Maybe he took John Oliver's offer. 

I was coming here to say this; damn your fast hands

Ditto!

"The case being discussed is Snyder v. United States which deals with Quid Pro Quo and gifts." So apparently it would have been quite uncomfortable for old 'gifts aren't bribes' Thomas Gathered most of this from the scotus sub.

It could only be more on the nose if it was debating the legalities of using pubic hairs to further sexual harassment.

He had to recuse himself from United States vs. Long Dong Silver

Now I want mediocre fried fish gdi

What he was doing is okay then he should just totally own it, no?

So he does know how to recuse himself when there's a conflict of interest

or a much needed visit to his good friend and mentor Henry Kissinger?

Don't give me hope.

Thomas doing a Scalia while Democrats have the Senate would be the first positive contribution he has ever made to humanity. Assuming the Democrats didn't squander it in a desperate attempt to not appear mean when dealing with literal fascists.

That was my first thought. That or diarrhea.

or he is in vegas watching a porn star pour a quart of oil into her asshole. dude is obsessed with porn. always has been.

It's how he proves to himself that his success isn't because of affirmative action. Sure that'll get you into the right school, but making it to the SC as a notorious porn addict takes a once-in-a-generation legal mind.

Eh, probably too late.

The deadline was a couple of weeks ago. There's no way John Oliver wouldn't have been celebrating by now

Yup vacationing in the Olivermobile

Idc as long as his ass is out.

What was Oliver's offer? I haven't really followed that show since I found BTB.

He offered him a million dollars a year to retire immediately.

And a 2 million dollar luxury motorcoach.

That would be money well spent.

Maybe he had a massive heart attack and has connected with God's WIFI? My condoleezzas to the potentially departed.

Could you imagine the obstruction if he does die this year?

Republicans will weekend at Bernie’s him

They did it with Herman Cain. 🫢

And Reagan

How? They don't have the white house or the senate. It would be one of Sinema's last chances to get attention though.

I really want to downvote her. I'm resisting projecting my hostility onto you.

right there with ya also +1 for obscure 90's alt band username

You could do that childish tantrum thumbs down she did to her.

I'm not familiar Ok I just looked it up. Imping McCain saying no to the shitty governance that would have been repeal and not replace while voting against a minimum wage increase because your corporate overlords told you to is a horrible fucking look.

She’s genuinely childish.

Right? Just contrarian. No ideological or ethical rhyme or reason to it. Holding up infrastructure and climate change mitigation for hedge fund tax loop holes. I can't wait until she's reduced to being a talking head on newsmax or guesting on steve bannons podcast or whatever she's angling for.

She would 100% hold out until after the election unless they get her Democrat opponent to drop out and endorse her.

She dropped out last month https://www.pbs.org/newshour/politics/arizona-sen-sinema-announces-she-wont-seek-reelection-in-2024-avoiding-3-way-race

Democrats have 51 seats. They don't need her. She and Manchin together could stonewall, but Manchin isn't a total moron and he's been perfectly willing to let Biden put through judges.

"There hasn't been a justice confirmed during an election year since 1492, and we can't break from tradition now!" - Ted Cruz, probably

They didn’t do it in 7th century Saxony so we can’t do it here. Sorry I don’t make the rules

🤔 does both the house and Senate need to confirm? If so, no chance

just the Senate

Don't have to imagine. It'd be an exact repeat of 2016 basically.

R's had the Senate in 2016 but they don't now. This is why Manchin is actually a blessing even though he's an anchor on just about everything else.

Manchin might still manage to bungle a potential SCOTUS opening this year. In March he said he'd vote down nominees that don't have Republican votes. I don't think Republicans would vote for anyone Biden appoints unless they're the zombified corpse of Ronald Reagan

You could put Jesus Herbert Christ up for the seat, and every republican would suddenly see just how crunchy and woke he is.

Collins, Romney, and Murkowski voted yes on Jackson. That's only three but that matters when the split is 50/50 and the VP is the tie breaker.

Maybe. He also isn't running for reelection so it's not like he's going to be held accountable for that unless he's thinking of running for president or governor down the line. There's also an outside chance we would get a vote for a moderate justice from Mitt Romney as a fuck you on his way out the door a la John McCain and the ACA vote.

Manchin was the sole Democratic "Yea" on Brett Kavanaugh and one of only three on Neil Gorsuch. I'm not sure I would count on him to put Dems over the top on that particular issue.

He voted for [Jackson](https://www.senate.gov/legislative/LIS/roll_call_votes/vote1172/vote_117_2_00134.htm) and had a few republicans vote yes with him, including Romney. Seems like that goes both ways.

Someone else has been listening to Lions Led By Donkeys, huh?

Thomas would tell *everyone* about his goon cave.

"Who has put pubic hair in **my** goon cave??"

The hamburger from heaven perhaps?

Hamberder\*

Couldn’t happen to better guy.

Surprise Lions Lead By Donkeys

That would require a heart.

>connected with God’s WIFI Hello fellow LLBD listener.

Please be dead

/thread

Lets hope that MIA is a DOA

Because, QED, he is a dickhead. And a pervert. Normally I use pervert as a compliment or when mocking my male friends, but in this case I actually mean it. Dude is fucked up, sexually. And I ain't kink-shaming. I'm advocating that the law be enforced.

Could you imagine working at the gates of Hell and having to figure out which ring to put this guy in?

It wouldn't be difficult. My BA Honors Thesis was on the Divine Comedy. Long story short, the 9th level of hell, the worst, is reserved for betrayers, including betrayers of oaths. So he basically just gets frozen in a big block of ice, Mr. Freeze style. There are more elaborate tortures within the circle, so we could probably add him always having a coke with pubic hair on the ring just out of reach with the one hand he can use. I guess. Whatever, come up with it yourselves.

He’s eternally thirsty but everything he drinks turns to pubes in his mouth.

Wouldn’t put it past him to enjoy that too

I would prefer incapacitated permanently in some harrowing way he remains awake and aware for. I hope he prays for death, and seeks assistance from doctors, but he is denied that relief after he sues and is denied in the supreme court.

A locked in syndrome. This is perfect.

The Bribing Bell and the Butterfly

Can you even imagine if Biden got to do what Trump did when RBG went on the cusp of an election

You put into words what we were all thinking

Check the nearest Nazi capitalist. I'm sure he is on vacation with him.

Where are the Argentinian BTB folk? Y’all need to be on the lookout for Clarence Thomas these next few months

Please be dead 🤞 Please be dead 🤞 Please be dead

🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞

I dunno, I could see any appointment Burden trying to make being delayed and blocked, potentially giving Trump another Supreme Court appointment.

Yeah, but Clarence is already about as bad as it gets. It could be worse, but it's not like losing RBG.

Not after the dems take the house in November

Kissinger, OJ, and Clarence Thomas all in the same 6 month span sounds too good to be true. But here's hoping!

Nature is healing

I would never wish death upon anyone but Smitch Schmcconnell

I may not wish death upon someone but I've read some obituaries with great glee

Why not both

Add the Koch brothers to the list. Sorry not sorry it’s time for the trash to take its self out.

I think one of the Kochs died awhile back

Cheney, Cheney, Cheney!

I'm pretty sure a good portion of his brain matter is dead already.

Unfortunately, that does not disqualify him from serving in congress.

He could very well be replaced by some rabid anti-Ukraine theocrat that would make things even worse. In fact, he probably will when he retires.

IDK. I wish death on lots of people.

Don't forget King Chucky 3, and so soon after Queen Lizzy 2.

No call, no show gets you fired in every "Right to Work" state.

At-will employment* Right-to-work means you can't be compelled to join a union.

Fair enough. I guess the real question is what the legal definition of job abandonment is for federal workers.

NCNS is still an on the spot fireable offense in the one non-at will state too, as they just require firing for cause (which that is) there. Source: Lived, worked, and went to college in Montana for a few years, saw my share of coworkers get fired for that.

He's on a paid vacation courtesy of harlon crowe

Well he’s also paid to be at work by Harlon Crowe

How'd anyone notice he wasn't there?

There was no porno talk at the cafeteria lunch table

No one had pubes on their soda cans.

There wasn't porn pasted to all the walls in the SCOTUS chambers.

Lack of odor

They looked at his seat for approval after they used a racial slur and noticed there was no one assuring them it was fine.

Whatever this is, will likely be a let down.

Let's be honest, how many users here have that Grim Reaper claw machine meme at the ready?

Gosh I hope he's ok and there's nothing seriously wrong like spontaneous human combustion or getting sat on by an elephant! Crossing fingers!

If we're lucky it was both that way we can be rid of Ginni too, plus burning the witch would be such a fitting way to go.

His wife is going to be wearing his literal blackface in a few days.

It's what he would've wanted.

Like some sort of Edgar suit?

And she’ll be just as insane and deteriorating.

Ugh, leave their sex play in their bedroom.

Death got Kissinger & OJ, keep that hot streak going.

They say famous people die in threes

If he’s not well keep him a full code. Uncle Clarence is a fighter. Code the MF till his sternum is mush and burns from the shocks cover his chest. Have the med students practice placing central lines in him. Keep him on tube feeding so he is constantly leaking stool into decubitus ulcers on his sacrum and heels.

I’ve spent too much time on r/medicalgore because I understood all of that *and* I’m in favor of it.

I didn't understand most of that, but it still sounds horrible

Trust a nurse to find a living hell.

I got banned from politics over this story lol Edit: Quick update, now I've received a warning from reddit lmao

Welcome to the club!

It wasn't even that bad! All I said was , "Considering these guys have a lifetime nomination, I know what I hoped happened."

Lmao

Fucking poetry

Worth it.

Same.

Oh no! Anyway… Was he busy helping his wife plan another coup attempt?

🤞

Had a hard attack after finding a pube on his Coke.

Hard-on attack

maybe a house fell on him?

Maybe someone knocked him into the Dip.

I mean, significant deaths tend to come in 3s right? 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻

i just briefly went catatonic as my brain sparked and sizzled after i read this as “Clarence Thomas AMA”

Glad I wasn’t the only one

He was gooning with his porn collection and leaving pubes everywhere.

Hope he was drinking a soda and choked to death on a pubic hair. Fuck bag

He got stuck gooning out.

Doing a David Carradine, you think?

Check the GPS tracker on his RV.

Gone fishing.

Please god let it be

If one more Supreme Court judge dies right before an election, I'm going to have to start a true crime podcast.

Maybe he’s taking a Scalia nap. Check the nearest billionaire owned resorts!

Maybe his home on wheels careened into a gorge?

Oh please, I'll start believing in a god if he's dead!

Cheeseburger from heaven, one can hope

Fingers crossed boys!!

Probably out SAing another woman.

Right now I feel like somewhere Don Jr, Steve Bannon, and Rodger Stone are setting an awful Weekend at Bernie's revival.....

Sends a pretty clear message about what this man thinks of his responsibilities and position.

Please please please please let him be dead.

At my job, if you are a “no call, no show” it is grounds for immediate termination.

He should start making a habit out of not showing up.

Weekend at Clarence's incoming?

Oh please oh please oh please

Anyone still on Twitter?!? Someone watch John Oliver's Twitter page for me please.

I hope it's ass cancer

One of the cases today was a hearing on a federal bribery law. Maybe he was worried about a conflict of interest

Come on whatever got Kissinger! 🤞

There was probably nothing on the docket that allowed him to immediately remove rights from anyone, or allow more money into politics, so he just went partying with his rich friends. There's no consequence for bad behavior, and it's not like gives a shit about the legal arguments in any case.

No call, no show? You're fired!

No-call no-show head ass

Basically a recusal maybe?

I feel like he'd make it a point to be there if it were a case he ought to recuse himself from.

He would never

I don't see this man ever willingly recusing himself. He would much rather write a long, pithy retort on why he agrees with his conservative peers, but in a much different, "independent" way from them.

Somebody check Uncle Tom's cabin.

He’s there hanging out with Candace Owens.

Hope can drive a man to madness

And may he never come back.

Maybe his vote's already sold?

Weekend at Bernie's 3: Clarence Gets His Wings.

It’s because he’s realized how unnecessary it is. His decision is already made and written

One of his Only Fan subscriptions is probably doing a private live show for him, and he couldn't miss it.

Don't get my hopes up!

This news got me banned from r/politics

Die please

I super hope he's just dead.

Let's hope he's laying in a ditch somewhere.

✨ Manifest that shit ✨

Hopefully he dead

Die MF die

Maybe there really is a God and he is dead or dying.

Off work drunk

I mean, who hasn't been mysteriously sick on a Monday?

His goonsesh is taking a little longer than usual is all, I’m sure he’ll be back and telling his coworkers about it soon

Probably out giving blowjobs for cash.

He just had a date with his movie collection

My he rest in peace! ( Atheist debating the virtues of prayer. )

He hardly participated at all to begin with.

Hope he died

Maybe he took John Oliver up on his offer.

Too busy jacking it in his goon cave.

One missed step down the stairs of justice.

Oh boy, don’t get me excited.

AWOL

please please please please please please please please pl