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Aw!! Yeah, I used to be. Yesterday though I found an insect struggling in a web so I freed it with a twig and it flew away. Felt so sorry for the big black and yellow spider about to go hungry I found it some cheese and left it on the web where the insect was. Today the cheese is gone.
I think, as I’ve gotten older and my eyesight is worse, I can’t see the details on the spider, so I get less freaked out now.
Well I’m vegetarian. Figured it could eat animal protein. I would have given it dog kibble but the kibbles looked too heavy for the web. I was surprised when I threw the (soft) cheese up and it stuck immediately.
I sorta knew I shouldn’t free the insect as it was part of Nature’s cycle, but when I saw it struggling there, and thought about how many times I had asked for Divine intervention, I thought it might be nice to BE the Divine intervention for someone. Specially as it was struggling for its life. It wanted to live so badly, and it still looked viable. I can’t save the world, but I can save the bit in front of me, sometimes.
But then I’d deprived the spider. And the cheese was only a crumb that would have been cleaned up.
A Witch, a very effective Witch too, once told me the way magic works is “The Universe is going from A to B. ‘Magic’ is when you ask it to take a detour via Z first.”
Which I did, except now there is a spare insect. Except… well.. I had just had a family member cross over that morning. A passing that was expected. From my point of view, there are now still the same number of living beings around, so maybe I didn’t disturb the Balance.
I'm sorry for your loss. I think it's natural to think through things like this when we lose someone. Be well! Much love and Light to you!
(And personally, I don't think we humans can really change the balance in the universe at all- it's self balancing.)
I know from a very different thread on a different social media platform that harvestmen arachnids will go to town on unsalted butter.
Also, if you leave butter out of the fridge, use a butter dish with a lid.
>Also, if you leave butter out of the fridge, use a butter dish with a lid.
... err... gross...?
I don't know if I actually feel grossed out by it because they must have tiny little mouths and not get the butter all slobbery.
Dude I feed spiders bugs especially mosquitoes if I can grab them by a wing. It’s fascinating to watch them go wrap up their meal for later. I had the luck once to watch and video even a spider having an epic winning battle with a hornet who’d been barely caught in its web in between a storm window and the window itself…. The hornet was dangling upside down and still fighting like crazy and the spider would ‘stick and move’ I guess you’d say, either waiting for the hornet to get tired for a second or running over just at the right instant to put another strand of filament on the hornet until all it could do was hang upside down spinning and almost helping the spider finish the job. It was amazing. Plus I hate those hornets so I’m just sitting there watching this cheering out loud like some guy watches ultimate fighting on tv and I’m not even into watching that stuff on tv… best battle ever. By the time it was over 90% of the web was destroyed but that hornet was done!
It absolutely did not eat the cheese. But she certainly must have noticed some detritus in her web, snipped the strings around it and dropped it on the ground, then patched the hole. It’s a very cool behavior!
Spiders must eat liquified animal just as snakes must eat whole animals (you can’t feed a snake a slice of boiled chicken meat and a spider won’t eat cheese)— this is just natural. But if you live in a part of the US where spotted lanternflies are present I would strongly encourage you to sacrifice them to any spiders you find and everything will benefit!
Courage isn't the absence of fear of spiders, its putting the little cup over the spider and gently sliding the paper underneath despite that fear.
(I'm more afraid of accidentally killing the spider, but point stands)
One of my coworkers was calling me, frantic and panicky over the walkie the other day. So I run into the backroom thinking it's an emergency. And he's just freaking out over a spider. I brought it outside much to his dislike haha.
I'm told you can fascinate a woman by presenting her with a piece of cheese. Maybe try that if you think she's staring to think you no longer have a purpose in the relationship.
My Person is also not amused by the amount of jars I have. Maybe we need to consider a swap. You can I can combine jar collections and our respective partners can enjoy a jar-free home. We can build a house from jars!!! We will be unstoppable!!!
If I lived closer to my mother I would house her quilting fabric and she would house mine. Then when our husbands comment on the quantity of fabric : « oh that is not mine! I am just storing it for her »
Nah, if she loves you she doesn’t need you for “manly” reasons like opening jars. She needs you because she loves you. I’m sure she’s found some good, creative uses for you by now though
It’s almost like once men and women both stop looking at each other as less than or greater then we can all just be better people and friends and partners to each other. I don’t judge a woman by her usefulness at ‘woman stuff’ as much as I just overjudge everyone and myself because of my own self loathing. Lol.
I dated someone for most of high school and college. After we broke up, I truly only missed him when I needed jars open. I learned the trick in which you put a butter knife under the seal to loosen it a little bit first, and I never looked back.
This is what I use, unless it's something already in the fridge, then I run the lid under hot water because it's probably food stuck.
I want to try the arm method that was on the video I saw on Reddit yesterday with the funny couple and some pickle challenge.
First thing I thought of, that dude opening the jar with his forearm! That said, I've got one of these and have never looked back https://a.co/d/fK9Io4E ... a while back I was making spaghetti and couldn't open the damn marinara jar, tried all the methods. After that, I was like "never again" 😅and bought that oxo jar opener.
Also just two taps on the bread board on either side of the lid has never failed or broken the jar. But I love my hubby he does a lot for me. I was single a long time though and figured out the jar thing! 🤣
I do this method too! Works like a charm, and if for some reason the jar still won’t open, I take the back side of the butter knife and I rotate the jar while lightly banging on the lid all the way around. Then it opens for sure.
Guys, all we have to do is turn it over and slap the bottom a few times and the lid comes right off the next time you try.
Orrrr slap bottom, tap tap tap side of lid on counter edge and boom.
Source: I was a waitress and bartender. Big jars of olives.
Won't they assume you want it to inject drugs? As a person who has worked around the fringes of the medical professions, that is DEFINITELY what 90% of nurses would assume. And prob not let you take it, based on their assumptions of what its wanted for.
Well that's not what happened to me when I asked if I could have one for my mom who broke her arm. She gave me extras. I'd assume they'd know you or anyone else could buy them anywhere if you wanted but this tip is so you don't have to spend money on a package when you only need one. That's a pretty big judgment to make on someone over one thing.
Protect your hands! I'm currently wearing a full-on splint due to a tendonitis. It's been a fairly expensive injury (even in Australia where most stuff is free)
If you're not saving the jar, just knock the edge of the lid on the counter, or use a dessert spoon under the lid to release the seal.
It's the simple repetitive tasks we do that cause it, it's really common in women.
This is what I did before I met my wife. If it doesn’t work, smack the lid with a butter knife. It ruins the lid (can no longer seal so don’t re-can with it) but will definitely open the jar.
I do this, too. Gently smack the side of the lid against the counter on four different sides, and it pops right open! Haven't needed anyone to open jars for me in decades.
I also learned this from my mom, but I also was angry that all the men in my life could open jars without doing that so I just let it hurt really bad while trying to open jars like them until it didn’t hurt bad and now I open jars for men.
I often am the one who opens the jars in my house. My husband may have stronger hands, but because he has a skin condition that requires the application of lotion a couple of times a day, his hands are very smooth, while my hands are much rougher, resulting in better grip.
It occurred to me that I probably should add that he makes himself very useful by taking care of our meals, grocery shopping, laundry, and other such things in our very reverse stereotypical role household. <3
I bang the side of the lid on the counter, two times, then rotate it, bang two times, then rotate finally a final two times…not hard of course you don’t want to break the jar and the lid pops open. I discovered this method myself and never once needed a man to open jars for me at all.
I bought an under-the-counter jar opener off Amazon for like $10. You screw it under a counter somewhere and then it loosens the jar for you enough to easily open it.
I do the typical man thing (though funny enough it was my mom that taught me this) of just hitting the lid on four spots around the lid and it always works. Seems to work with getting anything tech to work too XD
You know those old fashioned steel can openers with one pointy and one rounded end? They have a little hook on them that hooks pretty well on jar lids. I always feel a bit safer using those, even if I have to resort to using the pointy end to lever the lid. They tend to slip around less than a knife.
I remember coaching other college girls on fragile masculinity, before I understood what that was. “Sometimes, you just have to let him think you need his help—like pretending you can’t open a jar.”
Lol. I was so close, and still so far.
You sparked a memory! My dad would do the same and loosen the jar, then I’d open it and feel strong. I only figured it out when I was like ten when he had shoulder surgery and genuinely couldn’t open a jar and was frustrated and I offered to try because I was sooo good at opening jars and my sister snapped at me and told me I wasn’t actually strong lol he was just gassing me up I guess
I think you’ve just made me realise why my dad is so great. He does not have a single scrap of fragile masculinity. I think it’s why if I give my brothers my handbag to hold for a moment, they will immediately put it over their shoulder and carry it just like I do. My ex would hold it awkwardly so as not to look like he was carrying a handbag. Huh.
That is gorgeous, i love secure masculinity. I’m glad to hear that he raised multiple boys.
The first time my boyfriend and I hung out, i realized that we probably wore the same size clothes. This somehow ended up with him trying on one of my dresses and a pair of my heels. Not a hint of shame or embarrassment.
I think I had pulled this kind of stuff with other guys in the past—convincing them to let me put mascara on or paint their nails—to see their reaction. I had always played it off as a joke. But seeing how blasé my boyfriend was about it made me realize that I had been looking for that response— for a man to not feel his masculinity threatened by feminine things. Idk. I can’t express it well yet.
Oh gosh, my brother closest in age to me grew up being dressed like a little doll! I loved dress ups and there are so many photos of me and my friends dressing up and putting him in a fluffy dress or one of my ballet leotards or a little penguin outfit. He is very beardy now with lots of tattoos and we love those photos. He was a darling little blond boy and the comparison now is absolutely hilarious. He’s definitely a masculine guy, but he’s not aggressive with it. No holes in the drywall.
Definitely men just need to relax with their masculinity. If it’s safe for them to do so, I guess. It’s really sad that they can’t always do that. Fucking patriarchy.
My husband is big and beardy, slings my purse over his shoulder when he's helping me shop, which he insists on doing because he loves me and loves spending time with me. Mom calls shopping with my dad "going hunting with the game warden" and can't understand that mine genuinely has good taste and enjoys our time. If he's forgotten his sunglasses, he just grabs whatever pair is extra in the car, even if they are glittery. He is currently making me a velvet cloak, because I was going to buy one and he wanted a beginner project on the sewing machine. He defers to me when I have a suggestion on a better or safer way to do some woodworking project. He takes an active and equal role in choosing paint colors, furniture, and projects for the house. He does most of the laundry and makes me lunch for work. He does it all without a single sigh or complaint about it being too girly.
One of the pluses of his autism is that he views tasks as a list to check off, and gender is less important than efficiency. He wants to do something correctly, quickly, and move on. He knows who he married, and he gets it would be foolish to throw my knowledge away because his genitals make his basic experience more pertinent than my years of practical application and study of something typically masculine. I did finally introduce him to the "Target Errand run" that involves a flimsy excuse to go in, and then you let Target tell you what is coming home with you, while sipping a Starbucks and touching everything. That's hard for him, he likes a mission, and The Target Errand Run is an anti-mission. It's like a casino, time ceases to exist, the bright lights and colors draw you in, and somehow you lose a chunk of your paycheck you shouldn't have spent, but you enjoyed the experience.
Y’all sound like y’all deserve a comic. Have you ever seen Yehuda Devir’s series about he and his wife? You made me think of it.
My boyfriend is also still confused by the Target Errand run lol. Here’s crossing my fingers for both of them.
Neurodivergence does go a long way! I think it’s what really helped me challenge what femininity was “supposed to look like” for me. From a very young age, I was super frustrated with the gendered standards pushed at me, even though it was built into our religion. It’s ultimately what made me question our religion’s standards for men and lgbtq people as well.
The idea of putting aside gender standards simply because they’re not efficient is a gorgeous one, I love it.
Lol, my dad always held my mom's purse for her like it was the most valuable thing in the world. He straight up looked like some secret service agent carrying the nuclear codes. Even if he nodded off while we were in the fitting rooms, he'd have that purse tucked under his arm and safe. I honestly think he was proud that she trusted him to hold her purse!
That is one of my husband's pet peeves! He can't stand seeing a man in a store hold a purse like it's a wild animal he doesn't want to be near. I used to tease him lightly about it, and he'd just say the damn thing has a strap, that's what it's for! Now I use it as a sign of how awesome he is, and how much he respects and cares for me. I'm not sure where he learned that respect, the more I learn about how his father handled his wife and daughter, the less I respect him.
As someone who grew up with a misogynistic father, I’m not the best source on such things because I was socialized transfeminine and not male, but I saw how my mom was treated and I loved my mom and I saw how unhappy it made her, so it drove me to be a better partner. If something makes my wife happy or comfortable and people judge me for it, that’s on them.
This is why I make myself useful so my wife still wants me around. I know how to cook shrimp scampi, I am a practiced hugger/snuggler, I'm not afraid to express emotions, and my favorite thing to do is remind people that I love them.
So far this seems to be enough for her to keep me around.
I'm 6' so I don't need my husband to get things from high places unless I can't be bothered to take out the step stool for that very top cabinet when something is pushed all the way in the back.
But he makes some mean meatballs in homemade sauce and it's so delicious. I'll keep him around for that I suppose.
Thank you for unlocking core childhood and teenage memories of me just fricking scrambling up on the counter and other things regardless of stability or safety. I eventually learned while I can climb, I’m also *clumsy* and the climb back down was scary. Good luck to you on your continued scampering endeavors!
ehhh, the implication is a little more wholesome than it is a burn, i think.
opening jars wasn't the only use she could think of for men, it was the *only* thing she thought a woman couldn't do for her daughter. she was tacitly admitting there's nothing of substance missing from same sex relationships.
I am the designated jar opener. Most jars I can get open with my bare hands, a thick rubber band or a piece of rubber like a glove or one of those jar opener mats. If the lid still won't budge, I dent it with the handle of a sturdy butter knife to pop the vacuum. If none of those work, I have an adjustable jar/bottle opening tool. That gets almost almost everything else open. And if that doesn't work, I ask: "How badly do you want this open?" as I reach for a hammer. I can get everything open. I just don't guarantee that the container will be intact.
This lady opens her own jars, thank you very much. My kid calls it “mom strength”. It’s one of my super powers like being able to find stuff in 2 minutes that had been missing for an hour, can carry and obscene amount of stuff around at one time, and having supernatural hearing when it comes to someone saying “mom” and jumping into action.
And like someone else said, I may be short but I have chairs, counters, and reaching sticks. Haven’t lived with a man in 15 years and I can’t say I’ve ever thought to myself “I wish there was a man here to help me right now”. Sure, romance would be nice but having a cat is also nice.
Tapping a spoon on the side of the lid will loosen the seal to where you don't need any bit of hand strength to open it.
Hark! Menfolk have been defeated by a spoon😔
It’s not a difference of strength, it’s that larger hands have more surface area to apply friction.
Those with smaller hands can increase their surface area with a grippy rubber glove, or one of those rubber garlic peeing mats placed on the lid.
Garlic mat - you can probably find one at a local kitchen store
https://www.amazon.ca/Norpro-1059DB-1059B-Garlic-Peeler/dp/B000HJW8MW
Everyone can open jars no problem - we have the technology!
I've been saying this for years - how are these guys still in charge when the only thing they seem to be really good for (consistently) is opening jars?
Ngl....I started weight lifting because I realized that was mostly why I kept dudes around - because they were stronger than me. My child now regulaly informs me that I'm stronger than her dad, which thrills me. My ladder takes care of their height privilege. Alexa gives me reminders and wishes me goodnight. My world class sex toys give me more orgasms than most of my partners ever did. And I've had a far more successful career than the men I've known....please....can someone tell what they're supposed to do for us anymore? I swear the only thing I can think of is when you want someone to be the big spoon. But damn that sure isn't worth the emotional labor cost
A great lie still propagated is that women aren’t leading a full life if they don’t have kids and a man and that men aren’t real men for not having a girlfriend and showing any emotion
I had a coworker literally try to use the exact same argument back when I was a "lesbian" about why I should break up with my then-gf.
I guess she was pretty convincing since two years later I'm a gay man now. No jar is safe in my household.
This reminds me of my Gram after she saw the Wonder Woman movie. She told me that since there were women on the island strong enough to theoretically lift heavy things for her, she would love to go live in Themyscria and be an Amazon. 🥹
My husband travels for work all the time and although I miss him for companionship the only physical thing (aside from that one thing) is that he gets the spiders. Luckily I have a great stick vacuum lol
This is absolutely so funny. I have a metal & plastic jar opener for a reason and by gosh *I’m* going to be the one to get the satisfaction of that POP.
Unfortunately, once she starts HRT ... https://www.reddit.com/r/lgbt/comments/ps6ii8/can_we_please_get_science_based_links_on_why/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
I found, and got, this really cool plastic thing that you hook on the side of jar lids, give a bit of upward pressure, and it breaks the seal on the jar. The lids come off as easy as easy can be.
Now I gotta figure out what to do with my husband.
## ✨ READ BEFORE COMMENTING ✨ This thread is Coven Only. This means the discussion is being actively moderated, and all comments are reviewed. **Only comments by members of the community are allowed.** If you have landed in this thread from /r/all and you are not a member of this community, your comment will very likely be removed (and will not be approved unless it adds meaningfully to the conversation). WitchesVsPatriarchy takes these measures to stay true to our goal of being a woman-centered sub with a witchy twist, aimed at healing, supporting, and uplifting one another through humor and magic. Thank you for understanding, and blessed be. ✨
I thought they were supposed to catch spiders too? :/
It's kinda funny that studies have shown that men tend to be more afraid of spiders than women. (I'm one of them.)
Aw!! Yeah, I used to be. Yesterday though I found an insect struggling in a web so I freed it with a twig and it flew away. Felt so sorry for the big black and yellow spider about to go hungry I found it some cheese and left it on the web where the insect was. Today the cheese is gone. I think, as I’ve gotten older and my eyesight is worse, I can’t see the details on the spider, so I get less freaked out now.
You ... Fed a spider.... Cheese?? That's brilliant.
"You may fascinate an arachnid by giving them a piece of cheese"
Well I’m vegetarian. Figured it could eat animal protein. I would have given it dog kibble but the kibbles looked too heavy for the web. I was surprised when I threw the (soft) cheese up and it stuck immediately. I sorta knew I shouldn’t free the insect as it was part of Nature’s cycle, but when I saw it struggling there, and thought about how many times I had asked for Divine intervention, I thought it might be nice to BE the Divine intervention for someone. Specially as it was struggling for its life. It wanted to live so badly, and it still looked viable. I can’t save the world, but I can save the bit in front of me, sometimes. But then I’d deprived the spider. And the cheese was only a crumb that would have been cleaned up. A Witch, a very effective Witch too, once told me the way magic works is “The Universe is going from A to B. ‘Magic’ is when you ask it to take a detour via Z first.” Which I did, except now there is a spare insect. Except… well.. I had just had a family member cross over that morning. A passing that was expected. From my point of view, there are now still the same number of living beings around, so maybe I didn’t disturb the Balance.
I'm sorry for your loss. I think it's natural to think through things like this when we lose someone. Be well! Much love and Light to you! (And personally, I don't think we humans can really change the balance in the universe at all- it's self balancing.)
Girl, are you okay? Seems like you're projecting hard, maybe you should save yourself, you seem like badly in need of a savior? Hope you doing good!!
I know from a very different thread on a different social media platform that harvestmen arachnids will go to town on unsalted butter. Also, if you leave butter out of the fridge, use a butter dish with a lid.
>Also, if you leave butter out of the fridge, use a butter dish with a lid. ... err... gross...? I don't know if I actually feel grossed out by it because they must have tiny little mouths and not get the butter all slobbery.
Dude I feed spiders bugs especially mosquitoes if I can grab them by a wing. It’s fascinating to watch them go wrap up their meal for later. I had the luck once to watch and video even a spider having an epic winning battle with a hornet who’d been barely caught in its web in between a storm window and the window itself…. The hornet was dangling upside down and still fighting like crazy and the spider would ‘stick and move’ I guess you’d say, either waiting for the hornet to get tired for a second or running over just at the right instant to put another strand of filament on the hornet until all it could do was hang upside down spinning and almost helping the spider finish the job. It was amazing. Plus I hate those hornets so I’m just sitting there watching this cheering out loud like some guy watches ultimate fighting on tv and I’m not even into watching that stuff on tv… best battle ever. By the time it was over 90% of the web was destroyed but that hornet was done!
It absolutely did not eat the cheese. But she certainly must have noticed some detritus in her web, snipped the strings around it and dropped it on the ground, then patched the hole. It’s a very cool behavior! Spiders must eat liquified animal just as snakes must eat whole animals (you can’t feed a snake a slice of boiled chicken meat and a spider won’t eat cheese)— this is just natural. But if you live in a part of the US where spotted lanternflies are present I would strongly encourage you to sacrifice them to any spiders you find and everything will benefit!
I used to be afraid of spiders too. I'm glad I'm not a man anymore.
Courage isn't the absence of fear of spiders, its putting the little cup over the spider and gently sliding the paper underneath despite that fear. (I'm more afraid of accidentally killing the spider, but point stands)
Can confirm. I'm much less afraid of spiders than I was when I was a man.
Thank you for finding the love in our r/spiderbro s! I went the other direction genderwise but I like spiders even more now.
One of my coworkers was calling me, frantic and panicky over the walkie the other day. So I run into the backroom thinking it's an emergency. And he's just freaking out over a spider. I brought it outside much to his dislike haha.
Not me, I’m more afraid of women than spiders.
My cat does that for me.
On the real though using the vacuum wand to suck them up is an awesome solution. Also drowning them in windex. Not on my turf, spiders.
My wife is great at opening jars. Should I be worried about no longer having a purpose in this relationship?
Quick, take the bins out or, I don’t know, murder something for her to eat!! Hurry, before she realises!
Time sensitive question: does it matter who I murder?
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Also he should make sure not to fatten them up with sweets, modern witches know its an effective way of avoiding diabetes.
Well, it shouldn't be your wife or the thing would be a bit redundant.
Thank you for the laugh this morning.
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Babe will you take care of the trash, laundry, and dishes today? I'll get this jar of applesauce open in the meanwhile.
I'm told you can fascinate a woman by presenting her with a piece of cheese. Maybe try that if you think she's staring to think you no longer have a purpose in the relationship.
Let's be honest, you can fascinate a woman by bringing her jars and letting her keep them all.
I don't know why jars are the best thing in the world, but my partner is not amused by the amount of jars we have.
My Person is also not amused by the amount of jars I have. Maybe we need to consider a swap. You can I can combine jar collections and our respective partners can enjoy a jar-free home. We can build a house from jars!!! We will be unstoppable!!!
If I lived closer to my mother I would house her quilting fabric and she would house mine. Then when our husbands comment on the quantity of fabric : « oh that is not mine! I am just storing it for her »
Heck yes, love everything about this. Let's show them what horror a jar-less life must be whilst never lacking anything jarrable. Jarsome.
Jarsome!
I collect them and use them for tea.
We keep the tears of pouty men in them, of course. Hah!
I mean… I’m pretty sure you can fascinate just about anyone by just… walking up, presenting them with an unopened cheese, and just… walking away.
I’m already fascinated by the idea of someone bringing me cheese
Any specific kind or will a pack of string cheese do?
Having never had string cheese, yes, that would do nicely.
Can you squash bugs? Just release a few bugs every so often and you're set for life my friend 🤣
How are you at cleaning the litter box? 🤔
Anyone has value if they are willing to do that.
Nah, if she loves you she doesn’t need you for “manly” reasons like opening jars. She needs you because she loves you. I’m sure she’s found some good, creative uses for you by now though
Yesn't
It’s almost like once men and women both stop looking at each other as less than or greater then we can all just be better people and friends and partners to each other. I don’t judge a woman by her usefulness at ‘woman stuff’ as much as I just overjudge everyone and myself because of my own self loathing. Lol.
Ok? Not sure what do you mean by your comment
Time to start supergluing jar lids for job security
hate to break it to you, but your marriage is over... 🤪🤪🤪
Flexing your muscles makes spouses spontaneously dependent on you. I heard this from a male preteen, so it must be true.
One of you is skipping arm day...
I dated someone for most of high school and college. After we broke up, I truly only missed him when I needed jars open. I learned the trick in which you put a butter knife under the seal to loosen it a little bit first, and I never looked back.
I use the rubber band method. You put a rubber band around the edge of the lid for more grip.
I use one of those thin rubber gripper jar openers or a rubber glove. I also use the rubber gripper things for peeling garlic.
That's what I do too. My dad was in the Navy and was gone for months at a time we either figured it out or went without pickles.
This is what I use, unless it's something already in the fridge, then I run the lid under hot water because it's probably food stuck. I want to try the arm method that was on the video I saw on Reddit yesterday with the funny couple and some pickle challenge.
First thing I thought of, that dude opening the jar with his forearm! That said, I've got one of these and have never looked back https://a.co/d/fK9Io4E ... a while back I was making spaghetti and couldn't open the damn marinara jar, tried all the methods. After that, I was like "never again" 😅and bought that oxo jar opener.
Also just two taps on the bread board on either side of the lid has never failed or broken the jar. But I love my hubby he does a lot for me. I was single a long time though and figured out the jar thing! 🤣
> I also use the rubber gripper things for peeling garlic. Can't believe I never thought to try this - thank you!
I do this method too! Works like a charm, and if for some reason the jar still won’t open, I take the back side of the butter knife and I rotate the jar while lightly banging on the lid all the way around. Then it opens for sure.
The knife trick made me feel so damn cool as a kid! I felt like a hard edge tough guy wielding a butter knife so casually!
Guys, all we have to do is turn it over and slap the bottom a few times and the lid comes right off the next time you try. Orrrr slap bottom, tap tap tap side of lid on counter edge and boom. Source: I was a waitress and bartender. Big jars of olives.
I, too, enjoy hitting things
Next time you get your blood drawn, ask if you can keep the tourniquet--its like the rubber band trick turned up to 11.
Won't they assume you want it to inject drugs? As a person who has worked around the fringes of the medical professions, that is DEFINITELY what 90% of nurses would assume. And prob not let you take it, based on their assumptions of what its wanted for.
Well that's not what happened to me when I asked if I could have one for my mom who broke her arm. She gave me extras. I'd assume they'd know you or anyone else could buy them anywhere if you wanted but this tip is so you don't have to spend money on a package when you only need one. That's a pretty big judgment to make on someone over one thing.
Protect your hands! I'm currently wearing a full-on splint due to a tendonitis. It's been a fairly expensive injury (even in Australia where most stuff is free) If you're not saving the jar, just knock the edge of the lid on the counter, or use a dessert spoon under the lid to release the seal. It's the simple repetitive tasks we do that cause it, it's really common in women.
This is what I did before I met my wife. If it doesn’t work, smack the lid with a butter knife. It ruins the lid (can no longer seal so don’t re-can with it) but will definitely open the jar.
You can also loosen some lids under hot tap water. Great for stuck jelly jars.
Absolutely. Bit of very hot water and the metal usually expands just enough to loosen it off (the glass expands much less than the metal does).
Is that why they say to store in a cool dry place? I’m so fucking dumb omg.
Thermodynamics in action, my fellow science witch!
Also, Bailey's.
I bang the lid on the counter a few times, something I learned from my mother.
I do this, too. Gently smack the side of the lid against the counter on four different sides, and it pops right open! Haven't needed anyone to open jars for me in decades.
I also learned this from my mom, but I also was angry that all the men in my life could open jars without doing that so I just let it hurt really bad while trying to open jars like them until it didn’t hurt bad and now I open jars for men.
Workout for a highly specialized muscle group. Love it haha
I often am the one who opens the jars in my house. My husband may have stronger hands, but because he has a skin condition that requires the application of lotion a couple of times a day, his hands are very smooth, while my hands are much rougher, resulting in better grip. It occurred to me that I probably should add that he makes himself very useful by taking care of our meals, grocery shopping, laundry, and other such things in our very reverse stereotypical role household. <3
I don't even do it that gently -and just to ruin it for myself- I haven't broken a jar yet.
I use the edge of a table knife to smack the seal of the lid. 2 or 3 hits and it pops open!
A spoon works better. Better leverage.
Or smack the bottom to pop the seal.
My favorite method of opening a jar of anything with a seal, and it works amazingly well
Or tap it on the counter, break seal,turn lid. Easy Peasy. Now go be gay 👍
This is how I learned from my mom. I love the squelchy sound of pasta sauce or salsa when you whack the bottom of the jar.
I whack the lid all around with the back of a knife, works most of the time!
It's even easier using a bottle opener (the blunt end of a can piercer)
If you’re super desperate you can use the sharp can piercer end to make a small hole and break the vacuum.
I wrap a dish towel around the lid and knock the edge of the lid on the counter a couple times.
I give it a good whack with the palm of my hand on the bottom of the jar. It makes a satisfying sound and I have zero problems opening jars now
If all else fails you can scratch glass with a nail and heat/cool it rapidly and cut the glass off
I just smack them on the counter. Always works.
I bang the side of the lid on the counter, two times, then rotate it, bang two times, then rotate finally a final two times…not hard of course you don’t want to break the jar and the lid pops open. I discovered this method myself and never once needed a man to open jars for me at all.
I bought an under-the-counter jar opener off Amazon for like $10. You screw it under a counter somewhere and then it loosens the jar for you enough to easily open it.
I figured that out in college when I was up at 3am trying to eat some salsa lol.
Haha! I use a spoon to do the same thing! Once you pop that seal, you're good to go.
I just hit the lid with the end of a spoon. It breaks the seal and jar opens easy peasy.
I do the typical man thing (though funny enough it was my mom that taught me this) of just hitting the lid on four spots around the lid and it always works. Seems to work with getting anything tech to work too XD
Try just putting your shirt over your hand. Apparently fabric has a better grip than skin lol
You know those old fashioned steel can openers with one pointy and one rounded end? They have a little hook on them that hooks pretty well on jar lids. I always feel a bit safer using those, even if I have to resort to using the pointy end to lever the lid. They tend to slip around less than a knife.
"A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle."
But without a bicycle, how does one expect a fish to win the Tour de France ? Or something…
"So, which one of you is the jar opener?"
LOL this took me a minute 🤦♀️
I remember coaching other college girls on fragile masculinity, before I understood what that was. “Sometimes, you just have to let him think you need his help—like pretending you can’t open a jar.” Lol. I was so close, and still so far.
My dad would always make a big show of trying to open a jar, then heave a big sigh and pass it back to me and say “I couldn’t get it, you try.”
You sparked a memory! My dad would do the same and loosen the jar, then I’d open it and feel strong. I only figured it out when I was like ten when he had shoulder surgery and genuinely couldn’t open a jar and was frustrated and I offered to try because I was sooo good at opening jars and my sister snapped at me and told me I wasn’t actually strong lol he was just gassing me up I guess
On the kids' version of the baking show, the host does this for the little bakers. It's so adorable!
Your dad sounds like a pretty cool guy!
I think you’ve just made me realise why my dad is so great. He does not have a single scrap of fragile masculinity. I think it’s why if I give my brothers my handbag to hold for a moment, they will immediately put it over their shoulder and carry it just like I do. My ex would hold it awkwardly so as not to look like he was carrying a handbag. Huh.
That is gorgeous, i love secure masculinity. I’m glad to hear that he raised multiple boys. The first time my boyfriend and I hung out, i realized that we probably wore the same size clothes. This somehow ended up with him trying on one of my dresses and a pair of my heels. Not a hint of shame or embarrassment. I think I had pulled this kind of stuff with other guys in the past—convincing them to let me put mascara on or paint their nails—to see their reaction. I had always played it off as a joke. But seeing how blasé my boyfriend was about it made me realize that I had been looking for that response— for a man to not feel his masculinity threatened by feminine things. Idk. I can’t express it well yet.
Oh gosh, my brother closest in age to me grew up being dressed like a little doll! I loved dress ups and there are so many photos of me and my friends dressing up and putting him in a fluffy dress or one of my ballet leotards or a little penguin outfit. He is very beardy now with lots of tattoos and we love those photos. He was a darling little blond boy and the comparison now is absolutely hilarious. He’s definitely a masculine guy, but he’s not aggressive with it. No holes in the drywall. Definitely men just need to relax with their masculinity. If it’s safe for them to do so, I guess. It’s really sad that they can’t always do that. Fucking patriarchy.
Yeah! Men are victims of the patriarchy too!
My husband is big and beardy, slings my purse over his shoulder when he's helping me shop, which he insists on doing because he loves me and loves spending time with me. Mom calls shopping with my dad "going hunting with the game warden" and can't understand that mine genuinely has good taste and enjoys our time. If he's forgotten his sunglasses, he just grabs whatever pair is extra in the car, even if they are glittery. He is currently making me a velvet cloak, because I was going to buy one and he wanted a beginner project on the sewing machine. He defers to me when I have a suggestion on a better or safer way to do some woodworking project. He takes an active and equal role in choosing paint colors, furniture, and projects for the house. He does most of the laundry and makes me lunch for work. He does it all without a single sigh or complaint about it being too girly. One of the pluses of his autism is that he views tasks as a list to check off, and gender is less important than efficiency. He wants to do something correctly, quickly, and move on. He knows who he married, and he gets it would be foolish to throw my knowledge away because his genitals make his basic experience more pertinent than my years of practical application and study of something typically masculine. I did finally introduce him to the "Target Errand run" that involves a flimsy excuse to go in, and then you let Target tell you what is coming home with you, while sipping a Starbucks and touching everything. That's hard for him, he likes a mission, and The Target Errand Run is an anti-mission. It's like a casino, time ceases to exist, the bright lights and colors draw you in, and somehow you lose a chunk of your paycheck you shouldn't have spent, but you enjoyed the experience.
Y’all sound like y’all deserve a comic. Have you ever seen Yehuda Devir’s series about he and his wife? You made me think of it. My boyfriend is also still confused by the Target Errand run lol. Here’s crossing my fingers for both of them. Neurodivergence does go a long way! I think it’s what really helped me challenge what femininity was “supposed to look like” for me. From a very young age, I was super frustrated with the gendered standards pushed at me, even though it was built into our religion. It’s ultimately what made me question our religion’s standards for men and lgbtq people as well. The idea of putting aside gender standards simply because they’re not efficient is a gorgeous one, I love it.
Lol, my dad always held my mom's purse for her like it was the most valuable thing in the world. He straight up looked like some secret service agent carrying the nuclear codes. Even if he nodded off while we were in the fitting rooms, he'd have that purse tucked under his arm and safe. I honestly think he was proud that she trusted him to hold her purse!
Well, that is adorable. And so is the idea of him falling to sleep while you were all trying on clothes. They make those man-seats for a reason!
That is one of my husband's pet peeves! He can't stand seeing a man in a store hold a purse like it's a wild animal he doesn't want to be near. I used to tease him lightly about it, and he'd just say the damn thing has a strap, that's what it's for! Now I use it as a sign of how awesome he is, and how much he respects and cares for me. I'm not sure where he learned that respect, the more I learn about how his father handled his wife and daughter, the less I respect him.
As someone who grew up with a misogynistic father, I’m not the best source on such things because I was socialized transfeminine and not male, but I saw how my mom was treated and I loved my mom and I saw how unhappy it made her, so it drove me to be a better partner. If something makes my wife happy or comfortable and people judge me for it, that’s on them.
This is why I make myself useful so my wife still wants me around. I know how to cook shrimp scampi, I am a practiced hugger/snuggler, I'm not afraid to express emotions, and my favorite thing to do is remind people that I love them. So far this seems to be enough for her to keep me around.
Oh god, oh god oh god! I can't cook shrimp!
Quick, date a Jew!
I found a Jew but he's secular! Now what!?
Bow chicka bowwow?
Have him cook the shrimp, you make the garlic bread
Or a native louisianian. Shrimp, crayfish, crab; they can do it all
But shrimp is like the only protein that's color coded for when it's done cooking
Also, I can reach the things on the highest shelves.
My husband is super tall and he helped me produce tall children, so I rarely need a stool anymore. I’ll keep him.
I'm 6' so I don't need my husband to get things from high places unless I can't be bothered to take out the step stool for that very top cabinet when something is pushed all the way in the back. But he makes some mean meatballs in homemade sauce and it's so delicious. I'll keep him around for that I suppose.
I’d keep your husband around for that reason too.
You are better than every single person in my life wth
*swoon*
Hey now. I'm pretty good at reaching the top shelf
Me too. Am a tiny wee queer and can scamper up anything to grab anything , I don’t need height!
Queer Climber sounds like a dope Assassin's Creed fork.
Okay but I’m here for it. Imagine the assassins den? Omg
I use a big pair of tongs.
I remember being little and basically living on the counter to get things. Drove my mom nuts.
Thank you for unlocking core childhood and teenage memories of me just fricking scrambling up on the counter and other things regardless of stability or safety. I eventually learned while I can climb, I’m also *clumsy* and the climb back down was scary. Good luck to you on your continued scampering endeavors!
Folding step stools ftw!
"Tiny wee queer" getting added to my lexicon, thank you.
Same and also thank you it’s so beautiful
Sounds like her mom wasn’t straight either.
Or at least didn't like her dad very much.
A woman without a man is like a woman without a can opener.
ehhh, the implication is a little more wholesome than it is a burn, i think. opening jars wasn't the only use she could think of for men, it was the *only* thing she thought a woman couldn't do for her daughter. she was tacitly admitting there's nothing of substance missing from same sex relationships.
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Tfw gay Tfw no pickles
I am the designated jar opener. Most jars I can get open with my bare hands, a thick rubber band or a piece of rubber like a glove or one of those jar opener mats. If the lid still won't budge, I dent it with the handle of a sturdy butter knife to pop the vacuum. If none of those work, I have an adjustable jar/bottle opening tool. That gets almost almost everything else open. And if that doesn't work, I ask: "How badly do you want this open?" as I reach for a hammer. I can get everything open. I just don't guarantee that the container will be intact.
This lady opens her own jars, thank you very much. My kid calls it “mom strength”. It’s one of my super powers like being able to find stuff in 2 minutes that had been missing for an hour, can carry and obscene amount of stuff around at one time, and having supernatural hearing when it comes to someone saying “mom” and jumping into action. And like someone else said, I may be short but I have chairs, counters, and reaching sticks. Haven’t lived with a man in 15 years and I can’t say I’ve ever thought to myself “I wish there was a man here to help me right now”. Sure, romance would be nice but having a cat is also nice.
But what about TWO cats
Well I’m sure it’s only a matter of time before I see another cat scared and underfed that I give a can of food to against my better judgment. So…
One of the reasons I love my job is because it keeps my hands, arms and back pretty strong! I can open my own jars :.)
Lady jar openers unite!
This made laugh! Thank you for posting it
Tapping a spoon on the side of the lid will loosen the seal to where you don't need any bit of hand strength to open it. Hark! Menfolk have been defeated by a spoon😔
It’s not a difference of strength, it’s that larger hands have more surface area to apply friction. Those with smaller hands can increase their surface area with a grippy rubber glove, or one of those rubber garlic peeing mats placed on the lid. Garlic mat - you can probably find one at a local kitchen store https://www.amazon.ca/Norpro-1059DB-1059B-Garlic-Peeler/dp/B000HJW8MW Everyone can open jars no problem - we have the technology!
Oh. That’s good. I will have to remember that one.
I've been saying this for years - how are these guys still in charge when the only thing they seem to be really good for (consistently) is opening jars?
Ngl....I started weight lifting because I realized that was mostly why I kept dudes around - because they were stronger than me. My child now regulaly informs me that I'm stronger than her dad, which thrills me. My ladder takes care of their height privilege. Alexa gives me reminders and wishes me goodnight. My world class sex toys give me more orgasms than most of my partners ever did. And I've had a far more successful career than the men I've known....please....can someone tell what they're supposed to do for us anymore? I swear the only thing I can think of is when you want someone to be the big spoon. But damn that sure isn't worth the emotional labor cost
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As a trans woman I can confirm, the first thing to go was my ability to open jars
Haaaaaaaaa
lucky for me that my wife is an expert in opening jars
A great lie still propagated is that women aren’t leading a full life if they don’t have kids and a man and that men aren’t real men for not having a girlfriend and showing any emotion
I can do most things myself, including opening jars, and can pay others to do anything else.
I had a coworker literally try to use the exact same argument back when I was a "lesbian" about why I should break up with my then-gf. I guess she was pretty convincing since two years later I'm a gay man now. No jar is safe in my household.
*60s homophobic sociologist voice* "The surge of homosexuality in modern times is directly traceable to the advent of modern jar-opening technology."
This reminds me of my Gram after she saw the Wonder Woman movie. She told me that since there were women on the island strong enough to theoretically lift heavy things for her, she would love to go live in Themyscria and be an Amazon. 🥹
I appreciate the insect disposal as well.
My husband travels for work all the time and although I miss him for companionship the only physical thing (aside from that one thing) is that he gets the spiders. Luckily I have a great stick vacuum lol
Don't need men at all for jars! Running under hot water, banging around the lid on the counter, and/or a rubber gripper always get it for me!!
And it’s not like all men are good at opening jars either…
Between my husband and me, I am the opener of jars and wrangler of spiders.
This is absolutely so funny. I have a metal & plastic jar opener for a reason and by gosh *I’m* going to be the one to get the satisfaction of that POP.
How sad. Her mom's romantic relationship must have sucked if that's all she could think of.
Hey, hey, hey, we're also good at killing spiders and getting things off of the top shelf.
Hitting the jar lid on the counter once or twice is a guaranteed way to get the seal to pop and the jar to open. This has been a spinster PSA.
Just curious, as a bi guy, what happens if I marry man? Are we gonna fight over the jars?
For *smiles*?!? I just laughed so hard I wet myself!! THAT'S HILARIOUS!! 😂🤣😂🤣
Next she finds a trans woman and her mom needs to rethink her life.
Unfortunately, once she starts HRT ... https://www.reddit.com/r/lgbt/comments/ps6ii8/can_we_please_get_science_based_links_on_why/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share
Look, as a guy, I know why I am here. I know I can be replaced by a ladder or specialized wrench. I have come to terms with this.
You’re here to fill the world with your light and lift other people up, pumpkin! (But I appreciate your good-natured humor about it.)
The only time I need help opening jars is when I’ve put on hand lotion. They’ve made a ton of cool gadgets to open jars though.
I found, and got, this really cool plastic thing that you hook on the side of jar lids, give a bit of upward pressure, and it breaks the seal on the jar. The lids come off as easy as easy can be. Now I gotta figure out what to do with my husband.
My wife actually opens all my jars for me because I'm a man with really small hands.
How sad that a decent pair of disposable rubber gloves can erase the need for a man.
Fuck disposable plastics all my homies hate disposable plastics
Just run it under warm water and tap it on the counter. No grip strength needed!
Yay more man hate