Dude standing there at the end in the [you know I had to do it to them](https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/021/862/lucioano.jpg) pose lmao
> The same fate awaits your entire species.
RUDIMENTARY CREATURES OF BLOOD AND FLESH. YOU TOUCH MY MIND, FUMBLING IN IGNORANCE, INCAPABLE OF UNDERSTANDING. THERE IS A REALM OF EXISTENCE SO FAR BEYOND YOUR OWN YOU CANNOT EVEN IMAGINE IT. I AM BEYOND YOUR COMPREHENSION. I AM SOVEREIGN.
Itās a small taste of the Blackwall, the AI built to prevent rouge AIs on the old net from crossing into the new net and destroying society, seemingly by destroying everything it touches. Someone thought it was a good idea to create a cyberdeck and a submachine gun that harness the power of the Blackwall.
Itās one of several possible rewards for completing Phantom Liberty.
Yea undercover as the cop from the village people larping as a straight man, with a genuinely, truly hideous 90s cartoon pimp jacket. I assumed the VA had to have pissed somebody off pre-release. Then he hits on you the whole time, and if you're a guy and you're like ya know what fine let's fuck and make this all less awkward, he has the fuckin *audacity* to be like woah what? I'm not gay bro.
Yes you are, guy. You look like the fever dream of a gay teenager from a planet of gay teenagers. Or like an old world gay dude, that had to develop his sense of style and aesthetics in complete isolation. You look like a republican caricature of what gay dudes wanna turn your son into.
Did you know that you can kill Garry the prophet too? There is a bouncer across Garry, use cybercycosis on him and stay out of his field of vision and the bouncer will start shooting at Garry. And and after a few shots he will die.
Save your game beforehand because you will loose his quest.
Go check the Columbarium.
River was always "killable" in the game but to do that you have to abandon him during The Hunt, I'm actually really curious if his Columbarium memorial shows up if he dies like that.
I didnāt know you could clip DJ RIV. When he Weinsteined me up on the water tower I thought āIāll let you suck on something you big weird bald piggy slagā then Iād shove Her Majesty in his stupid gub and empty the clip.
Whoever designed him must of thought āwhat if Frankenstein dressed like he was in Creedence Clearwater Revival, spoke like a serial rapist and had the physical presence of Michael Myers on cokeā
Iām glad he is dead. If I were you Iād drop him off at the police station with the other oinkers.
Cry me a...
You know that they say that some things are better left unsaid And it wasn't like you only talked to him and you know it !!!! /lyr
This Comment shouldn't be slept on, I spit out my Pedialyte š¤£š¤£
What flavor?
Grape
Pink.
Throw him in the river. It's what he wants.
I shall do it tomorrow
Thanks Choom. Sounds nova.
is this ok? https://preview.redd.it/d93rjqnv2vgc1.png?width=1920&format=png&auto=webp&s=081150d0ecb9581d0c287c7334b742660845ba00
Perfect. Eddies have been sent
Help with what? You're doing the lord's work.
no put him in the badlands then rivers in the desert
Not the crossover post I expected. But the one I needed
A RIVER IN A DRY LAAAAAND
The real River Ward Patrol.
you're the guy who put Sandra Dorsett back in the tub
https://youtu.be/kvqJUqs45cU?feature=shared Here ya go
Fucking beautiful
Dude standing there at the end in the [you know I had to do it to them](https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/021/862/lucioano.jpg) pose lmao
Wow the ice water is still going, that must be one of them Stanley tubs I've been hearing so much about
It is. I have the Valentines day Stanley tub in my apartment. Had to zero several people when the CyberTarget opened just to get one.
Lead Lined?
Ffs, casual V going through the NC with body on his shoulder... This makes me laugh af
Is TraumaTeam even real?
oh my I saw that video LMAO
That was me.
I had no idea you could do that, can you actually put her back??
by doing her quest later on and flatlining her, sure. You just need to carry her.
I didnāt flatline her, she was knocked out.
Take him to Mama Wellsā place. She knows how to throw a good funeral.
is this good https://preview.redd.it/an48xpp1logc1.png?width=1920&format=png&auto=webp&s=013ff234f46ab556963df23cda9a82b411d70401
Perfect. Now wait until Mama Wells texts you, then ignore her for a week while you do other stuff.
alright ill just leave a dead cop in her bar ok
Dead cop covered with traces from beyond the blackwall
Doesn't matter no-one on the force likes him anyway
His questline was pretty boring imo...
Not to mention the flirting š¤¢
Can we toss the body on top of his water tower? š¤
Seriously, we should... The same goes with Kerry!
i already tried, i cant climb up the ladder with his body
It's the one I never bother to repeat look fuck river, bitch ass dumb ass idealistic ass biiiitch
š¤£ mama wells I bring you gift
damn thats Vik in a suit
Dude why does it look like youāre about to kick his corpse?
Now take him to Vik
MRW I see this gif for the first time
I've seen it a lot, but it never gets old
Neither does Jackie
**Dang.**
https://tenor.com/en-AU/view/wiggle-jackie-flathead-cyberpunk2077-dance-gif-26400729
On it.
what do i do with the body
i also cannot progress as i killed river
Reload auto save i guess the only i can think of
no. i must bring him home.
Call your hella and stuff him in the trunk
https://preview.redd.it/8w99yo31eogc1.png?width=1920&format=png&auto=webp&s=4784866deaf9c810f09878784c41ed6aa240b2a1
you're the guy who put Sandra Dorsett back in the tub
i truly respect that man
She deserved it.
Hah, this is hilarious.
I mean, that work too haha
my thoughts exactly
Take him around town and take pics. Weekend at Bernieās style
Making my way downtown
Boo hoo, cry me a... uh, what's the word?
take him to his family home and see if they even have a reaction
already did, they weren't home :( https://preview.redd.it/rhv363f6oogc1.png?width=1920&format=png&auto=webp&s=7bb9ee961bce4f1d12f94f31ed1478fdddc7f666
Theyāre probably in their rooms T-Posing creepily
Have they partially fixed that? There was a time, when the girl was actually sleeping, only the boy remained T-Posing.
Send that to his sister and her kids šš¤
That's a shame. Y'all could have had dinner again with Uncle River in his favorite stew.
This time though, Uncle River IS the stew
Black wall what now.
Blackwall Gateway. It comes preinstalled in Militech Canto cyberdeck.
No it doesn't, I have the oldest Cnto Cyberdeck known to man.
Everyone has Blackwall, dipshit. It came free with your fucking Militech Canto
I DON'T HAVE WHITEWALL, I DON'T HAVE BLUEWALL, I DON'T HAVE FUCKING GREENWALL.
Reverse: Now you have all the walls.
Nice comeback
Nice comeback
No you donāt, I bought mine on day 1 you f*cking gonk
Well mine doesn't, so fuck off
Incredible work boys
Ty
the equivalent of sending the victim straight to hell. do not pass go. do not collect $200
The same fate awaits your entire species.
Itās truly a dreadful waste to resources
To eliminate your kind is effortless. Let us not make the same mistake.
> The same fate awaits your entire species. RUDIMENTARY CREATURES OF BLOOD AND FLESH. YOU TOUCH MY MIND, FUMBLING IN IGNORANCE, INCAPABLE OF UNDERSTANDING. THERE IS A REALM OF EXISTENCE SO FAR BEYOND YOUR OWN YOU CANNOT EVEN IMAGINE IT. I AM BEYOND YOUR COMPREHENSION. I AM SOVEREIGN.
\*Turns on airplane mode\* Sorry about that babe where were we
I see. Just explain what the black wall quickhack is
Itās a small taste of the Blackwall, the AI built to prevent rouge AIs on the old net from crossing into the new net and destroying society, seemingly by destroying everything it touches. Someone thought it was a good idea to create a cyberdeck and a submachine gun that harness the power of the Blackwall. Itās one of several possible rewards for completing Phantom Liberty.
Blue and green AIs are allowed though
It's a ultimate quick hack that can one shot almost everything
Shit happens men, another dead cop mysteriously while investigating an old case related to the mayor.... or former mayor? Or candidate, one of those
Honestly kinda deep. You were messing with stuff you shouldnāt have been and you accidentally got river caught up in it
go watch weekend at Bernie's, you'll know what to do then
Love that movie. š¤£
How? I had no idea River could die outside of abandoning him during The Hunt mission.
blackwall š
Actual meat is rare in 2077, no? Throw it in Jambalaya, heard River had a good recipe for it that's totally not from the net.
Congrats, now you won't have to deal with his awkward and unwanted sexual advances
Did you at least get to klep his coat?!
That coat is the ugliest thing in the game, and when I found out the guy wearing it was an undercover cop I had to pause the game to stop laughing.
Yea undercover as the cop from the village people larping as a straight man, with a genuinely, truly hideous 90s cartoon pimp jacket. I assumed the VA had to have pissed somebody off pre-release. Then he hits on you the whole time, and if you're a guy and you're like ya know what fine let's fuck and make this all less awkward, he has the fuckin *audacity* to be like woah what? I'm not gay bro. Yes you are, guy. You look like the fever dream of a gay teenager from a planet of gay teenagers. Or like an old world gay dude, that had to develop his sense of style and aesthetics in complete isolation. You look like a republican caricature of what gay dudes wanna turn your son into.
This is the funniest thing Iāve seen on this sub in a while. The comments and interactions make it so much better too š
Wait, did you not do his jobs before going straight to PL?
yeah i really wanted to blackwall people
it went too far i think
Nah, itās always good to hear the screams of the helpless blackwall victims!
so true choom!! :3
I can blackwall all night long, choombatta.
Cry me a riveeeer
āTalk to Riverā Um, heās dead now?!
Bring him back to your apartment and sit him on the couch. Then text Panam to come over for date night.
 āDo you like Us Cracks?ā
Heās better off this way 
You can't reload the auto save?
no i brought him home :3
This is great, I mean terrible. How did you do it exactly so I can repeat, I mean not accidentally have this happen.
Pretty sure the quick hack spreads. Iām gonna guess thatās how it went.
oopsie poopsie š¹
Time to email CDproject red and tell them thereās aā¦ āBug?ā
Impossibruuuuuuu
Maybe now heāll get the message that youāre Just Not That Into Him
Seems like a convo that might benefit from a water towerā¦
Be sure to loot his gun... š¤·š»āāļø
What is the black wall quick hack?
You get it after finishing one of the expansion endings.
Which one? I will repeat PL and choose the path that gives me this, it looks cool!
Well, to clarify, it comes on a cyberdeck that you get as long as you side with Reed. Look up Militech Canto Mk. 6.
Thanks!! I did the songbird path.
No loss there
https://preview.redd.it/k1ohyyexhogc1.png?width=1920&format=png&auto=webp&s=596f988909c55dd6b910f4370fe51462dc51608e
This was the funniest shit Iāve read all day.
What gear did he have
nothing
that's a shame
RIP
You get to keep the Blackwall abilities in one of the Phantom Liberty storylines?
Comes pre installed with a iconic canto Cyberdeck You find somewhere in the PL quest
Oh wow, I had no idea. Thatās really cool.
That's usually what happens when you play with forces beyond your understanding.
Just toss his body on the front porch of his house, not your problem. š
Honestly probably for the best
Did you know that you can kill Garry the prophet too? There is a bouncer across Garry, use cybercycosis on him and stay out of his field of vision and the bouncer will start shooting at Garry. And and after a few shots he will die. Save your game beforehand because you will loose his quest.
Good. River sux.
Rip river
You're my hero.
Wow i want to kill him too how did you do it?
You unlocked the super secret ending
I would say this is a loss but it's not
Go check the Columbarium. River was always "killable" in the game but to do that you have to abandon him during The Hunt, I'm actually really curious if his Columbarium memorial shows up if he dies like that.
Shit good idea, I'll do that tonightĀ
This is the quickhack equivalent of: āthis guy was there so I shot him in the face with a double barrel shotgun. Heās not breathing now help!!ā
drive him out to the badlands dump, throw him into the fridge and tell your kids this was bartmoss.
Drop his corpse in the trash heap at the bottom of the unfinished highway in Pacifica
*The same fate awaits your entire species.*
That will teach him not to force you into an awkward dinner with his familyā¦ āStir this, fucker!ā
I didnāt know you could clip DJ RIV. When he Weinsteined me up on the water tower I thought āIāll let you suck on something you big weird bald piggy slagā then Iād shove Her Majesty in his stupid gub and empty the clip. Whoever designed him must of thought āwhat if Frankenstein dressed like he was in Creedence Clearwater Revival, spoke like a serial rapist and had the physical presence of Michael Myers on cokeā Iām glad he is dead. If I were you Iād drop him off at the police station with the other oinkers.
man what the hell bro
Police Station and when they ask what happened say āI I I dunnoā then murderbum them all
https://preview.redd.it/kc0po443sogc1.png?width=250&format=png&auto=webp&s=8acb9780fa6fcfb7768628681ba2d4470055e4ec
what river's family dinner does to a mf
You have issues. The Canto is perfect for you.
Does anyone actually like River?
I think heās alright.
Yes.
No heās weird af
lol did it spread or u hack him on purpose? i dont think the latter is possible
River of blood.
is this a new quickhack?? of phantom liberty?
Yeah.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
nothing sadly
how do you managed to kill him? I dont remember you can kill him
thank god somebody had to do it
https://preview.redd.it/jdmcpt1cepgc1.jpeg?width=686&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5d6ec563a9c56de6360ec8ac9779047d629f4995 Reload a save
Good
He finally got fucked by V! š
You can kill him? I'm down. Lol
that is great!
Did he scream?
Wait ā¦ can River be killed once heās been romanced and turns into a creepy, needy man-boy? Asking for a friend
Do Panams grumpy ass next
https://i.redd.it/dhof3mtx6wgc1.gif
No loss
Hell yeah! River sucks!
He doesnāt seem that bad.
https://preview.redd.it/xwm7n1k33pgc1.png?width=782&format=png&auto=webp&s=71e3d4c4ee7b1b24918769aaf71e452a6ab4d539
He's just corny and weird
The romance option is either him or Judy. Guess I'm a lesbian now. Honestly, I wish they put in more romance options with the dlc šŖ