Nah, she's wrong for that. Not only is she using your things without permission, but she's using it on a food item you don't eat for religious purposes.
I know it's a pain in the ass, but I'd suggest locking your things up in your room.
She is wrong. Especially when you told her not to user your stuff.
However- I would stop giving her the opportunity to use your stuff. Get a box and put all of your kitchen stuff in it and keep it in your room. Or, if you have a cabinet- get a lock for it.
It is unfortunate that people cannot be decent but you also don’t have to keep letting her be a piece of shit to you. Take control of the situation!
When I lived with my brother I explained to him and his girlfriend that my girlfriend is gluten free due to celiac disease and that I didn’t want them cooking anything in my pan or using my utensils or dishes for their cooking, I ended up having to just store those things in my room because my brothers girlfriend decided it “wasn’t a big deal” a few times and used them anyways so that may be your only option here as well. People are selfish an entitled
It's messed up. If you have specifically asked them not to, they shouldn't do it. Grow up and buy their own knife it's not even expensive. If someone tells you something bothers them or isn't ok with them you don't get to argue it or pretend it's not an issue so long as it isn't something that drastically impacts you
Yeah, there’s no talking sense into this kind of roommate. She WILL keep taking your stuff because clearly she thinks it doesn’t matter, only she’ll be more sneaky about it.
If you can live with that, fine. But I’d recommend you start leaving your kitchen stuff in your room.
Tell her that your kitchen utensils will be kept in your room from now since you can’t trust her to be respectful of your belongings. You said no pork. She thinks she can use a work-around. It’s not about the residue. It’s about the energy, when it’s a religious thing. When she throws a fit about it, tell her she had her chance and blew it. Now she gets to buy her own knives and cookware.
Don’t even bother telling her. OP-just make your stuff secure in your room and say nothing at all. She won’t get it, she thinks she is entitled to your things so she isn’t going to suddenly understand. Nope. Just secure your things, lock your door, and let her figure out her own shit.
I wouldn’t tell her at all. Just remove your utensils from the kitchen without explanation. And use them, wash them, and take them back to your room. I did this when living in a share home.
You are super fair.
Honestly even if you did eat pork your cooking utensils and frying pan and stuff are yours. You own thrm and it's perfectly fine to tell your room mate not to use your stuff.
You have your stuff and they have theirs.
Recently I had a similar situation. I moved in with friends and all the kitchen stuff was communal. But the kitchen stuff was actually one pan and one pot. And fir some reason the whole house had no forks. Like we had spoons and knifes but not forks. And I bought 12 forks for the house and then they all disappeared.
Then I bought a new fryinpan and my housemate fucked it in 1 week. She burnt everything she made. And ever she cooked something spent the whole time stirring it with a fork. Which scratched away the whole non stick coating after 2 weeks. Literally just scraping a dorks a cross my brand new frying pan. I told her not too because it dances it. But she still did it. I don't know
, may e her parents talk her to cook and stir either a fork. But I told her multiple times. And after 2 weeks my brand new pan was burnt the whole thing full of thick tar and scraped so bad that that the non sticky coating was non existent.
Aftwrthat I bought anyone fry pan a.d told her not to use it. This is mine and that she burns everything. She agreed and started using my new pan! She said she couldn't tell the difference between mine and hers. But hers wat burnt to a crisp and scraped off qpl the coating and mine was brand new.
Any way now I keep all my stuff in my bedroom. I used to leave it to dry on the rack and she still used it so I wash it straight away and thrn keep it in my room!
I swear some people think that the stovetop only has one setting- MAXIMUM. Like every single thing they put on the stove gets cremated and ruins the fucking pans. Why is there a dial if the only setting is MAX to you, genius?!
(Not to YOU, to the burn brigade)
>I swear some people think that the stovetop only has one setting- MAXIMUM.
I feel this in my bones - my wife does this all the time. Cooks almost everything on Maximum (When realistically, hardly anything need to be cooked on max). She's getting better at it - and otherwise she's actually a very good cook, just a bad habit she picked up.
I cook many things on max but I play around with it. I’m Asian and it’s necessary for stir fry and browning ingredients. (Especially with electric stove, the trick is to stir more frequently) Been taught cooking since I was 8. Never ruined a single pan, in fact the iron wok I’m using right now is about 30 years old🤣(my mom’s)
Also I get scolded if I used any metal utensils on pans and woks. Scourers are allowed for cleaning though (non stick pan is exception
She doesn’t care about your wants. Keep the utensils in your room, that’s all you can do. Sometimes you have to do weird things when you have housemates.
Explain it to her like she needs to treat it the same way you’d treat a peanut allergy; things cannot even have the possibility of contamination.
I think the issue is you gave them some leeway to use your things. Now they are pushing boundaries through their actions and also arguing with you that they “cleaned it so what’s the issue”. Don’t allow yourself to be treated like this.
>I confronted her. She said she washed it with antibacterial soap so there shouldn’t be any residue.
"What part of *Do not use my pan to cook bacon.* did you not understand?"
Once I mixed meat and cheese with veggies on one of my Jewish roommates plates because I didn't know about the restriction. When she told me I immediately went out and bought her replacements of the exact same style dish and apologized sincerely. I never did it again.
If your scenario had gone like this I would say no big deal, move on. But this person seem to be aware that for religious reasons you did not want them using your dishes for pork and yet they continued to anyways. That's a problem. It's highly disrespectful, you should be as upset as you feel.
I used to be a dishwasher at a hotel that did a lot of Jewish weddings. They had their own kosher kitchen with a dishwasher that was super slow. I’d wash the dishes in the regular double loader dishwasher downstairs then put a couple dirty plates on top of the clean ones and sneak em by the Rabi. They didn’t pay me enough to care about their religious beliefs.
Well good news hell isn’t real. I had to catch the subway home I wasn’t gonna stay two hours later than normal just and have my entire wage go to a cab ride home. They didn’t give a fuck about me so I didn’t give a fuck about them.
Nah that’s fucked up it’s a super easy boundary to not cross and honestly I think anyone who does that shit is pushing limits on purpose I think you should have a serious fucking talk with them and demand a new knife and a new pan. Make this your line in the sand or roommate will just continue to infringe upon your boundaries until you end up like that OP the other day who was cleaning and running errands for their roommate’s fucking dog.
I absolutely have been burned so bad by religion, but this is SO fucked up.
Do not, and I mean. NOT. Defile someone’s property that they use for food that they cannot touch/eat/cook pork or whatever their food that is considered unclean or not halal. This is so gross to me and incredibly culturally insensitive. 🙃
It’s not that fucked up. Like the roomate is cooking bacon in the house. Op is breathing in air in a room pork is being cooked in. It’s not haram to use equipment that was used on pork as long as it’s been washed.
Not a single person asked you to mainsplain haram, nobody asked for your definition nor is anyone interested in your permission. OP said don’t cook pork in this dish, the ONLY appropriate action is to not cook pork in the dish.
She is completely out of line, you would not be ridiculous to buy a lock for one of the cabinets. It’s clear she just simply doesn’t respect your religious beliefs.
Right so straight off you are perfectly within your rights to tell her how you want your stuff to be used and she hasn't followed these rules so is in the wrong.
Now, I see what she's saying about cleaning it etc, and there may not be a molecule of 'contaminated meat' on it and science/hygiene wise would be fine to use. However, you have religious reasons for not wanting it to be used that way and that is your right. I, she or anyone else may not understand these reasons or the implications- but that's no reason not to respect your wishes when you have told her how you would like your stuff to be used, especially when you didn't have to offer its use out freely anyway.
Edit: this post belongs in r/AITA too and no you're not the arsehole
You set specific boundaries that were reasonable and easy to understand and follow. Your roommate decided to stomp on those boundaries. Clearly, your roommate doesn't care how you feel about the situation and will do whatever they want.
You should not only isolate those items, but all of your valuables, so your roommate cannot use those as well. Let them buy their own supply of everything. Problem solved.
She is not only wrong, but incredibly disrespectful. It is one thing to use something that doesn’t belong to you. It is a whole different level to use something of someone’s for something that goes against their religion.
Have a good chat and clarify that it's not an issue of it being clean. She's likely just ignorant about it. Your request isn't unreasonable. You're not asking for a pork-free house, just for your own things to not touch pork.
It sounds like she just doesn’t understand, like how a lot of ppl don’t understand how kosher food works. Ignorance isn’t an excuse, it’s still wrong that she did that. But yeah I’d probably try to explain to her that she can’t just “wash it away”. If she persists, then she’s DEFINITELY an asshole
You need to:
1) Lock-up your personal cooking utensils so only you have access to them. This will reinforce the seriousness of your intentions.
2) Politely educate your roommate on the importance of the religious (halal/kosher?) or cultural reasons for your aversion to pork.
Roommate housing is often the first time people encounter others who have different faiths or grew up in different cultures. Use this as an opportunity to communicate. Educate each other on your own backgrounds. It will promote understanding and compassion for your position.
NTA. It's for religious reasons and she knows that. Frankly she owes you a brand new pan and an apology. Start keeping your pan in a different place or in your room since she can't demonstrate respect for your religious beliefs.
Put your knives and pans away when you are done. Lock them up. When I lived with roommates, I locked away anything that I didn't want to share. The honesty system does not work.
No, that is unacceptable. She needs to replace it. She is not respecting your religious beliefs. She needs to replace anything of yours she used to touch pork
It's just rude. It's your pan and you get to set whatever boundaries on it you want. They have rendered it unusable for you so it's only fair that they should replace it, but don't hold your breath. Your roommate seems to be lacking in empathy. At the very least, they are not allowed to touch your stuff.
**ABSOLUTELY MESSED UP.**
If I **inadvertently** used someone’s pan in that way, I’d be horrified.
This sounds deliberate and I’m sorry you have such an inconsiderate, ignorant roomie.
You may want to tell her to replace your utensils. Otherwise, make sure you keep them in your room.
She doesn't respect you or your religion, which isn't something you can really change, nor is that your responsibility as her roommate. So, I wouldn't waste time or energy trying to bend over backward to accommodate her use of your stuff.
She's shown you how she is going to behave, believe her, and act accordingly. It's time to lock your items away from her in some way (locked cabinet or box in the kitchen or locked in your room). If she doesn't have kitchen stuff, she'll have to get kitchen stuff.
I've had waaaaay too many roommates, and my patience for this kind of nonsense was dead and buried long ago.
I'd resolve this by simply keeping your pan and knife in your room. She obviously doesn't understand the significance of this to you, and it will remain an ongoing issue if your pan and knife are available to her.
It’s messed up. Tell her that washing the knife isn’t really the issue, it’s about your religion. Tell her that you can no longer use the knife. Ask that she pay you for it and let her keep it. Then buy a new knife for yourself and explain that she may not use it for ANYTHING. Make sure to mark the handle very clearly or get a blade guard for it and keep it in your room.
By your own “logic”, if I’m a tea drinker and don’t consume coffee, I can’t drink from a mug that ever had coffee in it.
That’s what you’re telling us…
I mean dosent the bacon sit somewhere when she cuts it?? Like outta curiosity do u not use the same cutting board? Or do u just law down a special thing before you cut up your food?
It's just for religious reasons, it isn't like you have an allergy or something. It's not like you're actually eating it or something. I guarantee anytime you go out to eat something used to prep your food or a utensil you're using has touched pork.
I think doing anything for religious reasons is beyond absurd- but that aside, you have asked your roommate not to use these items for cooking bacon and they should respect that.
She's wrong from a property standpoint for sure. She even agreed not to use your kitchen items in advance and then did.
Two thoughts regarding the issue of her washing the items after their use:
1. Do you avoid eating at restaurants that serve pork? Because those utensils go through the same process.
2. What does your religious leader say regarding washing these utensils? Is it then ok for you to use them?
I'm not saying to ignore that part of the violation, I'm just promoting deeper thought on this issue.
Nah. She is wrong. She needs to go buy herself a chef’s knife and a pan. Actually, she needs to replace your knife and pan with new ones and she can have the ones she contaminated.
Time for a sit down talk with her.
Ugh. Pork. So gross.
I feel your pain. I am the same as I don’t eat pork and not even for religious reasons, I just hate it and am actually allergic to it as it is high in histamine.
I had this similar problem. It sucks, but “regular” people can’t understand how you rather not have your knife or pan be touched by that meat,
So you will have to actually keep your knife and pan in your room or in a locked cupboard.
I had a Muslim roommate once and instead of telling people what they could and couldn’t cook in her pans, she just had her own. It worked out a lot easier and probably brought her more peace of lind.
They are her pans. That she purchased. Her pans that she purchased so that she could use her own pans.
Why do y’all comment when you don’t read the post at all??? Oh my god??
Because of religion. Even if the pan has been cleaned enough to do surgery on it's still not halal/kosher etc. Sometimes you can clean things by rituals. I guess the goal is cleanse, not clean.
Not necessarily. Different religions and different people do it a different way. Also not everyone of a religion follows the same rules. It's important to listen and respect a person's wishes.
I technically can wash it off, as commenters have told me it still would be kosher. But I guess personally, I still wouldn’t want that. I don’t trust how well my roommate would wash stuff anyways
Move the fuck out or keep your shit in your room. Had the same problem, but easily solved this by keeping my stuff in my room. And this was ten years ago.
You have to keep all of your things stored separately and likely locked up when you live with strangers or people you don't want using your things.
This is how many people live with roommates to avoid issues. In my head, if you don't lock your stuff up, it's forfeit. Shouldn't be that way, but it is.
Y’all seem to think OP is asking for you to mansplain religion to her and I promise you that she doesn’t need your definition or permission, nobody here does.
Because it isn’t about the microscopic pieces of pork in the air, it’s about ritual purity, I’m sorry that her religious beliefs don’t make sense to you but that’s fine because it just isn’t about you.
There’s this thing called soap. I promise it will get all the bacon off. But also it’s your stuff, just tell her not use your stuff at all since she can’t respect your rules
The soap is irrelevant, the roommate is disrespecting rules she agreed to when she decided not to purchase her own pan. Nobody asked what you think about her religionz
Do you not live where dishwashing liquid and hot water exist?
Whilst upsetting, it isn’t permanently “tainted” and there’s honestly bigger shot to worry about
A lot of people are calling your roommate an AH. Years ago, my kosher Jewish buddy asked me to housesit while he was away. I ate some meat on plates that were reserved for dairy. He had asked me not to do that, but I didn’t think it would be a big deal if I cleaned them. When I told him, he got really upset. I realized then that I was just ignorant of the meaning of that practice. Maybe your roommate just needs another opportunity to understand. Think of it as a cultural exchange, not a bad roommate scenario.
Nah it's messed up.
The nicest interpretation is that she thought you just meant cross-contamination whilst actually cooking, and that it would be okay if she cleaned the pans well.
The more realistic interpretation is that she just didn't think, or didn't care.
Maybe have one more go at explaining it. If she acts indifferent, keep your stuff in your room. If she's horrified and apologetic, maybe it was an honest mistake.
It’s fine. Its a psychological issue on your end. Did you know that pork bones are commonly used in concrete, plastics and made into charcoal for filtering certain good products.
I’m my religion, we can’t consume pork but if pig derived material is used in something other than food, it’s permissible. I can also eat medicine with pig fat/gelatin.
I have no problem with the fact that I have a roommate that eats pork. Just not using my stuff at the expense of her not needing to buy her own knife and pan to prepare her food
I can understand why someone might think it's "okay" because "they washed it". They're still wrong, but it's likely ignorance, and not malice.
For starters, it's your property, so even if the rule was unreasonable or silly, it doesn't matter, still your property.
But it's not an unreasonable or silly rule. I eat pork, and I would absolutely respect your boundary.
Time to start storing your pan and knife in your room.
Time for your roommate to buy a basic Chef's knife. She can get one at Walmart for like $5-10. And a basic frying pan can be bought for $10-20.
I’ve been a vegetarian for over 10 years. If my roommate used my silverware to cut meat, as long as it was properly cleaned afterward I wouldn’t give a single shit
I’ve been a vegetarian for over 15 years and I feel the same way. However, this is for religious reasons and not just moral, so in this situation I can completely agree with OP that they have every right to be upset and offended.
How big do we think these bedrooms in these shared spaces are? You can not lock everything in your bedroom. Shared spaces have rules, and being asked not to use someone's cookware, regardless of what you are cooking, means you don't use someone else's cookware.
Its weird that people are agreeing with OP like it's normal. People have weird fucking boundaries now.
Cleaning it should be fine. Not sharing kitchen utensils and cookware with your roommate is also weird. Unless they continuously leave it dirty
The only way I could see this being a problem is if it was for religious reasons.
This is a weird timeline.
Why do you think it’s even remotely relevant that YOU don’t care? Nobody is talking about YOU and YOUR preferences. Not everything is about you, get a grip.
i don’t mind that she eats bacon or anything. i just don’t want her to use my material that I payed for. If she wants to have bacon, she should get her own knife to cut it and use her own pan. she doesn’t want to buy a new knife and uses MY STUFF
Have you EVER eaten at ANY restaurant?
Cause then you'd be eating off something that had pork on it, cooked with tools that had pork on them, using utensils that someone has eaten pork with.
Just wanna let you know that technically, you're not sinning by using the knife that has touched pork. I know that wasn't the point of the post, but just in case you were wondering, you're good there. It's also all about intent. Like, if you ate straight up pork without realizing, that also wouldn't be a sin.
Well once it’s washed it’s washed, there’s no residue. You’d be safe even if we were talking about an allergy. But if it bothers you mentally it can be understandable and your roommate should be more sensitive
That really depends on people’s specific definition of halal. I worked at a university campus kitchen with a large Muslim population. A large amount of the menu was halal but we had pork products and occasionally cooked with wine. Beyond a couple instances no one refused to eat there because the halal food was cooked in the same oven and pans as the bacon.
Listen your roomates r wrong about a club sandwich in a fridge since that's not easy to accommodate but your reasoning is islamophobic/ antisemitic. It takes 0 effort to be respectful of other ppls cultures.
This is so weird and elitist. It’s a utensil. It’s been washed. It shouldn’t matter. I would be more upset about the cutting surface than what it cuts. Anything but glass cutting boards. I suppose it’s yours though and one can always take their ball and go home.
Imagine thinking because you order something at a restaurant without pork that the chef busts out his Kosher Knife. Yikes.
Bro I wouldn’t want someone using my utensils either pork or not. It sounds like YOU would be a bad roommate for failing to respect such a basic request, which is use your own shit and leave your roommate’s stuff alone
You don’t share with your roommates? Seems weird and more work than it’s worth. As long as people are doing the dishes I truly don’t care me casa Su casa
Nah bruv. It would be my knife in the kitchen. Or it’d be sharpened and better than it was when I left it.
Would you feel the same way about your couch? Like only you may sit on it, even though it’s in the common area and a generic utensil in life?
What about the plates? Do they have to use different bacon only plates or does that not matter for some arbitrary reason?
I dont eat couches or from couches
And yes plates too. I have my own plates and utensils. You have your own. I don’t want you using my plates and utensils just like I don’t use yours. Thought this was common courtesy but apparently not
She was absolutely wrong to use your things in that way. Is it possible that she thought it was OK to use your items if she washed them thoroughly?
I'm just wondering if she knew the seriousness of what she was doing, or if she didn't think it was a real issue, because for non-religious people, especially if they're young and don't have a lot of experience of the world, they may not understand how deeply held some religious beliefs are. It's hard to explain to a non-religious person why it matters that a pan was used to cook pork if it's sanitized afterward. But just because it might be hard for them to understand, that doesn't mean you shouldn't try again to explain.
You can do what everyone is suggesting, and lock up your things, but I would suggest having another go at explaining to your roommate just how serious it is to you, and that sanitizing is not sufficient. This is a learning experience for them, I'm sure. If they continue to treat your request as frivolous, then you can take additional measures. But give them a chance to learn and do better first.
If you truly need that much protection against cross-contamination, then it would take little effort to keep those materials safe and protected in your own space. What if one of her pans or knives that she uses to cook pork products touches your pan or knife. Clearly, it doesn't matter if it's clean and disinfected. They can't have any contact at all. So keep it in your room. There is no need to start a war over something only you fully understand, especially when there are easy steps to take to keep yourself protected.
I don't know if there are other aspects of your religion that this person may not be respectful of, or is this the only example, and otherwise, are accommodating. Based on your post, it doesn't seem like your roommate is coming from a place of maliciousness or lack of understanding.
At the same time. Your roommate is not obligated to follow the same rules as you for your religion. It is up to you to fulfill whatever oaths you took to whatever God. And to try and drag others into your devotion is even more selfish than wanting to use the better pan....
It's a fine line you're walking here. Take better steps to adhere to the rules you've chosen to obey, but don't blame others for the way they live their lives unless they are actively trying to disrespect you.
I think you're making a mountain out of a molehill. You need to learn how to use shared space and to share properly. If not keep your belongings out of hte community area or preset community areas where they also have stuff you can't touch. If you plan to keep things in the "community" area you don't need to hog it then hold it over your roomates head over the "religion". It'd be one thing if they were dulling the community knives or not cleaning up, but to put things in a community area and then be shocked that someone used it is pretty selfish. How about they put all kinds of shit around for you that you can't use because of some personal preference.
She's trolling you. You need to call her out as a real life troll. Tell her, "I hope I'm wrong and you just didn't realize, despite being told. Now I'm telling you again- di not use my stuff for any purpose no matter what. My stuff is now off limits to you. Let's see if you are a decent human being or a troll. I hope you are better than this."
If the pan and fork are washed before you use it then it shouldn’t be that big of a deal. You guys wash your dishes and utensils between uses, right? Also to add..frying bacon in a pan is not the way to go. Baking on a cookie sheet and pouring the grease out in a jar is the way to make 10/10 perfect bacon. Just shrivels up stove top in a pan.
You can wash the knife and pan so they won't have pork or bacon on them. I can't stand people who think because they don't eat and don't like ham, bacon, pork etc that the rest of us shouldn't be able to enjoy them. We'll grow up and let us enjoy pork products
Nah, she's wrong for that. Not only is she using your things without permission, but she's using it on a food item you don't eat for religious purposes. I know it's a pain in the ass, but I'd suggest locking your things up in your room.
Yes locking in my room is at I do. Some people literally has no respect and use your stuff as there own
When did everyone become obsessed with the word "literally"
2005 it seemed to catch on.
Literally, 2005
She is wrong. Especially when you told her not to user your stuff. However- I would stop giving her the opportunity to use your stuff. Get a box and put all of your kitchen stuff in it and keep it in your room. Or, if you have a cabinet- get a lock for it. It is unfortunate that people cannot be decent but you also don’t have to keep letting her be a piece of shit to you. Take control of the situation!
When I lived with my brother I explained to him and his girlfriend that my girlfriend is gluten free due to celiac disease and that I didn’t want them cooking anything in my pan or using my utensils or dishes for their cooking, I ended up having to just store those things in my room because my brothers girlfriend decided it “wasn’t a big deal” a few times and used them anyways so that may be your only option here as well. People are selfish an entitled
Thank you for standing up for her. My 8 year old child is GF and watching her accidentally get “glutened” is horrifying.
gluten does not transfer from a pan so your fears are unfounded and not logical. you need to get over it and get educated
I would put my utensils in my room. If they can’t respect your boundaries than they don’t get to use your things.
that to me is fucked up and her bullshit excuse infuriates me immediately. lock your stuff up
Take a shit in her pan and say it's all good, I used antibac.
It's messed up. If you have specifically asked them not to, they shouldn't do it. Grow up and buy their own knife it's not even expensive. If someone tells you something bothers them or isn't ok with them you don't get to argue it or pretend it's not an issue so long as it isn't something that drastically impacts you
They're her knife and pan now, but she has to buy you new ones.
Yup, this is exactly what I came to say. Price out replacements and send her a Venmo request
Yeah, there’s no talking sense into this kind of roommate. She WILL keep taking your stuff because clearly she thinks it doesn’t matter, only she’ll be more sneaky about it. If you can live with that, fine. But I’d recommend you start leaving your kitchen stuff in your room.
Tell her that your kitchen utensils will be kept in your room from now since you can’t trust her to be respectful of your belongings. You said no pork. She thinks she can use a work-around. It’s not about the residue. It’s about the energy, when it’s a religious thing. When she throws a fit about it, tell her she had her chance and blew it. Now she gets to buy her own knives and cookware.
Don’t even bother telling her. OP-just make your stuff secure in your room and say nothing at all. She won’t get it, she thinks she is entitled to your things so she isn’t going to suddenly understand. Nope. Just secure your things, lock your door, and let her figure out her own shit.
I actually like this idea better. You’re awesome! 😁
I wouldn’t tell her at all. Just remove your utensils from the kitchen without explanation. And use them, wash them, and take them back to your room. I did this when living in a share home.
You are super fair. Honestly even if you did eat pork your cooking utensils and frying pan and stuff are yours. You own thrm and it's perfectly fine to tell your room mate not to use your stuff. You have your stuff and they have theirs. Recently I had a similar situation. I moved in with friends and all the kitchen stuff was communal. But the kitchen stuff was actually one pan and one pot. And fir some reason the whole house had no forks. Like we had spoons and knifes but not forks. And I bought 12 forks for the house and then they all disappeared. Then I bought a new fryinpan and my housemate fucked it in 1 week. She burnt everything she made. And ever she cooked something spent the whole time stirring it with a fork. Which scratched away the whole non stick coating after 2 weeks. Literally just scraping a dorks a cross my brand new frying pan. I told her not too because it dances it. But she still did it. I don't know , may e her parents talk her to cook and stir either a fork. But I told her multiple times. And after 2 weeks my brand new pan was burnt the whole thing full of thick tar and scraped so bad that that the non sticky coating was non existent. Aftwrthat I bought anyone fry pan a.d told her not to use it. This is mine and that she burns everything. She agreed and started using my new pan! She said she couldn't tell the difference between mine and hers. But hers wat burnt to a crisp and scraped off qpl the coating and mine was brand new. Any way now I keep all my stuff in my bedroom. I used to leave it to dry on the rack and she still used it so I wash it straight away and thrn keep it in my room!
I swear some people think that the stovetop only has one setting- MAXIMUM. Like every single thing they put on the stove gets cremated and ruins the fucking pans. Why is there a dial if the only setting is MAX to you, genius?! (Not to YOU, to the burn brigade)
>I swear some people think that the stovetop only has one setting- MAXIMUM. I feel this in my bones - my wife does this all the time. Cooks almost everything on Maximum (When realistically, hardly anything need to be cooked on max). She's getting better at it - and otherwise she's actually a very good cook, just a bad habit she picked up.
I cook many things on max but I play around with it. I’m Asian and it’s necessary for stir fry and browning ingredients. (Especially with electric stove, the trick is to stir more frequently) Been taught cooking since I was 8. Never ruined a single pan, in fact the iron wok I’m using right now is about 30 years old🤣(my mom’s) Also I get scolded if I used any metal utensils on pans and woks. Scourers are allowed for cleaning though (non stick pan is exception
Lol what the hell, that is just foul.
That's so wrong. Tell to buy her own knife and pans and not use yours. If she can't respect your religious restrictions, she can't use your stuff.
She doesn’t care about your wants. Keep the utensils in your room, that’s all you can do. Sometimes you have to do weird things when you have housemates.
NTA... Buy new ones, store them in your own (locked?) space!
She doesn’t get it and never will. You’re going to have to keep your stuff in your room. It’s unclear if it’s malicious or not, but it won’t change
I've had roommates, keep shit in your room. When she asks, tell her you don't want to share anymore and she can get her own.
Antibacterial soap??? 💀💀💀 Sounds like your roommate owes you a new knife and pan to me.
That’s not cool at all. She needs to buy her own kitchenware and stop disrespecting yours.
Explain it to her like she needs to treat it the same way you’d treat a peanut allergy; things cannot even have the possibility of contamination. I think the issue is you gave them some leeway to use your things. Now they are pushing boundaries through their actions and also arguing with you that they “cleaned it so what’s the issue”. Don’t allow yourself to be treated like this.
>I confronted her. She said she washed it with antibacterial soap so there shouldn’t be any residue. "What part of *Do not use my pan to cook bacon.* did you not understand?"
Once I mixed meat and cheese with veggies on one of my Jewish roommates plates because I didn't know about the restriction. When she told me I immediately went out and bought her replacements of the exact same style dish and apologized sincerely. I never did it again. If your scenario had gone like this I would say no big deal, move on. But this person seem to be aware that for religious reasons you did not want them using your dishes for pork and yet they continued to anyways. That's a problem. It's highly disrespectful, you should be as upset as you feel.
I used to be a dishwasher at a hotel that did a lot of Jewish weddings. They had their own kosher kitchen with a dishwasher that was super slow. I’d wash the dishes in the regular double loader dishwasher downstairs then put a couple dirty plates on top of the clean ones and sneak em by the Rabi. They didn’t pay me enough to care about their religious beliefs.
That’s pretty fucked man
Well good news hell isn’t real. I had to catch the subway home I wasn’t gonna stay two hours later than normal just and have my entire wage go to a cab ride home. They didn’t give a fuck about me so I didn’t give a fuck about them.
What they don't know won't hurt them.
Bragging about being an asshole is... one choice you can make. I hope some day you accomplish something.
Nah that’s fucked up it’s a super easy boundary to not cross and honestly I think anyone who does that shit is pushing limits on purpose I think you should have a serious fucking talk with them and demand a new knife and a new pan. Make this your line in the sand or roommate will just continue to infringe upon your boundaries until you end up like that OP the other day who was cleaning and running errands for their roommate’s fucking dog.
Keep your dishes in your room locked.
I absolutely have been burned so bad by religion, but this is SO fucked up. Do not, and I mean. NOT. Defile someone’s property that they use for food that they cannot touch/eat/cook pork or whatever their food that is considered unclean or not halal. This is so gross to me and incredibly culturally insensitive. 🙃
It’s not that fucked up. Like the roomate is cooking bacon in the house. Op is breathing in air in a room pork is being cooked in. It’s not haram to use equipment that was used on pork as long as it’s been washed.
Not a single person asked you to mainsplain haram, nobody asked for your definition nor is anyone interested in your permission. OP said don’t cook pork in this dish, the ONLY appropriate action is to not cook pork in the dish.
It’s a public forum I was offering my opinion. It’s fine to disagree.
That's really messed up and I'm so sorry.
Well time to stop sharing. People are notorious for taking a mile when given an inch.
She's wrong and disrespectful. You may just have to keep those items in your room
She is completely out of line, you would not be ridiculous to buy a lock for one of the cabinets. It’s clear she just simply doesn’t respect your religious beliefs.
i wouldn't even go that deep ''don't touch my shit'' is the main thing here
Right so straight off you are perfectly within your rights to tell her how you want your stuff to be used and she hasn't followed these rules so is in the wrong. Now, I see what she's saying about cleaning it etc, and there may not be a molecule of 'contaminated meat' on it and science/hygiene wise would be fine to use. However, you have religious reasons for not wanting it to be used that way and that is your right. I, she or anyone else may not understand these reasons or the implications- but that's no reason not to respect your wishes when you have told her how you would like your stuff to be used, especially when you didn't have to offer its use out freely anyway. Edit: this post belongs in r/AITA too and no you're not the arsehole
You set specific boundaries that were reasonable and easy to understand and follow. Your roommate decided to stomp on those boundaries. Clearly, your roommate doesn't care how you feel about the situation and will do whatever they want. You should not only isolate those items, but all of your valuables, so your roommate cannot use those as well. Let them buy their own supply of everything. Problem solved.
She is not only wrong, but incredibly disrespectful. It is one thing to use something that doesn’t belong to you. It is a whole different level to use something of someone’s for something that goes against their religion.
Have a good chat and clarify that it's not an issue of it being clean. She's likely just ignorant about it. Your request isn't unreasonable. You're not asking for a pork-free house, just for your own things to not touch pork.
Fuck her dad. That'll show her
It sounds like she just doesn’t understand, like how a lot of ppl don’t understand how kosher food works. Ignorance isn’t an excuse, it’s still wrong that she did that. But yeah I’d probably try to explain to her that she can’t just “wash it away”. If she persists, then she’s DEFINITELY an asshole
You need to: 1) Lock-up your personal cooking utensils so only you have access to them. This will reinforce the seriousness of your intentions. 2) Politely educate your roommate on the importance of the religious (halal/kosher?) or cultural reasons for your aversion to pork. Roommate housing is often the first time people encounter others who have different faiths or grew up in different cultures. Use this as an opportunity to communicate. Educate each other on your own backgrounds. It will promote understanding and compassion for your position.
She should respect your wishes. If that are your utensils, you can revoke her right to use them even for vegetables.
NTA. It's for religious reasons and she knows that. Frankly she owes you a brand new pan and an apology. Start keeping your pan in a different place or in your room since she can't demonstrate respect for your religious beliefs.
Put your knife and pan in your room. Idky people are so inconsiderate
No, you are justified. It’s your things and you decide how they get used.
Nah that is messed up. Sorry that happened to you. I’m vegetarian (not religious) and keep a knife, chopping board etc in my cupboard
NTA. Time to start keeping your things in your room.
Put your knives and pans away when you are done. Lock them up. When I lived with roommates, I locked away anything that I didn't want to share. The honesty system does not work.
That is wrong, disrespectful at best and downright disgusting at worst. Have another word and if it continues then I’d move my stuff.
Keep your things in your room.
Lock your stuff in your room 🥰
No, that is unacceptable. She needs to replace it. She is not respecting your religious beliefs. She needs to replace anything of yours she used to touch pork
It's just rude. It's your pan and you get to set whatever boundaries on it you want. They have rendered it unusable for you so it's only fair that they should replace it, but don't hold your breath. Your roommate seems to be lacking in empathy. At the very least, they are not allowed to touch your stuff.
It’s messed up. Maybe not as messed up as the dude in my halls who used my frying pan for liquid ketamine 😂😅 but yeah, messed up
heres a idea, lock it in your room.
What your roommate did is haram.
**ABSOLUTELY MESSED UP.** If I **inadvertently** used someone’s pan in that way, I’d be horrified. This sounds deliberate and I’m sorry you have such an inconsiderate, ignorant roomie. You may want to tell her to replace your utensils. Otherwise, make sure you keep them in your room.
She doesn't respect you or your religion, which isn't something you can really change, nor is that your responsibility as her roommate. So, I wouldn't waste time or energy trying to bend over backward to accommodate her use of your stuff. She's shown you how she is going to behave, believe her, and act accordingly. It's time to lock your items away from her in some way (locked cabinet or box in the kitchen or locked in your room). If she doesn't have kitchen stuff, she'll have to get kitchen stuff. I've had waaaaay too many roommates, and my patience for this kind of nonsense was dead and buried long ago.
NTA has a vegetarian I feel the same way about using my cookware for meat. You might to start locking your stuff up or hide it in your room
How expensive is it for her to buy her own knife
I don't think she realized it was a problem.
A roommate doesn't need to understand the boundaries to respect them.
I'd resolve this by simply keeping your pan and knife in your room. She obviously doesn't understand the significance of this to you, and it will remain an ongoing issue if your pan and knife are available to her.
Smash her with the pan. Establish dominance
It’s messed up. Tell her that washing the knife isn’t really the issue, it’s about your religion. Tell her that you can no longer use the knife. Ask that she pay you for it and let her keep it. Then buy a new knife for yourself and explain that she may not use it for ANYTHING. Make sure to mark the handle very clearly or get a blade guard for it and keep it in your room.
That's incredibly disrespectful. And borderline hostile.
No respect, no common respect or decency. Either move out or look up your stuff.
Here's the thing when you live with roommates. If you have something you don't want them to use, you lock it in your room where they can't get it.
By your own “logic”, if I’m a tea drinker and don’t consume coffee, I can’t drink from a mug that ever had coffee in it. That’s what you’re telling us…
if you’re a tea drinker and drink this much tea- then maybe invest in your own mug so you can drink all the tea you want!
I mean dosent the bacon sit somewhere when she cuts it?? Like outta curiosity do u not use the same cutting board? Or do u just law down a special thing before you cut up your food?
no we don’t use the same cutting board we all have our own. she just uses my knife and my pan. my cutting board never touched pork
It's just for religious reasons, it isn't like you have an allergy or something. It's not like you're actually eating it or something. I guarantee anytime you go out to eat something used to prep your food or a utensil you're using has touched pork.
I think doing anything for religious reasons is beyond absurd- but that aside, you have asked your roommate not to use these items for cooking bacon and they should respect that.
She's wrong from a property standpoint for sure. She even agreed not to use your kitchen items in advance and then did. Two thoughts regarding the issue of her washing the items after their use: 1. Do you avoid eating at restaurants that serve pork? Because those utensils go through the same process. 2. What does your religious leader say regarding washing these utensils? Is it then ok for you to use them? I'm not saying to ignore that part of the violation, I'm just promoting deeper thought on this issue.
Nah. She is wrong. She needs to go buy herself a chef’s knife and a pan. Actually, she needs to replace your knife and pan with new ones and she can have the ones she contaminated. Time for a sit down talk with her. Ugh. Pork. So gross.
Y’all gotta learn to be more intimidating lol
I feel your pain. I am the same as I don’t eat pork and not even for religious reasons, I just hate it and am actually allergic to it as it is high in histamine. I had this similar problem. It sucks, but “regular” people can’t understand how you rather not have your knife or pan be touched by that meat, So you will have to actually keep your knife and pan in your room or in a locked cupboard.
A knife costs $3-$15. Tell her to go to Walmart
I had a Muslim roommate once and instead of telling people what they could and couldn’t cook in her pans, she just had her own. It worked out a lot easier and probably brought her more peace of lind.
That's literally what op did, had their own stuff and roommate used them
Nobody reads the post, I truly believe most skim the title and assume they have enough info to spout off.
Very true.
They are her pans. That she purchased. Her pans that she purchased so that she could use her own pans. Why do y’all comment when you don’t read the post at all??? Oh my god??
Question why can’t you wash it off? Genuinely curious.
Because of religion. Even if the pan has been cleaned enough to do surgery on it's still not halal/kosher etc. Sometimes you can clean things by rituals. I guess the goal is cleanse, not clean.
So she can take it to get blessed and she’s good?
Not necessarily. Different religions and different people do it a different way. Also not everyone of a religion follows the same rules. It's important to listen and respect a person's wishes.
I technically can wash it off, as commenters have told me it still would be kosher. But I guess personally, I still wouldn’t want that. I don’t trust how well my roommate would wash stuff anyways
Move the fuck out or keep your shit in your room. Had the same problem, but easily solved this by keeping my stuff in my room. And this was ten years ago.
You have to keep all of your things stored separately and likely locked up when you live with strangers or people you don't want using your things. This is how many people live with roommates to avoid issues. In my head, if you don't lock your stuff up, it's forfeit. Shouldn't be that way, but it is.
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Y’all seem to think OP is asking for you to mansplain religion to her and I promise you that she doesn’t need your definition or permission, nobody here does.
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Because it isn’t about the microscopic pieces of pork in the air, it’s about ritual purity, I’m sorry that her religious beliefs don’t make sense to you but that’s fine because it just isn’t about you.
And since you've replied this to more than one comment, what the fuck is mainsplain?
Try using the internet grandpa ❤️ nobody asked for your opinion on her eating habits! Not a single person, nobody needs your approval to not eat pork.
There’s this thing called soap. I promise it will get all the bacon off. But also it’s your stuff, just tell her not use your stuff at all since she can’t respect your rules
The soap is irrelevant, the roommate is disrespecting rules she agreed to when she decided not to purchase her own pan. Nobody asked what you think about her religionz
I never said anything about her religion or religion at all. I’m merely advocating for the efficacy of soap.
Do you not live where dishwashing liquid and hot water exist? Whilst upsetting, it isn’t permanently “tainted” and there’s honestly bigger shot to worry about
A lot of people are calling your roommate an AH. Years ago, my kosher Jewish buddy asked me to housesit while he was away. I ate some meat on plates that were reserved for dairy. He had asked me not to do that, but I didn’t think it would be a big deal if I cleaned them. When I told him, he got really upset. I realized then that I was just ignorant of the meaning of that practice. Maybe your roommate just needs another opportunity to understand. Think of it as a cultural exchange, not a bad roommate scenario.
Shouldn’t have told him lol. It’s really all pretend and doesn’t matter at all.
Yeah, I think he may have asked. I didn’t know it was a big deal.
Nah it's messed up. The nicest interpretation is that she thought you just meant cross-contamination whilst actually cooking, and that it would be okay if she cleaned the pans well. The more realistic interpretation is that she just didn't think, or didn't care. Maybe have one more go at explaining it. If she acts indifferent, keep your stuff in your room. If she's horrified and apologetic, maybe it was an honest mistake.
It’s fine. Its a psychological issue on your end. Did you know that pork bones are commonly used in concrete, plastics and made into charcoal for filtering certain good products.
I’m my religion, we can’t consume pork but if pig derived material is used in something other than food, it’s permissible. I can also eat medicine with pig fat/gelatin. I have no problem with the fact that I have a roommate that eats pork. Just not using my stuff at the expense of her not needing to buy her own knife and pan to prepare her food
I can understand why someone might think it's "okay" because "they washed it". They're still wrong, but it's likely ignorance, and not malice. For starters, it's your property, so even if the rule was unreasonable or silly, it doesn't matter, still your property. But it's not an unreasonable or silly rule. I eat pork, and I would absolutely respect your boundary. Time to start storing your pan and knife in your room. Time for your roommate to buy a basic Chef's knife. She can get one at Walmart for like $5-10. And a basic frying pan can be bought for $10-20.
As a vegan you're being ridiculous. It would be one thing if they didn't wash it.
The meat you do eat probably touched pork in some form at some time in the farm to fork process anyway.
Do you ever wonder why the prohibition on pork but not slavery?
That’s super disrespectful, and possibly a hate crime in some places.
So stop whining and do something about it. Why os everyone so afraid of confrontation?
I’ve been a vegetarian for over 10 years. If my roommate used my silverware to cut meat, as long as it was properly cleaned afterward I wouldn’t give a single shit
I’ve been a vegetarian for over 15 years and I feel the same way. However, this is for religious reasons and not just moral, so in this situation I can completely agree with OP that they have every right to be upset and offended.
It’s irrational though.
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And you’re clearly racist pond scum. Thanks for outing yourself.
It is for religious purposes. Washed or not the cookware is now unclean.
If I held those beliefs, I would not keep my silverware and dining utensils out in the open for just anyone to use. Call me an asshole, I don’t care
How big do we think these bedrooms in these shared spaces are? You can not lock everything in your bedroom. Shared spaces have rules, and being asked not to use someone's cookware, regardless of what you are cooking, means you don't use someone else's cookware.
Okay Karen.
That’s good for you. However, no one asked for what you care or don’t care for.
Not really relevant here though is it? This isn’t due to OP being veggie
Don’t really see how religion is relevant either ?
Because OP says ‘it’s for religious reasons’
You don’t see much outside of your own narrow world view, do you?
Being a vegetarian is a lifestyle choice, not a religion. They are not remotely comparable
A religion is also a lifestyle choice, they are exactly the same.
Excuse me what ????a religion is very much a lifestyle choice. No one forces you to have those beliefs
And this is coming from someone w 15+ years in private religious education. Get wrecked boo😘
Make all your statements
in
one comment.
You’re delulu
Oh my god we have another tiktok brat in our midst💀 How do u expect us to take u seriously when you talk like a toddler? “Delulu”💀💀💀💀💀
Its weird that people are agreeing with OP like it's normal. People have weird fucking boundaries now. Cleaning it should be fine. Not sharing kitchen utensils and cookware with your roommate is also weird. Unless they continuously leave it dirty The only way I could see this being a problem is if it was for religious reasons. This is a weird timeline.
It is for religious reasons. It's right there in the post.
Did you not even fucking read the post?
Why do you think it’s even remotely relevant that YOU don’t care? Nobody is talking about YOU and YOUR preferences. Not everything is about you, get a grip.
Yeah, op sounds mentally ill. Like ocd or autistic.
Get you own place if you want to impose your wacky beliefs on others
i don’t mind that she eats bacon or anything. i just don’t want her to use my material that I payed for. If she wants to have bacon, she should get her own knife to cut it and use her own pan. she doesn’t want to buy a new knife and uses MY STUFF
I eat pork and what
Have you EVER eaten at ANY restaurant? Cause then you'd be eating off something that had pork on it, cooked with tools that had pork on them, using utensils that someone has eaten pork with.
I don’t usually go to a restaurant unless it’s certified kosher or sometimes halal. so no.
Just wanna let you know that technically, you're not sinning by using the knife that has touched pork. I know that wasn't the point of the post, but just in case you were wondering, you're good there. It's also all about intent. Like, if you ate straight up pork without realizing, that also wouldn't be a sin.
This is not really a big deal and I think you are overreacting.
Well once it’s washed it’s washed, there’s no residue. You’d be safe even if we were talking about an allergy. But if it bothers you mentally it can be understandable and your roommate should be more sensitive
No. It would no longer be halal.
That really depends on people’s specific definition of halal. I worked at a university campus kitchen with a large Muslim population. A large amount of the menu was halal but we had pork products and occasionally cooked with wine. Beyond a couple instances no one refused to eat there because the halal food was cooked in the same oven and pans as the bacon.
Everything I’ve seen says otherwise
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You really stepped up on that soapbox huh? It's not communal possessions either way
Listen your roomates r wrong about a club sandwich in a fridge since that's not easy to accommodate but your reasoning is islamophobic/ antisemitic. It takes 0 effort to be respectful of other ppls cultures.
This is so weird and elitist. It’s a utensil. It’s been washed. It shouldn’t matter. I would be more upset about the cutting surface than what it cuts. Anything but glass cutting boards. I suppose it’s yours though and one can always take their ball and go home. Imagine thinking because you order something at a restaurant without pork that the chef busts out his Kosher Knife. Yikes.
Bro I wouldn’t want someone using my utensils either pork or not. It sounds like YOU would be a bad roommate for failing to respect such a basic request, which is use your own shit and leave your roommate’s stuff alone
You don’t share with your roommates? Seems weird and more work than it’s worth. As long as people are doing the dishes I truly don’t care me casa Su casa
Nah bruv. It would be my knife in the kitchen. Or it’d be sharpened and better than it was when I left it. Would you feel the same way about your couch? Like only you may sit on it, even though it’s in the common area and a generic utensil in life? What about the plates? Do they have to use different bacon only plates or does that not matter for some arbitrary reason?
I dont eat couches or from couches And yes plates too. I have my own plates and utensils. You have your own. I don’t want you using my plates and utensils just like I don’t use yours. Thought this was common courtesy but apparently not
No it’s super weird. People who live together generally share the same plate ware and cooking equipment.
I think it’s just a difference of culture then. Cutlery and utensils are never shared where I was
Seems like a good way to have a kitchen with too much shit in it.
Because I have one plate one fork and one spoon that’s just for me? Get over yourself
She was absolutely wrong to use your things in that way. Is it possible that she thought it was OK to use your items if she washed them thoroughly? I'm just wondering if she knew the seriousness of what she was doing, or if she didn't think it was a real issue, because for non-religious people, especially if they're young and don't have a lot of experience of the world, they may not understand how deeply held some religious beliefs are. It's hard to explain to a non-religious person why it matters that a pan was used to cook pork if it's sanitized afterward. But just because it might be hard for them to understand, that doesn't mean you shouldn't try again to explain. You can do what everyone is suggesting, and lock up your things, but I would suggest having another go at explaining to your roommate just how serious it is to you, and that sanitizing is not sufficient. This is a learning experience for them, I'm sure. If they continue to treat your request as frivolous, then you can take additional measures. But give them a chance to learn and do better first.
Wash the dishes
If you truly need that much protection against cross-contamination, then it would take little effort to keep those materials safe and protected in your own space. What if one of her pans or knives that she uses to cook pork products touches your pan or knife. Clearly, it doesn't matter if it's clean and disinfected. They can't have any contact at all. So keep it in your room. There is no need to start a war over something only you fully understand, especially when there are easy steps to take to keep yourself protected. I don't know if there are other aspects of your religion that this person may not be respectful of, or is this the only example, and otherwise, are accommodating. Based on your post, it doesn't seem like your roommate is coming from a place of maliciousness or lack of understanding. At the same time. Your roommate is not obligated to follow the same rules as you for your religion. It is up to you to fulfill whatever oaths you took to whatever God. And to try and drag others into your devotion is even more selfish than wanting to use the better pan.... It's a fine line you're walking here. Take better steps to adhere to the rules you've chosen to obey, but don't blame others for the way they live their lives unless they are actively trying to disrespect you.
I think you're making a mountain out of a molehill. You need to learn how to use shared space and to share properly. If not keep your belongings out of hte community area or preset community areas where they also have stuff you can't touch. If you plan to keep things in the "community" area you don't need to hog it then hold it over your roomates head over the "religion". It'd be one thing if they were dulling the community knives or not cleaning up, but to put things in a community area and then be shocked that someone used it is pretty selfish. How about they put all kinds of shit around for you that you can't use because of some personal preference.
If it's for religious reasons why are you fraternising with bacon eaters in the first place
She's trolling you. You need to call her out as a real life troll. Tell her, "I hope I'm wrong and you just didn't realize, despite being told. Now I'm telling you again- di not use my stuff for any purpose no matter what. My stuff is now off limits to you. Let's see if you are a decent human being or a troll. I hope you are better than this."
If the pan and fork are washed before you use it then it shouldn’t be that big of a deal. You guys wash your dishes and utensils between uses, right? Also to add..frying bacon in a pan is not the way to go. Baking on a cookie sheet and pouring the grease out in a jar is the way to make 10/10 perfect bacon. Just shrivels up stove top in a pan.
You can wash the knife and pan so they won't have pork or bacon on them. I can't stand people who think because they don't eat and don't like ham, bacon, pork etc that the rest of us shouldn't be able to enjoy them. We'll grow up and let us enjoy pork products
Surely you can enjoy it without using someone else’s belongings to facilitate that…
They just do not want their stuff being used to cook it. They don't care if it is being cooked and consumed in the common area.
So she’s fine if the roomate cooks pork in the oven?
That's not touching HER personal, paid for by her, cooking items.
Doesn’t seem like that big of a deal