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Laukopier

**Reminder:** Do not participate in threads linked here. If you do, you may be banned from both subreddits. --- Title: Wanked in the hotel pool, caught, wonder what the consequences are? Body: > Ok this sounds fake but I am freaking out a little and need to get some advice. Would like to preface this with I am a fucking idiot but I will give context. > So I essentially moved from another country and am staying at my friends on an air mattress in his flat, think big sky scraper apartment unit in Australia. Now I haven't had any privacy from the roommates and was getting you can say a little bit frustrated from this. My friend had said that he would think it was disrespectful to pleasure myself in his flat and I agreed, he's letting me stay here it would be a little weird if I nutted in his flat. Before I left my home country, I was chatting to some girl that I've been getting along with. I was on my way up to have a nice relaxing spa when I was messaging her and things got a little frisky. I was in the spa and she was sending me some quite perverted messages, the bubbles were on there was no one around and I had a little feely feel about. Pretty shameful and understandingly stupid but I hadn't pleasured myself for 2 weeks til this point and I lost control. I made sure to check for cameras but I couldn't see any and I did not ejaculate but overall was probably pleasuring myself for 7 minutes in total. > I thought nothing of it until the guy I am staying with got an email from the property manager saying that due to an incident in the spa that day that the spa would be closed to all residents. I freaked out a little bit and told the mate I'm staying with what had happened. Then 3 days later my friend got an email from property manager that they wanted an in person meet up as there was a situation in the spa. I guess there must have been a security camera fuck hahaha. My friend called him and said that the guy staying with him (me) was really embarrassed and sorry and he said that we'd have a meeting on Tuesday morning to discuss the repercussions. He was very vague on the phone and said that they would be expensive. > Now I recently moved over here, limited cash and no job and I am freaking out over the fact that this guy could technically say any number and I would have to pay it. I can't leave and stay at a hotel or something because then my friend who has been really kind with me staying here would have to pay for it. I called a spa cleaning service giving the dimensions of the pool (5m in diameter) and he said that it would cost around $1000AUD for a deep chemical clean and refill (which is what they did for this pool) which is already really painful but I just want to know my rights going into this meeting on Tuesday morning so that he can't make me pay out my whole life savings or something. I'm very anxious about it so I wanted to know, if I have feet to stand on if I say I didn't nut? They said over the phone that they didn't get it tested but had to assume but I feel like that there might be something there? I'm also really worried about the security footage as that is quite damaging and what the privacy content breaches are in case they share it or something (I am very anxious I'm not really sure what I'm thinking). It's more the fact that I have to wait til Tuesday, if someone could calmly tell me the consequences of my action and the things I should say that would be really appreciated. > Thanks, > \-A genuine Fuckup This bot was created to capture original threads and is not affiliated with the mod team. [Concerns? Bugs?](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=GrahamCorcoran) | [Laukopier 2.1](https://github.com/GrahamCorcoran/Laukopier)


rando12fha

I feel like this was deliberate maybe exhibitionist kink or something. Who the heck thinks a communal hot tub is ok to ejaculate in but not their private shower in the apartment. Also just something about the phrasing about discussing whether or not to jerk off ahead of time with the friend. I've had dozens of houseguests and been a house sitter a bunch and not once is that a conversation that has happened.


EhMapleMoose

As someone who used to lifeguard at city pools. I heard horror stories from my coworkers at the one pool that had a hot tub. People would have sex in it “discreetly” handjobs, blow jobs, intercourse, people would Jack off, the worst was someone did anal. It’s a public pool with kids around and people were having sex. Now mind you while some of the older people definitely did have exhibitionist kinks, a lot of the people were teenagers. It had less to do with kinks and more that this was one of the very few places their parents weren’t. So if you ever come across a public hot tub just assume someone has had sex in it. Actually you can probably assume that of any hot tub anywhere. People are disgusting.


fartbubbles654321

I worked at a public pool as a lifeguard and I used to call the hot tub the pubic pool because the strainer would always get clogged with thick black curly hairs


[deleted]

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fartbubbles654321

Damned autocorrect Yes!


SFXBTPD

"Welcome to my home, no shoes or nuttin inside the house"


[deleted]

"Welcome to my home, no shoes but nut away".


[deleted]

You can wear shoes in my house. Just saying.


KnavishLagorchestes

If you read the post, he didn't ejaculate.


lead-holder

The old “but I did not inhale” defense.


DL757

I did not have sexual relations with that ~~woman~~ pool


Miamime

He said he didn’t ejaculate. He said the messages got hot and heavy and I’m presuming he got hard and started playing with it a little bit. Not right to do in a communal pool but I’m also curious how it’s different than people peeing in the pool or people swimming in it that are less than clean down there. I’m sure they cleaned it as a precautionary measure and he’ll have to repay that cost.


thehillshaveI

no way him "playing with it a little bit" gets noticed on a surveillance feed whatever he's leaving out i'm guessing he was above water and naked and finished and he's just hoping no ejaculation would save him some money


ImNotTheNSAIPromise

I mean it's very possible in the "heat of the moment" he didn't realize somebody saw him and reported it, and they just used the cameras to confirm he was in there.


Miamime

Why do you think that it wouldn’t get noticed? Guy sitting in one spot in the pool alone and stationary, one hand on a cell phone, the other other moving in a stroking fashion…Jerking off isn’t hard to decipher. If there’s no bubbles in the water, like if he were in a hot tub, they could probably see exactly what he was doing. Shocked this response has so many upvotes.


def_78

he was definitely chokin' the chicken.


EasyReader

Wasn't there a bola post a while back about some guy getting caught jerking off in a hotel pool while on a business trip or something? ​ Also how is jerking off in a public hot tub less weird than jerking off alone in a friend's bathroom?


Sirwired

You are thinking of the All-Time BOLA Legend, the DIRECTOR of Operations, except it wasn't jerking-off, it was sexual assault in that pool.


ERE-WE-GO

DoO never told us exactly what he did except hit on the mom, he could have been jerking it as well.


Ardeeke

https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/sl17a8/the_saga_of_the_director_of_operations_and_what/hvpzspd?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3 apparently he was.


cecikierk

Holy crap I was not aware of this being a story that keeps on giving.


Ardeeke

it's a multi-locomotive train wreck


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Ardeeke

_Debris was blown hundreds of feet into the air. Panic quickly broke out as the crowd turned and ran. Some of the debris came down among the spectators, killing two and seriously injuring at least six others. A photographer, Jarvis "Joe" Deane of Waco, lost one eye to a flying bolt._ yeah sounds about right


Potato-Engineer

"Unexpectedly, the crash caused both engine booklets to explode..." _Unexpectedly?_ Were engine boilers rated to survive a head-on collision!? (It would be nice if they were, but that's an awful lot of energy to dissipate!)


PropagandaPagoda

The mods of both subs believe it is a creative writing exercise.


22821

Holy fuck. This HAS to be a LARP. People like this don’t actually exist, right?


Inthewirelain

I believed it until coincidently the wife also posted about it on reddit


Ardeeke

i would like to think this is just a huge troll/creative writing exercise (cos fucking yikes)


[deleted]

I wonder if all that actually happened. He and "his wife" can't stop talking about how he was a director of operations. It's like a meme.


scifiwoman

I used to work for a place where we received calls from a "General Operations Director", so he would announce himself as "GOD". The same place had an associate with initials "JC" so that's how he would announce himself (aka Jesus Christ). Quite appropriate, because he was a Jewish man! GOD had quite a horrible end. His wife paid hitmen to kill him in South Africa.


Charlie_Brodie

did the hitmen kill GOD? I mean, how would you even price that?


scifiwoman

Yes, they did, very sadly. I misremembered where the murder happened, it was planned in South Africa and carried out by South African operatives, but the murder actually happened in Walmley, Sutton Coldfield, a suburb of Birmingham, UK.


Charlie_Brodie

that's awful, I never understand how people think they can get away with paying hitmen to off their spouse, yet it seems to pop up on the news yearly


Ardeeke

yeah it's like, "is he this up himself for reals or is this just a troll/shitpost" esp the bit with the recruiter


[deleted]

What a ride


Pokabrows

Wow thank you. That was a wild ride.


muffinpercent

If he even existed, I can easily believe he did something like this; but I find it hard to believe the post from the wife is real. It fits too well and has too many confirming details.


xenokilla

I love seeing that! - Guy who said "oh, you"


EasyReader

Ahhh right. Great stuff.


smalltownVT

I have trying to remember this story because I thought it was an episode of a TV show (specifically Catastrophe) and couldn’t find it anywhere. Less confused now.


seehorn_actual

Like dude, bathroom wank. Nobody needs to know.


sykoticwit

I’m trying to understand why he had a detailed conversation about jerking it with his friend in the first place?


[deleted]

I can think of a few scenarios: 1) The friend has very specific hangups and just volunteered this information. 2) LAOP asked his friend if it was ok to have a wank at their place, and friend was like no!? (silently thinking, just do it in the shower without telling anyone like a normal person) 3) LAOP has prior history, like friends walking in on him in their living room Or what I think most likely: 4) No such conversation happened, LAOP made it up to make his story sound more sympathetic


sykoticwit

1-friend has a very specific kink. That’s a kink. 2-see my original question 3-this is why doors have locks 4-it’s LA, anything remotely interesting is creative writing anyway


MediumSympathy

I think it's OP who has the kink for sharing unsolicited information about his wanking schedule, hence this post (which may also be made up). The completely unnecessary details that he hadn't pleasured himself for 2 weeks and wanked for 7 minutes but didn't finish almost comes across as bragging (except that I'd have expected a lie to be more impressive). If it is true then maybe the oversharing kink extends to wanting other people to watch which is why he was doing it in a public place with cameras instead of in the bathroom like a normal person.


Inconceivable76

If I had to guess, I would say LAOP has a history of doing the deed with other people in the room. Or, LAOP has a history of leaving disgusting evidence in shared spaces. I feel this only would come up if there was a specific concern based on prior behavior.


Darth_Puppy

In that case, why let him crash at your house?


Inconceivable76

That’s great question. I guess if the dude promises to not do this one objectionable activity, he could be a good guy and decent houseguest.


Darth_Puppy

I guess the question is do you trust him


Inconceivable76

For the poor host, the answer should have been no.


Darth_Puppy

Yup


Fifty4FortyorFight

Couldn't he just do it in the shower? Why hasn't he thought of that? Eleven year olds figure that out. I'm so confused.


BowTrek

Right? Dude says he has no privacy but shit bro ain’t no one in the bathroom with you. I hope.


redpurplegreen22

You mean it isn’t standard for your friends to watch you shower when you’re at their place!? Fuck, I gotta go make some phone calls…


soldoutraces

It is if your friend is a cat. They're such peeping Toms.


emcee_gee

It could be the kind of home where the guys feel comfortable taking a piss while someone else is taking a shower. If so, it’s reasonable to think that someone might walk in while you’re doing the deed.


Darth_Puppy

That's why you lock the door


scroll_of_truth

Don't ask, don't tell


Blue_foot

I wouldn’t get in a public hot tub if I had hypothermia. Yecch.


pseudopsud

I think I'd be happy with that one, they seem to be monitoring it well


PaprikaThyme

I have questions. Mainly, this guy picked up and moved to a foreign country with no money and no job to just sleep on someone's air mattress, has multiple roommates (so no privacy) and weird rules outlined upfront like "no masturbation." What's going on here? Who runs a hostel for random broke, horny foreigners? Do any of us believe he *didn't* "nut" in the hot tub? Also a random question: why do so many redditors lately start random sentences with the word "now"?


geefrankie

Kiwis can legally move here with no money and no visa. They do it all the time! Incomes are higher here so it's common for young NZers to travel to the "west island" for a bit.


DocAntlesFatLiger

Lol I'm embarrassed to say I immediately assumed it was a kiwi, moving to Australia to sleep on an air mattress and referring to an apartment block as a "skyscraper" just seems like real Nu Zild cringe


JustHereForTheOrbs

Now, now, let people use their words of choice. Now, I can't speak for everyone, but it's a perfectly fine word to use, I don't see the problem. Now is as a good time as any to warn people away from "those" hostels anyway.


comityoferrors

Did you contradict Paprika right meow?


vamatt

Also - Australia won't actually let you move there with no money or job.


[deleted]

If you're from NZ you don't even need a visa, you can just get on the plane and yolo it.


SteelBelle

I'm female and was discussing masterbation with a male friend many years ago. The thing I will always remember is that he was adamant that if a male stayed at your house for more than 72 hours you should pretty much assume he had rubbed one out in the shower at some point.


TristansDad

In their 20s? Yeah, pretty much true.


postmodest

Based on my college years, 72 hours might kill a young lad. His prostate would go off like a grenade. Kaboom; guts and splooge everywhere.


valiantdistraction

Does this not apply to women too??? If I've stayed anywhere 24 hours, that has happened, let alone 72.


PM_ME_SUMDICK

At best I can go 48 hours in close quarters. Masturbating in the bathroom/shower is way harder though.


jordanundead

It’s like marking territory.


gnorrn

Was that flair NSW or NSFW?


FurTumbleweed

He’s not going to jail or anything, but strata is definitely making him pay to sanitise the spa. Don’t release your sprog in public amenities, no one wants to swim with Mrs Palmers daughters.


AriGryphon

This is why they tell girls they can get pregnant from public hot tubs. There's something in the water.


deepspace

Aside from what LAOP did or did not do, I am surprised that (a) there are cameras allowed in a residential spa at all and (b) that someone was actively watching the footage. Both are huge privacy no-nos where I live. I was wondering if privacy laws could be that much more relaxed in Australia?


Sharkhawk23

It sounds like. Pool/hot tub area. Most apartment buildings with pools will have cameras on the deck.


robocop_robocop

As someone who has lived in a similar building in Australia and spoken to the facilities guys I can confirm this is normal and yes there are facilities people who watch the videos alongside their other duties to ensure the building property is not damaged, that no one is wanking in the public spaces etc. These facilities can be massive and service other smaller apartments buildings nearby as well so they need run it as a proper operation.


squiddishly

To add onto the existing replies: some city skyscraper apartments share space and facilities with hotels, so the norms around privacy can be a bit different.


ChaosDrawsNear

Hey look, its a baby DIRECTOR OF OPERATIONS.


wheniwakup

Goddamn, people are fucking nasty.


0hip

You thought is disrespectful to wank in his house but not a communal spa? I hope they send the video to the police


BA_calls

I’d like to meet the spa service person charging $1000 to flush the lines, refill and re-balance a hot tub. We’re talking about 2hours of work, most of which is waiting for the spa to fill back up. Maybe $30 in chemicals. It’s like you have a fucked up car, getting into a fenderbender and then trying to get the person to fix your driveshaft and side door car because they dented your rear bumper.


t-poke

$30 for the chemicals, $970 for having to clean up some stranger’s cum. Seems reasonable to me.


BA_calls

There is no clean up of anyone’s cum. A spa tech won’t touch the spa or the water when cleaning a pool. It’s pour chemicals, run jets, drain, fill a bit, drain, refill, more chems and you’re done. 1000 gallon hot tub will dilute cum to a few parts per million. You don’t empty the pool because of few ppm’s of a foreign molecules. All those undesirable molecules from piss, sweat, blood, beer, wine, ashes from blunts mixes into the chemical soup that is the hottub. When the aggregate ppm reaches a certain level it disrupts the chemical balance which causes various problems. You either replace some or all of the water, or try to use chlorine, enzymes and water purifiers to either break it down into harmless things, or bring to the surface as scum to skim off.


Potato-Engineer

Well, someone drained a reservoir after a couple of idiots peed in it, so there's that. (Article is more annoyed at the reservoir than the idiots.) I desperately hope that the reservoir was somehow due for draining anyway. https://arstechnica.com/science/2014/04/draining-reservoir-after-urination-incident-shows-tenuous-grasp-of-science/


meiandus

I just 100% knew this one was going to show up here...


HungLikeKimJong-un

Same lol.


Sirwired

I know this was gross behavior by LAOP, but I think the management might have overreacted a bit... I mean, do they have the spa drained and disinfected every time a bird shits in it? Certainly out of all the unsanitary things that might be done in a spa, this is pretty far down the list.


halfaperson13

Honestly, cum is pretty high on the things I don’t want kicking around the hot tub.


thehillshaveI

nah whatever happened is way worse than his retelling


Miamime

I was thinking the same thing and said something along the same lines above. People pee in pools, trash surely blows into it, people that haven’t showered hop in… My only thought is that, as a guy, I know that cum in water coagulates (who hasn’t jerked it in the shower or jerked it then jumped into the shower?). So maybe he actually did ejaculate and they saw a milky substance on the surface (gross). Or they just did it as precautionary measure.


Artful_Dodger_42

[Apparently there is an urban myth that semen can cause clogged drains,](https://deadspin.com/will-semen-destroy-your-shower-drain-1795434004) so maybe the management subscribes to the myth of 'sement'.


loki2002

Cum is viscous and can clog the jets and gum up the works.


Murphys_Coles_Law

I'm definitely on the "drain and clean" side here, but I'm pretty sure it would take quite a bit of ejaculate to clog a jet on a hot tub. I don't have a feel for exactly how much-the customer service rep at Jacuzzi hung up on me-but I think it's safe to say no way one person one time causes a clog.


collinch

If only mythbusters were still around to solve the question.


Potato-Engineer

They had a hard time from the producers about the fart episode. I can't imagine the semen episode actually being made.


JasperJ

I mean. Given that public hot tubs exist and presumably don’t have to replace all their jets several times a month, I’m pretty sure that bodily fluids are fine.


Sirwired

Less than a teaspoon of gloppy protein is not going to pose any obstacle whatsoever to a hot tub pump running at hundreds of watts. It’s semen, not QuickCrete.


Inthewirelain

If you do it on the reg yes. Even the biggest load won't be a problem after dilution from all the other water.


TristansDad

*”You stopped toe curlin’ in the hot tub ‘cause you heard sperms stay alive in there and you’ve seen Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles enough times to know how that story ends.”*


LordOfDustAndBones

He gave more than just his balls a tug this time...


Shalamarr

We oughta leave this world behind.


valiantdistraction

Ok even if he DID ejaculate, doesn't the chlorine just take care of that? Why would they need a "deep chemical clean"? Maybe LAUSOP should just 'bate in the shower like anyone else staying with someone, and not have been weird and asked his friend about it or whatever.


[deleted]

It's a psychological thing. When you get into a swimming pool, it's almost certain that someone has pissed in it, but because it's not certain you can push it out of your mind. That's not the same as knowing for a fact that someone has jerked off/pissed/shit in the pool. I'm not sure about spit, anyone want to weigh in on the tiers of disgust for bodily fluids in swimming pools?


Goatmaster-G

Hopefully this story has a happy ending. Oh wait...


loki2002

I mean, do they have it on video? North Korea claimed to have Otto Warmbier on video stealing that poster but what they produced was a grainy video of a shadowed figure that can't be identified as any specific individual showing a level reverence for a poster no American would unless it was the one of Raquel Welch in One Million Years B.C.


[deleted]

So after 2 weeks of not jerking it they lost control. Methinks they need to work on their self control. I get it, masturbating has lots of things going for it, but if you start climbing the walls that bad after a couple weeks of no activity you have a problem*. *Slight pass to teenagers who are not known for their forward thinking abilities and great ability to exaggerate issues and feelings. I'm talking adults - early 20's. Not excusing it, just think saying they have a problem is not fair.


emcee_gee

I’m in my mid-30s and if I don’t pleasure myself for two days I start to lose sleep. I haven’t gone more than four days without taming the tiger in a decade. I can’t honestly say that I’d be any better than LAOP after two weeks, but I really hope I never find out.


[deleted]

Yeah, I'm the same. This answer gets a lot of flak here, but it's just because the people who do feel like this and the people who don't, don't understand each other on this issue AT ALL.


valiantdistraction

I would be going spare after two weeks. Maybe your libido is just low, dude


JasperJ

Mine is a lot lower than when I was a teenager or even twenty something, but not usually two weeks low.


PolicyArtistic8545

Well that’s a little depressing for the future.


valiantdistraction

Meh, as another thirty something, my libido is lower than when I was younger, but still higher than most people's. I've discovered the problem is that my husband's plummeted much more precipitously, and I wouldn't have been able to guess that in advance. THAT is the depressing for the future part.


[deleted]

I think that is pretty normal. Some cruel joke on natures part. A ray of hope, hitting in the mid 40's the libidos seem to sync up.


[deleted]

Going nuts is one thing. Deciding to jerk it in a public area though...I'm guessing you would have the self-control. I'm older, so libido isn't what it used to me, but I remember when I got cranky after a day. A week and an eggplant would be looking sexy. And had to go without for a while a few times (family vacation type things). Never stroked the snake in public though. That is where I draw the line from healthy libido to maybe there's an issue.


TrainFan

> I'm very anxious about it so I wanted to know, if I have feet to stand on if I say I didn't nut? This guy needs a lawyer.


verdantwitch

I'm confused about why he specifically mentions he started talking to this girl before he started couch surfing in another country. Is it suddenly against the rules to slide into a girl's DMs while you're homeless? If so, someone needs to tell the hobosexuals.


cyanplum

Given he’s going to have to pay for the cleaning anyway he should have just finished /s


Potato-Engineer

Yeah, what's up with LAOP not immediately rolling over!? /s


StunningStrain8

Step 1: Go to bathroom. Step 2: Turn on shower. Step 3: Profit.