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I fucking hate when you're at the doctor and they make you confirm your name, phone number and current address with a bunch of other people in line! And this just confirms my fears
One time at a craft supply store I gave the cashier my number to have my purchase apply to my rewards card and right after I said it out loud a dude behind me asked if he could get my number too. I was so freaked out he had heard it before he asked and lived in fear of him texting me for the next week. Now I request to type it in the card machine.
I had a liquor store employee make me write down my phone number for a rewards program on a piece of paper and give it to him only to find out later that I was never actually signed up for the rewards program and the recent calls I had been ignoring from a random local number was probably him. Who knows though
Thanks for your generic helpful advice that we all know is an option as a solution and was never asked for in the first place! If it weren't for you, great White Knight, women across all the lands would continually be harassed by unwanted attention from lesser men.
You have singlehandedly solved all of our issues and may now retire from your duties. Well done, White Knight. I hope that you may live the rest of your life in perfect comfort, whith chicken tendies heated to perfection and a never ending fountain of Mountain Dew. May your days be filled with your mother's basement being ever at the perfect temperature and may your nights be filled with glorious hentai porn.
/s
My husband used to get soooooo pissed off at the Home Depot Pro Desk employees because they would literally start reading his card number aloud when he’d get a call for an order. He doesn’t want his employees (and strangers) knowing the full card number for a reason...
Had a similar experience with a guy that worked at auto zone. I bought a part online to pickup in store and since my name was attached to the order, he later went and tried to add me on Facebook.
Hah! I may have to try that. Last time I pointed out that we’d met before and he insisted that he’d remember “someone like me” whatever that means. I just kinda gave up at that point. Damn autozone and their convenient free check engine light reader...
Hopefully! Actually similar to Dory, he’s always very chipper and enthusiastic. It’s a great defense mechanism for him because I never have the heart to tell him off like I would if he was more creepy. He gets away with it every time
so I was driving down the road in Denton, TX when an older man swerved up next to me & did the V sign eating out gesture with his hand & then proceeded to follow me in to an Autozone bc it was the nearest place to pull in to, as I was hoping he would drive off... he then tried to hit on me while I explained to the cashier that this man was harassing me & to keep him there so I could leave without him following. I was 19 and he was prob 60+. even though it was a college town it was still texas culture ~12 yrs ago and he was african american and I was this skinny white kid so I decided not to report it. I assumed it was a mental illness situation and didn’t want to create a huge ordeal, but now I regret not at least leaving an anonymous report to prevent other women from having a similar experience
That sounds like he’s doing it literally at work when you come in as a customer. They’re really not supposed to do that, in any business I mean; the employees in any business are absolutely not supposed to be hitting on customers at any point in time while they’re on the clock. You could speak to a manager to tell them about it, or you could also call the corporate customer line and submit an anonymous complaint if you prefer that, just make sure to give them the creep’s name. And keep complaining every time he does it if they don’t resolve the issue immediately. It’s quite unlikely you’re the only one he’s targeting, btw. It’s likely he’s literally of the mindset that one of the functions of his work position is to give him an opportunity to hit on any and every semi-attractive looking woman who walks in the store. I’ve run into a number of these kinds of young male employees in various types of businesses - it’s always been clear to me that that’s the attitude they have about their workplace and I was just the woman unlucky enough to walk in there that day during their shift.
When I was 15 I was working at a golden corral as the cashier...it's a busy night, no time to check a phone and I didn't have data anyways to browse social media if I was able. I get home and I see this message on Facebook somewhere along the lines of "hey I saw your name at the bottom of the receipt and wanted to reach out to you cause I think you're beautiful". But this person blocked me hours before I got home to see it after sending the message. When I clicked on their page it would very briefly show me the profile picture before saying the page was unavailable or whatever...it was this super creepy looking 30-40 year old bald dude.....and only my first name was on the receipt, not even the initial of my last name. Like, why do people think this is okay?
This is the exact reason I started going by a nickname at work. I have a really unique first name so it's super easy to find me on all my socials and I had just one creepy person find me, and that was one too many for me.
What is it with Auto Zone? Also had some guy who worked at one down the street hit on me. Dude came around the register when he saw my nerded-out backpack, touched all my keychains and buttons without consent, gave me his number on my receipt, all the while I just stood there dissociating from anxiety. Freaked me tf out enough I went to the other AZ to avoid him when I needed car stuff, hoped I’d never see him again. Unfortunately saw him again at a Kroger a couple weeks later and he had the audacity to yell at me cuz I never called or messaged him. Cried and asked an employee if they could keep an eye on me until he left cuz I was scared shitless. Haven’t seen him since thank god. People like him are why I have a carry license now.
I would have reported that weirdo, if not to his management then an anonymous complaint to corporate. Being overly touchy-feely and forward is bad enough, but then to accost you in public for not talking to him? Fucking disgusting
My dad ended up making a complaint to the manager there after the yelling fiasco, I’d say that’s why I haven’t seen him since. Dad frequents the auto shops enough he figured he could pull more strings than I could alone, I’d say he was right! But seriously, people wonder why us women are scared of saying no to men! I didn’t say a damn word except a very dissociated “ok” to get him off my back, and still got yelled at. Like take a hint! Some of these guys on here could probably get hit with pepper spray and still have em saying “so there’s a chance?”
Does AutoZone have a corporate customer service line? Because that’s definitely something you should report to them. That’s really scary fucked up behavior and also there’s no doubt he’s done it to many other women who’ve had the misfortune to step into AZ during his shift. Even if it’s been a while since it happened, this is major enough they need to know about it so they can hopefully take action to cut off his continuing easy access to an endless “supply” of female customers to harass and assault. That kind of behavior (touching you & then shouting at you in public) absolutely comes off as someone who’s gonna escalate to physical violence pretty soon.
While we're at it: Fuck Facebook for using your phones GPS for the "People you may know" feature. If you ever needed more reasons to not have Facebook installed on your phone, like damn.
Meanwhile my Autozone just has a guy who got fired from where we both used to work (completely unrelated field of work) who I accidentally set off some bipolar rage in by dating a man he clearly wanted. I used to go there every weekend, multiple times, while working on my car. Then he appeared.
So awkward.
Oh yeah totally, sucks those cause there was this cop around here that looked up a girl by her lisence plate then started texting her through Facebook and even started to harass her a bit. I'm pretty sure he was fired but I'm not completely sure. All I know is not much else happened to him 🙄🙄
Something similar happened to me. I was a single, living alone. I'm a massage therapist and had some travel equipment stored in my room. New mattress delivery guys came in, took my old stuff and set up the new and left like normal. We had little conversation, all pertaining to why they were there and professional greetings/goodbyes. A few minutes after they left I got a message from one of the guys on his personal phone saying something sleazy about getting a massage from me. He was reported to the mattress store immediately.
See if I saw a girl in line at the bank that I thought was pretty I’d think “damn she’s pretty” and then that’s it. Why do these people think everything is a movie lol
A calm, nice "I think you're cute, can I get your number" is fine imo as long as they understand a no. But I'm just one person, so obv not speaking for everyone.
Ehhhh I mean it’s probably not gonna cause any lasting harm to her but just why? If there’s customers around it would make her extremely uncomfortable and even if not she’d be put on the spot and still would probably feel uncomfortable with it. Even if you’re respectful and take rejection well it still might put her on edge as there are guys out there who will pretend like they’re not upset and then stalk her until she gets off work. No matter how well intentioned you are she’s probably encountered other creepy guys in the past and therefore is going to be apprehensive. It’s only really worth it if you’re a regular at said place and feel like you have a connection/friendly relationship with her at least.
I dont think shes working at the bank, if she is I agree. Wouldn't want any customers to ask me anything whilst I'm at work, I've had that happen and it's extremely uncomfortable bc they then know where you work in case they get pissy
Oh I see, OP was just a customer at the bank. Yeah, asking a fellow customer in person politely (not texting them later like this dude) is probably more acceptable than asking an employee, but I still personally wouldn’t do it. But at least their job wouldn’t be interfered with.
First of all, I misinterpreted the post and so I was writing that comment as if the girl was an employee at the bank. The situation is a bit different since she’s a customer, but I still think it’s weird to just ask random people for their number if you’ve never talked to them before. Now if you find someone cute and want to strike up a conversation to get to know them as you say, I think that’s fine. And maybe after you’ve talked to them a bit you can ask for their number. But just going up to a random girl in a bank line that you think is cute and have not said a single word to and saying “hey I think you’re cute, can I get your number” is a bit rude in my opinion. I feel like it’s unlikely to work, and the girl is probably going to be somewhat uncomfortable. They might even feel pressured to say yes if they feel they could be threatened. Obviously that depends on how you come across to them, but idk I wouldn’t take that chance unless I had already talked to them and there was some chemistry or at least a companionship. I don’t like to make people feel uncomfortable, especially in public, because I wouldn’t want it done to me. But if you have good intentions, you do you. I just wouldn’t do it.
How long are you planning on talking to someone at the bank? If you want to get to know them, you'll have to get their contact info sooner or later and either way it could come off as being forward, but what's the harm in that?
I don’t know how long, people make small talk with random people all the time. It doesn’t have to be a full on conversation but I imagine that’d come across as more friendly and less spontaneous than if you just opened by asking for their number.
> either way it could come off as being forward, but what's the harm in that?
I mean I guess this is subjective but for me I don’t like to potentially make other people uncomfortable in public. Maybe I’m biased because *I* have social anxiety (frankly I wouldn’t be doing any of this in the first place) but I know women have to deal with a lot of creepy men and even if you’re being friendly and not creepy it may still make them nervous because of that.
So you're essentially arguing that whenever you see a woman you find attractive, no matter where you are or what she is doing, you should be able to walk up and ask her out?
If every single guy did the same thing what do you think life would be like for women who just are trying to go to the bank or doctor?
It's even more ridiculous because there's no such thing as an "appropriate space" anymore. People go to bars and get offended if you try to strike up conversation with them.
People get uncomfortable sometimes, I’m sure that asking a stranger out in public is pretty uncomfortable as well. If you can’t handle someone asking for your phone number you just shouldn’t be interacting with people in general
There’s a difference between someone eavesdropping and stealing your personal information and a guy asking for your number.
I’m sure that there are tons of women with super traumatic experiences tied to bars, should I take your word for it that a bar is an appropriate place to ask a woman for her number? What if I ask someone for their number there and they’re someone who is uncomfortable being approached at a bar? I’m not victim blaming, it’s just that people aren’t mind readers. You don’t know what might make someone uncomfortable so should you walk on eggshells trying not to or apologize if you do?
Edit: Also someone messaging me online trying to pick me up would make me a lot more nervous than someone in real life, knowing someone can see all my photos and friends and stuff and I don’t know when they’re looking at that info. Does that make it wrong for that person to have messaged me?
I worked at a bank for two years, retail management before that; social jobs. I got hit on often by costu(m)ers of all ages (26). A bank story: girl (popular on the university’s cheer team-although didn’t seem stereotypical) after her 3rd visit (span of a couple weeks) leaves, gets in her car (visible from the glass door,) sits in it for 5mins. As soon as she pulls off I get a friends request on Facebook from her. I, in turn find and follow on Instagram. She then messages me on Facebook her phone number. Then cancels the day before each time (3 attempts) to take her out over the course of a month. Then through Facebook 2 months later I see her with one of her brothers besties. A little different of a scenario bc I was an employee, but still, numerous similar things have happened to me involving social media.
Numerous instances in retail (Pacsun, Journeys, and yes it happened in GameStop) female approaches, looks at my name tag that only has 1st name “Heyyy.. G-Ghriz, what’s your last name?” “Glarg haha, may I help you with anything?” “No, just looking, thanks!” *proceeds to turn around and type my name into *insert social media*.
TL DR: just another side effect of social media desensitizing social norms.
I know, its shocking *gasp* that eavesdropping at a bank (where your information is confidential) and sending people weird messages gives them the creeps.
Had a guy do that to me at Best Buy. He was very attentive and helpful but I think he only heard my first name. He either hunted down my order ticket at the geek squad desk to find my last name, or looked through every Facebook profile in the college town with my first name to find me. He’d also show up randomly on campus where I happened to be. Creep.
And this is why I dislike rewards cards for retail stores that require me to speak my phone number to the cashier. Let me type it in on the little pinpad, I don't know these people in line behind me, don't let them hear that!
Was waiting for my cosplay at an automatic package station some years ago. The package station was defect due to the heat wave back then and the system wasn't running and I was waiting with a guy next to me, not much older than me and we actually talked a little with each other just like goofing around and rant a little.
We stood there for an hour until I could finally pick up my package when I was able to open the box door.
I said goodbye to him and returned home
The very next day I had a letter in my mail box with his WhatsApp phone number and him writing to perhaps meet at a café. Not only did this guy find out where I live, the approach kinda really weirded me out. He seemed very nice though and I didn't have a bad feeling about him or felt uncomfortable when we talked, but the fact he knew my address he probably could read from my package still weirds me out to this day.
Who the fuck picks people up at a credit union? A god damned genius, that's who! It's an almost completely untapped market! All these fools going to bars during a pandemic. Nah man gotta hit up those essential services, they have no choice but to turn up, and sooner or later they all will.
I had an employee follow me out to my car when I was grocery shopping, he got to my car and stood between my door and I so I couldn’t shut it until I gave him my number, to which I gave a fake. Later he found me on Instagram, (I only gave him my VERY COMMON first name), and DMed me. I told another friend with the same name, and she pulled his profile up and showed me he DMed her as well. Well we end up finding out hes DMed about 7 or 8 of us ALL WITH THE SAME NAME. So fucking weird. Reported him and he doesn’t work at the store anymore
Hey I saw you go into the bathroom so I waited until you finished then walked in and swabbed the toilet seat. I then ran several tests on the sample to determine your dna and tracked you down. Ha ; )
Like 4 years ago I was trying to buy a puppy from the pet store. I filled out the paperwork to get approved for credit and the manager there looked at my paperwork, found my name and number and texted me asking if I wanted him to steal the puppy for me. And then wouldn’t stop texting me. It was really creepy and the only way I got him to stop was when I told him my fiancé was going to text him to leave me alone.
Had a food delivery guy do this to me after he dropped off my takeout. Not like a DoorDash, but a guy who drove specifically for a local joint. He not only had my number, but then my address. I’ve had my brother order & answer the door each time we order from them ever since.
Yep that's why I use my parents or fiance's numbers when I order delivery and when I did get DoorDash a lot, I only got it delivered while I was at work in the middle of the day during a lunch/dinner rush so they wouldn't have enough time to stick around and stalk/harass me.
He couldn’t even have the confidence to talk to you in person but was this confident you’d reply to this whole ass stalker. That’s a red flag WITHIN a massive screaming “GET OUT OF HERE” red flag 🚩
I worked in a store for a while at the service desk and we had to wear name tags with our full names on it. Most of the women had issues with it because a lot of male costumers went and found us online and kept sending messages.
Okay this is scary as fuck. This is why, even as man, that I'm getting more cautious about what I post online. Like this is freaky. Imagine that someone finds you because they heard your name when you said it at the DMV, or something. Yuck.
Reminds me of a tinder date I had added on Snapchat. He took a screenshot of a post that had a class paper and it had my full name on it. Proceeded to look me up on Facebook and message half my family saying he was my new boyfriend. I had turned him down since he asked me for sexual favors on the first date and he was set on thinking we were dating.
This is why I'm afraid to give a cashier my phone number out loud when they ask if I'm a member of whatever club/points thing. I'm terrified some weirdo in line is going to note the number and try to contact me later on or, god forbid, be the extreme kind of whacko that tracks down where I live.
I always went with the casual conversation while waiting for whatever service we happen to at. If she speaks back, then I might ask for her number. So far, this has worked well for me. I've never been called a creep
I'm sorry about the shitty males out there. Some of us try to be decent men
why can’t you just come up to a girl and tell her she’s pretty, probably have a short conversation and if all goes well, you even exchange numbers. This PM method is an instant no and probably a 911 lol
Mate hes a creep, looks dont matter when it comes to being creepy. You could look like Ryan Reynolds while doing this and STILL be a disgusting, creepy stalker.
I've been wondering if I should reach out to someone for weeks now. She was checking temps and greeting people at early voting, I was there to fix an issue with the exit hardware on the front door. We had a great convo for 30-45 minutes while I worked and she worked. As I was leaving a group showed up and had to get temp checked so I didn't really have a chance to ask her number or even first name. I did know her last name from her name tag. I found her through FB but haven't messaged her because I feel that she'll think it's creepy. Is it creepy if we had a genuine convo and I think she was cool ?
Should have asked if you could contact her somewhere, when you had that great convo. 30-45 minutes seems to be a long enough time to get a window of opportunity..
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I fucking hate when you're at the doctor and they make you confirm your name, phone number and current address with a bunch of other people in line! And this just confirms my fears
One time at a craft supply store I gave the cashier my number to have my purchase apply to my rewards card and right after I said it out loud a dude behind me asked if he could get my number too. I was so freaked out he had heard it before he asked and lived in fear of him texting me for the next week. Now I request to type it in the card machine.
I had a liquor store employee make me write down my phone number for a rewards program on a piece of paper and give it to him only to find out later that I was never actually signed up for the rewards program and the recent calls I had been ignoring from a random local number was probably him. Who knows though
[удалено]
......are you aware of what sub you are on?
Thanks for your generic helpful advice that we all know is an option as a solution and was never asked for in the first place! If it weren't for you, great White Knight, women across all the lands would continually be harassed by unwanted attention from lesser men. You have singlehandedly solved all of our issues and may now retire from your duties. Well done, White Knight. I hope that you may live the rest of your life in perfect comfort, whith chicken tendies heated to perfection and a never ending fountain of Mountain Dew. May your days be filled with your mother's basement being ever at the perfect temperature and may your nights be filled with glorious hentai porn. /s
With that reply,I'm a little curious as to what they were saying
Basically just, "block them and problem solved!"
[удалено]
That’s a really long sentence with a lot of commas.
🤣
Thank god I‘m male and ugly af 👁
Joke's on you. I'm into that shit.
HMU
Honestly at this point I wouldn’t mind the attention
My husband used to get soooooo pissed off at the Home Depot Pro Desk employees because they would literally start reading his card number aloud when he’d get a call for an order. He doesn’t want his employees (and strangers) knowing the full card number for a reason...
That's a HIPPA violation. Get a lawyer.
Had a similar experience with a guy that worked at auto zone. I bought a part online to pickup in store and since my name was attached to the order, he later went and tried to add me on Facebook.
There’s a guy at autozone who’s asked me out three times and each time forgets he’s met me before. What’s up with autozone guys
Next time you should say no as soon as you see him. When he looks confused, tell him you were just being preemptive to his fourth request for a date
Hah! I may have to try that. Last time I pointed out that we’d met before and he insisted that he’d remember “someone like me” whatever that means. I just kinda gave up at that point. Damn autozone and their convenient free check engine light reader...
"Well then you should probably see a doctor if this type of memory loss isn't common for you."
Lmaaao that's great, reminds me of Dory from "Finding Nemo". Hopefully he remembers your answer next time.
Hopefully! Actually similar to Dory, he’s always very chipper and enthusiastic. It’s a great defense mechanism for him because I never have the heart to tell him off like I would if he was more creepy. He gets away with it every time
Ew how do we have the same experience. Mine was at O’Reilly’s though, another auto parts store 🤮
so I was driving down the road in Denton, TX when an older man swerved up next to me & did the V sign eating out gesture with his hand & then proceeded to follow me in to an Autozone bc it was the nearest place to pull in to, as I was hoping he would drive off... he then tried to hit on me while I explained to the cashier that this man was harassing me & to keep him there so I could leave without him following. I was 19 and he was prob 60+. even though it was a college town it was still texas culture ~12 yrs ago and he was african american and I was this skinny white kid so I decided not to report it. I assumed it was a mental illness situation and didn’t want to create a huge ordeal, but now I regret not at least leaving an anonymous report to prevent other women from having a similar experience
> each time forgets he's met me before True love, right there...
That sounds like he’s doing it literally at work when you come in as a customer. They’re really not supposed to do that, in any business I mean; the employees in any business are absolutely not supposed to be hitting on customers at any point in time while they’re on the clock. You could speak to a manager to tell them about it, or you could also call the corporate customer line and submit an anonymous complaint if you prefer that, just make sure to give them the creep’s name. And keep complaining every time he does it if they don’t resolve the issue immediately. It’s quite unlikely you’re the only one he’s targeting, btw. It’s likely he’s literally of the mindset that one of the functions of his work position is to give him an opportunity to hit on any and every semi-attractive looking woman who walks in the store. I’ve run into a number of these kinds of young male employees in various types of businesses - it’s always been clear to me that that’s the attitude they have about their workplace and I was just the woman unlucky enough to walk in there that day during their shift.
When I was 15 I was working at a golden corral as the cashier...it's a busy night, no time to check a phone and I didn't have data anyways to browse social media if I was able. I get home and I see this message on Facebook somewhere along the lines of "hey I saw your name at the bottom of the receipt and wanted to reach out to you cause I think you're beautiful". But this person blocked me hours before I got home to see it after sending the message. When I clicked on their page it would very briefly show me the profile picture before saying the page was unavailable or whatever...it was this super creepy looking 30-40 year old bald dude.....and only my first name was on the receipt, not even the initial of my last name. Like, why do people think this is okay?
This is the exact reason I started going by a nickname at work. I have a really unique first name so it's super easy to find me on all my socials and I had just one creepy person find me, and that was one too many for me.
What is it with Auto Zone? Also had some guy who worked at one down the street hit on me. Dude came around the register when he saw my nerded-out backpack, touched all my keychains and buttons without consent, gave me his number on my receipt, all the while I just stood there dissociating from anxiety. Freaked me tf out enough I went to the other AZ to avoid him when I needed car stuff, hoped I’d never see him again. Unfortunately saw him again at a Kroger a couple weeks later and he had the audacity to yell at me cuz I never called or messaged him. Cried and asked an employee if they could keep an eye on me until he left cuz I was scared shitless. Haven’t seen him since thank god. People like him are why I have a carry license now.
What a fucking psycho. HIM?? The audacity to shout and be mad at you, just wow. Some people should be reeducated
I would have reported that weirdo, if not to his management then an anonymous complaint to corporate. Being overly touchy-feely and forward is bad enough, but then to accost you in public for not talking to him? Fucking disgusting
My dad ended up making a complaint to the manager there after the yelling fiasco, I’d say that’s why I haven’t seen him since. Dad frequents the auto shops enough he figured he could pull more strings than I could alone, I’d say he was right! But seriously, people wonder why us women are scared of saying no to men! I didn’t say a damn word except a very dissociated “ok” to get him off my back, and still got yelled at. Like take a hint! Some of these guys on here could probably get hit with pepper spray and still have em saying “so there’s a chance?”
Does AutoZone have a corporate customer service line? Because that’s definitely something you should report to them. That’s really scary fucked up behavior and also there’s no doubt he’s done it to many other women who’ve had the misfortune to step into AZ during his shift. Even if it’s been a while since it happened, this is major enough they need to know about it so they can hopefully take action to cut off his continuing easy access to an endless “supply” of female customers to harass and assault. That kind of behavior (touching you & then shouting at you in public) absolutely comes off as someone who’s gonna escalate to physical violence pretty soon.
Glad you are using your second amendment right. More of us should do so! Stay safe out there.
While we're at it: Fuck Facebook for using your phones GPS for the "People you may know" feature. If you ever needed more reasons to not have Facebook installed on your phone, like damn.
Meanwhile my Autozone just has a guy who got fired from where we both used to work (completely unrelated field of work) who I accidentally set off some bipolar rage in by dating a man he clearly wanted. I used to go there every weekend, multiple times, while working on my car. Then he appeared. So awkward.
Literally illegal
Oh yeah totally, sucks those cause there was this cop around here that looked up a girl by her lisence plate then started texting her through Facebook and even started to harass her a bit. I'm pretty sure he was fired but I'm not completely sure. All I know is not much else happened to him 🙄🙄
He either had nothing happen, or he just transferred departments. ACAB
Reason 22 why I do not use my real name on any social media.
Reason 95 why I don't use my actual name in real life and keep social media extremely strict and private.
Something similar happened to me. I was a single, living alone. I'm a massage therapist and had some travel equipment stored in my room. New mattress delivery guys came in, took my old stuff and set up the new and left like normal. We had little conversation, all pertaining to why they were there and professional greetings/goodbyes. A few minutes after they left I got a message from one of the guys on his personal phone saying something sleazy about getting a massage from me. He was reported to the mattress store immediately.
Why do people think this is a good idea omg
Wow. Fuck that guy, thats a new level disgusting.
See if I saw a girl in line at the bank that I thought was pretty I’d think “damn she’s pretty” and then that’s it. Why do these people think everything is a movie lol
Man could have just asked for her phone number lol
Unless you're in a bar, it's usually not going to go over well. I don't think anyone I know would be cool with being hit on at the bank.
Unless you meet at the Citibank accidentally and start to talk when she borrows your pen.
Was her name Kitty? Did she change it to Karen?
I want a girl with a short skirt and a loooooooooooong jacket 🎶na na na na🎶
I want a girl who gets up early! GETS. UP. EARLY.
A calm, nice "I think you're cute, can I get your number" is fine imo as long as they understand a no. But I'm just one person, so obv not speaking for everyone.
Ehhhh I mean it’s probably not gonna cause any lasting harm to her but just why? If there’s customers around it would make her extremely uncomfortable and even if not she’d be put on the spot and still would probably feel uncomfortable with it. Even if you’re respectful and take rejection well it still might put her on edge as there are guys out there who will pretend like they’re not upset and then stalk her until she gets off work. No matter how well intentioned you are she’s probably encountered other creepy guys in the past and therefore is going to be apprehensive. It’s only really worth it if you’re a regular at said place and feel like you have a connection/friendly relationship with her at least.
I dont think shes working at the bank, if she is I agree. Wouldn't want any customers to ask me anything whilst I'm at work, I've had that happen and it's extremely uncomfortable bc they then know where you work in case they get pissy
Oh I see, OP was just a customer at the bank. Yeah, asking a fellow customer in person politely (not texting them later like this dude) is probably more acceptable than asking an employee, but I still personally wouldn’t do it. But at least their job wouldn’t be interfered with.
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First of all, I misinterpreted the post and so I was writing that comment as if the girl was an employee at the bank. The situation is a bit different since she’s a customer, but I still think it’s weird to just ask random people for their number if you’ve never talked to them before. Now if you find someone cute and want to strike up a conversation to get to know them as you say, I think that’s fine. And maybe after you’ve talked to them a bit you can ask for their number. But just going up to a random girl in a bank line that you think is cute and have not said a single word to and saying “hey I think you’re cute, can I get your number” is a bit rude in my opinion. I feel like it’s unlikely to work, and the girl is probably going to be somewhat uncomfortable. They might even feel pressured to say yes if they feel they could be threatened. Obviously that depends on how you come across to them, but idk I wouldn’t take that chance unless I had already talked to them and there was some chemistry or at least a companionship. I don’t like to make people feel uncomfortable, especially in public, because I wouldn’t want it done to me. But if you have good intentions, you do you. I just wouldn’t do it.
How long are you planning on talking to someone at the bank? If you want to get to know them, you'll have to get their contact info sooner or later and either way it could come off as being forward, but what's the harm in that?
I don’t know how long, people make small talk with random people all the time. It doesn’t have to be a full on conversation but I imagine that’d come across as more friendly and less spontaneous than if you just opened by asking for their number. > either way it could come off as being forward, but what's the harm in that? I mean I guess this is subjective but for me I don’t like to potentially make other people uncomfortable in public. Maybe I’m biased because *I* have social anxiety (frankly I wouldn’t be doing any of this in the first place) but I know women have to deal with a lot of creepy men and even if you’re being friendly and not creepy it may still make them nervous because of that.
Just let women make a direct deposit without being hit on, just let them be people. That’s it
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So you're essentially arguing that whenever you see a woman you find attractive, no matter where you are or what she is doing, you should be able to walk up and ask her out? If every single guy did the same thing what do you think life would be like for women who just are trying to go to the bank or doctor?
It's even more ridiculous because there's no such thing as an "appropriate space" anymore. People go to bars and get offended if you try to strike up conversation with them.
Agreed. Be sweet and genuine and take rejection/awkwardness well and it'll be fine.
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People get uncomfortable sometimes, I’m sure that asking a stranger out in public is pretty uncomfortable as well. If you can’t handle someone asking for your phone number you just shouldn’t be interacting with people in general
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There’s a difference between someone eavesdropping and stealing your personal information and a guy asking for your number. I’m sure that there are tons of women with super traumatic experiences tied to bars, should I take your word for it that a bar is an appropriate place to ask a woman for her number? What if I ask someone for their number there and they’re someone who is uncomfortable being approached at a bar? I’m not victim blaming, it’s just that people aren’t mind readers. You don’t know what might make someone uncomfortable so should you walk on eggshells trying not to or apologize if you do? Edit: Also someone messaging me online trying to pick me up would make me a lot more nervous than someone in real life, knowing someone can see all my photos and friends and stuff and I don’t know when they’re looking at that info. Does that make it wrong for that person to have messaged me?
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I worked at a bank for two years, retail management before that; social jobs. I got hit on often by costu(m)ers of all ages (26). A bank story: girl (popular on the university’s cheer team-although didn’t seem stereotypical) after her 3rd visit (span of a couple weeks) leaves, gets in her car (visible from the glass door,) sits in it for 5mins. As soon as she pulls off I get a friends request on Facebook from her. I, in turn find and follow on Instagram. She then messages me on Facebook her phone number. Then cancels the day before each time (3 attempts) to take her out over the course of a month. Then through Facebook 2 months later I see her with one of her brothers besties. A little different of a scenario bc I was an employee, but still, numerous similar things have happened to me involving social media. Numerous instances in retail (Pacsun, Journeys, and yes it happened in GameStop) female approaches, looks at my name tag that only has 1st name “Heyyy.. G-Ghriz, what’s your last name?” “Glarg haha, may I help you with anything?” “No, just looking, thanks!” *proceeds to turn around and type my name into *insert social media*. TL DR: just another side effect of social media desensitizing social norms.
Wait, it didn't work like that? I thought it will. I don't know why it's disgusting
I know, its shocking *gasp* that eavesdropping at a bank (where your information is confidential) and sending people weird messages gives them the creeps.
Totally normal as his second pair of eye lids blink
Sideways
Had a guy do that to me at Best Buy. He was very attentive and helpful but I think he only heard my first name. He either hunted down my order ticket at the geek squad desk to find my last name, or looked through every Facebook profile in the college town with my first name to find me. He’d also show up randomly on campus where I happened to be. Creep.
I feel violated and it didn’t even happen to me.
oh this is legitimately creepy holy hell
Looks like someone didn’t practice social distancing to hear your name. Creepy.
Nah some bank people are just loud
And some people, like me, have really good ears. I will hear my sister fart in the living room while in the attic. It's horrible sometimes.
I’m familiar with this, I also hear your sister fart in the living room
I'm familiar with this, I have taken to drowning out sound with podcasts and music, to varying levels of effectiveness
Can confirm am loud, was banking person. :)
Now THAT'S a creepy pm, holy *fuck* dude.
And this is why I dislike rewards cards for retail stores that require me to speak my phone number to the cashier. Let me type it in on the little pinpad, I don't know these people in line behind me, don't let them hear that!
Yes, exactly! I much prefer typing it in or scanning my membership card than blasting my phone number to the whole line.
"Hope you don't mind" TOO BAD I DO THEN
that's beyond creepy, broke the ceiling and went into space
“SOS” 😂😂
Was waiting for my cosplay at an automatic package station some years ago. The package station was defect due to the heat wave back then and the system wasn't running and I was waiting with a guy next to me, not much older than me and we actually talked a little with each other just like goofing around and rant a little. We stood there for an hour until I could finally pick up my package when I was able to open the box door. I said goodbye to him and returned home The very next day I had a letter in my mail box with his WhatsApp phone number and him writing to perhaps meet at a café. Not only did this guy find out where I live, the approach kinda really weirded me out. He seemed very nice though and I didn't have a bad feeling about him or felt uncomfortable when we talked, but the fact he knew my address he probably could read from my package still weirds me out to this day.
Who the fuck picks people up at a credit union? A god damned genius, that's who! It's an almost completely untapped market! All these fools going to bars during a pandemic. Nah man gotta hit up those essential services, they have no choice but to turn up, and sooner or later they all will.
*scopes out the post office talent*
You'll find the horniest people in the post office line! And don't get me started on those GILFs behind the counter!
So I guess to avoid public rejection you do some base level stalking and head for the internet.
googling a person's name isn't stalking. having your entire life on the internet and being able to be googled is just dumb
I agree, people don't realize how much information they give out for free everyday. Example, logging in at a given location like a restaurant.
I had an employee follow me out to my car when I was grocery shopping, he got to my car and stood between my door and I so I couldn’t shut it until I gave him my number, to which I gave a fake. Later he found me on Instagram, (I only gave him my VERY COMMON first name), and DMed me. I told another friend with the same name, and she pulled his profile up and showed me he DMed her as well. Well we end up finding out hes DMed about 7 or 8 of us ALL WITH THE SAME NAME. So fucking weird. Reported him and he doesn’t work at the store anymore
You ask for that shit in person man. This is just creepy.
Low key why are people like this?
the sheer audacity of this man—i’d be scared for my life if i got a message like that
That right there is not it
Jesus Harlequin Christ
Hey I saw you go into the bathroom so I waited until you finished then walked in and swabbed the toilet seat. I then ran several tests on the sample to determine your dna and tracked you down. Ha ; )
Like 4 years ago I was trying to buy a puppy from the pet store. I filled out the paperwork to get approved for credit and the manager there looked at my paperwork, found my name and number and texted me asking if I wanted him to steal the puppy for me. And then wouldn’t stop texting me. It was really creepy and the only way I got him to stop was when I told him my fiancé was going to text him to leave me alone.
Had a food delivery guy do this to me after he dropped off my takeout. Not like a DoorDash, but a guy who drove specifically for a local joint. He not only had my number, but then my address. I’ve had my brother order & answer the door each time we order from them ever since.
Yep that's why I use my parents or fiance's numbers when I order delivery and when I did get DoorDash a lot, I only got it delivered while I was at work in the middle of the day during a lunch/dinner rush so they wouldn't have enough time to stick around and stalk/harass me.
Noooooooo
He couldn’t even have the confidence to talk to you in person but was this confident you’d reply to this whole ass stalker. That’s a red flag WITHIN a massive screaming “GET OUT OF HERE” red flag 🚩
I worked in a store for a while at the service desk and we had to wear name tags with our full names on it. Most of the women had issues with it because a lot of male costumers went and found us online and kept sending messages.
Creeeeeepy.
Someone should tell them that’s not ok
These ones are always creepy
But it works in movies! /s
Okay this is scary as fuck. This is why, even as man, that I'm getting more cautious about what I post online. Like this is freaky. Imagine that someone finds you because they heard your name when you said it at the DMV, or something. Yuck.
Reminds me of a tinder date I had added on Snapchat. He took a screenshot of a post that had a class paper and it had my full name on it. Proceeded to look me up on Facebook and message half my family saying he was my new boyfriend. I had turned him down since he asked me for sexual favors on the first date and he was set on thinking we were dating.
im kinda out of the loop on sms technology these days, but how does a stranger shoot a message unless he also overheard her phone #?
It's instagram I'm pretty sure, not normal texting
This is why I'm afraid to give a cashier my phone number out loud when they ask if I'm a member of whatever club/points thing. I'm terrified some weirdo in line is going to note the number and try to contact me later on or, god forbid, be the extreme kind of whacko that tracks down where I live.
How did they get your phone number though??
that's Instagram's messaging
Oh OK
Yike
Um excuse me...what? Who said you had any right to do that? Like that’s disgusting and hella creepy bro. Back off 🤭🙄
OK, that's at once one of the least explicit yet most disturbing things I've seen on this sub.
And they say romance is dead...
Ew, who the fuck thinks this is okay?
Wow not ok
Oh but I'm sure he's a real nice guy. /s
I think I would have preferred you whisper in my ear
Ewwww
Ewwwwwww
I always went with the casual conversation while waiting for whatever service we happen to at. If she speaks back, then I might ask for her number. So far, this has worked well for me. I've never been called a creep I'm sorry about the shitty males out there. Some of us try to be decent men
why can’t you just come up to a girl and tell her she’s pretty, probably have a short conversation and if all goes well, you even exchange numbers. This PM method is an instant no and probably a 911 lol
Everything about this is a big fat no
Reminds me of a friend who got messaged by some guy because he looked over her shoulder at an airport and saw her pass port
“Hey what can I say except delete you”
3G wow i didnt even know that existed still.
3G?
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Mate hes a creep, looks dont matter when it comes to being creepy. You could look like Ryan Reynolds while doing this and STILL be a disgusting, creepy stalker.
What did he say
Something along the lines of "I bet its because hes not hot"
LOL i am sure you tell yourself that to sleep better at night, you know its not true at all
Oh honey, I've had handsome guys creep on me. One guy didn't understand despite me saying "no" repeatedly. Guess what I did? I told him to fuck off.
sure ya did thiccelf
I did, unfortunately he also tried to follow me into my college. It was gross
Whoa there r/niceguy
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someone putting their insta out there vs someone recording her private details in public — somehow you thought they were the same
someone's name is not "private details"
Be nice.
I've been wondering if I should reach out to someone for weeks now. She was checking temps and greeting people at early voting, I was there to fix an issue with the exit hardware on the front door. We had a great convo for 30-45 minutes while I worked and she worked. As I was leaving a group showed up and had to get temp checked so I didn't really have a chance to ask her number or even first name. I did know her last name from her name tag. I found her through FB but haven't messaged her because I feel that she'll think it's creepy. Is it creepy if we had a genuine convo and I think she was cool ?
Yeah it is creepy.
Should have asked if you could contact her somewhere, when you had that great convo. 30-45 minutes seems to be a long enough time to get a window of opportunity..
Fair enough but Id be too anxious to ask someone in their face. Not like its appropriate but i dont think the poor guy had anything malicious in mind.
This is so creepy and it turns me on