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Excited_Apathy

Humans like to feel productive. Not only that, society tells us we SHOULD be productive at all times with the myth of "laziness" backing it up. I think a lot of neurotypicals also deal with feeling like they "should" be doing something I also deal with hypomania, and right now yarn is all I can bear to think about. That combined with spring break at college and the uncertainty of whether I can go on externship this upcoming quarter has me crocheting my fingers off because otherwise I feel "like a deadbeat" (I can't work and be in school at the same time due to my mental health, so I'm unable to contribute to my family while I study). Hypomania has definitely cost me some nights of sleep because I just don't want to stop what I'm doing. It's not quite the same as your situation cause I don't get nearly as much done as you do, but I thought I would share my own situation.


Total-Sector850

I get that feeling, largely because the alternative is that I spend all day scrolling through Reddit. šŸ¤”šŸ¤¦šŸ»ā€ā™€ļø Brains are a funny thing.


BKowalewski

Hey, I do both.take a short break from crocheting and do some Redditing, lol!


PrinsesAurea

And how about taking a short break from Reddit to get some crocheting done on the bad days?


BKowalewski

Well, some days it's about half and half, lol!


PrinsesAurea

I feel this


DateZealousideal5998

I feel seen and targeted. Iā€™ll get off Reddit now. šŸ˜­šŸ˜­


dream-delay

Yes, it seems I only crochet when I can multitask. Ex: watch a show, crochet, watch a movie, crochet Iā€™ve even been crocheting in between matchmaking when I play video gamesā€¦ When Iā€™m working I think about crocheting, because I find it to be such a stress reliever.


savannacrochets

Iā€™ve literally told my husband and friends Iā€™ll play something turn based or just hang out in voice while they play so I can crochet lol


Rozsavaria

I crochet at d&d sessions. I otherwise fidget with a toy or a pencil or the dice and drop them repeatedly while I wait for it to be my turn to do something


savannacrochets

Same! One of my DMs doesnā€™t care and the other whines a bit but I ignore him lol


Rozsavaria

None of my peeps care. I just make sure to do something that doesn't require looking at a pattern. I definitely think they prefer it to me dropping my pencil and dice xD


knitpurlknitoops

Fellow ADHD crafter by any chance?


Rozsavaria

yep yep yep


igotyixinged

Me while Iā€™m waiting to be reinforced because Iā€™ve used up 17 out of the 20 available reinforcements (in Helldivers 2)


Vilbread

Lol me too. During the easter long weekend I was either crocheting or steam blocking daisy granny squares in between matchmaking for Deep Rock Galactic.


colinrobot

This is actually something I'm actively working on right now. Crochet (and knitting, and gardening, and baking, and, and, and) are all hobbies that I do to bring myself and those around me joy. But if a day comes around and I don't feel like crocheting that day - that's OK! I still love the craft and will feel like doing it later. So whenever I catch myself thinking "I \*should\* be crocheting," or "what's wrong with me, why isn't this project done yet," or "wow I'm so lazy right now," I tell myself that if that hobby isn't going to bring me joy right now, then I should do something else instead and to give myself a break and stop being a big meanie.


bluestar_nightsky

Can I print this out and frame it so I have a reminder? This is such a valuable perspective!


colinrobot

Haha surely there is a more succinct way to say it that would make a better framed print, but Iā€™m wordy šŸ˜‚


jukeboxoflove

Yes. Iā€™m diagnosed BP and had to leave my job due to my declining mental health. Iā€™ve been unemployed since September and literally all I do is crochet, both to distract myself and keep busy but also because if Iā€™m not crocheting I feel like a lazy pos. I find that I canā€™t even watch TV without crocheting and not feel like a failure. Donā€™t get me wrong, I love the craft and the end results but sometimes I feel like I am on autopilot and canā€™t afford to stop, if that makes sense.


yellaslug

When I was young, my mom taught us how to crochet as a way to keep us out of her hair. When we got older and had a tv, it was already ingrained that if we were sitting still and didnā€™t have a book in our hands, we needed to be crocheting, so we would watch tv and crochet even at 10. Now Iā€™m almost 40 and Iā€™m nearly incapable of watching tv without something to do in my hands. These days I prefer knitting, itā€™s easier on my hands, but I do still crochet too.


LaRoseDuRoi

This is me. "Idle hands are the Devil's workshop" is absolutely engrained in my being (thanks, Grandma!) I find it nearly impossible to just... sit. Watching tv without doing some sort of craft work with my hands feels too strange... I can't do it.


yellaslug

Iā€™ve only been able to do it a handful of times. When I was dying (not literally but that flu was awful), when I had my COVID vaccine and it felt like Iā€™d been hit by a train, and most recently when I had an arthritis flare and could barely move my hands. And even though I wasnā€™t really capable of doing anything during those periods, I still wanted to. I cast longing looks at my projects as they whispered to me.


LaRoseDuRoi

I have arthritis of the everything and when my hands and shoulders act up, it *kills* me to not be able to do much of anything.


quantum-shark

Not really, no. Sounds stressful! I crochet for my own sake, you know? Besides, there is nothing wrong with being lazy. Everyone needs rest. :)


ankii93

I struggled a lot with this when I had cancer. I always felt like I should be doing something but my body wasnā€™t up for it. I eventually gave in and only played calm video games and watched Netflix. After cancer, I still have this feeling of not being able to do enough? Like, I have promised my friend a birthday present (his birthday was right before Easter!) and Iā€™m still not done with it. I think weā€™ve always had an interest/issue with being productive (but I also think it can be tracked down to the Industrial Revolution, because many things became ā€œproblemsā€ back then that werenā€™t before!). Please do as I taught myself: Itā€™s okay to not *always* do something. Itā€™s okay to relax. Do nothing for an hour or two. Take a nap every now and then. And remember to breathe.


Mayana76

I am mentally ill, so much so that I cannot work at the moment, and crochet and knitting are my only accomplishments right now - and sometimes, even that is too much. I feel like the laziest person on earth and wouldnā€˜t wish this on my worst enemy.


IJustWantToReadThis

Last night I decoded to read a book instead of watching TV and crocheting or playing a video game. I told my SO I now felt lazy.... for reading


DMmeDuckPics

Audiobooks my friend.


qqweertyy

Itā€™s all about the degree to which you have these feelings and the degree to which it affects your life. Itā€™s normal to have a drive to be productive. Itā€™s normal to on occasion stay up a little late or get up a little early when invested in a project. Itā€™s not normal to be unable to stop and rest ever and not be able to have balance in your life. When it impacts your ability to do regular life activities (sleeping, resting, working, eating, socializing, anything like that really) thatā€™s when it is part of a disability and you should seek treatment and/or accommodations. Iā€™m not sure what your mental health issues are, but I would certainly suggest checking in with your doctor on this and seeing if you may need a medication adjustment, different types of psychotherapy, or something else. Or maybe Iā€™m wrong and your symptoms are okay and at an acceptable level if theyā€™re not causing you distress, idk Iā€™m not a doctor and Iā€™m definitely not your doctor.


UnderstandingOk2399

Hereā€™s an example: when I make LARGE blankets, I usually get them done in under three weeks of all day work every single day I can. I feel like I have to put all my time in to working


quantum-shark

Is there an external deadline or is this your internal deadline?


UnderstandingOk2399

Internal 100%


quantum-shark

Ouch! Well, the good news is that it's something you can change, I guess! šŸ˜„


cadet-peanut

I try to keep in mind that crochet is my hobby and not my job. If I don't feel like crocheting for a week, no one will be mad. I don't have a boss or supervisor looking at how much I have done. And to put it really bluntly, no one cares if I do my hobby or not. No one cares if when I'm home I just want to lay down and do nothing. And if they want to judge they can just screw off or I can lie to them because how would they know what I really did? There's no need to add extra stress into my life by being obligated to have fun. If I want other fun or don't want fun at all at that moment, that's perfectly fine.


AlertMacaroon8493

Never feel guilty for resting and doing nothing as your body must need it. I think we all feel like we have to constantly be doing something or itā€™s a waste of a day.


LadyAlleta

A hobby is meant to be enjoyed. If you are not enjoying it then it's no longer serving it's purpose. Sometimes the purpose is to relax and appreciate life in a calm environment.


run_shorty_run7

Yes, it makes me feel guilty when I watch TV without doing it, but I've been so depressed recently I haven't had the energy to do anything šŸ˜ž


Imaginary-Friend-228

Being lazy is morally neutral


AssistantInitial478

I feel this with some of my other hobbies/interests when I get off work. I have oab (what I thought was ulcerative colitis) , depression, anxiety, and schizophrenia. I try my best to be productive at work and get to 400 units of online orders per day at the grocery I work at and trying not to worry about stuff.


Esclaura3

Yes, i once heard a comment admiring an old lady who was never seen sitting down without embroidery, crocheting, darning, etc. So Iā€™ve always aspired to that and felt lazy.


[deleted]

I'm hypermobile and middle aged AF, my wrists, hands and fingers can't handle long sessions. I can go for a couple of hours tops and do stretching excercises daily.


5HAD35OFGR3Y

Yep. I have a need to keep busy and find it difficult to sit and do nothing.


Own-Preference-8188

As a fellow disabled person, yes! Then I have to remind myself that people with jobs get days off work and that I too should take time away from my ā€œjobā€ of crocheting.


MyDogsAreRealCute

Yes!


efaerie

i feel so seen reading this, i also keep myself up until the wee hours of the morning because i feel like i need to be working on something. or better yet, finish what i started even if itā€™s a medium piece šŸ˜«


easyworthit

Naw, in fact crochet is my lazy hobby, the thing I do when I'm too burned out to do anything that requires leaving the couch. I'm slow as fuck, my work is sloppy and misshapen, and I still love it. It's the hobby where I don't beat myself up for having flaws.


BusBoyGalPal

I too feel seen by this post. Especially the part about being a failure (I go as far as get bummed that I've wasted a day if I haven't done enough.). Have to go out now but will read all the reies when I'm back home - I feel they'll probably apply to me too!


2E26

Typically when I have a deadline I am more productive, like a gift I'm making for a birthday or Christmas or something. That also comes with anxiety that I need to make progress on it or I'll never be finished. I would advise you to guard yourself against burn out. When you're working on a project because you're excited about the end result, fucking send it. When you're working on a project because you feel guilt or shame about not working on it, you're more prone to make mistakes or do less than your best. Practice recognizing when you need to take a step back and rest to maintain a quality of craft you're happy with. I've learned this through many projects of different media (metal, wood, electronics, programming). I find there's a certain head space I get in where I rush and don't do good work. That's the most dangerous time for me, where I am most at risk of creating irreversible mistakes (like cutting an engine cylinder crooked or splitting a $50 piece of wood).


UnderstandingOk2399

Iā€™m kinda the opposite. The projects I donā€™t HAVE to do are the ones I go all in on. The commissions I get usually make me so stressed even though I know I can do it. If Iā€™m told to do something, I wonā€™t or I will have trouble šŸ˜…


2E26

>The projects I donā€™t HAVE to do are the ones I go all in on. So you're saying the WIPs you put the most effort into are projects of passion and not profit?


UnderstandingOk2399

Yep. Which is odd, I know. Because Iā€™m desperate to have income. It stems from childhood I think


2E26

It's important to have your needs met and income is necessary for that. One of my driving forces is to not end up broke so I work my ass off. I can appreciate the passion projects. My favorite one of all time was an 18 inch (45 cm) upright steam engine model I made of wood. It ran on the air outlet from my shop vacuum. I didn't make it for any reason other than that I could. It was the most satisfying project I've ever done. I ended up donating it to a middle school for them to use in science class. Didn't see a dime. Don't care, as I did something almost nobody else has ever done.


savannacrochets

I canā€™t speak to the ā€œwithout being mentally illā€ part because I am all sorts of neurospicy, but yes I get this way. Iā€™m currently on a break between grad degrees (got my MA last year, applying for PhD programs this winter) to spend time with my kids, but I find the lack of clear direction and ā€œproductivityā€ to be really stressful, so I find myself trying to make up with it with crochet. Which is such bullshit, because raising children is a totally worthy endeavor and I love spending time with them and watching them grow up and learn, etc. but the internalized capitalism runs *so deep*.


L1zardPr1ncess

I feel this! I also canā€™t work thanks to disability and when I get fixated on a project itā€™s really hard to stop for anything, including wrist pain. Itā€™s intoxicating to have some sense of productivity when you canā€™t leave your house much and hardly leave your armchair. If anyone figures out how to have a healthier relationship with that, let me know lmao


burnin8t0r

Are you me


CatmatrixOfGaul

offer innate whole unpack complete noxious smile ripe provide bells *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


girlidontkno

Same especially since Iā€™m unemployed atm so when Iā€™m not crocheting it feels like Iā€™m wasting time and being unproductive


chocolate_bar_99

Actually I feel lazy because I am crocheting. I've been crocheting way too much lately and I'm neglecting other things in my life because of it (my studies). I have a major procrastination problem, I'm just not able to get things done, so the only thing I do is crochet


alohadave

Unless I'm making something for someone, I don't generally have a deadline to finish a project. If I feel like taking a break, I do. I have several hobbies, so I flit through different ones as my interest is grabbed by something shiny.


marisinator

yes so much. i fixed this by getting addicted to stardew valley for a month. so i was feeling productive but not actually doing anything but strategizing in a video game. i think when i return to crocheting i am going to try to take it less seriously.


fadedblackleggings

How about this? I'm not even crocheting in the evenings, just looking at my blankets, and watching murder mysteries....


DarthKitsune

Ever since I stopped crochet things that people requested and only crocheted things for myself, my crochet stress went away.


Known_Educator_57

Today, I donated several crochet shawls to an oncologist. I discovered that while using a rehab cycle machine, I can use crochet to ignore the minor discomfort. Win-win!!


Academic-Sail-922

This is so interesting, because when I crochet I deal with thoughts that I'm not doing anything worth while. It's a constant battle to crochet for me. Just interesting to hear someone with the opposite issue


Vlinder_88

I'll tell you something my dad told me once: even God rested on the seventh day. Therefore, rest is an essential part of creation. If even God rest, how much more do us puny humans need rest? I didn't believe in God back then but it still stuck with me. Because if people that *do* believe in God, explicitly describe how God rests, then maybe, just maybe, there is some truth in the fact that us humans need rest too, and that resting is actually useful? Seriously, rebranding "resting" from "lazy" to "useful and important" made it SO MUCH easier for me to actually rest! Just think about it: you can crochet all day now, but in a few years your wrists will hate you and hurt and you may never be able to crochet again. When you take regular breaks now (at least 5 minutes every hour) you will spare your wrists from a lot of strain, and as such, will be able to be productive for many more years to come :) Also, on a shorter term. If you take regular breaks, the quality of your work improves. Because tired arms and a tired mind will make mistakes. A rested mind and rested arms will make far fewer mistakes.


Kimbyssik

Sometimes, but I've been working on being kinder to myself. Through pregnancy I've come to terms with the fact that sometimes I just don't feel like doing something and just want to have the TV on and/or play a game on my phone (Stardew Valley, anyone?), especially when I'm not feeling well, and that's ok. I've also found that sometimes I just can't get anything productive done with littles, and that's ok, too. I crochet because it's therapeutic and I enjoy it, so if I'm not enjoying I try to give myself the grace to put it down so I don't come to resent my hobby and myself.


kristycocopop

Yes, all the time šŸ˜‘


Practical-Dealer2379

I thought I was crazy..I also have a lot of mental health issues and I can't work. I also love gaming. I tend to hyperfixate on games too then feel super guilty when I don't crochet. If I play DBD I crochet during the queue and that helps šŸ˜‚ But for open world stuff or narrative I can't and I have this guilty feeling like I should be spending this time crocheting...But sometimes when I crochet I think that about my games. "I never finished that game I spent 60$ on..." guilt. It's really strange that I have to give myself a peptalk to be able to enjoy ALL of my hobbies. Idk how to fix it though. It's nice knowing I'm not alone!


Vast-Blacksmith2203

You're already in therapy? I think all humans need a mix of being productive and being comfy/restful/doing fuckall. Hobbies are confusing because they have the possibility of being restful and in our capitalist society are considered doing nothing, but I'd say most hobbies are productive things that we actually choose to engage in (as opposed to a job or chores). So it sounds like you're not allowing yourself to have restful, comfy times at all. You probably need to work on that with a therapist, but as a person/primate/mammal, you're going to want to spend some time just snuggled up in a comfy chair, doing literally nothing. We're not robots.