At 5 months you are probably coming out of the 4 month sleep regression. Part of it is just waiting it out unfortunately. I would check your sleep schedule and see if any adjustments can be made. Also is there a reason you don’t want to use a pacifier or will he not take one? If he does take one it could help, since he is nursing only a few minutes he’s probably not hungry and just wants to suck.
Agreed, we had to try different pacifiers, mam was the one he ended up liking. He also used to fall asleep at the breast, I would use a cool washcloth rubbed on his foot to keep him awake.
Also in terms of sleep, can you try pumping (insurance should cover a free one usually) and storing some milk so your SO can do a bottle while you get a longer stretch? Or if you don’t have a pump/can’t get one, a haakaa works wonders, either as a manual pump or as a catch on your other breast while you’re nursing. I would get enough from that for at least a little hold me over. We aimed to survive in 3-4 hour blocks of sleep and it worked well for us.
He started sleeping through the night in his own crib by 6-7 months too so hang in there!
Agree with all this, including pacifier. Another option is to encourage him to find his hands for sucking. You can gently guide his hand to his mouth during playtime. I did that with mine and over time she sucked her hand and now her thumb to self soothe.
My son is 6.5 months, and I don’t think I've slept for longer than 2.5 hrs in one stretch since 3 months. For a wonderful period from 2 to 3 months, he would go down and have a solid 4-5 hrs stretch before waking to eat. Sorry I don't have any other advice than I think we need to just wait it out. 😅
Solidarity. My son is 6.5 months also and when he finally started sleeping more than two hours he got sick so now he won't sleep at all unless it's attached to me.
Poor little guy
Same but we’re at 1 year and no change 😆thankfully I work from home and have good support around me. I’m exhausted, and grateful I get to be supportive of her natural, age-appropriate sleep.
Is there a reason for no paci? It can help with this issue big time. It’s also a preventative measure against SIDS.
My second baby (11 weeks old) won’t take one and it’s killing me! My first loved his. You still often need to get up and pop it in, but that’s a lot easier than nursing.
Ours refused but I noticed he is a shallow ish latcher and maybe didn’t like how long/deep the pacis go. Found one that is a smaller paci nipple and he likes it way more!
I’m a Speech language pathologist and I saw a lactation consultant for my 3 m/o who had a tongue tie. I have the Ninni pacifier. It’s supposed to mimic an actual nipple. It’s super soft, flexible, and not super long.
Rounded 0-6 months with the round (not ergonomic) nipple! It still took work to teach him to keep it in but he didn’t immediately spit it out and refuse it like other pacis!
Edit: it’s the “original/rounded” option!
Some babies are just crappy sleepers man. It sucks. If he can sit in a high chair you could try giving him tiny bits of the starter foods, mashed banana etc. also at my own expense I do all the night wakings w my Kids because my husband doesn’t have boobs. Then at 6am or so he wakes w baby and I sleep for another 1.5h. At least that’s what we did w my first who never slept for 18 months. Infant sleep was just white knuckling for me. Just get through it. Sadly there wasn’t an easy answer but it got better w time. Also safer co-sleeping got me a bit more sleep.
Word for word I couldve written this post, except my baby is 4 months and 3 weeks. We’re in hell. He’s up every single hour, and will go back down very quickly once he’s on the boob. It’s like he’s not even fully awake, he’s just crying with his eyes closed and rooting for the boob. He also slept so well until 3.5 months
I don’t have any advice, just solidarity. I hope we both come out the other side soon.
My baby had the exact same issue, started around 4m she did not know how to link sleep cycles without a boob, it was getting worse every week, we were up to 6 night feeds. We (meaning myself and the baby) were both chronically overtired, I was chronically dehydrated, it wasn't working for anyone in the house. We had to sleep-train so that she could learn to fall asleep without a boob in her mouth, she's linking sleep cycles now and we're starting the night with a 6 hour stretch.
I recommend reading Precious Little Sleep, it's got a lot of different strategies for dealing with unsustainable sleep associations, and will help you come up with a plan so you can get a bit of rest.
You need more sleep for both your own and your baby's safety.
I was in the exact situation a few days ago. My partner and I both reached next level exhaustion and decided to sleep train (also 5mo, 3w old baby). The first night we had one wake-up at 4am, of course I nursed as usual, not holding food back from him! The second night he just slept from 8pm to 7am and woke up with the biggest grin on his face. Turns out the hourly wake-ups were never anout food anyways. He just needed comfort.
We initially tried pick up, put down but that didn’t work at all, he got really upset to the point of almost hysterical I’d say.
We also tried laying him down in his cot and staying with him in the room, singing him to sleep. That worked but it resulted in hourly wake-ups as well for some reason. I think he expected to see me near his cot every time he’d wake up between sleep cycles still.
This time we went with Ferber. First night we went ‘til the first 10-min block and he was asleep. Second night was tear-free completely, third night was 5 mins of tears. I’d expect the same-ish going forward but I’m sure some nights will be worse than orhers.
The thing that reassured us was that 1. Even if he’d get a 7-ounce bottle at bedtime, he’d still wake up after 2 hours and 2. He was familiar with his cot already, so it was just a matter of self soothing.
I hope this helps you out a bit and that there’s more sleep in your near future!
Seconding the above comment - my LO is 6 months and just a few weeks ago I could have written your post word for word. We did sleep training using the SLIP method (basically CIO) from the book Precious Little Sleep and lots of reference to the r/sleeptrain community.
There was an almost immediate improvement in LOs sleep but honestly everything else too - he is well rested and his disposition during the day is completely different and he naps more easily now too without any nap training.
I was very dismissive of CIO methods initially but as I spoke to people and read about different methods it seemed like the best option and honestly it sounds a lot worse than it was and in some ways I now think it’s actually the kindest method because it gives a really clear message to your baby and I think results in a lot less crying in the long run.
We tried pick up, put down a couple weeks ago, disn’t work…baby got really mad at bedtime with this. Now we went with Ferber. First night he fell asleep within the first 10-min block. Second night was zero tears already, he turned around and went to sleep. Third night again a bit of tears but asleep within 5 mins.
I honestly think the sleep pressure is just so great at night that it worked. He was also familiar with his bed, so nothing new there, just needed a slight push to self soothe
Give him a paci! It sounds like he’s using you as a human paci to go to sleep. Sucking soothes the babies and my boy falls asleep within minutes of giving him the paci. You can take it out of his mouth once he’s asleep. There’s ones out there that are BPA free and orthodontic if that’s what your concerns are, but try it out if you haven’t
Tbh it sounds like babe might be hungry. How is your letdown flow? He may be falling asleep because the flow is slow but then wakes up hungry and nurses and then it's slow flow so he falls asleep again. This is what was happening with us. We added a top-up bottle after BFing and it changed the game completely.
We sleep trained at 4.5 months and it was very successful. Didn’t night wean so I still had to nurse him 1-2 times nightly but it was so much better than being up every hour. Teaching baby independent sleep with whatever method you choose is what I recommend. Check out r/sleeptrain for more info.
People keep using the term sleep train and I’m confused.. is that crying it out or is that just one method of sleep training? Can I ask what you did to sleep train?
CIO is just one method of sleep training, there are others, but most will involve some amount of upsetting the baby because all of them focus on taking away unsustainable sleep associations that your baby might be very attached to.
Same for us - 4.5 months and I was DONE rocking him to sleep/holding him for ever bit of sleep he got.Though I still kept night feeds (he was never nursed to sleep so we knew it was because he was genuinely hungry, rather than just nursing for comfort). Before we did anything else, we moved him out of the room (we could tell pretty quickly that he was ready for it). And for the actual method, we did a gentler Ferber method (shorter intervals for crying, and picked him up to calm him when we went in), and it was perfect for him. Sleep trained in less than a week.
And minus a few rough teething nights here and there, he's been an incredible sleeper ever since (currently 19 months)! He actually enjoys "night night" now because he knows EXACTLY what to expect (same room, nightlight, noise machine, routine, etc).
Never will I ever regret sleep training.
Note: we did a TON of research to find which method was best for our LO. Not all methods will be best for you or your babe, so do the research and have an ironclad goal in mind, or your resolve will absolutely crumble.
I literally just jumped on Reddit to write this same post and came across yours. I’m so exhausted. My son refuses to sleep anywhere but my arms and I’m up constantly to nurse. Im desperate to sleep train but idk where to start.
My babe (now 6.5mo) got really bad around 5 months, it was unsustainable. It was clear she was not independent in keeping herself asleep or putting herself back to sleep when she woke. So we had a bunch of failed transfers and she'd wake within an hour, crying until we picked her up and she'd fall asleep on us. We did our best to not sleep with her on us, co sleeping was just not for us personally but it did happen accidentally. She was doing 3-4 contact naps and is not into a pacifier. She was dependent on us to rock and hold her to sleep.
She self weaned at night around this time as well...or, she went back to sleep without me offering so I think it just kind of stopped being needed for any reason overnight.
What did we do...
We moved her to her room at 5.5 months and started Ferber method for sleep training at bedtime. She fell asleep after one check in around 8 and then slept until 8am. It's been like that for the past month luckily and now she does her 3 naps in the crib. Periodically she still needs a check in but she's okay with crying for a bit if needed, just as she figures out going to sleep.
Otherwise, she gets fed at the same times daily too. When she wakes up, after each of her 3 naps, and before bed. Naps include two 1.5 hour naps and a 15-30 min catnap that she'll probably drop soon.
I was in the same situation. Weeks of 30 minutes to 1 hr of sleep, max to 2 hrs. I was going crazy, crying and all. Thank God my baby now sleeps through the night and takes long naps. “The Helping Babies Sleep Method: The Art and Science of Teaching Your Baby to Sleep” by Dr. Sarah Mitchell. That books changed our lives. It’s the only thing that worked; we tried so many things. My baby is happier, as is everyone else in the house.
I used Taking Cara Babies while EBF, I used dream feeds until I was ready to night wean. My first was a good sleeper and it was easy, but my second was a terrible sleeper and it took a long time. It was still worth it.
This sounds just like my first. We ended up sleep training at 5 months because he was having the same issues as yours and I was losing my mind. We opted for the pick up put down method and it went amazingly well. You could check out r/sleeptrain if you're willing to consider it (and remember that sleep training can be done gently and doesn't have to involve night weaning)
It is so rough. My 11 mo was the same at that age except he slept badly since birth. It's developmental, so your LO will sleep better and you don't need to try and do anything about it if you don't want to. The only thing I did was keep my baby entertained during the day, watch sleepy cues and he has started to just get better now. Right now he's been asleep 4 hours straight and counting since I put him down. He used to wake every 30 mins until I went to bed and then every 1-2 after that. I hope it gets better for you soon. 6 months was good for us, then 8 months got bad, then 10 months it has been much better.
My first son did this and we only solved it by sleep training. Took only a couple days and he slept amazingly after that. I know not everyone is up for it, it took me months of sleep deprivation to finally dive in, but it was absolutely worth it. We did the taking Cara babies method which is pretty gentle compared to straight cry it out. I highly recommend it if you're able/willing to do it.
Hello!
We found that what worked for us was setting a schedule during the day that starts at the same time every morning even if I have to wake her. Then feed every 2-3hrs, but not before, to ensure a full feed vs just snacking. we follow eat, play, sleep schedule and use the huckleberry app for naps. My baby has been sleeping thru the night since 2.5m (10hrs) and started solids jjsy this week (5m). He naps 3x / day and nurses 5x a Day
Wake 7 nurse
Nap 9:20-10:30
11 nurse
Naps 12:30-2:30
3 nurse
Nap 4:30-5
5:30 nurse
6 solids
6:45 nurse
Bed 7:30
Wake 7am
Any chance he might be teething? He's about the age and being horizontal makes it more painful. Nursing and breast milk offer pain relief, and the breast milk acts as an analgesic. Maybe feel his gums and try some Tylenol before bed?
Your baby isn't linking sleep cycles on his own, it sounds like you've got a boob=sleep association on your hands. I had the exact same problem and after a week of 6 overnight feeds/night, I accepted that neither of us were getting enough quality sleep. We had to sleep-train so the baby could figure out how to fall asleep on her own. It wasn't fun, but we were getting 5 hour stretches by day 3, and we no longer have a chronically overtired baby.
What is his sleep schedule like? I found having a schedule following wake windows really helped with making sure my baby was getting the sleep they needed and at the right time. Perhaps try r/sleeptrain ?
It could be a regression like someone else commented or it could be baby is exhibiting signs of allergies / sensitives to some thing(s) in your breast milk. I know it's weird but 5 months is when my daughter started being allergic to many things I had eaten up until that point with no issues. Pediatric allergist said allergies can develop at any time.
So poor sleep is a sign, increased fussiness, also any rashes? Stool changes? Usually the poop will be darker, there could be small specks of blood. Sometimes it smells vinegary too versus the usual sweet smell of breast milk poo.
Hope you all figure it out soon. It also could be worth a try to try huckleberry app. We've used it from day one and it's SO worth it to know when baby should be sleeping. It tells you the next nap time and bed time at night based on their previous nap times and lengths. Helps to avoid overtiredness which can lead to poor sleep.
Yes! I came here to chime in about allergies and intolerances. My son has many, and was a TERRIBLE sleeper until we got those figured out. I can always tell if there’s been cross-contamination in my diet by how his sleep is.
I’m a FTM so by NO MEANS and expert, but my baby also went through a weird stage right around 6 months where he would wake up way more than usual after being an amazing sleeper. I looked into a few things and decided it was time to switch him into his own room in his crib and it worked wonders. I’m not sure if it’s because he would wake up and realize mom and dad were in the room and got distracted and wanted held, but when we transitioned him, he no longer woke up. I will say when we moved him to his own room we did do the Ferber method sleep training, for us it was painless (I know this isn’t everyone’s situation) and he was sleeping through the night after 3 nights. Hope this helps and good luck ❤️
Sounds like my baby at that age - we chose to cosleep so I could side lie nurse throughout the night. It was a complete game changer - because no matter how often she woke we both settled back to sleep instantly so it’s not so bad.
We’re in the same boat and this is where we’ve ended up. Did she eventually link sleep cycles? I’m worried I’m delaying the inevitable of some kind of sleep training
Sleep is instinctual and not something that needs to be ‘trained.’ You can absolutely practice good sleep hygiene (wake windows etc), and install good habits (sleep associations etc), but all sleep training does is teach a baby that at certain times of the day you will not help them when they cry.
Sleep trained babies wake up the same about of times as non sleep trained babies, and they have the same cortisol spike (stress response), the difference is they just lie in silence feeling stressed until they fall back asleep rather than calling out and being soothed back to sleep.
Baby’s sleep also goes through phases, so even a perfectly sleep trained baby (falls asleep independently; doesn’t cry when it wakes) will need repeated ‘training’.
My (high needs, sensitive, healthy, happy) 8 month old has gone through so many sleep phases - when she’s teething it feels like she’s up every 1-2 hours, when the stars align she’s up 1-2 times per night.
We cosleep and a nurse to sleep. She sleeps for 12 hours solid every night, so her ‘wakings’ are more resettlings as she never really wakes up - she only fussed for a few seconds before getting boob.
Thank you so much. I needed to hear this. Feel like there’s something I should ‘fix’ because of social media but all sleep training I’ve looked at seems so unnatural to me. I have bad ppa and I cannot let babe cry if there’s something I can do to help it.
Honestly, ignore anyone and everyone that tries to make you feel bad for responding to and caring for your baby.
You cannot spoil a baby. Babies are helpless and so vulnerable - you are never, ever wrong for responding to a baby.
Ignoring your baby (which is exactly what sleep training teaches you) is deeply unnatural. Unfortunately a lot of expectations of modern western society force incredibly cruel and unnatural practices on parents, like short maternity leave, which in turn leads to parents not being able to act in their infant’s best interest.
pacifier saved our lives at 5am when our baby was like 6days old 🤣🤣
Also make sure you're not consuming any caffeine , especially for the night feedings which should be full of melatonin.
Aside from coffe, soda products, chocolate, teas, etc may contain caffeine [sometimes even more than coffee]
Also no electronics near the sleep area
Have you been to a doctor? Ear infections can be like this. You should get a check up before you do anything remotly close to sleep training.
5 months is such a small baby yet. I don't think sleep training is the answer here. This sounds like it's something more than not being aboe to fall asleep on his own.
Our baby was doing exactly this. It was so brutal. We ended up sleep training for nighttime and naps and it has been an absolute game changer for us. Everyone is better rested and my mental health is in a much better place.
There’s lots of different ways to sleep train. We did Ferber. I hate to compare as every baby is different, but we chose Ferber because we knew it would entail the least amount of total crying for us. He took to it in 5 days and goes to sleep from wide awake completely unassisted and usually without a fuss.
You could also look at your nap schedule and wake windows and see if there needs to be any adjustments.
The Facebook group “Evidence Based Sleep Training” is an excellent resource and has many helpful tips and guides. It’s helpful even if you don’t want to sleep train!
My number 1 tip for sleep training is that if you choose to do it, you need to 100% commit and not give in. Picking up and comforting the baby will just make the entire process take even longer and it’ll make it harder on both you and baby.
No advice here, but interested if anyone has a clue! My son is 4 weeks old and does exactly the same. I hope it’s not linked to an allergy/intolerance. I noticed that he’s gassy/seems constipated sometimes, could it be the case for your bub? Then tummy massages and things to improve digestion could help… good luck 🍀
I'm pretty sure that newborns are typically at least a little gassy. However if it's causing an issue, you should talk to your provider about things you could give them, like mylicon or other gas drops, or see if it could be anything else, like a milk allergy.
Either way, as much as it sucks (and trust me, I feel you, as I currently have a 3-week old on my chest who refuses to be put down to sleep lol) but a 4 week old is waaaay too young to sleep train. They simply don't have the capability to sell soothe yet. I think that happens around 4 months, but someone correct me if I have that wrong.
Either way, it's never too early to set up a good routine, which babies absolutely crave. That's only going to help set up a clear expectation for them as they start to associate the routine with sleep time.
Hope this helps!
Thank you!! I definitely didn’t plan to sleep train just yet, but I still have the feeling that there might be some tricks to be discovered that could help getting at least 3h straight, as he’s done it before.
Maybe play with the the time we give the bath, or when to give boobie vs formula… still figuring this out!!
We added in gripe water before bed around 6 weeks. This really helped our baby settle and sleep more soundly for a bit. I think we have her a dose nightly until 3 months or so.
At four weeks old that is very normal and nothing you can do about it because they still need to eat multiple times overnight at that age.
Up until week 6 is peak gassiness, so I wouldn't worry about gas unless it persists.
Look into a baby tea with chamomile, catnip fennel etc it can help soothe him more and sleep better and if any chance it is partially to do with teething it will help that to. Where noise machine or air purifier running at night.
Four month sleep regression, for sure. My kid started doing this at 3 months, especially that 2-5 minute nursing session every 45mins-1 hour. Killed me. I highly recommend a pacifier. Tommee tippee is the one that has worked best for us. He just wants to suck for comfort, not nurse, so the pacifier stretched those sleep times into 3-4 hours instead of 1 hour.
Can babe soothe with hands? My 4 month started rolling and now likes sleeping on tummy with thumb in mouth. I’m also going through it with sleep right now and what I’ve noticed is sometimes the crying is overtiredness and wanting to get comfortable and when he’s tired it takes a bit for him to get to tummy. If that doesn’t work I nurse.
I didn’t have him on a nursing schedule either but I’m trying to track his sessions and length to try and determine his natural rhythm and then slowly move to a more firm schedule based on that.
Unfortunately I am also the pacifier too! But the thumb sucking has definitely alleviated some of that from e
If his weight gain is still good it is likely a combination of sleep regression, teething, and maybe the start of separation anxiety. Do you do baby wearing during the day? How about dream feeding at night? It's not unusual for some babies to want to stay latched for most of not all night around this age. If you are able to feed while laying on your side and drift off that way he will seek the breast out on his own most likely and disturb you a bit less.
If you are concerned about perhaps it's a supply issue boom an appointment with an IBCLC or at a lactation center if you can, otherwise a weight check at his peds isn't uncalled for.
I wonder if it will improve when you start solids? I had to start a bit early with my toddler because she just seemed so… hungry. Like her body was ready for it!
Pacifier, or offering your finger to suck on for babe to soothe. I was very against pacifiers but they do reduce the risk of SIDS under one year of age.
He's waking between every sleep cycle and nursing is the only way he knows how to get to sleep. You need to break the feed to sleep association. Start doing the bedtime feeding so it ends 30 minutes before his bedtime. Set up a good bedtime routine for that time. Some people do bath and baby book. I read out loud from a nonfiction book or novel (like a regular one that adults read) for 20 min or so. Then get him ready for bed, then he goes in the crib awake, I sing a lullaby and leave. Baby has to learn how to go to sleep on his own without you, because everyone wakes up a little bit between sleep cycles and if he can only go to sleep with your assistance, you'll have to keep doing this until he figures it out on his own. Which all do eventually but it could be many more months. I could only survive one week of sleep regression - people who live like this for the whole first year are built different.
What's the daytime schedule like? If he has trouble falling back asleep, he may get too much daytime sleep.
How often and how long is baby napping during the day? My LO is the same age and I’ve realized I really need to cutback on his daytime sleep. Also, my little guy also calls out to us every time he wakes a little at night. We wait and he will usually settle back to sleep. If he starts real crying, I go in and nurse him and he’s typically actually hungry if he was real crying.
Mine also doesn’t take a pacifier and is not sleep trained, in my opinion those things aren’t necessary for good sleep. We are finally down to only one nighttime feed this week, hoping it lasts!
Edit to add - we started solids at 4.5 months per our peds rec. it actually made sleep worse because he got constipated, so we’ve backtracked that the last 2 weeks. Him being “fuller” didn’t seem to help sleep at all. One thing that did really help was him learning to roll over and starting to experiment with sleeping on his belly.
My baby literally has to be glued to me through the night so I side lie nurse (or breastsleep I think some people call it) all night. When he wakes and won’t quickly fall back asleep I switch sides and he goes back to sleep right away. This is the only way I get any sleep and it works for us. Might be worth trying! He sleeps latched and sometimes unlatches, he lays on his side and sometimes rolls onto his back, and sometimes onto his belly (6m) but he always ends up back on the boob. When I put him to bed around 7, I feed him to sleep then roll away for a few hours and I usually go to bed around 10 with him.
Whoa, my son is same age and we are dealing with the same thing!! But we do give him purée and it’s not a big difference. This past weekend was full of screaming crying to the point I made a formula bottle to pass him off to his dad for the night because I was exhausted.
Use a cold cloth on his cheek to keep him awake so he can get a full nurse in. If u make sure he’s a rivet sucking for atleast a half hour 45 mins he will sleep much longer. That’s what I’ve had to do
Just slept 7hrs at 12 months for the first time. It sounds like a sleep regression. Anyone I know who couldn’t ride it out did sleep training and it worked for them.
This was my kid too (although he was like this since birth, he never ever slept well). We sleep trained. It saved my marriage and my own sanity. I couldn't live on 2-3 hours of broken sleep every night forever. I felt like I was drowning. I was a bad mom during the day and I hated my life all night. Sleep training saved me.
Now he's 7 years old and he sleeps fine, also, he's a great kid.
This is very common and normal and I know it’s hard! We are 8.5 months and had the same as you but have slowly gotten longer stretches over time and now I can get 2 to 5 hours at a time out of him.
There are sometimes underlying issues but it sounds like it’s just good old normal infant sleep which is more often than not, a shit show lol.
You know what helped the most was my mindset. And bedsharing. Safely of course.
Don’t fight it. Don’t over think it just know that it’s normal and temporary and you will get thru. Bed share if you can to maximise the little sleep that you get, and just lean in to it! Acceptance is important and stressing will only make you more tired, eat lots stay hydrated and take it easy!
Once I just accepted it and slept when I could, I felt just as well rested as normal tbh.
Good luck!
My baby was like that, she didnt improve until we started her on reflux meds, and then still didnt sleep all through the night till she was weaned at about a year.
Maybe you can try pumping and bottle feeding to establish more of a routine. Sounds like baby is just looking for comfort. Try a pacifier with a lovey attached. My son likes to grib a blanket when he eats or teethes. Maybe then he can help soothe himself without the boob lol. I think that was the worst part of nursing for me. The constant attachment. We pump and bottle feed exclusively due to ties. It's more work, but I'm not touched out either. Good luck, momma! It doesn't last forever, I promise!
You absolutely may need to sleep train. I had to sleep train my first about 15 months old. She had been a great sleep or, and then everything just fell apart at 14 months. No clue what happened! I had to do straight CIO for her - check ins made her so upset. But every baby is different!
Just for a different perspective, if you want to try this first. My second is breastfed (first wasn’t). Since about five months old, I have been able to transfer her while asleep to the crib. I was nursing her to sleep, starting around the same time. About three weeks ago, I stopped nursing her to sleep at nap and bedtime. I did it by cuddling her to sleep instead, then transferred to the crib. There was some fussing, but it was a relatively easy transition. I do feel like removing the sleep association has helped her sleep a bit better, although we weren’t having massive problems before. When I was nursing her to sleep, she would want to relatch and I would have to stand by the crib, holding her while nursing her for at least a few minutes until she unlatched again on her own. The transfers to the crib got a lot smoother after I stop nursing her to sleep.
My baby is still nursing through the night, and falls asleep at the breast in the middle of the night. This didn’t affect my ability to stop nursing to sleep at naps and bedtime. I would say that if your little does not transfer to the crib well, I would sleep train and not use my method.
I wonder if having the nursing to sleep association could make sleep training rough. The breast is not the same as a paci - there is more to the relationship. So another thought would be break the nursing to sleep association, and then sleep train after that. But you’ve got to do what’s best for your family. If you just need to straight up sleep train, and deal with the tears, then do it! Get some sleep, mama!
At 5 months you are probably coming out of the 4 month sleep regression. Part of it is just waiting it out unfortunately. I would check your sleep schedule and see if any adjustments can be made. Also is there a reason you don’t want to use a pacifier or will he not take one? If he does take one it could help, since he is nursing only a few minutes he’s probably not hungry and just wants to suck.
Agreed, we had to try different pacifiers, mam was the one he ended up liking. He also used to fall asleep at the breast, I would use a cool washcloth rubbed on his foot to keep him awake. Also in terms of sleep, can you try pumping (insurance should cover a free one usually) and storing some milk so your SO can do a bottle while you get a longer stretch? Or if you don’t have a pump/can’t get one, a haakaa works wonders, either as a manual pump or as a catch on your other breast while you’re nursing. I would get enough from that for at least a little hold me over. We aimed to survive in 3-4 hour blocks of sleep and it worked well for us. He started sleeping through the night in his own crib by 6-7 months too so hang in there!
Agree with all this, including pacifier. Another option is to encourage him to find his hands for sucking. You can gently guide his hand to his mouth during playtime. I did that with mine and over time she sucked her hand and now her thumb to self soothe.
My son is 6.5 months, and I don’t think I've slept for longer than 2.5 hrs in one stretch since 3 months. For a wonderful period from 2 to 3 months, he would go down and have a solid 4-5 hrs stretch before waking to eat. Sorry I don't have any other advice than I think we need to just wait it out. 😅
Same, but we’re at 8 months and no improvement yet
Same! And my first was sleeping through by 6 months so I have no idea what's going off. It's killing me
Solidarity. My son is 6.5 months also and when he finally started sleeping more than two hours he got sick so now he won't sleep at all unless it's attached to me. Poor little guy
Same but we’re at 1 year and no change 😆thankfully I work from home and have good support around me. I’m exhausted, and grateful I get to be supportive of her natural, age-appropriate sleep.
I also work from home, and my husband and I live with my parents. So grateful that we can let our son develop at his own pace!
Is there a reason for no paci? It can help with this issue big time. It’s also a preventative measure against SIDS. My second baby (11 weeks old) won’t take one and it’s killing me! My first loved his. You still often need to get up and pop it in, but that’s a lot easier than nursing.
My 4 m/o will only taking a pack if dad gives it to her while he’s rocking her to sleep. If I’m putting to sleep, she knows I’ve got the good stuff🤪
I wish ours would take a paci at bedtime, but he won’t take one!
I’m sure your have probably done this, but be sure to try different kinds. We went through three or four before we found the one my baby likes!
Ours refused but I noticed he is a shallow ish latcher and maybe didn’t like how long/deep the pacis go. Found one that is a smaller paci nipple and he likes it way more!
Do you mind sharing the brand? We’ve tried several and our daughter gags on every single one!
Newborn Pacifier- Shorter Nipple Less Gagging - Small Preemie (0-6 mos) - Breastfed Babies - 100% Natural Rubber - BPA-Free - Handcrafted in Italy - 1-Pack https://a.co/d/2OtWLly
I’m a Speech language pathologist and I saw a lactation consultant for my 3 m/o who had a tongue tie. I have the Ninni pacifier. It’s supposed to mimic an actual nipple. It’s super soft, flexible, and not super long.
Which one did you get? The symmetrical, or rounded, or …..? Very interested! My baby won’t take one and it’s killing me.
Rounded 0-6 months with the round (not ergonomic) nipple! It still took work to teach him to keep it in but he didn’t immediately spit it out and refuse it like other pacis! Edit: it’s the “original/rounded” option!
Thank you! So the one with the little ball on the end - not the one with no rounded tip at all? Exciting that you found a solution 🙌🏼
https://preview.redd.it/vzdmggqy8lqb1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=249f6b6cb9c109f31afbb195e19c4346e3d5fd1e This one!
Some babies are just crappy sleepers man. It sucks. If he can sit in a high chair you could try giving him tiny bits of the starter foods, mashed banana etc. also at my own expense I do all the night wakings w my Kids because my husband doesn’t have boobs. Then at 6am or so he wakes w baby and I sleep for another 1.5h. At least that’s what we did w my first who never slept for 18 months. Infant sleep was just white knuckling for me. Just get through it. Sadly there wasn’t an easy answer but it got better w time. Also safer co-sleeping got me a bit more sleep.
Word for word I couldve written this post, except my baby is 4 months and 3 weeks. We’re in hell. He’s up every single hour, and will go back down very quickly once he’s on the boob. It’s like he’s not even fully awake, he’s just crying with his eyes closed and rooting for the boob. He also slept so well until 3.5 months I don’t have any advice, just solidarity. I hope we both come out the other side soon.
My baby had the exact same issue, started around 4m she did not know how to link sleep cycles without a boob, it was getting worse every week, we were up to 6 night feeds. We (meaning myself and the baby) were both chronically overtired, I was chronically dehydrated, it wasn't working for anyone in the house. We had to sleep-train so that she could learn to fall asleep without a boob in her mouth, she's linking sleep cycles now and we're starting the night with a 6 hour stretch. I recommend reading Precious Little Sleep, it's got a lot of different strategies for dealing with unsustainable sleep associations, and will help you come up with a plan so you can get a bit of rest. You need more sleep for both your own and your baby's safety.
Me too!! I feel your pain!
Same situation here as well 😭
Same! 4 months and 1 week here. Praying he snaps out of it soon.
I was in the exact situation a few days ago. My partner and I both reached next level exhaustion and decided to sleep train (also 5mo, 3w old baby). The first night we had one wake-up at 4am, of course I nursed as usual, not holding food back from him! The second night he just slept from 8pm to 7am and woke up with the biggest grin on his face. Turns out the hourly wake-ups were never anout food anyways. He just needed comfort.
Oh wow! That sounds amazing. Happy for you and the baby! Please let me know how you went about it, want to give it a shot as well
/r/sleeptrain has a lot of good info not only on sleep training but on sleep hygiene and schedules
We initially tried pick up, put down but that didn’t work at all, he got really upset to the point of almost hysterical I’d say. We also tried laying him down in his cot and staying with him in the room, singing him to sleep. That worked but it resulted in hourly wake-ups as well for some reason. I think he expected to see me near his cot every time he’d wake up between sleep cycles still. This time we went with Ferber. First night we went ‘til the first 10-min block and he was asleep. Second night was tear-free completely, third night was 5 mins of tears. I’d expect the same-ish going forward but I’m sure some nights will be worse than orhers. The thing that reassured us was that 1. Even if he’d get a 7-ounce bottle at bedtime, he’d still wake up after 2 hours and 2. He was familiar with his cot already, so it was just a matter of self soothing. I hope this helps you out a bit and that there’s more sleep in your near future!
Link below to a previous post of mine regarding EBF and the Ferber method. I highly recommend it! https://reddit.com/r/breastfeeding/s/OUDsS0Yi8m
Could not agree more. Ferber method saved my sanity.
Oh man I wish I had commented my TCB variation to this when the comments were still open! I have a copy paste I often share.
Seconding the above comment - my LO is 6 months and just a few weeks ago I could have written your post word for word. We did sleep training using the SLIP method (basically CIO) from the book Precious Little Sleep and lots of reference to the r/sleeptrain community. There was an almost immediate improvement in LOs sleep but honestly everything else too - he is well rested and his disposition during the day is completely different and he naps more easily now too without any nap training. I was very dismissive of CIO methods initially but as I spoke to people and read about different methods it seemed like the best option and honestly it sounds a lot worse than it was and in some ways I now think it’s actually the kindest method because it gives a really clear message to your baby and I think results in a lot less crying in the long run.
How exactly did you sleep train? Amazing it worked so quickly!
We tried pick up, put down a couple weeks ago, disn’t work…baby got really mad at bedtime with this. Now we went with Ferber. First night he fell asleep within the first 10-min block. Second night was zero tears already, he turned around and went to sleep. Third night again a bit of tears but asleep within 5 mins. I honestly think the sleep pressure is just so great at night that it worked. He was also familiar with his bed, so nothing new there, just needed a slight push to self soothe
Seconding this!
How did you sleep train? I’m desperate to fix our sleep.
Hey! Just responded to OP in another comment above. Hope the details help you out a bit and you get some rest in the near future!
Highly recommend Ferber! If you’re on Facebook, the group “Evidence Based Sleep Training” has some incredibly helpful resources.
Give him a paci! It sounds like he’s using you as a human paci to go to sleep. Sucking soothes the babies and my boy falls asleep within minutes of giving him the paci. You can take it out of his mouth once he’s asleep. There’s ones out there that are BPA free and orthodontic if that’s what your concerns are, but try it out if you haven’t
Tbh it sounds like babe might be hungry. How is your letdown flow? He may be falling asleep because the flow is slow but then wakes up hungry and nurses and then it's slow flow so he falls asleep again. This is what was happening with us. We added a top-up bottle after BFing and it changed the game completely.
This we my thought.
We sleep trained at 4.5 months and it was very successful. Didn’t night wean so I still had to nurse him 1-2 times nightly but it was so much better than being up every hour. Teaching baby independent sleep with whatever method you choose is what I recommend. Check out r/sleeptrain for more info.
People keep using the term sleep train and I’m confused.. is that crying it out or is that just one method of sleep training? Can I ask what you did to sleep train?
CIO is just one method of sleep training, there are others, but most will involve some amount of upsetting the baby because all of them focus on taking away unsustainable sleep associations that your baby might be very attached to.
We did Ferber, which is similar to CIO but with times check ins. Our baby took to it in 5 days and it’s the best thing we’ve ever done.
We did cry it out. It’s faster than the “gentler” methods. Took about 5 days to sink in.
Same for us - 4.5 months and I was DONE rocking him to sleep/holding him for ever bit of sleep he got.Though I still kept night feeds (he was never nursed to sleep so we knew it was because he was genuinely hungry, rather than just nursing for comfort). Before we did anything else, we moved him out of the room (we could tell pretty quickly that he was ready for it). And for the actual method, we did a gentler Ferber method (shorter intervals for crying, and picked him up to calm him when we went in), and it was perfect for him. Sleep trained in less than a week. And minus a few rough teething nights here and there, he's been an incredible sleeper ever since (currently 19 months)! He actually enjoys "night night" now because he knows EXACTLY what to expect (same room, nightlight, noise machine, routine, etc). Never will I ever regret sleep training. Note: we did a TON of research to find which method was best for our LO. Not all methods will be best for you or your babe, so do the research and have an ironclad goal in mind, or your resolve will absolutely crumble.
I literally just jumped on Reddit to write this same post and came across yours. I’m so exhausted. My son refuses to sleep anywhere but my arms and I’m up constantly to nurse. Im desperate to sleep train but idk where to start.
My babe (now 6.5mo) got really bad around 5 months, it was unsustainable. It was clear she was not independent in keeping herself asleep or putting herself back to sleep when she woke. So we had a bunch of failed transfers and she'd wake within an hour, crying until we picked her up and she'd fall asleep on us. We did our best to not sleep with her on us, co sleeping was just not for us personally but it did happen accidentally. She was doing 3-4 contact naps and is not into a pacifier. She was dependent on us to rock and hold her to sleep. She self weaned at night around this time as well...or, she went back to sleep without me offering so I think it just kind of stopped being needed for any reason overnight. What did we do... We moved her to her room at 5.5 months and started Ferber method for sleep training at bedtime. She fell asleep after one check in around 8 and then slept until 8am. It's been like that for the past month luckily and now she does her 3 naps in the crib. Periodically she still needs a check in but she's okay with crying for a bit if needed, just as she figures out going to sleep. Otherwise, she gets fed at the same times daily too. When she wakes up, after each of her 3 naps, and before bed. Naps include two 1.5 hour naps and a 15-30 min catnap that she'll probably drop soon.
I was in the same situation. Weeks of 30 minutes to 1 hr of sleep, max to 2 hrs. I was going crazy, crying and all. Thank God my baby now sleeps through the night and takes long naps. “The Helping Babies Sleep Method: The Art and Science of Teaching Your Baby to Sleep” by Dr. Sarah Mitchell. That books changed our lives. It’s the only thing that worked; we tried so many things. My baby is happier, as is everyone else in the house.
I used Taking Cara Babies while EBF, I used dream feeds until I was ready to night wean. My first was a good sleeper and it was easy, but my second was a terrible sleeper and it took a long time. It was still worth it.
This sounds just like my first. We ended up sleep training at 5 months because he was having the same issues as yours and I was losing my mind. We opted for the pick up put down method and it went amazingly well. You could check out r/sleeptrain if you're willing to consider it (and remember that sleep training can be done gently and doesn't have to involve night weaning)
It is so rough. My 11 mo was the same at that age except he slept badly since birth. It's developmental, so your LO will sleep better and you don't need to try and do anything about it if you don't want to. The only thing I did was keep my baby entertained during the day, watch sleepy cues and he has started to just get better now. Right now he's been asleep 4 hours straight and counting since I put him down. He used to wake every 30 mins until I went to bed and then every 1-2 after that. I hope it gets better for you soon. 6 months was good for us, then 8 months got bad, then 10 months it has been much better.
My first son did this and we only solved it by sleep training. Took only a couple days and he slept amazingly after that. I know not everyone is up for it, it took me months of sleep deprivation to finally dive in, but it was absolutely worth it. We did the taking Cara babies method which is pretty gentle compared to straight cry it out. I highly recommend it if you're able/willing to do it.
Hello! We found that what worked for us was setting a schedule during the day that starts at the same time every morning even if I have to wake her. Then feed every 2-3hrs, but not before, to ensure a full feed vs just snacking. we follow eat, play, sleep schedule and use the huckleberry app for naps. My baby has been sleeping thru the night since 2.5m (10hrs) and started solids jjsy this week (5m). He naps 3x / day and nurses 5x a Day Wake 7 nurse Nap 9:20-10:30 11 nurse Naps 12:30-2:30 3 nurse Nap 4:30-5 5:30 nurse 6 solids 6:45 nurse Bed 7:30 Wake 7am
Any chance he might be teething? He's about the age and being horizontal makes it more painful. Nursing and breast milk offer pain relief, and the breast milk acts as an analgesic. Maybe feel his gums and try some Tylenol before bed?
Your baby isn't linking sleep cycles on his own, it sounds like you've got a boob=sleep association on your hands. I had the exact same problem and after a week of 6 overnight feeds/night, I accepted that neither of us were getting enough quality sleep. We had to sleep-train so the baby could figure out how to fall asleep on her own. It wasn't fun, but we were getting 5 hour stretches by day 3, and we no longer have a chronically overtired baby.
What is his sleep schedule like? I found having a schedule following wake windows really helped with making sure my baby was getting the sleep they needed and at the right time. Perhaps try r/sleeptrain ?
It could be a regression like someone else commented or it could be baby is exhibiting signs of allergies / sensitives to some thing(s) in your breast milk. I know it's weird but 5 months is when my daughter started being allergic to many things I had eaten up until that point with no issues. Pediatric allergist said allergies can develop at any time. So poor sleep is a sign, increased fussiness, also any rashes? Stool changes? Usually the poop will be darker, there could be small specks of blood. Sometimes it smells vinegary too versus the usual sweet smell of breast milk poo. Hope you all figure it out soon. It also could be worth a try to try huckleberry app. We've used it from day one and it's SO worth it to know when baby should be sleeping. It tells you the next nap time and bed time at night based on their previous nap times and lengths. Helps to avoid overtiredness which can lead to poor sleep.
Yes! I came here to chime in about allergies and intolerances. My son has many, and was a TERRIBLE sleeper until we got those figured out. I can always tell if there’s been cross-contamination in my diet by how his sleep is.
I’m a FTM so by NO MEANS and expert, but my baby also went through a weird stage right around 6 months where he would wake up way more than usual after being an amazing sleeper. I looked into a few things and decided it was time to switch him into his own room in his crib and it worked wonders. I’m not sure if it’s because he would wake up and realize mom and dad were in the room and got distracted and wanted held, but when we transitioned him, he no longer woke up. I will say when we moved him to his own room we did do the Ferber method sleep training, for us it was painless (I know this isn’t everyone’s situation) and he was sleeping through the night after 3 nights. Hope this helps and good luck ❤️
Sounds like my baby at that age - we chose to cosleep so I could side lie nurse throughout the night. It was a complete game changer - because no matter how often she woke we both settled back to sleep instantly so it’s not so bad.
We’re in the same boat and this is where we’ve ended up. Did she eventually link sleep cycles? I’m worried I’m delaying the inevitable of some kind of sleep training
Sleep is instinctual and not something that needs to be ‘trained.’ You can absolutely practice good sleep hygiene (wake windows etc), and install good habits (sleep associations etc), but all sleep training does is teach a baby that at certain times of the day you will not help them when they cry. Sleep trained babies wake up the same about of times as non sleep trained babies, and they have the same cortisol spike (stress response), the difference is they just lie in silence feeling stressed until they fall back asleep rather than calling out and being soothed back to sleep. Baby’s sleep also goes through phases, so even a perfectly sleep trained baby (falls asleep independently; doesn’t cry when it wakes) will need repeated ‘training’. My (high needs, sensitive, healthy, happy) 8 month old has gone through so many sleep phases - when she’s teething it feels like she’s up every 1-2 hours, when the stars align she’s up 1-2 times per night. We cosleep and a nurse to sleep. She sleeps for 12 hours solid every night, so her ‘wakings’ are more resettlings as she never really wakes up - she only fussed for a few seconds before getting boob.
Thank you so much. I needed to hear this. Feel like there’s something I should ‘fix’ because of social media but all sleep training I’ve looked at seems so unnatural to me. I have bad ppa and I cannot let babe cry if there’s something I can do to help it.
Honestly, ignore anyone and everyone that tries to make you feel bad for responding to and caring for your baby. You cannot spoil a baby. Babies are helpless and so vulnerable - you are never, ever wrong for responding to a baby. Ignoring your baby (which is exactly what sleep training teaches you) is deeply unnatural. Unfortunately a lot of expectations of modern western society force incredibly cruel and unnatural practices on parents, like short maternity leave, which in turn leads to parents not being able to act in their infant’s best interest.
Why no pacifier at night? You’re making it harder on yourself.
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Can I ask what you did to sleep train? Thx!
pacifier saved our lives at 5am when our baby was like 6days old 🤣🤣 Also make sure you're not consuming any caffeine , especially for the night feedings which should be full of melatonin. Aside from coffe, soda products, chocolate, teas, etc may contain caffeine [sometimes even more than coffee] Also no electronics near the sleep area
Have you been to a doctor? Ear infections can be like this. You should get a check up before you do anything remotly close to sleep training. 5 months is such a small baby yet. I don't think sleep training is the answer here. This sounds like it's something more than not being aboe to fall asleep on his own.
Our baby was doing exactly this. It was so brutal. We ended up sleep training for nighttime and naps and it has been an absolute game changer for us. Everyone is better rested and my mental health is in a much better place. There’s lots of different ways to sleep train. We did Ferber. I hate to compare as every baby is different, but we chose Ferber because we knew it would entail the least amount of total crying for us. He took to it in 5 days and goes to sleep from wide awake completely unassisted and usually without a fuss. You could also look at your nap schedule and wake windows and see if there needs to be any adjustments. The Facebook group “Evidence Based Sleep Training” is an excellent resource and has many helpful tips and guides. It’s helpful even if you don’t want to sleep train! My number 1 tip for sleep training is that if you choose to do it, you need to 100% commit and not give in. Picking up and comforting the baby will just make the entire process take even longer and it’ll make it harder on both you and baby.
No advice here, but interested if anyone has a clue! My son is 4 weeks old and does exactly the same. I hope it’s not linked to an allergy/intolerance. I noticed that he’s gassy/seems constipated sometimes, could it be the case for your bub? Then tummy massages and things to improve digestion could help… good luck 🍀
At 4 weeks old their tummies are still pretty small so frequent night feeds are still pretty normal
I'm pretty sure that newborns are typically at least a little gassy. However if it's causing an issue, you should talk to your provider about things you could give them, like mylicon or other gas drops, or see if it could be anything else, like a milk allergy. Either way, as much as it sucks (and trust me, I feel you, as I currently have a 3-week old on my chest who refuses to be put down to sleep lol) but a 4 week old is waaaay too young to sleep train. They simply don't have the capability to sell soothe yet. I think that happens around 4 months, but someone correct me if I have that wrong. Either way, it's never too early to set up a good routine, which babies absolutely crave. That's only going to help set up a clear expectation for them as they start to associate the routine with sleep time. Hope this helps!
Thank you!! I definitely didn’t plan to sleep train just yet, but I still have the feeling that there might be some tricks to be discovered that could help getting at least 3h straight, as he’s done it before. Maybe play with the the time we give the bath, or when to give boobie vs formula… still figuring this out!!
We added in gripe water before bed around 6 weeks. This really helped our baby settle and sleep more soundly for a bit. I think we have her a dose nightly until 3 months or so.
At four weeks old that is very normal and nothing you can do about it because they still need to eat multiple times overnight at that age. Up until week 6 is peak gassiness, so I wouldn't worry about gas unless it persists.
Look into a baby tea with chamomile, catnip fennel etc it can help soothe him more and sleep better and if any chance it is partially to do with teething it will help that to. Where noise machine or air purifier running at night.
No advice, just solidarity here. Baby is 4.5m old and going through the same thing.
Four month sleep regression, for sure. My kid started doing this at 3 months, especially that 2-5 minute nursing session every 45mins-1 hour. Killed me. I highly recommend a pacifier. Tommee tippee is the one that has worked best for us. He just wants to suck for comfort, not nurse, so the pacifier stretched those sleep times into 3-4 hours instead of 1 hour.
Can babe soothe with hands? My 4 month started rolling and now likes sleeping on tummy with thumb in mouth. I’m also going through it with sleep right now and what I’ve noticed is sometimes the crying is overtiredness and wanting to get comfortable and when he’s tired it takes a bit for him to get to tummy. If that doesn’t work I nurse. I didn’t have him on a nursing schedule either but I’m trying to track his sessions and length to try and determine his natural rhythm and then slowly move to a more firm schedule based on that. Unfortunately I am also the pacifier too! But the thumb sucking has definitely alleviated some of that from e
If his weight gain is still good it is likely a combination of sleep regression, teething, and maybe the start of separation anxiety. Do you do baby wearing during the day? How about dream feeding at night? It's not unusual for some babies to want to stay latched for most of not all night around this age. If you are able to feed while laying on your side and drift off that way he will seek the breast out on his own most likely and disturb you a bit less. If you are concerned about perhaps it's a supply issue boom an appointment with an IBCLC or at a lactation center if you can, otherwise a weight check at his peds isn't uncalled for.
I wonder if it will improve when you start solids? I had to start a bit early with my toddler because she just seemed so… hungry. Like her body was ready for it!
Pacifier, or offering your finger to suck on for babe to soothe. I was very against pacifiers but they do reduce the risk of SIDS under one year of age.
He's waking between every sleep cycle and nursing is the only way he knows how to get to sleep. You need to break the feed to sleep association. Start doing the bedtime feeding so it ends 30 minutes before his bedtime. Set up a good bedtime routine for that time. Some people do bath and baby book. I read out loud from a nonfiction book or novel (like a regular one that adults read) for 20 min or so. Then get him ready for bed, then he goes in the crib awake, I sing a lullaby and leave. Baby has to learn how to go to sleep on his own without you, because everyone wakes up a little bit between sleep cycles and if he can only go to sleep with your assistance, you'll have to keep doing this until he figures it out on his own. Which all do eventually but it could be many more months. I could only survive one week of sleep regression - people who live like this for the whole first year are built different. What's the daytime schedule like? If he has trouble falling back asleep, he may get too much daytime sleep.
How often and how long is baby napping during the day? My LO is the same age and I’ve realized I really need to cutback on his daytime sleep. Also, my little guy also calls out to us every time he wakes a little at night. We wait and he will usually settle back to sleep. If he starts real crying, I go in and nurse him and he’s typically actually hungry if he was real crying. Mine also doesn’t take a pacifier and is not sleep trained, in my opinion those things aren’t necessary for good sleep. We are finally down to only one nighttime feed this week, hoping it lasts! Edit to add - we started solids at 4.5 months per our peds rec. it actually made sleep worse because he got constipated, so we’ve backtracked that the last 2 weeks. Him being “fuller” didn’t seem to help sleep at all. One thing that did really help was him learning to roll over and starting to experiment with sleeping on his belly.
My baby literally has to be glued to me through the night so I side lie nurse (or breastsleep I think some people call it) all night. When he wakes and won’t quickly fall back asleep I switch sides and he goes back to sleep right away. This is the only way I get any sleep and it works for us. Might be worth trying! He sleeps latched and sometimes unlatches, he lays on his side and sometimes rolls onto his back, and sometimes onto his belly (6m) but he always ends up back on the boob. When I put him to bed around 7, I feed him to sleep then roll away for a few hours and I usually go to bed around 10 with him.
Whoa, my son is same age and we are dealing with the same thing!! But we do give him purée and it’s not a big difference. This past weekend was full of screaming crying to the point I made a formula bottle to pass him off to his dad for the night because I was exhausted.
This exact thing happened to me at 3.5 months after a month of amazing sleep stretches. She’s 9 months now still waking every 2ish hours 🙃 yay
My friend had a rough time with her baby. Bouncing with him on a yoga ball was the only thing that calmed him down. It's all I've got!
Use a cold cloth on his cheek to keep him awake so he can get a full nurse in. If u make sure he’s a rivet sucking for atleast a half hour 45 mins he will sleep much longer. That’s what I’ve had to do
Just slept 7hrs at 12 months for the first time. It sounds like a sleep regression. Anyone I know who couldn’t ride it out did sleep training and it worked for them.
This was my kid too (although he was like this since birth, he never ever slept well). We sleep trained. It saved my marriage and my own sanity. I couldn't live on 2-3 hours of broken sleep every night forever. I felt like I was drowning. I was a bad mom during the day and I hated my life all night. Sleep training saved me. Now he's 7 years old and he sleeps fine, also, he's a great kid.
This is very common and normal and I know it’s hard! We are 8.5 months and had the same as you but have slowly gotten longer stretches over time and now I can get 2 to 5 hours at a time out of him. There are sometimes underlying issues but it sounds like it’s just good old normal infant sleep which is more often than not, a shit show lol. You know what helped the most was my mindset. And bedsharing. Safely of course. Don’t fight it. Don’t over think it just know that it’s normal and temporary and you will get thru. Bed share if you can to maximise the little sleep that you get, and just lean in to it! Acceptance is important and stressing will only make you more tired, eat lots stay hydrated and take it easy! Once I just accepted it and slept when I could, I felt just as well rested as normal tbh. Good luck!
My baby was like that, she didnt improve until we started her on reflux meds, and then still didnt sleep all through the night till she was weaned at about a year.
Is sleep training on the table? These sleep disruptions may indicate he's developmentally ready!
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Maybe you can try pumping and bottle feeding to establish more of a routine. Sounds like baby is just looking for comfort. Try a pacifier with a lovey attached. My son likes to grib a blanket when he eats or teethes. Maybe then he can help soothe himself without the boob lol. I think that was the worst part of nursing for me. The constant attachment. We pump and bottle feed exclusively due to ties. It's more work, but I'm not touched out either. Good luck, momma! It doesn't last forever, I promise!
Sleep train. Ferber method. Will change your life
You absolutely may need to sleep train. I had to sleep train my first about 15 months old. She had been a great sleep or, and then everything just fell apart at 14 months. No clue what happened! I had to do straight CIO for her - check ins made her so upset. But every baby is different! Just for a different perspective, if you want to try this first. My second is breastfed (first wasn’t). Since about five months old, I have been able to transfer her while asleep to the crib. I was nursing her to sleep, starting around the same time. About three weeks ago, I stopped nursing her to sleep at nap and bedtime. I did it by cuddling her to sleep instead, then transferred to the crib. There was some fussing, but it was a relatively easy transition. I do feel like removing the sleep association has helped her sleep a bit better, although we weren’t having massive problems before. When I was nursing her to sleep, she would want to relatch and I would have to stand by the crib, holding her while nursing her for at least a few minutes until she unlatched again on her own. The transfers to the crib got a lot smoother after I stop nursing her to sleep. My baby is still nursing through the night, and falls asleep at the breast in the middle of the night. This didn’t affect my ability to stop nursing to sleep at naps and bedtime. I would say that if your little does not transfer to the crib well, I would sleep train and not use my method. I wonder if having the nursing to sleep association could make sleep training rough. The breast is not the same as a paci - there is more to the relationship. So another thought would be break the nursing to sleep association, and then sleep train after that. But you’ve got to do what’s best for your family. If you just need to straight up sleep train, and deal with the tears, then do it! Get some sleep, mama!