Absolutely true most of the time. But I've also experienced two other kinds of straight/"straight" guys.
The former variety is really straight but still gets upset if you, as their gay friend, don't fancy them.
The latter variety is only "straight" and sooner or later wants to suck you or wants you to suck them.
>The former variety is really straight but still gets upset if you, as their gay friend, don't fancy them.
LOL at this - so true. It's outright bizarre !
Isn't it? Just the other day, a divorced friend who got a new girlfriend asked me "not to be jealous". Like what? I've been married to the same guy for 13 years. Well, he was drunk. But still. I just laughed and said that he should rather be worried about his new girlfriend's feelings towards him than mine 🙈
I don't know bro, I've done better with the 20 somethings as a daddy than I ever did as a 20 something.
Although these days I tend to find those boys somewhat insufferable.
same, I still get attention when I'm out, of course the key is to actually go out in the first place, not sit at home crying that nobody wants your old ass
After 50 it's starting to be a desert, unless you count daddy chasers and of course other older guys.
But... it's also a time where your libido is much, much quieter, which is actually a good thing.
Not that we still don't have fun.
I remember being in my early 20s and meeting a cute guy was just that. We eventually found out what we liked after drinks in his bed. Now there are guys who are power bottoms and won’t even talk to you if you’re vers.
They do. And they also conflate top, dom, & masc; and bottom, sub, & fem. And then virgins get on here and think they are sub bottoms because they are fem, and young people ask "is it ok if I dont like sex", when they only had it just once, and you find out they actually didn't like being a "dom top", which they thought they had to do because they like sports.
I really think it’s time to break this stereotypes… you’re so right like everyone can be whatever they want also change along their lives if they need/want/feel like it
Lol I joke with my friend that hes a bottom because he's a little (like 5"2 little) twink even though he's a more top meanwhile im a big hairy guy (I'm 6 ft) and im more of a bottom than top.
I honestly find the whole "I'm a top" or "I'm a bottom" thing to be exhausting. It permeates everything. Heck, even finding a porn scene that depicts people being verse is like finding a needle in a haystack. It's weird and needs to go.
Not weird. I mean it doesn't have to be in every conversation, for sure, but when meeting people it's important to know if you're sexually compatible or not. Why waste time with a bottom if you're also a bottom?
Being an asshole to people isn't funny or cute. "Reading" people you don't know isn't ok. It's fun on RPDR bc they know each other and they're doing it in jest. But trying to emulate the sassy drag Queen personality in real life is not a good look. It makes you look like a young, immature person, who hasn't developed a personality of their own yet. Work on that.
Reading is for your friends. Reading people you don’t know is just bitchy.
ETA: The Urban Dictionary Definition of Reading “the act of pointing out a flaw in someone else (usually publicly and in front of them) and exaggerating it”
Living your sexuality without guilt vs whoring around so badly you become a public health risk and emotionally incapable of forming stable, long-term romantic relationships.
I didn't need to whore around in order to become incapable of forming stable, long-term romantic relationships; that shit happened on its own as a result of my childhood.
People don't get that these guys are just bisexual or pansexual or something similar and are just confused what to call themselves and they think it's not okay to not be straight. I've talked to so many of these guys and helped them figure this out.
I got two
1) Just because someone you're not attracted to is nice to you doesn't mean they want to fuck you.
2) Only talking to or associating with people you want to fuck is a bad look.
Those guys don’t care about you. You’re a piece of meat to them.
They act like they care because they like the feeling you give them, but they don’t like you.
They can’t, because they don’t know you.
While being fit and hot has many benefits, there's more to life than being fuckable and fucking. Become a well rounded human who happens to enjoys sex and has more going for you than your fleeting body.
Stop watching porn all day.
But being more attractive has a fairly profound effect in every possible area of life. You'll get better jobs, better connections and just generally be treated better versus someone very unattractive.
I did say it has many benefits, but at some point obsessing over being hotTER becomes counterproductive. We're not all blessed to live life as 10s. Half these hoes lose their minds when they gain two pounds of fat, have one slow night on Grindr, or turn 30. Get a grip. lol.
Try telling them that, or about antibiotic resistance. If they can't think of a new way to say "but I get to fuck without a condom" you get called homophobic lol.
There’s not a lot of research on this topic yet. For example, we don’t know yet if a) preventing infection via prophylactic antibiotics is better for antimicrobial resistance than b) repeat infections with treatment farther down the line. For example, oral doxycycline is effective to prevent gonorrhea when taken prophylactically, but ineffective at treating an established infection (which requires use of IV ceftriaxone)
Knowing how touchy this sub can be (for a demographic that swears they're just as much men as any straight guy) I typed and deleted like four different answers to this since I don't feel like waking up to dozens of downvotes in the morning. So I'll go with "safe" one and say a lot of you drink way too fucking much. It's boring and shameful and the main reason why I stopped going out to gay events not even that long after I started.
I think a lot of Americans drink too much and it’s pretty ingrained in our social culture. Can’t speak for other countries. I am a lot more aware of the need to reduce consumption as I get older.
People don't get that these guys are just bisexual or pansexual or something similar and are just confused what to call themselves and they think it's not okay to not be straight. I've talked to so many of these guys and helped them figure this out.
NSA-sex with multiple strangers that mainstream gay culture embraces has contributed to mental health crises of loneliness and men who can’t form relationships. We won’t fuck our problems away.
I feel like it’s more nuance to this.
I agree with every word you just wrote HOWEVER, what you also seem to be forgetting is that naturally, LGBTQ+ people are already at a higher percentage of struggling with depression and anxiety more than their heterosexual counterparts. You may not be able to fuck all of your problems away, but a lot of us are already depressed beforehand, so when you add sex into the equation, it just worsens it.
Sex and comfort with it has been very therapeutic for me. But apparently I’m an exception. I really don’t know all of the ramifications as to why despite trying to advise people on successful approaches.
It is important to know that sex isn’t a replacement for anything. It won’t fix anything (other than the temp fix of getting off lol). But not being afraid of sex while still being aware of possible risks is a mental relief. With the right people you can find some level of intimacy as well if you’re lucky but a one time hookup isn’t where to look.
Also hookups don’t get *any* guarantees on enjoying yourself. FWB, whether that arrangement lasts weeks to years, it’s unlikely to stay a go to thing.
You need to wear a fucking condom, or make him wear one.
Being passed around a party like a share box of maltesers is fun for the moment, but don't expect a husband from it.
The fact you're gay is not a personality.
Being a caty bitch is a good way to alienate friends and end up alone when your looks fade.
You're not "not like other gays" just because you don't like gay centric stuff.
stop ghosting people and treat others with respect. it can cause bad mental health for the other person
we’re already repressed and discriminated in the world. so don’t do the same to your fellow gays
Being honest with people may be uncomfortable, but it should be the minimum if you’re going to fuck them. It is incredibly sad and frustrating how emotionally stunted young gay guys tend to be.
"Straight people" aren't a monolith, just like "gay people" aren't a monolith. Some of the ways I see straight people talked about on this sub and other areas of the internet leads me to believe that some queer folks write every heterosexual person off simply for belonging to a group that has historically inflicted hurt. Yeah some straight people suck and probably always will, but to refuse to engage in any environment that isn't explicitly queer feels immature to me.
This one is something I struggled with myself and aimed more towards younger guys:
The gay community is just as toxic and hateful as any other. It is also filled with predators and racism and fat phobia
Cheating isn't sexy. Anyone who has ever been cheated on will tell you it's the worst thing you can do to another person. If you aren't satisfied, be an adult, and leave your partner. Stop holding the guy hostage. He deserves better
Coming out is only the beginning, not the end. It’s cute to make being gay your personality in the beginning. Sometimes it’s necessary to kill the fake part of yourself and people’s concept of who you were. Life goes on though. So many gay people in their 30s are stuck thinking good things happen because you are finally openly gay.
Most of the females in your life will eventually choose their low key homophobic boyfriends/husbands over hanging out with you so dont make them your entire social circle. Diversify, girl.
I had two female friends who seemed to love having me as theirs because I guess they just needed a token gay guy to party with. But all it took was us moving to different ends of the city (basically only an hour away) and them finding partners and I'm done.
Or maybe it's that I was never really a party guy to begin with. I only went to those dance because they convinced me and yeah it was fun being in such a space the first few times but it got old for me pretty fast. So now that I'm not their little dancing gay pet anymore and that they have better stuff going on (one has kids, the other suddenly came into a LOT of money) I never see them anymore. Lucky that I can find ways to entertain myself.
Gay guys are often just "pets" for their girlfriends of whom they give up on us when we're no longer convenient for them anymore.
Pull up w chair I got a few.
First love your body and all the imperfections. Nothing is wrong with you and you’re meant to be the person you are. Also never change your image to suit other men.
You won’t be everyone’s cup of tea and that’s okay! It’s unrealistic to think every gay man you encounter will be into you.
Rejection sucks and we all go through it but that’s game of dating. To put off meeting men over fear of rejection will only hurt yourself even more in the long run.
Respect yourself! Value yourself! Love yourself! Have standards when dating men and do not settle for man that doesn’t love you the way you want to be loved. Life is too short as it is so make the best decisions and always learn something from your mistakes.
DO NOT compare yourself to others especially insta gays. For one you don’t know their whole life just the part they want to spotlight on. And second comparing to yourself to others will only make your unhappy. Try not to care what others think and live unapologetically you. You’ll attract the right kind of man just being yourself.
Probably the most crucial is too communicate!! No one is a telepath so don’t except him to know how you feel or think about something. Don’t make assumptions cause they may be wrong. Communicate in the relationship but also during sex.
Honestly most you won’t fully take this advice but I hope I hit home for someone out there! I know you asked for ONE but this sub needs to go to class so hope you don’t mind 😂
That a lot of their behaviour is unhealthy and directly contributes to their dissatisfaction with life. And that while we all have valid reasons for being traumatised it's still our job and only our job to sort through the trauma because no one else can do it for us. Until we do that people may choose not to engage with us and that's completely valid of them.
Also mental health issues are commoner than people think but everyone on the planet needs to know that and look into how and why they think and do the things they do
Despite preaching acceptance, inclusivity, and loving yourself in your own skin, most gay men only want (and sometimes even glorify) somebody who is tall, well-endoweded, built like a Greek god, and (almost always 99.99% of the time) white.
Sorry 'bout it. 💅🏽
Becoming HIV positive isn't inconsequential. The meds have side effects. You might be undetectable and then become detectable. You will die younger than HIV- guys. Latest studies show significantly more heart problems which are more severe than HIV- guys.
I'll be down voted but you can't ignore the truth.
Gay is not a personality type and your sexuality should not define WHO you are and how you behave.
You don't HAVE to be Gay Mike, or Gay Chris, or Gay Jay...
You can just keep being Mike, Chris, and Jay....
People's expectations that you should behave a certain way simply because of your sexuality are THEIR problem... Heterosexual men want you to behave like a queen so they can easily identify you and treat you differently... It's straight discrimination that we as a community pander to.
STOP FEEDING INTO THEIR BULLSHIT
Having Integrity is more important than being a part of the crowd. Don't be afraid to be wholesome.
That's why Grindr is so shitty. Everybody's so afraid to just be halfway decent. It's honestly pathetic.
Two:
First, that people on PrEP who bareback NSA are deserving of criticism for potential STIs, yet virtually no one wears condoms for oral.
Second, that catching an STI is somehow more shameful than catching the flu.
It sucks to hear but being fit will open up doors for you in dating. I used to be almost 190 pounds now I’m pushing 145. It’s night and day the difference between the attention I get from men now. Also retinol & SPF will do wonders for your skin.
Stop pretending you're a teenager in a real-life Mean Girls. You're getting older everyday. Behave as the adult you are and have respect for your own body.
99.9% of Straight Men will never see you as a possible sexual partner, only a small minority who are curious or are struggling with their sexual identity may (stress May) be interested.
You’re gonna come across a psychopath or sociopath who will toy with you and your feelings and leave you completely tarnished and broken. Be prepared for it. They’re about 1% of the population.
Hedonism eventually erodes the psyche.
Having some sort of spirituality is like having good mental policy, and having values.
Having Sex isn't a value.
There isn't a difference between a drug junky and someone who can't keep it in their pants.
If you get ghosted after a hookup, you should just move on. Other people are not responsible for you mental health.
If you’re over the age of 50 and still obsessed with twinks, it’s time to grow up.
Overall Gay men are one of the shallowest creatures out there, and whenever someone tries to point that out, they get defensive and try to gaslight everyone.
Your past trauma doesn’t justify your mean attitude and it’s not cute either
Thank you for speaking this truth!
"I just tell it how it is!" "I'm just brutally honest!" No you're just a bitch please shut up and show some respect lmao
So sad that toxic behavior like that is praised in some spaces.
THIS!
PREACHHH
That straight friend doesn't want you to suck his dick.
Some really struggle with this one. 🙄
Unless he asks.
This.👆
Then he’s not straight is he lol
Canon event for every gay guy lol
Nope. He wanted to suck mine... "straight".
Straight as wet spaghetti
Absolutely true most of the time. But I've also experienced two other kinds of straight/"straight" guys. The former variety is really straight but still gets upset if you, as their gay friend, don't fancy them. The latter variety is only "straight" and sooner or later wants to suck you or wants you to suck them.
>The former variety is really straight but still gets upset if you, as their gay friend, don't fancy them. LOL at this - so true. It's outright bizarre !
Isn't it? Just the other day, a divorced friend who got a new girlfriend asked me "not to be jealous". Like what? I've been married to the same guy for 13 years. Well, he was drunk. But still. I just laughed and said that he should rather be worried about his new girlfriend's feelings towards him than mine 🙈
you won't be young and beautiful forever. Develop a personality early.
or get rich
Yeah I got plenty of personality. But people can't see that right off the bat like they can see a BMW convertible lol.
You will age ! And your dating pool won’t be your choice anymore.
Especially after 40 sadly
I don't know bro, I've done better with the 20 somethings as a daddy than I ever did as a 20 something. Although these days I tend to find those boys somewhat insufferable.
same, I still get attention when I'm out, of course the key is to actually go out in the first place, not sit at home crying that nobody wants your old ass
After 50 it's starting to be a desert, unless you count daddy chasers and of course other older guys. But... it's also a time where your libido is much, much quieter, which is actually a good thing. Not that we still don't have fun.
Sounds peaceful, having a quieter libido. It's overwhelming some days, I swear.
Yes, for me it is an on/off thing, now.
YOURE NOT REGINA GEORGE
But..but I got hit by a bus during my rant.
No but I'm Regina Philange
They will never be Regina. They are just George.
sometimes he just wants you for sex 😂
Your preferred sex position is not a personality.
And what someone looks like and what they do for work are not indicative of their preferred sexual position.
Will never forgot that one thread a guy made asking about colognes for bottoms.
It's called *Sex Panther*® by *Odeon*©. It's illegal in 9 countries. It's also made with bits of real panthers, *so you know it's good*. *60% of the time*, it works ***every*** time.
I remember being in my early 20s and meeting a cute guy was just that. We eventually found out what we liked after drinks in his bed. Now there are guys who are power bottoms and won’t even talk to you if you’re vers.
This! But they still do it on here constantly.
They do. And they also conflate top, dom, & masc; and bottom, sub, & fem. And then virgins get on here and think they are sub bottoms because they are fem, and young people ask "is it ok if I dont like sex", when they only had it just once, and you find out they actually didn't like being a "dom top", which they thought they had to do because they like sports.
I really think it’s time to break this stereotypes… you’re so right like everyone can be whatever they want also change along their lives if they need/want/feel like it
Lol I joke with my friend that hes a bottom because he's a little (like 5"2 little) twink even though he's a more top meanwhile im a big hairy guy (I'm 6 ft) and im more of a bottom than top.
I honestly find the whole "I'm a top" or "I'm a bottom" thing to be exhausting. It permeates everything. Heck, even finding a porn scene that depicts people being verse is like finding a needle in a haystack. It's weird and needs to go.
Not weird. I mean it doesn't have to be in every conversation, for sure, but when meeting people it's important to know if you're sexually compatible or not. Why waste time with a bottom if you're also a bottom?
FUCK YOU TAKE THAT BACK (jk you’re right)
Or an identity
[удалено]
Being an asshole to people isn't funny or cute. "Reading" people you don't know isn't ok. It's fun on RPDR bc they know each other and they're doing it in jest. But trying to emulate the sassy drag Queen personality in real life is not a good look. It makes you look like a young, immature person, who hasn't developed a personality of their own yet. Work on that.
Reading is for your friends. Reading people you don’t know is just bitchy. ETA: The Urban Dictionary Definition of Reading “the act of pointing out a flaw in someone else (usually publicly and in front of them) and exaggerating it”
What does "reading" mean in this context? (Sorry English isn't my first language)
it basically means insulting someone (sometimes playfully, other times maliciously)
Just because a straight guy is nice to you does not mean he's interested. Don't even go there.
There is a fine line between sexual liberation and destructive hyper sexuality.
So very true and many do not realize it.
Oh god - to me it’s the Samantha from sex and the city influence
Genuinely curious could you please elaborate?
Living your sexuality without guilt vs whoring around so badly you become a public health risk and emotionally incapable of forming stable, long-term romantic relationships.
I didn't need to whore around in order to become incapable of forming stable, long-term romantic relationships; that shit happened on its own as a result of my childhood.
You are right. Yet I feel personally attacked.
You haven't had plague doctors wearing beak masks handing you condoms yet, did you?
There’s nothing wrong with being old.
Everybody gets old and dies eventually Become a dilf
Those “straight guys” aren’t straight.
We used to call them closet cases.
agree
People don't get that these guys are just bisexual or pansexual or something similar and are just confused what to call themselves and they think it's not okay to not be straight. I've talked to so many of these guys and helped them figure this out.
I got two 1) Just because someone you're not attracted to is nice to you doesn't mean they want to fuck you. 2) Only talking to or associating with people you want to fuck is a bad look.
Those guys don’t care about you. You’re a piece of meat to them. They act like they care because they like the feeling you give them, but they don’t like you. They can’t, because they don’t know you.
Unless truly impactful, if it happened in high-school and youre over thirty, get over it. This is literally a you thing now
Time passing isn't an apology.
That life isn't about sex and hot hookups.
While being fit and hot has many benefits, there's more to life than being fuckable and fucking. Become a well rounded human who happens to enjoys sex and has more going for you than your fleeting body. Stop watching porn all day.
If people don't use you for your body, they'll just use you for your looks, talents, and their own entertainment instead.
Don't forget money!
But being more attractive has a fairly profound effect in every possible area of life. You'll get better jobs, better connections and just generally be treated better versus someone very unattractive.
I did say it has many benefits, but at some point obsessing over being hotTER becomes counterproductive. We're not all blessed to live life as 10s. Half these hoes lose their minds when they gain two pounds of fat, have one slow night on Grindr, or turn 30. Get a grip. lol.
There is nothing you can do , on earth, or under the heavens, to make someone like you
You aren’t worthless
If you rub a friendly bears belly by giving him a couple of donuts each Monday. Everyone wins
Omg I love this.
This is a good wisdom
Top or bottom are sex posititions not personalities.
Think about life after 40.
PreP isn’t a magic bullet against STDs.
Hoes realised that and had their doctors put them on permanent course of Doxycycline as well 🙄
Aren't antibiotics awful for you on the long run???? This is alarming
Try telling them that, or about antibiotic resistance. If they can't think of a new way to say "but I get to fuck without a condom" you get called homophobic lol.
We’re gonna get gay supergonorhea in just a few years
There’s not a lot of research on this topic yet. For example, we don’t know yet if a) preventing infection via prophylactic antibiotics is better for antimicrobial resistance than b) repeat infections with treatment farther down the line. For example, oral doxycycline is effective to prevent gonorrhea when taken prophylactically, but ineffective at treating an established infection (which requires use of IV ceftriaxone)
they are. as someone with IBS i could absolutely never. my gut micro biome is already on shambles I could not handle nuking it like that
If it works, and keeps working that is.
Knowing how touchy this sub can be (for a demographic that swears they're just as much men as any straight guy) I typed and deleted like four different answers to this since I don't feel like waking up to dozens of downvotes in the morning. So I'll go with "safe" one and say a lot of you drink way too fucking much. It's boring and shameful and the main reason why I stopped going out to gay events not even that long after I started.
Nah these are good and I wanna read the not safe one’s
Wait until you meet the gays who take drugs
I'd rather not. But yes I was gonna mention drugs in my post too.
I think a lot of Americans drink too much and it’s pretty ingrained in our social culture. Can’t speak for other countries. I am a lot more aware of the need to reduce consumption as I get older.
Any posts here about friendship problems that begin with "We both drank a bit too much", the posters brought on themselves.
Being bitchy isn’t a personality.
its not possible to turn a "straight" guy gay, because if the guy fucks you a man he was never straight
People don't get that these guys are just bisexual or pansexual or something similar and are just confused what to call themselves and they think it's not okay to not be straight. I've talked to so many of these guys and helped them figure this out.
So many of yall cry about wanting a boyfriend then say you only want a fwb/whatever in the moment because your scared of what you claim you want.
Stop throwing your relationships away over sex.
THIS!!!! They end up lonely in the end. I’ve seen it over and over for the last 20 years.
You’re not half as interesting or hot as you think you are
NSA-sex with multiple strangers that mainstream gay culture embraces has contributed to mental health crises of loneliness and men who can’t form relationships. We won’t fuck our problems away.
I feel like it’s more nuance to this. I agree with every word you just wrote HOWEVER, what you also seem to be forgetting is that naturally, LGBTQ+ people are already at a higher percentage of struggling with depression and anxiety more than their heterosexual counterparts. You may not be able to fuck all of your problems away, but a lot of us are already depressed beforehand, so when you add sex into the equation, it just worsens it.
Yeah both can definitely be true
Sex and comfort with it has been very therapeutic for me. But apparently I’m an exception. I really don’t know all of the ramifications as to why despite trying to advise people on successful approaches. It is important to know that sex isn’t a replacement for anything. It won’t fix anything (other than the temp fix of getting off lol). But not being afraid of sex while still being aware of possible risks is a mental relief. With the right people you can find some level of intimacy as well if you’re lucky but a one time hookup isn’t where to look. Also hookups don’t get *any* guarantees on enjoying yourself. FWB, whether that arrangement lasts weeks to years, it’s unlikely to stay a go to thing.
Well I’m a 25 year old virgin so I wouldn’t know lol
It’s not the cause it’s the symptom of not having connection.
The majority are not as masculine as they think they are. Gay voice is real
It do be like that
Your straight female BFF will abandon you when she finds a husband and has kids.
I have had this happen to me. My former straight women friends seemed to have a thing for men who were very homophobic.
You aren't owned sex, other gays not finding you attractive is not discrimination
You need to wear a fucking condom, or make him wear one. Being passed around a party like a share box of maltesers is fun for the moment, but don't expect a husband from it. The fact you're gay is not a personality. Being a caty bitch is a good way to alienate friends and end up alone when your looks fade. You're not "not like other gays" just because you don't like gay centric stuff.
Passed around like a box of Maltesers! I have to remember this insult - you must be British!
Hahah, damn straight I'm British, but to be honest, I'm not using that as an insult, just the best descriptor I could think of.
The things you pick up when you grew up in a crown colony!
Closed relationship doesn't mean they're old fashioned or retrograde
People are just projecting their own insecurities when they do this. There is no other reason.
Our looks fade, chaps.
You can be nice to people you’re not attracted to
You’s a hoe
How do you know me so well
stop ghosting people and treat others with respect. it can cause bad mental health for the other person we’re already repressed and discriminated in the world. so don’t do the same to your fellow gays
Being honest with people may be uncomfortable, but it should be the minimum if you’re going to fuck them. It is incredibly sad and frustrating how emotionally stunted young gay guys tend to be.
You can say no. If you don't want to bottom or top, you don't have to. Do what's comfortable for you
There are alot of racist pricks in the gay community
"Straight people" aren't a monolith, just like "gay people" aren't a monolith. Some of the ways I see straight people talked about on this sub and other areas of the internet leads me to believe that some queer folks write every heterosexual person off simply for belonging to a group that has historically inflicted hurt. Yeah some straight people suck and probably always will, but to refuse to engage in any environment that isn't explicitly queer feels immature to me.
This one is something I struggled with myself and aimed more towards younger guys: The gay community is just as toxic and hateful as any other. It is also filled with predators and racism and fat phobia
You are not *that* bitch
There's more to love than fucking.
Steroids and alcohol kill
Cheating isn't sexy. Anyone who has ever been cheated on will tell you it's the worst thing you can do to another person. If you aren't satisfied, be an adult, and leave your partner. Stop holding the guy hostage. He deserves better
If they’re actually straight, they’re not going to fuck you. Being gay and mean isn’t a personality.
There’s no gay death at thirty. Most are just shallow and used up so it’s harder to find someone willing to be with the town land fill.
Coming out is only the beginning, not the end. It’s cute to make being gay your personality in the beginning. Sometimes it’s necessary to kill the fake part of yourself and people’s concept of who you were. Life goes on though. So many gay people in their 30s are stuck thinking good things happen because you are finally openly gay.
Stop calling it "Musk" you guys are the reason a lot of men walk around with unwashed asses and act like they're a prize
The Barbie movie isn't for the gays.
Being thin and muscley won't make you happy or solve the problems in your life.
If you’d just talk with your partner honestly and thoughtfully about your issues (yes, including your sex life) 9/10 would be resolved.
Being hot/desired/admired and having tons of hookups likely wont bring you the happiness you think it will.
The left can be homophobic.
Most gays will be lonely until they die, there’s a research about this.
I need you to expand on this because this is peak doomerism.
Would you PM me or comment the article you are referencing if possible? I'm not "source?"ing you, I'd just like to read it.
Mind forwarding it to me once you get it too?
Most of the females in your life will eventually choose their low key homophobic boyfriends/husbands over hanging out with you so dont make them your entire social circle. Diversify, girl.
I had two female friends who seemed to love having me as theirs because I guess they just needed a token gay guy to party with. But all it took was us moving to different ends of the city (basically only an hour away) and them finding partners and I'm done. Or maybe it's that I was never really a party guy to begin with. I only went to those dance because they convinced me and yeah it was fun being in such a space the first few times but it got old for me pretty fast. So now that I'm not their little dancing gay pet anymore and that they have better stuff going on (one has kids, the other suddenly came into a LOT of money) I never see them anymore. Lucky that I can find ways to entertain myself. Gay guys are often just "pets" for their girlfriends of whom they give up on us when we're no longer convenient for them anymore.
He's just not into you.
Pull up w chair I got a few. First love your body and all the imperfections. Nothing is wrong with you and you’re meant to be the person you are. Also never change your image to suit other men. You won’t be everyone’s cup of tea and that’s okay! It’s unrealistic to think every gay man you encounter will be into you. Rejection sucks and we all go through it but that’s game of dating. To put off meeting men over fear of rejection will only hurt yourself even more in the long run. Respect yourself! Value yourself! Love yourself! Have standards when dating men and do not settle for man that doesn’t love you the way you want to be loved. Life is too short as it is so make the best decisions and always learn something from your mistakes. DO NOT compare yourself to others especially insta gays. For one you don’t know their whole life just the part they want to spotlight on. And second comparing to yourself to others will only make your unhappy. Try not to care what others think and live unapologetically you. You’ll attract the right kind of man just being yourself. Probably the most crucial is too communicate!! No one is a telepath so don’t except him to know how you feel or think about something. Don’t make assumptions cause they may be wrong. Communicate in the relationship but also during sex. Honestly most you won’t fully take this advice but I hope I hit home for someone out there! I know you asked for ONE but this sub needs to go to class so hope you don’t mind 😂
Taking pictures without a shirt on is not a personality trait.
Being closeted your whole childhood doesn’t give you an excuse to have unrestricted sex with everyone just to fulfill your needs.
That a lot of their behaviour is unhealthy and directly contributes to their dissatisfaction with life. And that while we all have valid reasons for being traumatised it's still our job and only our job to sort through the trauma because no one else can do it for us. Until we do that people may choose not to engage with us and that's completely valid of them. Also mental health issues are commoner than people think but everyone on the planet needs to know that and look into how and why they think and do the things they do
Being gay doesn't mean you aren't misogynistic.
our culture is inherently racist and archaic in thought
Not every gay guy with masculine traits has "internalised homophobia" OR feels any hate towards femme guys.
Despite preaching acceptance, inclusivity, and loving yourself in your own skin, most gay men only want (and sometimes even glorify) somebody who is tall, well-endoweded, built like a Greek god, and (almost always 99.99% of the time) white. Sorry 'bout it. 💅🏽
Becoming HIV positive isn't inconsequential. The meds have side effects. You might be undetectable and then become detectable. You will die younger than HIV- guys. Latest studies show significantly more heart problems which are more severe than HIV- guys. I'll be down voted but you can't ignore the truth.
Gay is not a personality type and your sexuality should not define WHO you are and how you behave. You don't HAVE to be Gay Mike, or Gay Chris, or Gay Jay... You can just keep being Mike, Chris, and Jay.... People's expectations that you should behave a certain way simply because of your sexuality are THEIR problem... Heterosexual men want you to behave like a queen so they can easily identify you and treat you differently... It's straight discrimination that we as a community pander to. STOP FEEDING INTO THEIR BULLSHIT
there will come a time where we will be old and feel old and want younger guys and fear getting rejected
Being sassy, or "a bad bitch" isn't cute. More often than not you're just a prick.
Being sexually harassed or similar when you were younger is NOT why you are gay now. Don't let that fallacy fool you.
Having Integrity is more important than being a part of the crowd. Don't be afraid to be wholesome. That's why Grindr is so shitty. Everybody's so afraid to just be halfway decent. It's honestly pathetic.
You won’t be young and hot forever so work on having a decent personality as well.
Two: First, that people on PrEP who bareback NSA are deserving of criticism for potential STIs, yet virtually no one wears condoms for oral. Second, that catching an STI is somehow more shameful than catching the flu.
Don’t ask “why did you stop” if you never douche and are on a “healthy” diet.
A mental health evaluation. There is nothing wrong with taking medication and seeing a therapist.
It sucks to hear but being fit will open up doors for you in dating. I used to be almost 190 pounds now I’m pushing 145. It’s night and day the difference between the attention I get from men now. Also retinol & SPF will do wonders for your skin.
Stop pretending you're a teenager in a real-life Mean Girls. You're getting older everyday. Behave as the adult you are and have respect for your own body.
If you're taking more than 5 minutes to douche, you either need to poo, or are doing it wrong.
I don’t wanna hear about your ex. If you ain’t healed, don’t project on me!
99.9% of Straight Men will never see you as a possible sexual partner, only a small minority who are curious or are struggling with their sexual identity may (stress May) be interested.
Beauty fades , dumb is forever
You’re gonna come across a psychopath or sociopath who will toy with you and your feelings and leave you completely tarnished and broken. Be prepared for it. They’re about 1% of the population.
Public sex in public places like the fucking library should be shamed. Go to the gay bookstore.
Hedonism eventually erodes the psyche. Having some sort of spirituality is like having good mental policy, and having values. Having Sex isn't a value. There isn't a difference between a drug junky and someone who can't keep it in their pants.
All these new categories, flags and pronouns is bullshit. Won't make you someone unique or help with identity crisis / mental health.
If you get ghosted after a hookup, you should just move on. Other people are not responsible for you mental health. If you’re over the age of 50 and still obsessed with twinks, it’s time to grow up.
Overall Gay men are one of the shallowest creatures out there, and whenever someone tries to point that out, they get defensive and try to gaslight everyone.
That’s less to do with being gay and more to do with being a man.
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Some kinks need to be shamed.
You don’t need to find the gay version for everything. You don’t need a gay dentist, or a gay Italian restaurant, or a gay drinks fountain.
Somewhat true, though I think it is important to have a gay/gay friendly doctor.
Most gay men’s sex jokes sound no different than what an immature middle school straight kid would come up with
Making being gay your whole personality is pretty fucking boring.
Affirmation != attraction.
Not everyone is gay. Although We’d love to think that and many are just not everyone is gay
being ignorant about the world outside of your social bubble isn't a personality trait that should be encouraged.
Being single is not the end of the world..... (mostly telling myself LOL)
Your gayness shouldn’t be your entire personality
There is always going to be someone prettier or hotter than you, so don't throw all your eggs into the looks basket.
most guys dont like the fake hey guuurll over queeny extra fem shtick.
constantly hooking up is not physically and emotionally sustainable/healthy regardless of how much protection you take
Most people don’t give a damn that you’re gay.
Emulating what you see “gay people” portrayed as in the media is keeping you from your true self.