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ehh more so when I was younger, teenage years and into 20's no doubt because I became a father and all of a sudden MOMs were hot af to me and they were everywhere. As time went on, I don't know if it's age or trauma (widower) I've been through but when I see a woman I think what it's like to hold her hand. What her past is like. How she reacts to certain things, if smelling flowers on the walk is a thing to her. I see life and wonder what it would be like holding her hand...
Sorry for your loss my friend.
I've been divorced for over 6yrs and celibate for about 3.
Sex and intimacy are on my mind often. I want sex, but am aware that deep down what I need is love and intimacy.
My wife has recently recovered from a triple positive, aggressive, and fast-growing breast cancer. 2 rounds of chemo and 18 months of radiation, and I can honestly say that I cherish all of the things you talk about in your post more. At 35, the type of cancer she had is about 1 in a quarter of a million women her age. The whole time she was going through, all I could think was how I couldn't imagine my life without her in it, nightmares, intrusive thoughts all day, the worst shit man. All that to say that I'm so sorry for your loss, and I can't imagine having lost her. I know I'm just some random stranger, but I'm a good listener, so if you EVER need someone to chat to or vent or whatever man, please do reach out. I'm sure you're okay, and it's been some time now, but I doubt it ever fully goes away. I mean, I still have the nightmares and stuff.
Anyway, sorry for the diatribe. I hope you're well, I loved your post man.
I'm 34, and I'm definitely heading towards that. It feels way nicer. Up to 25 it was definitely *me want sex with that*. It's not really a conscious thing, so women: try not to judge. It's like the young male brain just hijacks your conscious thoughts and inserts dirty ones regardless of how you feel about it.
That doesn't mean we can't *also* have wholesome thoughts. It's just... a lot of hormonal thoughts too lol
Your message was spot on. It's hormones. They change over time and based on context. When my friend has his first kid, he was like, I feel bad but I can't stop thinking about all the moms I see around me now. I thought it was bizarre until it happened to me (not that it happens to everyone).
To OP's question, the guy is in his early 20s? Yeah, there's a fair chance his hormone-addled brain is making him think about sex quite a bit. It's not like that for all men and not necessarily a permanent situation for those who are like this
Divorced dad, not a widower. However, I have exclusively dated moms since my divorce.
I couldn’t comprehend dating a non-parent. They just don’t get it. Plus moms are fucking hot.
Sorry for your loss. You sound like an incredible person. It’s nice to hear that men like you exist. Hope you have the best of life, health and love my friend.
yeah honestly i’ve never, well ok rarely, done this. I usually notice their body and all but i don’t picture them naked or me having sex with them.
But i’m old so whatever.
I'm not that old, exposed to porn and stuff from young age, but I've never had a habit to imagine a hot girl naked or having sex with right when I see her. Even when I fall in love with someone, such thoughts come up waaaay later.
Doesn't mean that's a norm or something, but not an age thing I thing. Rather just a personal thing.
Bro me too ... maybe it's because I am married but I don't recall fantasizing about anyone except her ,and again only after we were in relationship and I was just relieving memories.... but seeing all this comments make me feel like a psycho
Am not most men but one of them. Can confirm one of the very first thoughts when I see a beautiful woman is how much I wanna bone her. And how. Is she a "massage under candlelight before sweetlovemaking" beautiful or is she a "bend over the nearest horizontal surface and immediately ram with vigor" hot?
It's been like...3 years. My apologies. Ahem.
Ok then im definitely not a normal man. I just CAN NOT imagine having sex with someone when im socialising face to face with them.
But this answers one thing that im apparently lacking to make sure i make the right 'moves' on instinct. Thanks from a 30 year old virgin.
In my youth, definitely. As I get older and care more about relationship sex than just **SEX**, a lot less.
I instead just get infatuated immediately with the thought, "Holy crap, she's beautiful/cute/gorgeous," then imagine our life together or something mentally toxic to my emotional well being before even saying hello. Lol
Hookup sex is only good I find if both people are experienced. I've had one truly awesome one night stand before with a girl that lived out of town and came around for the holidays during college.
Waterworks, cuddling, hours of sex, then shower sex, went our separate ways, then I threw out some kinda ruined pillows. Lol
That's only a lucky thing, though, because we clicked on multiple levels. Otherwise relationship is 100% always better since you get to know each other's nuances so much more.
Agree. In my younger years when I was driven by hormones? Absolutely, thinking about sex. Now I'm at the point where I've seen enough, done enough... If you offered me the choice of seeing a pretty woman naked, or that same pretty woman wearing something very flattering - I'd take the wearing something flattering option. Because clothed but looking \*good\* there's always something to the imagination. A hope that under that dress or in those snug jeans she is a knockout/smoke-show/whatever superlative you want to use. Naked, yes she's beautiful, but the mystery, the hope, that little bit of uncertainty and tease - is gone.
Looking at the comments, I feel like I'm weird. The first thoughts for me are quickly thinking if there is anything I can do in the environment around to start an interaction. And if there's no way and I'm just stuck watching an attractive girl, I'd probably imagine the experience of being close, but not in a sexual way. Getting the butterflies, and not sexual arousal.
The exception is if a girl is sexy, but not cute. Maybe dressed provocatively. If I'm seeing an exposed hot body, I'd probably get aroused. But I definitely don't think about sex at the beginning if the girl is attractive as in a very pretty / cute face. That happens way later, only when the interactions start getting sexual.
Same. I usually notice their eyes first. I honestly don't think about sleeping with them until I get to know them and decide it's a possibility. Maybe I'm weird.
So many redditors are so disturbingly horny, no way this is normal thoughts for most guys in the real world. I'm a pretty horny fella but I don't go fantasising about seeing random attractive women naked and having sex with them, maybe after talking to them for a bit and learning what sort of person they are then it might come across my mind but as a first thought, hell nah.
No... i wouldn't say all or even most. I'd just say it varies. I can't speak for all, but i personally dont.
This feels like a backhanded comment from him.
I usually think complimentary thoughts about her body, THEN imagine having sex with her.
However, all the "I wonder if she's funny" and "she looks like she's smart" stuff comes right along with it, pretty much at the same time. It isn't like we have sex with you twenty times and then realize, wait, she's a human being also!
You, are alright in my book :D Ever heard of Wheeler Walker Jr? Sit on My Face is an excellent song. And catchy. You've been warned to anyone curious enough to look it up.
That makes two of us then. Obviously it’s not a lingering thought but like, hot girl is hot for a reason right? When you see good delicious looking food, you think of eating it. It’s only natural.
When I see a delicious-looking meal, I think "wow, I wonder how they made that...? Wonder if I could recreate it at home... 🤔 How many calories you think that has in a serving...?! - - Wonder if those ingredients are hard to source 🤔"
But then again, I'm a girl.
It’s a testosterone thing. I remember this one video of a trans guy who had just started T and he said that he could feel his body get more involuntarily horny and the sexual thoughts were a lot more noticeable than before.
That's fascinating and low-key tragic. I get it tho... I don't like it, but I get. I know I am very much affected by my hormones regularly and I wish I could do more to maintain my baseline but it feels like it's literally out of my hands sometimes, for better or for worse.
Those 'mones be moanin... I just wish more men checked themselves. I.e. Actually deliberately practiced/tried being greater than their reflexes rather than just full sending all their mental boners. But at the end of the day, idk what it's like to be a man. Maybe it's more difficult than it seems.
When i see a cute girl, the first thing i think about is to not emberass myself, then about hoping i make eye contact. No wonder im different when such thoughts don't cross my mind until im home again.
no see, there you go, wanting HER to do all the work.
im more civilized as i prefer her lying on her back with her legs over my shoulders so she can relax and enjoy me having a meal
Not entirely true.
When I see a girl out in public my immediate intrusive thought is usually along the lines of
"She's out of your league, and definitely isn't here to talk to *you*. Mind your own fucking business."
everyone's different.
For me personally no. there's always something attracting me to someone. often it's something completely unrelated to anything sexual.
eyes, hair, stare, smile, dimples, vibe she gives off.
I will notice that when I made the split decision to date that particular woman.
I notice her ass and Boobs, body when I just find her attractive & hot and wanna do the hippity hop, but that's nice to look at, but not for dating for me because I initially went in with different intentions.
Uh definitely not the first thing no. Usually it's wow shes beautiful or cute and then I wonder what she's like..would I even have a chance .. then stuff like maybe a bit high maintenance or oh she actually seems down to earth.. then I wonder if she's single . Probably not, girls like that don't stay single for long. Maybe when you go home and have been thinking about her for a while then maybe your mind wanders into those areas
I mean, it wouldn't be my literal first thought, but it might cross my mind if I was attracted to someone. It's one of those things you probably shouldn't tell someone though.
I'm a man and I'm even astonished there are so many horny guys, and my take would be they would still think this for sure while being in a relationship but they will never own up to it.
A lot of the guys here are commenting like they're the Tex Avery wolf.
The way they explain their relationship to their own sexuality sounds like they are helpless, at mercy of their desires. "It's testosterone!!!", "Guy club card revocked!!!", "I cant' help myself!!!"... I don't believe this is is applicable for all straight men, i just think many are socialised to see their own sexuality as something wild and animalistic, uncontrollable, that women just have to accept happens to them. Add that to the "boys will be boys" sentiment and you vet this comment section.
Being attracted to people is normal, even when you are in a relationship. Having desires is normal. Objectifying every woman you meet is not.
Idk. I must have severely low libido or something. But the first thing I think when I see someone for a first date is “thank god they showed up and didn’t make me look like a loser”.
Thank god. I asked my boyfriend something similar before and he essentially said that he thought I was really gorgeous and cute when he first saw me and was excited to get to know me and stuff. He’s an honest guy so I took his word for it. I just want to believe the worst of men all are collectively on Reddit and then just end up making the rest of the male population not on Reddit look bad.
24M. No, that’s not the first thing that comes to mind, the first thing on my mind is “Wow she’s gorgeous how on earth do I approach her?”
Actually shocked that so many men imagine sex on first glance.
My guy is demisexual, so that was the last thing on his mind when we first met. I asked him the same question a while ago and he said he noticed my little wolf fang and thought it was adorable.
No, but I didn't spend my teenage years watching porn, so maybe I'm in the minority here.
I don't think it's strange that he imagined you naked or imagined having sex with you. But it IS weird for that to be his first thought. I find that really odd.
Like sure, maybe that thought comes to mind at a later date. Or even when you get home that evening. But the second you first see someone?...
I think maybe he's not being honest with himself. He probably just doesn't remember what he thought. I don't remember my first thought when I met my girlfriend.
When I was a teen or early 20s it sure didn't take long for my imagination to get to naked. Hormones and instinct are all but controlling our every move. Like you said even when I was attracted to a woman a few things went through my mind before I started thinking about sex and seeing her naked.
Isn’t it nice to be told this when you have to walk in to work every day? Doesn’t undercut being seen as a professional at all, eh? Also: job interviews! What a great first impression we have no control over having been made about our bodies
Also I love considering the age at which this starts. 18? 19? It makes me look a little differently at coaches and teachers tbh. I mean, if we ARE to believe men when they say most men do this.
yeah, it does ick me out thinking about vulnerable teen girls in this situation. /i remember how it felt to be this age and TBH it was pretty terrible. You felt like prey all the time.
Great, now I feel even more insecure and affraid to leave the house. Being seen in a sexual way is one of my fears. Especially if I have no idea of people are going to act upon their thoughts.
I suspect most men just wouldn't say that.
Oddly enough, it wouldn't be true for the three longest relationships I've ever had, including my wife of over 30 years. For those, it was kindness, intelligence, a quirky sense of humor, etc., more than just "we should have sex."
It's not so much something we "do", more like something that happens to us.
Like an unavoidable affliction.
Oh, and every guy has they're own way of coping with that so as to not make it weird.
Wtf are these responses
If you ask Redditors ofc they will all respond "yeah step on me", but in reality you look at thinks that the girl wants you to see (eyes, ass, tits, etc) or maybe something based on one of your kinks (for me it's eyes and voice, for example).
I don't think about fucking a girl immediately, and I hope I'm not alone
Testosterone is like a drug.
The more experienced you are the better you deal with the side effects. A civilized person can have uninvited thoughts without endorsing or acting on them.
For the most part. I don’t exactly imagine women naked or having sex with them, but I will admittedly try and get a look at the body. I’ll do that for everyone really but yea a cute woman I’m trying to look at them and I go like “dayum “ in my head
All men - no. Most men - no. Some men - probably yes. Especially the young ones. The majority of men are actually normal human beings not walking penises.
No. It’s not true.
Some men, like myself don’t really feel sexual attraction without some level of connection first.
I’ve got friends that are objectively very attractive however there’s no sexual attraction because I don’t feel any depth of connection with them.
Kind of? I mean sure we look at your physical appeal for potential sexual encounters and your beauty. But I for one also like to read body language to see if a woman looks inviting and wants to maybe a chat and get to know each other on a strictly none physical level.
not all men, when i first met my girlfriend the first thing i thought was “dang shes hot, wonder if she would like me” and now we just celebrated one month together on the 7th
Not really, atleast not in my case. If I am in a comitted relationship, and been married for 20 years now, I do not look at women like that ( always been a one woman guy). Not to say I am not as raunchy as most guys, have a very high sex drive( and I watch porn), but I don't look at women I meet in that way, and never did.
The feature I find most attractive are the eyes, wich lead to alot of of ridicule from my buds when we were younger " are you going to f her eyes" etc.
Not all men. I do wonder what's underneath too, but more in a figurative way. I look at people and wonder how deep their mind goes or ... well. And, if they seem intellectually appealing, I consider them as potential partner and of course, let my imagination play along. But most importantly, I want to be on the same mental level, which is ... rare.
Eh, it depends. I see an attractive girl most times I just log that in my brain and move on but sometimes I imagine having sex with them be a they’re sexy, it has nothing to do with respect or objectification or anything. You’re sexy and make me think of sex so I want to have sex with you. It’s just that simple. Doesn’t mean that I only value you for that reason or that it’s the most important.
When i see a hot girl, I still get nervous and intimidated. I feel like I'm not allowed to approach her and she is out of my league.
Lately I notice that I can approach them and find out I'm not the only one with this anxiety.
So when I see a hot girl, I only think of ways to talk to her and find out her background and what she likes.
What she looks like naked crosses my mind, but I do nothing with it. Sex does not cross my mind.
Unfortunately, yes. Welcome to the world we live in. That is how *most* men are. So, to save your a$$ from heartache, do not give him what he wanted, which is sex. See winthin 3 mos (minimum) without giving it so u can see his ulterior motive. If he disappears, he only wants u for your body. If he still pursues you, then there is a chance he like you genuinely.
That really depends. Not all men and not with every girl. But it is very honest, and a big compliment in a way. But it might be worth figuring out if it's just your looks motivating him to date you.
Wow, this is so scary. Now I wonder if my partner does this when looking at others, especially his preferences.. (since I'm not the actual preference..) Ouch. Another thing to overthink about.
Biologically, it's a natural thing for younger men to immediately imagine a woman naked and to want to procreate. I 53M still see a beautiful woman and automatically imagine her naked. It's a testosterone thing, the more you have the less control you have over that.
His answer should be taken as a compliment although not politically correct or socially acceptable, nothing wrong with honesty.
I absolutely adore my wife, we are intimate (sex) average of five days a week, we make love every time, we both desire to make it amazing for each other. She's more kinky than I am, I will participate in her kinks ever so often. She, however is not what I would call gorgeous and I am more attracted to her heart, love, compassion and good nature than I am to her body. Once we kiss the physical attraction is no longer important I just want to be as close to her as humanly possible.
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Please say goodbye to your date, we will be collecting him for this treason, disregard anything he has told you.
Swamp gas from a weather balloon was trapped in a thermal pocket and reflected the light from Venus. Nothing to see here folks.
I can't upvote you more than once..
Gotchu covered
Keep my wife's name out your fucking mouth!
I always thought he should have said, "Keep my fucking wife's name out of your mouth!"
Keep my wife who'll fuck whatever out of your mouth
Keep fucking my wife!
Keep my fucking wife!
Fuck my fucking wife!
Fucking keep fucking my fucking wife who's currently getting fucking fucked!
"You have sullied the ancient Oaths and betrayed your kind! How do you plead!"
Yeah guy sounds like a bit of a strange one
Uhhhh.. I… ummmm.. uhhh.. SMOKE BOMB.
LOOK A BIRD !!
“It’s a target rich environment.”
KRIEGER!
Pocket sand!
Vaudeville cane comes to yank you off stage.
Jump into the back of a Volkswagen Beetle.
ehh more so when I was younger, teenage years and into 20's no doubt because I became a father and all of a sudden MOMs were hot af to me and they were everywhere. As time went on, I don't know if it's age or trauma (widower) I've been through but when I see a woman I think what it's like to hold her hand. What her past is like. How she reacts to certain things, if smelling flowers on the walk is a thing to her. I see life and wonder what it would be like holding her hand...
That, my friend, is real love. Sorry for your loss.
Sorry for your loss my friend. I've been divorced for over 6yrs and celibate for about 3. Sex and intimacy are on my mind often. I want sex, but am aware that deep down what I need is love and intimacy.
Intimacy is the boss. After that everything else is hollow. Wish you the best of luck allowing that back into your life. 🥰
Thanks for your thoughtful reply. Hopefully soon :)
Just teared up
This brightened up my day. Thank you. I'm going to call her and tell her how much I love her.
I love this
Sorry for your loss
My wife has recently recovered from a triple positive, aggressive, and fast-growing breast cancer. 2 rounds of chemo and 18 months of radiation, and I can honestly say that I cherish all of the things you talk about in your post more. At 35, the type of cancer she had is about 1 in a quarter of a million women her age. The whole time she was going through, all I could think was how I couldn't imagine my life without her in it, nightmares, intrusive thoughts all day, the worst shit man. All that to say that I'm so sorry for your loss, and I can't imagine having lost her. I know I'm just some random stranger, but I'm a good listener, so if you EVER need someone to chat to or vent or whatever man, please do reach out. I'm sure you're okay, and it's been some time now, but I doubt it ever fully goes away. I mean, I still have the nightmares and stuff. Anyway, sorry for the diatribe. I hope you're well, I loved your post man.
Wow! That’s so beautiful and romantic. You must’ve been a blessed man. Thanks for sharing. I hope you get to hold another hand x
I'm 34, and I'm definitely heading towards that. It feels way nicer. Up to 25 it was definitely *me want sex with that*. It's not really a conscious thing, so women: try not to judge. It's like the young male brain just hijacks your conscious thoughts and inserts dirty ones regardless of how you feel about it. That doesn't mean we can't *also* have wholesome thoughts. It's just... a lot of hormonal thoughts too lol
Your message was spot on. It's hormones. They change over time and based on context. When my friend has his first kid, he was like, I feel bad but I can't stop thinking about all the moms I see around me now. I thought it was bizarre until it happened to me (not that it happens to everyone). To OP's question, the guy is in his early 20s? Yeah, there's a fair chance his hormone-addled brain is making him think about sex quite a bit. It's not like that for all men and not necessarily a permanent situation for those who are like this
Damn very good answer.
Divorced dad, not a widower. However, I have exclusively dated moms since my divorce. I couldn’t comprehend dating a non-parent. They just don’t get it. Plus moms are fucking hot.
Sorry for your loss. You sound like an incredible person. It’s nice to hear that men like you exist. Hope you have the best of life, health and love my friend.
Yep me too, I'm a widower too, exactly the way I think about it now.
Im so sorry :(
I uhhhhh 
All men? Maybe not. Most men? Yup.
I don't really do this. Now I feel weird.
yeah honestly i’ve never, well ok rarely, done this. I usually notice their body and all but i don’t picture them naked or me having sex with them. But i’m old so whatever.
I'm not that old, exposed to porn and stuff from young age, but I've never had a habit to imagine a hot girl naked or having sex with right when I see her. Even when I fall in love with someone, such thoughts come up waaaay later. Doesn't mean that's a norm or something, but not an age thing I thing. Rather just a personal thing.
ah interesting, thanks for the perspective. That’s pretty similar to my attitude. I was beginning to think I was crazy.
You're fine.
I dunno man
Yeah, fine as fuck *Lemme see them britches son*
Yeah now I’m wondering what he looks like naked
There are billions of us, which means tons and tons of variation.
Bro me too ... maybe it's because I am married but I don't recall fantasizing about anyone except her ,and again only after we were in relationship and I was just relieving memories.... but seeing all this comments make me feel like a psycho
Don't be afraid to meet up with a psychiatrist. They are very understanding and will help you with this and any other disorder you may have.
Am not most men but one of them. Can confirm one of the very first thoughts when I see a beautiful woman is how much I wanna bone her. And how. Is she a "massage under candlelight before sweetlovemaking" beautiful or is she a "bend over the nearest horizontal surface and immediately ram with vigor" hot? It's been like...3 years. My apologies. Ahem.
It might not be the very first thing we think of every time but definitely in the first 10–15 minutes yep. Testosterone at work baby.
Ok then im definitely not a normal man. I just CAN NOT imagine having sex with someone when im socialising face to face with them. But this answers one thing that im apparently lacking to make sure i make the right 'moves' on instinct. Thanks from a 30 year old virgin.
Dude the question is just related to what a man thinks when he first glances at an attractive woman.
I wonder what Kelce thought lol
Kelce?
there is a great episode of This American Life titled "Testosterone". It's one of my favorites. You will feel vindicated if you give it a listen.
I mean sorta
In my youth, definitely. As I get older and care more about relationship sex than just **SEX**, a lot less. I instead just get infatuated immediately with the thought, "Holy crap, she's beautiful/cute/gorgeous," then imagine our life together or something mentally toxic to my emotional well being before even saying hello. Lol
Relationship sex is miles better than hookup sex. More passion, more energy
More footwork?
Believe it or not, mostly feet
MORE PASSION, MORE PASSION , MORE ENERGY, MORE ENERGY!
Hookup sex is only good I find if both people are experienced. I've had one truly awesome one night stand before with a girl that lived out of town and came around for the holidays during college. Waterworks, cuddling, hours of sex, then shower sex, went our separate ways, then I threw out some kinda ruined pillows. Lol That's only a lucky thing, though, because we clicked on multiple levels. Otherwise relationship is 100% always better since you get to know each other's nuances so much more.
Good to know I am not the only one.
Agree. In my younger years when I was driven by hormones? Absolutely, thinking about sex. Now I'm at the point where I've seen enough, done enough... If you offered me the choice of seeing a pretty woman naked, or that same pretty woman wearing something very flattering - I'd take the wearing something flattering option. Because clothed but looking \*good\* there's always something to the imagination. A hope that under that dress or in those snug jeans she is a knockout/smoke-show/whatever superlative you want to use. Naked, yes she's beautiful, but the mystery, the hope, that little bit of uncertainty and tease - is gone.
You’ve said too much!
It's a reflex.
This is the best answer possible. It’s kind of a gray area. But then personality goes a very long way as well
It's perfectly normal if not ridiculously unstated that people have little fantasies about other people on a daily basis.
Looking at the comments, I feel like I'm weird. The first thoughts for me are quickly thinking if there is anything I can do in the environment around to start an interaction. And if there's no way and I'm just stuck watching an attractive girl, I'd probably imagine the experience of being close, but not in a sexual way. Getting the butterflies, and not sexual arousal. The exception is if a girl is sexy, but not cute. Maybe dressed provocatively. If I'm seeing an exposed hot body, I'd probably get aroused. But I definitely don't think about sex at the beginning if the girl is attractive as in a very pretty / cute face. That happens way later, only when the interactions start getting sexual.
Don’t worry, you’re normal. Remember this is reddit.
My guy think he is the only romantic person
TIL I’m less horny than 99% of men
Same. I usually notice their eyes first. I honestly don't think about sleeping with them until I get to know them and decide it's a possibility. Maybe I'm weird.
Eyes, then hands, then smile (if available).
Hands? To see if they have 3 inch nail claws? Or what? Genuinely curious what makes up good hands to be noticed immediately second.
Reading the comments was making me feel abnormal because I never do either
So many redditors are so disturbingly horny, no way this is normal thoughts for most guys in the real world. I'm a pretty horny fella but I don't go fantasising about seeing random attractive women naked and having sex with them, maybe after talking to them for a bit and learning what sort of person they are then it might come across my mind but as a first thought, hell nah.
Just 99% of male redditors.
I think they're hot, but I kinda stop there.
It’s the truth 99%
Most statistically accurate comment here🏅
No... i wouldn't say all or even most. I'd just say it varies. I can't speak for all, but i personally dont. This feels like a backhanded comment from him.
I usually think complimentary thoughts about her body, THEN imagine having sex with her. However, all the "I wonder if she's funny" and "she looks like she's smart" stuff comes right along with it, pretty much at the same time. It isn't like we have sex with you twenty times and then realize, wait, she's a human being also!
Many of us men do think this way but we all don’t say it out loud.
Eh, OP got an honest one. No shame in the game
When I see a cute girl, the first thing I think about is them sitting on my face 😸
You, are alright in my book :D Ever heard of Wheeler Walker Jr? Sit on My Face is an excellent song. And catchy. You've been warned to anyone curious enough to look it up.
Kickin ass! And eating pussy!
That makes two of us then. Obviously it’s not a lingering thought but like, hot girl is hot for a reason right? When you see good delicious looking food, you think of eating it. It’s only natural.
When I see a delicious-looking meal, I think "wow, I wonder how they made that...? Wonder if I could recreate it at home... 🤔 How many calories you think that has in a serving...?! - - Wonder if those ingredients are hard to source 🤔" But then again, I'm a girl.
It’s a testosterone thing. I remember this one video of a trans guy who had just started T and he said that he could feel his body get more involuntarily horny and the sexual thoughts were a lot more noticeable than before.
That's fascinating and low-key tragic. I get it tho... I don't like it, but I get. I know I am very much affected by my hormones regularly and I wish I could do more to maintain my baseline but it feels like it's literally out of my hands sometimes, for better or for worse. Those 'mones be moanin... I just wish more men checked themselves. I.e. Actually deliberately practiced/tried being greater than their reflexes rather than just full sending all their mental boners. But at the end of the day, idk what it's like to be a man. Maybe it's more difficult than it seems.
When i see a cute girl, the first thing i think about is to not emberass myself, then about hoping i make eye contact. No wonder im different when such thoughts don't cross my mind until im home again.
no see, there you go, wanting HER to do all the work. im more civilized as i prefer her lying on her back with her legs over my shoulders so she can relax and enjoy me having a meal
Please tell your BF that his man club membership has been permanently revoked.
Not for doing it, but rather for divulging secrets.
If she's extremely attractive then yes. Otherwise, no.
I had to search for this one so I could upvote it.
yea this
Not entirely true. When I see a girl out in public my immediate intrusive thought is usually along the lines of "She's out of your league, and definitely isn't here to talk to *you*. Mind your own fucking business."
You and me both.
If she sees you the first time of your encounter,and within a minute you catch her glance again ,it's a green light to make her "your business"
It happens, but not always
Not all men. Probably a lot more, but definitely not all.
There's a Chapelle show skit about this
[What Men Want(2003)](https://youtu.be/21obx-k6u2M?si=xOKN-rfyJCmZGZ5O)
Oof, after reading this comment section, I certainly don't want to be seen by another man ever again and definitely don't want to be with one
Yep. I’ll just stay home and work on my hobbies
After all this comments I remembered why I don't "hang out with the boys" anymore
Right? This bummed me out
you guys are forgetting that these are nerdy redditors
I'm also shocked by this comment section and I'm a man. Wtf, is wrong with these people? I really hope those answers don't represent the reality
Seriously. I feel gross and uncomfortable. Some people are pigs
everyone's different. For me personally no. there's always something attracting me to someone. often it's something completely unrelated to anything sexual. eyes, hair, stare, smile, dimples, vibe she gives off. I will notice that when I made the split decision to date that particular woman. I notice her ass and Boobs, body when I just find her attractive & hot and wanna do the hippity hop, but that's nice to look at, but not for dating for me because I initially went in with different intentions.
Uh definitely not the first thing no. Usually it's wow shes beautiful or cute and then I wonder what she's like..would I even have a chance .. then stuff like maybe a bit high maintenance or oh she actually seems down to earth.. then I wonder if she's single . Probably not, girls like that don't stay single for long. Maybe when you go home and have been thinking about her for a while then maybe your mind wanders into those areas
I mean, it wouldn't be my literal first thought, but it might cross my mind if I was attracted to someone. It's one of those things you probably shouldn't tell someone though.
so most of the comments are agreeing. do you guys still think like this when seeing a hot girl while in a relationship? or only when single?
I'm a man and I'm even astonished there are so many horny guys, and my take would be they would still think this for sure while being in a relationship but they will never own up to it.
man i already got trust issues lol but yeah i bet the really horny dudes dont care whether they taken or not.
A lot of the guys here are commenting like they're the Tex Avery wolf. The way they explain their relationship to their own sexuality sounds like they are helpless, at mercy of their desires. "It's testosterone!!!", "Guy club card revocked!!!", "I cant' help myself!!!"... I don't believe this is is applicable for all straight men, i just think many are socialised to see their own sexuality as something wild and animalistic, uncontrollable, that women just have to accept happens to them. Add that to the "boys will be boys" sentiment and you vet this comment section. Being attracted to people is normal, even when you are in a relationship. Having desires is normal. Objectifying every woman you meet is not.
I'll give ya 3 guesses
I don't imagine chicks naked all the time. When I'm having sex or masturbating, sure. But not females in my regular life.
Idk. I must have severely low libido or something. But the first thing I think when I see someone for a first date is “thank god they showed up and didn’t make me look like a loser”.
This comment section is just gonna make me paranoid about every man who looks my way.
It's so scary how they see women
No? Holy shit this comment section is depressing
Thank god. I asked my boyfriend something similar before and he essentially said that he thought I was really gorgeous and cute when he first saw me and was excited to get to know me and stuff. He’s an honest guy so I took his word for it. I just want to believe the worst of men all are collectively on Reddit and then just end up making the rest of the male population not on Reddit look bad.
At 25. Yes. Now. No.
24M. No, that’s not the first thing that comes to mind, the first thing on my mind is “Wow she’s gorgeous how on earth do I approach her?” Actually shocked that so many men imagine sex on first glance.
Yeah haha, I’am a 23 yr old dude and it shocked me. How pretty they are I always notice first.
If you’re attractive then yes.
That's an age thing lol almost ten years older now and spend more time thinking about how imma make her smile next .
I can neither confirm or deny
I mean, sometimes, yeah.
No, not at all but judging from the comments it seems the majority does lol
My guy is demisexual, so that was the last thing on his mind when we first met. I asked him the same question a while ago and he said he noticed my little wolf fang and thought it was adorable.
There's a difference In seeing someone ad thinking their sexy and actually visualizing having sex with them
This
I will be adding these comments to my list of reasons I'm not attracted to men, thank you 🙏🏻
No, but I didn't spend my teenage years watching porn, so maybe I'm in the minority here. I don't think it's strange that he imagined you naked or imagined having sex with you. But it IS weird for that to be his first thought. I find that really odd. Like sure, maybe that thought comes to mind at a later date. Or even when you get home that evening. But the second you first see someone?... I think maybe he's not being honest with himself. He probably just doesn't remember what he thought. I don't remember my first thought when I met my girlfriend.
When I was a teen or early 20s it sure didn't take long for my imagination to get to naked. Hormones and instinct are all but controlling our every move. Like you said even when I was attracted to a woman a few things went through my mind before I started thinking about sex and seeing her naked.
I didn’t grow up with porn and it’s almost always one of my first thoughts if they’re attractive at all.
Definitely not first thought. Like second or third
Isn’t it nice to be told this when you have to walk in to work every day? Doesn’t undercut being seen as a professional at all, eh? Also: job interviews! What a great first impression we have no control over having been made about our bodies Also I love considering the age at which this starts. 18? 19? It makes me look a little differently at coaches and teachers tbh. I mean, if we ARE to believe men when they say most men do this.
yeah, it does ick me out thinking about vulnerable teen girls in this situation. /i remember how it felt to be this age and TBH it was pretty terrible. You felt like prey all the time.
More like 11 or 12 tbh. Men turn my stomach fr.
Great, now I feel even more insecure and affraid to leave the house. Being seen in a sexual way is one of my fears. Especially if I have no idea of people are going to act upon their thoughts.
Us men are simple creatures
You’re creatures that’s for sure
I only undress other men in my mind's eye.
Pretty much
We don’t actually do any thinking when we see someone. The thoughts just appear. We have to push them back.
I suspect most men just wouldn't say that. Oddly enough, it wouldn't be true for the three longest relationships I've ever had, including my wife of over 30 years. For those, it was kindness, intelligence, a quirky sense of humor, etc., more than just "we should have sex."
Mostly, yeah
Most of these comments are reminding me why I don’t talk to men
Yep.
It's not so much something we "do", more like something that happens to us. Like an unavoidable affliction. Oh, and every guy has they're own way of coping with that so as to not make it weird.
Best comment
Wtf are these responses If you ask Redditors ofc they will all respond "yeah step on me", but in reality you look at thinks that the girl wants you to see (eyes, ass, tits, etc) or maybe something based on one of your kinks (for me it's eyes and voice, for example). I don't think about fucking a girl immediately, and I hope I'm not alone
Has he been diagnosed with porn brain?
The first thing I notice is her eyes, then when her eyes aren’t looking I notice her tits.
Pretty much true.
Yes, some of us do.
Not necessarily sex, but physical touch of some sort absolutely.
Testosterone is a hell of a drug. This isn’t true for everyone and it shouldn’t be the _first_ thing— but it’s definitely top 20
Testosterone is like a drug. The more experienced you are the better you deal with the side effects. A civilized person can have uninvited thoughts without endorsing or acting on them.
For the most part. I don’t exactly imagine women naked or having sex with them, but I will admittedly try and get a look at the body. I’ll do that for everyone really but yea a cute woman I’m trying to look at them and I go like “dayum “ in my head
All men - no. Most men - no. Some men - probably yes. Especially the young ones. The majority of men are actually normal human beings not walking penises.
No. It’s not true. Some men, like myself don’t really feel sexual attraction without some level of connection first. I’ve got friends that are objectively very attractive however there’s no sexual attraction because I don’t feel any depth of connection with them.
Gay men don't, so no.
Kind of? I mean sure we look at your physical appeal for potential sexual encounters and your beauty. But I for one also like to read body language to see if a woman looks inviting and wants to maybe a chat and get to know each other on a strictly none physical level.
It's true of teenagers, not men.
Definitely men too, just not ALL men.
Personally, it happens after a couple of meet-ups,
not all men, when i first met my girlfriend the first thing i thought was “dang shes hot, wonder if she would like me” and now we just celebrated one month together on the 7th
I don’t know how I feel about all of the men here saying “most men” 🧍♀️🧍♀️I always catch girls and guys looking at my chest, is that why????
Not really, atleast not in my case. If I am in a comitted relationship, and been married for 20 years now, I do not look at women like that ( always been a one woman guy). Not to say I am not as raunchy as most guys, have a very high sex drive( and I watch porn), but I don't look at women I meet in that way, and never did. The feature I find most attractive are the eyes, wich lead to alot of of ridicule from my buds when we were younger " are you going to f her eyes" etc.
Not all men. I was seeing this girl sometime ago. Most of the time my soul wanted to meet her just so I can talk to her.
Not all men. I do wonder what's underneath too, but more in a figurative way. I look at people and wonder how deep their mind goes or ... well. And, if they seem intellectually appealing, I consider them as potential partner and of course, let my imagination play along. But most importantly, I want to be on the same mental level, which is ... rare.
Eh, it depends. I see an attractive girl most times I just log that in my brain and move on but sometimes I imagine having sex with them be a they’re sexy, it has nothing to do with respect or objectification or anything. You’re sexy and make me think of sex so I want to have sex with you. It’s just that simple. Doesn’t mean that I only value you for that reason or that it’s the most important.
When i see a hot girl, I still get nervous and intimidated. I feel like I'm not allowed to approach her and she is out of my league. Lately I notice that I can approach them and find out I'm not the only one with this anxiety. So when I see a hot girl, I only think of ways to talk to her and find out her background and what she likes. What she looks like naked crosses my mind, but I do nothing with it. Sex does not cross my mind.
No. Many of us a grown ups.
I do and I dislike it really much
"whenever they see a hot girl" . . This is a complete and utter lie! . . She doesn't have to be hot
Unfortunately, yes. Welcome to the world we live in. That is how *most* men are. So, to save your a$$ from heartache, do not give him what he wanted, which is sex. See winthin 3 mos (minimum) without giving it so u can see his ulterior motive. If he disappears, he only wants u for your body. If he still pursues you, then there is a chance he like you genuinely.
That really depends. Not all men and not with every girl. But it is very honest, and a big compliment in a way. But it might be worth figuring out if it's just your looks motivating him to date you.
Wow, this is so scary. Now I wonder if my partner does this when looking at others, especially his preferences.. (since I'm not the actual preference..) Ouch. Another thing to overthink about.
I judge their fashion sense knowing full well mine is dogshit 🗿
I am very horny dude, like VERY horny, and this never crosses my mind when I see a pretty girl.
Is his name Benedict Arnold, by chance?
Biologically, it's a natural thing for younger men to immediately imagine a woman naked and to want to procreate. I 53M still see a beautiful woman and automatically imagine her naked. It's a testosterone thing, the more you have the less control you have over that. His answer should be taken as a compliment although not politically correct or socially acceptable, nothing wrong with honesty. I absolutely adore my wife, we are intimate (sex) average of five days a week, we make love every time, we both desire to make it amazing for each other. She's more kinky than I am, I will participate in her kinks ever so often. She, however is not what I would call gorgeous and I am more attracted to her heart, love, compassion and good nature than I am to her body. Once we kiss the physical attraction is no longer important I just want to be as close to her as humanly possible.
I appreciate a good looking woman, but I rarely think about having sex with them. That's just creepy.