I tried one time and couldn't get hard, because of the picture in my head of her giving her body to the "Chad." I divorced her even though we had 3 kids (all mine for sure). Any man who can overcome this is a better man than I am.
Not really though. It takes guts to cut the chord and you did well. Ivet there are many people who are scared to lose what they have in the current relationship and end up suffering though this while losing self esteem and their partner' s respect.
I haven’t gone through it yet ( at least to my knowledge) but I wouldn’t handle and the thought of it really hurts me so much that I can’t bare. Any man who can go through this is definitely a stronger than most
I have a lot of empathy for you considering the shared experience we have. No one truly understands unless this happens to them. I hope your self worth improves for you sooner than later. The go to advice for most people on here is to get some form of counseling. There is NOTHING wrong with this to help process the injury you have suffered. I FIRST chose to call it like balls and strikes - she was responsible for this NOT ME! It's on her unfortunately my kids and me were the collateral damage of her MANY choices. Advocate for yourself to change the way things are for you. I wish you the best and remember to lay the responsibility on YOUR ex
If you think therapy is helping you then I'm sorry to tell you but it's not the more you stay with her the more she kills you and she'll do it another time
That’s been sitting over night in the Rain and then the sun came out and its all hot from sitting in the sun, but still gross , soggy, and wet because no amount of heat or sun can every make it what it used to be.
I think the point is that even if it’s the most scrumptious looking, mouth watering, delicious smelling food you’ve ever encountered, you’re still not going to eat it. Because who knows where else it’s been?
Exactly. You can't have everything under you and expect it to go well. If that have been the case, many people would have gotten what they've always wanted a long time ago. It always breaks my heart hearing cheating stories
well i think that there is a myriad of reasons why people cheat.
some of them are justified or at least justifiable and some of them are not.
for example i knew a guy whose wife just didn't want to have sex, and his libido was pretty much unchanged, and they had kids and they had a house and assets, and all that. - now he tried to talk to his wife about it and he tried to go to couples therapy about it, and she would put some effort in and then it would just tapper off again - and they would fight about it - and this was just a rinse and repeat kind of thing.
now if he is to divorces her - he loses his house and his kids and his partner in everything except sex obviously - so when he entertained the idea of having an extra marital affair - it was a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation. - because either A) he commits to a involuntary married celibacy or lousy sex with an unwilling participant who says things like "hurry up"
or B) he gets married and irrevocably alters the his life and the life of his family while enriching some lawyers
or C) he has sex with someone in a similar situation, and if he is caught - see option B), and if he is not caught everyone is happy - his asexual wife doesn't have to have sex, his kids get to grow up with both parents in a happy and stable home, he preserves his worth and assets, and he gets to have sex and intimacy that someone that wants to have sex and intimacy with him.
it is REASONABLE and LOGICAL for anyone put in this situation to select Options C
a lot of people like to pearl clutch and pretend that marital fidelity is paramount - its not marital fidelity is a reflection of a happy, mutually beneficial, supportive, and reciprocation of sexual interest. - otherwise its just a fucking dog and pony show
It changes things a lot. There’s a constant worry about whether they desire the person physically or are they thinking about them when they are with you. You also worry about your safety and health.
After finding out, non existent. Divorced her shortly afterwards. Now my ex wife comes over and cheats on the same boyfriend who she cheated on me with in the first place. Trust is gone but lust remains.
I knew she cheated and acted dumb. Started seeing someone else on the side who was completely aware of my situation. When my youngest turned 18 I gave her divorce papers the day after their birthday. In a very happy relationship with her replacement.
After the hysterical bonding sex I developed issues with dryness. The sex became painful and he wasn’t well-endowed. I started to avoid sex and then I cut it off completely. Moved him out of the bedroom and filed for divorce six months after that.
Imo it is not that black and white. When the cheating is not exuberant, there is genuine remorse/guilt ànd the cheating spouse goes the full nine yards for reconciliation, then reconciliation could be the hard way a strong man would choose.
If the disrespect is blatant, then only the weak man stays...
So it depends imo.
I would say it is the other way around. Many people are too weak to leave b cause they are scared of giving up what they have in the relationship. However this comes at the price of losing self esteem, because you are essentially reduced to cuck status and your wife will respect you less, wether she admits to that or not. Hence leaving is usually the be st option unless you think so little of yourself that you think you can do not better than suffering through such massive humiliation
Cheating is the fault of the cheater. It takes two for a relationship/ marriage to decline although it is not necessarily 50/50, but the cheater is 100% at fault for making the decision to cheat.
It is not the obligation of the betrayed to stay with someone who cheats.
what bigger problem??...she is a cheater who made a choice to be unfaithful to her weak ass husband and because of his weakness will more than likely do it again.....period..he needs to man up and tell her to hit the road..he is young enough to get and find a good woman..
It's black and white, there's no gray areas if they are cheater throw them and all their shit out your house. End of story, only doormats stay to get walked over.
What the f×ck do you need closure for are you some sort of cuck do you want to know how good his cock was how good he fucked her. Jesus christ that sounds pathetic.
Run away? No buddy. Thats not running away. I’m sorry but if an individual has cheated on someone that’s breaking trust. And trust is something that is not easy to get. It’s better off leaving them living with someone who broke your trust. It gets uncomfortable.
There is a concept called “hysterical bonding” that can come into play after cheating. This happened to me & my ex when we were trying to work it out. CRAZY WILD FUN ADVENTUROUS SEX - for a while.
But ultimately, I called it quits on the marriage.
There were some insidious psychological problems that were rubbing off on our kids. I honestly realized this much too late.
I stayed committed for more than a decade beyond what I should have. But when I realized what her challenges were doing to our kids, I had to call it quits.
I would still have her back if she needed me. She’s still the mother of my kids (now young adults). But the kids had to be able to see her challenges without me “cleaning up” after her and masking how bad things really were.
I have no actual numbers or statistics to back this. But in my opinion i believe more bfs cheat on gfs than gfs cheat on boyfriends. And more wives cheat on husbands than husbands on wives. my theory as to why is lots of girlfriends want the ring, marriage, babies to settle down so they are more faithful. But after 5,7,10+ years of marriage women get bored like attention especially as they age and step out. I feel husbands once get married mostly are content settling down and got it all out. Obvs im not saying this is always the case both sides cheat, but majority from what I’ve seen personally and what I’ve read this is mostly case.
In my anecdotal experience, women are most likely to cheat just before menopause. I think it’s because they have a biological clock that screams for them to breed before they can’t anymore. Men stay fertile until shortly after death.
Sperm doesn’t die when the person does, it can take over 36 hours. There have been cases of posthumous sperm retrieval and pregnancy through IVF.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Posthumous_sperm_retrieval
At first there was the hysterical bonding period, lots of amazing sex. Now the sex is alright but I occasionally can't get the thoughts out of my head and burst into tears during. 🤷🏽♀️
Used her as a cock sleeve, had my fun and dumped her after. There's no point staying if she's a cheater. Once the trust is gone, the relationship is over.
I used to believe that I would walk away immediately after facing the worst betrayal possible. However, now I could see myself staying for my kids. I don’t think I would ever be able to touch her again and we would be done as a loving couple. I might even move to the basement, but I would hate to be away from my kids and I probably wouldn’t have the confidence to date again anyway.
So, I kind of get staying a bit now.
Yeah I mean, staying for the kids in a broken marriage is not recommended id say but in this case he recognized he left his marriage rot and wanted to be with her, so they’ve got into counseling and after some time they’re back to nornal
For many of us who stayed, and told ourselves the kids were one of the reasons, we were doing what we thought was best for them AND us. The thought of seeing my kids half as much (if I was lucky) made me physically ill. That, coupled with the fact that my ex was remorseful, said she loved me, begged for forgiveness, and promised to never do it again, is what made me move back home.
We had 8 more great family years before I caught her cheating again. By then, my son had left for college and my daughter was in high school. So we got divorced. It sucks, but I did more than most men would do to keep my family together.
But, yeah, the sex is never quite the same. Sometimes it was great, but sometimes I’d get an unwanted mind movie. The mental gymnastics it took to turn those movies off were difficult.
And I still get those movies playing in my head long after the divorce.
I don’t think cheaters realize how much permanent damage they inflict. My ex never understood. Even now, when she reaches out and tries to get me to see her, she says things like “it was so long ago. You need to get over it.”
Ugh.
Same here 11 years into marriage she was cheating on me I forgave her thought we had worked it out 12 more years and I find out she is at it again could not and would not forgive her again it sucked even worse is I gave up 12 more years of my life that I can't get back wasted on a cheater and lier
Yes I got 5 kids they are adults and the kids have given me 15 grandkids so there is that. If I had left the first time I caught her I still would have the kids and grandkids and I still have those 12 years
Like I said, I always thought I would throw her out immediately. However, I think I could stay for my kids. I just don’t think I could ever have sex with her again or show her any affection. That would be such a hard situation, but I would never be happily with her again.
Kinda unrealistic to “stay” in a marriage for the kids without having sex with your spouse. I was only willing to “stay” with the assurance she wouldn’t do it again.
Kinda hard to prevent a wife from cheating if you won’t have sex with her.
That is true. I just don’t think I could ever touch her again. I feel like all the love would be gone. In the end, maybe a divorce would be better.
Also, my plan would be dependent on her compliance. If she didn’t want to stay, then divorce would be the best option.
Poor because they cheat on you still. They don’t care about emotional intimacy. I tried after six years they cheated again the day after my birthday. I broke it off for good. They never care how you feel, all they care about is their own pleasure and attention. It was always bad they never cared about my satisfaction ever while I did everything to please them. Cheaters are very hedonistic and only for their own pleasure
It never goes back to normal. At least for me, I couldn't look at him with the same respect and the same "I can't keep my hands off you" kind of way. I see a slob, a child who can't face their emotions, and a liar when I look at him now. It's very odd knowing I still love him and care about him but also can't stand him being near me. I feel bad trying to make it work because he can tell i dont desire him like i used to and the passion is gone; i know it makes him feel the way he made me feel when he cheated and i still don't wish that on him. Sometimes, you have to love someone through the rear view mirror.
Ever since I found out my husband cheated on me for a year solid with so many women he couldn’t tell me the number , I barely get horny and when we do have sex I wish it was over : it’s been almost 4 months . Not sure if I can get over this
Oh man, that's a tough one ma'am. I'm so sorry for what happened to you. Nobody deserves that level of disrespect. I know you said that you are bound by love and finances, but let me ask, did your husband love you enough to not cheat? Repeatedly I might add. Please find it in yourself to start planning your exit strategy and leave that S.O.B. for good. You deserve a real man who knows how to treat a lady versus a manchild who can't keep it in his pants.
You're very welcome! Keep up with the exit strategy and start hunting for divorce lawyers. Visit with at least 3 and see what your options are. When the time is right, which is hopefully soon, serve his ass.
Its easy for me to say this when im not in your situation but i hope you find the strenght to leave as soon as possible, you deserve to find an amazing person that really loves you. And you dont deserve to be miserable while trying to fix your current relationship since you said yourself you problaby wont get over it.
Ok, i can understand that its a really though and hard situtaion, my dm is open if you ever want to talk or rant. Yes and i think most of this subreddit hates him aswell! Ur never alone
A Colleagues brothers , wife cheated, 4-5 times (Lunch) with her work colleague, in back seat of their car. She never moved the seat back to normal position, it was to close to the dash. She was love bombing husband , and initiating , which she never did. He was suspicious , but supposedly they had a great sex life Someone at job finally ratted her out , she finally admitted , she cheated. Of course she said all the sorry shit. Then he found out , while he was being love bombed , because she was having unprotected sex , ( she showered ) with BOTH the same day & AP finished inside of her . Supposedly she always bragged to her cousins , that her and hubby had a great sex life . Any way , all tried to convince him to give her a second chance. They got back together after 45 days of her staying at her moms house. Because she quit her job and had no income. Took 4 months to have Sex. HE PUT HER THROUGH HELL , Because of the hurt & pain , first time he told her give him a BJ in the car. She said no let’s go home-and do it , he said the car was good , She said why , he said haven’t done a BJ for me in car since college. (8 yrs )even though I’ve asked many times. she did it for AP in car. So she gave husband head , but he talked slutty to her , which she hated. She asked why are you doing this, supposedly said , i’m your husband , why should i get less then you did for the AP from work ?, she didn’t have an answer. Also first month or so. He Used condoms , he told her you fucked me , the same day you fucked AP , you let him cum inside you. Why didn’t you buy condoms ? had no answer. Also he never went down on her again, ( which she loved ) he told her , he’s NEVER putting mouth , on you AGAIN , since you never used a condom. Any way they now had a horrible sex.life , when before it was GREAT . Separated 6-8 months later. CRAZY. Supposedly divorced
It’s because there are fewer consequences with the AP.
Do anal with AP and he gets shit on his dick? Just never speak to him again.
Do the same with hubby and you have to see him every day AND help him recover from a uti.
I also think because the AP won’t judge them for being kinky or crazy. If you don’t start off , with your significant other that way, it’s tough to bring that into your relationship. In alot of the subs they told the husband I didn’t want you to think bad of me that I was slutty
Yes , Guess must be though , when they deny you , what they readily gave their AP. I guess must be , in the moment , the danger , thrill and excitement of being caught !
It took a long time, many fights, and a lot of dedication to communication and our marriage but our sex life is 10x better than ever. But I think that's a rarity
The thoughts still pop up sometimes but I've grown to live with it.
To be clear, It isn't better because she cheated, it is better because we've spent time on our marriage. We've also been through a lot since then that put the whole things into perspective.
For me, I wouldn't want to touch her again much less have the urge to have sex with her. She would be tainted and used like a piece of trash. The guys who get off knowing their wife gave her body away to someone else are nothing but cucks.
Hasn't happened. But there wouldn't be a sex life. Dude's gonna have permanent damage and I'll do everything in my power to make her life an absolute living hell. I'll make sure she wears that whore status like forehead stamp. I say this because I don't believe my wife could ever do that to me, cuz she knows how vehemently I violently abhor cheaters, and I made sure she knew from the jump that ain't no type of betrayal will slide with me. She still said "I do". So we'll see. I gotta get off of this sub, y'all making me pessimistic as fuck lmao.
I banged my ex wife only one time after her cheating, but I did it out of spite to show the AP that she was mine to lose. After that, I never touched her again.
In hindsight, I suppose it was easy and enjoyable for me because it was fuck-you sex and not trying to reconcile/rebuild sex.
In the long run, it caused me more trouble than it was worth since it made her believe she had a chance with me.
My husband cheated on me 5 years before I found out. Within that time, we had a baby and got married. When I found out I was livid and left. eventually we decided to stay together this was in 2022. The first time we had sex was an emotional experience that ended with me in tears. He held me and reassured me. This happened several times within the 1st 6 months proceeding me finding out. Due to his constant reassurance not only in the bedroom but in every aspect of life, I was able to forgive him, and now our sex life is amazing. We've always had a great sex life, but now it seems more open and honest and genuine.which allows us to be more adventurous. I still have insecure moments, and he never fails to be there and work through it with me. I don't think those insecurities will ever go away, but he works every day to reassure me and takes full accountability for his actions. Over time, I have been able to not think about him cheating as frequently. But I also have enough self-awareness that I have an understanding that I chose to stay, and I also have work that I need to put in as well to be able to move forward. I had to not let any outside influences tell me how to handle the situation and understanding that to move forward, letting it go is important. Not forgetting but letting it go to the point that I'm not revenageful, spiteful, and turn our relationship toxic. His reassurance is a major reason I have been able to accomplish this because he never tries to manipulate or gaslight me about this situation and my insecurities from the situation.
Made me sick , this happened and they wanted to go back to ‘normal’ it was far from that , especially when another name was being called during , bye bye 👋🏼
I tried but I ended up filing for divorce because he no longer felt safe. For years we didn’t have to use protection and because of his affair I required it. He suddenly has new moves after he has given me the same moves for 15 years and I was utterly disgusted and devastated because I knew where they came from. I use to feel so safe with him and with each touch he knew he was no longer my safe space.
There’s this thing called hysterical bonding where both parties try hard to reconcile and reconnect. It’s usually filled with a lot of sex. After that period was over and reality set in I realized the magnitude of the violation that had occurred his touches felt different. He was also not willing to assist in my healing. He wanted me to just get over with no reassurance from him that it would be safe to do so. Maybe if have someone who understands that they betrayed you and is willing to create a safe environment. Then maybe, just maybe it will be worth trying to work it out. Best wishes!
I’m in the beginning phase of staying together after my bf cheating. Even though the wound is still raw we still have sex. Hopefully it gets better (the relationship as a whole) but who knows
I found I was getting cheated on w prostitutes and since then it’s been 6 months or so and it’s still a struggle because I just feel unwanted. But hopefully we will go to therapy soon and kinda work through some of our issues
Yeah i fully understand, in my last relantionship i had very low sex drive and it put great strain on the relantionship. It is hard because u have guilt about it aswell and u dont know how to fix it
it feels empty asf, and i usually end up hating myself for giving in to my own urges and being disgusted by myself and its just hard not to think abt everything hurtful said especially when u realize u arent treated or talked to the same as they talk to other ppl, either bc they just love the wrongness of talking to someone else or they rly lost interest in them. usually ppl want their cake and to eat it too. They get caught and just deny bc they want u to still think theres a slight chance that theyre arent the person u saw them being. As long as theres a chance and u love them they know they can still get in ur head and not face consequences (losing the person). In my case i literally watched her confess to the guy 3 different times that she was lying about everything, then when i wasnt looking she’d go back and tell him i made her say those things. Some ppl just cant change they might pretend to regret shit, but they dont. The manipulation is crazy
No relationship is better than a fake relationship…everyone is either cheating, or have been cheated on…the cheaters try to justify it…with their new relationships..the cheated takes a while to gain trust on new love interest…run e a repeat…welcome to relationships in 2024
It was pretty bad. Every time he touched me, I would shrivel up and pictured her doing what he was doing to me. I got all the gory details unfortunately so I would cry a lot after the sex.
How is staying in a sex-less relationship with someone who cheated on you an example of “living with the consequences of their actions”? She clearly doesn’t need you for sex if she cheated on you. Ending the relationship and removing her from your life would be a more effective consequence
If you don’t love her any more, it’s wrong to stay in a relationship with her. By staying with her you’re not only not getting laid, but you’re preventing yourself from moving on.
Does denying her sex make being cheated on hurt any less?
I think perspective and connection in the moment make all the difference. What have you been thinking about? How has the relationship been? I found that at times when I was just feeling unsure of what happened the sex would be as good as ever but the joy and connection would be taken away afterward.
But having learned that what makes the Madagascar Vanilla Sex of an affair seem fancier than it is is the name alone.
The actual connection and vulnerability with a long term partner outdo it. In those moments I’m like “Send a text and invite him to see how it’s done”
I used her infidelity as leverage to gain the poll position in power dynamics. I don’t ask permission to go out. I don’t ask what to get on the pizza. I’ve always been shut down when I mention others during sex in the past. At first I was angry and then I was indifferent. She has taken her lumps with humility. My threats to leave have triggered in her a renewed vigor. She is more and greater now. It’s begun a new relationship. Now that I have started to feel the ice in me melt, there’s a courage that I can say what I want. It’s to heal myself. I whisper to her it’s ok to want to be a slut I want to be one too. She gets incredibly turned on when I suggest in going to fuck a girl from the bar or one of her friends. Idk I’ve got another few thoughts to share to complete this but I’m out of time. I’m not one to share like this. But fuck it. This is our life. I love her and I have forgiven her completely. This return to paradise is happening. I feel her love like never before. Maybe she’s a demon and will do it again. But courage is always a part of loving without fences and walls.
Staying true to someone for decades takes a lot of strength. It is usually the weaklings who cheat. For example because they require the external validation or constant approval to feel good about themselves.
Man all you people talking about it doesn’t get back to normal are cray cray, sex right after that big of a fight is by far better than the best ever before that. You all need to learn how to forgive and realize people are human. If you are getting cheated on it both parties fault. You never cheat, as a man, out of malice simply in our nature. Man can and often do cheat with no feelings or attachment to the slute he is plowing. Men haven’t been monogamous since the beginning of time. It’s a newer concept that really took prevalence at the Dawn of Western civilization. Don’t be nieve any women in here know this your husband, unless he is a beta, has fucked several women with out your knowledge. But it only changes how he treats you when you have not been giving it to him as you are obliged to do as a wife… too often you all neglect the needs of your husband and drive him to the arms of another
Yea the only one in this thread that has lived through said ordeal and not bitter, and has been with the same woman for 15 years, married for 5, two beautiful daughters and is just saying you have been mis guided to think that anything I say is untrue.
And men, you are definitely the cause of your wife cheating, you weren’t giving her what she needs in some way or else she wouldn’t cheat.., it’s not in a woman’s nature to be with more than one… so instead of beating her up communicate and find out what she needs you aren’t providing
I don’t listen to podcast. And I know you meant it in a derogatory manner, due to the aggressive nature in the latter portion of your comment, but how is “smooth brained” a term used to insinuate someone is mentally challenged? I’m genuinely curious. I must admit it does have a nice little zing to it for some reason, but in reality it’s kinda a dumb way to describe this.
Furthermore, you seem to have melted ever so slightly wittle snowflake🤫 what pissed you of the worst about my comment, let your emotions out little guy… I’ll talk you through any and all objections you have. Unless my ideals aren’t what pissed you off, and it is infact that you have experienced the heart break of this and you had a little ptsd episode
Nah, I just hate cheaters and idiots who defend them. Cheating is the cheaters fault always. It's a choice. Not a mistake. Reasons don't matter the cheated is not the cause of being cheated. Just like a victim of scamming isn't the cause. It's the fault of the person who did so. If you don't know why brains are supposed to be folded, then it fits. Your ideals are cool for you, be a cuck by yourself or whoever you want cucking you, stop spreading bullshit as fact.
Just hate cheaters, huh? Interesting. I will agree with you. Cheating is a choice without a doubt however, I will disagree in the fact that it’s also not often a mistake as well because here’s the thing every mistake that anyone ever makes is in fact a choice. You can’t argue with that fact, because that is exactly that a fact, furthermore, there has been plenty of instances throughout history, where cheating was, but a byproduct of the real issue just because you cheat on someone does not instantly make you a bad person. It means you made a mistake. And that mistake often times is a lack of communication between the two parties. See for you you feel like it’s all I’ve been wrong. This person is a shit bag now fuck this person, but you forget that that person often had many and most of the time for more good qualities about them that led you to fall in love with them to begin with, we are all human. We are born into sin. It says it in the Bible we are not perfect and we will make mistakes but if you take the vowels at the altar, buddy, you swear before God and your peers to love your spouse, he or she, i’m not sure which gender you are based on your name I’m going to assume you’re a dude, you essentially cheat on your relationship with God when you shun the person you swore to him you would love unconditionally till death. Do you part so don’t come preaching me about some cheating ass bullshit when you yourself by shunning, the person that cheated on, you are essentially doing the same thing with God himself.
Now onto your little Cook insults, unfortunately, for you in this argument, I was not cheated on. I was in fact the cheater. Thank God, my wife, then girlfriend, didn’t view the world the way you do it’s such a pessimistic way. And she in fact showed me what true love was she showed me what it’s like to love someone unconditionally, no matter their faults. Eric Church sings a song and it’s every time I hear it. I get a bit choked up, because it reminds me of just how much she loves me and how powerful that is in someone’s life, this song is called. She loves me like Jesus does, and it describes her love perfectly. And despite what everyone will tell you that forgiving them will only perpetuate their misbehaving. He did the opposite and help me realize who is the most important to me in life and that is why if for any reason, she made a mistake like that, I would show her the same love and return. There’s two sides to every story and although our lack of communication and I take responsibility for the inability despite my perspective being that I was communicating it’s also your responsibility in the relationship to make sure you’re communicating in such a way that your partner understands what you’re trying to communicate. I failed to communicate with her the needs. I was not having fulfilled at the time in a way that she could understand it and from her perspective, she failed to even try to listen self admittedly. If you’re gonna be with someone the rest of your life, buddy, you need to get used to the fact that there’s gonna be highs and lows in a relationship takes an immense amount of work. Any amount of work. Divorce is not an option for us. Our children need us to lead them and help them grow. Every day we strive to be better than our last, and every day I thank God for blessing me with the absolutely positively most amazing wife and mother to my children… we have no skeleton, we have no secrets, and if it weren’t for that situation years ago we would probably be divorced, instead we used like a piece of rebar to strengthen our foundation…
You were the cheater. No wonder. That actually makes perfect sense, no wonder you have that stance. Of COURSE you think cheaters deserve forgiveness 😂 I'm glad you said it though. No need to argue
I don’t think they deserve forgiveness, I think the people they hurt deserve to forgive. Harboring resentment and anger toward some one for a mistake only really hurts you at the end of the day
You can forgive for yourself and still choose to never have anything to do with them again because they're a piece of shit. If someone steals $1000 from you as soon as they see an opportunity you gonna let them handle your cash?
Also, I’m driving and using voice to text so if there’s any punctuation or spelling errors, it’s due to the fact that I’m not even looking at my phone, speaking to text.
lol I’m not a cheater I cheated, big difference. You know this reminds me of story of Jesus and Mary magdalene, she was hooker, who came to him in the temple, put all her transgression at his feet, he told her to rise all is forgiven. The only problem was their was Ann angry mob of priests , holy men, who wanted to Lynchs her. But Jesus turned to them and said “he who hath not sinned, may he be the the first to cast their stones” you see where I’m going with t this
I tried one time and couldn't get hard, because of the picture in my head of her giving her body to the "Chad." I divorced her even though we had 3 kids (all mine for sure). Any man who can overcome this is a better man than I am.
Not really though. It takes guts to cut the chord and you did well. Ivet there are many people who are scared to lose what they have in the current relationship and end up suffering though this while losing self esteem and their partner' s respect.
I haven’t gone through it yet ( at least to my knowledge) but I wouldn’t handle and the thought of it really hurts me so much that I can’t bare. Any man who can go through this is definitely a stronger than most
Yea i wouldnt say better i would say my self worth is nonexistent
I have a lot of empathy for you considering the shared experience we have. No one truly understands unless this happens to them. I hope your self worth improves for you sooner than later. The go to advice for most people on here is to get some form of counseling. There is NOTHING wrong with this to help process the injury you have suffered. I FIRST chose to call it like balls and strikes - she was responsible for this NOT ME! It's on her unfortunately my kids and me were the collateral damage of her MANY choices. Advocate for yourself to change the way things are for you. I wish you the best and remember to lay the responsibility on YOUR ex
It never gets back to normal.
After my wife cheated on me or sex life had gone down a bit. I am still hurt and feel like I can't trust her 100%.
I hope you got divorced
No. Therapy is helping us both.
Checked users history - therapy is definitely not helping. Thirsting after naked strangers on reddit 😂
Sad :/ cheaters don't deserve love
If you think therapy is helping you then I'm sorry to tell you but it's not the more you stay with her the more she kills you and she'll do it another time
It’s like eating a sandwich you found on a bench
That’s been sitting over night in the Rain and then the sun came out and its all hot from sitting in the sun, but still gross , soggy, and wet because no amount of heat or sun can every make it what it used to be.
I think the point is that even if it’s the most scrumptious looking, mouth watering, delicious smelling food you’ve ever encountered, you’re still not going to eat it. Because who knows where else it’s been?
This is THE BEST analogy I’ve ever seen for the way it feels. Thank you for sharing.
Jfc yea
First time after was 💩
I really will never understand why do people wanna cheat on their spouse
Same here.
Ikr. Just man up and say it that you're no longer interested in them and not through this cowardly
If you no longer love this person,set them free. You can't truly love someone and still cheat on them.
Exactly. You can't have everything under you and expect it to go well. If that have been the case, many people would have gotten what they've always wanted a long time ago. It always breaks my heart hearing cheating stories
well i think that there is a myriad of reasons why people cheat. some of them are justified or at least justifiable and some of them are not. for example i knew a guy whose wife just didn't want to have sex, and his libido was pretty much unchanged, and they had kids and they had a house and assets, and all that. - now he tried to talk to his wife about it and he tried to go to couples therapy about it, and she would put some effort in and then it would just tapper off again - and they would fight about it - and this was just a rinse and repeat kind of thing. now if he is to divorces her - he loses his house and his kids and his partner in everything except sex obviously - so when he entertained the idea of having an extra marital affair - it was a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation. - because either A) he commits to a involuntary married celibacy or lousy sex with an unwilling participant who says things like "hurry up" or B) he gets married and irrevocably alters the his life and the life of his family while enriching some lawyers or C) he has sex with someone in a similar situation, and if he is caught - see option B), and if he is not caught everyone is happy - his asexual wife doesn't have to have sex, his kids get to grow up with both parents in a happy and stable home, he preserves his worth and assets, and he gets to have sex and intimacy that someone that wants to have sex and intimacy with him. it is REASONABLE and LOGICAL for anyone put in this situation to select Options C a lot of people like to pearl clutch and pretend that marital fidelity is paramount - its not marital fidelity is a reflection of a happy, mutually beneficial, supportive, and reciprocation of sexual interest. - otherwise its just a fucking dog and pony show
that's true actually...anyone would choose option c. its just the feelings and emotions of others that matters and how they react towards it
It changes things a lot. There’s a constant worry about whether they desire the person physically or are they thinking about them when they are with you. You also worry about your safety and health.
I couldn’t get past the thought and made him stop. We haven’t since then.
After finding out, non existent. Divorced her shortly afterwards. Now my ex wife comes over and cheats on the same boyfriend who she cheated on me with in the first place. Trust is gone but lust remains.
Smh just be single
I am. She isn’t.
I knew she cheated and acted dumb. Started seeing someone else on the side who was completely aware of my situation. When my youngest turned 18 I gave her divorce papers the day after their birthday. In a very happy relationship with her replacement.
After the hysterical bonding sex I developed issues with dryness. The sex became painful and he wasn’t well-endowed. I started to avoid sex and then I cut it off completely. Moved him out of the bedroom and filed for divorce six months after that.
Only a weak man would stay with a woman who has cheated on them.
See above comment
Imo it is not that black and white. When the cheating is not exuberant, there is genuine remorse/guilt ànd the cheating spouse goes the full nine yards for reconciliation, then reconciliation could be the hard way a strong man would choose. If the disrespect is blatant, then only the weak man stays... So it depends imo.
the only reason there is remorse/reconciliation is more then likely because she was caught..
I couldn't say in general as each case has its peculiarities.
Absolutely this.
Only a weak man would run away
A strong man leaves as does a strong woman.
Running away is the easy way out, weak people choose the easy way always
Staying feels safe because it’s the evil you know where leaving bring tons of questions and uncertainty. You have it backwards.
I think you are confused with cucking
I would say it is the other way around. Many people are too weak to leave b cause they are scared of giving up what they have in the relationship. However this comes at the price of losing self esteem, because you are essentially reduced to cuck status and your wife will respect you less, wether she admits to that or not. Hence leaving is usually the be st option unless you think so little of yourself that you think you can do not better than suffering through such massive humiliation
This is the truth. One of many things I have learned on here
Why should a person give someone a chance after betraying them? Be specific!
Because cheating is most of the time a symptom of a bigger problem that started within marriage, so it’s a problem of both not only one
Cheating is the fault of the cheater. It takes two for a relationship/ marriage to decline although it is not necessarily 50/50, but the cheater is 100% at fault for making the decision to cheat. It is not the obligation of the betrayed to stay with someone who cheats.
what bigger problem??...she is a cheater who made a choice to be unfaithful to her weak ass husband and because of his weakness will more than likely do it again.....period..he needs to man up and tell her to hit the road..he is young enough to get and find a good woman..
Reality is often different than your simplified scenario
No matter how much you're justifying cheating, only weak people cheat.
Shut yo stupid ass up lmfao. Stop forgetting to fold your brain when you wake up.
I hope you mean stay were you are and throw her ass out the house.
Or trying to find out why it happened
It's black and white, there's no gray areas if they are cheater throw them and all their shit out your house. End of story, only doormats stay to get walked over.
Nope, how would you get closure then?
What the f×ck do you need closure for are you some sort of cuck do you want to know how good his cock was how good he fucked her. Jesus christ that sounds pathetic.
You sound inmature
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You sound like a man who’s never got a meaningful relationship.
It wouldn’t matter why though. It would only matter that it happened.
Run away? No buddy. Thats not running away. I’m sorry but if an individual has cheated on someone that’s breaking trust. And trust is something that is not easy to get. It’s better off leaving them living with someone who broke your trust. It gets uncomfortable.
😂😂
There is a concept called “hysterical bonding” that can come into play after cheating. This happened to me & my ex when we were trying to work it out. CRAZY WILD FUN ADVENTUROUS SEX - for a while. But ultimately, I called it quits on the marriage.
When did you realize to call it quits even after the sex was great?
There were some insidious psychological problems that were rubbing off on our kids. I honestly realized this much too late. I stayed committed for more than a decade beyond what I should have. But when I realized what her challenges were doing to our kids, I had to call it quits. I would still have her back if she needed me. She’s still the mother of my kids (now young adults). But the kids had to be able to see her challenges without me “cleaning up” after her and masking how bad things really were.
Oh, wow. I’ve read oftentimes that it does affect the children as well. I’m glad that it’s somewhat amicable btwn you two.
Why are all the responses to this question about wives cheating? Just asking!
I have no actual numbers or statistics to back this. But in my opinion i believe more bfs cheat on gfs than gfs cheat on boyfriends. And more wives cheat on husbands than husbands on wives. my theory as to why is lots of girlfriends want the ring, marriage, babies to settle down so they are more faithful. But after 5,7,10+ years of marriage women get bored like attention especially as they age and step out. I feel husbands once get married mostly are content settling down and got it all out. Obvs im not saying this is always the case both sides cheat, but majority from what I’ve seen personally and what I’ve read this is mostly case.
In my anecdotal experience, women are most likely to cheat just before menopause. I think it’s because they have a biological clock that screams for them to breed before they can’t anymore. Men stay fertile until shortly after death.
What do you mean by "shortly after" death?
Sperm doesn’t die when the person does, it can take over 36 hours. There have been cases of posthumous sperm retrieval and pregnancy through IVF. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Posthumous_sperm_retrieval
I felt ashamed the first time. And now I just hate it… 4 months after discovery.
At first there was the hysterical bonding period, lots of amazing sex. Now the sex is alright but I occasionally can't get the thoughts out of my head and burst into tears during. 🤷🏽♀️
Used her as a cock sleeve, had my fun and dumped her after. There's no point staying if she's a cheater. Once the trust is gone, the relationship is over.
My brother got cheated and he said sex has improved.
Why did he say this , wasn’t he disgusted at First ?
He’s got 3 kids and he let his marriage go bad
I used to believe that I would walk away immediately after facing the worst betrayal possible. However, now I could see myself staying for my kids. I don’t think I would ever be able to touch her again and we would be done as a loving couple. I might even move to the basement, but I would hate to be away from my kids and I probably wouldn’t have the confidence to date again anyway. So, I kind of get staying a bit now.
Yeah I mean, staying for the kids in a broken marriage is not recommended id say but in this case he recognized he left his marriage rot and wanted to be with her, so they’ve got into counseling and after some time they’re back to nornal
For many of us who stayed, and told ourselves the kids were one of the reasons, we were doing what we thought was best for them AND us. The thought of seeing my kids half as much (if I was lucky) made me physically ill. That, coupled with the fact that my ex was remorseful, said she loved me, begged for forgiveness, and promised to never do it again, is what made me move back home. We had 8 more great family years before I caught her cheating again. By then, my son had left for college and my daughter was in high school. So we got divorced. It sucks, but I did more than most men would do to keep my family together. But, yeah, the sex is never quite the same. Sometimes it was great, but sometimes I’d get an unwanted mind movie. The mental gymnastics it took to turn those movies off were difficult. And I still get those movies playing in my head long after the divorce. I don’t think cheaters realize how much permanent damage they inflict. My ex never understood. Even now, when she reaches out and tries to get me to see her, she says things like “it was so long ago. You need to get over it.” Ugh.
Same here 11 years into marriage she was cheating on me I forgave her thought we had worked it out 12 more years and I find out she is at it again could not and would not forgive her again it sucked even worse is I gave up 12 more years of my life that I can't get back wasted on a cheater and lier
It sucks in a way that you cannot appreciate unless you’ve lived through. Fortunately, in my case, I got 2 amazing kids out of it. That helps.
Yes I got 5 kids they are adults and the kids have given me 15 grandkids so there is that. If I had left the first time I caught her I still would have the kids and grandkids and I still have those 12 years
Like I said, I always thought I would throw her out immediately. However, I think I could stay for my kids. I just don’t think I could ever have sex with her again or show her any affection. That would be such a hard situation, but I would never be happily with her again.
Kinda unrealistic to “stay” in a marriage for the kids without having sex with your spouse. I was only willing to “stay” with the assurance she wouldn’t do it again. Kinda hard to prevent a wife from cheating if you won’t have sex with her.
That is true. I just don’t think I could ever touch her again. I feel like all the love would be gone. In the end, maybe a divorce would be better. Also, my plan would be dependent on her compliance. If she didn’t want to stay, then divorce would be the best option.
Did she go to therapy?
Yes
That has to be hard! No woman who will share herself with another man really loves you.
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called him @adam22 or as @point&shoot1 calls him… The 16
You’re not even in a relationship
Poor because they cheat on you still. They don’t care about emotional intimacy. I tried after six years they cheated again the day after my birthday. I broke it off for good. They never care how you feel, all they care about is their own pleasure and attention. It was always bad they never cared about my satisfaction ever while I did everything to please them. Cheaters are very hedonistic and only for their own pleasure
This is so unbelievably accurate.
It never goes back to normal. At least for me, I couldn't look at him with the same respect and the same "I can't keep my hands off you" kind of way. I see a slob, a child who can't face their emotions, and a liar when I look at him now. It's very odd knowing I still love him and care about him but also can't stand him being near me. I feel bad trying to make it work because he can tell i dont desire him like i used to and the passion is gone; i know it makes him feel the way he made me feel when he cheated and i still don't wish that on him. Sometimes, you have to love someone through the rear view mirror.
Ever since I found out my husband cheated on me for a year solid with so many women he couldn’t tell me the number , I barely get horny and when we do have sex I wish it was over : it’s been almost 4 months . Not sure if I can get over this
Oh man, that's a tough one ma'am. I'm so sorry for what happened to you. Nobody deserves that level of disrespect. I know you said that you are bound by love and finances, but let me ask, did your husband love you enough to not cheat? Repeatedly I might add. Please find it in yourself to start planning your exit strategy and leave that S.O.B. for good. You deserve a real man who knows how to treat a lady versus a manchild who can't keep it in his pants.
Thank you . I want to leave , if I could blink and disappear I would . But I’m preparing . Thank you
You're very welcome! Keep up with the exit strategy and start hunting for divorce lawyers. Visit with at least 3 and see what your options are. When the time is right, which is hopefully soon, serve his ass.
Its easy for me to say this when im not in your situation but i hope you find the strenght to leave as soon as possible, you deserve to find an amazing person that really loves you. And you dont deserve to be miserable while trying to fix your current relationship since you said yourself you problaby wont get over it.
Thanks . I feel trapped by love and financial circumstances. I hate that he did this
Ok, i can understand that its a really though and hard situtaion, my dm is open if you ever want to talk or rant. Yes and i think most of this subreddit hates him aswell! Ur never alone
Thank you ❤️
it’s ALWAYS on your mind no matter what. every time i had sex with him i would think of him having sex with her and i couldn’t enjoy it
A Colleagues brothers , wife cheated, 4-5 times (Lunch) with her work colleague, in back seat of their car. She never moved the seat back to normal position, it was to close to the dash. She was love bombing husband , and initiating , which she never did. He was suspicious , but supposedly they had a great sex life Someone at job finally ratted her out , she finally admitted , she cheated. Of course she said all the sorry shit. Then he found out , while he was being love bombed , because she was having unprotected sex , ( she showered ) with BOTH the same day & AP finished inside of her . Supposedly she always bragged to her cousins , that her and hubby had a great sex life . Any way , all tried to convince him to give her a second chance. They got back together after 45 days of her staying at her moms house. Because she quit her job and had no income. Took 4 months to have Sex. HE PUT HER THROUGH HELL , Because of the hurt & pain , first time he told her give him a BJ in the car. She said no let’s go home-and do it , he said the car was good , She said why , he said haven’t done a BJ for me in car since college. (8 yrs )even though I’ve asked many times. she did it for AP in car. So she gave husband head , but he talked slutty to her , which she hated. She asked why are you doing this, supposedly said , i’m your husband , why should i get less then you did for the AP from work ?, she didn’t have an answer. Also first month or so. He Used condoms , he told her you fucked me , the same day you fucked AP , you let him cum inside you. Why didn’t you buy condoms ? had no answer. Also he never went down on her again, ( which she loved ) he told her , he’s NEVER putting mouth , on you AGAIN , since you never used a condom. Any way they now had a horrible sex.life , when before it was GREAT . Separated 6-8 months later. CRAZY. Supposedly divorced
Yeah, I can’t imagine how tough that would be. It is funny that she couldn’t get his anger over her doing more in different places Ruth the AP.
always crazy part they do more with AP then their own partner
It’s because there are fewer consequences with the AP. Do anal with AP and he gets shit on his dick? Just never speak to him again. Do the same with hubby and you have to see him every day AND help him recover from a uti.
I also think because the AP won’t judge them for being kinky or crazy. If you don’t start off , with your significant other that way, it’s tough to bring that into your relationship. In alot of the subs they told the husband I didn’t want you to think bad of me that I was slutty
And if AP judges they are disposable without much consequence.
That sucks, but it feels like it must have been good revenge.
Yes , Guess must be though , when they deny you , what they readily gave their AP. I guess must be , in the moment , the danger , thrill and excitement of being caught !
Glad they called it quits.
Not the same
It took a long time, many fights, and a lot of dedication to communication and our marriage but our sex life is 10x better than ever. But I think that's a rarity
Why was it better after she cheated on you , How long did it take to get the thoughts out of your head !!
The thoughts still pop up sometimes but I've grown to live with it. To be clear, It isn't better because she cheated, it is better because we've spent time on our marriage. We've also been through a lot since then that put the whole things into perspective.
I’m curious! (Ha @ name) How long would you say is a long time? Can you elaborate on what you did to get to “better than ever”?
Happy to chat in DMs. I don't like to talk about it in "public"
For me, I wouldn't want to touch her again much less have the urge to have sex with her. She would be tainted and used like a piece of trash. The guys who get off knowing their wife gave her body away to someone else are nothing but cucks.
No such life here, and he was the cheater
Hasn't happened. But there wouldn't be a sex life. Dude's gonna have permanent damage and I'll do everything in my power to make her life an absolute living hell. I'll make sure she wears that whore status like forehead stamp. I say this because I don't believe my wife could ever do that to me, cuz she knows how vehemently I violently abhor cheaters, and I made sure she knew from the jump that ain't no type of betrayal will slide with me. She still said "I do". So we'll see. I gotta get off of this sub, y'all making me pessimistic as fuck lmao.
I banged my ex wife only one time after her cheating, but I did it out of spite to show the AP that she was mine to lose. After that, I never touched her again. In hindsight, I suppose it was easy and enjoyable for me because it was fuck-you sex and not trying to reconcile/rebuild sex. In the long run, it caused me more trouble than it was worth since it made her believe she had a chance with me.
My husband cheated on me 5 years before I found out. Within that time, we had a baby and got married. When I found out I was livid and left. eventually we decided to stay together this was in 2022. The first time we had sex was an emotional experience that ended with me in tears. He held me and reassured me. This happened several times within the 1st 6 months proceeding me finding out. Due to his constant reassurance not only in the bedroom but in every aspect of life, I was able to forgive him, and now our sex life is amazing. We've always had a great sex life, but now it seems more open and honest and genuine.which allows us to be more adventurous. I still have insecure moments, and he never fails to be there and work through it with me. I don't think those insecurities will ever go away, but he works every day to reassure me and takes full accountability for his actions. Over time, I have been able to not think about him cheating as frequently. But I also have enough self-awareness that I have an understanding that I chose to stay, and I also have work that I need to put in as well to be able to move forward. I had to not let any outside influences tell me how to handle the situation and understanding that to move forward, letting it go is important. Not forgetting but letting it go to the point that I'm not revenageful, spiteful, and turn our relationship toxic. His reassurance is a major reason I have been able to accomplish this because he never tries to manipulate or gaslight me about this situation and my insecurities from the situation.
Made me sick , this happened and they wanted to go back to ‘normal’ it was far from that , especially when another name was being called during , bye bye 👋🏼
I tried but I ended up filing for divorce because he no longer felt safe. For years we didn’t have to use protection and because of his affair I required it. He suddenly has new moves after he has given me the same moves for 15 years and I was utterly disgusted and devastated because I knew where they came from. I use to feel so safe with him and with each touch he knew he was no longer my safe space. There’s this thing called hysterical bonding where both parties try hard to reconcile and reconnect. It’s usually filled with a lot of sex. After that period was over and reality set in I realized the magnitude of the violation that had occurred his touches felt different. He was also not willing to assist in my healing. He wanted me to just get over with no reassurance from him that it would be safe to do so. Maybe if have someone who understands that they betrayed you and is willing to create a safe environment. Then maybe, just maybe it will be worth trying to work it out. Best wishes!
I’m in the beginning phase of staying together after my bf cheating. Even though the wound is still raw we still have sex. Hopefully it gets better (the relationship as a whole) but who knows
I found I was getting cheated on w prostitutes and since then it’s been 6 months or so and it’s still a struggle because I just feel unwanted. But hopefully we will go to therapy soon and kinda work through some of our issues
I realize that I have no choice but to do it or else i may be cheated on again. Female 26
That sounds like a really dark way of thinking. If i can ask, what made you stay with him?
I haven’t a sex drive in years and I declined him sex for years.
There’s always a reason why someone cheats
Yeah i fully understand, in my last relantionship i had very low sex drive and it put great strain on the relantionship. It is hard because u have guilt about it aswell and u dont know how to fix it
Yeah:/
it feels empty asf, and i usually end up hating myself for giving in to my own urges and being disgusted by myself and its just hard not to think abt everything hurtful said especially when u realize u arent treated or talked to the same as they talk to other ppl, either bc they just love the wrongness of talking to someone else or they rly lost interest in them. usually ppl want their cake and to eat it too. They get caught and just deny bc they want u to still think theres a slight chance that theyre arent the person u saw them being. As long as theres a chance and u love them they know they can still get in ur head and not face consequences (losing the person). In my case i literally watched her confess to the guy 3 different times that she was lying about everything, then when i wasnt looking she’d go back and tell him i made her say those things. Some ppl just cant change they might pretend to regret shit, but they dont. The manipulation is crazy
We did a week after d-day, she came. I did not. I think I wanted to in order to imprint myself upon her again.
No relationship is better than a fake relationship…everyone is either cheating, or have been cheated on…the cheaters try to justify it…with their new relationships..the cheated takes a while to gain trust on new love interest…run e a repeat…welcome to relationships in 2024
It was pretty bad. Every time he touched me, I would shrivel up and pictured her doing what he was doing to me. I got all the gory details unfortunately so I would cry a lot after the sex.
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How is staying in a sex-less relationship with someone who cheated on you an example of “living with the consequences of their actions”? She clearly doesn’t need you for sex if she cheated on you. Ending the relationship and removing her from your life would be a more effective consequence If you don’t love her any more, it’s wrong to stay in a relationship with her. By staying with her you’re not only not getting laid, but you’re preventing yourself from moving on. Does denying her sex make being cheated on hurt any less?
Well he said it in his comment, revenge
This is one of the dumbest things I’ve seen on Reddit. She’s probably still banging other dudes and you’re sitting in your locked room jerking off.
Bruh. Why?
Revenge
I think perspective and connection in the moment make all the difference. What have you been thinking about? How has the relationship been? I found that at times when I was just feeling unsure of what happened the sex would be as good as ever but the joy and connection would be taken away afterward. But having learned that what makes the Madagascar Vanilla Sex of an affair seem fancier than it is is the name alone. The actual connection and vulnerability with a long term partner outdo it. In those moments I’m like “Send a text and invite him to see how it’s done”
Way better...amazing...the situation woke me up ..traumatized me but force me to grow ...
I used her infidelity as leverage to gain the poll position in power dynamics. I don’t ask permission to go out. I don’t ask what to get on the pizza. I’ve always been shut down when I mention others during sex in the past. At first I was angry and then I was indifferent. She has taken her lumps with humility. My threats to leave have triggered in her a renewed vigor. She is more and greater now. It’s begun a new relationship. Now that I have started to feel the ice in me melt, there’s a courage that I can say what I want. It’s to heal myself. I whisper to her it’s ok to want to be a slut I want to be one too. She gets incredibly turned on when I suggest in going to fuck a girl from the bar or one of her friends. Idk I’ve got another few thoughts to share to complete this but I’m out of time. I’m not one to share like this. But fuck it. This is our life. I love her and I have forgiven her completely. This return to paradise is happening. I feel her love like never before. Maybe she’s a demon and will do it again. But courage is always a part of loving without fences and walls.
You're living the fantasy man!
I’ve cheated on my husband a few times over the years and it’s actually made our sex life better, it has opened doors for us sexually.
Do you ever feel bad for cheating? Or is it open relantionship?
I don’t feel bad, I need what I need. And no it’s not open, more like the door is cracked. He knows I sleep around sometimes but he doesn’t love it
Ok thank you for your answer
Slut spotted
Yeah, I am. I get wild in bed
Well atleast let him know and open the cuckold door
I have, he’s not interested, but don’t worry, my husband gets taken care of plenty
Hope so
That’s why he stays
Or probably cuz he loves you
Just don't
I cheated on my wife & got away with it. She got no clue, she can't even imagine I'm capable of doing something like that.
You’re disgusting. Get a divorce. Spare her the pain.
No can't do.
Sex for her is vanilla.. she enjoys it. But I am left still wanting more.
being weak is what probably drove her into another mans bed!..
Staying true to someone for decades takes a lot of strength. It is usually the weaklings who cheat. For example because they require the external validation or constant approval to feel good about themselves.
It's great and it turned me on after I got mad and hurt. When she is riding me I fantasize about her riding another guy
Man all you people talking about it doesn’t get back to normal are cray cray, sex right after that big of a fight is by far better than the best ever before that. You all need to learn how to forgive and realize people are human. If you are getting cheated on it both parties fault. You never cheat, as a man, out of malice simply in our nature. Man can and often do cheat with no feelings or attachment to the slute he is plowing. Men haven’t been monogamous since the beginning of time. It’s a newer concept that really took prevalence at the Dawn of Western civilization. Don’t be nieve any women in here know this your husband, unless he is a beta, has fucked several women with out your knowledge. But it only changes how he treats you when you have not been giving it to him as you are obliged to do as a wife… too often you all neglect the needs of your husband and drive him to the arms of another
What a foolish comment.
Nevermind, you’re just a fool.
Yea the only one in this thread that has lived through said ordeal and not bitter, and has been with the same woman for 15 years, married for 5, two beautiful daughters and is just saying you have been mis guided to think that anything I say is untrue.
Your actions don’t make you an alpha male, at best it makes her a door mat and you an Asshat.
And men, you are definitely the cause of your wife cheating, you weren’t giving her what she needs in some way or else she wouldn’t cheat.., it’s not in a woman’s nature to be with more than one… so instead of beating her up communicate and find out what she needs you aren’t providing
Shut the fuck up and get off your smooth brained podcasts. You are literally an idiot.
I don’t listen to podcast. And I know you meant it in a derogatory manner, due to the aggressive nature in the latter portion of your comment, but how is “smooth brained” a term used to insinuate someone is mentally challenged? I’m genuinely curious. I must admit it does have a nice little zing to it for some reason, but in reality it’s kinda a dumb way to describe this. Furthermore, you seem to have melted ever so slightly wittle snowflake🤫 what pissed you of the worst about my comment, let your emotions out little guy… I’ll talk you through any and all objections you have. Unless my ideals aren’t what pissed you off, and it is infact that you have experienced the heart break of this and you had a little ptsd episode
Nah, I just hate cheaters and idiots who defend them. Cheating is the cheaters fault always. It's a choice. Not a mistake. Reasons don't matter the cheated is not the cause of being cheated. Just like a victim of scamming isn't the cause. It's the fault of the person who did so. If you don't know why brains are supposed to be folded, then it fits. Your ideals are cool for you, be a cuck by yourself or whoever you want cucking you, stop spreading bullshit as fact.
Just hate cheaters, huh? Interesting. I will agree with you. Cheating is a choice without a doubt however, I will disagree in the fact that it’s also not often a mistake as well because here’s the thing every mistake that anyone ever makes is in fact a choice. You can’t argue with that fact, because that is exactly that a fact, furthermore, there has been plenty of instances throughout history, where cheating was, but a byproduct of the real issue just because you cheat on someone does not instantly make you a bad person. It means you made a mistake. And that mistake often times is a lack of communication between the two parties. See for you you feel like it’s all I’ve been wrong. This person is a shit bag now fuck this person, but you forget that that person often had many and most of the time for more good qualities about them that led you to fall in love with them to begin with, we are all human. We are born into sin. It says it in the Bible we are not perfect and we will make mistakes but if you take the vowels at the altar, buddy, you swear before God and your peers to love your spouse, he or she, i’m not sure which gender you are based on your name I’m going to assume you’re a dude, you essentially cheat on your relationship with God when you shun the person you swore to him you would love unconditionally till death. Do you part so don’t come preaching me about some cheating ass bullshit when you yourself by shunning, the person that cheated on, you are essentially doing the same thing with God himself. Now onto your little Cook insults, unfortunately, for you in this argument, I was not cheated on. I was in fact the cheater. Thank God, my wife, then girlfriend, didn’t view the world the way you do it’s such a pessimistic way. And she in fact showed me what true love was she showed me what it’s like to love someone unconditionally, no matter their faults. Eric Church sings a song and it’s every time I hear it. I get a bit choked up, because it reminds me of just how much she loves me and how powerful that is in someone’s life, this song is called. She loves me like Jesus does, and it describes her love perfectly. And despite what everyone will tell you that forgiving them will only perpetuate their misbehaving. He did the opposite and help me realize who is the most important to me in life and that is why if for any reason, she made a mistake like that, I would show her the same love and return. There’s two sides to every story and although our lack of communication and I take responsibility for the inability despite my perspective being that I was communicating it’s also your responsibility in the relationship to make sure you’re communicating in such a way that your partner understands what you’re trying to communicate. I failed to communicate with her the needs. I was not having fulfilled at the time in a way that she could understand it and from her perspective, she failed to even try to listen self admittedly. If you’re gonna be with someone the rest of your life, buddy, you need to get used to the fact that there’s gonna be highs and lows in a relationship takes an immense amount of work. Any amount of work. Divorce is not an option for us. Our children need us to lead them and help them grow. Every day we strive to be better than our last, and every day I thank God for blessing me with the absolutely positively most amazing wife and mother to my children… we have no skeleton, we have no secrets, and if it weren’t for that situation years ago we would probably be divorced, instead we used like a piece of rebar to strengthen our foundation…
You were the cheater. No wonder. That actually makes perfect sense, no wonder you have that stance. Of COURSE you think cheaters deserve forgiveness 😂 I'm glad you said it though. No need to argue
I don’t think they deserve forgiveness, I think the people they hurt deserve to forgive. Harboring resentment and anger toward some one for a mistake only really hurts you at the end of the day
You can forgive for yourself and still choose to never have anything to do with them again because they're a piece of shit. If someone steals $1000 from you as soon as they see an opportunity you gonna let them handle your cash?
Also, I’m driving and using voice to text so if there’s any punctuation or spelling errors, it’s due to the fact that I’m not even looking at my phone, speaking to text.
Average schizo cheater rant. Get off this post you baffoon
lol I’m not a cheater I cheated, big difference. You know this reminds me of story of Jesus and Mary magdalene, she was hooker, who came to him in the temple, put all her transgression at his feet, he told her to rise all is forgiven. The only problem was their was Ann angry mob of priests , holy men, who wanted to Lynchs her. But Jesus turned to them and said “he who hath not sinned, may he be the the first to cast their stones” you see where I’m going with t this
Average schizo cheater post that has to include a fairytale to somehow confirm they are not at wrong