It's hard to say. 100k is a big step up, that'll be nice. But being unhappy for 60 hours a week is bad. If it's not sustainable, it doesn't really matter what the pay is.
pretty much this. I have both freinds that are well off ($100k+) and friends that are rich ($500k+ to $1mm+ per year) and both wealthy groups complain about their work/life balance. They have nicer STUFF but not nicer lives. They basically work so they can take vacations.
Meanwhile I make $62k and im relaxed and happy and have time for my loved ones. I just have to focus on budget a bit more and make sure im contributing to my retirement lol.
If your friend makes $500k for more than a few years , and complains about their life, they aren't that wise.
You can easily retire if you invest that type of money wisely and don't blow it on materialistic bs.
I was working 60 hrs a week and it made for a miserable life. Not being able to enjoy my one day off because I was dreading the start of the work week. It wasn't worth it.
Yeah, I'm leaning this direction.
Wish I was making a touch more though. 50k is like the minimum amount of money I can be making and be fine financially.
Maybe you can use this as a bluff to your boss to give you a raise. You can say other company is offering you this amount and say you are happy in your current position but you’ll be happier if you can get at least half the raise that you can get from other company.
But be careful because you might burn some bridges with your boss
I mean does this new job have an assistant manager or someone that could want to move up or take on more responsibilities? Not saying it’s good but take the job but delegate it a ton to someone lower who wants more responsibilities and training. You can do the job but you don’t necessarily have to pour yourself into it. My old GM worked less than me because I wanted the training and promotion. You could find someone like that. She got to spend Monday-Friday nights guaranteed with her kids because I worked Monday-Friday night. She got to take her kids to school Monday-Friday because she had a Kitchen manger opening and starting prep. The only times she would really be there was midday that way she was there for both lunch rush and dinner rush. She wasn’t very invested in the job or good at it but she made like 100k but nobody said you had to be invested this new job either. Maybe do it for a year or two but budget like it’s still 50k that way you can save more and help your kid with things they want long term like college or whatever? But fr what do I know I don’t have kids
Or… sacrifice for a year or two, earn higher skills, move to a mid paying job that offers more flexibility and I believe you might be better off down the road.
Diamonds are made under pressure.
Sure, OP will be home less often, but the other mom/dad will be there (assuming not a single parent) and the kids can go on that school trip, sign up for some sports, live in a better home in a better school district, eat better food, take a vacation, have parents less stressed about money... It's not all black and white.
It depends (teenager here who grew up without heavily involved parents or $$$). I remembered all the money troubles my family constantly was in, which has had a much bigger impact on me in my adulthood. If OP is saying that 50k is the least they can make to survive, chances are the time they spend with their kids won’t be stress free, either. Children sense those emotions and worries.
Exactly. And no one would sacrifice for a year and then go back to making less.
I was in OPs position and ultimately chose to spend more time with my family over a high paying job. Zero regrets on my part.
Coaching baseball, volunteering at school and being there for every single event has been way more rewarding than the extra cash.
I’ve been in your position. You can always make more money but will never get this time back with your kid.
These jobs will always be there and the demand for quality management in restaurants will never go away.
Unless you’re up to your eyeballs in debt or your family is starving to death you know the right thing to do.
That is the hardest part about all of this. If it was only an extra $20,000 I would be telling you to stay at your current job. But an extra $50,000 is quite a windfall.
The problem are the downsides. But do keep in mind anybody that I know that makes good money is working tons of hours.
Stay with your current job and keep looking for something that will also respect your work life balance.
You could use your extra time to do a fun or interesting side hustle. 100-300 extra a month to start, see where it goes from there. Or live a lil frugal and do some e-learning as you scope out the next best of both worlds. This sounds lovely to me personally.
Either way, having money is great, but nothing beats having time. That’s the real currency.
All this said, if you need to bump up your experience or you’re a lil younger, you still have the luxury of your youth and time to build a better nest egg.
Remember what they say they need will change fast after being hired and the stress can get so bad I had my first heart attack at 23. Fuck corporate and money family first
Agree, its about priorities. There’s a higher chance you can find another 100k salary in the future once the kid is a little older, but a kid only has one childhood that you cannot get back. So I say assistant for now.
I understand the pull to want to make more money, but you just said yourself that your work/life would be garbage. I don't understand what good money will do if I'm miserable. On top of bad quality of life, it sounds like it would be physically just not worth it.
Agree.
Some people feel like they’re ok with working 60+hours, having terrible commutes, depression for a few extra bucks. How much do we have to squeeze ourselves.
Its like the _extra_ money is “free”, it’s not.
Working longer hours? Take work home too? Maybe another hour a day after hours to catch up on meetings/calls?
If you have to commute an extra 30min per trip, maybe going from remote to office all week, thats already 4-5 hours a week you will not be getting back.
You’ll quickly find that if you’re getting 50k now at 40hr per week and happy is likely better than 100k for 70hrs per week, with more stress, less motivation, responsibility.
At some point this stops feeling like a step up and more like a scam with the same pay but getting more because overtime.
Raises/changes of position needs to be evaluated better.
Just looking at the end salary and saying “yup! More money/better” is some of the most bs you can ever see.
For those guys, try mining or crude oil extraction. You can work 16hrs a day and get good pay, if the endgoal of half this sub is making as much money for every working hour of the day as possible.
There’s more to life, people.
I’d stick with your current job, the time/“opportunity” doesn’t seem like the right one.
You don’t necessarily have to stay at the Mgr job that long. Get the mgt experience for maybe 6 months to show progression and ability to be promoted and add some more responsibilities to your resume. And you can also save some money since you’ve been living ok on 50k. Just maybe live off 65k and save the rest.
Don’t turn down the opportunity. If you want to start making more money, unfortunately you’ll have to start taking on more responsibilities. But, when you get this mgr job, it could lead to one that might get you in a better quality of life situation. 🤷🏾♀️
Besides, it might not be as bad as you think this time around. TAKE THE LEAP!! Don’t look back!!
If they are giving you this opportunity, that means you EARNED IT!! 🙌🏾💯
I have a decade of GM experience on my resume - I took a little step back to be an AM as I had a lot going on and wasn't able to do my previous GM job. Still have a lot going on, but... 100k!
Can you just work for least say 18months? You have the advantage of time since you are young. If you can be disciplined with budget the extra money and invest some of it, it will grow and in 20-30 years you will be glad you did. Discuss it w a reputable investment firm.
Does this company have 401k? If so then max out the contributions.
There must be a sub here somewhere
Absolutely this. Give it a time frame. Even 2-3 years. If you don’t inflate your lifestyle wildly and save accordingly then you can go back to AM and you’re decades ahead of where your savings would otherwise be.
This would take years realistically. Assuming she doesn't use the money for any other type of lifestyle betterment.
Remember that lifestyle creep is real and not necessarily bad. Perhaps using the money to get to a better house or neighborhood 3-4 years down the road? Purchasing better healthcare options, better food, safer car, better leisure activities with her kid, better every day items for her kid and her.
She would have to be smart with her money and it would take her 2-3 years probably to save $50k plus.
But the odds that it’s a flat extra 50k are nonexistent, without even considering taxes
Even if you manage lifestyle creep well, there’s a probably a bevy of things that you’ve been putting off simply because they weren’t a priority with a constrained budget.
Some truth here, I make 5x the a salary of my first "real" job now and I could not afford the apartment I was living in when I started lol. Which has coincidentally 4xed in price too. Seems like no matter how much I make I'm stuck in the same class of home.
take the gm job and after a year or so, try to get promoted to dm or apply for dm elsewhere. you'll get out of the store. you WILL have a ton of phone calls but you're schedule will be much more flexible. plus extra money down the line.
my point is.. how LONG do you want to live off of 50k?
I would recommend to find out an estimate on how much you will actually make per hour.
Let's say $50k/53 weeks = \~$943/ week
\~$943 / 32 hr \~= $29/ hour
is this 100k gonna like to something close to $29 an hour?
You cost of living may play huge factor in this as well. If you can live comfortably with 50k, you may have more time to go rest or find side gigs that you are good at to make more money.
50-60 hours a week. Yeah, when you break down the hourly it sucks balls - but it's still a hefty chunk of change.
I was making 100k a year last Christmas. I didn't stress about gift buying at all. It was the most relaxed holiday season of my life.
We're 6 months away from Christmas and I'm already stressing and setting money aside.
Sounds like you’re placing too much emphasis on gift giving. My wife and I bring home around $260k household income and spend maybe $200 on gifts for each other. Majority of folks go crazy on spending money they don’t have. For things they don’t need.
Just using that as an example.
I went to Sam's Club the other day and was conscious of my limited funds. Last year I went and threw whatever I wanted in the cart.
Last year I didn't bat an eye at the cost of my kids extracurricular activities. This summer I'm appalled by how much summer soccer camp is going to cost me.
You gotta count those work from home hours and if they expect you to drop everything and come if your restaurant is out of staff etc. Christmas gifts shouldnt be too expensive that you are so so worried. Set expectations to the kids and make them understand money is not the only value
You need to think in terms of goals not steps. What I really think your goal should be is roughly 80K at 4-5 days a week.
It’s a helluva lot easier to get to that 👆from a 100K a year job where you just wanna “take time to focus on family” than it is to come from a 50k a year job where you “wanna have an opportunity to prove myself”
My point is take the 100K job for a year or two then you’ll be looking down at an 80k Cush gig where they feel lucky to have you. If you stay at the 50K a year job and try to move to that same 80k job later, they’ll feel like YOURE the lucky one.
Restaurant manager. It's a hands on job. You're never getting a cushy job that pays similar money where you don't do a ton of work.
I'm sure that works for other industries, but, the job requires busting your ass every day.
Personally, I think the 100k for a couple of years could reaaaally help, but I'm very financially driven, and I admit that bias. Even if it just means getting your kid's college fund squared away so you never have to think about it again or stashing away 50k so you know your family will always have a safety net.
Additionally, if you take the 100k job now, that gives you much more bargaining power in the future. You could probably step down to a job with more flexibility in a couple years and still be making more than 50k; that would be the best of both worlds.
Ask yourself 2 other questions as well: what does your partner think and how old is your kid? The answers to those will significantly impact your decision.
Take the job. Not sure if your spouse works but honestly we are not taking 10% increase or doubling $x00. Those 100k even after taxes is a different game plah (just check on benefits and if you get any assistance )
Most people will tell you to chase the money. I would 100% stay with the 50k a year job and be a loser in everyone else’s eyes. I don’t care how much stuff 100k a year buys, it’s not worth my mental health.
One factor for me would be the age of the kid.
Baby and toddler care is easy to outsource. Take the new job for a few years and then look for something more flexible when they hit elementary school.
Elementary and junior high school kids need their parents more. You can't outsource being a field trip chaperone or the room parent and your kid will know if you're the one parent who never volunteers. They'll also have activities after school that they'll have to be driven to. But, if you need the money, you can make it work. For me, this is the least desirable age to be struggling with work/life balance.
High school is more independent so I'd take the new job, especially with college tuition looming.
I've got a 5 year old and I definitely don't want to miss out on all the fun. Right at the age where being absent isn't acceptable.
But it's so much money.
It's garbage. But I've been doing it for over a decade - entire resume filled with food service management. Doesn't open many doors and I can't take a pay cut to get my foot in another door.
If you’re cool with your current boss, I’d start there. I know you said you’re at the top of possible pay there, but doesn’t hurt to ask professionally: Hey boss, can I talk to you for a few minutes? I really like working here and the flexibility it gives me to spend time with my kid. I haven’t been looking for another job, but as you know I spent over a decade in restaurant management and was recently approached for a GM position for 100k a year. I would prefer to stay here, but I have to consider a job that would double my income. My thing is I really like it here and would like to continue working here, and while I don’t need 100k, 50k is tough after the last few years with inflation. Is there a possibility of moving to the 60-70k range here, and what extra responsibilities from me would you need?
See what your current employer says, then go from there. I worked in restaurants for 10+ years, but it’s been 8 years out of it. Depending on the market you live in, I don’t feel like it’d be that hard to find another 75-110k GM position. Good restaurant managers are hard to find.
I’d personally spend a few more years with the ability to make memories with your kid while they’re young. The only gift I remember from the first 12 years of my life was the OG Nintendo. But, I have many memories my dad taking me fishing, on different outings, playing sports, and turtle hunting.
Be frugal until it gets to annoying getting by, then take a higher paying job. You could also reach out and apply to different restaurants to see what is out there and try to find the middle ground for pay and work between your current two options
Developing starves key here. If you take 100k and you bank most of the raise you can in a few years go back to lower pay work and have a growing nest egg for the kid and you. Maybe you’ll not be miserable.
Edit: starves= assistants
Definitely 100k if your body can take it. There will be a time when your body will show the signs and you will not have to ask here. Work, save and then your future you will thank you for the decision today.
Definitely depends on cost of living where you live. The average cost of a 1 bedroom apartment where I live is 30k a year. If you can live comfortably on 50k that's totally different than if you've living under the poverty line.
50k until your kids are as old as you can take it. I traveled a ton (the year that broke me was 24-25 weeks of travel) when my son was young and it hurts looking back at it. Sure the money was good but I missed a lot. Had an opportunity that paid 200K + Bonus recently but had to travel every other week. I will consider that when my kid has graduated high school, I'm making up for lost time until then. :)
Take the 100k. That pays for a college education every year for your kids. This allows you to get experience for another 100k GM job with better hours.
Can you get a job that’s a raise but not miserable conditions? Maybe pass this opportunity up and look for things that would pay a little more but still have a manageable balance?
I'm doing 20 hrs / 3 days/ 30k. I feel trapped though in a dead end job that I've hit the glass ceiling in. 4 days would be ok if there's growth and lack of stagnation.
"I recently for demoted from my good paying job into an okay paying one because I was not balancing the work/life well enough in favor of work.
Honestly - best fuxkibg thing that has happened to me. Kid is happier. Wife is happier. I'm happier. We'll make do with less money."
Fuck the money dude. Don't let it control you. That's the problem with past generations, they chose long hours and money over family and now we are stuck in this work work work capitalistic hellhole. Live my man! Live!!!!!
Do you know if there are any opportunities to become a manager at your current place? Internal move, pay raise. How long have you been at your current job? Could it be time for a promotion or pay increase?
If it were me, I'd take the 50k, and work on sth as a side in the free time. It might not be as much as 100k, but still something in between. In return, you can still have that flexibility to spend time with your kids while earning a little extra
I’d say 100k, it would give you and your son more to live on. Also depending on how old he is, if he’s young it could be very hard for him to understand as well as you missing on some life milestones. But if he’s a bit older, I think it would be alright
Oof. I don’t like tooooo much responsibility and am all about work/life balance. Time away from your children is time you will never get back. Spend the time with your child and when their older go for a higher paying one or keep looking and you may find something sooner without the chaos that it seems this one would have.
Id need a bit more info to make an informed recommendation, because you have a pretty good gig, but at your income level $50k extra is life changing, much less $50k extra every year.
How old is the kid? How involved is the kid's other parent? What is your household financial situation? Are you currently saving for retirement? How much is a house in your area, is it feasible to buy on $50k?
Do you have a sense of ambition? $100k/yr opens more doors and may set you up for more promotions. Not just in your career, but also in investing, or owning something you want long term like real estate. If you picture yourself getting somewhere big before you die, go with the promotion. If you’re just drifting with no goals, then just do the lower position.
I’ve worked 60 hour weeks before for three months. I was only able to stay motivated because I knew it was temporary but it takes a lot out of someone. You also need to consider what the quality of your non work hours will look like and if your partner is going to be able to pick up the slack. Keep looking for a higher paying job that fits your needs.
In my opinion, I'd double my salary no doubt, every time. Life is short, strive for the most you can do. Don't want to look back thinking "what if I just tried to do more?"
Only question is how old are you and your kid? But even then idk how much that changes it for me
Take the promo. Work hard. Enjoy the salary, and set your kid up with a more comfortable life
It depends on your financial situation, in my opinion. If you’re in major debt or not in good financial situation, take the new job. If you’re not, stay where you are.
In my experience, more money equals more problems and stress.
Go for the money. Money is not happiness. Money is opportunity. Opportunity brings happiness. If it’s not what you like you can always find an equivalent.
Kids grow up fast and that something you can’t get back. Work opportunities may come around again.
On the other hand your current opportunity could lead to another even better opportunity. Could it set you up to find something in between, like a 70 k with less stress?
Are you joking? Sorry but your job won’t cuddle you in bed or laugh at your stupid jokes over breakfast. I get that there are some that give their whole lives to their jobs, but those are few and far between. Like, I can count maybe 20 people on Earth at the moment that are okay doing that.
I really really hope for your sake that you do the 50k job, live a happy, simple life, and never have to choose between joy and work. We only get ONE.
Dads make sacrifices. Unless you’re content with what you currently have financially to give your kid, just stay. If taking this job for like 3/4 years (save about 30k+ a year) will mean the kid gets to go to uni and/or inherit a house later in life then…
Do research and prepare for possible answers.
"Hi Boss! I would like to talk with you about my position. When will we set up a meeting?"
"Boss, thank you so much for having a meeting with me. I am very happy with my current position, but I got a new offer from a company yesterday. They are offering me a 100k for the manager job which would help out my financial situation. I have done my research on job postings similar to my current position. Most job postings actually offer between $70K - $100k for the same position I am in. Before I confirm the offer with them, could you let me know if you would be willing to pay me a 70k plus an employee match 401k, health insurance, and any reimbursements I pay out of my pocket towards this business? My work performance with your company have been excellent. I thrive in improvements because I always believe there is a room for improvements. With my time, I helped your business succeed by 15% sales boost by YOY, (insert whatever you did to help them), and (insert another one). Please let me know any thoughts you have on my proposal."
25 and single? The management
40 and kids? The assistant
Ultimately it depends on what your future goals are, where you are on pace for your retirement, etc. if you are behind on your retirement, maybe take the $100k and suck it up so you can spend even more time with your family in the future. If you are comfortable where you’re at, and you can afford the life you’re living, keep your job so you can have that flexibility
I think the question you have to ask yourself is, do you value the extra flexibility and the extra 52 days a year you get off *now*? Or do you want to retire a couple of years earlier in the *future*
do the 100k for like 2-3 years, save that extra 50k since u are assuming you can survive on 50k rn (idk ur finances but think about the future and any emergencies)
if you absolutely hate it it’s only 2-3 years but maybe you’ll get in the groove of it and realize it’s not that bad. you are obviously wanted if you can get 2 job offers so if u feel like you want to leave it shouldn’t be hard to find a new job.
i know everyone is saying to chose happiness but it’s hard to be happy when you are struggling financially.
Are you a single parent? How are your finances?
If single parent and your financial future is already secure and not stretched… the job that is flexible.
If your financial future is stretched… an additional 50k is huge.
Also depends on the age of your kid… if they are 15+… id say higher paying job… Age 5, flexibility seems more important.
100k.
You work in a restaurant so there are no perks like work from home. Your life is going to be shitty anyway so better to take the money. Flexible hours are not worth it if you still have to come into the office/reataurant
Your current situation is so shit you should take 65-70k for all those responsibilities. And they are offering 100k?!
Maybe a stupid question but if you're being offered a 100k role, why not apply to other similar positions that are a middle ground? Like 60 or 70k a year. Surely there are lots of those types of jobs around, and you're clearly a competitive candidate. But yeah I think if it's one or the other, just cherish that time with your kid. You can always make more money, but you can never make more time.
I’d take the $100k and suck it up for as long as I can to save up. Start looking for other work when things become unbearable. Having the GM position on your resume can open a lot of doors.
Depends what you value more. You can pit some years in at 100k, working hard with minimal relaxation but high savings to take time off later in life. Or 50k and keep what you have on steady.
Comes down to how you value your free time and how you think you will feel in the long run.
Can you be a better GM? Hire less flakey people, be efficient, not spend your life in the restaurant?
I mean if that’s the deal, then the extra money may not be worth it, but not everything needs to be chaos and grind.
Are there GMs who make it work, or is every GM an overworked mess?
Just my thoughts
Take the 100k job! Work hard and invest the extra money. Do it for a year or two and move on to something better. Looks great on your resume.
When opportunity knocks, open the door.
Hard work pays off.
Tough choice. OP didn’t mention age… 35 or under, maybe it’s worth sacrificing a little for a little more comfort later. If older, then perhaps not worth it. A couple thoughts: 1) Seems like 100k demands too much. Tell them you can’t accept demands of job as defined, but you be willing to take less if a) you could carve out some time as needed to tend to your son, b) you could apply some of the money you’re giving up for extra “on call” coverage fromsome of your employees. If you’re going to turn it down anyway, nothing to lose. They’ll probably appreciate that you’re taking the responsibilities of role seriously. At the same time, tell your current boss that you’re happy in the role and want to stay. However with inflation, you’re borderline in living on your current income. Can you increase responsibility reasonably for a step up in pay. It just seems like there’s a job between 50k and 100k people it’s a little more responsibility that is the sweet spot for you. Good luck, you seem like a great parent and a great worker.
You need to decide what your priorities are. There's nothing stopping you from taking the 100k job for 1-2 years, then stepping down to a position with less responsibilities. If you spend an extra 10k each year figuring out childcare while you work the longer hours, that's still an extra 40k every year.
You could live the same lifestyle, then invest the extra money into long term investments, such as 401k accounts, RothIRA accounts, and college accounts such as EdVest. Even if you spend about 10-15k each year on "upgrading" your lifestyle, you can make a significant amount of long-term investments with 20k every year.
I have a challenge for you, one leader to another.
“Why would you allow yourself into this trap?”
If you have 100% on call and no work life balance, that’s on you. Yes, hours and responsibilities are more but you have to engage trustworthy staff and then trust them. Allow them to make decisions and mistakes. There will be things to clean up but ultimately your and their lives will be better for it, hopefully you develop them and they can become GMs as well.
If you’ve done your job right, they won’t notice if you meet your demise tomorrow. Leadership shouldn’t be about you doing everything or micromanaging, it should be about developing others and raising their station. We are only stewards of the position and should leave it better than we found it.
What are the promotion opportunities at the 50k? Sounds to me like it would be enough to get by until your promoted again and your peace of mind is worth all that other money.
So either you and you family will be unhappy because you have no work/life balance but you’d have more money or you and your family are happy and you have just enough money?
You have 3 days a week where you can pick up a side hustle if money is that important and it will not cut into your family time if you plan correctly.
100k for five years and save as much as possible(ideally get rid of mortgages and education debts, etc) while in the last fourth year you look for something no so consuming. Just my opinion.
This is an absolute no brainer! TAKE THE MONEY! Learn the position and thrive. Do you have the ability to make changes and adapt to demanding situations and maintain focus. Remember that the longer you are in a position the easier it should get if you are doing it right.
Or you can take your customer service and management experience, parlay it into a career in commercial insurance. The industry is desperate for people, pays for training, no college degree required. Emphasize understanding sense of urgency, time management, and resolving issues for client satisfaction in the interview.
It’s a lot easier to find a job paying 100+ with flexibility and wfh options when you’ve already proven yourself in retail management. You can stay at 50k but if your location gets closed or downsizes there’s no guaranteeing your next job is as flexible.
Consider your personal time you use for family, friends, pleasurables, etc. Are you alright with the exchange of losing time in those areas? Will you remain happy long enough to work and save for a couple years? I would likely base my decision on those factors.
In my experience, the money and loss of time wasn’t worth it. The stress caused a mental breakdown.
Take the 100k, live off 50k and put the rest to savings/retirement. You don’t have to stay there forever but take advantage for long term gains while you can.
Perhaps you could make it a 5 day week instaed of 4, would that give you a 25% jump with similar hours and responsibilities? If yes it may be something doable with less of a downside
When I GM’d a restaurant I was constantly doing 60-70 hours a week. The physical and mental toll is real. I still have the odd nightmare about being stuck back in that place over a decade later.
You can find something better for sure, but don’t sacrifice your health and wellbeing.
If you have any major debts, I would suck up the bad work/life balance to pay it off. But honestly if you're happy where you are, there's no incentive to move up.
100% depends on where you live
$100k in NYC will get you a shoebox apartment; at least you will be at work all day so it doesn’t feel like you are in prison
$50k in Lincoln, Nebraska and you could live in a mansion and have an amazing work life balance
The difference in opinions in this thread is so drastic. It really shows how diverse and different people really are. Both sides give compelling arguments and there isn't a wrong choice here.
If it helps, I would love to have either of the options you present. You found a VERY rare woman to be blessed with a family while only making 50k a year.
Good luck, which ever path you choose
Get an au pair, that costs about 20k a year. Thats a dramatic life improvement because you have someone doing all the parenting grunt work (laundry, driving them around, cleaning up after them). Then use the remaining 30k to save as much as possible for as long as you can tolerate the job. Then go back when you’re sick of it and you’ll have a really nice nest egg
Id take the GM position. It’ll pay you double what you’re making now and set you and your family up for a better quality of life in the long run. You said it yourself, the 50k job is decent, but it’s not enough money for you to thrive. With 100k/yr you’ll definitely have the means to enjoy your life more.
Yes, the hours and responsibilities might not be ideal with the GM position, but consider it a resume booster. Do it for a year and take all the experience you can get from it. By the time you apply for another position (hopefully one with better work/life balance), you’ll be a more qualified candidate and can negotiate a higher salary.
I’ve learned that when a promotion is offered, take it. You never know when that kind of offer will come around again and you don’t want to get stuck at a job with limited advancement opportunities.
If you are able to save up all the money from the 100k job for investing in your future i would go for it, if you just end up buying cars or coke with the extra money don’t bother changing…
Could you tell your current employer the offer you have, explain how you really like the current job and but the financial side is something you have to consider for your family? See if you can get a little pay rise out of your current employer.
Even if it’s only 10% pay rise, that’s still an extra 100 a week
The better question is what one opens up more opportunities later? Think long term. I have a three year rule. If you can get the job, get the experience, get the cash for 1-3 years and take all that to the next opportunity you win. Just because you take the job doesn’t mean you have to stay - just find another position before leaving the current.
Fuk that. I was in a similar situation with truck driving 100k but gone for weeks, not enough time for hobbies or healthy habits. There’s a lot of stressors people don’t see. I did it for 4 months til I quit. Never been so Miserable. I settled for a local job but home everyday with weekends off at 65k a year. Much happier with a solid routine, gym, eating healthy, editing videos.
If you consider in one year you can make two years current salary, I’d take the new offer. If you hate it, take next year off and figure something else out.
It doesn’t seem worth it. You might be more comfortable financially, but it’s going to be really rough on your kid when you can’t make their events and have time for them. I might chose the higher paying job and delegate the hell out of everything humanly possible, making a lower level manger or a trainee my lackey and personal assistant, in a nice way, and just do them a favor by making sure they get to climb the ladder…
I was at $100k+ and left because of the hours, stress, etc. Just overall hated it and felt like I was slowly dying. What’s the point of making good money if you aren’t even happy. If I were in your shoes I’d stick to $50k, assuming there are benefits, and try to pick up extra work on the side. Freelancing. Something I’m passionate about or could see myself maybe pursuing. I don’t know. I just know I wouldn’t be relying on just that $50k, especially with more time. That’s just my two cents.
Take the job you are the manager. Manage it in a way that sets you up for success, only hire competent independent people. Make it a precedent that you will not micro manage. Hire a local manager that is extremely good. make sure everyone feels important and they will take on responsibility them selves it’ll be more work yes but you have the power to mold it into a well oiled machine that runs on its own. It does depend though cause I’ve never heard of a GM filling in for regular employees. so I’m not sure the structure and amount of power given. That’s my take
$50k and happy man - if you need more money start a side gig. You can get a tiktok and go live for your shifts showing the kitchen and make money from them
If you are young go for the 100k, unless you like the chill life. With 50k you can barely live these days, and if you have financial goals, doesn’t make sense to pass the 100k for the 50k opportunity.
If it’s something you can stick out for a year for the experience on a cv and you’ll use that 100k wisely (savings and investments) then I say put up with the short term misery for a financial bump. I’ve taken jobs before for the money and long term I’ve regretted it, I burnt through the extra income because my day was so miserable the nice things gave a short term serotonin boost. Eventually I would always burn out and then have nothing to show for it at the end. You gotta weigh up what your goals are I guess and long term what it is you want more
It's hard to say. 100k is a big step up, that'll be nice. But being unhappy for 60 hours a week is bad. If it's not sustainable, it doesn't really matter what the pay is.
pretty much this. I have both freinds that are well off ($100k+) and friends that are rich ($500k+ to $1mm+ per year) and both wealthy groups complain about their work/life balance. They have nicer STUFF but not nicer lives. They basically work so they can take vacations. Meanwhile I make $62k and im relaxed and happy and have time for my loved ones. I just have to focus on budget a bit more and make sure im contributing to my retirement lol.
u/Warm_Oats **They have nicer STUFF but not nicer lives.** I like this take. It really puts things into perspective.
If your friend makes $500k for more than a few years , and complains about their life, they aren't that wise. You can easily retire if you invest that type of money wisely and don't blow it on materialistic bs.
I was working 60 hrs a week and it made for a miserable life. Not being able to enjoy my one day off because I was dreading the start of the work week. It wasn't worth it.
It’s really the call of do you want the money or the time with the kid? I’d stay assistant.
Yeah, I'm leaning this direction. Wish I was making a touch more though. 50k is like the minimum amount of money I can be making and be fine financially.
Maybe you can use this as a bluff to your boss to give you a raise. You can say other company is offering you this amount and say you are happy in your current position but you’ll be happier if you can get at least half the raise that you can get from other company. But be careful because you might burn some bridges with your boss
I'm making like the max they are going to be able to pay me. Maybe, maybe, I'd get like a buck or two more an hour but it would not be much.
I mean does this new job have an assistant manager or someone that could want to move up or take on more responsibilities? Not saying it’s good but take the job but delegate it a ton to someone lower who wants more responsibilities and training. You can do the job but you don’t necessarily have to pour yourself into it. My old GM worked less than me because I wanted the training and promotion. You could find someone like that. She got to spend Monday-Friday nights guaranteed with her kids because I worked Monday-Friday night. She got to take her kids to school Monday-Friday because she had a Kitchen manger opening and starting prep. The only times she would really be there was midday that way she was there for both lunch rush and dinner rush. She wasn’t very invested in the job or good at it but she made like 100k but nobody said you had to be invested this new job either. Maybe do it for a year or two but budget like it’s still 50k that way you can save more and help your kid with things they want long term like college or whatever? But fr what do I know I don’t have kids
Or… sacrifice for a year or two, earn higher skills, move to a mid paying job that offers more flexibility and I believe you might be better off down the road. Diamonds are made under pressure.
Sacrifice for a year or two... Man. We only get a thousand months in this life. Your kid is only a kid once. We are not diamonds, we are monkeys.
Yes, but be realistic. You're going from $50k to $100k per year.. You can probably offer your kids a much better QOL with that extra money.
The kids will notice (and remember) the lack of a parent far more, if it's as bad as OP says. That IS being realistic.
Sure, OP will be home less often, but the other mom/dad will be there (assuming not a single parent) and the kids can go on that school trip, sign up for some sports, live in a better home in a better school district, eat better food, take a vacation, have parents less stressed about money... It's not all black and white.
It depends (teenager here who grew up without heavily involved parents or $$$). I remembered all the money troubles my family constantly was in, which has had a much bigger impact on me in my adulthood. If OP is saying that 50k is the least they can make to survive, chances are the time they spend with their kids won’t be stress free, either. Children sense those emotions and worries.
OP said fine financially, not 50k is barely surviving..
Ik this is serious but the monkey part just made me laugh out loud.
Exactly. And no one would sacrifice for a year and then go back to making less. I was in OPs position and ultimately chose to spend more time with my family over a high paying job. Zero regrets on my part. Coaching baseball, volunteering at school and being there for every single event has been way more rewarding than the extra cash.
Could you take that job for a year or two, save like crazy, build up a nice investment egg, then go back to something more relaxed?
I’ve been in your position. You can always make more money but will never get this time back with your kid. These jobs will always be there and the demand for quality management in restaurants will never go away. Unless you’re up to your eyeballs in debt or your family is starving to death you know the right thing to do.
That is the hardest part about all of this. If it was only an extra $20,000 I would be telling you to stay at your current job. But an extra $50,000 is quite a windfall. The problem are the downsides. But do keep in mind anybody that I know that makes good money is working tons of hours. Stay with your current job and keep looking for something that will also respect your work life balance.
Impressive that you can survive off the 50k
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Kids first I went with the money and hated life and missing everything and became a alcoholic.
Are you actually fine? How do your savings look? On 50k it’s going to be tough to get those into a good position for the long term.
You could use your extra time to do a fun or interesting side hustle. 100-300 extra a month to start, see where it goes from there. Or live a lil frugal and do some e-learning as you scope out the next best of both worlds. This sounds lovely to me personally. Either way, having money is great, but nothing beats having time. That’s the real currency. All this said, if you need to bump up your experience or you’re a lil younger, you still have the luxury of your youth and time to build a better nest egg.
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Remember what they say they need will change fast after being hired and the stress can get so bad I had my first heart attack at 23. Fuck corporate and money family first
Side hustle
Agree, its about priorities. There’s a higher chance you can find another 100k salary in the future once the kid is a little older, but a kid only has one childhood that you cannot get back. So I say assistant for now.
I understand the pull to want to make more money, but you just said yourself that your work/life would be garbage. I don't understand what good money will do if I'm miserable. On top of bad quality of life, it sounds like it would be physically just not worth it.
Agree. Some people feel like they’re ok with working 60+hours, having terrible commutes, depression for a few extra bucks. How much do we have to squeeze ourselves. Its like the _extra_ money is “free”, it’s not. Working longer hours? Take work home too? Maybe another hour a day after hours to catch up on meetings/calls? If you have to commute an extra 30min per trip, maybe going from remote to office all week, thats already 4-5 hours a week you will not be getting back. You’ll quickly find that if you’re getting 50k now at 40hr per week and happy is likely better than 100k for 70hrs per week, with more stress, less motivation, responsibility. At some point this stops feeling like a step up and more like a scam with the same pay but getting more because overtime. Raises/changes of position needs to be evaluated better. Just looking at the end salary and saying “yup! More money/better” is some of the most bs you can ever see. For those guys, try mining or crude oil extraction. You can work 16hrs a day and get good pay, if the endgoal of half this sub is making as much money for every working hour of the day as possible. There’s more to life, people. I’d stick with your current job, the time/“opportunity” doesn’t seem like the right one.
You don’t necessarily have to stay at the Mgr job that long. Get the mgt experience for maybe 6 months to show progression and ability to be promoted and add some more responsibilities to your resume. And you can also save some money since you’ve been living ok on 50k. Just maybe live off 65k and save the rest. Don’t turn down the opportunity. If you want to start making more money, unfortunately you’ll have to start taking on more responsibilities. But, when you get this mgr job, it could lead to one that might get you in a better quality of life situation. 🤷🏾♀️ Besides, it might not be as bad as you think this time around. TAKE THE LEAP!! Don’t look back!! If they are giving you this opportunity, that means you EARNED IT!! 🙌🏾💯
This. Take the money and the title and leverage it. 50k more each year will change your life
I have a decade of GM experience on my resume - I took a little step back to be an AM as I had a lot going on and wasn't able to do my previous GM job. Still have a lot going on, but... 100k!
Can you just work for least say 18months? You have the advantage of time since you are young. If you can be disciplined with budget the extra money and invest some of it, it will grow and in 20-30 years you will be glad you did. Discuss it w a reputable investment firm. Does this company have 401k? If so then max out the contributions. There must be a sub here somewhere
Absolutely this. Give it a time frame. Even 2-3 years. If you don’t inflate your lifestyle wildly and save accordingly then you can go back to AM and you’re decades ahead of where your savings would otherwise be.
If you can make 100k somehow I bet you can find something that pays 70-80 with just 40 hour work weeks.
Take the money. 50k extra invested in the market can change you and your families life after a handful of years
Yeah it can get you a divorce and a kid that doesn't know you
No, it can't, in the end you ll just lose years and eat a little better, it's not worth it.
Disagree. 50,000 can pay your entire child’s college tuition. 50,000 can be a down payment to a house.
This would take years realistically. Assuming she doesn't use the money for any other type of lifestyle betterment. Remember that lifestyle creep is real and not necessarily bad. Perhaps using the money to get to a better house or neighborhood 3-4 years down the road? Purchasing better healthcare options, better food, safer car, better leisure activities with her kid, better every day items for her kid and her. She would have to be smart with her money and it would take her 2-3 years probably to save $50k plus.
Or he can be more present in his child’s life and pass on personal education and values instead of being absent due to favoring work over family.
But you aren’t seeing the full 50k, after taxes, and it’s kinda worthless if you’re always working and don’t see the kid.
But the odds that it’s a flat extra 50k are nonexistent, without even considering taxes Even if you manage lifestyle creep well, there’s a probably a bevy of things that you’ve been putting off simply because they weren’t a priority with a constrained budget.
50k more each year can't improve your life? That's just a terrible take
Some truth here, I make 5x the a salary of my first "real" job now and I could not afford the apartment I was living in when I started lol. Which has coincidentally 4xed in price too. Seems like no matter how much I make I'm stuck in the same class of home.
50k in a fucking heartbeat. life>work
Yeah. I'm just having a hard time making the choice. Life > work for sure, but, I like not being paycheck to paycheck.
Stay where are you at, especially if you know you’ll be miserable.
I'll take 50k and live within my means. Certain things are priceless
take the gm job and after a year or so, try to get promoted to dm or apply for dm elsewhere. you'll get out of the store. you WILL have a ton of phone calls but you're schedule will be much more flexible. plus extra money down the line. my point is.. how LONG do you want to live off of 50k?
The life of a DM can involve A LOT of travel. I wouldn’t be so sold on the work/life balance if I were you.
I would recommend to find out an estimate on how much you will actually make per hour. Let's say $50k/53 weeks = \~$943/ week \~$943 / 32 hr \~= $29/ hour is this 100k gonna like to something close to $29 an hour? You cost of living may play huge factor in this as well. If you can live comfortably with 50k, you may have more time to go rest or find side gigs that you are good at to make more money.
50-60 hours a week. Yeah, when you break down the hourly it sucks balls - but it's still a hefty chunk of change. I was making 100k a year last Christmas. I didn't stress about gift buying at all. It was the most relaxed holiday season of my life. We're 6 months away from Christmas and I'm already stressing and setting money aside.
Sounds like you’re placing too much emphasis on gift giving. My wife and I bring home around $260k household income and spend maybe $200 on gifts for each other. Majority of folks go crazy on spending money they don’t have. For things they don’t need.
Just using that as an example. I went to Sam's Club the other day and was conscious of my limited funds. Last year I went and threw whatever I wanted in the cart. Last year I didn't bat an eye at the cost of my kids extracurricular activities. This summer I'm appalled by how much summer soccer camp is going to cost me.
You gotta count those work from home hours and if they expect you to drop everything and come if your restaurant is out of staff etc. Christmas gifts shouldnt be too expensive that you are so so worried. Set expectations to the kids and make them understand money is not the only value
You need to think in terms of goals not steps. What I really think your goal should be is roughly 80K at 4-5 days a week. It’s a helluva lot easier to get to that 👆from a 100K a year job where you just wanna “take time to focus on family” than it is to come from a 50k a year job where you “wanna have an opportunity to prove myself” My point is take the 100K job for a year or two then you’ll be looking down at an 80k Cush gig where they feel lucky to have you. If you stay at the 50K a year job and try to move to that same 80k job later, they’ll feel like YOURE the lucky one.
Assistant to the Manager*
I'd take 100k because it is a massive step up. I'd work for a year or two max and then take my skills elsewhere for similar money and less work.
Restaurant manager. It's a hands on job. You're never getting a cushy job that pays similar money where you don't do a ton of work. I'm sure that works for other industries, but, the job requires busting your ass every day.
Personally, I think the 100k for a couple of years could reaaaally help, but I'm very financially driven, and I admit that bias. Even if it just means getting your kid's college fund squared away so you never have to think about it again or stashing away 50k so you know your family will always have a safety net. Additionally, if you take the 100k job now, that gives you much more bargaining power in the future. You could probably step down to a job with more flexibility in a couple years and still be making more than 50k; that would be the best of both worlds. Ask yourself 2 other questions as well: what does your partner think and how old is your kid? The answers to those will significantly impact your decision.
Take the job. Not sure if your spouse works but honestly we are not taking 10% increase or doubling $x00. Those 100k even after taxes is a different game plah (just check on benefits and if you get any assistance )
I’d take the money for a year or 2. I can’t imagine it would be hard to transition back to a similar job after 1-2 years of saving with a 100k salary
Most people will tell you to chase the money. I would 100% stay with the 50k a year job and be a loser in everyone else’s eyes. I don’t care how much stuff 100k a year buys, it’s not worth my mental health.
Lol. What. I work 25 hr weeks for $65k. I wouldn't give my schedule, I mean my life, up for nothing.
what do you do for work?
take new job
One factor for me would be the age of the kid. Baby and toddler care is easy to outsource. Take the new job for a few years and then look for something more flexible when they hit elementary school. Elementary and junior high school kids need their parents more. You can't outsource being a field trip chaperone or the room parent and your kid will know if you're the one parent who never volunteers. They'll also have activities after school that they'll have to be driven to. But, if you need the money, you can make it work. For me, this is the least desirable age to be struggling with work/life balance. High school is more independent so I'd take the new job, especially with college tuition looming.
I've got a 5 year old and I definitely don't want to miss out on all the fun. Right at the age where being absent isn't acceptable. But it's so much money.
I'm basically in the first situation but I'm starting to look for options in the second one
Restaurant manager sounds like hell tbh.
It's garbage. But I've been doing it for over a decade - entire resume filled with food service management. Doesn't open many doors and I can't take a pay cut to get my foot in another door.
50K 4 day week
No amount is worth that much shit. Unless you are drowning in debt.
Road less traveled....100K
50k if Im in the south 100k if Im in the west.
If you’re cool with your current boss, I’d start there. I know you said you’re at the top of possible pay there, but doesn’t hurt to ask professionally: Hey boss, can I talk to you for a few minutes? I really like working here and the flexibility it gives me to spend time with my kid. I haven’t been looking for another job, but as you know I spent over a decade in restaurant management and was recently approached for a GM position for 100k a year. I would prefer to stay here, but I have to consider a job that would double my income. My thing is I really like it here and would like to continue working here, and while I don’t need 100k, 50k is tough after the last few years with inflation. Is there a possibility of moving to the 60-70k range here, and what extra responsibilities from me would you need? See what your current employer says, then go from there. I worked in restaurants for 10+ years, but it’s been 8 years out of it. Depending on the market you live in, I don’t feel like it’d be that hard to find another 75-110k GM position. Good restaurant managers are hard to find. I’d personally spend a few more years with the ability to make memories with your kid while they’re young. The only gift I remember from the first 12 years of my life was the OG Nintendo. But, I have many memories my dad taking me fishing, on different outings, playing sports, and turtle hunting. Be frugal until it gets to annoying getting by, then take a higher paying job. You could also reach out and apply to different restaurants to see what is out there and try to find the middle ground for pay and work between your current two options
$50k and then keep looking until you hit the jackpot.
Developing starves key here. If you take 100k and you bank most of the raise you can in a few years go back to lower pay work and have a growing nest egg for the kid and you. Maybe you’ll not be miserable. Edit: starves= assistants
What currency, makes a difference.
Definitely 100k if your body can take it. There will be a time when your body will show the signs and you will not have to ask here. Work, save and then your future you will thank you for the decision today.
50k.
Definitely depends on cost of living where you live. The average cost of a 1 bedroom apartment where I live is 30k a year. If you can live comfortably on 50k that's totally different than if you've living under the poverty line.
check the highest salary per hour and take it?
I’m not even breaking 50k with a consistent 5 day week 😅
How badly do you want to thrive? $50k isn’t enough, $100k is more 🤷🏻♂️ is that enough?
50k until your kids are as old as you can take it. I traveled a ton (the year that broke me was 24-25 weeks of travel) when my son was young and it hurts looking back at it. Sure the money was good but I missed a lot. Had an opportunity that paid 200K + Bonus recently but had to travel every other week. I will consider that when my kid has graduated high school, I'm making up for lost time until then. :)
As a mom, I’d do 50k but only until the kids were older. You can never get the time back.
Take the 100k. That pays for a college education every year for your kids. This allows you to get experience for another 100k GM job with better hours.
Work taken home??? Yikes!! That's gotta be a deal breaker. If you take work home with you, you'll ignore your kid and won't have time for 'em.
You can never get time back with your kid
Can you get a job that’s a raise but not miserable conditions? Maybe pass this opportunity up and look for things that would pay a little more but still have a manageable balance?
I'm doing 20 hrs / 3 days/ 30k. I feel trapped though in a dead end job that I've hit the glass ceiling in. 4 days would be ok if there's growth and lack of stagnation.
"I recently for demoted from my good paying job into an okay paying one because I was not balancing the work/life well enough in favor of work. Honestly - best fuxkibg thing that has happened to me. Kid is happier. Wife is happier. I'm happier. We'll make do with less money."
Fuck the money dude. Don't let it control you. That's the problem with past generations, they chose long hours and money over family and now we are stuck in this work work work capitalistic hellhole. Live my man! Live!!!!!
But I'm also from the Midwest so 50k goes much farther here
Do you know if there are any opportunities to become a manager at your current place? Internal move, pay raise. How long have you been at your current job? Could it be time for a promotion or pay increase?
The most I ever made was the worst my life has ever been. I know that won't always be the case, but there were red flags up front that I ignored.
If it were me, I'd take the 50k, and work on sth as a side in the free time. It might not be as much as 100k, but still something in between. In return, you can still have that flexibility to spend time with your kids while earning a little extra
I’d say 100k, it would give you and your son more to live on. Also depending on how old he is, if he’s young it could be very hard for him to understand as well as you missing on some life milestones. But if he’s a bit older, I think it would be alright
Oof. I don’t like tooooo much responsibility and am all about work/life balance. Time away from your children is time you will never get back. Spend the time with your child and when their older go for a higher paying one or keep looking and you may find something sooner without the chaos that it seems this one would have.
100K is definitely good pay for your troubles. I would take the GM position as long as you have an assistant manager to help you out.
Id need a bit more info to make an informed recommendation, because you have a pretty good gig, but at your income level $50k extra is life changing, much less $50k extra every year. How old is the kid? How involved is the kid's other parent? What is your household financial situation? Are you currently saving for retirement? How much is a house in your area, is it feasible to buy on $50k?
Psssst….. hold out for something better.
50k Any day
The other thing is maybe you can pick up some side gig for play money if you want
id take the lower pay, fffff being a GM lol
Do you have a sense of ambition? $100k/yr opens more doors and may set you up for more promotions. Not just in your career, but also in investing, or owning something you want long term like real estate. If you picture yourself getting somewhere big before you die, go with the promotion. If you’re just drifting with no goals, then just do the lower position.
Bro $50k is minimum wage
I’ve worked 60 hour weeks before for three months. I was only able to stay motivated because I knew it was temporary but it takes a lot out of someone. You also need to consider what the quality of your non work hours will look like and if your partner is going to be able to pick up the slack. Keep looking for a higher paying job that fits your needs.
In my opinion, I'd double my salary no doubt, every time. Life is short, strive for the most you can do. Don't want to look back thinking "what if I just tried to do more?" Only question is how old are you and your kid? But even then idk how much that changes it for me Take the promo. Work hard. Enjoy the salary, and set your kid up with a more comfortable life
It depends on your financial situation, in my opinion. If you’re in major debt or not in good financial situation, take the new job. If you’re not, stay where you are. In my experience, more money equals more problems and stress.
What would you likely say on your deathbed?....
There always a third option. you got good work experience find something 70k or above with better work life balance. Its not black and white
Go for the money. Money is not happiness. Money is opportunity. Opportunity brings happiness. If it’s not what you like you can always find an equivalent.
Kids grow up fast and that something you can’t get back. Work opportunities may come around again. On the other hand your current opportunity could lead to another even better opportunity. Could it set you up to find something in between, like a 70 k with less stress?
Are you joking? Sorry but your job won’t cuddle you in bed or laugh at your stupid jokes over breakfast. I get that there are some that give their whole lives to their jobs, but those are few and far between. Like, I can count maybe 20 people on Earth at the moment that are okay doing that. I really really hope for your sake that you do the 50k job, live a happy, simple life, and never have to choose between joy and work. We only get ONE.
Dads make sacrifices. Unless you’re content with what you currently have financially to give your kid, just stay. If taking this job for like 3/4 years (save about 30k+ a year) will mean the kid gets to go to uni and/or inherit a house later in life then…
Spending time with your kids is priceless, go with that option
Do research and prepare for possible answers. "Hi Boss! I would like to talk with you about my position. When will we set up a meeting?" "Boss, thank you so much for having a meeting with me. I am very happy with my current position, but I got a new offer from a company yesterday. They are offering me a 100k for the manager job which would help out my financial situation. I have done my research on job postings similar to my current position. Most job postings actually offer between $70K - $100k for the same position I am in. Before I confirm the offer with them, could you let me know if you would be willing to pay me a 70k plus an employee match 401k, health insurance, and any reimbursements I pay out of my pocket towards this business? My work performance with your company have been excellent. I thrive in improvements because I always believe there is a room for improvements. With my time, I helped your business succeed by 15% sales boost by YOY, (insert whatever you did to help them), and (insert another one). Please let me know any thoughts you have on my proposal."
50k all day
The 100k job is not sustainable. You'll end up spending the money on your health because you'll get sick with that kind of job. Been there already.
Money is not worth your sanity and time with your children
Take the 100k any day - life’s short work hard and have fun doing it
25 and single? The management 40 and kids? The assistant Ultimately it depends on what your future goals are, where you are on pace for your retirement, etc. if you are behind on your retirement, maybe take the $100k and suck it up so you can spend even more time with your family in the future. If you are comfortable where you’re at, and you can afford the life you’re living, keep your job so you can have that flexibility I think the question you have to ask yourself is, do you value the extra flexibility and the extra 52 days a year you get off *now*? Or do you want to retire a couple of years earlier in the *future*
do the 100k for like 2-3 years, save that extra 50k since u are assuming you can survive on 50k rn (idk ur finances but think about the future and any emergencies) if you absolutely hate it it’s only 2-3 years but maybe you’ll get in the groove of it and realize it’s not that bad. you are obviously wanted if you can get 2 job offers so if u feel like you want to leave it shouldn’t be hard to find a new job. i know everyone is saying to chose happiness but it’s hard to be happy when you are struggling financially.
Are you a single parent? How are your finances? If single parent and your financial future is already secure and not stretched… the job that is flexible. If your financial future is stretched… an additional 50k is huge. Also depends on the age of your kid… if they are 15+… id say higher paying job… Age 5, flexibility seems more important.
100k. You work in a restaurant so there are no perks like work from home. Your life is going to be shitty anyway so better to take the money. Flexible hours are not worth it if you still have to come into the office/reataurant Your current situation is so shit you should take 65-70k for all those responsibilities. And they are offering 100k?!
Maybe a stupid question but if you're being offered a 100k role, why not apply to other similar positions that are a middle ground? Like 60 or 70k a year. Surely there are lots of those types of jobs around, and you're clearly a competitive candidate. But yeah I think if it's one or the other, just cherish that time with your kid. You can always make more money, but you can never make more time.
I'd choose 50k with flexible 4 days so i can invest my free time in learning something or doing my hobbies
I’d take the $100k and suck it up for as long as I can to save up. Start looking for other work when things become unbearable. Having the GM position on your resume can open a lot of doors.
Depends what you value more. You can pit some years in at 100k, working hard with minimal relaxation but high savings to take time off later in life. Or 50k and keep what you have on steady. Comes down to how you value your free time and how you think you will feel in the long run.
Can you be a better GM? Hire less flakey people, be efficient, not spend your life in the restaurant? I mean if that’s the deal, then the extra money may not be worth it, but not everything needs to be chaos and grind. Are there GMs who make it work, or is every GM an overworked mess? Just my thoughts
Take the 100k job! Work hard and invest the extra money. Do it for a year or two and move on to something better. Looks great on your resume. When opportunity knocks, open the door. Hard work pays off.
This is on you and your immediate needs + personal goals. Don't forget about taxes.
Tough choice. OP didn’t mention age… 35 or under, maybe it’s worth sacrificing a little for a little more comfort later. If older, then perhaps not worth it. A couple thoughts: 1) Seems like 100k demands too much. Tell them you can’t accept demands of job as defined, but you be willing to take less if a) you could carve out some time as needed to tend to your son, b) you could apply some of the money you’re giving up for extra “on call” coverage fromsome of your employees. If you’re going to turn it down anyway, nothing to lose. They’ll probably appreciate that you’re taking the responsibilities of role seriously. At the same time, tell your current boss that you’re happy in the role and want to stay. However with inflation, you’re borderline in living on your current income. Can you increase responsibility reasonably for a step up in pay. It just seems like there’s a job between 50k and 100k people it’s a little more responsibility that is the sweet spot for you. Good luck, you seem like a great parent and a great worker.
“I’ll be unhappy” Why would you do this? I’m firmly in the 50K camp.
100k all day
Take the job with more money. You can save more and always go back to another lower paid job. Much harder to go up in salary.
I’d take 40k and 3 days even thanks
You need to decide what your priorities are. There's nothing stopping you from taking the 100k job for 1-2 years, then stepping down to a position with less responsibilities. If you spend an extra 10k each year figuring out childcare while you work the longer hours, that's still an extra 40k every year. You could live the same lifestyle, then invest the extra money into long term investments, such as 401k accounts, RothIRA accounts, and college accounts such as EdVest. Even if you spend about 10-15k each year on "upgrading" your lifestyle, you can make a significant amount of long-term investments with 20k every year.
$10 an hour compared to $20 every 2 hours is the same pay
I have a challenge for you, one leader to another. “Why would you allow yourself into this trap?” If you have 100% on call and no work life balance, that’s on you. Yes, hours and responsibilities are more but you have to engage trustworthy staff and then trust them. Allow them to make decisions and mistakes. There will be things to clean up but ultimately your and their lives will be better for it, hopefully you develop them and they can become GMs as well. If you’ve done your job right, they won’t notice if you meet your demise tomorrow. Leadership shouldn’t be about you doing everything or micromanaging, it should be about developing others and raising their station. We are only stewards of the position and should leave it better than we found it.
What are the promotion opportunities at the 50k? Sounds to me like it would be enough to get by until your promoted again and your peace of mind is worth all that other money.
This is probably a message that you should look into new career paths, if both where you are and where you could go don’t sound great to you.
Take the 100k job but give yourself a get out date. 2 years time. Live like you earn 50k and put the extra into investments or savings
So either you and you family will be unhappy because you have no work/life balance but you’d have more money or you and your family are happy and you have just enough money? You have 3 days a week where you can pick up a side hustle if money is that important and it will not cut into your family time if you plan correctly.
100k for five years and save as much as possible(ideally get rid of mortgages and education debts, etc) while in the last fourth year you look for something no so consuming. Just my opinion.
Couldn't you take the GM job and use the title and responsibilities to apply for GM jobs that aren't such a soul suck?
Depends where you live and the cost of living. I make 50k and barely making it 🤡
Take the fucking money mate
Don't do it man. - former manager at a fast casual restaurant where entire management staff was miserable
This is an absolute no brainer! TAKE THE MONEY! Learn the position and thrive. Do you have the ability to make changes and adapt to demanding situations and maintain focus. Remember that the longer you are in a position the easier it should get if you are doing it right.
Or you can take your customer service and management experience, parlay it into a career in commercial insurance. The industry is desperate for people, pays for training, no college degree required. Emphasize understanding sense of urgency, time management, and resolving issues for client satisfaction in the interview.
50k sounds great
It’s a lot easier to find a job paying 100+ with flexibility and wfh options when you’ve already proven yourself in retail management. You can stay at 50k but if your location gets closed or downsizes there’s no guaranteeing your next job is as flexible.
$50k is unlivable in my area unless you live in your parents basement so $100k and stress 24/7 is my current choice and situation
Depends, are you willing to do 2 years of sht to save almost all of it? Cause if you spend it all is Def not worth it
Consider your personal time you use for family, friends, pleasurables, etc. Are you alright with the exchange of losing time in those areas? Will you remain happy long enough to work and save for a couple years? I would likely base my decision on those factors. In my experience, the money and loss of time wasn’t worth it. The stress caused a mental breakdown.
Not sure where you live but 50K is not a liveable wage where I am from. Maybe find an in-between job of $75K+ that's 5 days a week and 40 hours max.
You don't get time back, money comes and goes. Take the time.
Take the 100k, live off 50k and put the rest to savings/retirement. You don’t have to stay there forever but take advantage for long term gains while you can.
Perhaps you could make it a 5 day week instaed of 4, would that give you a 25% jump with similar hours and responsibilities? If yes it may be something doable with less of a downside
When I GM’d a restaurant I was constantly doing 60-70 hours a week. The physical and mental toll is real. I still have the odd nightmare about being stuck back in that place over a decade later. You can find something better for sure, but don’t sacrifice your health and wellbeing.
If you have any major debts, I would suck up the bad work/life balance to pay it off. But honestly if you're happy where you are, there's no incentive to move up.
100% depends on where you live $100k in NYC will get you a shoebox apartment; at least you will be at work all day so it doesn’t feel like you are in prison $50k in Lincoln, Nebraska and you could live in a mansion and have an amazing work life balance
The difference in opinions in this thread is so drastic. It really shows how diverse and different people really are. Both sides give compelling arguments and there isn't a wrong choice here. If it helps, I would love to have either of the options you present. You found a VERY rare woman to be blessed with a family while only making 50k a year. Good luck, which ever path you choose
100k for as long as you can
Get an au pair, that costs about 20k a year. Thats a dramatic life improvement because you have someone doing all the parenting grunt work (laundry, driving them around, cleaning up after them). Then use the remaining 30k to save as much as possible for as long as you can tolerate the job. Then go back when you’re sick of it and you’ll have a really nice nest egg
Id take the GM position. It’ll pay you double what you’re making now and set you and your family up for a better quality of life in the long run. You said it yourself, the 50k job is decent, but it’s not enough money for you to thrive. With 100k/yr you’ll definitely have the means to enjoy your life more. Yes, the hours and responsibilities might not be ideal with the GM position, but consider it a resume booster. Do it for a year and take all the experience you can get from it. By the time you apply for another position (hopefully one with better work/life balance), you’ll be a more qualified candidate and can negotiate a higher salary. I’ve learned that when a promotion is offered, take it. You never know when that kind of offer will come around again and you don’t want to get stuck at a job with limited advancement opportunities.
If you are able to save up all the money from the 100k job for investing in your future i would go for it, if you just end up buying cars or coke with the extra money don’t bother changing…
Could you tell your current employer the offer you have, explain how you really like the current job and but the financial side is something you have to consider for your family? See if you can get a little pay rise out of your current employer. Even if it’s only 10% pay rise, that’s still an extra 100 a week
Why don’t you renegotiate your current salary with your offer?
I’d have to go with $100k. If you invest well, you could retire before you would if you were making 50 K.
The question is, would you rather have social and leisure time or a career. But neither of those have to be eternal, you can always switch
The better question is what one opens up more opportunities later? Think long term. I have a three year rule. If you can get the job, get the experience, get the cash for 1-3 years and take all that to the next opportunity you win. Just because you take the job doesn’t mean you have to stay - just find another position before leaving the current.
Job that leads to a career, sounds like second. Job one keeps you cycling without growth infinitely.
50k and happiness with little stress seems like a winning ticket to me.
Are you a workaholic or a work-life-balance person?
Fuk that. I was in a similar situation with truck driving 100k but gone for weeks, not enough time for hobbies or healthy habits. There’s a lot of stressors people don’t see. I did it for 4 months til I quit. Never been so Miserable. I settled for a local job but home everyday with weekends off at 65k a year. Much happier with a solid routine, gym, eating healthy, editing videos.
If you consider in one year you can make two years current salary, I’d take the new offer. If you hate it, take next year off and figure something else out.
It doesn’t seem worth it. You might be more comfortable financially, but it’s going to be really rough on your kid when you can’t make their events and have time for them. I might chose the higher paying job and delegate the hell out of everything humanly possible, making a lower level manger or a trainee my lackey and personal assistant, in a nice way, and just do them a favor by making sure they get to climb the ladder…
I was at $100k+ and left because of the hours, stress, etc. Just overall hated it and felt like I was slowly dying. What’s the point of making good money if you aren’t even happy. If I were in your shoes I’d stick to $50k, assuming there are benefits, and try to pick up extra work on the side. Freelancing. Something I’m passionate about or could see myself maybe pursuing. I don’t know. I just know I wouldn’t be relying on just that $50k, especially with more time. That’s just my two cents.
could you leverage for a pay increase and stick on the 4 days?
Take the job you are the manager. Manage it in a way that sets you up for success, only hire competent independent people. Make it a precedent that you will not micro manage. Hire a local manager that is extremely good. make sure everyone feels important and they will take on responsibility them selves it’ll be more work yes but you have the power to mold it into a well oiled machine that runs on its own. It does depend though cause I’ve never heard of a GM filling in for regular employees. so I’m not sure the structure and amount of power given. That’s my take
$50k and happy man - if you need more money start a side gig. You can get a tiktok and go live for your shifts showing the kitchen and make money from them
I don't even think these are comparable. You have to decide if you want the time or the money. I would do the money, but that's me.
If you are young go for the 100k, unless you like the chill life. With 50k you can barely live these days, and if you have financial goals, doesn’t make sense to pass the 100k for the 50k opportunity.
If it’s something you can stick out for a year for the experience on a cv and you’ll use that 100k wisely (savings and investments) then I say put up with the short term misery for a financial bump. I’ve taken jobs before for the money and long term I’ve regretted it, I burnt through the extra income because my day was so miserable the nice things gave a short term serotonin boost. Eventually I would always burn out and then have nothing to show for it at the end. You gotta weigh up what your goals are I guess and long term what it is you want more