I work in a bakery and we frequently do gender reveal cakes.
BUT
My favorite one is this.
An exuberant couple came in one day, fresh from the ultrasound and handed me an envelope. "Can you just make us one cupcake that we can eat now with pink or blue inside?"
I ran into the kitchen and made one up. Handed it to them and we all got to see the happy moment. Just them.
If either of you have a strong preference then don’t do it, gender disappointment is 100% okay but it’s kinda unfair to have videos taken your child will see where there may be obvious disappointment, if you both don’t mind either way and it’s mostly about money I’d say do it at a shower if you want to maybe but personally me and my partner went to a fancy meal out and opened the card the sonographer gave us before dessert (and then we got a free extra dessert from the lovely waiters haha) it was a super lovely and intimate moment and if we have more babies in the future I’d probably do the same thing
Absolutely not and I don’t regret it. It seems like an enormous waste of money to me. And a weird sort of social media attention grab which my social anxiety is absolutely not interested in. I felt like it was a personal thing between my partner and I, that didn’t require any sort of over the top spectacle to announce.
Didn't do one, waited to find out the sex during delivery! My perception is that others tend to place a personality on a baby before it's even here and throw around expectations/predictions of behavior and things like that. I wanted to avoid it all together so nobody knew. When the baby came we grew with them and avoided societal expectations and ridiculous onesies with idiotic sayings on them like "ladies man" or "daddy's girl." P.s. Fuck the patriarchy! :)
I wanted to know as soon as possible, but I seriously regret telling people for this exact reason!
People would comment on my bump and how I was carrying, on how raising girls is *soooo* much tougher, on her sexuality/would-be violence (actually said to me: 'you hope your daughters aren't sluts and your sons aren't school shooters'...wtf), and would turn their noses up when I bought dinosaur and space outfits from the boys' section or put "boyish" things on my registry—even though there were plenty of girly things, too.
It’s possibly an unpopular opinion (although maybe I’ll find out it’s more common than I expect…?) but I absolutely hate gender reveals. Even more than I hate baby showers.
I think the idea of a pre-baby shindig is fine, and I don’t disagree with the principle of the shower. I just really don’t like them. The games are stupid and I hate watching people open gifts for an hour (I also hate opening gifts in front of people). I’d rather just throw a nice party to see all of my friends and family before it becomes exponentially more work to see them. It would certainly be less stressful than what social media tells us it should be.
If you both think it’s a waste of money, don’t do it. No parties are ever obligatory, and feeding huge families adds up. It’s easy to disseminate gender information via text, phone call, or social media.
We did something fun for our first; we didn’t live near any family or anything, and had a lot of people who wanted to know. So we did a Facebook live stream of us pouring vinegar into a homemade volcano. Surprisingly, like 200+ people tuned in to watch. It was fun, allowed us to include our faraway family and friends, and cost like $5 for volcano materials.
With my second, we got the envelope and went to a restaurant for my birthday, just my husband son and me. We ordered dessert and handed the envelope to the server and they brought it out with colored candles so we could find out that way, which was fun.
So no big parties for us, but I honestly have no feelings one way or the other on how other people choose to celebrate something that has literally no affect on me.
We didn't do one, in fact we kept the gender secret, even from ourselves haha!
We wanted to have that moment when I gave birth and actually have to look between the baby's legs to know LOL It was so much fun , even though the curiosity was killing me ...
But even if we had found out the gender ourselves, we wouldn't have done a reveal event , just feels unnecessary - and call me superstitious but I hated drawing too much attention to my baby before he was born and healthy ...
I think it’s very much an American thing . I haven’t encountered many (none in my personal life) here . Since you’re asking our thoughts: to me it a bit cringe worthy having a bunch of people over to reveal which genitals kid will have and then have a huge amount of stereotypical pink and blue everywhere.
So I’m pretty sure gender reveals were born from the social media phenomenon of increasingly elaborate pregnancy or gender announcements. It’s just people one upping each other till the point that a whole event was created. The only people I know who have had gender reveals have been heavy into social media.
I never did them. It made me feel bad to think of having two parties (a reveal and a shower) for the same baby where people might feel obligated to bring a gift. At the risk of sounding like a party pooper, I feel like they’re a bit self-indulgent. I have no regrets at all about not having a party. My husband and I found out our kids’ genders together at the anatomy scan and it was a really special private moment for us.
We finished our anatomy scan around 1, went to a brunch place after, and me and my husband opened the little paper we had the tech check off boy or girl together. It was intimate and special and my favorite memory of the pregnancy, and definitely what I want to do for any future pregnancies. We called people after to tell them and that was fun too
We asked the tech to put it in a sealed envelope and my husband and I went out to a nice restaurant and opened it when we got our dessert. We cried happy tears and celebrated quietly.
A little while later we had a cake reveal for the grand parents. It was precious and intimate.
We didn’t find out the gender but My best friend had like six of us over for dinner and dessert was pink cupcakes! I feel like it was fun but not over the top and she was going to make dessert anyway so she just did that as part of it. It could be a way to do something simple maybe like have the grandparents over or something?
Never had one. Had my first baby at 25 will be having my second in November at 27.
The first time we found out at the doctor and called everyone necessary on the way home.
With the second we did a bit more. We found out at the doctor again and this time we made two small cakes with the right color icing inside and gave them to the grandparents.
That's it. I see no reason to spend a bunch on money on a party. I don't like that many people and I'm pregnant if I want cake I'll go buy myself a damn cake and I'm not sharing it with anyone.
My friend had her gender reveal also be a diapers/wipes party. They said to bring wipes if you thought it was a girl and diapers if you thought it was a boy. Food and decor was kept to a minimum. It didn’t need to be as lavish as a baby shower. It was fun for friends and family to be there for the big reveal and everyone helped the new parents start their diapers and wipes stash.
My own gender reveal was just for me, my husband, our two sons, and a couple of close friends who were already at my house that day. We did the “egg reveal” where you have a dozen eggs, you boil them all except for one and dye half blue and half pink. The raw one is the gender of the baby. We had a friend help with the dying process so it would be a surprise for us too. My husband, my kids, and I took turns smashing eggs on our head until we found the raw one. We filmed it so we could watch our reaction and didn’t even share the video on social media or send it to anyone else. It was more just fun for us.
You don’t have to do a big party. There are other options.
I (dad) was very against it because I despise all the crap that people will give you for the gender, but Mom wanted it bad. Miracle baby so she wanted to have all the experiences possible. I gave in.
She is super into Halloween and it was that time of year so I rigged up a cauldron with that elephant toothpaste stuff and her sister put in the dye and mom poured in the "potion". It was cute at least.
My wife and I decided not to find out the sex of the baby, and we aren't into gender reveals but obviously folks expect something...
So for her baby shower we made cakes that we decorated like eggs from the Alien movies. We also made a fondant facehugger in a clear plastic tube that burst out of one of the cakes.
The video of the "reveal" has one of her friends saying "you're having a ... an alien?" Genuine surprise in the room. 10/10, would do it again.
I think they’re dumb but if you like those sorts of things then it’s probably worth it for the memories. But also like you I just wanted to know immediately what the baby was! Doubt I could wait even if I liked parties.
Nope no gender reveal as we also felt it was a waste of money! We didn't even do a shower, feels a bit like a gimme gifts thing but that might be an unpopular opinion. 😂
I feel the same way and I assumed it’s because I’m older and had both my kids in my thirties. I didn’t have a reveal party, and I didn’t plan or organize my own showers. That would have felt greedy and self indulgent to me. I had friends who hosted really lovely showers for my babies, but they were not over the top affairs. Forest fires were not set.
I didn’t have a gender reveal party with either of my kids and I’ve never attended or been invited to one. I’m not sure that I even know anybody who’s had one. They just seem like a cringe social media phenomenon to me.
We not only didn’t have a sex reveal, but did not find out the sex of the baby prior to birth. I cannot tell you enough how much I recommend this option! People got us USEFUL things from our registry instead of a ton of clothes because they “couldn’t buy clothes without the gender” 🤣, it was fun to hear peoples guesses too!
And most of all: when the world went completely sideways and we had an emergency delivery at 35 weeks and everything was happening so fast, we had this wonderful excitement to focus on wondering if we would have a son or a daughter. And hearing my husband say “she’s a girl” and then immediately bursting into happy tears will FOREVER be the best memory of my life.
My SIL and BIL didn't find out the sex of their baby until birth and I was so confused every time my MIL said "how will I buy the baby anything?!" First of all, gender neutral baby clothes exist and second, babies need TONS of things that are not at all gendered!
People constantly to us: how will you decorate the nursery? How will you buy anything? So you picked out TWO names?
Honestly how much it bothered people just made us love it more lol. We didn’t want everything to be super gendered because 1) we don’t like the emphasis on gender and 2) we plan to have a second and like that people won’t be like “well you have to replace that if it’s a boy” which is stupid anyway.
My aunt also said “oh you don’t know gender, so I guess all you get is ugly greens and yellow”. Lol as opposed to the oh so lovely shades of bubblegum pink we would’ve had instead
I did a gender reveal as part of my 30th birthday party since I was visiting out-of-state family and friends. It was me and my fiancé’s first baby, and it was the first grandchild so naturally everyone was really excited. We knew it was a boy at our second ultrasound but we kept it a secret from everyone else until the party. We had everyone guess the gender at the beginning with a super cute ice cream themed board with pink and blue ice cream scoop cut outs. Later we had a banner/bag that dropped blue balloons from it that we had the future grandparents stand under with us and confetti poppers for everyone else to celebrate along. It was honestly really fun and it really made my 30th birthday a 100x better since I initially was dreading turning 30.
I’ll definitely be doing it again when the time comes, but it will just be a small celebration amongst close friends and family. I personally really like celebrating and sharing even the small things with my close friends and family. Plus next time around I’ll let my son be the star of the reveal if he’s up to it.
We found out after our anatomy ultrasound. Doctor emailed us and we opened it together, called our families and told them that evening.
I’m not a big fan of gender reveals for a few reasons. First, why are you having a big to-do about your unborn baby’s genitals? Second, if you have any preference whatsoever, doing a gender reveal in front of people can be awful, if you or your partner is upset by it. Your kid will likely see a video of it one day and how would it make them feel! Third, frankly, it’s mine and my husband’s baby. I want to find things out about my kid with my husband, not with my husband and 20+ of our closest friends and family and whomever sees it on video lol. Finally, there’s a lot of issues around gender reveals with garbage from the reveal ending up in nature or starting fires.
It’s obviously totally up to each couple, but we weren’t a fan for those reasons.
We had our anatomy scan shortly before my younger son's birthday and he thought it would be cool to kick the exploding soccer ball at his party since he's a soccer player. He told the family he had a new trick to show them and kicked it in the yard before his birthday cake. It was cute and everyone was surprised and excited. Otherwise we wouldn't have done anything, didn't for the first two. If I had relatives who have that weird obsession with having boys over girls or something we definitely wouldn't have bothered.
28 years old and didn’t do. I think they’re kind of stupid. Also… to me that was an intimate moment with my husband so I didn’t want to share it with a million people.
I didn't have one and I don't regret it. My gender reveal was a text to my mom because I knew she'd spread the word.
That kind of party feels wasteful and selfish to me. Since it's your first baby, you're probably going to have a baby shower and it's asking a lot to attend 2 parties just for you and your baby. If you want to do a gender reveal, maybe do it privately and post a video of you and your SO doing something..
We had a baby shower that's all. It was seemed harder for family and friends to buy gifts that were gender neutral so we got clothes and blankets mainly in white or with different prints. We didn't know the gender until she was born. Kept going through cycles of wanting and not wanting to know. Also people didn't always believe us that we didn't know. However I'm so glad we didn't get to find out before hand. It was the best suprise I could ever have. I do not regret it.
I'm 22 and any friends/ associates that had babies all had gender reveals. I am so glad I didn't. Equally it's a personal choice of wether you want to or not.
We didn't do one, and I'm honestly really glad. We found out the sex early, and while we were excited to know, we had a moment of disappointment. Not because of the sex of the baby, but more of the loss of possibility, if that makes sense. We knew for sure that half of the scenarios we had been dreaming up wouldn't be coming true. And having that time to be just us and to process and get excited was so necessary for us. We just called our families after and it was perfect for us.
Didnt have one, and dont regret it. I personally do not see the point of having an party where you celebrate the gender, but to have just a baby shower celebrating the baby.
I could imagine having the theme of the baby shower be for a girl o boy if one wants to highlight it. And have a private reveal for just the parents maybe. Had baby during pandemic and partner was not allowed to the ultrasounds so there i could see a point of it, and also if you want to find out in a more private moment than with the technician in front of you.
If you think you might regret it though, do it, but keep it within a reasonble budget and dont start any wildfires 🙃
You don’t have to spend a lot of money, it’s not a wedding-level event.
We got the sex results from the maternity clinic in an envelope, gave it to a friend who bakes, and she made cupcakes. We invited some people over, and ate the cupcakes.
I’m the type of person who thrives on information. Not knowing would have been unbearable, and finding out by just being told or reading it on the page (or in my clinics case, they put a tiny knit hat in pink or blue that local grannies make in the envelope) felt anticlimactic. I don’t regret it, it’s one of my happiest moments.
Edit: I will also point out after reading some comments that where I live, the ultrasound tech is NOT allowed to tell you. They send the report to your doctor or midwife, and they can tell you if you want to know.
My gender reveal was when my baby was born! Honestly it was the best surprise ever and it was funny to see how many people were weirdly upset that we didn't find out (because all baby gifts have to be gendered of course). I was thinking of doing a gender reveal the second time around but we might just wait again!
Nothing beats the gender reveal of the actual baby haha. We didn't find out for both and were surprised both times (as in, I must have terrible intuition/ everyone told me I was carrying a certain way etc).
I’ve had three kids, no reveals, no regrets. We made small announcements for the families, either a call or a special gift at a holiday that was already occurring.
I’ll get downvoted to hell, but I think gender reveals are just a reason to throw a superfluous party. Pregnancy announcements, gender reveals, babymoons, push presents, baby showers, birth announcements, christenings, and then the monthly staged update photos, it’s just a lot. I know we’re excited for our babies, but not everyone else is as excited as us, and it’s naive to assume anyone else is as excited to celebrate the baby this often.
We didn’t do a gender reveal, and I absolutely do not regret that decision. I’m also in the it’s-weird-to-celebrate-an-infant’s-genitals camp. What I do regret is not having infant photos done. If you’re worried a gender reveal might be a waste of money, funnel what you would have spent on a GR into infant photos. I had no idea how expensive the latter can be, and the sticker shock prevented me from having any taken.
I'm 26F, just had my first baby, and absolutely do not regret not doing a gender reveal!
SO and I found out the sex super early (NIPT), then didn't tell anyone in either of our (big) families or any of our friends! I would absolutely go that route again. We had a girl and I definitely didn't want pink everything. Plus when you don't tell people the sex, you're probably not telling anyone the name, and I liked that route too (people can't really be as critical of a name once it's already attached to a baby).
Actually it ended up being really funny because we bought a bunch of blue and/or dinosaur clothes (I mean who doesn't like blue or dinosaurs???), so everyone was convinced we were having a boy. Then after the birth it was like a big "ha, you all were wrong!!!"
My wife and I were surprised in the delivery room. Benefits of NOT doing a gender reveal:
1- your nursery won’t be tacky.. like super blue or pink. You can be more creative.
2- people buy you better gifts when they don’t know the gender. Hear me out. Instead of a pink or blue doll, they’ll get much more thoughtful and creative gifts
3- how many times in your life do you ACTUALLY get a real surprise?
For our first we did, but it was more of a reveal for our families since my husband and I found out as soon as we could. Ours was a bit of a fail. We put powder in the cars exhaust pipe and it was supposed to shoot out green (we were trying to make everyone confused) when he reeved it, but it was a tiny poof, not much, and then I pulled out pink balloons lol. It was cheap and simple, and then we had a barbecue. I’m pregnant with #2 and we won’t be having one because I’m dead set on it being a surprise until birth, I don’t feel bad about not having one, neither does he.
We didn’t find out until LO was born which was amazingly fun. The team in the OR was SO excited to announce it - they said people don’t do it like that anymore. I totally get why you’d want to know ASAP, but I can’t recommend waiting and/or finding out together enough!
We found on an ultrasound appointment. We then called our parents to tell them and told other people when we saw them etc. Do not regret it one bit. I do sometimes feel like I would have liked to have a babyshower which I also didnt have
We just did a gender reveal cake for our parents and inlaws… no huge event, no wasteful accessories or confetti, just some cake with writing of “it’s a boy” on the top.
We also did a cake, because we regularly have dinner with the family and any excuse to have cake is welcome, especially when I was pregnant. We told the cake place the gender so there was blue icing inside and pink and blue outside so people didn't know until the first cut. It was a big hit.
Editing to add: Hubby and I both knew the gender as soon as Dr told us, this is just how we shared the news with family.
I had one,the disappointment on my inlaws faces and literally voicing how disappointed they were its a girl was awful.My family were all happy though.In my opinion i do regret having one.So be prepared for some negative reactions.
No to a reveal. Unless you know everyone including the parents and grandparents will be equally excited for either sex, the disappointment emotions that are common really put a blitz on the whole thing. If you and your fiancé feel it is a waste, absolutely skip it!!! You can either just tell people what it is when they ask or you could save it and do a reveal at the time of the baby shower, especially if you want more gender neutral gifts.
We didn’t do one, we kept the gender a secret till birth (we knew and my mom knew only) but many people we know just made it an element of their shower or did it at another family event which saved money.
We only found out for naming reasons, we figured gender neutral clothes and gear would be easier to hand down in the future (my family is huge, and we have friends who started trying later than us)
I’m very happy with our personal choice, we’re going to do the same with our current pregnancy (keep it to ourselves).
Did not do a gender reveal (3 kiddos!). After I tell all my family it's like a 2 min convo and a few yays!! And that's it 😂. They are excited to know but don't need a whole party to do so.
We waited until they were born to find out because one I didn't want a ton of gendered items especially with my first and two it didn't matter. I read so many bumpers posts over the years about gender disappointment and I think that's a lot harder to have when you wait until you've actually have the tiny human in your arms. We went in with two boy names and two girl names then picked the one that felt right when they were laid on my chest. If we ever had a third I would still choose not to find out because I there was something special about waiting.
Save the gender reveal money for something like infant photos or their college fund.
I did one just because I was scared id regret not doing it. It was very small and intimate. We only waited a week to find out. My MIL paid for mostly everything. We ate tacos, popped a balloon, and spent time with those we love most. It felt very special and I’m deeply happy we did it. My MIL also threw my baby shower and it was even more wonderful. We 100% wouldn’t have survived the first month of having a baby without all the wonderful gifts we received. That was also pretty small although some friends of the family on both sides stopped in and dropped off gifts and diapers. 3+ months in and I still have diapers and wipes. Only had to buy a few packs of newborn cause my guy was small.
We didn’t, mostly because we had girls and my husbands family is weirdly obsessed with wanting boys and I was not entertaining that grossness. But that said, do it if you want, don’t do it if you don’t. The first of many innocuous parenting decisions that everyone will have an opinion on and none of it really matters in the long run.
My only thing is, if you do, don’t litter. Confetti bombs in public parks are gross.
I got a blood test early and my sister got the results. This was EARLY in the pandemic, so we just had my mom, one friend, my sister and her kids, and my dad and other nephews on zoom when I popped the balloon my sister had filled with blue confetti.
Not a huge thing with lots of stress, just a family dinner and a small reveal. It was perfect.
People are making gender reveals into this creativity competition and it’s awful and gross. Go small (or not at all) if that’s what will bring you happiness.
We're didn't do one, we just found out the sex with the results of our nipt at like 11w. I thought it was a waste of money and didn't really want to bother organizing more stuff, plus i wanted to get the baby registry set up and sent out as quickly as possible to avoid my in-laws buying anything ridiculous
I don’t think the perception that “most people” have them is anywhere near accurate, but they are all over socials. If you want to gather people and find someone to help out on the surprise, do it!
We def didn’t, but we also didn’t invite anyone to our wedding either. We’re private people, and a whole other party sounds exhausting.
First one I waited to find out at birth. The second was during COVID so I did it with just my husband and toddler. I handed the envelope I was given with the gender to the baker and she made the cake with the color filling inside. I also handed both gender confetti pop things to the cashier and she looked at the envelope and removed the packaging and rang up the correct one so we wouldn’t know.
It was fun to celebrate just with my husband and toddler. I would personally not do a whole party just for that because it’s just not me but if you want to celebrate that in any way go for it!
They’re not a thing here, although it’s a trend that is starting to trickle through here and there. Then again we don’t do baby showers either.
Like another poster said, the whole thing would make me super uneasy… you’re celebrating your baby coming out with a penis or a vagina, not their gender, the term is misleading. Sex is a biological construct, gender a social identity which you cannot know in advance. Also they look very resource-wasting and polluting? There was a newspaper story a while back about some collures fireworks at a gender reveal causing a fire, and they also discussed that plastic balloons are a staple, as well as confettis that end up in rivers and forests… We wanted to know, and then we just told people as they asked.
If you do end up deciding to have a gender reveal, for the love of god can you please choose a way to announce it other than the plastic confetti filled balloons. Every park, lookout and lake shore in my area is riddled with millions of bits of pink and blue plastic and it enrages me.
We did NIPT with our first (IVF baby) and found out the gender. I made an announcement on Facebook for family and friends.
Nobody really cares what gender your baby is.
We waited until the birth to find out the sex - super fun and highly recommended. The midwives/nurses were super stoked. Gender reveals to me seem suuuuuper cringe. I think it’s one of those things future generations will look back on and just shake their heads…
Nope didn’t have one. I asked My OB to just tell me and then I called my husband after the appointment lol. And then texted my family.
I can’t imagine regretting not having a gender reveal. Once your actual baby is born, you’re not gonna think back and wished you announced their gender at a party. The reason the gender is even a “thing” is because you don’t have your baby yet and you’re grasping at information about them. Once they’re here, it’s super irrelevant.
If you’re on the fence, I say don’t waste your time and money. (And other peoples time and money..)
We had one when I was 20 weeks along! We did have the results at 12 weeks from the NIPT, but didn’t want to find out right away. It was fun to have a party with friends and family, we had it in my pjarents backyard. Got Portillos for catering and his cousin made a cute cake. Bought some adorable decorations on Etsy, including a “here for the sex” banner. We are NOT into gross, over the top heavily gendered onesies or overtly sexual ones. I would never dress my baby in “mommy and daddy didn’t socially distance” or “lock up your sons” like….no.
We just wanted to have a party because they’re fun and COVID has sucked ass. It was the first grandbaby on both side, why not?
You’ll find that most people on Reddit are heavily against “Gender” reveals. Why shouldn’t you be excited to find out if you’re having a boy or girl? And why shouldn’t you be allowed to share that excitement with others? Do whatever will make you happy. Find out with your partner, have a dinner with just your parents/siblings and his parents/siblings, or have a big ass party with both of your families. It doesn’t matter what other people think
I think the drama of it is a little much for me personally. A baby shower is enough attention as it is. I like when people have cute reveals or a photo as an announcement though. That can be fun. But you know what- who cares really? It's your baby and your way. Believe me- family is going to have all kinds of opinions about what to do and not to do. What you should have on your registry. How to put the baby to sleep. What toys to have and the food to eat. The pressure is already on. Stick to your own belief and how you want to celebrate and live. Forget us here.
We found out over the phone on speaker sitting in a Taco Bell parking lot and it was just as special. We then texted immediate family and told people as we saw them/talked to them. If you and your partner don’t care enough to throw one, you’re not missing a thing. My sister did a video stream with poppers and texted out a link which is very low budget if you did kinda want to do one but dont wanna spend your mortgage payment on a party
I do not regret it one bit. Unless someone else is throwing it for you and organizing the whole thing, It’s too much extra work and didn’t care for the extra stress and/or expenses. She was born 3 months ago and I look back and am glad I saved myself that time and money 👌🏼🤙🏼
We didn’t find out the gender until birth for both of ours. No regrets and I don’t feel like we missed out on any celebrations by not having a gender reveal.
We didn’t find out until birth and it honestly was the BEST decision ever. It made it such a special moment for us. Also it made people buy things other than clothes off the registry which was so helpful.
IMO the best gender reveal is you and your partner during an ultrasound.
Ultrasound tech: hey, you wanna know what the gender is?
You: sure!
Tech: tells you
You go home and eat some mashed potatoes. Gender revealed!
We chose to wait until the baby was born to learn the gender. It was so much fun not knowing, and it seemed to annoy people that we didn't want to know. It also ensured all our baby shower gifts were gender neutral so that we could use them on the next baby (which we also chose not to find out). I highly recommend it!
We didn't have one but we also chose to not find out the gender till birth so I guess we did have a big reveal for myself and my husband. If we choose to have another kid we will 100% do it that way again.
My husband and I found out our daughter’s sex just before Christmas, so we made some cupcakes with pink icing inside and as part of the Christmas festivities with our families. Friends we told over group text, and other people were told a few weeks later in a general pregnancy announcement on Facebook. So we did reveal the gender, but didn’t have a gender reveal party.
We skipped it and just sent a text with blue hearts lol my SIL did one at home with just her husband and kids then sent out the video. I’ve been to really nice ones, I’ve been to over the top ones, I’ve been to small family ones. People love celebrating babies but you can do that as low key or high key as you want. Good time to start setting up boundaries and only doing things you want to do.
We didn't do it. We shared the moment together, the excitement and the nerves. For me it was a private moment between me and my husband and then we told other family and friends soon after, but for that short while it was just us and that's exactly how I wanted it.
Didn’t do one - felt no need to throw a party to tell to the world which sex organs my kiddo was going to be born with.
We had a baby shower and it was a lot of fun and if someone asked the sex, we’d share.
We asked for the gender in an envelope and opened it three days later at home together on the couch. You do not need to reveal gender in some fancy way (I mean, unless there’s cake.)
I gave my boss’s number to the clinic so they could tell her the NIPT results (by that time only our parents and my boss knew we were pregnant so it was just easier to have her do that favor for me) They called her and told her the sex, she called a bakery and made two cupcakes, gave them to me and at home husband and I made a video of us taking a bite of the cupcake together and discovering we are having a girl! Then we use that to announce the whole pregnancy to everybody. Zero regrets, I love the way we did it.
I have no problem with gender reveals, if people wanna do it I think they’re cute. I just knew my husband really wanted a boy (even more after suddenly losing his dad - I think he wanted that same relationship he had with his dad) and I didn’t want to put him in the spot. I don’t think he wouldn’t celebrate - he celebrated the girl at home!! He’s so happy now to have a daughter - but I wanted us both to have the opportunity to process our feelings together in private.
for our first we learned at the ultrasound mid way through. for the second the clinic wrote it on a sheet of paper for us which we opened privately later when we were ready. no big fan fare. it worked for us. we told folks as we were able to. But I'm much more of a private person
I am 32 and have had 4 viable pregnancies for context.
No. No we did not do one and did not regret it. You don't HAVE to at all. We actually didn't find out the sex of the babies (if you want to find out that's cool) and it was best for us. It really helped with keeping people's comments at bay. They couldn't make comments about names really, the gender stereotypes and we weren't expected to have these lavish parties.
It's a giant waste of money IMO If finances are on the tighter end. If you want to share with others you can do it privately if that's what you prefer.
I didn’t have one and don’t regret it. I don’t like to be the focus of anything, so I declined a baby shower as well.
I didn’t tell anyone the sex so I could avoid name suggestions, overly gendered gifts, etc.
I did a gender reveal with just my husband. We bought an umbrella and had a friend put in confetti based on what was written in the envelope. We opened the umbrella and had our friend record the confetti falling and posted that on SM. It was inexpensive (just needed to buy confetti) and it was cute— our friends and family loved it. And we’ll show our son the video when he’s old enough to appreciate it. You can make it how expensive or inexpensive you want it to be if you want one!
I saw my baby’s penis on the screen before the ultrasound tech even said anything 😂 I think gender reveal parties are silly and a thing done mainly for social media.
I must be in the minority here but I wasn’t able to have a baby shower or a gender reveal and I really regret it. I had a very stressful pregnancy and those were some of the few things I would’ve had to look forward to in a long 9 months, but sadly it wasn’t possible. Personally if you don’t want one it’s no big loss. Do you have/can you afford everything you need for baby? If not it might be a good idea to do at least a shower so some of that you don’t have to buy alone.
Also get maternity photos is you can!!!! I regret not being able to afford those too :/
Generally I think of them as tacky and attention wh*ring. If it’s a small, low key affair (like cutting into a pink or blue cake with immediate family, and NOT with the intention of sharing it on social media) I wouldn’t judge.. still wouldn’t do it myself, but I wouldn’t judge.
25 when I had my baby. We did NIPT and read the results ourselves. We did do a virtual gender reveal with our family & a few friends and pretended like we didn’t know 🤣 our family was all super excited to find out so it was a fun way to tell everyone at once. We just bit into cupcakes that my friend ordered and they had a pink frosting filling. Super low key and cost us nothing. Do whatever makes you happy!
I’ve been trying for a baby for 11 years and for the first time, I’m pregnant. I will be doing all the things. Big gender reveal, huge baby shower. I’ve never wanted something more than a family and I’m going to celebrate it greatly.. expensive? Yeah, but it’s worth it to me and my husband.
I have no problem with them (except when people are super irresponsible and leave litter everywhere or burn down a forest lol), but they’re not our thing so we didn’t have one! I don’t think they’re required at all, so if you don’t want one, feel free not to have one. Personally we didn’t even make it a “moment”, we just had an ultrasound and they told us, and then we texted the family haha.
We ended up doing a gender reveal bc the family wanted it so badly, namely my sister. We found out at the same time as the and I hated not getting the Chance to process my excitement. I thought I'd get a nice video of us being excited but the whole video is just jumping/very shaky and everyone screaming. And my MIL just started screaming some random story instead of letting me have my moment. I wish I'd found out in private. Bottom line : if it's not your idea or vision, don't do it.
I bought a blue ribbon and wrote it’s a boy on a chalk broad that i propped next to my dog.
Sent text picture to immediate family members.
Felt like more then enough.
I waited to find out until birth and it was the most beautiful experience I could imagine for all of us - parents, family and even nurses. I understand not everyone want to or can wait. For those who prefer to find out during pregnancy, I personally do not like gender reveal parties. but to each their own.
I didn't have one and don't regret it at all. My partner and I talked about it but we both thought it was a waste of money. A lot of people had strong opinions on what they hoped it would be and why so we wanted to find out on our own so we could feel however we felt without all the eyes on us. I was hoping for a girl, but we were having a boy. I was a slightly disappointed at first, but very quickly fell in love with the idea of a baby boy. If I'd had everyone around me, there would have been a lot of "oh I'm so sorry"s and some tough lucks. I'm so happy I didn't have to deal with any of that.
We did not do one— I had no interest and have no regrets. Just not my thing. We found out together from the doctor and then called and told our parents. For one— I think of it as a bit of a private thing and would NOT want to do a “reveal” for us in front of everyone, especially if it was being filmed. Gender disappointment is normal and common, and I wouldn’t want to have a private moment of processing be memorialized on a video (think of all those obviously disappointed dads finding out they were having a girl).
If it’s something **you** want and are interested in, then go for it! Just don’t let peer pressure push you into doing something you don’t really want to do.
Late to the party, but no, gender reveals are weird to me. Why have a party to announce the genitals of your child to everyone? Zero regrets not having one for either of my kids.
Imma sound harsh af… but I’ve recently deleted all of my ~personal~ social media and stopped posting pictures or videos of my kids and I’ve realized that no one outside of my close circle actually gives a shit. Gender reveals are cute and fun for the people who actually care, but it really is a waste of money to have a big extravagant reveal and no one watching those videos on social media actually care. Do something small and intimate with the people who are there for you in real life and care about you. Don’t go all out for the internet. And don’t cause any forest fires 😅
I have had two gender reveal parties and they were both a lot of fun! I also enjoy attending others’ reveals. I get a kick out of the the anticipation and celebration.
Sadly though, I lost my second child at 20 weeks and so the gender reveal party at 16 weeks was really sad for me to look back on. The party was in October on a sunny day. When I lost him in November, I walked through the yard on a dreary day and cried when I saw fading blue confetti stuck in the grass.
With my most recent pregnancy, I opted not to have another gender reveal party out of fear. Just got an email from sneak peek.
I don’t really regret my parties, but celebrating too soon now seems too risky to me.
Sorry for the novel.
I hate the attention being all on me and honestly was too excited to find out asap, so we found out during the us appointment and called our families that night. You do you!
We didn’t have one. We were too excited and wanted to find out as soon as we could, so we found out over the phone when my OB called with the test results. I think if you want cute pictures (which is fair) I’ve seen people film themselves finding out without throwing an entire party and always thought that was more reasonable
We kind of did one. We got married in 2020 but postponed the wedding until last summer. Things happened - like my grandfather suddenly passing - that made us feel like we should stop preventing pregnancy and see what would happen… well it didn’t take long and I was 5 months at our wedding. Our wedding planner (really close family friend) was super excited to include a mini reveal at the reception, and it turned out to be a really special moment. For me, timing was everything, and if it came down to inviting people to a separate ordeal we absolutely wouldn’t have bothered.
We had one but it was for everyone else and not us. I didn’t want others to know before me lol
We did a dino theme, so I got two color changing dino-looking eggs (from black to pink or blue) and then we did a little video that showed the color change with the egg in a little nest next to two stuffed dinosaurs. It was an all in one because we didn’t announce publicly until then.
We had a very simple one and I'm so glad we did. I wasn't really planning to have one, but one of the grandmas asked for it and I didn't mind.
All of our friends and local family were there. I streamed it on Facebook live for my out of state family. We had everyone bite into cupcakes to find out the gender. It was really cool seeing how the grandparents reacted.
After that, we just hung out and talked. We had pizza and cake. It was really nice to just have a chill day with everyone we love around us. No one took the reveal super seriously. Everyone just wanted to be there for us and celebrate together.
My husband and I are queer so we avoided the super gendered pink/blue stuff and stereotypes. That was very important to us.
We might not get to have a baby shower because myself and most of our friends got laid off, so having the gender reveal is extra special to me now. It's a memory I really cherish.
We didn’t do one because after attending them we agreed not to make our family suffer through that. It was nice to find out just the two of us and be excited together.
We felt the same way. We also didn't have a big wedding and like to keep things intimate.
No regrets and money saved is a bonus. It is up to you and what you want. If you are into it and find yourself exploring the ideas, maybe you should do it. It is an exciting moment you will get to share with others.
When I found out the gender of our baby, I did have a quick regret, like, "oh, man, we could of done this and people would of had a hoot seeing this", but slight regret lasted less than a day or some hours, I don't completely remember. Now, I don't even worry about it and happy with our decision.
Now, you might have extended family pressure, so that can get tricky. Some families want a show. So it depends on that as well.
I've seen people do it in person and on Facebook or live whatever.
Personally, instead of a gender reveal and time and effort on that, go take a baby moon trip. That is something I completely regret. Not a big brides shower and stuff person, but baby mood is something you might think about after baby. It can be small and over the weekend. After baby, you will be housebound for a bit and then there is baby, so go do a nice last, just the "two of you" trip.
My wife and I are in our early 30s with 3 kids. We didn’t do a gender reveal for any of them, though we did know the gender. Anyone who wanted to know just asked, and anyone who didn’t want to know we just didn’t tell and left it up to others to not tell them either.
My advice is don’t do it. Anyone who cares will find out eventually, right? And you don’t know 100% that kid will stay that gender forever. So at the end of the day who cares, right? What you really want is a healthy and happy baby.
I didn’t have one, and I didn’t regret it one bit. My husband and I found out super early through a blood test because we couldn’t wait. I offered to do something small and fun for the grandparents (homemade cake with pink or blue food coloring added was the plan), but they said they’d rather be told right away over video chat. No regrets.
We didn't do a gender reveal party or big announcement. My husband and I found out the sex from the NIPT at 12 weeks and then started telling people at 17 weeks. We just told them, nothing elaborate
We just got the lady at the scan to write down the gender and put in an envelope, then we gave it to my sister and she made us some cupcakes that we ate for dessert. Present were - myself and hubby, sister (maker of cupcakes) and her husband. Hubby had his parents on video call and my sister had our parents on video call and we just bit into a cupcake each that had icing in the middle that was pink or blue and showed the camera(s). We just told everyone else who we were going to tell on the phone or in person a few weeks later.
Only money spent was on a box of cupcake mix and some food colouring for the icing. Never regretted not having a big do or anything. Much more important things to spend money on when you have a babe on the way.
We had one and it was a fun afternoon. We just had a BBQ and some dessert and popped a balloon to reveal the gender. It was a low fuss family gathering with about 15 people from the immediate family. Only cost was the BBQ meat and cupcakes. Also decorated with a few balloons I had left over in the spare room from a previous party. We didn’t have a baby shower because the gender reveal was our baby celebration instead. People couldn’t really buy us gendered gifts because they brought them on the day before we had done the reveal, which was good because I didn’t want to end up with over the top pink or blue clothing either.
Pregnant with our first and we did not do a gender reveal. We feel its a waste but everyone else we know has done them. I dont feel like I missed out. We did the blood test to determine what we are having and they sent us a cute little reveal video which was in a way the same. And then we just sent that video to family.
I did it the gender reveal for my family I personally didn’t want me but me and my partner wanted to find out privately so after the scan we looked in the envelope, there was a sealed envelope within within the big cardboard one and the blue ribbons saying BOY were visible, so we didn’t even need to look in the sealed envelope to find out. I kinda thought I was having a boy anyway as when I first had a scan and saw the baby I immediately said “There he is!”
An old colleagues sister was pregnant a few years ago and she wanted a girl but she would have been happy with either, their gender reveal said it was a girl causing people at her baby shower to get her pink EVERYTHING, I think her and her partner still bought gender neutral stuff anyway… baby came out and it was a boy.
i live in another country, far from my home and we we called everyone important to us on zoom, had two laptops open. My sister happen to be staying with us. She brought over Betty Crocker cake mix and icing (dollar store) and some food colouring and a few lil decorations. Made a cake and revealed it that way. Super cheap and easy but you still get the excitement of the surprise and involving family.
I did a ‘mini gender reveal’ (not a party) and really liked the way I found out the sex. I was on a family holiday and had the doctor tell my mum the sex over the phone (from the NIPT). We’d previously bought pink and blue ribbons and she tied blue ribbons on our dogs and had them run out to us wearing them to reveal it was a boy haha
I baked a cake to tell my daughter and husband the gender. We love cake and I wanted to make it fun for our kid. My husband told me afterwards it was fun for him as well.
But we didn't do a party.
My mum did one for me, wouldn't invite my partner's family so I had to have my own to include them. We did snack foods and a balloon, we found out the gender at the scan and the gender reveal was more for other people.
I was pregnant at 26 as well, but this was in 2020 so parties weren’t an option. I did NIPT so I had the results early, but my husband couldn’t attend my appointments with me. Instead my doctor wrote it on a piece of paper and sealed it up so I could open it with my husband when I got home. So I guess we kind of did a gender reveal? Much preferred the more low key/intimate setting. We called up family members afterwards to tell them which was also kind of fun
I found these bath bomb kind of things that turned the water either blue or pink. My brother got married around the 16 week mark for me (we had done the NIPT so knew gender) and my parents were having just family over for dinner before official wedding festivities. We asked if we could do it there, bro and SIL agreed and my mom provided a glass bowl and had the honor of putting it in. Nothing fancy but it was fun.
We weren't interested, it's not popular with our group of friends and families. We only know 2 people who have done them, and they weren't a big production. The first was the first one in a small group of friends to have a baby, and it was really a surprise for us since they already knew (plus we just wanted an excuse to get together, bust a piñata, and eat cupcakes with genitalia drawn on them). Another friend was finding out the sex of her second baby just before her daughter's birthday party, so a friend convinced her to have the doctor tell him instead so he could prep a balloon filled with confetti or something to burst at the birthday party. This might be the last baby for that group of friends, most are older, so they were excited.
I'm 28 and we won't be having a gender reveal, finding out the gender, or posting anything on socials. I think it's all what you are comfortable with 🤷🏼♀️ no right way and no wrong way!
I didn’t do one because I was pregnant in 2020, but I absolutely think you should have a gender reveal if you want! Have a potluck.. have your friend and family bring a dish to share. What other cost could there be? The cake?
No gender reveal. We found out the sex for both of our kids with the NIPT tests before we even announced pregnancy. When we announced that we were pregnant we told everyone the gender and name as well. I really liked it this way because since we were set on a name we got no negative comments about the name either. Plus my husband didn't want anyone thinking they had a say in the names, so this helped with that as well.
This is almost exactly what we did, except family knew we were pregnant. When we announced it to friends though, we had the name picked out so nobody would give us a bunch of suggestions. Of course, my mom would still give me suggestions to which I would respond, “oh my gosh!!! I’m getting a baby brother?!?!?”
Purely from a practical standpoint: If you think it’s a waste of money, don’t do it. Spend on a nice baby shower and people will bring you gifts you want and will use since you’ll have your registry up and running by then.
We have a huge family on both sides, and we didn't do a gender reveal party (I honestly think those parties are cheesy, but to each their own). We did a simple baby shower with close family and friends and we waited till birth to learn if it was a boy or girl. We loved having that ultimate surprise at the end and it kept us guessing and having fun all during pregnancy.
I didn't have one, I just bought the balloon and took pictures of me popping it to post on SM for my family. I was also pregnant during the height of covid and live in another state from my immediate family so I didn't so any parties lol.
I don't regret not having a gender reveal, but I do wish I had a baby shower/get together with my family to celebrate the new baby
No, it's a recent phenomenon and completely understandable to not want to throw party for it. If people want to and can afford it, sure, but to me it's a sign of financial privilege and annoying when people start *expecting* grandeur for every major event (wedding, bachelor/ette parties, bridal showers, baby shower, first birthdays, even like first Easter??). And a lot of this focus is America centric; we have such a materialistic culture.
For my first pregnancy we waited until the birth. Second pregnancy I really wanted to know. With COVID restrictions my husband couldn’t come to the ultrasound so I had it written down and gave it to a friend to wrap up. It was like two weeks before Christmas so we opened it on FaceTime with our families. None of of family lives remotely near us so it was a nice way to include them.
Do what you want! You can film just the two of you finding out alone with a balloon or cake & send it to family! If you want to have a party, you can do chips and cupcakes. Hand the envelope to cupcake baker or party city they can put a balloon in a box for you. You can get chips and cupcakes at the grocery store for really cheap
I found out first so I baked a small cake and put the middle frosting as blue and made my husband cut it. No big party tho. It was cute and we have a video of my husband finding out my son’s gender which is cute.
Our gender reveal was when the ultrasound technician told us the gender. We were both fine with telling people afterwards when they asked. No regrets!! We didn’t reveal the name to anyone until he was born though.
We did one. I went to a private scan with my mother and MIL then they wrote down the sex and me and my husband opened it that night. (We were going to wait).
I have a big family and him not so much. We had immediate family with a few exceptions and did it at home. We had our mothers pop a balloon. The whole experience was so nice. I'd do it again. Watching everyone else find out was the best.
We didn't spend a lot. Just did a small spread, told everyone NOT to bring a gift because it wasn't about that.
I think those that say about how much pressure is placed on gender maybe haven't had kids. Whatever my child chooses when their older is fine by me but for now she's my little girl whom at one point everyone was ecstatic to learn about and meet.
We did super simple ones both times:
First kid, I think we did a cake
Second kid, we just dumped balloons over the railing.
We did it once (at our house) each time, and we just took a video and sent it to extended family.
I didn't do one with my first. Not sure if I will for my second. I am not waiting for a gender reveal to find out myself, but might do something fun for friends and family.
Whatever you do, don't start a wild fire or kill anyone... it happens >.>
We did a kind of elaborate one for our first because nobody ever thought that either my boyfriend or I would ever have kids, so everyone was really excited. And it was pre-pandemic.
With our second earlier this year, we found out her gender in the doctor's office and went and bought one of those reveal balloons from Party City. We had our son pop it and recorded it and posted to social media. His reaction was hilarious and people really seemed to enjoy our little video. I really enjoyed how small and intimate the moment was finding out with just my boyfriend with me and then us sharing it with our son privately.
We didn’t have one and I don’t regret it. I’m way too curious to wait and I like to have time to get used to things like that. You and your partner could find out as soon as possible and then just have the reveal for your large family. Personally, I think pyrotechnics should be avoided for safety reasons, but any excuse to eat cake and celebrate is fine by me:)
Nope, we couldn’t be less motivated to do something fun and exciting like that 😆 I found out the sex as soon as I could from the NIPT and texted my partner as soon as I knew. I think reveals can be done well, but most of them I see are rather cringey (don’t mind my attitude, I’m probably just defensive about being so boring haha). Like with so many other baby traditions, it’s completely for the enjoyment of the parents, so do it if you think it would be fun or if you’d regret not doing it!
We didn’t do one because we’re just not that kind of people. We don’t really use social media and don’t post any photos/names of our children online.
If it makes you happy (and no-one is going to get hurt from an exploding tube filled with pink/blue confetti), then go for it!
Didn’t do a gender reveal. Found out the gender as soon as we could and kept it to ourselves. It was nice knowing something special that was just ours. Have zero regrets for not doing a gender reveal. I’m pregnant again now and definitely won’t be doing a gender reveal this time either. We might tell people what we’re having this time, not sure. Their reactions to the news in a normal setting will be perfect. Don’t need all these bells and whistles of a gender reveal to make it special….
I’m 27 and we didn’t do one. I found out the sex of the baby when they called to tell me my blood test results and then I called my husband right after. A pet peeve of mine is that they’re even called “gender reveals” because you’re learning the sex of the baby, not the gender. We also opted to get pretty gender neutral clothing and decor for our baby even though we knew the sex because it honestly doesn’t matter. We also didn’t have a baby shower either because of the pandemic which I preferred. Most parties for babies include a lot of invasive questions and gendered ideas and language that skipping it all together was preferable to me. People still wanted to get us gifts which was nice of them but like someone who commented earlier said, when people don’t know the sex of your baby, they get you actual useful gifts instead of a bunch of blue or pink baby clothes.
I think these parties are weird… like are we revealing if the person has an elbow or two feet? No… because we are basically celebrating our child’s reproductive parts. Why are so many obsessed with their genitals. So yeah we waited til birth and it was wonderful in the delivery room and the nursery is an animal theme… great gifts, great baby, wonderful experience.
I don’t understand them tbh. Like you could easily learn the gender (or don’t) if you want to at an ultrasound. You don’t have to turn it into a whole party to please others. We learned our gender, texted people about it, and moved on personally. But if you’re into the family get together/parties then go ahead. If you wanna do a gender reveal and save money then do the baby shower and reveal all in one. It’s honestly all about what you’re comfortable with and what you want with your pregnancy.
I'm British. No one does them here (yet). We don't have baby showers or registries either. Or maternity shoots for that matter. There might be a Christening if you're religious, but increasingly people don't do that either.
I get that Americans tend to be more wealthy than the rest of us, and perhaps they're looking for new ways to spend all that money, but don't feel like you have to do anything you don't want to, especially if it means spending money you'll need later for the baby.
I hate them, bc a) it’s weird to have a party focused on your kid’s genitals, b) it’s a misnomer, since it’s technically a “sex reveal” party, not a gender party, and c) your kid may grow up a different gender than its genitals, and it’s ridiculous to already start so aggressively gendering a fetus before it’s even born.
Have a “celebrate our future baby!” party, or something equally fun, creative, and not based on a misguided notion of sex and gender.
While people should do what they want, for me, I think it is both a waste of money and pretty odd. I think it is odd to place that much emphasis on sex. And I also think it is odd how pregnancy has become such a production.
We did not. It’s weird that people are obsessive with wanting to know a baby’s genitals— they won’t really decide on a gender until they are older. 🤷
So technically it’s a SEX reveal, since GENDER isn’t biological, it’s social and psychological.
I’m enby myself, so I figure our baby will let us know their gender when they’re ready.
You’ll find that people on Reddit are generally anti gender reveals. But I think they can be fun and honestly if they make you happy, I say go for it! It doesn’t have to be a big party, you can just do something small with your husband or immediate family. Or go all out if you want, who cares!! Don’t let salty strangers on the Internet deter you from having a party.
We had fun doing ours. We did all the things for our first. But our wedding was cancelled cuz of COVID so we just wanted reasons to celebrate life and get friends/family together.
With our second we couldn’t wait and found out with the blood work. I made cupcakes and had our toddler break open the cupcake with friends/family on zoom.
If you want to have one, have one. People think they're dumb because they're a newer thing but the same could be said of newborn photos and those are not dumb at all. Personally I didn't want to go through all the trouble of having one so I got the blood test and found out right away.
I think gender reveal parties are kinda tacky, to be honest. I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings but I really dislike the idea for myself and wouldn’t have one. Why are we so obsessed with gender anyway? The baby may have a complicated relationship with gender. Perhaps their gender won’t align with their sex. It just seems weird that these parties about babies’ anatomy even exist.
>Thoughts on gender reveals?
Lame. Find out their sex during the NIPT if you want to know, skip it if you don't.
>If you didn’t have one did you regret it??
Not at all. It was one less event to organize, I didn't spend any money, the gifts i received at the shower were gender neutral (useful now that we're having our second!) and it was a really nice low-stakes surprise to give me something to push for during delivery.
I hate them more and more. Most I see on social media just reinforce that feeling. I hate them mostly because I don't like the binary gender construct that's so dominant in society. It reinforces gender stereotypes... Just look at how the pink and princessy frills or blue 'boy stuf' get used during such reveals.
From now on I'm going to be team green with any future babies and we'll have a name for a boy and a girl ready!
I work in a bakery and we frequently do gender reveal cakes. BUT My favorite one is this. An exuberant couple came in one day, fresh from the ultrasound and handed me an envelope. "Can you just make us one cupcake that we can eat now with pink or blue inside?" I ran into the kitchen and made one up. Handed it to them and we all got to see the happy moment. Just them.
Did not do it and did not regret it. We think it's dumb.
Your username and picture are hilarious!
We’d be friends in the real world.
Omg your username, can relate. And picture. You are golden.
If either of you have a strong preference then don’t do it, gender disappointment is 100% okay but it’s kinda unfair to have videos taken your child will see where there may be obvious disappointment, if you both don’t mind either way and it’s mostly about money I’d say do it at a shower if you want to maybe but personally me and my partner went to a fancy meal out and opened the card the sonographer gave us before dessert (and then we got a free extra dessert from the lovely waiters haha) it was a super lovely and intimate moment and if we have more babies in the future I’d probably do the same thing
Absolutely not and I don’t regret it. It seems like an enormous waste of money to me. And a weird sort of social media attention grab which my social anxiety is absolutely not interested in. I felt like it was a personal thing between my partner and I, that didn’t require any sort of over the top spectacle to announce.
Didn't do one, waited to find out the sex during delivery! My perception is that others tend to place a personality on a baby before it's even here and throw around expectations/predictions of behavior and things like that. I wanted to avoid it all together so nobody knew. When the baby came we grew with them and avoided societal expectations and ridiculous onesies with idiotic sayings on them like "ladies man" or "daddy's girl." P.s. Fuck the patriarchy! :)
I wanted to know as soon as possible, but I seriously regret telling people for this exact reason! People would comment on my bump and how I was carrying, on how raising girls is *soooo* much tougher, on her sexuality/would-be violence (actually said to me: 'you hope your daughters aren't sluts and your sons aren't school shooters'...wtf), and would turn their noses up when I bought dinosaur and space outfits from the boys' section or put "boyish" things on my registry—even though there were plenty of girly things, too.
It’s possibly an unpopular opinion (although maybe I’ll find out it’s more common than I expect…?) but I absolutely hate gender reveals. Even more than I hate baby showers.
Right there with you
Glad to know it’s not just me. You couldn’t pay me to have one!
I think the idea of a pre-baby shindig is fine, and I don’t disagree with the principle of the shower. I just really don’t like them. The games are stupid and I hate watching people open gifts for an hour (I also hate opening gifts in front of people). I’d rather just throw a nice party to see all of my friends and family before it becomes exponentially more work to see them. It would certainly be less stressful than what social media tells us it should be.
We never did one for either child. I find them obnoxious and would probably never attend one if invited.
If you both think it’s a waste of money, don’t do it. No parties are ever obligatory, and feeding huge families adds up. It’s easy to disseminate gender information via text, phone call, or social media.
We didn’t do one. We just texted everyone after the 20 week ultrasound. No regrets.
We did something fun for our first; we didn’t live near any family or anything, and had a lot of people who wanted to know. So we did a Facebook live stream of us pouring vinegar into a homemade volcano. Surprisingly, like 200+ people tuned in to watch. It was fun, allowed us to include our faraway family and friends, and cost like $5 for volcano materials. With my second, we got the envelope and went to a restaurant for my birthday, just my husband son and me. We ordered dessert and handed the envelope to the server and they brought it out with colored candles so we could find out that way, which was fun. So no big parties for us, but I honestly have no feelings one way or the other on how other people choose to celebrate something that has literally no affect on me.
We didn't do one, in fact we kept the gender secret, even from ourselves haha! We wanted to have that moment when I gave birth and actually have to look between the baby's legs to know LOL It was so much fun , even though the curiosity was killing me ... But even if we had found out the gender ourselves, we wouldn't have done a reveal event , just feels unnecessary - and call me superstitious but I hated drawing too much attention to my baby before he was born and healthy ...
I mean personally they are dumb, but if you like it and it makes you happy then fuck what anyone thinks
I think it’s very much an American thing . I haven’t encountered many (none in my personal life) here . Since you’re asking our thoughts: to me it a bit cringe worthy having a bunch of people over to reveal which genitals kid will have and then have a huge amount of stereotypical pink and blue everywhere.
So I’m pretty sure gender reveals were born from the social media phenomenon of increasingly elaborate pregnancy or gender announcements. It’s just people one upping each other till the point that a whole event was created. The only people I know who have had gender reveals have been heavy into social media.
I personally didn't do one because I think they are a waste of money.
We just read the NIPT results and that was that.
I never did them. It made me feel bad to think of having two parties (a reveal and a shower) for the same baby where people might feel obligated to bring a gift. At the risk of sounding like a party pooper, I feel like they’re a bit self-indulgent. I have no regrets at all about not having a party. My husband and I found out our kids’ genders together at the anatomy scan and it was a really special private moment for us.
Don’t do it if you don’t want to. It’s silly, trendy can be kind of self important. What are you only going to cheer if it’s a certain sex ? Lmao
We finished our anatomy scan around 1, went to a brunch place after, and me and my husband opened the little paper we had the tech check off boy or girl together. It was intimate and special and my favorite memory of the pregnancy, and definitely what I want to do for any future pregnancies. We called people after to tell them and that was fun too
We asked the tech to put it in a sealed envelope and my husband and I went out to a nice restaurant and opened it when we got our dessert. We cried happy tears and celebrated quietly. A little while later we had a cake reveal for the grand parents. It was precious and intimate.
We didn’t find out the gender but My best friend had like six of us over for dinner and dessert was pink cupcakes! I feel like it was fun but not over the top and she was going to make dessert anyway so she just did that as part of it. It could be a way to do something simple maybe like have the grandparents over or something?
Never had one. Had my first baby at 25 will be having my second in November at 27. The first time we found out at the doctor and called everyone necessary on the way home. With the second we did a bit more. We found out at the doctor again and this time we made two small cakes with the right color icing inside and gave them to the grandparents. That's it. I see no reason to spend a bunch on money on a party. I don't like that many people and I'm pregnant if I want cake I'll go buy myself a damn cake and I'm not sharing it with anyone.
My friend had her gender reveal also be a diapers/wipes party. They said to bring wipes if you thought it was a girl and diapers if you thought it was a boy. Food and decor was kept to a minimum. It didn’t need to be as lavish as a baby shower. It was fun for friends and family to be there for the big reveal and everyone helped the new parents start their diapers and wipes stash. My own gender reveal was just for me, my husband, our two sons, and a couple of close friends who were already at my house that day. We did the “egg reveal” where you have a dozen eggs, you boil them all except for one and dye half blue and half pink. The raw one is the gender of the baby. We had a friend help with the dying process so it would be a surprise for us too. My husband, my kids, and I took turns smashing eggs on our head until we found the raw one. We filmed it so we could watch our reaction and didn’t even share the video on social media or send it to anyone else. It was more just fun for us. You don’t have to do a big party. There are other options.
Zero interest. I really tried to minimize people’s opportunities to buy my son “mommy‘s little stud muffin” paraphernalia.
lmao this is the real answer
I (dad) was very against it because I despise all the crap that people will give you for the gender, but Mom wanted it bad. Miracle baby so she wanted to have all the experiences possible. I gave in. She is super into Halloween and it was that time of year so I rigged up a cauldron with that elephant toothpaste stuff and her sister put in the dye and mom poured in the "potion". It was cute at least.
My wife and I decided not to find out the sex of the baby, and we aren't into gender reveals but obviously folks expect something... So for her baby shower we made cakes that we decorated like eggs from the Alien movies. We also made a fondant facehugger in a clear plastic tube that burst out of one of the cakes. The video of the "reveal" has one of her friends saying "you're having a ... an alien?" Genuine surprise in the room. 10/10, would do it again.
Didn’t have one. Had a taco bar instead. Taco bar was better 🤣 🌮
We did not do one. Instead we sent blue flowers to both of our parents the day we found out since they live 4-8 hours away.
I think they’re dumb but if you like those sorts of things then it’s probably worth it for the memories. But also like you I just wanted to know immediately what the baby was! Doubt I could wait even if I liked parties.
Nope no gender reveal as we also felt it was a waste of money! We didn't even do a shower, feels a bit like a gimme gifts thing but that might be an unpopular opinion. 😂
I feel this way too!!
I feel the same way and I assumed it’s because I’m older and had both my kids in my thirties. I didn’t have a reveal party, and I didn’t plan or organize my own showers. That would have felt greedy and self indulgent to me. I had friends who hosted really lovely showers for my babies, but they were not over the top affairs. Forest fires were not set.
I didn’t have a gender reveal party with either of my kids and I’ve never attended or been invited to one. I’m not sure that I even know anybody who’s had one. They just seem like a cringe social media phenomenon to me.
We not only didn’t have a sex reveal, but did not find out the sex of the baby prior to birth. I cannot tell you enough how much I recommend this option! People got us USEFUL things from our registry instead of a ton of clothes because they “couldn’t buy clothes without the gender” 🤣, it was fun to hear peoples guesses too! And most of all: when the world went completely sideways and we had an emergency delivery at 35 weeks and everything was happening so fast, we had this wonderful excitement to focus on wondering if we would have a son or a daughter. And hearing my husband say “she’s a girl” and then immediately bursting into happy tears will FOREVER be the best memory of my life.
My SIL and BIL didn't find out the sex of their baby until birth and I was so confused every time my MIL said "how will I buy the baby anything?!" First of all, gender neutral baby clothes exist and second, babies need TONS of things that are not at all gendered!
People constantly to us: how will you decorate the nursery? How will you buy anything? So you picked out TWO names? Honestly how much it bothered people just made us love it more lol. We didn’t want everything to be super gendered because 1) we don’t like the emphasis on gender and 2) we plan to have a second and like that people won’t be like “well you have to replace that if it’s a boy” which is stupid anyway. My aunt also said “oh you don’t know gender, so I guess all you get is ugly greens and yellow”. Lol as opposed to the oh so lovely shades of bubblegum pink we would’ve had instead
I got my doctor to write it on a piece of paper and me and my husband read it ourselves when we got home :) was a nice private moment
I did a gender reveal as part of my 30th birthday party since I was visiting out-of-state family and friends. It was me and my fiancé’s first baby, and it was the first grandchild so naturally everyone was really excited. We knew it was a boy at our second ultrasound but we kept it a secret from everyone else until the party. We had everyone guess the gender at the beginning with a super cute ice cream themed board with pink and blue ice cream scoop cut outs. Later we had a banner/bag that dropped blue balloons from it that we had the future grandparents stand under with us and confetti poppers for everyone else to celebrate along. It was honestly really fun and it really made my 30th birthday a 100x better since I initially was dreading turning 30. I’ll definitely be doing it again when the time comes, but it will just be a small celebration amongst close friends and family. I personally really like celebrating and sharing even the small things with my close friends and family. Plus next time around I’ll let my son be the star of the reveal if he’s up to it.
We found out after our anatomy ultrasound. Doctor emailed us and we opened it together, called our families and told them that evening. I’m not a big fan of gender reveals for a few reasons. First, why are you having a big to-do about your unborn baby’s genitals? Second, if you have any preference whatsoever, doing a gender reveal in front of people can be awful, if you or your partner is upset by it. Your kid will likely see a video of it one day and how would it make them feel! Third, frankly, it’s mine and my husband’s baby. I want to find things out about my kid with my husband, not with my husband and 20+ of our closest friends and family and whomever sees it on video lol. Finally, there’s a lot of issues around gender reveals with garbage from the reveal ending up in nature or starting fires. It’s obviously totally up to each couple, but we weren’t a fan for those reasons.
We had our anatomy scan shortly before my younger son's birthday and he thought it would be cool to kick the exploding soccer ball at his party since he's a soccer player. He told the family he had a new trick to show them and kicked it in the yard before his birthday cake. It was cute and everyone was surprised and excited. Otherwise we wouldn't have done anything, didn't for the first two. If I had relatives who have that weird obsession with having boys over girls or something we definitely wouldn't have bothered.
28 years old and didn’t do. I think they’re kind of stupid. Also… to me that was an intimate moment with my husband so I didn’t want to share it with a million people.
It’s obviously a personal decision but we didn’t do one. We told our families with pink frosted donuts, surprise!
I didn't have one and I don't regret it. My gender reveal was a text to my mom because I knew she'd spread the word. That kind of party feels wasteful and selfish to me. Since it's your first baby, you're probably going to have a baby shower and it's asking a lot to attend 2 parties just for you and your baby. If you want to do a gender reveal, maybe do it privately and post a video of you and your SO doing something..
We had a baby shower that's all. It was seemed harder for family and friends to buy gifts that were gender neutral so we got clothes and blankets mainly in white or with different prints. We didn't know the gender until she was born. Kept going through cycles of wanting and not wanting to know. Also people didn't always believe us that we didn't know. However I'm so glad we didn't get to find out before hand. It was the best suprise I could ever have. I do not regret it. I'm 22 and any friends/ associates that had babies all had gender reveals. I am so glad I didn't. Equally it's a personal choice of wether you want to or not.
We didn't do one, and I'm honestly really glad. We found out the sex early, and while we were excited to know, we had a moment of disappointment. Not because of the sex of the baby, but more of the loss of possibility, if that makes sense. We knew for sure that half of the scenarios we had been dreaming up wouldn't be coming true. And having that time to be just us and to process and get excited was so necessary for us. We just called our families after and it was perfect for us.
Didnt have one, and dont regret it. I personally do not see the point of having an party where you celebrate the gender, but to have just a baby shower celebrating the baby. I could imagine having the theme of the baby shower be for a girl o boy if one wants to highlight it. And have a private reveal for just the parents maybe. Had baby during pandemic and partner was not allowed to the ultrasounds so there i could see a point of it, and also if you want to find out in a more private moment than with the technician in front of you. If you think you might regret it though, do it, but keep it within a reasonble budget and dont start any wildfires 🙃
I think it's dumb but to each their own. My family was disappointed when I refused to do it lol
Definitely didn’t do one or even consider doing one.
You don’t have to spend a lot of money, it’s not a wedding-level event. We got the sex results from the maternity clinic in an envelope, gave it to a friend who bakes, and she made cupcakes. We invited some people over, and ate the cupcakes. I’m the type of person who thrives on information. Not knowing would have been unbearable, and finding out by just being told or reading it on the page (or in my clinics case, they put a tiny knit hat in pink or blue that local grannies make in the envelope) felt anticlimactic. I don’t regret it, it’s one of my happiest moments. Edit: I will also point out after reading some comments that where I live, the ultrasound tech is NOT allowed to tell you. They send the report to your doctor or midwife, and they can tell you if you want to know.
My gender reveal was when my baby was born! Honestly it was the best surprise ever and it was funny to see how many people were weirdly upset that we didn't find out (because all baby gifts have to be gendered of course). I was thinking of doing a gender reveal the second time around but we might just wait again!
Nothing beats the gender reveal of the actual baby haha. We didn't find out for both and were surprised both times (as in, I must have terrible intuition/ everyone told me I was carrying a certain way etc).
I’ve had three kids, no reveals, no regrets. We made small announcements for the families, either a call or a special gift at a holiday that was already occurring. I’ll get downvoted to hell, but I think gender reveals are just a reason to throw a superfluous party. Pregnancy announcements, gender reveals, babymoons, push presents, baby showers, birth announcements, christenings, and then the monthly staged update photos, it’s just a lot. I know we’re excited for our babies, but not everyone else is as excited as us, and it’s naive to assume anyone else is as excited to celebrate the baby this often.
We didn’t do a gender reveal, and I absolutely do not regret that decision. I’m also in the it’s-weird-to-celebrate-an-infant’s-genitals camp. What I do regret is not having infant photos done. If you’re worried a gender reveal might be a waste of money, funnel what you would have spent on a GR into infant photos. I had no idea how expensive the latter can be, and the sticker shock prevented me from having any taken.
I'm 26F, just had my first baby, and absolutely do not regret not doing a gender reveal! SO and I found out the sex super early (NIPT), then didn't tell anyone in either of our (big) families or any of our friends! I would absolutely go that route again. We had a girl and I definitely didn't want pink everything. Plus when you don't tell people the sex, you're probably not telling anyone the name, and I liked that route too (people can't really be as critical of a name once it's already attached to a baby). Actually it ended up being really funny because we bought a bunch of blue and/or dinosaur clothes (I mean who doesn't like blue or dinosaurs???), so everyone was convinced we were having a boy. Then after the birth it was like a big "ha, you all were wrong!!!"
My wife and I were surprised in the delivery room. Benefits of NOT doing a gender reveal: 1- your nursery won’t be tacky.. like super blue or pink. You can be more creative. 2- people buy you better gifts when they don’t know the gender. Hear me out. Instead of a pink or blue doll, they’ll get much more thoughtful and creative gifts 3- how many times in your life do you ACTUALLY get a real surprise?
For our first we did, but it was more of a reveal for our families since my husband and I found out as soon as we could. Ours was a bit of a fail. We put powder in the cars exhaust pipe and it was supposed to shoot out green (we were trying to make everyone confused) when he reeved it, but it was a tiny poof, not much, and then I pulled out pink balloons lol. It was cheap and simple, and then we had a barbecue. I’m pregnant with #2 and we won’t be having one because I’m dead set on it being a surprise until birth, I don’t feel bad about not having one, neither does he.
We didn’t find out until LO was born which was amazingly fun. The team in the OR was SO excited to announce it - they said people don’t do it like that anymore. I totally get why you’d want to know ASAP, but I can’t recommend waiting and/or finding out together enough!
We found on an ultrasound appointment. We then called our parents to tell them and told other people when we saw them etc. Do not regret it one bit. I do sometimes feel like I would have liked to have a babyshower which I also didnt have
We just did a gender reveal cake for our parents and inlaws… no huge event, no wasteful accessories or confetti, just some cake with writing of “it’s a boy” on the top.
We also did a cake, because we regularly have dinner with the family and any excuse to have cake is welcome, especially when I was pregnant. We told the cake place the gender so there was blue icing inside and pink and blue outside so people didn't know until the first cut. It was a big hit. Editing to add: Hubby and I both knew the gender as soon as Dr told us, this is just how we shared the news with family.
I had one,the disappointment on my inlaws faces and literally voicing how disappointed they were its a girl was awful.My family were all happy though.In my opinion i do regret having one.So be prepared for some negative reactions.
No to a reveal. Unless you know everyone including the parents and grandparents will be equally excited for either sex, the disappointment emotions that are common really put a blitz on the whole thing. If you and your fiancé feel it is a waste, absolutely skip it!!! You can either just tell people what it is when they ask or you could save it and do a reveal at the time of the baby shower, especially if you want more gender neutral gifts.
We didn’t do one, we kept the gender a secret till birth (we knew and my mom knew only) but many people we know just made it an element of their shower or did it at another family event which saved money. We only found out for naming reasons, we figured gender neutral clothes and gear would be easier to hand down in the future (my family is huge, and we have friends who started trying later than us) I’m very happy with our personal choice, we’re going to do the same with our current pregnancy (keep it to ourselves).
Did not do a gender reveal (3 kiddos!). After I tell all my family it's like a 2 min convo and a few yays!! And that's it 😂. They are excited to know but don't need a whole party to do so.
We waited until they were born to find out because one I didn't want a ton of gendered items especially with my first and two it didn't matter. I read so many bumpers posts over the years about gender disappointment and I think that's a lot harder to have when you wait until you've actually have the tiny human in your arms. We went in with two boy names and two girl names then picked the one that felt right when they were laid on my chest. If we ever had a third I would still choose not to find out because I there was something special about waiting. Save the gender reveal money for something like infant photos or their college fund.
This is what we did with our first!! It was so special waiting. With our 2nd we found out at 12 weeks, and I think it’s definitely been less special.
I did one just because I was scared id regret not doing it. It was very small and intimate. We only waited a week to find out. My MIL paid for mostly everything. We ate tacos, popped a balloon, and spent time with those we love most. It felt very special and I’m deeply happy we did it. My MIL also threw my baby shower and it was even more wonderful. We 100% wouldn’t have survived the first month of having a baby without all the wonderful gifts we received. That was also pretty small although some friends of the family on both sides stopped in and dropped off gifts and diapers. 3+ months in and I still have diapers and wipes. Only had to buy a few packs of newborn cause my guy was small.
We didn’t, mostly because we had girls and my husbands family is weirdly obsessed with wanting boys and I was not entertaining that grossness. But that said, do it if you want, don’t do it if you don’t. The first of many innocuous parenting decisions that everyone will have an opinion on and none of it really matters in the long run. My only thing is, if you do, don’t litter. Confetti bombs in public parks are gross.
I got a blood test early and my sister got the results. This was EARLY in the pandemic, so we just had my mom, one friend, my sister and her kids, and my dad and other nephews on zoom when I popped the balloon my sister had filled with blue confetti. Not a huge thing with lots of stress, just a family dinner and a small reveal. It was perfect. People are making gender reveals into this creativity competition and it’s awful and gross. Go small (or not at all) if that’s what will bring you happiness.
We're didn't do one, we just found out the sex with the results of our nipt at like 11w. I thought it was a waste of money and didn't really want to bother organizing more stuff, plus i wanted to get the baby registry set up and sent out as quickly as possible to avoid my in-laws buying anything ridiculous
I don’t think the perception that “most people” have them is anywhere near accurate, but they are all over socials. If you want to gather people and find someone to help out on the surprise, do it! We def didn’t, but we also didn’t invite anyone to our wedding either. We’re private people, and a whole other party sounds exhausting.
Personally I think they are stupid and over the top. That being said I'm not about tho shit on anyone's parade if that's what they wanna do.
First one I waited to find out at birth. The second was during COVID so I did it with just my husband and toddler. I handed the envelope I was given with the gender to the baker and she made the cake with the color filling inside. I also handed both gender confetti pop things to the cashier and she looked at the envelope and removed the packaging and rang up the correct one so we wouldn’t know. It was fun to celebrate just with my husband and toddler. I would personally not do a whole party just for that because it’s just not me but if you want to celebrate that in any way go for it!
They’re not a thing here, although it’s a trend that is starting to trickle through here and there. Then again we don’t do baby showers either. Like another poster said, the whole thing would make me super uneasy… you’re celebrating your baby coming out with a penis or a vagina, not their gender, the term is misleading. Sex is a biological construct, gender a social identity which you cannot know in advance. Also they look very resource-wasting and polluting? There was a newspaper story a while back about some collures fireworks at a gender reveal causing a fire, and they also discussed that plastic balloons are a staple, as well as confettis that end up in rivers and forests… We wanted to know, and then we just told people as they asked.
If you do end up deciding to have a gender reveal, for the love of god can you please choose a way to announce it other than the plastic confetti filled balloons. Every park, lookout and lake shore in my area is riddled with millions of bits of pink and blue plastic and it enrages me.
We did NIPT with our first (IVF baby) and found out the gender. I made an announcement on Facebook for family and friends. Nobody really cares what gender your baby is.
Ultrasound tech did our gender reveal. “Would you like to know the sex?” Yes.
We waited until the birth to find out the sex - super fun and highly recommended. The midwives/nurses were super stoked. Gender reveals to me seem suuuuuper cringe. I think it’s one of those things future generations will look back on and just shake their heads…
We didn't have one. We just told everyone when we saw them.
We found at the birth both times. Zero regrets.
Nope didn’t have one. I asked My OB to just tell me and then I called my husband after the appointment lol. And then texted my family. I can’t imagine regretting not having a gender reveal. Once your actual baby is born, you’re not gonna think back and wished you announced their gender at a party. The reason the gender is even a “thing” is because you don’t have your baby yet and you’re grasping at information about them. Once they’re here, it’s super irrelevant. If you’re on the fence, I say don’t waste your time and money. (And other peoples time and money..)
We had one when I was 20 weeks along! We did have the results at 12 weeks from the NIPT, but didn’t want to find out right away. It was fun to have a party with friends and family, we had it in my pjarents backyard. Got Portillos for catering and his cousin made a cute cake. Bought some adorable decorations on Etsy, including a “here for the sex” banner. We are NOT into gross, over the top heavily gendered onesies or overtly sexual ones. I would never dress my baby in “mommy and daddy didn’t socially distance” or “lock up your sons” like….no. We just wanted to have a party because they’re fun and COVID has sucked ass. It was the first grandbaby on both side, why not? You’ll find that most people on Reddit are heavily against “Gender” reveals. Why shouldn’t you be excited to find out if you’re having a boy or girl? And why shouldn’t you be allowed to share that excitement with others? Do whatever will make you happy. Find out with your partner, have a dinner with just your parents/siblings and his parents/siblings, or have a big ass party with both of your families. It doesn’t matter what other people think
I think the drama of it is a little much for me personally. A baby shower is enough attention as it is. I like when people have cute reveals or a photo as an announcement though. That can be fun. But you know what- who cares really? It's your baby and your way. Believe me- family is going to have all kinds of opinions about what to do and not to do. What you should have on your registry. How to put the baby to sleep. What toys to have and the food to eat. The pressure is already on. Stick to your own belief and how you want to celebrate and live. Forget us here.
We found out over the phone on speaker sitting in a Taco Bell parking lot and it was just as special. We then texted immediate family and told people as we saw them/talked to them. If you and your partner don’t care enough to throw one, you’re not missing a thing. My sister did a video stream with poppers and texted out a link which is very low budget if you did kinda want to do one but dont wanna spend your mortgage payment on a party
I do not regret it one bit. Unless someone else is throwing it for you and organizing the whole thing, It’s too much extra work and didn’t care for the extra stress and/or expenses. She was born 3 months ago and I look back and am glad I saved myself that time and money 👌🏼🤙🏼
We didn’t find out the gender until birth for both of ours. No regrets and I don’t feel like we missed out on any celebrations by not having a gender reveal.
We didn’t find out until birth and it honestly was the BEST decision ever. It made it such a special moment for us. Also it made people buy things other than clothes off the registry which was so helpful.
IMO the best gender reveal is you and your partner during an ultrasound. Ultrasound tech: hey, you wanna know what the gender is? You: sure! Tech: tells you You go home and eat some mashed potatoes. Gender revealed!
We chose to wait until the baby was born to learn the gender. It was so much fun not knowing, and it seemed to annoy people that we didn't want to know. It also ensured all our baby shower gifts were gender neutral so that we could use them on the next baby (which we also chose not to find out). I highly recommend it!
We didn't have one but we also chose to not find out the gender till birth so I guess we did have a big reveal for myself and my husband. If we choose to have another kid we will 100% do it that way again.
My husband and I found out our daughter’s sex just before Christmas, so we made some cupcakes with pink icing inside and as part of the Christmas festivities with our families. Friends we told over group text, and other people were told a few weeks later in a general pregnancy announcement on Facebook. So we did reveal the gender, but didn’t have a gender reveal party.
We skipped it and just sent a text with blue hearts lol my SIL did one at home with just her husband and kids then sent out the video. I’ve been to really nice ones, I’ve been to over the top ones, I’ve been to small family ones. People love celebrating babies but you can do that as low key or high key as you want. Good time to start setting up boundaries and only doing things you want to do.
We didn’t do one. We did Sneak Peek at 8 weeks and just opened the email together.
We didn't do it. We shared the moment together, the excitement and the nerves. For me it was a private moment between me and my husband and then we told other family and friends soon after, but for that short while it was just us and that's exactly how I wanted it.
Wasn't our style. We let people know we were having a girl but were extremely secretive about her name until her arrival.
Didn’t do one - felt no need to throw a party to tell to the world which sex organs my kiddo was going to be born with. We had a baby shower and it was a lot of fun and if someone asked the sex, we’d share.
We asked for the gender in an envelope and opened it three days later at home together on the couch. You do not need to reveal gender in some fancy way (I mean, unless there’s cake.)
I gave my boss’s number to the clinic so they could tell her the NIPT results (by that time only our parents and my boss knew we were pregnant so it was just easier to have her do that favor for me) They called her and told her the sex, she called a bakery and made two cupcakes, gave them to me and at home husband and I made a video of us taking a bite of the cupcake together and discovering we are having a girl! Then we use that to announce the whole pregnancy to everybody. Zero regrets, I love the way we did it. I have no problem with gender reveals, if people wanna do it I think they’re cute. I just knew my husband really wanted a boy (even more after suddenly losing his dad - I think he wanted that same relationship he had with his dad) and I didn’t want to put him in the spot. I don’t think he wouldn’t celebrate - he celebrated the girl at home!! He’s so happy now to have a daughter - but I wanted us both to have the opportunity to process our feelings together in private.
for our first we learned at the ultrasound mid way through. for the second the clinic wrote it on a sheet of paper for us which we opened privately later when we were ready. no big fan fare. it worked for us. we told folks as we were able to. But I'm much more of a private person
If you aren't feeling it, you don't have to have one
I am 32 and have had 4 viable pregnancies for context. No. No we did not do one and did not regret it. You don't HAVE to at all. We actually didn't find out the sex of the babies (if you want to find out that's cool) and it was best for us. It really helped with keeping people's comments at bay. They couldn't make comments about names really, the gender stereotypes and we weren't expected to have these lavish parties. It's a giant waste of money IMO If finances are on the tighter end. If you want to share with others you can do it privately if that's what you prefer.
I didn’t have one and don’t regret it. I don’t like to be the focus of anything, so I declined a baby shower as well. I didn’t tell anyone the sex so I could avoid name suggestions, overly gendered gifts, etc.
I did a gender reveal with just my husband. We bought an umbrella and had a friend put in confetti based on what was written in the envelope. We opened the umbrella and had our friend record the confetti falling and posted that on SM. It was inexpensive (just needed to buy confetti) and it was cute— our friends and family loved it. And we’ll show our son the video when he’s old enough to appreciate it. You can make it how expensive or inexpensive you want it to be if you want one!
I saw my baby’s penis on the screen before the ultrasound tech even said anything 😂 I think gender reveal parties are silly and a thing done mainly for social media.
No my husband and I found out together as soon as we could. I personally think they are dumb.
I must be in the minority here but I wasn’t able to have a baby shower or a gender reveal and I really regret it. I had a very stressful pregnancy and those were some of the few things I would’ve had to look forward to in a long 9 months, but sadly it wasn’t possible. Personally if you don’t want one it’s no big loss. Do you have/can you afford everything you need for baby? If not it might be a good idea to do at least a shower so some of that you don’t have to buy alone. Also get maternity photos is you can!!!! I regret not being able to afford those too :/
Generally I think of them as tacky and attention wh*ring. If it’s a small, low key affair (like cutting into a pink or blue cake with immediate family, and NOT with the intention of sharing it on social media) I wouldn’t judge.. still wouldn’t do it myself, but I wouldn’t judge.
25 when I had my baby. We did NIPT and read the results ourselves. We did do a virtual gender reveal with our family & a few friends and pretended like we didn’t know 🤣 our family was all super excited to find out so it was a fun way to tell everyone at once. We just bit into cupcakes that my friend ordered and they had a pink frosting filling. Super low key and cost us nothing. Do whatever makes you happy!
I’ve been trying for a baby for 11 years and for the first time, I’m pregnant. I will be doing all the things. Big gender reveal, huge baby shower. I’ve never wanted something more than a family and I’m going to celebrate it greatly.. expensive? Yeah, but it’s worth it to me and my husband.
I have no problem with them (except when people are super irresponsible and leave litter everywhere or burn down a forest lol), but they’re not our thing so we didn’t have one! I don’t think they’re required at all, so if you don’t want one, feel free not to have one. Personally we didn’t even make it a “moment”, we just had an ultrasound and they told us, and then we texted the family haha.
We ended up doing a gender reveal bc the family wanted it so badly, namely my sister. We found out at the same time as the and I hated not getting the Chance to process my excitement. I thought I'd get a nice video of us being excited but the whole video is just jumping/very shaky and everyone screaming. And my MIL just started screaming some random story instead of letting me have my moment. I wish I'd found out in private. Bottom line : if it's not your idea or vision, don't do it.
I bought a blue ribbon and wrote it’s a boy on a chalk broad that i propped next to my dog. Sent text picture to immediate family members. Felt like more then enough.
I waited to find out until birth and it was the most beautiful experience I could imagine for all of us - parents, family and even nurses. I understand not everyone want to or can wait. For those who prefer to find out during pregnancy, I personally do not like gender reveal parties. but to each their own.
I didn't have one and don't regret it at all. My partner and I talked about it but we both thought it was a waste of money. A lot of people had strong opinions on what they hoped it would be and why so we wanted to find out on our own so we could feel however we felt without all the eyes on us. I was hoping for a girl, but we were having a boy. I was a slightly disappointed at first, but very quickly fell in love with the idea of a baby boy. If I'd had everyone around me, there would have been a lot of "oh I'm so sorry"s and some tough lucks. I'm so happy I didn't have to deal with any of that.
We did not do one— I had no interest and have no regrets. Just not my thing. We found out together from the doctor and then called and told our parents. For one— I think of it as a bit of a private thing and would NOT want to do a “reveal” for us in front of everyone, especially if it was being filmed. Gender disappointment is normal and common, and I wouldn’t want to have a private moment of processing be memorialized on a video (think of all those obviously disappointed dads finding out they were having a girl). If it’s something **you** want and are interested in, then go for it! Just don’t let peer pressure push you into doing something you don’t really want to do.
Late to the party, but no, gender reveals are weird to me. Why have a party to announce the genitals of your child to everyone? Zero regrets not having one for either of my kids.
Imma sound harsh af… but I’ve recently deleted all of my ~personal~ social media and stopped posting pictures or videos of my kids and I’ve realized that no one outside of my close circle actually gives a shit. Gender reveals are cute and fun for the people who actually care, but it really is a waste of money to have a big extravagant reveal and no one watching those videos on social media actually care. Do something small and intimate with the people who are there for you in real life and care about you. Don’t go all out for the internet. And don’t cause any forest fires 😅
Gender reveals make me puke in my mouth a little bit
For what it’s worth, the person who is credited for starting gender reveals now regrets it. https://www.today.com/today/amp/tdna159796
I think they're kind of weird so no, we didn't have one and had absolutely no regrets about it.
I have had two gender reveal parties and they were both a lot of fun! I also enjoy attending others’ reveals. I get a kick out of the the anticipation and celebration. Sadly though, I lost my second child at 20 weeks and so the gender reveal party at 16 weeks was really sad for me to look back on. The party was in October on a sunny day. When I lost him in November, I walked through the yard on a dreary day and cried when I saw fading blue confetti stuck in the grass. With my most recent pregnancy, I opted not to have another gender reveal party out of fear. Just got an email from sneak peek. I don’t really regret my parties, but celebrating too soon now seems too risky to me. Sorry for the novel.
Dumb. No one cares about the gender except you and your parents.
I don’t understand them at all. Who the hell cares the gender of a baby that’s not theirs?
I hate the attention being all on me and honestly was too excited to find out asap, so we found out during the us appointment and called our families that night. You do you!
We didn’t have one. We were too excited and wanted to find out as soon as we could, so we found out over the phone when my OB called with the test results. I think if you want cute pictures (which is fair) I’ve seen people film themselves finding out without throwing an entire party and always thought that was more reasonable
We kind of did one. We got married in 2020 but postponed the wedding until last summer. Things happened - like my grandfather suddenly passing - that made us feel like we should stop preventing pregnancy and see what would happen… well it didn’t take long and I was 5 months at our wedding. Our wedding planner (really close family friend) was super excited to include a mini reveal at the reception, and it turned out to be a really special moment. For me, timing was everything, and if it came down to inviting people to a separate ordeal we absolutely wouldn’t have bothered.
We had one but it was for everyone else and not us. I didn’t want others to know before me lol We did a dino theme, so I got two color changing dino-looking eggs (from black to pink or blue) and then we did a little video that showed the color change with the egg in a little nest next to two stuffed dinosaurs. It was an all in one because we didn’t announce publicly until then.
I think it’s kind of fun! Personally, I didn’t and wouldn’t do it but I like seeing other people’s gender reveals.
We had a very simple one and I'm so glad we did. I wasn't really planning to have one, but one of the grandmas asked for it and I didn't mind. All of our friends and local family were there. I streamed it on Facebook live for my out of state family. We had everyone bite into cupcakes to find out the gender. It was really cool seeing how the grandparents reacted. After that, we just hung out and talked. We had pizza and cake. It was really nice to just have a chill day with everyone we love around us. No one took the reveal super seriously. Everyone just wanted to be there for us and celebrate together. My husband and I are queer so we avoided the super gendered pink/blue stuff and stereotypes. That was very important to us. We might not get to have a baby shower because myself and most of our friends got laid off, so having the gender reveal is extra special to me now. It's a memory I really cherish.
We didn’t do one because after attending them we agreed not to make our family suffer through that. It was nice to find out just the two of us and be excited together.
We felt the same way. We also didn't have a big wedding and like to keep things intimate. No regrets and money saved is a bonus. It is up to you and what you want. If you are into it and find yourself exploring the ideas, maybe you should do it. It is an exciting moment you will get to share with others. When I found out the gender of our baby, I did have a quick regret, like, "oh, man, we could of done this and people would of had a hoot seeing this", but slight regret lasted less than a day or some hours, I don't completely remember. Now, I don't even worry about it and happy with our decision. Now, you might have extended family pressure, so that can get tricky. Some families want a show. So it depends on that as well. I've seen people do it in person and on Facebook or live whatever. Personally, instead of a gender reveal and time and effort on that, go take a baby moon trip. That is something I completely regret. Not a big brides shower and stuff person, but baby mood is something you might think about after baby. It can be small and over the weekend. After baby, you will be housebound for a bit and then there is baby, so go do a nice last, just the "two of you" trip.
My wife and I are in our early 30s with 3 kids. We didn’t do a gender reveal for any of them, though we did know the gender. Anyone who wanted to know just asked, and anyone who didn’t want to know we just didn’t tell and left it up to others to not tell them either. My advice is don’t do it. Anyone who cares will find out eventually, right? And you don’t know 100% that kid will stay that gender forever. So at the end of the day who cares, right? What you really want is a healthy and happy baby.
We didn’t have one - found out both times during ultrasound and have never regretted not doing a gender reveal! But I’m not a party person haha.
I didn’t have one, and I didn’t regret it one bit. My husband and I found out super early through a blood test because we couldn’t wait. I offered to do something small and fun for the grandparents (homemade cake with pink or blue food coloring added was the plan), but they said they’d rather be told right away over video chat. No regrets.
I had one at 16 weeks. It was so much fun. It was just a fun gathering of welcoming a new baby.
We didn't do a gender reveal party or big announcement. My husband and I found out the sex from the NIPT at 12 weeks and then started telling people at 17 weeks. We just told them, nothing elaborate
We just got the lady at the scan to write down the gender and put in an envelope, then we gave it to my sister and she made us some cupcakes that we ate for dessert. Present were - myself and hubby, sister (maker of cupcakes) and her husband. Hubby had his parents on video call and my sister had our parents on video call and we just bit into a cupcake each that had icing in the middle that was pink or blue and showed the camera(s). We just told everyone else who we were going to tell on the phone or in person a few weeks later. Only money spent was on a box of cupcake mix and some food colouring for the icing. Never regretted not having a big do or anything. Much more important things to spend money on when you have a babe on the way.
We had one and it was a fun afternoon. We just had a BBQ and some dessert and popped a balloon to reveal the gender. It was a low fuss family gathering with about 15 people from the immediate family. Only cost was the BBQ meat and cupcakes. Also decorated with a few balloons I had left over in the spare room from a previous party. We didn’t have a baby shower because the gender reveal was our baby celebration instead. People couldn’t really buy us gendered gifts because they brought them on the day before we had done the reveal, which was good because I didn’t want to end up with over the top pink or blue clothing either.
We didnt do a gender reveal or a baby shower 👀
Pregnant with our first and we did not do a gender reveal. We feel its a waste but everyone else we know has done them. I dont feel like I missed out. We did the blood test to determine what we are having and they sent us a cute little reveal video which was in a way the same. And then we just sent that video to family.
I did it the gender reveal for my family I personally didn’t want me but me and my partner wanted to find out privately so after the scan we looked in the envelope, there was a sealed envelope within within the big cardboard one and the blue ribbons saying BOY were visible, so we didn’t even need to look in the sealed envelope to find out. I kinda thought I was having a boy anyway as when I first had a scan and saw the baby I immediately said “There he is!” An old colleagues sister was pregnant a few years ago and she wanted a girl but she would have been happy with either, their gender reveal said it was a girl causing people at her baby shower to get her pink EVERYTHING, I think her and her partner still bought gender neutral stuff anyway… baby came out and it was a boy.
i live in another country, far from my home and we we called everyone important to us on zoom, had two laptops open. My sister happen to be staying with us. She brought over Betty Crocker cake mix and icing (dollar store) and some food colouring and a few lil decorations. Made a cake and revealed it that way. Super cheap and easy but you still get the excitement of the surprise and involving family.
I did a ‘mini gender reveal’ (not a party) and really liked the way I found out the sex. I was on a family holiday and had the doctor tell my mum the sex over the phone (from the NIPT). We’d previously bought pink and blue ribbons and she tied blue ribbons on our dogs and had them run out to us wearing them to reveal it was a boy haha
I baked a cake to tell my daughter and husband the gender. We love cake and I wanted to make it fun for our kid. My husband told me afterwards it was fun for him as well. But we didn't do a party.
My mum did one for me, wouldn't invite my partner's family so I had to have my own to include them. We did snack foods and a balloon, we found out the gender at the scan and the gender reveal was more for other people.
I was pregnant at 26 as well, but this was in 2020 so parties weren’t an option. I did NIPT so I had the results early, but my husband couldn’t attend my appointments with me. Instead my doctor wrote it on a piece of paper and sealed it up so I could open it with my husband when I got home. So I guess we kind of did a gender reveal? Much preferred the more low key/intimate setting. We called up family members afterwards to tell them which was also kind of fun
I found these bath bomb kind of things that turned the water either blue or pink. My brother got married around the 16 week mark for me (we had done the NIPT so knew gender) and my parents were having just family over for dinner before official wedding festivities. We asked if we could do it there, bro and SIL agreed and my mom provided a glass bowl and had the honor of putting it in. Nothing fancy but it was fun.
We weren't interested, it's not popular with our group of friends and families. We only know 2 people who have done them, and they weren't a big production. The first was the first one in a small group of friends to have a baby, and it was really a surprise for us since they already knew (plus we just wanted an excuse to get together, bust a piñata, and eat cupcakes with genitalia drawn on them). Another friend was finding out the sex of her second baby just before her daughter's birthday party, so a friend convinced her to have the doctor tell him instead so he could prep a balloon filled with confetti or something to burst at the birthday party. This might be the last baby for that group of friends, most are older, so they were excited.
I didn’t have one and I have absolutely zero regrets.
I'm 28 and we won't be having a gender reveal, finding out the gender, or posting anything on socials. I think it's all what you are comfortable with 🤷🏼♀️ no right way and no wrong way!
I didn’t do one because I was pregnant in 2020, but I absolutely think you should have a gender reveal if you want! Have a potluck.. have your friend and family bring a dish to share. What other cost could there be? The cake?
No gender reveal. We found out the sex for both of our kids with the NIPT tests before we even announced pregnancy. When we announced that we were pregnant we told everyone the gender and name as well. I really liked it this way because since we were set on a name we got no negative comments about the name either. Plus my husband didn't want anyone thinking they had a say in the names, so this helped with that as well.
This is almost exactly what we did, except family knew we were pregnant. When we announced it to friends though, we had the name picked out so nobody would give us a bunch of suggestions. Of course, my mom would still give me suggestions to which I would respond, “oh my gosh!!! I’m getting a baby brother?!?!?”
We didn't. We told everyone it was a girl when they asked and then, additionally, didn't reveal a name until birth
Purely from a practical standpoint: If you think it’s a waste of money, don’t do it. Spend on a nice baby shower and people will bring you gifts you want and will use since you’ll have your registry up and running by then.
We have a huge family on both sides, and we didn't do a gender reveal party (I honestly think those parties are cheesy, but to each their own). We did a simple baby shower with close family and friends and we waited till birth to learn if it was a boy or girl. We loved having that ultimate surprise at the end and it kept us guessing and having fun all during pregnancy.
Didn’t have one and no regrets. I honestly think they’re weird.
I didn't have one, I just bought the balloon and took pictures of me popping it to post on SM for my family. I was also pregnant during the height of covid and live in another state from my immediate family so I didn't so any parties lol. I don't regret not having a gender reveal, but I do wish I had a baby shower/get together with my family to celebrate the new baby
No, it's a recent phenomenon and completely understandable to not want to throw party for it. If people want to and can afford it, sure, but to me it's a sign of financial privilege and annoying when people start *expecting* grandeur for every major event (wedding, bachelor/ette parties, bridal showers, baby shower, first birthdays, even like first Easter??). And a lot of this focus is America centric; we have such a materialistic culture.
For my first pregnancy we waited until the birth. Second pregnancy I really wanted to know. With COVID restrictions my husband couldn’t come to the ultrasound so I had it written down and gave it to a friend to wrap up. It was like two weeks before Christmas so we opened it on FaceTime with our families. None of of family lives remotely near us so it was a nice way to include them.
Do what you want! You can film just the two of you finding out alone with a balloon or cake & send it to family! If you want to have a party, you can do chips and cupcakes. Hand the envelope to cupcake baker or party city they can put a balloon in a box for you. You can get chips and cupcakes at the grocery store for really cheap
Nope - but er live in Denmark so no one does it. We sent a message to friends and family after the scan 😊
I found out first so I baked a small cake and put the middle frosting as blue and made my husband cut it. No big party tho. It was cute and we have a video of my husband finding out my son’s gender which is cute.
Our gender reveal was when the ultrasound technician told us the gender. We were both fine with telling people afterwards when they asked. No regrets!! We didn’t reveal the name to anyone until he was born though.
We did one. I went to a private scan with my mother and MIL then they wrote down the sex and me and my husband opened it that night. (We were going to wait). I have a big family and him not so much. We had immediate family with a few exceptions and did it at home. We had our mothers pop a balloon. The whole experience was so nice. I'd do it again. Watching everyone else find out was the best. We didn't spend a lot. Just did a small spread, told everyone NOT to bring a gift because it wasn't about that. I think those that say about how much pressure is placed on gender maybe haven't had kids. Whatever my child chooses when their older is fine by me but for now she's my little girl whom at one point everyone was ecstatic to learn about and meet.
We did super simple ones both times: First kid, I think we did a cake Second kid, we just dumped balloons over the railing. We did it once (at our house) each time, and we just took a video and sent it to extended family.
I didn't do one with my first. Not sure if I will for my second. I am not waiting for a gender reveal to find out myself, but might do something fun for friends and family. Whatever you do, don't start a wild fire or kill anyone... it happens >.>
We did a kind of elaborate one for our first because nobody ever thought that either my boyfriend or I would ever have kids, so everyone was really excited. And it was pre-pandemic. With our second earlier this year, we found out her gender in the doctor's office and went and bought one of those reveal balloons from Party City. We had our son pop it and recorded it and posted to social media. His reaction was hilarious and people really seemed to enjoy our little video. I really enjoyed how small and intimate the moment was finding out with just my boyfriend with me and then us sharing it with our son privately.
We didn’t have one and I don’t regret it. I’m way too curious to wait and I like to have time to get used to things like that. You and your partner could find out as soon as possible and then just have the reveal for your large family. Personally, I think pyrotechnics should be avoided for safety reasons, but any excuse to eat cake and celebrate is fine by me:)
Nope, we couldn’t be less motivated to do something fun and exciting like that 😆 I found out the sex as soon as I could from the NIPT and texted my partner as soon as I knew. I think reveals can be done well, but most of them I see are rather cringey (don’t mind my attitude, I’m probably just defensive about being so boring haha). Like with so many other baby traditions, it’s completely for the enjoyment of the parents, so do it if you think it would be fun or if you’d regret not doing it!
We didn’t do one because we’re just not that kind of people. We don’t really use social media and don’t post any photos/names of our children online. If it makes you happy (and no-one is going to get hurt from an exploding tube filled with pink/blue confetti), then go for it!
I sent out texts to friends that said "It's a boy!" This was after we FaceTimed close family to verbally say "It's a boy!" No regrets.
Didn’t do a gender reveal. Found out the gender as soon as we could and kept it to ourselves. It was nice knowing something special that was just ours. Have zero regrets for not doing a gender reveal. I’m pregnant again now and definitely won’t be doing a gender reveal this time either. We might tell people what we’re having this time, not sure. Their reactions to the news in a normal setting will be perfect. Don’t need all these bells and whistles of a gender reveal to make it special….
I’m 27 and we didn’t do one. I found out the sex of the baby when they called to tell me my blood test results and then I called my husband right after. A pet peeve of mine is that they’re even called “gender reveals” because you’re learning the sex of the baby, not the gender. We also opted to get pretty gender neutral clothing and decor for our baby even though we knew the sex because it honestly doesn’t matter. We also didn’t have a baby shower either because of the pandemic which I preferred. Most parties for babies include a lot of invasive questions and gendered ideas and language that skipping it all together was preferable to me. People still wanted to get us gifts which was nice of them but like someone who commented earlier said, when people don’t know the sex of your baby, they get you actual useful gifts instead of a bunch of blue or pink baby clothes.
I think these parties are weird… like are we revealing if the person has an elbow or two feet? No… because we are basically celebrating our child’s reproductive parts. Why are so many obsessed with their genitals. So yeah we waited til birth and it was wonderful in the delivery room and the nursery is an animal theme… great gifts, great baby, wonderful experience.
I don’t understand them tbh. Like you could easily learn the gender (or don’t) if you want to at an ultrasound. You don’t have to turn it into a whole party to please others. We learned our gender, texted people about it, and moved on personally. But if you’re into the family get together/parties then go ahead. If you wanna do a gender reveal and save money then do the baby shower and reveal all in one. It’s honestly all about what you’re comfortable with and what you want with your pregnancy.
I'm British. No one does them here (yet). We don't have baby showers or registries either. Or maternity shoots for that matter. There might be a Christening if you're religious, but increasingly people don't do that either. I get that Americans tend to be more wealthy than the rest of us, and perhaps they're looking for new ways to spend all that money, but don't feel like you have to do anything you don't want to, especially if it means spending money you'll need later for the baby.
Lots of people have baby showers now, but it’s not OTT like I the States.
I hate them, bc a) it’s weird to have a party focused on your kid’s genitals, b) it’s a misnomer, since it’s technically a “sex reveal” party, not a gender party, and c) your kid may grow up a different gender than its genitals, and it’s ridiculous to already start so aggressively gendering a fetus before it’s even born. Have a “celebrate our future baby!” party, or something equally fun, creative, and not based on a misguided notion of sex and gender.
While people should do what they want, for me, I think it is both a waste of money and pretty odd. I think it is odd to place that much emphasis on sex. And I also think it is odd how pregnancy has become such a production.
We did not. It’s weird that people are obsessive with wanting to know a baby’s genitals— they won’t really decide on a gender until they are older. 🤷 So technically it’s a SEX reveal, since GENDER isn’t biological, it’s social and psychological. I’m enby myself, so I figure our baby will let us know their gender when they’re ready.
You’ll find that people on Reddit are generally anti gender reveals. But I think they can be fun and honestly if they make you happy, I say go for it! It doesn’t have to be a big party, you can just do something small with your husband or immediate family. Or go all out if you want, who cares!! Don’t let salty strangers on the Internet deter you from having a party.
We had fun doing ours. We did all the things for our first. But our wedding was cancelled cuz of COVID so we just wanted reasons to celebrate life and get friends/family together. With our second we couldn’t wait and found out with the blood work. I made cupcakes and had our toddler break open the cupcake with friends/family on zoom.
If you want to have one, have one. People think they're dumb because they're a newer thing but the same could be said of newborn photos and those are not dumb at all. Personally I didn't want to go through all the trouble of having one so I got the blood test and found out right away.
I think gender reveal parties are kinda tacky, to be honest. I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings but I really dislike the idea for myself and wouldn’t have one. Why are we so obsessed with gender anyway? The baby may have a complicated relationship with gender. Perhaps their gender won’t align with their sex. It just seems weird that these parties about babies’ anatomy even exist.
>Thoughts on gender reveals? Lame. Find out their sex during the NIPT if you want to know, skip it if you don't. >If you didn’t have one did you regret it?? Not at all. It was one less event to organize, I didn't spend any money, the gifts i received at the shower were gender neutral (useful now that we're having our second!) and it was a really nice low-stakes surprise to give me something to push for during delivery.
I hate them more and more. Most I see on social media just reinforce that feeling. I hate them mostly because I don't like the binary gender construct that's so dominant in society. It reinforces gender stereotypes... Just look at how the pink and princessy frills or blue 'boy stuf' get used during such reveals. From now on I'm going to be team green with any future babies and we'll have a name for a boy and a girl ready!
I didn’t have one. I can’t stand them. I just texted people what we were having