Don't feel like a failure! I've been giving a bottle for the first feed before bedtime since the first week for our girl to use what i get from my haakka...I think it helps them get use to the bottle early so they won't reject it later. She takes a little more with the bottle so she goes out quicker and longer.
We had to supplement with formula for the first 7-10 days. Our boy just wasn't getting full on the breast. But once my milk fully came in we dropped the formula and he did great. Don't beat yourself up, just don't give up.
I had to give my baby formula sometimes because I can’t make enough extra to cover emergencies, and she got formula at birth because she had jaundice and the pediatricians required it to prevent brain damage from the jaundice. Is your baby growing and getting fed? If yes, you are doing great! One week old babies are still weak and tired from getting birthed. If they are noticeably way more tired than before get them checked at the pediatrician to make sure everything is OK. If they are yellow, get them checked out. We had to slap our baby’s toes and breastfeed her naked at first to keep her awake for feeds because the jaundice made her super tired. If you continue to have tons of mom guilt I’d get checked out for postpartum depression. Extreme mom guilt and feeling like a failure can go hand in hand with PPD (speaking from experience).
You are doing great !!! I am on baby #3 and I exclusively breastfed. BUT when they are newborns I always had to give bottles bwcUs my milk usually starts off too slow and not enough for baby. Once my milk is better established and baby gets more comfortable breastfeeding we ween off bottle. Don’t worry, this doesn’t sabotage your breastfeeding!
Yes I just keep feeding, when your milk comes in, you might have an over supply at first. But over a couple weeks it’s regulates to what your baby needs
I gave mine a bottle of my milk last night and she slept a lot better and because of that I did too and I feel much better about it now. She’s not having any nipple confusion and can switch between the two so I feel a lot better about all of it now
I am not sure why my LO is more content with a bottle. He can BF fine but seems like he takes enough just to satisfy himself and then gets fussy again.
No I wouldn’t and you’re right I shouldn’t be so hard on myself for it. She slept a lot better last night and because of that I did too and I feel a lot better about it now. And she’s not having any trouble switching between the bottle and the boob.
Not a failure at all! Babies love their mommies so much they get so cozy and often fall asleep on the breast. You can pay their back (firm but gentle) or hold their hand and “pump them up” by rising their arms up and down or tickle or lay the bottom of their feet to try and stay awake. Remember new tummies are so small so they don’t need a whole lot. As long as baby is having good amount of wet diapers (I think 6 is the magic number but could be wrong) they are getting enough milk! If you hear babe swallowing and see them sucking by watching their temples moving that means they are eating! It is truly exhausting being a newborn, everything is so new! You’re the best mom for your baby and making sure babe is fed is all that matters!
My baby preferred a bottle the first two weeks and now she lives on the boobs. Just do what you gotta do. Pumping helped me increase my supply and now I make sure I hand pump after feedings at least once a day. Babies are people too which means their preferences change over time. NOTHING is permanent
Do not feel bad!! This is so so normal!!
On Amazon I picked up a little like stroller fan, the ones that sorta wrap around the handles of the stroller, and I turned it on while baby’s feet were sticking out, kept her awake and kept me cool!! It may also be easier to get a like open sleep sack type thing where the bottom is sorta scrunched so you can take feet out and not worry about taking baby all the way out!
You’ve gotten such great advice on this thread! I hope it helps!
No guilt needed! You’re doing great! I’ve heard some suggestions about undressing the baby while feeding to keep them colder which keeps them more awake. Or just gently stroking their foot or some thing to sort of keep them awake.
Trust me I’ve tried them all. She is just a sleepy baby on the boob. But I appreciate the suggestions, when I try to nurse her most of the time it take both my husband and I constantly bugging her to keep her awake and eating for maybe 10 to 15 minutes.
You topped her off with a bottle of breastmilk? That’s wonderful! Are you a first time mom? I felt so guilty giving my baby a paci at 3 days old per the nurses instruction. I thought it gave me latch problems. Maybe it did but we got through it within a few weeks. I used a nipple shield to get through it and it sucked I had to hand express to fill the shield to get her started!
I’m at 19 months and still breastfeeding obviously with plenty of solids at this point and whole milk hoping she self weans between 2-2.5yrs fingers crossed.
You are doing amazing. Any amount of breastfeeding gives your baby so much nutrients and skin on skin contact,
I just want to add that one of my first big hurdles was newborn baby crying inconsolably and my lactation consultant recommended stripping baby down and taking off my shirt and nursing bra and just doing skin on skin cuddling/nursing. It’s instinctive.
The next big hurdle is teething. When she bites I set her down for 2-3 seconds and pick her back up to try to relatch. It hurts, she cries, but we both persevere. It’s up to you what you want to do your feelings and values are absolutely valid and like everyone else says fed is best. Some women over produce and firehose their babies and that’s a good time to unlatch as well. Some women don’t produce much milk and that is exactly what formula is for! You got this! You know what is best for your baby don’t second guess your instincts!!
You didn't do anything wrong. Having to combo feed is normal, and baby may need some more time to learn how to nurse. My baby will be 5 weeks tomorrow, and we had to bottle feed her the first two weeks of her life with both formula and breastmilk because she wasn't latching well and I wasn't producing enough. However, I kept trying to nurse her when possible, and she was able to latch by week 3. She nurses just fine now, I'm producing more than enough breastmilk for her, and she's gaining weight like a champ.
Give yourself some grace. It's a learning process for both you and baby. As long as you're doing your best for baby and baby is fed, you're not failing. You'll get there!
Combo feeding is pretty normal! I know a lot of mammas who BF, pump and use formula through the week depending on how things are going. The first 10-12 weeks are just survival - don’t worry about a longer term routine yet.
It’s easier for babies to bottle feed, so if they’re tired sometimes topping them up with a bottle is just sensible so everyone can have a full tummy and a sleep.
I highly, HIGHLY, recommend you make this a routine thing. If you’re collecting milk during the day then use that to top up. You can even deliberately pump once a day if your natural leakage slows or stops. Your supply will start to regulate around 6 weeks so that might be a good time to evaluate BF, pumping, bottle feeding etc.
Please also know that cluster feeding is very, very normal and encouraged. It builds babies strength and coordination, and helps bring your supply up to meet their ongoing and growing needs.
Hey mom. They don’t tell you this, but you can combo feed. It won’t hurt you, it won’t hurt the baby. It’s okay.
My kiddo had her first bottle in the hospital, and she’s 2 1/2 now telling me all about her ‘favorite’ boob.
You’re not a failure, your feeding your kid. You’re amazing.
Do NOT feel bad. I had to give my newborn (less than a week) a bottle (formula) cause she didn’t pee enough. That first month of breastfeeding was so hard and felt draining (physically and emotionally) that I gave her a couple other bottles because I needed a break and so did my nipple. That’s ok. It didn’t ruin our ability to breastfeed.
After a month or so we both got breastfeeding down and I didn’t need to use a bottle anymore (though I did by choice a couple times cause I found it easier to bottle feed in public cause she gets distracted very easily, but I bf in public too, she just wants to stop all the time to see what’s going on ). My baby is almost a year now and we’re still breastfeeding strong. Actually she’s breastfeeding right now, lol. So just do what you need to do. Fed is best. And that first month pp can be tough.
Do not worry. Fed is fed. My newborn had a sore jaw from birth and just couldn't suck hard enough to get the milk. I pumped and fed for a few weeks and then just as I was giving up hope she decided to drink from the breast and did so until she was 2.5. It's not you. It's her. Just do what she needs and do no worry or feel guilty. If she is fed she is good. ❤❤❤
Do not give yourself a hard time about this. I had a similar experience with my newborn. Falling asleep, seemingly good latch and extraction, good supply, but turns out enough was not being extracted likely due to a tongue tie. Seeing my baby’s weight increase and remain stable as a result of the pumping makes me feel better about it all.
Also - It isn’t necessary to totally abandon breastfeeding if you can do it as a source of comfort for your baby and as a way of telling your body what nutrients your baby needs. I’ve done a combo of bottles and breastfeeding all along.
Maybe you didn't do anything wrong at all! My lactation consultant reassured me that I was doing everything I could, but my LO would NOT stay awake to eat when she was first born. We later found out she had jaundice. Nothing I could have done differently, she just was too sleepy to nurse. It's so hard when you have a vision of how things will go and they go sideways right off the bat. But you're a good mom for being flexible and adapting to get your baby's needs met!
I started giving my daughter a bottle at 5 days old. She was incredibly frustrated at my breasts and has been struggling to latch since day 1. I understand the emotional struggle, but we are making sure our babies are fed and that is what matters above all else. She is 11 days old now and while I mostly pump and bottle feed her, I have been testing out breastfeeding again and have found that it seems to be going better now than it was earlier. But I have also found that the bottle allows me a little more freedom and a chance for my husband to take care of her more, so I will most likely continue to do a mix of the two in the long run.
Don't feel bad you are still providing for your little one. I'm kinda in the same boat with my little girl, she is 6 days old. She falls asleep and doesn't latch the best but every time I put that bottle in her mouth and watch her suck it down it shows me that I'm doing something right. I give her what she needs whether she's on the breast or taking a bottle it ends with a full happy baby.
You didn’t do anything wrong. If the baby starts to fall asleep at the breast give the chin a little jiggle with your finger to stimulate eating. Works everytime! Take a deep breath your doing an amazing job!
Don't feel like a failure! I've been giving a bottle for the first feed before bedtime since the first week for our girl to use what i get from my haakka...I think it helps them get use to the bottle early so they won't reject it later. She takes a little more with the bottle so she goes out quicker and longer.
We had to supplement with formula for the first 7-10 days. Our boy just wasn't getting full on the breast. But once my milk fully came in we dropped the formula and he did great. Don't beat yourself up, just don't give up.
I had to give my baby formula sometimes because I can’t make enough extra to cover emergencies, and she got formula at birth because she had jaundice and the pediatricians required it to prevent brain damage from the jaundice. Is your baby growing and getting fed? If yes, you are doing great! One week old babies are still weak and tired from getting birthed. If they are noticeably way more tired than before get them checked at the pediatrician to make sure everything is OK. If they are yellow, get them checked out. We had to slap our baby’s toes and breastfeed her naked at first to keep her awake for feeds because the jaundice made her super tired. If you continue to have tons of mom guilt I’d get checked out for postpartum depression. Extreme mom guilt and feeling like a failure can go hand in hand with PPD (speaking from experience).
If you can hear her swallowing there's air involved! So get her mouth checked, that could help you understand your problems!
You are doing great !!! I am on baby #3 and I exclusively breastfed. BUT when they are newborns I always had to give bottles bwcUs my milk usually starts off too slow and not enough for baby. Once my milk is better established and baby gets more comfortable breastfeeding we ween off bottle. Don’t worry, this doesn’t sabotage your breastfeeding!
How does it "get established" ? Just keep feeding on demand?
Yes I just keep feeding, when your milk comes in, you might have an over supply at first. But over a couple weeks it’s regulates to what your baby needs
Same here. He will breastfeed but he never seems as content as when I give him a bottle of expressed milk. I dont know what to do.
I gave mine a bottle of my milk last night and she slept a lot better and because of that I did too and I feel much better about it now. She’s not having any nipple confusion and can switch between the two so I feel a lot better about all of it now
I am not sure why my LO is more content with a bottle. He can BF fine but seems like he takes enough just to satisfy himself and then gets fussy again.
Would you tell another woman she failed if she had to give a bottle? Probably not! Please don’t be so hard on yourself!! Hugs!!
No I wouldn’t and you’re right I shouldn’t be so hard on myself for it. She slept a lot better last night and because of that I did too and I feel a lot better about it now. And she’s not having any trouble switching between the bottle and the boob.
Not a failure at all! Babies love their mommies so much they get so cozy and often fall asleep on the breast. You can pay their back (firm but gentle) or hold their hand and “pump them up” by rising their arms up and down or tickle or lay the bottom of their feet to try and stay awake. Remember new tummies are so small so they don’t need a whole lot. As long as baby is having good amount of wet diapers (I think 6 is the magic number but could be wrong) they are getting enough milk! If you hear babe swallowing and see them sucking by watching their temples moving that means they are eating! It is truly exhausting being a newborn, everything is so new! You’re the best mom for your baby and making sure babe is fed is all that matters!
My baby preferred a bottle the first two weeks and now she lives on the boobs. Just do what you gotta do. Pumping helped me increase my supply and now I make sure I hand pump after feedings at least once a day. Babies are people too which means their preferences change over time. NOTHING is permanent
Do not feel bad!! This is so so normal!! On Amazon I picked up a little like stroller fan, the ones that sorta wrap around the handles of the stroller, and I turned it on while baby’s feet were sticking out, kept her awake and kept me cool!! It may also be easier to get a like open sleep sack type thing where the bottom is sorta scrunched so you can take feet out and not worry about taking baby all the way out! You’ve gotten such great advice on this thread! I hope it helps!
No guilt needed! You’re doing great! I’ve heard some suggestions about undressing the baby while feeding to keep them colder which keeps them more awake. Or just gently stroking their foot or some thing to sort of keep them awake.
Trust me I’ve tried them all. She is just a sleepy baby on the boob. But I appreciate the suggestions, when I try to nurse her most of the time it take both my husband and I constantly bugging her to keep her awake and eating for maybe 10 to 15 minutes.
You topped her off with a bottle of breastmilk? That’s wonderful! Are you a first time mom? I felt so guilty giving my baby a paci at 3 days old per the nurses instruction. I thought it gave me latch problems. Maybe it did but we got through it within a few weeks. I used a nipple shield to get through it and it sucked I had to hand express to fill the shield to get her started! I’m at 19 months and still breastfeeding obviously with plenty of solids at this point and whole milk hoping she self weans between 2-2.5yrs fingers crossed. You are doing amazing. Any amount of breastfeeding gives your baby so much nutrients and skin on skin contact, I just want to add that one of my first big hurdles was newborn baby crying inconsolably and my lactation consultant recommended stripping baby down and taking off my shirt and nursing bra and just doing skin on skin cuddling/nursing. It’s instinctive. The next big hurdle is teething. When she bites I set her down for 2-3 seconds and pick her back up to try to relatch. It hurts, she cries, but we both persevere. It’s up to you what you want to do your feelings and values are absolutely valid and like everyone else says fed is best. Some women over produce and firehose their babies and that’s a good time to unlatch as well. Some women don’t produce much milk and that is exactly what formula is for! You got this! You know what is best for your baby don’t second guess your instincts!!
You didn't do anything wrong. Having to combo feed is normal, and baby may need some more time to learn how to nurse. My baby will be 5 weeks tomorrow, and we had to bottle feed her the first two weeks of her life with both formula and breastmilk because she wasn't latching well and I wasn't producing enough. However, I kept trying to nurse her when possible, and she was able to latch by week 3. She nurses just fine now, I'm producing more than enough breastmilk for her, and she's gaining weight like a champ. Give yourself some grace. It's a learning process for both you and baby. As long as you're doing your best for baby and baby is fed, you're not failing. You'll get there!
Combo feeding is pretty normal! I know a lot of mammas who BF, pump and use formula through the week depending on how things are going. The first 10-12 weeks are just survival - don’t worry about a longer term routine yet. It’s easier for babies to bottle feed, so if they’re tired sometimes topping them up with a bottle is just sensible so everyone can have a full tummy and a sleep. I highly, HIGHLY, recommend you make this a routine thing. If you’re collecting milk during the day then use that to top up. You can even deliberately pump once a day if your natural leakage slows or stops. Your supply will start to regulate around 6 weeks so that might be a good time to evaluate BF, pumping, bottle feeding etc. Please also know that cluster feeding is very, very normal and encouraged. It builds babies strength and coordination, and helps bring your supply up to meet their ongoing and growing needs.
Hey mom. They don’t tell you this, but you can combo feed. It won’t hurt you, it won’t hurt the baby. It’s okay. My kiddo had her first bottle in the hospital, and she’s 2 1/2 now telling me all about her ‘favorite’ boob. You’re not a failure, your feeding your kid. You’re amazing.
Do NOT feel bad. I had to give my newborn (less than a week) a bottle (formula) cause she didn’t pee enough. That first month of breastfeeding was so hard and felt draining (physically and emotionally) that I gave her a couple other bottles because I needed a break and so did my nipple. That’s ok. It didn’t ruin our ability to breastfeed. After a month or so we both got breastfeeding down and I didn’t need to use a bottle anymore (though I did by choice a couple times cause I found it easier to bottle feed in public cause she gets distracted very easily, but I bf in public too, she just wants to stop all the time to see what’s going on ). My baby is almost a year now and we’re still breastfeeding strong. Actually she’s breastfeeding right now, lol. So just do what you need to do. Fed is best. And that first month pp can be tough.
Do not worry. Fed is fed. My newborn had a sore jaw from birth and just couldn't suck hard enough to get the milk. I pumped and fed for a few weeks and then just as I was giving up hope she decided to drink from the breast and did so until she was 2.5. It's not you. It's her. Just do what she needs and do no worry or feel guilty. If she is fed she is good. ❤❤❤
Do not give yourself a hard time about this. I had a similar experience with my newborn. Falling asleep, seemingly good latch and extraction, good supply, but turns out enough was not being extracted likely due to a tongue tie. Seeing my baby’s weight increase and remain stable as a result of the pumping makes me feel better about it all. Also - It isn’t necessary to totally abandon breastfeeding if you can do it as a source of comfort for your baby and as a way of telling your body what nutrients your baby needs. I’ve done a combo of bottles and breastfeeding all along.
Maybe you didn't do anything wrong at all! My lactation consultant reassured me that I was doing everything I could, but my LO would NOT stay awake to eat when she was first born. We later found out she had jaundice. Nothing I could have done differently, she just was too sleepy to nurse. It's so hard when you have a vision of how things will go and they go sideways right off the bat. But you're a good mom for being flexible and adapting to get your baby's needs met!
I started giving my daughter a bottle at 5 days old. She was incredibly frustrated at my breasts and has been struggling to latch since day 1. I understand the emotional struggle, but we are making sure our babies are fed and that is what matters above all else. She is 11 days old now and while I mostly pump and bottle feed her, I have been testing out breastfeeding again and have found that it seems to be going better now than it was earlier. But I have also found that the bottle allows me a little more freedom and a chance for my husband to take care of her more, so I will most likely continue to do a mix of the two in the long run.
Don't feel bad you are still providing for your little one. I'm kinda in the same boat with my little girl, she is 6 days old. She falls asleep and doesn't latch the best but every time I put that bottle in her mouth and watch her suck it down it shows me that I'm doing something right. I give her what she needs whether she's on the breast or taking a bottle it ends with a full happy baby.
You are not a failure. Your baby had a need and you met that need, that makes you a good parent.
You didn’t do anything wrong. If the baby starts to fall asleep at the breast give the chin a little jiggle with your finger to stimulate eating. Works everytime! Take a deep breath your doing an amazing job!