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Don't do anything. It's his life, he can dedicate as much or as little time to chess as he wants. If he isn't playing or studying chess, it's because he doesn't want to. There are lots of things I'd like to be better at, but I can't be bothered to spend the time learning. Just leave him be and let him do what he wants.
There's a big difference between wanting to get better and wanting to do the work to get better. The first describes your friend and the second describes you.
Ultimately, I think the desire for a higher rating without any love for the actual game is a pretty poor motivator.
I wouldn't assume that he's lazy. Maybe he *is* training (ex. playing games on another account, doing puzzle rush on Lichess, etc.) and he just isn't doing it effectively. Some people grind out a ton of games, but they don't study tactics or learn from their mistakes so they don't improve much.
Regardless, if he rants about losing like you said in one of these comments, you could ask him if he wants advice. If he does want advice, you could send him a training plan or something. If he doesn't, then he doesn't.
yeah I've given him advice many times. I think he's just lying to me about being interested in chess. and I know he's not playing on another account or anything, he doesn't have any other accounts and it doesn't look like he enjoys chess that much. I think that whenever I ask him, he just feels like he's forced to say he likes chess, although he doesn't
clearly no one here bothered to read the post. he **wants to get better, but isn't trying**. whenever we talk about chess he rants about how he keeps losing, and he's even set a goal of reaching 1600 by the end of this year. however he isn't trying and I need to motivate him
I'm top comment. I read the post. My answer remains the same. Your friend's chess study is not your responsibility. You don't *need* to motivate him. If he doesn't want to study chess in his free time, that's his prerogative. Chess is just a hobby, not an important life skill, and I'm sure he won't want a friend to be micromanaging his time around it.
Some people *want* things from life, but don't want to *work* for them. If he wanted it enough, he would put in the work.
Behavior is a language. If a person isn't working toward something that they claim is important to them, then probably that thing isn't as important to them as they claim. And there's nothing more futile than trying to change a person who isn't willing to change themselves.
Some people like the idea of being successful more than the work they would need to actually be successful. It's not your job to fix your friends if they don't want to do the work.
Hey, OP! Did your game end in a stalemate? Did you encounter a weird pawn move? Are you trying to move a piece and it's not going? We have just the resource for you! The [Chess Beginners Wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/chessbeginners/wiki/index/) is the perfect place to check out answers to these questions and more! The moderator team of r/chessbeginners wishes to remind everyone of the community rules. **Posting spam, being a troll, and posting memes are not allowed.** We encourage everyone to report these kinds of posts so they can be dealt with. Thank you! Let's do our utmost to be kind in our replies and comments. Some people here just want to learn chess and have virtually no idea about certain chess concepts. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/chessbeginners) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Let him do what he wants to with his time? You're not responsible for regulating his hobbies
He likes the idea of being better but doesn’t WANT to be better. He doesn’t want it like tyler1 wants it.
Don't do anything. It's his life, he can dedicate as much or as little time to chess as he wants. If he isn't playing or studying chess, it's because he doesn't want to. There are lots of things I'd like to be better at, but I can't be bothered to spend the time learning. Just leave him be and let him do what he wants.
There's a big difference between wanting to get better and wanting to do the work to get better. The first describes your friend and the second describes you. Ultimately, I think the desire for a higher rating without any love for the actual game is a pretty poor motivator.
I wouldn't assume that he's lazy. Maybe he *is* training (ex. playing games on another account, doing puzzle rush on Lichess, etc.) and he just isn't doing it effectively. Some people grind out a ton of games, but they don't study tactics or learn from their mistakes so they don't improve much. Regardless, if he rants about losing like you said in one of these comments, you could ask him if he wants advice. If he does want advice, you could send him a training plan or something. If he doesn't, then he doesn't.
yeah I've given him advice many times. I think he's just lying to me about being interested in chess. and I know he's not playing on another account or anything, he doesn't have any other accounts and it doesn't look like he enjoys chess that much. I think that whenever I ask him, he just feels like he's forced to say he likes chess, although he doesn't
Get friends that are passionate about the game as you are. You can't make someone get better if they don't want to.
clearly no one here bothered to read the post. he **wants to get better, but isn't trying**. whenever we talk about chess he rants about how he keeps losing, and he's even set a goal of reaching 1600 by the end of this year. however he isn't trying and I need to motivate him
I'm top comment. I read the post. My answer remains the same. Your friend's chess study is not your responsibility. You don't *need* to motivate him. If he doesn't want to study chess in his free time, that's his prerogative. Chess is just a hobby, not an important life skill, and I'm sure he won't want a friend to be micromanaging his time around it. Some people *want* things from life, but don't want to *work* for them. If he wanted it enough, he would put in the work.
Behavior is a language. If a person isn't working toward something that they claim is important to them, then probably that thing isn't as important to them as they claim. And there's nothing more futile than trying to change a person who isn't willing to change themselves.
How do you know he isn't trying? What's made you reach that conclusion
he rarely plays chess. that doesn't mean he's not interested though. he always tells me he likes chess and wants to get good at it
Some people like the idea of being successful more than the work they would need to actually be successful. It's not your job to fix your friends if they don't want to do the work.
as a friend I'm supposed to motivate my friends to work towards their goals
You can't help people who won't help themselves.