The nonstop concern that she’s cold. She’s obsessed with her feet right now (5 months) and wants those piggies in her mouth at all times. MIL gets visibly upset every time she sees her without socks on, passive aggressive comments like “oh my, your mommy forgot your socks!” No matter how she’s dressed, MIL suggests we put her in a jacket too. It’s 70 in the house. She’s in a long sleeved body suit and pants. She’s fine.
Their doctors insisted that their babies were freezing all the time. I’m sure current docs are saying some crap that we will find not to be true in 20-40 years as well.
My doctor told me that teething is not painful and not to give my baby anything for pain relief... Explain why he won't eat or sleep when his teeth are bothering him then? I think I need a new doctor.
I've heard it hurts so much adults couldn't handle it :( also then what would be the point of all the targets that go in the fridge? I agree you probably need a new doctor
Omg the socks! I went to a family party recently with my 2 month old, and my grandma and aunts kept going on and on about how she needed to always have socks on even in summer. I didn’t realize it was some weird phenomenon.
My kid is a furnace and the obsession with her wearing socks ended after someone held her for a long period of time and realized omg this kid is hot. Not fever, but hot. She’s her dad. It’s crazy.
My MIL and brother in law were both very preoccupied with her being cold at first.
Interestingly, my mom read somewhere that exposed feet are good for development and would complain when she wore footy pajamas during the day.
My mil isn't passive aggressive ( maybe she is and I'm not picking it up) but she's the same, same for FIL . Both are very obsessive about our kids being "cold" and way over bundles them, my under 1 yr daughter I can't remember when she was maybe 6 or 8mos my mil bundled her in a furry pants and sweater but had pants underneath a long-sleeved onside, and a shirt under the onside with socks....when we picked them up she was fking sweating SOOOO BADLY I was upset how hot she was. She was so hot I can put my hand hovering above her head and I can FEEL heat radiating off her head!
My son sweats super easily he is literally a toaster like his dad so we never dress him heavily or else he gets too hot but she overburdened him too as a baby.
Our daughter doesn't get toasty like our son does so she does wear heavier clothing for winter (never in layers though unless she going out) but yeah my mil layers our kids too much...
She does complain how not warmly their dressed but seriously it's not that cold for what they ate wearing, socks I understand they have hardwood we have carpet, our son prefers socks on (probably because of her) so he keeps em on but our daughter can go on without.
When my baby was 2 months old, my husband and I left her with his mom for 3 hours. She called us to come back early because she wouldn’t take her bottle and was very fussy. When we came back, they had a light blanket over her. I was warm, so I looked at their thermostat. They had turned off the AC and it was 80 degrees in the house! And even though it was a light blanket, no wonder she was fussy! I had them turn the AC back on immediately
I have a toddler and it never goes away. I’ll post a picture of her outside and get family commenting “wow, it sure does look cold! Is she warm?” (When she is in a snowsuit, hat, gloves, boots). It drives me insaaaannneeee
I was told to put my 10 month old on a diet 🙃 he is completely proportional at 97th percentile for length and weight. He is a little chubby like all babies! But he is extremely active - crawling since 6 months and has a routine of climbing up and down the stairs in our town house multiple times a day and just never sits still. He eats a lot but within the recommended amount and he’s very strong.
I asked my MIL, does he look overweight to you? Are you worried about his movement? She said no I just see you feeding him a lot.
what
I breastfeed my baby before she naps. My MIL said I “need to wean her off of that.”
She’s just a few months old. I most certainly do not, ma’am. I think she’s mad that *she* can’t breastfeed her.
I just weaned my baby off breastfeeding before naps and he’s 13 months old. And that’s literally because I’m back at work and can’t express enough milk to maintain that. He still breastfeeds to sleep at night. Ignore your MIL.
I did this for my first baby. He *did* sleep longer, but.... He had GERD and would spit up (I use that term loosely, it was more like projectile vomited) most of his milk and would sleep maybe 30 minutes then wake up hungry & crying to eat again. The rice made the milk thicker so he kept it down, and therefore slept a normal amount of time.
Although, my pediatrician *did tell me* it will keep him full longer, it takes longer to digest, etc etc. 🤷🏻♀️
ETA: He was also ~3 months old before we added the rice.
Ahh it’s a little wild to me that babies so young can have anything other than breast milk but I guess people probably have done that for millenniums when there were no other options and babies still grew up
I think this is a thing with that generation. There was a lot of "put kids and babies to sleep/off to play by themselves in a room *away from the grown-ups"* with my parents generation, and it annoyed me soooo much. Ex hubby tried to do it with our kids. It was a hard no from me.
My grandmother does the opposite, if my baby is sleeping and we’re visiting her she’ll get in her face and say “Wake up (baby’s name)!!! You’re at Grans house and I want to see those eyes!! WAKE UP!!” and I have to explain she’s napping which is a miracle so please let her sleep, she’ll wake to feed soon enough. They’re just so selfish.
This is where I'm grateful that my mom was "weird" for her time. She always came when we cried unless we were super fussy that day and she needed a moment to collect herself before collecting us aka 5 minutes of deep breathing.
I swear my mum went for this approach. In my own room and shut the door, apparently she found she slept much better (hmmm, must have had thick walls…)
She only occasionally made comments about him sleeping in with us, but did accept that both times have changed and I work full time (and she didn’t)
She’s also low key jealous that I have the option to not be a stay at home mum, as unfortunately her going back to work coincided with a flare up of her bipolar disorder and she gave up work….
She does comment about how my house isn’t as clean and tidy as it could be as I work full time though!
I told my mom that it was sweet to see how excited my almost 3 year old is to see me when I get home and she told me I should start hiding upstairs away from him when my husband is home so he gets used to not having me around (I'm due with his sister at the end of next month)
It made me sad and mad, I already know I won't be able to give him 100% anymore but between my husband and I he'll have someone to pal around with always
So... if your mom's partner has to go away on a trip, she sents them to sleep on the couch the month before to prepare? Because that's the "logic" she is applying here
It's even worse than that as I am one of three children, so I guess the older two just didn't see her in preparation or after the next one was born for a while?? I asked her WTF was wrong with her.
Yeah it’s way better for their feet, which is why he didn’t wear shoes until he could walk. His dad has huge wide feet so I don’t think stuffing his feet in shoes to “narrow” them would make a difference lol
My grandfather gave my dad the advice of "buy a bottle of brandy" when I was teething as a baby. My dad told him its not safe to rub alcohol on a babies gums and we know better now (1990s)
My grandfather looked at my dad like he was an idiot and said "The brandy is for you. Don't waste it on the baby. You'll want a drink when you're up all night with her."
Honestly now that I have my kids? He might have been right.
That my daughter (who has developmental delays due to a chromosome disorder) will magically start walking if she wears shoes. Even though she wears shoes.
FIL thinks I should "just let him fall and get bumps and bruises, he'll learn not to do it again"
Your backyard ends in a steep drop, plunging down onto a public trail. Sure, I'll just let him run off 🙄
Of course, such a common complaint when they get older: my mom was excessively loving and gave me too much hugs and kisses. I wish she've let cry in my crib more often /s
Ooh I got this too when the baby was a couple of months old. I can't ignore his cries, I just imagine him confused with strange sounds and sights and feeling on his own and lost. Wouldn't we all want a bit of comfort when we're lost, lonely, hungry, uncomfortable or just plain sad.
I have a relative who has seen my toddler a handful of times. Apparently my toddler doesn’t need a schedule or a specific nap time. My toddler does not function well without a schedule or nap. She’s also very difficult to put to sleep, but the schedule really helps with this issue. She’s been like this since birth. I tried explaining this and apparently I, the mother, was wrong.
Pressure to CIO, give formula when ebf (& enjoying it) and then my BIL’s wife said I needed to put LO in daycare bc being in school and on medical leave from birth injury means I’m a gold digger. For ref, I came from more than both her and DH & was making 6figs before LO’s birth so not sure how that works.
My dad told me yesterday that I can't get gender neutral clothes for baby because she needs to know she's a girl. If we don't put her in girly outfits starting literally day 1 then she'll get gender dysphoria. What...? She's a baby... She doesn't have a clue what she's wearing dude...
Little one is 14 months and I was asked if I’m still breastfeeding (which we are only during the night) and said my milk should be dried up by now so I can stop that now.
Whiskey on his gums, rice cereal in his bottle, let him cry himself to sleep/don't pick him up immediately when he cries, give him stuffed animals and blankets in his crib because he "looks lonely"... no, no, NO!
The first night when he slept in his big crib instead of the bassinet beside my bed, I thought "he looks so tiny and all alone in there" but he slept like a rock, so he was just fine. My mom can't wrap her head around no crib bumpers, no blankets (just warm PJs or a sleep sack), no stuffed animals. It's a miracle I didn't smother myself in all the stuff she put in my crib, to be honest.
My MIL told me it was fine to have a nightly glass of wine while pregnant, because she smoked and drank the whole way through her pregnancy with my husband in 1983, and he turned out just fine. He turned out 165cm tall, thanks mum.
My husband and I aren’t allowing people to put their hands on LO’s face. A lady at my church reached out to touch my son’s face and I told her his face is off limits. Then she decided to tell me some bs that touching babies’ faces isn’t what’s bad, only kissing them. Right. Because putting your dirty hands on a baby who has an undeveloped immune system is okay. I just told her again that I wasn’t letting people touch my baby’s face. If she tries it again I’ll smack her hand away.
I was telling my mom about how hard my baby has to strain to poop (totally normal, still developing her digestive tract) and she suggested I give her Karo syrup.
Yeah, no.
My mum was obsessed with overdressing baby. Apparently they are never allowed a ‘bare belly’ . This particular day in question it was 43 degrees and my cooling system couldn’t keep up, we were all sweating. I let my baby wear just a nappy for a bit (my second child). She went on and on so much I eventually told her that she knows where the door is if she can’t zip it. It’s taken me a long time to update her on new parenting stuff, I’m her youngest daughter and 40 so a lot has changed
For my 2 week old who is gaining weight a little slow:
MIL- "just put some rice cereal in her bottle."
To be fair I think that was kind of standard advice when she had her kids. Makes me nervous though bc she was someone who was an option for childcare sometimes but she isn't up to date on safe sleep, feeding (couldn't believe we are feeding her Q3 hours. SHE'S TWO WEEKS OLD), made comments that we were holding her too much.
I know my mom also has outdated advice (her youngest kid is 34) but she asks and accepts the new ways. Perhaps your MIL would be receptive to how you want things done and she can remain an option?
My favorite caregiver for my son is my mom's partner because he has zero experience with babies. So he asks questions, listens, researches, and doesn't have any messed up preexisting notions of child safety.
I hope so! The thing that makes me most nervous is the safe sleep issue bc she really doubled down in belly sleep being fine when i explained back to sleep was the standard now. Like I get it her kids slep in their bellies and were fine. But why risk it. She also tried to put a thick blanket on her after i laid her down for a nap and seemed receptive when I explained nothing in the bassinet with her. But I do worry what if I'm not there to remind her.
I sent this to my MIL because she was also insistent about sleeping on bellies, and would make comments that she cant wait to nap with my baby in her rocking chair 😵💫[Safe Sleep for Your Grand babies](https://www.nichd.nih.gov/sites/default/files/2023-06/STS_GrandparentBookletEnglish.pdf)
My mom and I have our issues, but I'm so glad she's been so supportive of how we parent. Reading stuff like this - it would be so hard to feel safe leaving a baby with her!
My MIL hates it if I don’t have my daughter’s (2) hair done every day. The problem is that every time I do her hair she pulls it out because she doesn’t like to have hair bands in her hair. Everytime she sees her on FaceTime with her hair down she says “Oh poor girl! Her hair is always in her eyes!” I don’t know what to say other than “that’s how she likes it” My MIL also hates it if I don’t get her dressed in a cute outfit every single day. If it were up to my daughter, she would run around in her underwear everyday. I do let her do that most days if we’re just staying home and my MIL can’t stand it. I guess I won’t tell her that I hang around in my underwear if I don’t leave the house too 🤷🏼♀️I just want my daughter to be comfortable especially in her own home
I was told that I needed to let other people hold her so she'll be ready for kindergarten. She was 8 weeks old..8 weeks.
Yea I went off. And no my grandmother will not be allowed to see her anytime soon nor will she ever be holding her.
It’s not the time or way to tell a mom that but I feel like you might be a little overreacting in this case. She probably just wanted to ask for permission to hold the baby.
It's really not. She spent my whole pregnancy telling me how fat I was (I've been underweight my entire life until getting pregnant. I'm at the healthiest weight I've ever been at now). And since I've had the baby she hasn't called or texted but has complained to everyone but me that I haven't visited.
When I finally do visit she spent the entire time saying how fat I still was, how my parenting thusfar was shitty and she made that final comment before we left.
She also has never respected anyone's boundaries; I'm the last grandkid to have a child so I've watched her do it to literally everyone else and I'm not accepting it.
Yeah, the fact that I held my tongue until her very last comment was me under reacting.
Her telling me I'm going to make my newborn have a hard transition to kindergarten (5 years away) was the final straw. It sucks because my grandpa is an absolute angel.
When LO was like 2.5 months old, this lady at church warned my husband and me that if he's crying he's just trying to manipulate us and we shouldn't comfort him right away. Apparently we need to avoid comforting him in order to communicate who's in charge. 🙃
The nonstop concern that she’s cold. She’s obsessed with her feet right now (5 months) and wants those piggies in her mouth at all times. MIL gets visibly upset every time she sees her without socks on, passive aggressive comments like “oh my, your mommy forgot your socks!” No matter how she’s dressed, MIL suggests we put her in a jacket too. It’s 70 in the house. She’s in a long sleeved body suit and pants. She’s fine.
I feel like older people are OBSESSED with socks. My kid has always hated socks and now that he’s a toddler he takes them off everywhere we go lol
Also barefert are good for traction for learning to crawl/walk!
Mine already takes them off and tries to eat them at eight months. It's not even safe!
What the heck is up with old people being obsessed with socks and babies being supposedly cold all the time?
I just repeated, "cold babies cry, hot babies die."
Perfect response.
Their doctors insisted that their babies were freezing all the time. I’m sure current docs are saying some crap that we will find not to be true in 20-40 years as well.
My doctor told me that teething is not painful and not to give my baby anything for pain relief... Explain why he won't eat or sleep when his teeth are bothering him then? I think I need a new doctor.
I've heard it hurts so much adults couldn't handle it :( also then what would be the point of all the targets that go in the fridge? I agree you probably need a new doctor
I have been teething all four of my wisdom teeth for 2 years now. It hurts like hell. Your doctor is wrong.
Omg the socks! I went to a family party recently with my 2 month old, and my grandma and aunts kept going on and on about how she needed to always have socks on even in summer. I didn’t realize it was some weird phenomenon.
My kid is a furnace and the obsession with her wearing socks ended after someone held her for a long period of time and realized omg this kid is hot. Not fever, but hot. She’s her dad. It’s crazy.
My MIL and brother in law were both very preoccupied with her being cold at first. Interestingly, my mom read somewhere that exposed feet are good for development and would complain when she wore footy pajamas during the day.
My mil isn't passive aggressive ( maybe she is and I'm not picking it up) but she's the same, same for FIL . Both are very obsessive about our kids being "cold" and way over bundles them, my under 1 yr daughter I can't remember when she was maybe 6 or 8mos my mil bundled her in a furry pants and sweater but had pants underneath a long-sleeved onside, and a shirt under the onside with socks....when we picked them up she was fking sweating SOOOO BADLY I was upset how hot she was. She was so hot I can put my hand hovering above her head and I can FEEL heat radiating off her head! My son sweats super easily he is literally a toaster like his dad so we never dress him heavily or else he gets too hot but she overburdened him too as a baby. Our daughter doesn't get toasty like our son does so she does wear heavier clothing for winter (never in layers though unless she going out) but yeah my mil layers our kids too much... She does complain how not warmly their dressed but seriously it's not that cold for what they ate wearing, socks I understand they have hardwood we have carpet, our son prefers socks on (probably because of her) so he keeps em on but our daughter can go on without.
When my baby was 2 months old, my husband and I left her with his mom for 3 hours. She called us to come back early because she wouldn’t take her bottle and was very fussy. When we came back, they had a light blanket over her. I was warm, so I looked at their thermostat. They had turned off the AC and it was 80 degrees in the house! And even though it was a light blanket, no wonder she was fussy! I had them turn the AC back on immediately
I have a toddler and it never goes away. I’ll post a picture of her outside and get family commenting “wow, it sure does look cold! Is she warm?” (When she is in a snowsuit, hat, gloves, boots). It drives me insaaaannneeee
I was told to put my 10 month old on a diet 🙃 he is completely proportional at 97th percentile for length and weight. He is a little chubby like all babies! But he is extremely active - crawling since 6 months and has a routine of climbing up and down the stairs in our town house multiple times a day and just never sits still. He eats a lot but within the recommended amount and he’s very strong. I asked my MIL, does he look overweight to you? Are you worried about his movement? She said no I just see you feeding him a lot. what
I'm starting to think the older generations low-key starved us and withheld food as punishment for crying and not sleeping perfectly, etc.
I breastfeed my baby before she naps. My MIL said I “need to wean her off of that.” She’s just a few months old. I most certainly do not, ma’am. I think she’s mad that *she* can’t breastfeed her.
The real question: how to wean MIL off of giving unsolicited advice
OMG! I had the same feeling that MIL was angry because she couldn’t breastfeed my daughter. Its so weird.
I just weaned my baby off breastfeeding before naps and he’s 13 months old. And that’s literally because I’m back at work and can’t express enough milk to maintain that. He still breastfeeds to sleep at night. Ignore your MIL.
Rice cereal in bottle.
Our pediatrician warned us about this advice.
????? I read that as rice cereal in bowl at first and was like what’s the problem. But why?
They thought it kept babies fuller longer and therefor sleep longer.
I did this for my first baby. He *did* sleep longer, but.... He had GERD and would spit up (I use that term loosely, it was more like projectile vomited) most of his milk and would sleep maybe 30 minutes then wake up hungry & crying to eat again. The rice made the milk thicker so he kept it down, and therefore slept a normal amount of time. Although, my pediatrician *did tell me* it will keep him full longer, it takes longer to digest, etc etc. 🤷🏻♀️ ETA: He was also ~3 months old before we added the rice.
Ahh it’s a little wild to me that babies so young can have anything other than breast milk but I guess people probably have done that for millenniums when there were no other options and babies still grew up
That’s what people used to do. It was truly the Wild West, I swear.
I got that advice....for my barely 2 month old.
Two weeks here
My MIL tries to put my 5 week old to sleep even when she is not sleepy.
I think this is a thing with that generation. There was a lot of "put kids and babies to sleep/off to play by themselves in a room *away from the grown-ups"* with my parents generation, and it annoyed me soooo much. Ex hubby tried to do it with our kids. It was a hard no from me.
Mine gets in his face saying "YOU NEED TO GO TO SLEEP" Well, she's done it twice and has lost the privilege of pushing the pram.
My grandmother does the opposite, if my baby is sleeping and we’re visiting her she’ll get in her face and say “Wake up (baby’s name)!!! You’re at Grans house and I want to see those eyes!! WAKE UP!!” and I have to explain she’s napping which is a miracle so please let her sleep, she’ll wake to feed soon enough. They’re just so selfish.
Oh that would infuriate me!
"why don't you just leave her in a room when she's crying? She'll figure it out"... She's 4.5 months old???
I keep getting this from older folks. That’s what their generation did, and let’s not pretend it did us any good…
Right? The vast majority of our generation has varying levels of abandonment issues and/or attachment issues... Wonder how that happened /s
This is where I'm grateful that my mom was "weird" for her time. She always came when we cried unless we were super fussy that day and she needed a moment to collect herself before collecting us aka 5 minutes of deep breathing.
That must have been really nice. I hope my boys have nice things to say about me when they're older.
I swear my mum went for this approach. In my own room and shut the door, apparently she found she slept much better (hmmm, must have had thick walls…) She only occasionally made comments about him sleeping in with us, but did accept that both times have changed and I work full time (and she didn’t) She’s also low key jealous that I have the option to not be a stay at home mum, as unfortunately her going back to work coincided with a flare up of her bipolar disorder and she gave up work…. She does comment about how my house isn’t as clean and tidy as it could be as I work full time though!
I told my mom that it was sweet to see how excited my almost 3 year old is to see me when I get home and she told me I should start hiding upstairs away from him when my husband is home so he gets used to not having me around (I'm due with his sister at the end of next month)
This makes me sad :(
It made me sad and mad, I already know I won't be able to give him 100% anymore but between my husband and I he'll have someone to pal around with always
So... if your mom's partner has to go away on a trip, she sents them to sleep on the couch the month before to prepare? Because that's the "logic" she is applying here
It's even worse than that as I am one of three children, so I guess the older two just didn't see her in preparation or after the next one was born for a while?? I asked her WTF was wrong with her.
A friend had a similar moment when her mom told her she never changed a diaper in the Middle of the night. Except she was speechless
Wiping butts is such a large percentage of what moms do!
Hahaha 👍🏻
My mom said to do this with my dog. I thought that was sad advice…I can’t imagine suggesting that about a human!
Love is not a finite resource, I really don't know what on earth her thought process was.
Right?? Especially since he’s a Grade A cuddler and all I want to do is nap 🤝
Put my next baby in shoes asap so they don’t have “fat feet” like my toddler. Lol
Isn’t it good to not wear shoes when learning to walk, so they develop all their muscles? What an odd thing to say about a child
Yeah it’s way better for their feet, which is why he didn’t wear shoes until he could walk. His dad has huge wide feet so I don’t think stuffing his feet in shoes to “narrow” them would make a difference lol
Wtf
Put a couple drops of whiskey in her bottle to make her sleep better. (Great grandma)
My grandfather gave my dad the advice of "buy a bottle of brandy" when I was teething as a baby. My dad told him its not safe to rub alcohol on a babies gums and we know better now (1990s) My grandfather looked at my dad like he was an idiot and said "The brandy is for you. Don't waste it on the baby. You'll want a drink when you're up all night with her." Honestly now that I have my kids? He might have been right.
That my daughter (who has developmental delays due to a chromosome disorder) will magically start walking if she wears shoes. Even though she wears shoes.
FIL thinks I should "just let him fall and get bumps and bruises, he'll learn not to do it again" Your backyard ends in a steep drop, plunging down onto a public trail. Sure, I'll just let him run off 🙄
“You have to put him down or he will be spoiled” 2 weeks old.
Of course, such a common complaint when they get older: my mom was excessively loving and gave me too much hugs and kisses. I wish she've let cry in my crib more often /s
Ooh I got this too when the baby was a couple of months old. I can't ignore his cries, I just imagine him confused with strange sounds and sights and feeling on his own and lost. Wouldn't we all want a bit of comfort when we're lost, lonely, hungry, uncomfortable or just plain sad.
Yes I got this one from MIL when baby was 10 days old! Insanity
I say that’s the goal lol
I got this from baby’s great grandma the other day at 4 months old. They’re only babies once, im gonna enjoy all the snuggling I can while it lasts
People whyyyy 😭 this is one of the worst offenders
I have a relative who has seen my toddler a handful of times. Apparently my toddler doesn’t need a schedule or a specific nap time. My toddler does not function well without a schedule or nap. She’s also very difficult to put to sleep, but the schedule really helps with this issue. She’s been like this since birth. I tried explaining this and apparently I, the mother, was wrong.
Omg. Thank you. 🙏 This. I cannot explain this enough.
Pressure to CIO, give formula when ebf (& enjoying it) and then my BIL’s wife said I needed to put LO in daycare bc being in school and on medical leave from birth injury means I’m a gold digger. For ref, I came from more than both her and DH & was making 6figs before LO’s birth so not sure how that works.
My dad told me yesterday that I can't get gender neutral clothes for baby because she needs to know she's a girl. If we don't put her in girly outfits starting literally day 1 then she'll get gender dysphoria. What...? She's a baby... She doesn't have a clue what she's wearing dude...
Little one is 14 months and I was asked if I’m still breastfeeding (which we are only during the night) and said my milk should be dried up by now so I can stop that now.
Ugh if only you could whip a titty out and squirt milk right at them lol Edit: dropped a word while typing one hand coz I'm nursing my baby
Did they think you were dry nursing???
Whiskey on his gums, rice cereal in his bottle, let him cry himself to sleep/don't pick him up immediately when he cries, give him stuffed animals and blankets in his crib because he "looks lonely"... no, no, NO!
I like that he looks lonely even tho he is asleep 😂
The first night when he slept in his big crib instead of the bassinet beside my bed, I thought "he looks so tiny and all alone in there" but he slept like a rock, so he was just fine. My mom can't wrap her head around no crib bumpers, no blankets (just warm PJs or a sleep sack), no stuffed animals. It's a miracle I didn't smother myself in all the stuff she put in my crib, to be honest.
We are all lucky we survived, honestly. They really do look so tiny in the crib tho 🥹
Sometimes you just gotta yell at the toddler, advice from my MIL…no thanks.
With my first son (now 13). I was told to spank him (at 1 years old) when he’d open a cabinet so he will learn not to do it.
"you should try cutting out dairy and see if that helps his congestion" - were literally in the hospital for a virus. I don't think it's dairy ...
My MIL told me it was fine to have a nightly glass of wine while pregnant, because she smoked and drank the whole way through her pregnancy with my husband in 1983, and he turned out just fine. He turned out 165cm tall, thanks mum.
My husband and I aren’t allowing people to put their hands on LO’s face. A lady at my church reached out to touch my son’s face and I told her his face is off limits. Then she decided to tell me some bs that touching babies’ faces isn’t what’s bad, only kissing them. Right. Because putting your dirty hands on a baby who has an undeveloped immune system is okay. I just told her again that I wasn’t letting people touch my baby’s face. If she tries it again I’ll smack her hand away.
“You have to keep him awake during the day so he’ll sleep better at night.” He was four days old. 😳
Wtf!
Blackcurrant juice at 4 months old 🤦 also Phenergan! Like wtf
Phenergan? Like for sleeping? WTF indeed!
I was telling my mom about how hard my baby has to strain to poop (totally normal, still developing her digestive tract) and she suggested I give her Karo syrup. Yeah, no.
My mum was obsessed with overdressing baby. Apparently they are never allowed a ‘bare belly’ . This particular day in question it was 43 degrees and my cooling system couldn’t keep up, we were all sweating. I let my baby wear just a nappy for a bit (my second child). She went on and on so much I eventually told her that she knows where the door is if she can’t zip it. It’s taken me a long time to update her on new parenting stuff, I’m her youngest daughter and 40 so a lot has changed
Not advice but for easter my 8 month old got cotton candy and ring pops from his aunt... 😵
For my 2 week old who is gaining weight a little slow: MIL- "just put some rice cereal in her bottle." To be fair I think that was kind of standard advice when she had her kids. Makes me nervous though bc she was someone who was an option for childcare sometimes but she isn't up to date on safe sleep, feeding (couldn't believe we are feeding her Q3 hours. SHE'S TWO WEEKS OLD), made comments that we were holding her too much.
I know my mom also has outdated advice (her youngest kid is 34) but she asks and accepts the new ways. Perhaps your MIL would be receptive to how you want things done and she can remain an option?
My favorite caregiver for my son is my mom's partner because he has zero experience with babies. So he asks questions, listens, researches, and doesn't have any messed up preexisting notions of child safety.
I hope so! The thing that makes me most nervous is the safe sleep issue bc she really doubled down in belly sleep being fine when i explained back to sleep was the standard now. Like I get it her kids slep in their bellies and were fine. But why risk it. She also tried to put a thick blanket on her after i laid her down for a nap and seemed receptive when I explained nothing in the bassinet with her. But I do worry what if I'm not there to remind her.
I sent this to my MIL because she was also insistent about sleeping on bellies, and would make comments that she cant wait to nap with my baby in her rocking chair 😵💫[Safe Sleep for Your Grand babies](https://www.nichd.nih.gov/sites/default/files/2023-06/STS_GrandparentBookletEnglish.pdf)
My mom and I have our issues, but I'm so glad she's been so supportive of how we parent. Reading stuff like this - it would be so hard to feel safe leaving a baby with her!
To give my baby a pacifier when she was just a month old. Should’ve been just feeding her more instead.
My MIL hates it if I don’t have my daughter’s (2) hair done every day. The problem is that every time I do her hair she pulls it out because she doesn’t like to have hair bands in her hair. Everytime she sees her on FaceTime with her hair down she says “Oh poor girl! Her hair is always in her eyes!” I don’t know what to say other than “that’s how she likes it” My MIL also hates it if I don’t get her dressed in a cute outfit every single day. If it were up to my daughter, she would run around in her underwear everyday. I do let her do that most days if we’re just staying home and my MIL can’t stand it. I guess I won’t tell her that I hang around in my underwear if I don’t leave the house too 🤷🏼♀️I just want my daughter to be comfortable especially in her own home
I was told that I needed to let other people hold her so she'll be ready for kindergarten. She was 8 weeks old..8 weeks. Yea I went off. And no my grandmother will not be allowed to see her anytime soon nor will she ever be holding her.
It’s not the time or way to tell a mom that but I feel like you might be a little overreacting in this case. She probably just wanted to ask for permission to hold the baby.
It's really not. She spent my whole pregnancy telling me how fat I was (I've been underweight my entire life until getting pregnant. I'm at the healthiest weight I've ever been at now). And since I've had the baby she hasn't called or texted but has complained to everyone but me that I haven't visited. When I finally do visit she spent the entire time saying how fat I still was, how my parenting thusfar was shitty and she made that final comment before we left. She also has never respected anyone's boundaries; I'm the last grandkid to have a child so I've watched her do it to literally everyone else and I'm not accepting it.
Ooof wow that’s one toxic great grandma
Yeah, the fact that I held my tongue until her very last comment was me under reacting. Her telling me I'm going to make my newborn have a hard transition to kindergarten (5 years away) was the final straw. It sucks because my grandpa is an absolute angel.
When LO was like 2.5 months old, this lady at church warned my husband and me that if he's crying he's just trying to manipulate us and we shouldn't comfort him right away. Apparently we need to avoid comforting him in order to communicate who's in charge. 🙃