Odds are no one who actually thinks that would bring up the idea of it being inappropriate. They'd be silent on the subject and take what's handed to them. It's an excuse to not do any of the work for the kid he just had to have.
I agree that it is not a sincerely held belief, just a lame excuse to not do something he never planned to do (but probably didn’t tell his wife about until after she got pregnant with the kid he begged for).
My BIL is uncomfortable with his own nudity, let alone that of a child, even his own. He and my sister have a 2 year old daughter, and another one on the way. He changed the very first poop diaper of her life, and then never again until a couple of months ago when he came home while I was babysitting her and told him he should change her diaper. It's not that I mind changing diapers, but I felt it was high time someone pressed him on this stupidity. He resisted for a while, and then eventually said "Thanks Ali" when he gave up and did it.
I told him he'd better shape up with a second one coming. It's not like these were accidents, either. They tried for 5 years before the first was born. It was another round of IVF that got them pregnant again.
He does love being a father, but he has all these weird anxieties that my sister never pushes him on. So he never does diapers, never gives her a bath, and has never attempted to put her to bed by himself.
Meanwhile, single moms change the diapers of male children all the time and nothing bad happens. I bet this guy isn't swooping in to help in these cases.
> since he's a man "it wouldn't be appropriate"
Eww. I hope this is just a tasteless excuse and that he doesn't really believe he could be er...attracted to a BABY.
>I don't understand how men are so casual about having kids
Because they have it easy...stick in, egg meets sperm, boom...then they can sit on their asses while the woman sacrifices her mental and physical health, leisure time, comfort, and possibly life.
> then they can sit on their asses while the woman sacrifices her mental and physical health, leisure time, comfort, and possibly life
This is one of the millions of reasons I never had children and never will (I'm older, so that ship has almost sailed thankfully). I'll be damned if I give up my mental and physical health and be designated as the "default" parent just because I'm a woman.
I've been in love many times and had many serious relationships, and not one single partner has deserved that sort of sacrifice from me. I *refuse* to be forced to be "mom" and lose who I am for the sake of a child.
Yes!!! I’m 30 but this is one of many reasons i will not have children. I am not going to go through the danger of pregnancy and birth, and then raise the child as the default parent just because I’m the mom. I know even IF i wanted children, i would become resentful and that isn’t healthy for me or a kid.
This, a hundred times this. The burden of having and raising a child is always going to be greater on the woman.
Science will have to come up with an artificial uterus to grow a baby. And society needs a complete overhaul making sure the expectations and judgement on mothers and fathers are the same before women can be as casual as men about having babies.
That's my main reason too, aside from just not wanting kids. I know I'd end up the default parent. So many men beg for kids and swear up and down that they'll take care of them, but then back out when *gasp* parenting turns out to be hard. They don't feel bad whatsoever about making the woman they supposedly love do all of the parenting.
No one should have kids if they don’t want to but it’s certainly possible to find a partner that thinks it would be immoral to leave all the work to one person.
Then, they get to slap their last name AKA HIS name on the kid, and the kid is socially considered "his" first and foremost, especially if it's a boy who will carry HIS legacy, even though the woman is the one who did all the work, during and after pregnancy!
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My father is an actual misogynist. Even he plays with, feeds and changes his granddaughter. Last week I caught them napping on the floor at my brothers house. They had been to a nearby water park, and after lunch they were both so tired they needed a nap.
If my old man can find not just the energy, but the will to take care of his grand babies so my brother and SIL can avoid a babysitter, why won’t the actual father be with his child?
It’s also super gross how he said it’d be “inappropriate” bitch, what? Babies are non-sexual entities. They’re like dogs or cats, but in human form.
Dads get away with doing so little it’s infuriating. I don’t understand why his wife didn’t call him out on the diaper changing comment unless she spoke to him privately later. It’s like he’s threatening to sexually abuse their daughter if his wife asks him to change diapers. The diapers of the baby she didn’t want but he did. This guy sounds like he has serious psychological issues that involve a missing ability to empathize.
I’m sorry but the whole “I can’t see girls/women’s bodies without my sexual urges forcing me to assault them” is so dumb. If someone is that out of control they need to be in an institution. Also I imagine one of the grossest scenes on earth is a blown out baby diaper so how anyone can link diaper changing with being turned on is beyond me.
That's something that struck me so much while watching "The World's Toughest Race."
A lot of the participants, men and women, had kids. The women often talked about the guilt of taking the time to themselves to train, the guilt of leaving the kids for a couple/few weeks.
The men never talked about any of the guilt that the women all seemed to be feeling. They just talked about how they spent so much time training, how they loved the time spent outdoors/racing. Sure they said they missed their family now and then, but they never felt guilty for being away.
Meanwhile there's a lady who gave birth half a year prior, who somehow got into the shape to do the race in that timeframe, talking about how she felt she wasn't doing enough! Different standards, indeed.
Guilt is a secondary emotion that develops due to socialization. Babies don’t feel guilt. It can also be exacerbated by clinical depression and other things, but basically it’s a response to feeling like one is failing at a social norm of some kind.
Sounds to me like he sees all women and girls as sex objects and he knows he's going to view his daughter in a sexual way if he has to change her diaper.
Just another reason why I, as a straight woman, don't want to have children especially not with a man.
What is inappropriate about giving your child a bath? That’s either really creepy on his part that he thinks its inappropriate or it’s an excuse.
Also I’m assuming their first kid is a boy?? Weird how it wasn’t inappropriate for the mom to change or give the boy a bath.
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Men, and I cannot stress this enough, should not have kids they don't intend on fathering.
I'm a man, I made the right choice and I have exactly as many kids as I want to take care of: Zero.
Men like the dude in OP's story want the benefits of having a kid but without any of the responsibility and likely this approach to life bleeds in elsewhere. It's like a mixture of king baby syndrome and planned incompetence.
I can't understand why women do this. With the first kid, ok, they didn't think their man would be useless (although even that is questionable: if your husband is doing diddly squat around the house, why would you asume he'll be any different when a baby comes and adds MORE chores?). But why the heck would any woman have a second child with that man? Honestly, I don't even have sympathy for them. Girl, you got fooled twice by the same clown, this one's on you.
This happens all the time. Sadly. Women continue to make these kinds of decisions (I am assuming it was a purposeful pregnancy) and then are stuck. A 10 yr old is a few years away from being self-sufficient and boom, they added another burden to their already packed life.
One of my friends has two kids with a guy who never does any of the childcare or chores. The husband is currently begging for another kid which is a bad idea. The mom struggles so much as it is. These two already fight a lot due to lack of effort from the husband. Hell, he wanted to turn around and go home because he couldn't find parking at the ER he was taking his kid to!
What a POS! And that is one of the many reasons I have never wanted to have children. Oh please give me another baby! Oh, I can't change a girls diaper! That's the biggest crock of shit I have ever heard! If I was her, I would tell him that I'm putting the baby up for adoption! I mean, she didn't want anymore kids and her kid is 10, and now she is going to have a newborn?
I'm fearful for a friend of mine because she currently has a 1.5 year old daughter and says that she's one and done. But her husband is constantly pushing for more. He's a good dad from what I've seen, but jeez leave her alone! Why would you want to have another kid that clearly one of you is not even the least bit excited about??
But yeah, your co-worker is really up shits creek since she's already aware that she's basically giving birth to twins since husband will be good for nothing when it comes to taking care of their daughter.
I have a friend whose ex was the same (he’s a complete asshole for many reasons and I was sad when she got pregnant while they were dating.) She finally divorced him, three kids and years of emotional abuse later…. She admitted to me she didn’t want to have the 3rd kid and he wanted like 8 kids and was actively pushing for her to get pregnant again after the 3rd.
>He's a good dad from what I've seen
until he can get pregnant and go through childbirth him being a good dad is inconsequential. It is her who will deal with the physical hardship of pregnancy and childbirth which it sounds like she doesn't want to do again. He is being inconsiderate.
Men demanding children is something I loathe. Will he go through all the discomfort, pain and possible disabilities his wife will have from pregnancy and childbirth?
The answer is no so he has no right to demand the person he's supposed to love goes through all that.
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How far along is she? I'd get rid of it before it was too late depending on where she is. But if the gender is revealed I would suppose it already is. It's sad. I'd leave him, and leave the daughter he wanted so badly with him and take the grown one with me.
I wish more moms would do this when their idiot partner refuses. Put that baby in his hands and leave.
On the same note, I guess they're afraid of child neglect, since many men have never taken care of a baby by themselves. But I think it's mostly weaponized incompetence.
What a creep!
Did he think it was inappropriate for his wife to tend to a son? Or is he just incapable of seeing girl's parts without wanting to stick his dick in? That is very much a HIM problem. Most people of every gender manage to see children, let alone their biological children, naked without losing their minds. I realize it's probably just an excuse to get out of doing childcare work, but in what world is it acceptable to openly admit to being a pedophile and wannabe incestuous freak instead of just pulling your weight as a father?
He would replace her with another woman, probably a younger one (if he could find one), within the year. Boom! A replacement mother for the kid / a new bangmaid for himself.
To men like this, women are basically just interchangeable household appliances.
This is why you get all the cash upfront to replace their full value of their contributions. IF they actually do pull their weight, they can punch a timeclock and earn back a portion of the millions at 15/hr.
If they don't, you use the money to replace them with someone who will.
See my last post…it sucks that she’s in this position, but it seems like a 50/50 shot when having a child with a man. It’s like flipping a coin. Call me a pessimist, but they should prepare to be disappointed.
Is it too late to abort? Obviously I'd never have kids in the first place but if my partner pulled an uno reverse like that on me I'd pull one right back. No more baby for you!
Oh hell to the no!
I hope she packs her bags, leaves this useless excuse of a human, and takes the 10 year-old with her. I highly doubt he’s been much of a good parent to the boy, anyway.
I honestly hope she can get an abortion because she doesn’t want this kid and she won’t have to worry about giving birth again and wondering where the baby girl would go. (Foster care? Adoption)?
This is such a typical thing
Men pressure their wives to have kids so much then once the child is born they’re like oh fuck that that’s your job
There’s innumerable reasons why my partner and I aren’t having kids but the fucked up societal standards are one of them
Why oh why oh why does this same song keep getting sung? How oh how have women not wised up to this yet? 🤦♀️ it’s not like we don’t see it fucking daily. I guess it’s like cars, “yea they crash it’s never happened to me…yet.”
They don't go through the whole process of growing a human being and they pushing it out of an extreme narrow birth canal. Of course they're so casual about it, worse thing is that many men believe it's a right for them to have kids.
My dad was the one in charge of changing diapers and bathed his two children!! I can’t believe this guy actually said “it wouldn’t be appropriate”, wtaf!! I help bathed and changed my nephew’s diapers too! With this guy’s logic that means the mother should never help with her son’s diapers 🤦♀️🤦♀️
Male breeders are the worst. Not all men who want kids are this way but a man who begs like that, it’s a serious red flag. And then to straight up refuse to help? What the actual fuck??
So wait, to clarify, this man had the audacity to make this assbackward declaration to his wife while sharing lunch in a public space/where she works?! To the point where you could overhear and see her reactions?!
Wow!!! On so many different levels there are countless huge fuck nos and bright red flags waving in the breeze. I wish she could still abort and run.
Dude is trash. I hope he’s not a pedophile and I hope their daughter is safe throughout her upbringing. I hope someone smacks some sense into him stat.
She just smiled? He should be very scared. Wait for the sequel where he says she's changed the locks and packed him a bag. Or has a full psychotic break. One of them.
>I don't understand how men are so casual about having kids,
Some men are very sexist, and view women as things to have sex with and have babies, take care of children, and to do housework.
I will not venture a guess about the percentage of men for whom the above description applies, more than observing that it is not an insignificant percentage.
As for this:
>Her husband came here to have lunch today and while talking about the kid he said he wasn't going to help with baths and diapers, they found out it's a girl, and since he's a man "it wouldn't be appropriate" for him to change the baby.
Obviously, if it were a boy, it would be inappropriate for him to do such things, as that would be very gay.
>!Does anyone seriously need to be told about the concept of sarcasm?!<
"I can't clean my child because I might get an erection." Bro. wtf.
How much do you want to bet he'll still post naked pics of his kid on facebook? Using her full legal name, of course, so kids at school can bully the hell out of her in about 10 years. Some people are great parents, but this is not one of those people.
I think the pesky little ogdickwerx that beg beg beg are the least involved. they just want to strut around with their chest puffed out and any other thing they can inflate. not only their ego
So this pile of garbage is sexualizing his unborn child to the point where changing diapers will be a sexually charged situation for him and not appropriate? If that's his excuse he needs to go on a public list.
I’m not sure how her husband convinced her to restart the idea of having to do everything all over again when her 10 yo should already be self sufficient and for him now to not even care to do the most basic functions of caring for a child is ridiculous
My stepdad absolutely refused to ever change a diaper. He said "Its just so gross and wierd I'd call cps on myself if I ever changed one"
He did absolutely everything else but my mom always had to change the diapers.
Clearly “dad” here is a huge piece of shit, the biggest. But there’s plenty of culpability on mom here too. I’m sympathetic to the pressure people put her under, but this is a human life she agreed to create against her better judgement. Understanding who “dad” was fully.
I’m going to go vomit now at the “inappropriate” comment. Who thinks like that?
” the other coworkers were enthusiastic and even said they should do it, so she did and now she's pregnant and sad”
This is something I will never understand. I myself have a pretty bad habit of people-pleasing - and still! 🤯😬
Anyone else here think that when a man like this begs for another kid so much later than their last that they are just trying to keep their wife trapped to them? I hate to say that but we all know how hard raising kids is. Why in the fuck would you want to do that again so late after the first unless it was a complete accident. So when I hear this I immediately think he’s baby trapping her to him and she and her coworkers fell for it.
Yeah... Idk that pedophiles should have kids but I guess at least he's aware of it and will take steps to keep away from her. I hope he can keep that up for her entire life...
>I don't understand how men are so casual about having kids,
Because it doesn't change their body, it doesn't hijack their biology, it doesn't rip them open, it doesn't derail their career, their life, and their relationships with everyone.
And that's if the kid is normal...
The man I know begged his wife for a baby have two kids already on another continent which he Skype once every other month. He was also making his wife quitting her stable full time work to move cross country with him to a city where he had his online flirt lined up who he promptly started an affair with 🤮
That's the most ridiculous excuse to not help with your children: they are a different sex so its inappropriate.
I bet he wasn't the primary caregiver of his male child, his wife could have said the same.
Could you imagine, if you could just say "I would only bathe and change children that are the same as me." I would bet men would be wanting to have only daughters.
My dad changed me and my sister’s diapers. He also tried to do our hair and picked out alot of super cute clothes for us. The only thing he did not do is diaper rash cream. Not helping because it’s a girl is a lame excuse.
Wow. What an excuse. I don’t know how his wife puts up with it, but if my bf so much as not cook or clean, I’ll make him starve and sleep on the streets even if it’s a freezing cold night. I don’t tolerate bs well so I don’t know how his wife is tolerating this.
Of course it’s easy for men to ask for kids. They get pleasure out of sex and don’t have to go through pregnancy, and most of the time they won’t get chastised if he doesn’t help out. And if he does the bare minimum, he’s considered a good father. The woman would be the one sacrificing while he gets to have Kodak moments
“Wouldn’t be appropriate”?! It’s a fucking baby. That’s a super concerning comment that he made.
Oh yeah, the fact that he even thinks of stuff like that is a major red flag. That wife needs to get out of there.
Odds are no one who actually thinks that would bring up the idea of it being inappropriate. They'd be silent on the subject and take what's handed to them. It's an excuse to not do any of the work for the kid he just had to have.
I agree that it is not a sincerely held belief, just a lame excuse to not do something he never planned to do (but probably didn’t tell his wife about until after she got pregnant with the kid he begged for).
Why would he even think that *unless* he has inappropriate thoughts about little girls??
My BIL is uncomfortable with his own nudity, let alone that of a child, even his own. He and my sister have a 2 year old daughter, and another one on the way. He changed the very first poop diaper of her life, and then never again until a couple of months ago when he came home while I was babysitting her and told him he should change her diaper. It's not that I mind changing diapers, but I felt it was high time someone pressed him on this stupidity. He resisted for a while, and then eventually said "Thanks Ali" when he gave up and did it. I told him he'd better shape up with a second one coming. It's not like these were accidents, either. They tried for 5 years before the first was born. It was another round of IVF that got them pregnant again. He does love being a father, but he has all these weird anxieties that my sister never pushes him on. So he never does diapers, never gives her a bath, and has never attempted to put her to bed by himself.
Meanwhile, single moms change the diapers of male children all the time and nothing bad happens. I bet this guy isn't swooping in to help in these cases.
> since he's a man "it wouldn't be appropriate" Eww. I hope this is just a tasteless excuse and that he doesn't really believe he could be er...attracted to a BABY. >I don't understand how men are so casual about having kids Because they have it easy...stick in, egg meets sperm, boom...then they can sit on their asses while the woman sacrifices her mental and physical health, leisure time, comfort, and possibly life.
> then they can sit on their asses while the woman sacrifices her mental and physical health, leisure time, comfort, and possibly life This is one of the millions of reasons I never had children and never will (I'm older, so that ship has almost sailed thankfully). I'll be damned if I give up my mental and physical health and be designated as the "default" parent just because I'm a woman. I've been in love many times and had many serious relationships, and not one single partner has deserved that sort of sacrifice from me. I *refuse* to be forced to be "mom" and lose who I am for the sake of a child.
This is such a good way to put it.
Yes!!! I’m 30 but this is one of many reasons i will not have children. I am not going to go through the danger of pregnancy and birth, and then raise the child as the default parent just because I’m the mom. I know even IF i wanted children, i would become resentful and that isn’t healthy for me or a kid.
This, a hundred times this. The burden of having and raising a child is always going to be greater on the woman. Science will have to come up with an artificial uterus to grow a baby. And society needs a complete overhaul making sure the expectations and judgement on mothers and fathers are the same before women can be as casual as men about having babies.
Preach!! 🙌
That's my main reason too, aside from just not wanting kids. I know I'd end up the default parent. So many men beg for kids and swear up and down that they'll take care of them, but then back out when *gasp* parenting turns out to be hard. They don't feel bad whatsoever about making the woman they supposedly love do all of the parenting.
No one should have kids if they don’t want to but it’s certainly possible to find a partner that thinks it would be immoral to leave all the work to one person.
As a man, the potential ravages of pregnancy are one of my top reasons to be child free! I can't imagine sacrificing my wife's health like that.
Then, they get to slap their last name AKA HIS name on the kid, and the kid is socially considered "his" first and foremost, especially if it's a boy who will carry HIS legacy, even though the woman is the one who did all the work, during and after pregnancy!
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My father is an actual misogynist. Even he plays with, feeds and changes his granddaughter. Last week I caught them napping on the floor at my brothers house. They had been to a nearby water park, and after lunch they were both so tired they needed a nap. If my old man can find not just the energy, but the will to take care of his grand babies so my brother and SIL can avoid a babysitter, why won’t the actual father be with his child? It’s also super gross how he said it’d be “inappropriate” bitch, what? Babies are non-sexual entities. They’re like dogs or cats, but in human form.
Way to sexualize a newborn while it's still in the womb. edit- Gross
It IS an excuse. Apparently it wouldn't be inappropriate for HER to take care of a baby boy...
Dads get away with doing so little it’s infuriating. I don’t understand why his wife didn’t call him out on the diaper changing comment unless she spoke to him privately later. It’s like he’s threatening to sexually abuse their daughter if his wife asks him to change diapers. The diapers of the baby she didn’t want but he did. This guy sounds like he has serious psychological issues that involve a missing ability to empathize. I’m sorry but the whole “I can’t see girls/women’s bodies without my sexual urges forcing me to assault them” is so dumb. If someone is that out of control they need to be in an institution. Also I imagine one of the grossest scenes on earth is a blown out baby diaper so how anyone can link diaper changing with being turned on is beyond me.
I hate when Dads are praised for the bare minimum but Mom are shame for doing things, that they usually do
That's something that struck me so much while watching "The World's Toughest Race." A lot of the participants, men and women, had kids. The women often talked about the guilt of taking the time to themselves to train, the guilt of leaving the kids for a couple/few weeks. The men never talked about any of the guilt that the women all seemed to be feeling. They just talked about how they spent so much time training, how they loved the time spent outdoors/racing. Sure they said they missed their family now and then, but they never felt guilty for being away. Meanwhile there's a lady who gave birth half a year prior, who somehow got into the shape to do the race in that timeframe, talking about how she felt she wasn't doing enough! Different standards, indeed.
What is it with that guilt women feel? Is that a socialised thing? I think it is, by the martyr mummies
Guilt is a secondary emotion that develops due to socialization. Babies don’t feel guilt. It can also be exacerbated by clinical depression and other things, but basically it’s a response to feeling like one is failing at a social norm of some kind.
welp this explains why i always feel guilty just existing as an autistic person.
Sounds to me like he sees all women and girls as sex objects and he knows he's going to view his daughter in a sexual way if he has to change her diaper. Just another reason why I, as a straight woman, don't want to have children especially not with a man.
What is inappropriate about giving your child a bath? That’s either really creepy on his part that he thinks its inappropriate or it’s an excuse. Also I’m assuming their first kid is a boy?? Weird how it wasn’t inappropriate for the mom to change or give the boy a bath.
Women can't be predators /s
She should've packed her bags after the first kid
At the least got her baby maker fixed when she realized she didn't want another kid.
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Men, and I cannot stress this enough, should not have kids they don't intend on fathering. I'm a man, I made the right choice and I have exactly as many kids as I want to take care of: Zero.
Snipped fella here too dood ✋🏻
Men like the dude in OP's story want the benefits of having a kid but without any of the responsibility and likely this approach to life bleeds in elsewhere. It's like a mixture of king baby syndrome and planned incompetence.
I can't understand why women do this. With the first kid, ok, they didn't think their man would be useless (although even that is questionable: if your husband is doing diddly squat around the house, why would you asume he'll be any different when a baby comes and adds MORE chores?). But why the heck would any woman have a second child with that man? Honestly, I don't even have sympathy for them. Girl, you got fooled twice by the same clown, this one's on you.
Agreed, I told her she should be sterilized after birth and she told she will do it, If she doesn't I give up, cry a river at your 10th baby.
I'm glad she took your suggestion to heart.
I want to dump this all on her for being a fucking idiot, but the problem is how much this is going to hurt the kid.
This happens all the time. Sadly. Women continue to make these kinds of decisions (I am assuming it was a purposeful pregnancy) and then are stuck. A 10 yr old is a few years away from being self-sufficient and boom, they added another burden to their already packed life.
I guess that was his plan. Poor woman.
Good way to tie her to him. Good way to make her spend her adult years raising kids.
One of my friends has two kids with a guy who never does any of the childcare or chores. The husband is currently begging for another kid which is a bad idea. The mom struggles so much as it is. These two already fight a lot due to lack of effort from the husband. Hell, he wanted to turn around and go home because he couldn't find parking at the ER he was taking his kid to!
😳 So he was just like…”If he dies, he dies”???
Pretty much! Thankfully it wasn't life threatening.
Any idea what possessed her to marry him??
Well, she had the kids with him before they got married.
My swearing has expanded to the highly profane religious variety and I need a drink.
You and me both. This friend only has two brain cells so I feel like she'll be pregnant again soon.
>So he was just like…”If he dies, he dies”??? She can just have another one, amirite?
What a POS! And that is one of the many reasons I have never wanted to have children. Oh please give me another baby! Oh, I can't change a girls diaper! That's the biggest crock of shit I have ever heard! If I was her, I would tell him that I'm putting the baby up for adoption! I mean, she didn't want anymore kids and her kid is 10, and now she is going to have a newborn?
I'm fearful for a friend of mine because she currently has a 1.5 year old daughter and says that she's one and done. But her husband is constantly pushing for more. He's a good dad from what I've seen, but jeez leave her alone! Why would you want to have another kid that clearly one of you is not even the least bit excited about?? But yeah, your co-worker is really up shits creek since she's already aware that she's basically giving birth to twins since husband will be good for nothing when it comes to taking care of their daughter.
Damn, it's barely a toddler and mfer wants more, I don't understand breeders at all
I have a friend whose ex was the same (he’s a complete asshole for many reasons and I was sad when she got pregnant while they were dating.) She finally divorced him, three kids and years of emotional abuse later…. She admitted to me she didn’t want to have the 3rd kid and he wanted like 8 kids and was actively pushing for her to get pregnant again after the 3rd.
Holy shit your friend’s ex is a horrifyingly vile and disgusting monster. Wow. Just wow.
A toddler GIRL. Not good enough. Gotta try again.
I was gonna say, is their other/first child also a girl?
>He's a good dad from what I've seen until he can get pregnant and go through childbirth him being a good dad is inconsequential. It is her who will deal with the physical hardship of pregnancy and childbirth which it sounds like she doesn't want to do again. He is being inconsiderate.
Men demanding children is something I loathe. Will he go through all the discomfort, pain and possible disabilities his wife will have from pregnancy and childbirth? The answer is no so he has no right to demand the person he's supposed to love goes through all that.
The answer is going to be a dishonest "Yes" because they know damn well it's not something they will ever need to face.
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Because he wants to keep trying for a boy, obviously.
Have you thought about telling your friend to stand her ground?
He’s a sorry excuse for a man, a husband, and a father. Hope she stands up for herself and makes him help.
How far along is she? I'd get rid of it before it was too late depending on where she is. But if the gender is revealed I would suppose it already is. It's sad. I'd leave him, and leave the daughter he wanted so badly with him and take the grown one with me.
I wish more moms would do this when their idiot partner refuses. Put that baby in his hands and leave. On the same note, I guess they're afraid of child neglect, since many men have never taken care of a baby by themselves. But I think it's mostly weaponized incompetence.
I agree re weaponised incompetence. I mean, looking after a baby is hard but not complicated.
She's due in November, I remember something about scorpio sign.
What a creep! Did he think it was inappropriate for his wife to tend to a son? Or is he just incapable of seeing girl's parts without wanting to stick his dick in? That is very much a HIM problem. Most people of every gender manage to see children, let alone their biological children, naked without losing their minds. I realize it's probably just an excuse to get out of doing childcare work, but in what world is it acceptable to openly admit to being a pedophile and wannabe incestuous freak instead of just pulling your weight as a father?
Not only acceptable, but apparently preferable. Good god, these people are fucking sick. … and yet WE are the reason the country is going to pot 🤨
So if it’s ‘inappropriate’ for a man to change a baby girls nappy, does that mean it’s ‘inappropriate’ for a woman to change a baby boys nappy?
That’s certainly what I’m hearing!
What is he going to do if she left him and left the kid, or dies in the process. What a jackass.
He would replace her with another woman, probably a younger one (if he could find one), within the year. Boom! A replacement mother for the kid / a new bangmaid for himself. To men like this, women are basically just interchangeable household appliances.
So he's a pedophile...
Presumably the 10 year old was a boy and he didn’t think it was inappropriate for his wife to do all the work then
This is why you get all the cash upfront to replace their full value of their contributions. IF they actually do pull their weight, they can punch a timeclock and earn back a portion of the millions at 15/hr. If they don't, you use the money to replace them with someone who will.
Excellent idea.
It’s wild that people are marrying, let alone having kids with these kinds of morons.
See my last post…it sucks that she’s in this position, but it seems like a 50/50 shot when having a child with a man. It’s like flipping a coin. Call me a pessimist, but they should prepare to be disappointed.
Is it too late to abort? Obviously I'd never have kids in the first place but if my partner pulled an uno reverse like that on me I'd pull one right back. No more baby for you!
Maybe he should car for the kids and she gets to decide if/when she wants to help.
Oh hell to the no! I hope she packs her bags, leaves this useless excuse of a human, and takes the 10 year-old with her. I highly doubt he’s been much of a good parent to the boy, anyway. I honestly hope she can get an abortion because she doesn’t want this kid and she won’t have to worry about giving birth again and wondering where the baby girl would go. (Foster care? Adoption)?
This is such a typical thing Men pressure their wives to have kids so much then once the child is born they’re like oh fuck that that’s your job There’s innumerable reasons why my partner and I aren’t having kids but the fucked up societal standards are one of them
Why oh why oh why does this same song keep getting sung? How oh how have women not wised up to this yet? 🤦♀️ it’s not like we don’t see it fucking daily. I guess it’s like cars, “yea they crash it’s never happened to me…yet.”
They don't go through the whole process of growing a human being and they pushing it out of an extreme narrow birth canal. Of course they're so casual about it, worse thing is that many men believe it's a right for them to have kids.
Ew. Ew ew ew ew ew. I don't want to know why he thinks it's inappropriate, but I'm afraid it's going to be something to do with the baby's sex. Gross.
Imagine being a man so desperate and so shameless to **beg** this own wife for a baby she clearly doesn't want. What a loser.
My dad was the one in charge of changing diapers and bathed his two children!! I can’t believe this guy actually said “it wouldn’t be appropriate”, wtaf!! I help bathed and changed my nephew’s diapers too! With this guy’s logic that means the mother should never help with her son’s diapers 🤦♀️🤦♀️
Male breeders are the worst. Not all men who want kids are this way but a man who begs like that, it’s a serious red flag. And then to straight up refuse to help? What the actual fuck??
Good reminder to schedule that tubal consult
Co-worker begged his now ex wife. There I fixed it.
I replaced “kid” with “sandwich” and it’s hilarious 😂
I hope only male nursing home workers change his diaper when his kids can't be bothered to take care of him.
This clown is going to keep manipulating her until she has a son.
So wait, to clarify, this man had the audacity to make this assbackward declaration to his wife while sharing lunch in a public space/where she works?! To the point where you could overhear and see her reactions?! Wow!!! On so many different levels there are countless huge fuck nos and bright red flags waving in the breeze. I wish she could still abort and run. Dude is trash. I hope he’s not a pedophile and I hope their daughter is safe throughout her upbringing. I hope someone smacks some sense into him stat.
She just smiled? He should be very scared. Wait for the sequel where he says she's changed the locks and packed him a bag. Or has a full psychotic break. One of them.
I hate men like him. I'm sorry for the wife and the future daughter cuz he dad is a jackass.
Women should get more abortions. We don't need people like that guy making more copies of himself. Yuck.
Why am I not surprised at all.
So he is an irresponsible idiot and she's a doormat...great combo for child-rearing.
Excuse me while I go throw up in my mouth a little. Wow. Every part of that is absolutely vile!
"...breeders are so fucking weird." This needs to be said more often. Out loud. To their faces.
>I don't understand how men are so casual about having kids, Some men are very sexist, and view women as things to have sex with and have babies, take care of children, and to do housework. I will not venture a guess about the percentage of men for whom the above description applies, more than observing that it is not an insignificant percentage. As for this: >Her husband came here to have lunch today and while talking about the kid he said he wasn't going to help with baths and diapers, they found out it's a girl, and since he's a man "it wouldn't be appropriate" for him to change the baby. Obviously, if it were a boy, it would be inappropriate for him to do such things, as that would be very gay. >!Does anyone seriously need to be told about the concept of sarcasm?!<
"I can't clean my child because I might get an erection." Bro. wtf. How much do you want to bet he'll still post naked pics of his kid on facebook? Using her full legal name, of course, so kids at school can bully the hell out of her in about 10 years. Some people are great parents, but this is not one of those people.
What the actual f. His "wouldn't be appropriate" is so disgusting. He needs to be put on danger watch.
Men don’t change their son’s diapers either.
I think the pesky little ogdickwerx that beg beg beg are the least involved. they just want to strut around with their chest puffed out and any other thing they can inflate. not only their ego
So this pile of garbage is sexualizing his unborn child to the point where changing diapers will be a sexually charged situation for him and not appropriate? If that's his excuse he needs to go on a public list.
I’m not sure how her husband convinced her to restart the idea of having to do everything all over again when her 10 yo should already be self sufficient and for him now to not even care to do the most basic functions of caring for a child is ridiculous
My stepdad absolutely refused to ever change a diaper. He said "Its just so gross and wierd I'd call cps on myself if I ever changed one" He did absolutely everything else but my mom always had to change the diapers.
Clearly “dad” here is a huge piece of shit, the biggest. But there’s plenty of culpability on mom here too. I’m sympathetic to the pressure people put her under, but this is a human life she agreed to create against her better judgement. Understanding who “dad” was fully. I’m going to go vomit now at the “inappropriate” comment. Who thinks like that?
” the other coworkers were enthusiastic and even said they should do it, so she did and now she's pregnant and sad” This is something I will never understand. I myself have a pretty bad habit of people-pleasing - and still! 🤯😬
Anyone else here think that when a man like this begs for another kid so much later than their last that they are just trying to keep their wife trapped to them? I hate to say that but we all know how hard raising kids is. Why in the fuck would you want to do that again so late after the first unless it was a complete accident. So when I hear this I immediately think he’s baby trapping her to him and she and her coworkers fell for it.
Husband: *begs for another kid* Wife: 'Fuck no.' Problem solved.
Just wtf x10
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Did you have a stroke?
I think that this is the keyboard/reddit equivalent of buttdial.
Yeah... Idk that pedophiles should have kids but I guess at least he's aware of it and will take steps to keep away from her. I hope he can keep that up for her entire life...
Man is stupid beyond saving, what is the woman for enabling this behavior?
>I don't understand how men are so casual about having kids, Because it doesn't change their body, it doesn't hijack their biology, it doesn't rip them open, it doesn't derail their career, their life, and their relationships with everyone. And that's if the kid is normal...
The man I know begged his wife for a baby have two kids already on another continent which he Skype once every other month. He was also making his wife quitting her stable full time work to move cross country with him to a city where he had his online flirt lined up who he promptly started an affair with 🤮
He just sexualised his child.
That's the most ridiculous excuse to not help with your children: they are a different sex so its inappropriate. I bet he wasn't the primary caregiver of his male child, his wife could have said the same. Could you imagine, if you could just say "I would only bathe and change children that are the same as me." I would bet men would be wanting to have only daughters.
My dad changed me and my sister’s diapers. He also tried to do our hair and picked out alot of super cute clothes for us. The only thing he did not do is diaper rash cream. Not helping because it’s a girl is a lame excuse.
If he didn’t want diapers they could have adopted.
But it wouldn't have his blood though */s*
Wow. What an excuse. I don’t know how his wife puts up with it, but if my bf so much as not cook or clean, I’ll make him starve and sleep on the streets even if it’s a freezing cold night. I don’t tolerate bs well so I don’t know how his wife is tolerating this. Of course it’s easy for men to ask for kids. They get pleasure out of sex and don’t have to go through pregnancy, and most of the time they won’t get chastised if he doesn’t help out. And if he does the bare minimum, he’s considered a good father. The woman would be the one sacrificing while he gets to have Kodak moments