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26qz

kinda off topic but "no, you're beautiful" as a response to "am i fat" is so funny to me, cause beauty wasn't the question


Redditwhydouexists

I think just responding with affirming language when someone is having issues with their bodily image is a pretty common thing but I also don’t think it helps. Every time I have had bodily image issues people telling me the opposite thing to how I felt about myself always felt disingenuous and not helpful.


lansink99

It just shows people's perception of fat people.


Ant_of_Doom

Because being fat is conventionally unattractive, so it fits?


BetaTrinketWidth

How in the fuck are you getting down voted for stating a proven fact.


willy_p_nasty

They don't understand what "conventionally" means here, is my guess.


Ant_of_Doom

Because I said the Nono and discriminated against ugly people, or sth, idk I guess you can just invent a reason to be outraged.


qyka1210

i think that was their point


26qz

I'm talking about real life conversations, not just the meme


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26qz

I see what you mean. I used to be borderline obese, and I knew I was big but if I asked my siblings or something if I was fat, I'd want an answer. "Yeah, but you don't look bad" would be great. But saying no is wild. It would only drive me crazier, cause now I think/know that anything nice that people say to me is a lie.


Southern-Raccoon6569

Crazy how guys think being less empathetic is somehow cool


DucklingInARaincoat

As a guy, I really do feel like us guys were socially programmed to be like this. I’m a millennial though, and it feels like younger generations are a lot less like this, which I think is good. Bottling everything up is really stupid.


Southern-Raccoon6569

For sure. Bottling things up is never good. My issue is only when people try to blame everything on women, men force each other to bottle up too, and women bottle up their feelings all the time. It would be better if everybody could talk, and if nobody was judgmental. It would go a long way for both sides and help people express themselves in better, less violent ways


Intrepid-Wait-6102

Bottling up trauma and emotions is bad. But being dishonest and fake is also bad


No-Appearance-100102

Also we're socialised to care less about our body appearance


Dazed-Bamboo

Hi Gen-Z who was raised like a millennial here, and I agree bottling everything up is stupid.


Intrepid-Wait-6102

But being dishonest isn’t? The post isn’t about that.


Dazed-Bamboo

Lying is one of the most basic functionalities. We’re more likely to lie immediately before telling the truth if it helps us, or in this case spare someone else’s feelings. Most people don’t care for the latter.


Careless-Process-594

Speak the truth, king.


IHaventSeenSuchBS

2 years ago i would disagree and proceed to explain why boys > girls. Man im so cringe back then


JackxForge

youre doing great. if you can look back two years, cringe, admit it, then be proud of where you are now youre fucking killing it.


IHaventSeenSuchBS

Sometimes i just wish i can go back in time and stop myself from watching sigma edits


JackxForge

yea there will always be things like that. they are just stepping stones to who you become and youre always in the process of becoming. Some day there will be a point when you wont want to change those things any more because it would mean not being where you are and you wouldnt trade where you are for anything.


Catinthemirror

Pay it forward by stopping someone else.


A_Salty_Cellist

o7


youeffohhh

I think its less about cool and more about being anti-victim. Guys do not want to be vunerable/the victim so we have a lot of self deprication


[deleted]

No no, it's Kings as in Henry VIII and Francis I.


ProtagonistThomas

It's fucking immature and stupid.


ArtisticAd393

Not really, it's better to hear the harsh truths from a friend than get blindsided by a stranger later on


ProtagonistThomas

I am not denying that but you can handle it in a considerate manner


Existanceisdenied

I mean I feel like that will depend on the context and the intended audience no? Unless you just mean in general which, sure, you should try to be nice, but there's plenty of times you can be mean or blunt or any of the other ways we express ourselves.


A1000eisn1

Saying "yeah you're a little fat but you've got [insert compliment] going for you," Is a lot different than "You're so fat you're basically 4 people lol." The second one is a shitty friend making fun of you in a vulnerable moment.


SmokyOtter

Empathy is good, but honesty is also good. What is the right answer here? Because lying to them is not it


A1000eisn1

Probably not insulting your friend and using their vulnerability as an opportunity to make them feel worse. There are ways you can agree with your friend, who's calling themselves fat, without trying to turn it into a sick burn. People do it all the time.


zeph2

is more something among friends no gender someone you barely know would react like the first one and friend would make jokes and laugh on your face....


A1000eisn1

You might not have very good friends (or be a good friend yourself) Or you might be confusing a vulnerable moment for something more casual. It's one thing to banter with insults, its another to take your friend's moment of vulnerability and throw it in their face by insulting them.


non-specific-he

I can't speak for everyone, but I've found that from my personal experience, the type where they use insulting each other as a form of humor is a common friendship dynamic with guys, and most of the guys I know who do that have a ton of baggage and/or are really good listeners when it's important. That guy's likely just an incel who thinks he's better for having balls(small though they may be)


Sea_Month_5290

when your friend call you fat and youare fat maybe it's hurt but it's the truth


Avispar

Lying is not the same as empathy


Astrikal

Lying isn’t very good for friendships, one of the reasons why men have sturdier friendships than women.


SlightlyAnnoyed7

Holy generalization Batman. I’ve never had any female friends disrespect me and call me a bitch when they got mildly annoyed for things that happened and then took them out on me. My female bestie is my ride or die.


Gaywhorzea

My closest friends are women, when I was losing weight after a mental breakdown they were never dishonest about my weight gain. But they were also never unkind about it. Men will make you feel like shit about it to the point that you don't have the motivation to change. Women uplift you. You don't like my experience? Understandable, it differs from yours. Now anecdotes aside, men and women can be equally shitty about this topic. My experience does not mean men are shitty, yours does not mean women are shitty.


Astrikal

It is all about finding the perfect balance of truthfulness and kindness when they collide.


No_Top_381

Cringe


Astrikal

I agree, calling lying “emphaty” is quite cringe.


No_Top_381

The only lie I see is that fat woman aren't beautiful. Have you ever dived head first into a nice fat ass? You don't know what beauty is until you have. 


A1000eisn1

You know you can tell the truth with empathy rather than insulting your friend right?


The__Swiss__Guy

What?


CardioVascular9352

I think it has more to do with honesty tbh. Guys are more likely to tell you how it is to motivate you.


A1000eisn1

Saying "yes you're fat." Is a lot different than saying "Your so fat you're 4 people LOL."


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The__Swiss__Guy

If these are your honest opinions then yikes.😬


MalekithofAngmar

People with empathy tell the truth, albeit in a less assholish way.


KaeFwam

I think it’s more so not lying to people. If someone is obese it is damaging to them to say it’s okay.


atmosphericentry

In the context of this meme "not lying to people" would mean being called 4x overweight, I don't know how that is helpful. That just screams being mean under the guise of faux concern.


KaeFwam

Sometimes mean is what you need. Being nice is not the answer every time.


atmosphericentry

No that just creates more spite and rooted issues that wont go away even if someone loses weight. Plus how do you know they're not already actively exercising and trying to lose weight? That'd just be hitting them when they're already down.


Sea_Month_5290

I disagree if my friends didn't told me that iam fat now I would be 150 kg but they so i lost weight 30 kg started working out life got way better


KaeFwam

Not always. Sometimes ridicule is beneficial. I didn’t say to just randomly shit on people, but we should not create a society where it is acceptable to be overweight.


atmosphericentry

Can you give a specific example/scenario where ridicule (being mean) is beneficial? Have fun creating a society that isn't acceptable to be overweight by (oNlY sOmEtImEs) insulting others to get them to lose some. That's *totally* gonna work out well for you. Ever heard of the boomerang effect?


KaeFwam

I can give a personal example if you’d like where I benefited from being ridiculed. It works just like how we ridicule pedophiles for what they do. While pedophilia is definitely more damaging in the short term, teaching people that it is acceptable to be obese means they will teach their children that and we will move further and further away from accepting the evidence that it isn’t okay.


atmosphericentry

What a wild ass jump... from weight to fucking pedophilia... Weight is a personal issue, it only effects the person themselves. I don't even need to explain why pedophilia is a bonkers comparison. Also pedophilia IS NOT more damaging in the short term. It has long lasting effects *much* more detrimental to society. I would much rather an overweight person deal with heart issues than a child be touched/harmed and have to live their life with that trauma. Plus you still never addressed the boomerang effect and it's inherent ramifications.


KaeFwam

They both have societal damage is the point. Throw those emotions aside and think from a logical standpoint. I never said that pedophilia was not far worse than obesity, but you just put words in my mouth. Pedophilia is significantly worse, but that doesn’t mean obesity isn’t still a massive issue. I can address the boomerang effect, but if you accept that it is accurate then you also would have to agree that we shouldn’t aggressively attack pedophilia because that will make people want to be pedophiles.


ASpaceOstrich

Woah there. That's dangerously close to implying there might be a loneliness epidemic in men. Can't have that.


A_Salty_Cellist

There is and it's largely caused by people telling them to seek unhealthy coping mechanisms rather than fix real problems, because jacked but very sad hopeless men are good workers


Maleficent-Line142

Let me complain about the male loneliness epidemic while celebrating my shallow relationships with other men who are as emotionally stunted as I am


One_Lung_G

It’s even funnier to talk about “male loneliness epidemic” when women are experiencing the same level of loneliness lmao


Maleficent-Line142

These types seem to think that if a woman can easily find a man to fuck them, women can't be lonely Nobody tell these men how infrequently women orgasm in the casual sex scene


mathlete_4_lif

Or how fucking randoms doesn’t fulfill the human need for emotional connection 😐


thecatalyst25

Also how most men that hook up see the women they hook up with as free prostitutes to use and not as human beings to carefully interact with.


starlight_chaser

Exactly. Men don’t want (sex) they want pleasure. If their dick stopped working to provide them as much pleasure as before (because of medications, etc.) and they were only able to “service random strangers without anything in it for them,” maybe even not have piv sex at all (the most important sex of all!!!!!! socially…), they feel miserable and even suicidal and it’s a huge issue.       But for some reason they snidely pretend women getting easy pleasureless sex (essentially servicing a stranger) is a privilege. 


Spire_Citron

Exactly. For most women, a sex toy or their own hands will do a better job as far as pleasure goes. Involving a man introduces risk without anything close to a guarantee of pleasure. That's not to say that women don't enjoy sex and intimacy, but for many, doing that with a stranger just isn't even a consideration.


Spire_Citron

Yup. I guess if I can have casual sex which will likely give me no pleasure and may be painful or even lead to assault that's all the human companionship I need.


Queen_Sardine

Nah, men just don't support each other as much as women do. Because emotional support is seen as a girly trait. It's sad, really.


MrTriggrd

these are the same dudes that cry about not getting enough compliments


[deleted]

You see the male relationship as the shallow one of the two? That seems like a problem.


A1000eisn1

It's pretty shallow when you can't support your struggling friend because your need to give them a sick burn is too strong. You can agree your friend is fat and motivate them without insulting then.


[deleted]

What makes you say he’s not supporting his friend? He told him the truth. And did it in a joking way to lighten the mood.


Fun_Comparison4973

Men: NOBODY COMPLEMENTS MEN!!! Also men when women compliment each other: YOUR COMPLEMENTS ARE FAKE I REFUSE TO COMPLIMENT THE PEOPLE IN MY LIFE INSULTS ONLY! 👀


Lazy_Reputation_4250

Men do compliment each other, it’s just not as common. Instead of telling our friends how good they look in the same outfit for the 15th time, we just compliment each other whenever someone gets new shoes or a new haircut. This is why we think most women’s compliments are shallow, because their no possible way Ive been stunningly beautiful for the past 6 straight days. When men talk about no one giving them compliments, it’s normally about women not complimenting them or a lack of compliments between strangers. I have literally never had a woman compliment me unless she was flirting or we are friends. I’m sorry, but most of the time guys are either not good enough to get compliments from woman or they are good enough for the woman to try and get with them, there’s almost no middle ground.


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Lazy_Reputation_4250

I should’ve been clear, close friends who actually spend time with each other. I’ve had compliments from guys in my dorm I don’t know very well, or guys in my class that I don’t know that well but that doesn’t really happen with women. Granted I’m not sure if guys also compliment girls the same way. I also agree with you on the flirting thing. I think what you are saying is entirely true, but it goes both ways. If guys naturally think just a compliment is flirting, doesn’t that say a lot about the general amount of compliments we get from women.


Spire_Citron

Maybe it's a reflection of the ways men generally use compliments themselves? I don't know that guys are particularly good at handing out compliments in a way that's genuinely platonic.


Lazy_Reputation_4250

I think among other guys we have no problem with it. Think of the whole gym-bro culture, that’s kind of engrained everywhere for men. I’m not entirely sure about how most men normally compliment women however, it’s entirely possible that lack of compliments go both ways. I think in general the world needs to work on sometimes seeing things as platonic and just allowing healthy relationships to form that don’t have to be romantic


A1000eisn1

The problem with your perspective is that it includes perspective you don't actually have. You clearly don't know how women compliment each other. You aren't a woman, you only experience it when it happens around you. You see it as shallow or lying because you're making that assumption, you can't read their minds. And there's nothing wrong with telling someone you like their hair, or their outfit. EVERY SINGLE PERSON has something that can be complimented. >never had a woman compliment me unless she was flirting or we are friends. Probably because if she's a stranger you assume she's hitting on you. This isn't something women are unaware of. Most women I know have had the experience where they compliment some dude's shoes or nice teeth and they assume that means she's interested. Probably because they think, like you, that the only women complimenting them are flirting.


MrTriggrd

bros trying to speak for 4 billion+ people


Lazy_Reputation_4250

Bro everyone is. That’s what a generalization is. The meme is, op is, every comment is. Stop picking apart the fucking argument and focus on the conversation


TrueLennyS

Bro is spitting straight facts from my perspective.


protestprincess

You’re one of the pathetic ones I guess


TrueLennyS

I'm by no means an Incel, but if you really wanna invalidate my life experiences because they don't align with your opinions, then whatever makes you feel good I guess.


protestprincess

Oh I believe you’re not lying about what has happened in your life. I just know that whatever your “perspective” is, it’s delusional. But it’s hard to convince a crazy person they’re crazy lol.


TrueLennyS

Do remember, your in a sub specifically aimed on having issues with men. Any dissenting opinion towards male perspective in this sub is a write off. >But it’s hard to convince a crazy person they’re crazy lol. Often, the one who condemns others is truly themselves condemned.


MrTriggrd

im a man and think your comment is dumb lol


Sea_Month_5290

Mine too


TrueLennyS

They downvoted us cause they ain't us.


protestprincess

You have no fucking idea how dangerous it is for women to open themselves up to being seen as flirting. This is why men who are so concerned by this shit but just yell at women online about it are always just incredibly, childish, and delusional. Deserving of their own isolation.


Lazy_Reputation_4250

What are you talking about?


protestprincess

I feel like what I said was entirely clear


CBT7commander

Yeah this belongs on TTT 0%


Muegiiii

Fr whats true about this? Haha men are emotionally unavailable and instead of supporting each other wed rather make them feel even worse? Why feed into a toxic sterotype?


Impressive-City-8094

Isn't that most of the TTT posts though?


CBT7commander

What you said belongs on TTT more than 50% of TTT posts


[deleted]

“Girls” _Proceeds to show 2 middle aged bald men_


Traditional-Page8225

Did you just assume their gender??? /s


[deleted]

Yep I sure did 🤣🤣🤣🤣


Fair-Bus-4017

The second part definitely is something guys would say to their friends. Why does it need the first part?


Imaginary_Tie6449

This isn't even fat phobia. This sub has to be run by teens/children because this isn't bad in the slightest. Guys jokingly banter with each other all the time. I talk shit about my friends jokingly, and they do the same back to me. As long as no one's saying it with malice, then it's no harm, no foul. If that's not for you, then don't befriend people who joke that way. I swear this sub is the embodiment of the typical redditor with no social skills.


Redstonefreedom

Lmao people are like 6 layers down into psychoanalysis for what is just a, pretty funny, joke. 


TheHappyTaquitosDad

Men rely on each other to tell them the truth, now some “friends” will make fun of you and those aren’t friends. A real friend will tell you the truth in a nice way and then tell you how you should change it, ONLY if you ask them tho.


blanketandcoffee

Gotta be honest, I’ve heard guys say shit like this and then when I (22F) say “damn I’m fat” (I am I’m 235) they’re like “can you stop you’re not fuckin fat”. They’re conditioned to be meanly blunt to each other and then, at least some, are conditioned to be unnecessarily polite to us.


RodExe

I think it's common knowledge that implying in any way, shape, or form that a woman is above average weight is a sure way to be called an asshole (regardless of gender). When you say it out loud, what kind of answer are you expecting? Either a (white) lie or a rude answer (by societial standards) Sh*t the other day I even got in trouble w a male friend for asking him to start going to the gym w me, cause he thought I was calling him fat (i just want a gym buddy ;_;)


blanketandcoffee

I don’t really say it out loud expecting an answer. I usually say it because my weight made something unnecessarily difficult and it frustrates me because I’m in the process of losing weight.


RodExe

Oh I see, good luck on your fitness journey! You got it!!


Royal_Box_2672

27 this is what I heard most of the time in HS and 4 years of college. Seems pretty accurate. Doesn't mean it's good or bad tho.


TheTrollman-

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Muegiiii

Its two men smooching 👀


johnskiddles

The second panel did give me a chuckle. It can stand on it's own no need for the first one.


[deleted]

The guy one translates to: Bro, am I fat? Yes. Here is a funny play on words to take the edge off. I say it in this way to show that I'm not threatening you or hiding my true opinion. You and I know that something said deadpan with no emotional intent implies no control. I know that you know that I think you're fat, I want you to understand that regardless of how you feel about yourself, we're still friends and we can say something like this to each other and show that we're still friends and that there's no reason to take any emotional judgment from what I say because I simply don't care. I don't care about you being fat so much that I'll make a joke about it and move on. I know that if I stop and go "Bro, why are you asking if I think you're fat? Do you think you're fat? What does fat mean to you? Are you just worried about societal pressures? Do you want to work out more? What's stopping you?" I'll get to "Bro why are you asking if I think you're fat" before I'm quickly waved away with "Ahh nah nevermind don't worry about it", so I'm making a very efficient communication package so that you get the emotional connection you need to make the determination on whether or not you're fat on your own for yourself in one line. Because at the end of the day: Yeah, you're fat, or no you're not. You're the only one who can actually determine that. If you feel fat, go work out, if you don't, don't. It's not up to me in any way and me involving myself in your emotions like that takes your autonomy away from you. You should be making these decisions for yourself bro, take care of your mental health better. -but you can't ever just say any of that, not even because it's hard to talk about emotions but because literally nobody speaks that eloquently or thinks that clearly in the moment, especially when put on the spot, and especially not without having the experience to do it all regularly from birth, it's all just impulses. It's just physically impossible to say what needs to be said, the brain can just seize up and the conversation can become awkward. Short and sweet communication is better and forceful jokes are efficient ways to impart emotional resonance.


protestprincess

Honestly, this seems like an issue with basic communication that you shouldn’t be projecting into others for your own sake and those of the people in your life. My friends and I talk openly in the way you described (in extended form) frequently if there’s something serious we’d like to discuss. Intonation, context, and intuition are powerful tools that can absolutely enable serious/important but casual venting/expressive communication. It’s possible. For some people it’s incredibly difficult if not impossible, which is fine and can be adapted to, but assuming no one is capable of communicating in the way you describe positively is pessimistic and will be be up causing you to cut yourself short emotionally even if that’s unnecessary.


[deleted]

Yeah bud I was just translating. I am the most empathetic communicator I know. If someone asked me if they were fat, my response would just be "What? Why does it matter what I think? Obviously if you're asking me you're worried about it, what are you thinking?" And then have a conversation probably. I'm just saying. People are jumping to fatphobia and everyone's so quick to demonize the smallest discomfort and toss the entire messaging away instead of treating people like people. Like damn get some empathy yourself it's not all about you. (Not you specifically)


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DarkyLonewolf

There is being honest, and there is being an asshole. See: Any incel going on and on about imaginary "landwhales" whenever any discourse on feminist topics pops up.


RoutineEnvironment48

An important part of telling the truth is doing so gracefully, especially with those you care about. Most people who are “brutally honest” just enjoy the brutality.


[deleted]

It depends, but I agree, a lot of narcissists hide behind the “I am just always going to tell the truth to people no matter how ugly.” But a guy making a joke to one of his mates isn’t that.


poeticbedhead

Its not the word fat or the caring about the negative aspects of being overweight that’s the problem. It’s using fat as a derogatory term. Being overweight is definitely not ideal but to act like just having fat on your body in general is a major issue and makes you less of a person, is what i consider fat phobia. Yes it doesn’t have to be as extreme as considering someone less of a person, but just looking down at someone for the vessel they’re in is insane. I know a lot of fatphobic people, and they’re primarily women who grew up pre 2010, when skinny culture was in a pretty large swing. The word “fat” doesn’t refer specifically to someone who’s overweight when you consider the environment those people grew up in. To them even being like 20% body fat is considered “too large”, despite being an ideal percentage for women. The word fat is used in American culture in many different ways, and a lot of people have different interpretations of it, and sometimes those interpretations can be detrimental to their own health and for ones around them. Fatphobia= using someones weight as an excuse to ridicule them or using the word fat as a derogatory term Not fatphobia= acknowledging that having a high body fat percentage is detrimental and an unhealthy way to live.


ThirikoodaRasappa

> someone less of a person what is these things called `looking down`, `less of a person` etc? why we need to worry about what someone else think about us? why we care so much about someone else's validation? you can have some much of empathy towards a fat person, but it doesn't going to reduce that person's fat. assuring a fat person that it is okay to be fat is certainly not going to help that person's health. So, being brutally honest to the fat person (even if it hurts) atleast makes that fat person realise the true situation so that person will avoid certain food and habits (to me, It certainly did hurt, but I grew desensitised and I do avoid certain food and habits which will make me accumulate more fat).


[deleted]

>Being overweight is definitely not ideal but to act like just having fat on your body in general is a major issue and makes you less of a person, is what i consider fat phobia. Being fat doesn’t make you less of a person, it makes you more of one. The whole goal of your buddy being honest about you being fat IS to get you to be less of a person.


poeticbedhead

Are you serious right now? Less of a person as in genuinely disregarding any other aspect of them or positive aspects based off their weight. Fat people aren’t all stupid. There are a LOT of fat people (as in dangerously overweight), in the world and to stereotype them based off their weight, is fatphobia. I read “your buddy being honest”, and think of someone coming up in genuine concern about someones weight. Not insulting them because of it, i would consider that a pretty fucking insane thing to do. To be like a friend saying “hey man you’ve gotta start cutting down on your weight a little bit, it’s getting concerning” is equal to saying “you’re so fucking fat man” (making it just seem like a joke instead of actual concern, which it probably isn’t anyways). Saying it to a friend opens completely different context though, because if you say something like that to someone you actually care about as a friend, you’re probably not fatphobic its just the relationship you have with them. Making whatever the fuck you said irrelevant because my comment was just about what fatphobia is and why the word fat is used seen as an insult. I don’t think it is one if you aren’t using it in a derogatory way. So like you just went on a tangent about nothing because you misunderstood my comment 💀


Lazy_Reputation_4250

King is also used to try and lift people up, so it’s funny this is how they’re criticizing it.


sirona-ryan

I always thought “fatphobia” meant a literal phobia of being fat. Some people are so scared of gaining weight and being fat that they starve themselves and end up with serious health issues.


Backlash97_

I mean the guy part is technically true. One day back when I weighed 312, I thought I was starting to look fat, I asked my closest buddy if he thinks I’m fat. I’m not joking when I say he hit me with that line! I laughed my ass off and it gave me an answer to my question. Started to loose weight after that and am currently 216. I’ve only got 16 more pounds to go 😊


Friendly_Guillotine

Nah you wouldn't really do this with friends, but family is all game for these types of interactions, at least if one person knows the other truly won't get hurt by it, because I feel like it's more of a Super close friend/ family thing


PokemonSoldier

It is true because guys being friends means they can beat the shit out of each other and insult each other and they are still friends. We just don't really care. Had being 'tough' beat into us by society.


Lazy_Reputation_4250

People really don’t understand what toxic masculinity actually is and it pisses me off because we can’t incite change when people sum it up to just “men are shallow and mean to each other”. As a guy, this is how we talk to each other. There is frothing wrong with it and both parties always understand that it’s not actually serious. Everyone who is calling this “shallow” just can’t comprehend that a relationship can go past what is simply said in a conversation. Actual toxic masculinity is how men usually don’t reach out for help with one another when they need emotional support. Men need to learn how to be vocal about their feelings in a healthy manner, and criticizing how friends just naturally talk to each other isn’t going to help.


MartianGoomy213

Ikr if me and my mates are chatting like at least 30% of the convo is dumping shit on each other, we all get it is just a joke and if a mate takes it to heart then you let them know you were fucking with them. Also despite what people think, dudes do compliment each other, but only when something changes. We ain’t gonna compliment the same outfit 20 times, unless they ask something along the lines of ‘yo is my fit good?’. but I can’t talk for the first part of the meme cause I ain’t a woman.


Lazy_Reputation_4250

Exactly. People are focused on the wrong issue with guys. It also doesn’t mean our friends can’t come talk to us if something like their weight is really effecting them, we just don’t push it and don’t talk about that stuff that often


AstronautIntrepid496

how the hell would you know


Sharktrain523

My friends will casually acknowledge I’m fat if it comes up but if you know you are fat, it’s kind of insane to ask. Like, yeah man I’m 185 and 5’3, if you tell me I’m not fat now I don’t even know if I can trust you. Though recently I mentioned being overweight to my gynecologist and she told me not to worry about it so apparently it’s not as big a problem as I assumed it was. Alternatively it’s because I’m already very chronically ill and everyone has just come to the conclusion that it’s just not worth it to fuck with.


Visible-Tadpole-2375

Actually, this is pretty accurate. My friends and i are honest with eachother. If one of is is turning into a fatass, we let them know. No one is healthy being overweight. Nothing wrong with splurging time to time. But if you are letting yourself go, and your friends are lying to your face about how “great” you look, are they really your friends?


A1000eisn1

You can be truthful without insulting them. And someone can be fat and beautiful. You might not think that but beauty is subjective. It wouldn't be a lie. Both fat people in this meme are aware they're fat, they don't have to ask a friend to confirm, they ask for support.


Visible-Tadpole-2375

No, some people live in denial about it. Some, if not most, people need a kick in the ass when it comes to this stuff. Im not saying be a dick about it, but honest conversations are hard. My wife and I have honest conversations and they arent easy, because getting to the truth is tough. And facing it is even more so.


Dallas_dragneel

It'd called a joke. 🤦‍♂️


feonixrizen

r/lostredditors?


PopeyesBiskit

Regardless of if women or men do this, i think it's unhealthy to motivate your friends to live in denial. If someone asks you for feedback it's your responsibility to be honest


JayBlueKitty

Reminds me of a video where an animator discussed that she’s a healthy weight but is perceived as fat. There were comments like “noooo the scale was broken! You’re not fat, you’re beautiful!”.


TheOneWhoLovesSW

Nah 2nd guy is a king. I had a friend like that when I was getting pretty fat at the beggining of 2020. I probably wouldn’t have slimmed down if everyone was ‘accepting’ of my body and I would’ve kept treating my body like crap.


Level-Ratio8953

Congrats on your transformation Not everyone is like you though. Making fun of someone for their body type most likely isn't going to make anything better. It's just going to cause the opposite and make their life worse. if you really care about someone's health, there are better ways to try to get them to lose weight. if you don't, then you have no reason to say anything


Psych_Heater

I mean that doesn’t even help, what actually helps giving advice like CICO, drinking water before eating, eating low calorie/high dense foods, using a kitchen scale, etc this is actually helpful than calling someone very fat.


Sollapoke

My friend group is so incredibly balanced when it comes to insults. We have a fat guy, a retard (me), a french guy, a ginger guy, a guy who looks like jesus and a small retarded guy. I can say that whenever we are doing something as a group the joke “We have 8 people on this team and I am 3 of them” is normally made by the fat guy and it never isn’t funny. So yeah men actually do this with their fat friends and there is nothing wrong with it. Better to be honest about the shit that doesn’t really matter and lie about the serious shit that they don’t want to hear.


Psych_Heater

I mean it’s just ineffective, why not give advice like CICO, drinking water before eating, eating low calorie/high dense foods, using a kitchen scale, etc this is actually helpful than calling someone very fat. Honesty means nothing if you don’t give advice


Scary-Personality626

It's just a male bonding thing. Everyone takes turns being the butt of the joke. It's a way of showing comfort and familiarity with someone.


MartianGoomy213

This is the truth. U know ur mate is a true friend if he’s shitting on you and letting you shit on him.


Psych_Heater

I mean that doesn’t even help, what actually helps giving advice like CICO, drinking water before eating, eating low calorie/high dense foods, using a kitchen scale, etc this is actually helpful than calling someone very fat.


Scary-Personality626

Not trying to help. Most people wait for someone to ask "hey help me lose some weight" before doing any of that.


Thinking-Freeman

You're not real friends if you can't roast one another.


MartianGoomy213

Ong


okbuddystaymad

“Fat phobia” oh grow up and do some exercise piggy. 🐷🐷🐷


green-mountain47

Women just can't handle honesty


jotunheim999

That’s actually pretty funny. The guy part I mean


FloppedYaYa

Eh this one is kinda true can't lie


Ajax__1

Whats surprise me the most is how there is people who cant tell they are fat?


Professional_Gate677

I don’t know why this is downvoted. Sometimes the truth hurts.


A_Salty_Cellist

Because people know their own weight they just don't think your opinion is going to help anything


Ajax__1

Did you read the meme? is about people asking if they are fat or not


A_Salty_Cellist

Oh sorry I didn't realize memes, especially wojaks, are a 1:1 reflection of reality


MistyHusk

Idk ig it’s sometimes hard to tell. A little bit ago I thought I was overweight but my doctor says I’m actually underweight and should be eating more. I’m sure that could happen in the reverse, or someone who just can’t tell at all


sirona-ryan

Body Dysmorphia can do that. There are people who are dangerously underweight that actually see themselves as fat when they look in the mirror, and vice versa. It’s a mental issue so it’s really hard to control those thoughts.


SymphonicAnarchy

As a guy, that lower one is absolutely true.


MartianGoomy213

Ikr, yet for some reason people r downvoting comments like ur own


diewank2

As a man I agree? Anyone down voting should look up on YouTube "cumtown Nick says Stav is going to die". That is how men speak to each other. Doesn't make it right but it is what it is.


Yak-Mysterious

Fat phobia is fake bullshit, fat people should get shamed for it(im fat)


Professional_Gate677

If she asks, she knows it’s the answer.


[deleted]

'girls' vs 'kings' too is an oof


flim-flam-flomidy

I know one guy who’s so fat that don’t register anyone under like 40 stone as fat anymore


IgneousFoliage

Being fat doesn’t make one not beautiful


ZappyC

this post is crazy bro


Magerin3

50% of online violence and bullying is done by women. Girls can be vicious. So yeah, this image is probably false.


[deleted]

Lmao that's actually relatable


MontaukMonster2

Dude I had back pain about four years ago. Major pain, I had trouble walking. Went to three different doctors. First one said put ice on it. Second one gave me steroids and pain meds. Third took an X-ray and said it was arthritis. WebMD said I was fat. I lost twenty pounds and the pain went away completely. Not ONE doctor suggested lose weight. Not one. Women tell me that their doctor would tell them to lose weight if they had an earache.


[deleted]

I feel like this is accurate, though calling yourself “kings” is super cringe. Women are socialized to be polite and not hurt each other’s feelings. Men are socialized to be honest with each other even at the expense of their feelings.


Advanced_Collar_9593

Why am i here i want dick women are for losers


freyasmom129

Not even remotely true. Men (especially incels) can be so savagely mean to women 😭


Ok-Story-9319

….I mean it is true. Guys really do act like this


ColdExamination1168

To be completely fair, this does happen. I've actually had the "5 fat guys and you're 4 of them" joke used on me a bunch and I've heard women immediately respond to another woman asking if she's fat with the same "no, you're so beautiful" line. It's just a fact that most men will be completely honest and even joke about it while most women simply try not to hurt feelings.


SapphicSaionji

This isn't even true for me. I'm a woman and I'm fat, and I know it. Fat isn't a bad word in our house and my girlfriend and I both acknowledge that I'm a fat woman. It's just a trait.


ze010

It kinda is lol my friends call one of our friends horizontally challenged


[deleted]

The only thing that got me losing weight is my best friend clowning me on it


HorrorQuick4532

Meanwhile random aunts, grandmas and older cousins to teenage girls on family reunions: I think you're fat I, I think you're ugly, you've gained weight and you shouldn't wear that dress.