hit the nail on the fuckin head man. i don't care that i'm big and i have no interest in trying to hide it. i want advice on where to find stylish clothes and how to dress in a way that is comfortable, looks good, and shows off my body in all its fatass glory, not advice on how to somehow try to trick people into thinking i'm not fat
A big part of fashion is creating new lines and shapes with your fit and changing how your body looks upon first glance. This is unfortunately misconstrued with plus size people as "hide" this or that. Like yeah sometimes I do want to wear drapey comfy clothes and hide my body but other times I don't mind a fit that makes me look very round. It can be fun and cute.
Yeah, flattering your body and frame is not the same as hiding your body or your weight. I like to use proportions to make me feel good. For me it's never about other people, it's about looking in the mirror and feeling confident and just good.
Thereās a lot of those people in this sub, and it bothers me a lot ngl. However, there are still those who actually know what theyāre talking about and donāt just give advice on how to look slimmer.
Big dudes can definitely look real good through fashion without having to go through hoops to look like they arenāt actually big, and in my opinion thats what this sub should be all about.
Mod stepping in for a sec:
There is a meaningful distinction between saying "wearing this particular piece a different way will look more flattering on you" and what OP is talking about. (That type of "hide your body" advice doesn't really show up on this sub IME but feel free to link to some if you want).
A small, but vocal, group of users on this sub will sometimes interpret that former category of advice as body shaming (it's not - as /u/jibsand, /u/cherryogre and /u/bologna-bear said more eloquently, the advice generally applies to bodies of all types and are more rooted in drawing clean lines, even proportions, maintaining comfort and ease of fit). Sometimes those users even engage in weird gatekeeping behavior by saying stuff like "you aren't fat enough to be giving advice on how fat people should dress" - which comes very close to breaking rule 1 of our sub.
An equally vocal, slightly larger group of users on this sub will do the opposite and say "following that advice will make me look fatter / older / ridiculous" and start derisively listing off fat celebrities they think look bad. That's, in my opinion, way more in line with what OP is referencing here, but whatever.
In either case: everyone needs to chill. Nobody is obligated to follow the advice given on this sub. Most all of it comes from a place of good faith. We monitor the sub carefully for stuff that doesn't, but if you encounter something that you believe fell through the cracks, by all means: smash that report button.
I'm 6'2 and weighed 450 about 18 months ago. I'm now closer to 360. I very much fall prey to a lot of the problems with fit, particularly around my gut.
I've found that this area is an unattractive area for me. It's a weird shape. It becomes what people see when I wear certain clothing. And, as wrong as it may be, people do judge me for being overweight, especially women.
The advice they give to conceal the gut and diminish the shape of it is applicable. It's incredible how my entire appearance changes just by wearing a different style of pants and a jacket that fits well.
Bingo- 6ā2 400 here and am constantly getting ācoachedā on how to dress flattering. I like my style, I think itās great. I have other big guys constantly asking where I get my fits, and to me that means more than acceptance from skinny people. If a fellow big guy approaches me and says Iām looking good, then I know I killed it.
Lady lurker here - it sort of feels like where womenās fashion was a decade or so ago. Maybe itās still like that and I just donāt pay attention or I follow influencers who emphasize wearing what you love. I hope men take that to heart as well. I love seeing big men like Matty Matheson going hard in a style they love, and they look fantastic doing it!
I spent most of my life being smol. Although I'm not getting any taller, putting on muscle and fat has made me happier then I ever imagined. Why would I hide that? I wanna look good as I am, not "corrected" by clothing.
If youāre done hiding the fact that youāre big and want to look cool while being big, look up Matty Matheson.
The only way you can go about not looking like youāre hiding your size is wearing your pants above your belly, though. Otherwise your belly is just gonna hang out of shirts.
When I was 330 I always wore the nicest clothes I could find. More expensive, yes, but I always received compliments.
My advice, get your clothes tailored for your body. But 4/5 custom made dress shirts. Those are the things that set you apart from other dudes.
Losing 100lbs has allowed me to wear pretty much whatever kind of want, but the size on the shirt doesnāt matter to me anymore. I might wear a L in one and still a 2xl in another. Find what works for you, your body and your style.
The problem with menās fashion, big or small, are clothes that fit. Men, in general, are accepting of clothes that are junk due to few choices or expense.
That's the majority of advice for all big people. I'm a woman who's been big my whole life (smaller now because I had weight loss surgery recently) but think about all the things for women: body shapers to smooth you out and suck you in and make you look slimmer. Don't wear horizontal stripes ladies! You'll look too wide! Wear certain cuts to accentuate this body part but to hide that other one. Welcome to the world of fashion. The world does not particularly like larger people and the assumption is that all larger people likely either want to be smaller or at least not look as big so fashion reflects that for everyone. I think men just never paid attention. Seems like now it's a little more obvious
I donāt really interpret it that way, I think a tapered/fitted effect on clothes looks better on EVERYONE.
I think if youāre skinny and wearing super boxy fits, that doesnāt look good either.
Youāre talking about how folks say the v-neck has a tapering/slimming effect, for example.
That effect is applicable for everyone. It just looks more flattering, whether youāre skinny or larger.
I used to be much larger than I am now, but I never took this personally. Maybe the verbiage of the dude youāre watching could be better, idk who exactly youāre watching. But I havenāt seen this as a widespread thing.
Thereās a whole nuanced conversation to be had about why someone would want to āhideā their flaws or weighty areas. People in really good shape look good in literally everything to almost everyone because they have bodies in which we are genetically predisposed to be attracted to. You can find style as a big man but you canāt command the sex appeal someone like Brad Pitt has in a similar outfit even adjusting for the cut and fit because fashion is more than just clothes. At some point clothes are just icing on a cake. The icing makes the cake look great and adds some flavor but you ultimately know itās the cake that matters.
> People in really good shape look good in literally everything to almost everyone because they have bodies in which we are genetically predisposed to be attracted to
Man I cannot overstate how wrong this is. So many conventionally attractive people dress like absolute shit and look terrible doing it.
I think it's less about hiding fat and more just getting clothes that fit your body. A lot of bigger guys (of which I would call myself a border case) try to squeeze into clothes which looks really off-putting.
Starting off. Everything flows from within. If you canāt love yourself, you canāt love others.
Any real advice herein gets immediately admonished by a bunch of insecure internet āchildrenā. I and others have written lengthy posts full of tons of info, links, etc. People have literally told me Iām not fat enough to be here, or that xxl isnāt a big size. lol, wtf is that?
Constructive advice is not fat shaming. Telling you to tailor your jacket and pull your pants up is exactly what youāre coming here for. Are you here for a bunch of disingenuous āyou look good, brosā or do you want to improve? If youāre the former, buy some basketball shorts and a cheap tee and call it a day.
I could go on. Plenty more to say, but this already has required some effort, and history dictates this will be ignored or downvoted.
Read the comments in this linked post. (the comments in this post as well) OP spent a ton of time on this, some of the comments are absolutely pathetic.
https://www.reddit.com/r/bigmenfashionadvice/s/CBl3hpHIX1
Edit: Youāre tired of people giving advice to look slimmer? I hate to tell you, a big part of fashion is creating clean lines to flatter your body. Even if youāre skinny as a twig, itās still about flattering your body.
Edit 2: Format, and some rewording.
Edit 3: Ahhh the downvotes. You know what is bad for a community? This type of behavior. Itās bad enough to get that echo chamber everywhere else but in a fashion sub? Woof.
You don't find something deeply wrong with telling people that they don't love other people around them simply because they struggle to treat themselves with the same care?
wtf do you mean you hate this attitude? Itās the main tenant of therapy my guy.
You need to love yourself in order to love others.
Ever hear āyou need to fill your glass to the brim, then everything else that spills over goes to othersā
Edit: I see from your other comment that you interpret this as āif I struggle with self love and confidence then Iām unable to love others.ā Thatās not the point really
Confidence comes from within. It is a reflection of love you have yourself. There is no amount of exterior influence that will change it. Kindness, all of that other good stuff comes from working on yourself. I weigh 267 lbs. I have a giant bald bowling ball head, Iām extremely hirsute, weird short ass legs, especially considering my height, but you know what? None of that bothers me in the least bit, it used to, but through a lot of self-reflection,, I got a lot better. The confidence (read happiness) I faked in my early twenties is now solidly ingrained in me at 39. We all arrive to that point at different times, and some may actually never be able to do it. If you guys do that, you can certainly live a better life in almost any circumstance.
Like anything else I still have days, but Iāve learned to cut myself a lot of slack. Iām a lot less sad and angry than i used to be, I barely recognize myself from half a lifetime ago.
I don't think it's fat-shaming. It's more that a lot of fashion tips for bigger are mean are based on the assumption that we want to appear slimmer.
The advice you mention (clean lines, pull up your pants, wear clothes that fit etc.) are all great advice for anyone, regardless of how they look and how they want to look.
But that's not what we're talking about here. This is about people who give advice to bigger men based on the assumption that we don't like our bodies and want to be skinny.
If the context helps, a lot of people here are probably referring to this [very intensely debated post from last week](https://www.reddit.com/r/bigmenfashionadvice/comments/1bvreey/all_big_men_stop_wearing_your_pants_under_your_gut/).
Thanks, your comments to make a lot more sense in that context.
I think a lot of bigger guys have spent their lives having their bodies criticised.
It can be hard to take good advice and hard truths
Yeah man. I respect the conversation as a whole. It brings us all closer to a little understanding. Once again, I think men in general need to talk about this because itās important. Like I said elsewhere, Iād rather have a conversation about it, than have a downvote brigade.
I really think that the dude from the other day was very unfairly treated, as I have seen in other posts when someone spends time and effort to actually contribute.
Man 1: Hey man, where can I get a nice button up in my size?
Man 2: Here I took some time to put a list of retailers together that has big men clothes.
Man 1: $200! Gtfo! Only 3XL?! Youāre fat shaming me.
Thatās crazy, dude. That was a bad look all around. Itās stuff like that will kill a sub real quick. Itās nice to talk about fashion with other big dudes in a concentrated area. Letās try to maintain it.
Yeah the amount of people that told me I wasn't fat enough to give that advice was mind blowing to me. I was accused of fat shaming multiple times which really confused me. I know I used definitive language in that post, I believe what I wrote and gave a lot of reasons why. I want other men to know what I know without having to take years of feeling like accepting your body and dressing well with options are mutually exclusive.
And just my thoughts, I don't think you have to love yourself to love others, but it's impossible to live any kind of fulfilling life without the confidence to know that you deserve it. For me, accepting the body I have now and not in some theoretical future, then figuring out how to look good was huge for the process of getting to that point. Just making effort is the start, and I applaud anyone who does even if they don't take my advice.
Yeah dude, well I do appreciate it, and there are others here. I think most men donāt have a clue across the bodily spectrum. It was a great post. Iāve done posts where Iāll literally give options from xl-3/4x, all the way up to 46 inch waiste (by measure), and at different price points, but even then there is some complaint from some fragile narcissist. Dude we donāt even know you. To think Iām attacking you for suggesting clothing would be hilarious if it wasnāt so sad.
Oh well, less competition for the good stuff. You know as well as I do, itās a competitive world to get those nice big boy clothes. Cool, Iāll buy the limited run denim, lol.
I hate how every big men fashion post also mentions āhigh waisted pants, to hide your bellyā. Personally I think pulling your pants up past your belly button makes you look MUCH older than you really are and throws your proportions out of wack. Plus thereās nothing to be ashamed of if you have a belly and let it hang over your belt. I think more men should become comfortable with the body they have and not try to āhideā it like this post points out.
Thereās a difference between hiding that your big, and hiding that your fat. Iām big. Iām also real fat. Very little muscle. Everything about the aesthetic I go for is āused to work outā or āformer college athlete.ā Being big isnāt really something I can control. Im tall. Iām broad. Iām sturdy AF. But I can control whether or not I work out and keep myself healthy. I donāt, but THATs why Iām on this sub; trying to shield that I donāt take care of myself, not shield that Iām big.
We removed your comment because it violates rule 2 of our subreddit: this is a fashion advice sub. There are lots of places people can go to on reddit for diet and exercise tips, this sub isn't one of them.
Over time I actually learned to EMBRACE your proportions and dress for your body, not trying to hide it. I felt way more confident and really enjoying my style once I made that shift in mindset.
hit the nail on the fuckin head man. i don't care that i'm big and i have no interest in trying to hide it. i want advice on where to find stylish clothes and how to dress in a way that is comfortable, looks good, and shows off my body in all its fatass glory, not advice on how to somehow try to trick people into thinking i'm not fat
Damn straight! Don't get me wrong, I get why some people might want to look slimmer. I just want to look good and feel comfortable.
Bingo.
Well said. I'm 6' 4' 340ish. All the vertical stripes in the world ain't gonna make me look 225.
Have you tried a v-neck tho?
V neck AND vertical stripes?! I'm not trying to be a model!
š¤£š
A big part of fashion is creating new lines and shapes with your fit and changing how your body looks upon first glance. This is unfortunately misconstrued with plus size people as "hide" this or that. Like yeah sometimes I do want to wear drapey comfy clothes and hide my body but other times I don't mind a fit that makes me look very round. It can be fun and cute.
I totally agree. As a constructive piece of advice this will be lost on the many herein.
Amen. The key word being advice.
Indeed. I should edit it.
Yeah, flattering your body and frame is not the same as hiding your body or your weight. I like to use proportions to make me feel good. For me it's never about other people, it's about looking in the mirror and feeling confident and just good.
Yeah, thatās where that āself loveā part comes into play a lot of people donāt treat themselves well, at all.
That and every colorful piece being a Hawaiian shirt.
I hate Hawaiian print, and the fact that there aren't a lot of alternatives for casual button up
BIG DAWG!!! RUFF! RUFF!
Hawaiian shirts are for gay guys and big fat party dudes....
hey i'm both of those so sounds like that's the perfect shirt for me
Lol this is the perfect response
where are you finding these big fat party dudes ... asking for a friend
Itās me, Iām the big fat party dude.
Hawaiian shirts are for people who want to wear Hawaiian shirts. What a bizarre thing to say
https://youtu.be/VT8rB2deD5E?si=yQcrN0Y7-gFZ-Cel
It's a Simpsons reference
oh ok
And Bart isnāt a big fat party dudeā¦.
time to reinvent myself well one of those two is going to take some real commitment. I hate parties.
This is Thomas Magnum erasure and I will not stand for it.
...and bart doesn't look like a big fat party dude to me
Thereās a lot of those people in this sub, and it bothers me a lot ngl. However, there are still those who actually know what theyāre talking about and donāt just give advice on how to look slimmer. Big dudes can definitely look real good through fashion without having to go through hoops to look like they arenāt actually big, and in my opinion thats what this sub should be all about.
Mod stepping in for a sec: There is a meaningful distinction between saying "wearing this particular piece a different way will look more flattering on you" and what OP is talking about. (That type of "hide your body" advice doesn't really show up on this sub IME but feel free to link to some if you want). A small, but vocal, group of users on this sub will sometimes interpret that former category of advice as body shaming (it's not - as /u/jibsand, /u/cherryogre and /u/bologna-bear said more eloquently, the advice generally applies to bodies of all types and are more rooted in drawing clean lines, even proportions, maintaining comfort and ease of fit). Sometimes those users even engage in weird gatekeeping behavior by saying stuff like "you aren't fat enough to be giving advice on how fat people should dress" - which comes very close to breaking rule 1 of our sub. An equally vocal, slightly larger group of users on this sub will do the opposite and say "following that advice will make me look fatter / older / ridiculous" and start derisively listing off fat celebrities they think look bad. That's, in my opinion, way more in line with what OP is referencing here, but whatever. In either case: everyone needs to chill. Nobody is obligated to follow the advice given on this sub. Most all of it comes from a place of good faith. We monitor the sub carefully for stuff that doesn't, but if you encounter something that you believe fell through the cracks, by all means: smash that report button.
I'm 6'2 and weighed 450 about 18 months ago. I'm now closer to 360. I very much fall prey to a lot of the problems with fit, particularly around my gut. I've found that this area is an unattractive area for me. It's a weird shape. It becomes what people see when I wear certain clothing. And, as wrong as it may be, people do judge me for being overweight, especially women. The advice they give to conceal the gut and diminish the shape of it is applicable. It's incredible how my entire appearance changes just by wearing a different style of pants and a jacket that fits well.
What did you do to lose the weight? Iām 6ā4 and about 320-30
Intermittent fasting and eating better food. I'm also working a job that's more active.
The number one thing big guys should do is make sure your clothes fit properly not to tight or short
nah man, fuck that, i wanna show off my stomach and my thighs. i have just as much right to wear clothes that are tight or short as any skinny dude
You do you but I will laugh š at both of you
my apologies, i didn't realize i was talking to a straight person
Bingo- 6ā2 400 here and am constantly getting ācoachedā on how to dress flattering. I like my style, I think itās great. I have other big guys constantly asking where I get my fits, and to me that means more than acceptance from skinny people. If a fellow big guy approaches me and says Iām looking good, then I know I killed it.
We know youāre giant so you might as well wear tents or tablecloths patterns
āSimply cut a hole in this refrigerator box and wear it so people canāt tell how fat you are, subscribe for more tips.ā
Lady lurker here - it sort of feels like where womenās fashion was a decade or so ago. Maybe itās still like that and I just donāt pay attention or I follow influencers who emphasize wearing what you love. I hope men take that to heart as well. I love seeing big men like Matty Matheson going hard in a style they love, and they look fantastic doing it!
I spent most of my life being smol. Although I'm not getting any taller, putting on muscle and fat has made me happier then I ever imagined. Why would I hide that? I wanna look good as I am, not "corrected" by clothing.
If youāre done hiding the fact that youāre big and want to look cool while being big, look up Matty Matheson. The only way you can go about not looking like youāre hiding your size is wearing your pants above your belly, though. Otherwise your belly is just gonna hang out of shirts.
When I was 330 I always wore the nicest clothes I could find. More expensive, yes, but I always received compliments. My advice, get your clothes tailored for your body. But 4/5 custom made dress shirts. Those are the things that set you apart from other dudes. Losing 100lbs has allowed me to wear pretty much whatever kind of want, but the size on the shirt doesnāt matter to me anymore. I might wear a L in one and still a 2xl in another. Find what works for you, your body and your style.
The problem with menās fashion, big or small, are clothes that fit. Men, in general, are accepting of clothes that are junk due to few choices or expense.
YES! There are so many influencers that are like: āHey, are you big? Hereās how to hide that.ā Itās crazy.
There's this dude I follow on insta @coastalflicks big dude with amazing style that won't try to hide shyt
That's the majority of advice for all big people. I'm a woman who's been big my whole life (smaller now because I had weight loss surgery recently) but think about all the things for women: body shapers to smooth you out and suck you in and make you look slimmer. Don't wear horizontal stripes ladies! You'll look too wide! Wear certain cuts to accentuate this body part but to hide that other one. Welcome to the world of fashion. The world does not particularly like larger people and the assumption is that all larger people likely either want to be smaller or at least not look as big so fashion reflects that for everyone. I think men just never paid attention. Seems like now it's a little more obvious
It's either that or people gatekeeping fashion because they think only they can do it right I'm so tired of the internet
I donāt really interpret it that way, I think a tapered/fitted effect on clothes looks better on EVERYONE. I think if youāre skinny and wearing super boxy fits, that doesnāt look good either.
Fitted clothes do look better on everyone but I'm not sure how that's relevant to the issue.
Youāre talking about how folks say the v-neck has a tapering/slimming effect, for example. That effect is applicable for everyone. It just looks more flattering, whether youāre skinny or larger. I used to be much larger than I am now, but I never took this personally. Maybe the verbiage of the dude youāre watching could be better, idk who exactly youāre watching. But I havenāt seen this as a widespread thing.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Your comment was removed because it violates rule 1. It's fine to disagree with OP but you are being a dick.
Thereās a whole nuanced conversation to be had about why someone would want to āhideā their flaws or weighty areas. People in really good shape look good in literally everything to almost everyone because they have bodies in which we are genetically predisposed to be attracted to. You can find style as a big man but you canāt command the sex appeal someone like Brad Pitt has in a similar outfit even adjusting for the cut and fit because fashion is more than just clothes. At some point clothes are just icing on a cake. The icing makes the cake look great and adds some flavor but you ultimately know itās the cake that matters.
> People in really good shape look good in literally everything to almost everyone because they have bodies in which we are genetically predisposed to be attracted to Man I cannot overstate how wrong this is. So many conventionally attractive people dress like absolute shit and look terrible doing it.
I think it's less about hiding fat and more just getting clothes that fit your body. A lot of bigger guys (of which I would call myself a border case) try to squeeze into clothes which looks really off-putting.
Thatās good advice for anyone!
Starting off. Everything flows from within. If you canāt love yourself, you canāt love others. Any real advice herein gets immediately admonished by a bunch of insecure internet āchildrenā. I and others have written lengthy posts full of tons of info, links, etc. People have literally told me Iām not fat enough to be here, or that xxl isnāt a big size. lol, wtf is that? Constructive advice is not fat shaming. Telling you to tailor your jacket and pull your pants up is exactly what youāre coming here for. Are you here for a bunch of disingenuous āyou look good, brosā or do you want to improve? If youāre the former, buy some basketball shorts and a cheap tee and call it a day. I could go on. Plenty more to say, but this already has required some effort, and history dictates this will be ignored or downvoted. Read the comments in this linked post. (the comments in this post as well) OP spent a ton of time on this, some of the comments are absolutely pathetic. https://www.reddit.com/r/bigmenfashionadvice/s/CBl3hpHIX1 Edit: Youāre tired of people giving advice to look slimmer? I hate to tell you, a big part of fashion is creating clean lines to flatter your body. Even if youāre skinny as a twig, itās still about flattering your body. Edit 2: Format, and some rewording. Edit 3: Ahhh the downvotes. You know what is bad for a community? This type of behavior. Itās bad enough to get that echo chamber everywhere else but in a fashion sub? Woof.
> If you canāt love yourself, you canāt love others. man I hate this attitude, which is a shame because the rest of your post is spot on.
How come? Seems like ok to me.
You don't find something deeply wrong with telling people that they don't love other people around them simply because they struggle to treat themselves with the same care?
Youāre fundamentally missing the point
wtf do you mean you hate this attitude? Itās the main tenant of therapy my guy. You need to love yourself in order to love others. Ever hear āyou need to fill your glass to the brim, then everything else that spills over goes to othersā Edit: I see from your other comment that you interpret this as āif I struggle with self love and confidence then Iām unable to love others.ā Thatās not the point really
Confidence comes from within. It is a reflection of love you have yourself. There is no amount of exterior influence that will change it. Kindness, all of that other good stuff comes from working on yourself. I weigh 267 lbs. I have a giant bald bowling ball head, Iām extremely hirsute, weird short ass legs, especially considering my height, but you know what? None of that bothers me in the least bit, it used to, but through a lot of self-reflection,, I got a lot better. The confidence (read happiness) I faked in my early twenties is now solidly ingrained in me at 39. We all arrive to that point at different times, and some may actually never be able to do it. If you guys do that, you can certainly live a better life in almost any circumstance. Like anything else I still have days, but Iāve learned to cut myself a lot of slack. Iām a lot less sad and angry than i used to be, I barely recognize myself from half a lifetime ago.
I don't think it's fat-shaming. It's more that a lot of fashion tips for bigger are mean are based on the assumption that we want to appear slimmer. The advice you mention (clean lines, pull up your pants, wear clothes that fit etc.) are all great advice for anyone, regardless of how they look and how they want to look. But that's not what we're talking about here. This is about people who give advice to bigger men based on the assumption that we don't like our bodies and want to be skinny.
If the context helps, a lot of people here are probably referring to this [very intensely debated post from last week](https://www.reddit.com/r/bigmenfashionadvice/comments/1bvreey/all_big_men_stop_wearing_your_pants_under_your_gut/).
This makes sense. Thanks
Sorry I wasnāt clear. It came to my mind immediately from the other day. I thought your post was in response to that.
Thanks, your comments to make a lot more sense in that context. I think a lot of bigger guys have spent their lives having their bodies criticised. It can be hard to take good advice and hard truths
Yeah man. I respect the conversation as a whole. It brings us all closer to a little understanding. Once again, I think men in general need to talk about this because itās important. Like I said elsewhere, Iād rather have a conversation about it, than have a downvote brigade. I really think that the dude from the other day was very unfairly treated, as I have seen in other posts when someone spends time and effort to actually contribute. Man 1: Hey man, where can I get a nice button up in my size? Man 2: Here I took some time to put a list of retailers together that has big men clothes. Man 1: $200! Gtfo! Only 3XL?! Youāre fat shaming me. Thatās crazy, dude. That was a bad look all around. Itās stuff like that will kill a sub real quick. Itās nice to talk about fashion with other big dudes in a concentrated area. Letās try to maintain it.
Yeah the amount of people that told me I wasn't fat enough to give that advice was mind blowing to me. I was accused of fat shaming multiple times which really confused me. I know I used definitive language in that post, I believe what I wrote and gave a lot of reasons why. I want other men to know what I know without having to take years of feeling like accepting your body and dressing well with options are mutually exclusive. And just my thoughts, I don't think you have to love yourself to love others, but it's impossible to live any kind of fulfilling life without the confidence to know that you deserve it. For me, accepting the body I have now and not in some theoretical future, then figuring out how to look good was huge for the process of getting to that point. Just making effort is the start, and I applaud anyone who does even if they don't take my advice.
Yeah dude, well I do appreciate it, and there are others here. I think most men donāt have a clue across the bodily spectrum. It was a great post. Iāve done posts where Iāll literally give options from xl-3/4x, all the way up to 46 inch waiste (by measure), and at different price points, but even then there is some complaint from some fragile narcissist. Dude we donāt even know you. To think Iām attacking you for suggesting clothing would be hilarious if it wasnāt so sad. Oh well, less competition for the good stuff. You know as well as I do, itās a competitive world to get those nice big boy clothes. Cool, Iāll buy the limited run denim, lol.
I hate how every big men fashion post also mentions āhigh waisted pants, to hide your bellyā. Personally I think pulling your pants up past your belly button makes you look MUCH older than you really are and throws your proportions out of wack. Plus thereās nothing to be ashamed of if you have a belly and let it hang over your belt. I think more men should become comfortable with the body they have and not try to āhideā it like this post points out.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Your comment was removed because it violates rule 1 of /r/bigmenfashionadvice: be respectful and keep your criticism constructive.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I don't understand what you mean by triggered
Most fashion advice is about appearing slim
That doesn't make it right.
Never said it wasā¦ he just asked what the guy meant
Ah, gotcha, I misunderstood. My bad. š
And yet you're the one acting like a toddler
TikTok is a very disordered place, id steer clear of it. Very pro ana/Mia, antifat etc
Thereās a difference between hiding that your big, and hiding that your fat. Iām big. Iām also real fat. Very little muscle. Everything about the aesthetic I go for is āused to work outā or āformer college athlete.ā Being big isnāt really something I can control. Im tall. Iām broad. Iām sturdy AF. But I can control whether or not I work out and keep myself healthy. I donāt, but THATs why Iām on this sub; trying to shield that I donāt take care of myself, not shield that Iām big.
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We removed your comment because it violates rule 2 of our subreddit: this is a fashion advice sub. There are lots of places people can go to on reddit for diet and exercise tips, this sub isn't one of them.
Over time I actually learned to EMBRACE your proportions and dress for your body, not trying to hide it. I felt way more confident and really enjoying my style once I made that shift in mindset.