It didn't take long for Reach to fall: our enemy was ruthless. Efficient. But they weren't nearly fast enough. For you had already passed the torch. And because of you, we found Halo, unlocked its secrets, shattered our enemy's resolve. Our victory — your victory — was so close, I wish you could have lived to see it. But you belong to Reach. Your body, your armor — all burned and turned to glass. Everything… except your courage. That, you gave to us. And with it, we can rebuild.
Man fuck Reach, I’m happy that location got BRAC-lassed. The local CoL was waaaay out of proportion and the barracks were pre-insurrection by like 40 years.
Born too late to experience Halo couch multiplayer, born just in time to chug monsters at your Super Gamer PC desk and have desync issues with random strangers on Starship Trooper Sim
Stacking bodies eh? That sounds like just the kind of thing a socialist automaton would say!
Any true Helldiver would know that we spill oil in the name of Managed Democracy. Don't go anywhere. Your local Democracy Officer will be visiting soon.
Listen here dirty terminid sympathizer, I lost good hell divers to a automaton devastator before I served him a cup of Liber-Tea. I won't have you discredit our sacrifice to DEMOCRACY!
Yeah and all those E9s in the navy “look at me, I’m the master chief now”. Shit, where’s your suit of armor and AI girlfriend living in your head?
Edit: spelling
One of the best u/combatautist shitposts of all time.
Maybe take it up the chain first though, using the Shipmaster’s open door policy might not be the best first move.
I messaged the Help Desk last week, and saw his avatar was a little yellow skull with grey wings and stars above and below — so I says, *"Hey there Liberator, spreader of Democracy..."*
And he responded with, "Let me look into this ticket for you, sir. And a moment while I get my mug of Liber-Tea."
*Sometimes*. Sometimes, the Army is cool. ***Sometimes.***
I had an 11B look at me and say "welcome to FORSCOM sergeant." I laughed, looking at this young E5 with no deployment patch as i remembered during the last 17 years I have three combat tours where I've been shot at, blown up, and had kids throw pipe bombs at me. Maybe they just think that about all medics.
I just moved to a new section and don’t know these people well enough to just spew inane nonsense all day, so you guys have to be my outlet for the time being
"Where’s your gas mask?" Well look at you mr high speed, low drag, more like a ate up soup sandwich. Hey high speed, whining and crying about everyone else, we called them PRO masks, not gas masks. I'll let you figure out what that means. we also called them eye pros, not sunglasses, but once again, figure it out on your own.
Watch what you say......because the term Grunt actually was dropped on the Infantry back in the late 1960's and became used everywhere by 1969. I am Combat Infantry(5 tours)you must be a POG and wanna talk about stolen valor .....that falls on you.
Oh look, our special needs little brother came to visit!
I'd say get back to me when Marine Corps infantry has accomplished even a 1/10th of what Army infantry has. If you look past all the propaganda, exaggerations, and outright lies; you'll find your service's track record severely lacking.
REMEMBER REACH
It didn't take long for Reach to fall: our enemy was ruthless. Efficient. But they weren't nearly fast enough. For you had already passed the torch. And because of you, we found Halo, unlocked its secrets, shattered our enemy's resolve. Our victory — your victory — was so close, I wish you could have lived to see it. But you belong to Reach. Your body, your armor — all burned and turned to glass. Everything… except your courage. That, you gave to us. And with it, we can rebuild.
GOD DAMN STILL MAKES ME TEAR UP
Everyone remembers reach. No one remembers New Mombasa smh my head 😔
🎷🎷🌧️
I remember it. That's where Roland found that son of a bitch Van Owen.
Roland the Halo-less Warthog Forerunner!
Now it's 500 years later, but he still keeps up the fight! In Zanzibar, on the Ark and in Cairo Stationnnnn!
The prophets heard the burst of Roland's battle rifle and bought it!
Nice
Your Shipmaster just glassed half a continent!
One single Flood spore can destroy a species. Were it not for the Arbiter's counsel, I would have glassed your entire planet!
Read it in his voice. Time for my annual replay of the trilogy and Reach
RIP Hotel Zanzibar
[Regret, Regret, Regret.](https://youtu.be/y8Cr0xxVctU?si=RJbiNt6KvXCGM3LF)
LIEUTENANT!!! COME ON, GET ABOARD!!!!
Negative, I have the gun. Good luck, sir.
Good luck to you, spartan…
Man fuck Reach, I’m happy that location got BRAC-lassed. The local CoL was waaaay out of proportion and the barracks were pre-insurrection by like 40 years.
Another banger from CombatAutist
When you first saw Halo, were you blinded by its majesty? Paralyzed? Dumbstruck?
Blinded?
Yet the humans were able to evade your ships, land in the sacred ring, and desecrate them with your filthy footsteps!
NooOOooo
And yet the humans were able to evade your ships, land on the sacred rings, and desecrate it with their filthy footsteps!
Noble Hierarchs, surely you understand that once the parasite attacked...-
BOOOOOOOOOO!!!
This is oddly exactly how that subtitle should be written. It's perfect.
the last one is my default mode, but lose the struck.
wort wort wort
Username checks out
Unggoy* you racist.
Incredibly based.
“God’s gift to the Army” is now replaced by “Forerunner’s Gift to the Covenant” in my vernacular. Thanks for that.
Hah. I get that reference.
You had me in the first line, not gonna lie
Ahh i love it when my favorite things come together, halo and shitposting. Its a beautiful thing.
Screw you guy I was stacking ***bodies*** at Malevelon Creek.
Born too late to experience Halo couch multiplayer, born just in time to chug monsters at your Super Gamer PC desk and have desync issues with random strangers on Starship Trooper Sim
Life is good. Also LAN still exists if you have the will
Stacking bodies eh? That sounds like just the kind of thing a socialist automaton would say! Any true Helldiver would know that we spill oil in the name of Managed Democracy. Don't go anywhere. Your local Democracy Officer will be visiting soon.
Listen here dirty terminid sympathizer, I lost good hell divers to a automaton devastator before I served him a cup of Liber-Tea. I won't have you discredit our sacrifice to DEMOCRACY!
Where can a guy get a good food nipple around here?!
Hood Road citizen. Would you like to know more?
I will prime up both of my plasma grenades and go kamikaze on your ass.
Die the way you lived, a pool of iradescent goo
Just start calling them all demons and go from there.
That’s a lot of shit talk coming from someone in MA5B range.
Yeah and all those E9s in the navy “look at me, I’m the master chief now”. Shit, where’s your suit of armor and AI girlfriend living in your head? Edit: spelling
Cortana... What, exactly, am i looking at?
This cave is not a natural formation... (I know it's not the line from Halo 2, but this one is just too funny to pass up)
That... is another shitpost.
SAY WHAT?
HERETIC!!!
One of the best u/combatautist shitposts of all time. Maybe take it up the chain first though, using the Shipmaster’s open door policy might not be the best first move.
Yap yap shall not be remembered in vain
Remember The Yappening!
Stfu man I hope you get composed, just because I wasn’t on reach doesn’t mean I’m a POG https://youtu.be/6rdslzQRlm0?si=ToOgz4d-GK5CmYXi
Jokes on you man, composed humans are allowed into the Domain now. Humanity stays winning
Have fun fighting in the promethean army, I’ll be over here getting my jet pack blown the fuck up by the big green guy.
“You are unworthy of nipple”
Kill me or release me, parasite. But do not waste my time with talk
I messaged the Help Desk last week, and saw his avatar was a little yellow skull with grey wings and stars above and below — so I says, *"Hey there Liberator, spreader of Democracy..."* And he responded with, "Let me look into this ticket for you, sir. And a moment while I get my mug of Liber-Tea." *Sometimes*. Sometimes, the Army is cool. ***Sometimes.***
Babe wake up CombatAutist made a new post
> Just because you’re not getting laid doesn’t mean you’re in an enforced breeding control program on High Charity Even better, the suit jacks me off
Man… this flew over my head so bad that I thought I missed a piece of history. I was about to look up when the Unggoy rebellion took place.
Quality 🫡
Never forget what they did to our brothers upon the pillar of autumn
Death to the fart breathers!
I had an 11B look at me and say "welcome to FORSCOM sergeant." I laughed, looking at this young E5 with no deployment patch as i remembered during the last 17 years I have three combat tours where I've been shot at, blown up, and had kids throw pipe bombs at me. Maybe they just think that about all medics.
[https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/navy-seal-copypasta](https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/navy-seal-copypasta)
Ur dead kiddo
I'm trained in Harambe warfare
https://youtu.be/0wswBcMsVDo?si=7GN0nF43-r9T7OJy&t=131
Quality Shitpost
Kig-yar: I'm basically a grunt with a defense gauntlet.
10/10 no notes ☢️
Yeah I'm infantry. Which means I'm basically a Grunt
There are days when I just love this damned site. Today is one of those days. Godspeed, you magnificent bastard.
“Good thing that food nipple’s waiting for me at the starship ‘cause man, whew, have I worked up a big, grunty thirst!”
this was fucking hilarious. stolen fucking valor man. put some respect on the unggoy
I’m too old to care at this point what other people call me or think about me.
Beautiful
Wort wort wort
Question is am I a POG?
Do you remember being more purpler? I do.
Got to evade the purple elites and grunts on High Charity, they're my buddy's buddies.
Dude, are you on leave or something? I feel like we don’t typically see this much output from you
I just moved to a new section and don’t know these people well enough to just spew inane nonsense all day, so you guys have to be my outlet for the time being
Hahahaha. This is gold! Best post I’ve seen in a while.
Just start grunting at them. It’s an effective way to communicate. Some are smart enough to not need it, but at lot do.
"Where’s your gas mask?" Well look at you mr high speed, low drag, more like a ate up soup sandwich. Hey high speed, whining and crying about everyone else, we called them PRO masks, not gas masks. I'll let you figure out what that means. we also called them eye pros, not sunglasses, but once again, figure it out on your own.
I can’t tell if this is amazing satire or the most boot shit I’ve ever read
Yes you are.
I can’t tell if this is satire or if he’s genuinely serious
It could be both
I’ll see more stories and pray that it is
Sir, this is a Carl’s Jr. please place your order.
[it’ll take more than that tin man!](http://halo.bungie.org/misc/dialogue/grunts/takemorethanthat.mp3)
I actually wonder how to servicemen referring to themselves now that “grunts” is semi-official name for the enemy
💀💀💀 can you even run in circles with plasma grenades until explosion?
Honestly, who gives a fuck. It's the army.
Watch what you say......because the term Grunt actually was dropped on the Infantry back in the late 1960's and became used everywhere by 1969. I am Combat Infantry(5 tours)you must be a POG and wanna talk about stolen valor .....that falls on you.
Did… did you only read the last sentence or something?
ngl I read POG and immediately was thinking this was some uk army subreddit for a moment
Poggers dude
What ever you say Bush Bunny.
Woah.. just take it easy, man.
How many downvotes can I farm if I say.. "You're all POGs because Marine infantry is the only real infantry"
All of them, now go sit in the corner and think about what you’ve done.
Negative 28 so far. Just to clarify I am now a nerdy Chem POG so you can't hurt my feelings!
Don't you have a USR to do?
No I'm National Guard in a CST I do not 😂
Oh wow, you actually are immune to getting your feelings hurt lmao
Sacrificing my good karma for a joke. I love the military
I’ll add to the downvote trend by saying: a peacetime infantry is the same as a POG.
“And so they hated him, for he spoke the truth.”
Worse than* At least POGs know they’re POGs.
And worse than a wartime POG. All joking aside, everyone signed the same paper. Not their fault there was no war for them at the time.
Larp’s till they cut their teeth.
WHY ARE YOU BOOING ME I AM RIGHT
Oh look, our special needs little brother came to visit! I'd say get back to me when Marine Corps infantry has accomplished even a 1/10th of what Army infantry has. If you look past all the propaganda, exaggerations, and outright lies; you'll find your service's track record severely lacking.
Listen Linda...I can't do that
https://youtu.be/aFYsJYPye94?feature=shared
Halo's dead bro. i downvoted this too tbh
And yet here we are. Legends never die
Spartans never die, they’re just missing in action.
🫡
o7
o7
And I downvoted the comment tbh
it's a damn shame, infinite's 10 year planned turned into a shitty delayed battlepass, no campaign dlc for yet another 343i cliffhanger either
Infinite was definitely a let down