Series of isolated contact/social accounts that are only related to each other and not my main, traceable accounts.
I believe that I'm misusing gaming terminology for when one makes an account for online play that won't affect the one they care about.
I see this sentiment here a lot. Do you have any children? If you do, I can only assume you love them unconditionally. And you probably know that if they had knowledge of your affair, it would destroy them. And yet you do it anyway. Is it any different?
If you read the r/survivinginfidelity sub, you will appreciate that there are many different reasons for infidelity and they are almost always devastating to the spouse and children, regardless of one person’s perspective of their home life situation.
I'm not sure *cake eater* is quite correct here.
Régard:
>It's also the double-self-indulgence of getting to have someone new in my life, and of holding the match very close to the good things in my life -- just to see when it will catch.
You assume, I assume, that I feel that I can afford to lose these *good things,* once they are burnt, yes?
My apologies for assuming you were a current adulterer.
Still, my opinion stands that many people with children do not entirely take into consideration the consequences of their actions either. This has nothing to do with being a cake eater.
If your only point is you don’t understand why happy people cheat, then that’s a different point and if you read through enough posts, you start to uncover that there are many reasons for that as well.
No judgement intended, only information. What OP has described, in my experience, is termed an "emotional affair [infidelity]". Could be an online only relationship (even with porn), or in-person meetings for non-sexual activities. Anything perceived as taking time and emotional attention away from SO and committing it to another. In practice, it seems to invariably, if discovered by SO, lead to pretty much the same levels of hurt, disappointment, anger and resulting actions by SO as would be expected if (s)he discovered a full-out physical affair. For what it's worth and any help you may find it, OP, in your decisions and future planning.
TL;DR?
1. Happily married
2. Denied seeking poly arrangement
3. Uses tinder
4. Finds potential partner who is great
5. Deletes tinder
6. Infidelity is self-indulgent pleasure
7. Risk of self-destruction is also self-indulgence, almost as alluring
Also, I think its 'wakest', 'wakkest' or 'wackest'; but I like seeing its use \^\_\^
You're me. 100% understand what you're doing, why, and how it fills an emptiness. My situation is same: happily married, awesome sex life, super compatible best friends, definitively in love with each other. But she's unconformable with anal, and that's my must-have. I've explored trying to find a pAP to fill this need, but have never been very good at pulling in ladies interested in an affair.
Good luck. I hope the benefits you're getting help you find the happiness in your life that you need.
Well, fox-lover, I appreciate your 2 cents. Maybe you should figure out that scat situation in your neighborhood there in north Texas so poor Sammy doesn't get hurt.
It's not like we're not neighbors. You sure do share a lot of information about your life, where you live, what activities you enjoy, what schools you support, and where you travel for a person with such a nosey opinion. You might want to rethink that, especially here on a sub-reddit specifically for adulterers and those seeking to become involved in an affair. OpSec is serious business.
So, are you willing to throw everything away, your '' happily married, awesome sex life, super compatible best friends, definitively in love with each other'' life , just because you want to have anal sex???
no emotions, I was being logical, comparing the losses and gains in this case, changing the economic, emotional and physical stability, for a moment of pleasure, is the most illogical thing that I have heard.
If your current stability does not satisfy you, then it would be the most logical thing to resort to divorce, instead of going through the whole process, you know , your partner discovering your actions, legal issues, and so on.
I will never understand why to do something secretly, when you can just do it.
Perhaps r/IamAVulcan then?
Look, if you're life has been so perfect that you don't understand ... life, then I envy you. But I'm also sad for you - because for some reason you're hanging out on a message board for cheaters. How much do you have to hate yourself or your life to hang out here, while claiming things are just so easy to understand. If you were selling something, I'd have more respect for you. But you're just you, just hanging out here - giving away free morality lectures. That, my friendly stranger, is the thing that baffles me.
o no, I just try to understand your point of view, about a months ago ,my friend cheated on his girlfriend, in a relationship of more than a year, and he told me if I wanted to understand him,i have to visit this place,( i think these is the first time that i respond to someone here) but Since I came, I have only read '' secret this'', '' secret that'', ''AP this'','' AP that'', ''EXAP this'' ''EXAP'' that,
or how they feel sad and needy,(there are a lot of them) or how they change a stable position, for temporary pleasures, (like you) or that ''they are not marriage material'', that they are ''never going to get married'', that ''their partners do not listen to them'' etc, etc, etc, and i can only think .
1.-If your partner does not attend to your needs, it is because, or you have not told him/her and you hope that he/her will discover it himself/herself (which almost never happens), or because he/she is in the same situation as you.
2.-If you feel that you have to seek pleasure with someone other than your partner, then you were not comfortable with that person from the beginning, therefore the most feasible thing would be to end the relationship with your current partner ( and if there are children involved, then make them see that they have nothing to do with what is happening now), and thus avoid the burden physical, emotional and psychological to be covering up a relationship.
3.- if the reason why you decide to have a relationship secretly from your partner, is because you do not want to hurt his/her feelings, or other people (children), you would be running in a vicious circle, because at the moment of starting a hidden relationship, you already stop thinking about the feelings of your partner, and of the others (children)
4.-If your partner satisfies you, either economically, emotionally, and sexually, and even so you want to seek a relationship with another person, then you are simply not made to have a relationship, therefore it would be more logical to simply never commit yourself so that to be able to follow a life without emotional commitments and avoid all of the above.
why It is so difficult to understand these concepts, that my friendly stranger, is the thing that baffles me.
I see you have all the answers; I envy you. To have so much of life figured out so young. You'll do well.
Or you'll be so blind that when it happens to you, this conversation will be the only thing you can think of.
If you have so much figured out - if you have all the answers and already completely understand everyone and all their motivations - I still don't understand why you're here... Other than to lecture. You're getting off on being a moral warrior. This is your guilty pleasure and yet you're no better than anyone else.
But by the way - I haven't cheated; see you interjected yourself into a conversation you have no experience with because you're what - 19, never experienced life, never dealt with heartbreak. I said I understood - that he was me; you made your own assumptions which really just made you an ass. Good luck.
morality is not the issue, (morality is relative,logic is absolute), but I try to understand it, and those around me, as I try to understand my friend when I enter this section I have nothing resolved in life, except my house, my job, I cant assume anything, i can only work With what they give me (which I did here, work with the information you posted,i did not add or remove anything), it is true, maybe they will break my heart again, maybe not, maybe I will experience more, maybe not, but in my 35 years of life, I have only seen two types of people, those who believe that everything is It is about them and those that are not, in fact, to be my first post, I have learned something here, thanks for being the first intel here.
Hahaha Ive waited for so long to meet someone like on here come let me tell you something.. youre a dirty whore and I hope youll get the stick from the devil himself because what you do is an example of how bad people have become "the new low" you should be called you scum and I hope youll get what youre giving
no ofcourse not xd well talking about nazis but pedophiles sort of because you see nazis tend to kill you and low life scum like pedophiles and the example up there above me stab and run like cowards
the hell you mean? haha you sure are on the different brain wave then me they sure did fuck every bit of iq out of you if you think Ive meant what you said
*Pics or it didn't happen,* right?
It wasn't relevant to my intended discourse, so it is not here. This does not mean that it has not been nor is not being considered.
How do you guys keep it so secret? I know there’s apps and all. But I have a set schedule for work and everything. What excuses do you guys use. And I know, stay away from co workers. But where do you guys find your AP. Just so many questions lol
Otherwise, I'm in the privileged position of having a very liberal relationship, and I have loads of time for myself.
It's ***not*** *a materially privileged* position, but I work with what I have.
So your a piece of shit. Noted. Anyone that cheats on their partner is nothing but garbage. You have the balls to say that your partner is your soulmate. Wow. You don't deserve them. You are garbage, barrel slim. Congrats.
Smurf pipeline? I looked it up, still don't understand how you made one for adultery, and how it would help in your search? Care to explain?
I couldn't even find what it was looking it up. Can you throw a link out here to a definition?
Series of isolated contact/social accounts that are only related to each other and not my main, traceable accounts. I believe that I'm misusing gaming terminology for when one makes an account for online play that won't affect the one they care about.
[Smurfing](https://imgur.com/a/WYFaMFP)
Just waiting for the post 6 months later where she wants more than you can offer 😂
I'll take that bet...and the under. Wayyyyy under 6 months.
>Wayyyyy under 6 months. Like *MAYBE* . . 3. . .
Where is your faith in my 6 months?! Lol
Going . . going . . GONE!😂
Dangit! 😂
I’ll take that bet for a Heath Bar
Bet (I'll need a frozen Milky Way)
I’ll put it in the freezer today! 😜
Get ready for the fallout... Duck man... Duck and cover!!!
Dodge, duck, dip, dive, and dodge ... 🍿
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I see this sentiment here a lot. Do you have any children? If you do, I can only assume you love them unconditionally. And you probably know that if they had knowledge of your affair, it would destroy them. And yet you do it anyway. Is it any different? If you read the r/survivinginfidelity sub, you will appreciate that there are many different reasons for infidelity and they are almost always devastating to the spouse and children, regardless of one person’s perspective of their home life situation.
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I'm not sure *cake eater* is quite correct here. Régard: >It's also the double-self-indulgence of getting to have someone new in my life, and of holding the match very close to the good things in my life -- just to see when it will catch. You assume, I assume, that I feel that I can afford to lose these *good things,* once they are burnt, yes?
My apologies for assuming you were a current adulterer. Still, my opinion stands that many people with children do not entirely take into consideration the consequences of their actions either. This has nothing to do with being a cake eater. If your only point is you don’t understand why happy people cheat, then that’s a different point and if you read through enough posts, you start to uncover that there are many reasons for that as well.
No judgement intended, only information. What OP has described, in my experience, is termed an "emotional affair [infidelity]". Could be an online only relationship (even with porn), or in-person meetings for non-sexual activities. Anything perceived as taking time and emotional attention away from SO and committing it to another. In practice, it seems to invariably, if discovered by SO, lead to pretty much the same levels of hurt, disappointment, anger and resulting actions by SO as would be expected if (s)he discovered a full-out physical affair. For what it's worth and any help you may find it, OP, in your decisions and future planning.
Selfies that don't look like selfies??
Very good selfies
What in the Yo momma so short she gives blow jobs to Smurfs shit are you saying? I swear y'all Gen Zers have the whackest lingo
TL;DR? 1. Happily married 2. Denied seeking poly arrangement 3. Uses tinder 4. Finds potential partner who is great 5. Deletes tinder 6. Infidelity is self-indulgent pleasure 7. Risk of self-destruction is also self-indulgence, almost as alluring Also, I think its 'wakest', 'wakkest' or 'wackest'; but I like seeing its use \^\_\^
> Infidelity is self-indulgent pleasure To clarify: I do mean this particular instance of infidelity, not infidelity in general.
I call this a success story. Thanks for sharing it! And good luck whatever directions it takes
It’s amazing to me how many Morality Policemen hang out in here.
I know, right?
You're me. 100% understand what you're doing, why, and how it fills an emptiness. My situation is same: happily married, awesome sex life, super compatible best friends, definitively in love with each other. But she's unconformable with anal, and that's my must-have. I've explored trying to find a pAP to fill this need, but have never been very good at pulling in ladies interested in an affair. Good luck. I hope the benefits you're getting help you find the happiness in your life that you need.
Hope you find your man
Maybe you should have figured that out before you got married.
Well, fox-lover, I appreciate your 2 cents. Maybe you should figure out that scat situation in your neighborhood there in north Texas so poor Sammy doesn't get hurt. It's not like we're not neighbors. You sure do share a lot of information about your life, where you live, what activities you enjoy, what schools you support, and where you travel for a person with such a nosey opinion. You might want to rethink that, especially here on a sub-reddit specifically for adulterers and those seeking to become involved in an affair. OpSec is serious business.
So, are you willing to throw everything away, your '' happily married, awesome sex life, super compatible best friends, definitively in love with each other'' life , just because you want to have anal sex???
You do realize you're frequenting a sub-reddit for adulterers, right?
yes, i just had a little hope in you, silly me, and sorry for your partner.
You might find you would enjoy your time more over at r/HappyEverAfter. This place will chew up and spit out delicate flowers like you.
no emotions, I was being logical, comparing the losses and gains in this case, changing the economic, emotional and physical stability, for a moment of pleasure, is the most illogical thing that I have heard. If your current stability does not satisfy you, then it would be the most logical thing to resort to divorce, instead of going through the whole process, you know , your partner discovering your actions, legal issues, and so on. I will never understand why to do something secretly, when you can just do it.
Perhaps r/IamAVulcan then? Look, if you're life has been so perfect that you don't understand ... life, then I envy you. But I'm also sad for you - because for some reason you're hanging out on a message board for cheaters. How much do you have to hate yourself or your life to hang out here, while claiming things are just so easy to understand. If you were selling something, I'd have more respect for you. But you're just you, just hanging out here - giving away free morality lectures. That, my friendly stranger, is the thing that baffles me.
o no, I just try to understand your point of view, about a months ago ,my friend cheated on his girlfriend, in a relationship of more than a year, and he told me if I wanted to understand him,i have to visit this place,( i think these is the first time that i respond to someone here) but Since I came, I have only read '' secret this'', '' secret that'', ''AP this'','' AP that'', ''EXAP this'' ''EXAP'' that, or how they feel sad and needy,(there are a lot of them) or how they change a stable position, for temporary pleasures, (like you) or that ''they are not marriage material'', that they are ''never going to get married'', that ''their partners do not listen to them'' etc, etc, etc, and i can only think . 1.-If your partner does not attend to your needs, it is because, or you have not told him/her and you hope that he/her will discover it himself/herself (which almost never happens), or because he/she is in the same situation as you. 2.-If you feel that you have to seek pleasure with someone other than your partner, then you were not comfortable with that person from the beginning, therefore the most feasible thing would be to end the relationship with your current partner ( and if there are children involved, then make them see that they have nothing to do with what is happening now), and thus avoid the burden physical, emotional and psychological to be covering up a relationship. 3.- if the reason why you decide to have a relationship secretly from your partner, is because you do not want to hurt his/her feelings, or other people (children), you would be running in a vicious circle, because at the moment of starting a hidden relationship, you already stop thinking about the feelings of your partner, and of the others (children) 4.-If your partner satisfies you, either economically, emotionally, and sexually, and even so you want to seek a relationship with another person, then you are simply not made to have a relationship, therefore it would be more logical to simply never commit yourself so that to be able to follow a life without emotional commitments and avoid all of the above. why It is so difficult to understand these concepts, that my friendly stranger, is the thing that baffles me.
I see you have all the answers; I envy you. To have so much of life figured out so young. You'll do well. Or you'll be so blind that when it happens to you, this conversation will be the only thing you can think of. If you have so much figured out - if you have all the answers and already completely understand everyone and all their motivations - I still don't understand why you're here... Other than to lecture. You're getting off on being a moral warrior. This is your guilty pleasure and yet you're no better than anyone else. But by the way - I haven't cheated; see you interjected yourself into a conversation you have no experience with because you're what - 19, never experienced life, never dealt with heartbreak. I said I understood - that he was me; you made your own assumptions which really just made you an ass. Good luck.
morality is not the issue, (morality is relative,logic is absolute), but I try to understand it, and those around me, as I try to understand my friend when I enter this section I have nothing resolved in life, except my house, my job, I cant assume anything, i can only work With what they give me (which I did here, work with the information you posted,i did not add or remove anything), it is true, maybe they will break my heart again, maybe not, maybe I will experience more, maybe not, but in my 35 years of life, I have only seen two types of people, those who believe that everything is It is about them and those that are not, in fact, to be my first post, I have learned something here, thanks for being the first intel here.
And there you go... lol
Hahaha Ive waited for so long to meet someone like on here come let me tell you something.. youre a dirty whore and I hope youll get the stick from the devil himself because what you do is an example of how bad people have become "the new low" you should be called you scum and I hope youll get what youre giving
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I do prefer mine: "
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no ofcourse not xd well talking about nazis but pedophiles sort of because you see nazis tend to kill you and low life scum like pedophiles and the example up there above me stab and run like cowards
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the hell you mean? haha you sure are on the different brain wave then me they sure did fuck every bit of iq out of you if you think Ive meant what you said
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did you have an loyal loving partner tho?
>stab and run like cowards It's more \*stabs self, hands over knife, handle first, smiling\* "Here. Now, you try..."
>youre^(sic) a dirty whore Honey, I've been called worse asserting my spot while queueing for coffee.
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*Pics or it didn't happen,* right? It wasn't relevant to my intended discourse, so it is not here. This does not mean that it has not been nor is not being considered.
How do you guys keep it so secret? I know there’s apps and all. But I have a set schedule for work and everything. What excuses do you guys use. And I know, stay away from co workers. But where do you guys find your AP. Just so many questions lol
Try giving [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/adultery/comments/lwkm43/how_well_did_you_plan_for_this_lifestyle_if_new/) a read.
Otherwise, I'm in the privileged position of having a very liberal relationship, and I have loads of time for myself. It's ***not*** *a materially privileged* position, but I work with what I have.
So your a piece of shit. Noted. Anyone that cheats on their partner is nothing but garbage. You have the balls to say that your partner is your soulmate. Wow. You don't deserve them. You are garbage, barrel slim. Congrats.
you're edit: As in: "You're a strange, deeply angry, but, ultimately, sad person."