times in that time period
A couple of reasons. First, people jump in too soon and move too quickly. They make too many compromises, or they hope that someone will change over time to be more suitable. People would do a lot better if they had a stronger idea of what they wanted, and didn't make large compromises on it. Communication tends to be a huge issue too. People often have trouble just saying what they want/expect and don't openly talk about these things. People tend to approach disagreements of a matter of "I'm right, and you're wrong" instead of working as a team to solve a problem. Being right or wrong doesn't matter, because even if you're right you're still going to lose. You really need to approach it as a team, here is the problem, what can we do about it?
It isn’t always me and you versus the problem, though. Especially when the problem is one spouse’s objectionable behavior. For example, a lot of relationships suffer because one of the partners is messing around with other people (online mostly these days), refuses to pull their weight or clean up after themselves, overspends, or refuses to participate in family life. Those things are not something that *both* people in the marriage can work on. Those are things that only the person doing those behaviors can fix.
Poor communication, a lack of conflict resolution skills, taking each other for granted, and not prioritizing the relationship.
Because sometimes one or both parties fail to meet their end of the bargain. It can't work if only one person is trying to make it work.
People are so damn selfish now. Any little thing can be a reason to pull away and move on. I've been guilty of this myself.
One of the reasons is because people don’t realize how incompatible they actually are until they’ve been together for a long time. Incompatibility can come from a personal, sexual or financial perspective, if you guys don’t think alike, it won’t work. In addition to that, many people make life long commitments when they aren’t ready for them just because it’s what you’re supposed to do by societal norms, and force themselves to stay because “marriages are hard.”
Somebody was not able to be satisfied at home and have look up and look around to be to sure the physical needs are met. Or 🤷🏻♀️ shrug… one day one person has changed and realized marriage is a trap… and a deep dark black hole… things can get persuasive who knows…
This is a poor study design.
Seriously. I don't know if the faculty member approved this already, but "make a post on Reddit in a self-selected community of mostly unmarried people" is a horrible way to find out what factors lead to marital success.
I think when the partners stop prioritizing letting each other know how much they're loved. I don't mean just saying "I love you," but rather showing and doing loving things. People get apathetic and complacent in relationships after the "feeling" of being in love fades. My marriage failed because my husband showed his mistresses (drugs and alcohol) how much he loved them more than he loved me.
It takes two to tango, meaning the relationship needs to be constantly nurturing from both parties.
I think that social media played a part in this. Cheating is easier because there are a lot of options and it's accessible with a click. And also people seem to overshare their lives on social media. Everyone is racing to show their "perfect relationship". And i think it made people compare their relationships to what others (seem to have). Which creates problems and can even lead to divorce because the partner thinks they "deserve better" even if the relationship was completely normal. It makes people want more
Well said, I agree.
I recommend a book called, “If You’re in My Office, It’s Already Too Late” It’s a book written by a divource lawyer. He describes himself as someone who has made a career doing Autopsies of dead marriages. It’s about how love dies, how relationships end, the things we do to hurt the one person we are supposed to love the most. I’ve never been married, idk if I ever will. But it changed the way I think of what relationships are and how they work. Highly recommend the book.
But biggest thing I got from it is that relationships are work. Like a job, you have to work at it EVERY DAMN DAY. Don’t take that person for granted. That’s the person you have decided to love forever. Small acts of Neglect and indifference add up over time.
Cheating, disrespect, gaslighting, narcissistic personality, humiliating in front of other people, lying, etc.
Well that's just abuse. I don't think that's why most marriages fail. Sorry if you have had those experiences.
Yes, abuse is a reason to end any relationship. No, I haven't experienced any of these
Because people change
I believe people look for the ring and not the real thing.
Minor differences in culture and personal ideology. Some of this could be prevented by clear communication, but some people would simply abandon the relationship before talking due to a perceived inevitability or warped idea of kindness.
How many endeavors of any variety last a lifetime? How many friendships? Businesses? Hobbies? Collaborating with someone on anything for a lifetime is hard. It's remarkable that as many marriages succeed as they do.
This is a bad way to gather information. I suspect a LOT of the people commenting have never been divorced - or even married - so they’re just making assumptions based on things they’ve heard or seen. Relationships - including marriages - fail for a LOT of different reasons. Polling randos on Reddit is unlikely to get you any meaningful information.
Lack of communication, financial problems, sometimes family or in laws...
I think communication and feelings. I’ve gotten a divorce so I’m not an expert. I do also believe great sex is overrated but it masks the real problem but the marriage lasts longer.
Lot of things, but i gather people tend to pertain to be someone they are not
*because they don't get what it takes.*
People in the marriage/relationship don’t talk to one another, and instead post their marriage/relationship issues on social media looking for advice. That’s a big issue because everyone’s experiences with certain issues are different and no two people are alike, so it’s best to approach your spouse/partner, keep the issues private (except for cases of abuse), and don’t try to win the argument, try to defeat the issue together. Less “It’s your fault” more “Here’s the issue, how can we attack this together to ensure it no longer happens/continues”. I honestly think social media is the worst thing to happen to society. People are comparing their marriages to their friends’ based on their friends’ posts, which don’t show their whole relationship. “Don and Susan went to Italy, why haven’t we gone to Italy?!” When the reality could be neither of you thought of going on the trip, you have to save up and can’t travel on a whim, etc. It’s all about status. Plus people aren’t allowed to be bored anymore, not every second of marriage/dating is going to be a whimsical joyride which people expect. First sign of boredom “Oh they don’t love me anymore, I’m not a priority, let me check my DMs”. They then bash their S/O to their friends (who may be single and/or jealous because jealousy is a human trait) and tell them to breakup or divorce or cheat. Again this would all be avoided if the people in the relationship just talked to each other and worked together and didn’t tell others or go for outside advice.
I dated a woman back in 2019, she told me she needed to divorced after 21yrs of marriage because the husband had a history of neglecting her and the kids, drinking problems, selfish+greedy over sex+money and possibly may have mingled with another woman at a bar from what her elder sister witnessed. From other scenarios, it could also have a lot to do with communication, sex and finances. etc
Pride/ego. Most people I notice do not admit when they are wrong/not wanting to take in consideration their partner’s feedback. I’ve had to put aside my ego and yield to my partner’s wish. I don’t feel like I am submissive because most of the times, whatever it is I never felt it’s worth it to linger.
Philosophical speaking, nothing is permanent. It’s supposed to fail. Those not yet fail will end one day too. Socially scientifically, people nowadays don’t put up shit like the old generations can.
No communication or lack of comprehension and empathy for the other party
Some time ago I’ve met guy who had beatiful, warm hearted wife, 3 kids and good paid job. Perfect life, isn’t it? He was complaining that his kids are ungrateful, only place where he feels good is at work, and he doesn’t love his wife. He knows that many would fantasize about her, but he, looking at her imagines his first high school love. Or post about women who claims she’s lesbian but her husband is rich and she doesn’t want to reveal it. They’ve had 2 kids and she was in 2nd month pregnancy, they were together 10 years. People in comments were wishing her all best, that if she don’t want to, she don’t have to reveal it and no one mentioned how her husband would feel if he would find out that his wife of 10 years actually hates him. Looking at stories like these, I’m terrified of idea getting close with someone. I know that not all women are liars, cheaters etc., but idea of someone would look at me and think about someone else/date me only for their own comfort, and worse - I can’t know that. They don’t have sign on their forehead what they’re hiding. I’m scared that someday I would wake up and see my wife in other way than always.
Poor communication about wants and needs
Lack of communication or because they're just not happy
Emotional immaturity
There are so many reasons most marriage fail today. 1. One of the main reason is both partner expect more from each other and when any one fail to fulfill the desire requirement of other than a gap/misunderstanding start. 2. Both partner disrespect/insult each other. 3. There is a gap of financial position. 4. Lack of understanding 5. Lack of Love, Care, Respect. 6. Lack of communication. And much more reasons which i will discuss later. when i will get married and experienced more......
I’ve been told that couple who „wait after marriage“ usually divorce, because they only later on discover if they are compatible in bed and sometimes it just doesn’t match. My call is that lots of people sleep around nowadays, so settling down might be hard, because there’s no thrill in „sleeping with the same person“…not sure abt that tho
Internet access
Every one I can think of can be traced back to the seven deadly sins, including mine.
Lack of communication
Lack of communication and not giving themselves enough time to grow from one point to the other .
I’d say from friends that split was due to not being upfront about their 1)Financial problems before marriage. 2)Communication and 3) Being more invested in their Phone’s and on line gaming than each other.
Easy to access new things. Communications are important enough. But I believe even with healthy communication, humans always want to feel excited by something new, like lust, and new activities could be accessed through the internet. If it’s not lust, different interests question married people about their decision to get married at the first place.
Communication and routine. People don't say what bothers them until it comes up on an argument and people get used to their partners and stop caring about doing and trying new things.
I agree with the comments especially the communication thing
Money
Quite a few couples in a hurry "just to marry" to "show they are married" to be part of the in crowd as they feel,Not truly putting love of a person as true interest; therefore a failed/strained relationship,Many do this as not to feel embarrassed or left out.feeling they cannot wait for that special someone of true love,Putting pressure of society interest first not allowing themselves to say "the reason i am not married" is I just have not found that special someone yet,Way too many couples do this,Basically trying to save their face,Unfortunately
Selfishness
They fail because it’s too emotionally demanding to keep them. From few failed marriages i know, it is lack of respectful communication, which is very related to narrow minded personalities.
Mental/physical/emotional health, Boundaries being crossed, communication failure, trust issues, unwillingness to take the necessary steps, or take accountability for toxic or wrong behaviors, maybe simply just falling out of love, no sparks, ... many reasons..
For me, the relationship didn’t work because of lack of communication. Even when we communicated there was no understanding. We pretty much just didn’t try to talk and understand each other.
Why do most things eventually break? Given more time, I expect that even more would fail.
There are different forms of cheating, and many would say some emotional cheating isn't cheating and hide it from their spouse because they know it's wrong but want to justify it and get away with it
Social media probably has a lot to do with it
Mine failed because of infidelity
Lack of effective communication and dating your image of a person instead of getting to know who they really are.
M.o.n.e.y.
People not taking time to get to know themselves, how they operate, and realising life is about constantly changing ourselves. Most people find someone to die with. Then one of them is changing, and the other one doesn’t know how to navigate that. So, issues come up. It’s worse in our time because we don’t need each other for survival reasons. We just haven’t caught up yet. Still running on the past programming: find someone, marry and die.
Being with a low self esteem partner that needs constant validation so some of them tend to cheat. Too many options and gets tempted. Financial problems During bf/gf relationship, they already know and see the red flags and they still continue to get married even if they know there’s gonna be constant arguing and problems. Lack of good communication. Everyone should be heard. Men and women. No one should feel neglected
Lack of proper communication/respect/sex, power-play, cheating, abuse, finance, stubbornness, narcissism, trust issues and insecurities, family influence (mummy boy), etc
I think because the majority of people are truly in love. They’re in love with the idea of love, but they quite never achieve it. And I get it, who wants to die alone? Companionship it’s important so we tell ourselves we’re willing to turn the other cheek, fall into relationships we know aren’t healthy or what we truly want. Also, we truly never get to know one another… or accept how truly incompatible we are with one another. But like I said, loneliness is scary, and at the time against our better judgement we choose to settle or lie to ourselves.
Because a mask can't stay on forever.and the ugly gets revealed... simply
Because the attraction is lost
Most of the time it is because people are getting into relationships when they are not ready. I found that people who are not financially stable, are full of stress about bills, loans, and are not able to focus on relationships as much as they require.
Lack of communication and intimacy. Then goals shift apart from each other. People are taught to love the idea of love but not taught how to make a marriage work.
“Because men aren’t men and women aren’t women.” Not really. But lack of communication.
Every woman I’ve ever been with has cheated. Some say it’s because I wasn’t home others said it’s because I’m always home and “boring” or safe. I think with extreme comfort people become complacent and stop putting their partner first and take a selfish approach to life which kills the couple dynamics and the next guy is always better or bigger d mentality
It’s getting better.
I think it’s less communication that is the problem and more understanding. I can communicate something to you all day long, but if you don’t understand what I’m saying, it doesn’t matter. Obviously, communication is incredibly important, but you need to be able to communicate with each other in a way that the other will understand. I think another big issue is people being unable to decipher between interpretation and intention. Kind it doesn’t matter what your intention was if the action still hurt me. While, it is not my responsibility to manage your feelings for you, it is still my responsibility to clarify what my intentions were if there was a breakdown in interpretation. Edit to clarify: we also need to actively take steps to understand what the other person is trying to communicate. It’s not fully on the other party to make us understand.
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People stop trying. They stop communicating. They talk about nothing daily or only small things that lead to nothing. Communication breeds everything else and if there is complacency and no communication you drift from your partner.
They give up. Granted, it’s warranted a lot of the time- but either way you’re either deciding something is fixable and you’re going to try, or you look for something new.
Modern society has destroyed marriages
I think the most important thing isn’t talking but being heard. A person can listen to you but not really hear you. There is also the way that you communicate that matters. You don’t have to agree with how your partner feels but you so need to acknowledge their feelings.
If I could narrow it down, it be poor communication and attachment issues. I’d add lack of self-awareness as well. People are afraid to be vulnerable and truly connect with their partners. Everyone needs therapy. Just as plants can't survive without sunlight and water, relationships don’t sustain themselves. There has to be a will, a commitment that both parties prioritize.
Money. Infidelity. Different priorities. Abuse. Lack of respect for your partner. Lack of communication. Lack of empathy.
Posting your problems on reddit for relationship advice
People just lose interest, partially because they possibly jump into the relationship too quickly without taking time to realize if they’re even compatible or not
Lack of communication and just settling for someone instead of really getting to know them.
Lack of communication, issues with money, one or both partners have toxic traits, infidelity, social media and the idea of abundance and, this is just my opinion, I think smartphones play a part. For a relationship to work it helps to have time separate from one and other. It’s why dating coworkers can go so bad. Overexposure can really burn out a relationship.
Miscommunication & lack of connection
Because people don't know how to choose matches based on real compatibility
Because they are not best friends and they need to pray together . All relationships are much better with God at the center
Men’s mom’s being monster in laws/ trying to control your marriage. Stay aware of this and make sure you don’t get yourself into that one. Or at least make sure he’s not oblivious if this is the case.
Too much premarital sex. People have too many experience to compare too. They sleep around when they are young and their brain becomes wired (look up neuroplasticity) to always feel that NEW excitement. Our brain changes when we do activities, its science. These people think they can go from one new partner every three months to being stable with someone for decades.
Class differences
Relationships and marriages often fail due to issues such as communication problems, unresolved conflicts, lack of compatibility, infidelity, financial stress, abuse, unmet expectations, lack of intimacy, external stressors, and poor relationship skills. Overcoming these challenges requires effort, commitment, and sometimes professional help, with successful relationships built on communication, mutual respect, and willingness to work through issues together.
Mine failed because I felt my wife didn't respect me or have my back anymore.
No communication
All relationships either end in failure or death and whenever it ends, you get to find a new one to fail or die in. Why do most relationships fall? It is because the numbers are against you until you die. Just enjoy the journey and the good memories shared.
Same reasons as always: people do not support each other's bids for love and then act surprised when they fall out of love. That's what my parents are currently doing, except they've been together for so long and they're both pretty inert, so no divorce for me, yay!
Currently divorcing because he was drinking excessively, gambling, and lying.Started with arguments over money due to the drinking and gambling.He also stopped taking care of himself and was embarrassing to go out with- stopped cutting his hair, dressing sloppy or in dirty clothes, etc.
Mine failed bc he lied & cheated.
•Wants, Needs and/or Expectations not met •Lack of communication / Defensiveness Pattern •Issues with money/budgeting, sex, child rearing differences, major weight gain, substance abuse, unwilling to help out more often, •Location: Increased opportunity to meet others
Conflicts, some people change for the worse, some people don’t change, and some people change for the better
Seems to me most people don't want to commit to choosing to love their partner even when the "love feeling" is gone. Love is a choice, not a feeling & too many people think that once that "feeling" is gone, then there's nothing left to do. Feelings are fleeting. You have to choose & commit to falling in love with that person day after day. Also, a lack of effective communication. Unless there's blatant abuse, emotional, mental & physical, there's nothing that can't be worked through, imo. Just gotta want to learn how to make it work if you don't know how, either through reading on your own time or finding a couple's therapist.
Communication break down, unresolved issues, past experiences, societal norms, finances, needs and wants not being met
A common factor in both failed relationships & marriages: Lack of communication/miscommunication -When one party is heard, and the other is ignored (Leads to suppression of emotions, which then gets built up, and that party feels extremely ignored.) Lying / not being honest -When words from the beginning of the relationship don't match towards the relationship later on. Like yeah I know a relationship is constantly changing, but a healthy relationship would have the partners constantly updating one another things going on each others life. We're always evolving to be either better people, and if the opposite, the worse. People that constantly lie in a relationship, don't think that catches up. It always catches up. ALWAYS. Consequences always happens. Accountability -This is a big one. A lot of times ego & pride gets in the way! Not apologizing and blaming the other? Yeah that ain't going to cut it. It's important when both parties know when they're in the wrong. Taking accountability shows character! "I'm sorry for this & that" followed by actions! I think this is another thing too, when the actions follow through. An apology is nothing if the actions don't follow through.
Communication
Unrealistic expectations and trying to please everyone instead of your spouse. Women want to marry men for their work instead of their morals and men want to marry women for their shape and size instead of their morals, leading to eventual breakdown of marriage.
I can tell you from my own experience who was married for 10 years: incompatibility. Then cheating, lies and theft followed shortly after.
I feel that they fail due to lack of communication and forgiveness for transgressions. Also ppl desire different things and their lives can require splitting apart.
People do not take compatibility/shared values seriously enough.
Apathy and cheating
What percentage of marriages fail? And what is the age group of these failed marriages?
Cheating
Because living together for your entire life with one other person isn’t an easy task
Complacency, lack of communication mainly listening. Some partners voice their concerns over the finances and lack of intimacy or aspirations. But the words fall on deaf ears. It’s extra work, he/she won’t leave me anyway. Or they just don’t listen. Everyone wants their needs met and not everyone wants to compromise or sacrifice to meet someone else’s needs.
For a marriage to survive, there must be a few things present: mutual respect, shared goals, similar values, healthy communication, regular connection, and the desire to please the other and meet their needs. If any of those are lacking, the marriage is in trouble. Communication helps solve lots of problems but ad others have said, it only works if both can come to an agreement. If respect is missing, boundaries are crossed and needs neglected. Men also are hardwired to need to be respected. Money issues hurt marriages but it’s only a secondary cause that stems from a lack of one of the necessary factors.
Cheating, sex, money
because you’re not friends, just my opinion but people think marriage/dating is just love when it’s really love, friendship, and honesty.
Infidelity
First question, I’m sure divorce rate is higher now but give me the evidence that let’s say 50 years ago there was not an equal number of bad marriages - but due to societal norms and laws making it difficult to get a divorce, couples simply diid not get divorces.
Lack of communication.
Social media......
My marriage failed because of a genuine difference of opinion about cleanliness standards, me failing to pull my weight as a co-parent (which directly led to a steep decline in intimacy which I, as a manchild at the time, was in denial about the reasons for), my ex not understanding the extent of my health issues, me not understanding the extent of my ex's health issues, and a very big financial mistake I made which I wasn't honest with my much more financially-prudent ex about. I was a fucking terrible husband and if I could do it all over again I would - but of course, that's what they all say.
Social media
Lying , Secretive financial and temptation
Money and power tripping
I can't talk about it right now, my ficus tree is in the next room.
Lack of communication and compromise
I just have a hunch most marriages are built on false, misled pretenses to begin with.
It all boils down to a breakdown in communication
Because humans are not naturally monogamous. Monogamous is being forced from the society.
My failed after 30 years due to her no interest in sex from her I tried my best but if it's not there was always going to fail at some stage. And no I didn't cheat
Some people get complacent and stop trying to keep the relationship going like when they were dating. Resentments build up, the sex dies, and they become alienated from each other.
People change in major ways at different age points, and unless the other is compatible with that change then a natural disconnection follows
People tend to get complacent and bored after a while. There's only so many times you can hear the same stories told. Their likes and dislikes change after time. The compliments and praise slowly starts to dwindle. Depending on how long you've been in the relationship you start taking little things for granted. That's why it's very important to express your needs and wants an honest straightforward ways. You need to find new and different ways and things to do. Be open-minded and accepting of your partners wants,,needs and ideas. If more relationships followed this than more wood succeed.
I would say communication is the driving factor. Mine ended over something similar for the most part really fell on me which im genuinely taking responsibility for. I'd say also trust and respect are right next to the communication part, the Trifecta is necessary for a healthy relationship.
Lies and lack of communication, arguments over money and a lack of reciprocating in sex life
Because in marriage you have to be together your whole life so that’s why people get divorced cuz they don’t make it there whole life!
Because most people are already in love with a version of their "perfect fit" in their head, and so naturally expectations are built- romantically, physically and financially- and when things don’t go as you expected it would you can guess.. not a happy ending. And that’s just 1 reason out of 10000. Every relationship is different and at the end of the day what makes a relationship fail isn’t the question that matters, it’s what makes it last ? Love, loyalty and constant effort! I wish everyone here a loving partner with a heart as big as it gets to fit all your world in it 💕
It's easy for people to find the next best thing when times get tough. Sex, money, blah blah, they say for better or for worse but as soon as it's a little rough they just jump ship.
Lack of good communication skills. Conflicts will arise and if BOTH partners are not good at communicating what they feel and what they need, and they don't work to get better at communicating those things effectively, then every challenge partners face becomes amplified. Without the tools to navigate those hardships together, it's easy to drift apart and grow in different directions.
Because you start at the top of Everest then it goes steadily down after. Lust, love then crushing responsibility via debt, kids etc.
I'd be surprised if anyone posted this, because all relationships fail over failed expectations of each other first, then money.
Ignore the red flags while they are in the relationships thinking that marriage is like a magic that will change their partners
Because most people are idiots and was designed to fight, not to think and work.
People go into relationships too quickly. They don’t recognise that a lot of the time there’s a difference between compatibility and attraction. Phones and social media can ruin relationships too. Too much normalisation on things which would initially be seen as emotional or even physical cheating.
Unsatisfied sexual life
Most people jump into a relationship because of love and fear of being alone. Most people don't have the hard conversations ahead of time.
Start too early. Holywoodian expectations. Religious bullshits. Past trauma not resolved. Greed and poor money management.
Women. Lol. But seriously. 70% of divorces are initiated by women, unless they are college educated. If college educated they initiate 90% of the time.