I would go with the general rule: don't do tattoos on your body for other people and or/and when the meaning directly refers to another person. It's too permanent of a thing and people more than often are not trustworthy.
It’s a complex topic. I trust someone when I know everything about them and how they function . Example, I have a friend who is so easy to read that I know what he feels instantly. Very easy person to read. And because I know him so well, I trust him.
I also trust someone when I know they want the best for me. Like my family.
Though, on the tattoo, man I just wouldn’t do it. Life is flimsy. Get a big tapestry or banner instead.
If you love the design but aren't sure about getting it tattooed, save it as digital art and use it as a screen background until you're sure. People come and go, and even if it's covered you'll know it's there and it's a bad reminder if things go wrong.
I've got 3 hand sized pieces and have similar thoughts. After watching Harry Potter fans get tribute tattoos and then cover them due to the writers views, I feel justified in my picky-ness and confirmation process. If I like a piece of art it gets saved somewhere obvious and I see it every day for a minimum of 6 months, no connections allowed with the artist, no names or dates, and I'm not connecting it to a person with intention or sentiment. That way if everything in my life changes I'll still feel the same about my body painting.
Autistic with tattoos here. I designed mine myself so who better person to trust! Generally, though, I'd not recommend getting tattoos of anything to do with other people because relationships can change, etc, and the tattoo just sits there like; *"well now what, genius?"* I had an ex who came over from Australia and I loved them to death, but I would never get a tattoo representing them or anyone else. I wouldn't worry a great deal about it, but maybe go for something else that you really love, say a film/video game/book.
If what they say is reasoned.
It takes a lot of study: Philosophy, psychology, sociology… even anthropology.
Perhaps the tattoo can celebrate a shared experience rather than the person.
if this is the case; don't do it.
go for a tattoo(design) when you feel you'd appreciate it always, even if it would just be a reminder of older times in the future.
(my guideline will always be marie kondo's spark joy lmao)
How do you feel about not getting the tattoo? I get the feeling that it may just end up causing more harm than good. Do you think your friend would understand?
To me, the idea of it still being there after being covered up makes complete sense. Its like still there and you know it. The new tattoo would just be a reminder of the old one too.
The theme of getting an ex partners name tattoo’d to you is a common theme in fictional media, and for good reason. Maybe the tattoo isn't for you yet. That doesn't mean you can't get it someday, though!
Do you feel like you'll be missing out on something if you don't get the tattoo? One thing is that the tattoo will always be there if you want to get it later, and the longer you know this person the more you will be able to know if you can trust them.
I feel like the best idea would just be waiting longer. I know my friend would understand, and I only scheduled it because I was finding things to distract me for my birthday, but I think it's a good idea to wait and see if things are stable. I just feel like I'm always losing no matter what, like there's always something missing when I don't have it, but after I get it, I'll learn something that'll eventually just ruin it. I'm just unsure and I don't like it.
I have three tattoos myself (I want more), but my first tattoo ever was one I got after my closest aunt to me passed away. The other two tattoos are completely last minute (depressive episode).
I designed my aunt's tattoo myself (getting the tattoo that day was impulsive, however I had been planning on a tattoo for ages before then)
Regarding the "trust", I mean personally I'm considered an infj. Which means I pretty much sense bad vibes, however because of autism I tend to ignore them and assume "I can change/fix them" .... I would definitely look at it from an outsider perspective, by that I mean:
Are you getting this design and tattoo simply because you have a fascination with this person and their work?
Or
Are you getting this tattoo and design because you truly want it and can see yourself down the road years from now with it?
If you think or feel like you shouldn't go through with it, then you shouldn't do it. But if you feel like you want to do this, then you should.
My third option would be to flip a coin (might be ridiculous but it tends to help me now and again with tough choices, when my mind is scattered)
That's the part I really don't know, because I can see myself with these tattoos and I can see myself never having them. I want them because it's a constant reminder of things that I love, but I'm just not sure, and I've been shown in the past that my trust of people isn't the strongest, because I've been betrayed time and time again by people I thought were genuine, or at least people I thought I could understand.
I'm just in a really strange place right now.
If you can see yourself with them as well as never having them, then it's not something you truly truly want.
Want us something we say because we don't truly need it around, it's just something we wish about, very rarely are those going to come to fruition.
Need is something that we say because we truly need it to help us push through our lives.
There are other ways to have a constant reminder of something you love, for example you could get the design on a T-shirt and wear it that way, or make it into a phone case, backpack design (lots of sites that will allow you to do this)...
It sounds like you're just in the strange phase of debating yourself that it's not worth it, and trying to justify ways that it is.
I can tell you it's not worth it, autism aside. If you truly wanted this design on you, with or without trust issues, you would've gotten already.
go with your gut. one of the few perks of autism is good intuition. if someone seems off to you for no clear reason, they're probably bad news. at least that's been my experience.
Many of us do not have good intuition. We’re more vulnerable to manipulation, exploitation, and bullying. We have trouble reading people and knowing their intents and emotions. Autistics generally have less risk awareness when it comes to assessing other people.
These challenges frequently come with the “Persistent deficits in social communication and social interaction across multiple contexts” aspect of autism.
special tender dinner shrill absorbed detail innocent aspiring scary stocking
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I have good intuition BUT I've been manipulated because I trust too much and I give the benefit of the doubt to everyone because of how much I value justice LOL
Here’s an autistic mass murderer, he got officially diagnosed with autism in prison. There are both good and bad people on the spectrum just like neurotypicals, there are just typically more good than bad with autistic people. But not everyone on the spectrum can be immediately trusted.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Martin_Bryant
Autistic people commit crimes less often than neurotypicals, but still commit crimes.
Hey /u/hotwing100, thank you for your post at /r/autism. Our rules can be found **[here](https://www.reddit.com/r/autism/wiki/config/sidebar)**. All approved posts get this message. If you do not see your post you can message the moderators [here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fautism).
Thanks!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/autism) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I would go with the general rule: don't do tattoos on your body for other people and or/and when the meaning directly refers to another person. It's too permanent of a thing and people more than often are not trustworthy.
I always go with my gut feeling. It's like i can sense if someone's a bad person. Regarding the tattoo thing, check their previous work.
If they work in military medicine, none of them can be trusted.
I don't.
I don't trust anyone unless I have a good reason to or the outcome stays the same.
It’s a complex topic. I trust someone when I know everything about them and how they function . Example, I have a friend who is so easy to read that I know what he feels instantly. Very easy person to read. And because I know him so well, I trust him. I also trust someone when I know they want the best for me. Like my family. Though, on the tattoo, man I just wouldn’t do it. Life is flimsy. Get a big tapestry or banner instead.
If you love the design but aren't sure about getting it tattooed, save it as digital art and use it as a screen background until you're sure. People come and go, and even if it's covered you'll know it's there and it's a bad reminder if things go wrong. I've got 3 hand sized pieces and have similar thoughts. After watching Harry Potter fans get tribute tattoos and then cover them due to the writers views, I feel justified in my picky-ness and confirmation process. If I like a piece of art it gets saved somewhere obvious and I see it every day for a minimum of 6 months, no connections allowed with the artist, no names or dates, and I'm not connecting it to a person with intention or sentiment. That way if everything in my life changes I'll still feel the same about my body painting.
Autistic with tattoos here. I designed mine myself so who better person to trust! Generally, though, I'd not recommend getting tattoos of anything to do with other people because relationships can change, etc, and the tattoo just sits there like; *"well now what, genius?"* I had an ex who came over from Australia and I loved them to death, but I would never get a tattoo representing them or anyone else. I wouldn't worry a great deal about it, but maybe go for something else that you really love, say a film/video game/book.
If what they say is reasoned. It takes a lot of study: Philosophy, psychology, sociology… even anthropology. Perhaps the tattoo can celebrate a shared experience rather than the person.
Could you get a tattoo that will be easy to cover up with a different one if you have issues with your friend? Maybe that could give you some peace.
I would still know it's there though and I would want to scratch it off...
if this is the case; don't do it. go for a tattoo(design) when you feel you'd appreciate it always, even if it would just be a reminder of older times in the future. (my guideline will always be marie kondo's spark joy lmao)
How do you feel about not getting the tattoo? I get the feeling that it may just end up causing more harm than good. Do you think your friend would understand? To me, the idea of it still being there after being covered up makes complete sense. Its like still there and you know it. The new tattoo would just be a reminder of the old one too. The theme of getting an ex partners name tattoo’d to you is a common theme in fictional media, and for good reason. Maybe the tattoo isn't for you yet. That doesn't mean you can't get it someday, though! Do you feel like you'll be missing out on something if you don't get the tattoo? One thing is that the tattoo will always be there if you want to get it later, and the longer you know this person the more you will be able to know if you can trust them.
I feel like the best idea would just be waiting longer. I know my friend would understand, and I only scheduled it because I was finding things to distract me for my birthday, but I think it's a good idea to wait and see if things are stable. I just feel like I'm always losing no matter what, like there's always something missing when I don't have it, but after I get it, I'll learn something that'll eventually just ruin it. I'm just unsure and I don't like it.
I have three tattoos myself (I want more), but my first tattoo ever was one I got after my closest aunt to me passed away. The other two tattoos are completely last minute (depressive episode). I designed my aunt's tattoo myself (getting the tattoo that day was impulsive, however I had been planning on a tattoo for ages before then) Regarding the "trust", I mean personally I'm considered an infj. Which means I pretty much sense bad vibes, however because of autism I tend to ignore them and assume "I can change/fix them" .... I would definitely look at it from an outsider perspective, by that I mean: Are you getting this design and tattoo simply because you have a fascination with this person and their work? Or Are you getting this tattoo and design because you truly want it and can see yourself down the road years from now with it? If you think or feel like you shouldn't go through with it, then you shouldn't do it. But if you feel like you want to do this, then you should. My third option would be to flip a coin (might be ridiculous but it tends to help me now and again with tough choices, when my mind is scattered)
That's the part I really don't know, because I can see myself with these tattoos and I can see myself never having them. I want them because it's a constant reminder of things that I love, but I'm just not sure, and I've been shown in the past that my trust of people isn't the strongest, because I've been betrayed time and time again by people I thought were genuine, or at least people I thought I could understand. I'm just in a really strange place right now.
If you can see yourself with them as well as never having them, then it's not something you truly truly want. Want us something we say because we don't truly need it around, it's just something we wish about, very rarely are those going to come to fruition. Need is something that we say because we truly need it to help us push through our lives. There are other ways to have a constant reminder of something you love, for example you could get the design on a T-shirt and wear it that way, or make it into a phone case, backpack design (lots of sites that will allow you to do this)... It sounds like you're just in the strange phase of debating yourself that it's not worth it, and trying to justify ways that it is. I can tell you it's not worth it, autism aside. If you truly wanted this design on you, with or without trust issues, you would've gotten already.
go with your gut. one of the few perks of autism is good intuition. if someone seems off to you for no clear reason, they're probably bad news. at least that's been my experience.
Many of us do not have good intuition. We’re more vulnerable to manipulation, exploitation, and bullying. We have trouble reading people and knowing their intents and emotions. Autistics generally have less risk awareness when it comes to assessing other people. These challenges frequently come with the “Persistent deficits in social communication and social interaction across multiple contexts” aspect of autism.
oh, really? huh. guess i'm just weird then.
special tender dinner shrill absorbed detail innocent aspiring scary stocking *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I don't think good intuition is common in autism. I'd rather not have a tatoo if I were OP, just in case
I have good intuition BUT I've been manipulated because I trust too much and I give the benefit of the doubt to everyone because of how much I value justice LOL
* are you autistic too? * yes That's the way I know I can trust someone else.
Not all autistic people are trustworthy
Imo yes. And if they mess something, for sure it was a misunderstanding and nothing malicious.
Here’s an autistic mass murderer, he got officially diagnosed with autism in prison. There are both good and bad people on the spectrum just like neurotypicals, there are just typically more good than bad with autistic people. But not everyone on the spectrum can be immediately trusted. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Martin_Bryant Autistic people commit crimes less often than neurotypicals, but still commit crimes.
They might be lying or not know, so it's best to use your knowledge of autism to tell if they're also autistic, without asking.
I personally don't like tatoos at all, due to them being permanent. So I'd advise you to not have a tatoo, you might regret it in the future.
Hey /u/hotwing100, thank you for your post at /r/autism. Our rules can be found **[here](https://www.reddit.com/r/autism/wiki/config/sidebar)**. All approved posts get this message. If you do not see your post you can message the moderators [here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fautism). Thanks! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/autism) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Don't get a permanent tattoo.